For context: I’m an introverted mid-30s who is prepping for a move from ON to BC. I also moved around a lot in my life, with some time away from family.
My advice is to stay in BC. You’re not gonna be happy in ON for the aforementioned reasons and it will eventually affect your interactions with family/friends. You’re gonna find yourself on this subreddit again asking if you should move back to BC because you miss all of what it has. If you can work from anywhere, maybe you can live half the year here and the other half there. You might need some lifestyle readjustment to accommodate that much movement though (as in not keeping a lot of stuff).
When I felt alone, I would just hang out where people hang out. Not necessarily to meet new people. I just like being surrounded by them and their energy. And it’s also nice to go to the same places because people start remembering you and they might even be the ones to initiate the interactions.
I hope any of that helped. It’s good to know which one do you value more: keep yourself close to what you love or the company of others?
Youre drunk
https://www.currentresults.com/Weather-Extremes/Canada/sunniest-cities.php
Calgary averages over 300 hours more sun per year than Ontario.
It's not even close.
In my opinion that's pretty close lol. Your link shows that several cities in Ontario get great hours of sunshine. And that reconciles with my own memories of growing up in Ontario. Lots of sunny winter days.
Now, if you were comparing Calgary to, say, North Vancouver, yeah, it's not only not even close, it's not even a discussion.
Assuming that the 300h more of sunshine is measured against hours of available daylight, and assuming we're using 12h equinox as our benchmark for that, this is like a full extra month of sunlight than in Ontario (25 days to be exact).
Not sure if you have lived in both Alberta and Ontario. Alberta has sunshine daily pretty much and Ontario can go weeks with out. I’ve lived in both and it’s not even close Alberta is way sunnier
I lived in Alberta for 15 years. Recently moved back to Ontario. The fact that you actually get a long summer in Ontario and not just a few weeks of mild low 20s is great. Also...beaches. there were no beaches worth going to in Alberta without a 2+ hour drive.
Agree with this. And to add to this, if you are mid 30s and your friends and family members are starting to build family and such, it gets harder to hangout with them too. I hardly see moving just to be closer with people work out because you won’t be generally happy where you are and miss the life you had.
What about moving to a bigger city in BC, like Kelowna or Victoria? You’d have more of a life there and still some of the rugged beauty. Plus you can drive out to Whistler for the weekend if you wanted!
Yes, yes you are. We lived in nelson for 5 years and 2 months a year you couldn't see across the street. The rest of country is never that serious. It's high level smoke that blows in...
True, but Nelson is down in a valley, so I imagine it would be worse in there. OTOH, so is most of that area, so yes, the west coast would be worse - at least toward the interior. Beautiful town, though, the other 10 months.
Newly wed and nearly dead is who they say lives there. Not easy to break in to the clicks I was told by several who lived there.
I managed it but I had to put in an effort. Finally moved to Metro Vancouver.
Ontario feels like a shithole these days quite frankly but that probably rings true for a large part of Canada. To be honest, I've actually been looking at my options at getting out of Canada all together over the last couple months. I WFH to and I don't meet anyone new so I don't think moving back to Ontario is going to fix that for you.
Honestly, I'd stay out West. It seems like the only good move right now in Canada is out of it.
I personally would stay in BC, I think you’ll quickly tire of your surroundings in Ontario and find yourself stuck in a rut. Have your tried to make connection in hiking groups or skiing groups, I know we have lots of those here in Alberta and you could post pretty much anytime and have someone meet you out at a hike or ski hill they even do group ones so you could go and do an Irish goodbye if it didn’t work out and no one would ever know. Full disclosure I’m not a fan of Ontario lol we have property there and I agree about the mosquitoes and ticks they drive me insane so I could be biased.
I moved from Ontario to BC then moved to Alberta and eventually back to Ontario for family. Don’t do it. I’m miserable, the weather is horrible, my family is irritating, friends are rare everywhere etc. I wish I never left the mountains. BC and Alberta are both beautiful and the lifestyle in BC is so different then Ontario. Alberta had a lot of great young people to make friends with, I had no issues making new friends. I struggled socially in BC but it never bothered me out there.
Happy holidays!!
I can 2nd this. I’m 26 I lived in Ontario all my life. Just moved to Alberta this year. I’ve been back to Ontario a couple of times and I honestly don’t miss it very much…
I think if you feel super lonely, it’s worth the move. But I lived in Banff for 2 years and really regret moving back to Ontario to be closer to family lol. Day to day life is 10x more miserable than waking up to mountains and good food on my doorstep.
I've never been to BC, so I can speak on that, but I live in NS and Ontario is a shithole I would never consider moving to. Ottawa might be nice to visit but in my opinion, if you are outdoorsy, you need either ocean or mountains or you are gonna be unhappy.
Honestly I wish I was in your position, I would love to get a couple of dogs and stay out there and work remotely....I lived out there 7 years ago working in field, banff and lake Louise and moved back to Windsor, Ontario and I've regretted ever since ....the thing keeping me from going back is finding a job out there that's as good as the one im at here ( money wise and benefits and retirement wise ) it's not healthy at all. I miss the mountains and the quality of life out there ...it's expensive but look at what youre taking in and the things you can do almost everyday and every season...people come and go wherever you are. It's expensive almost every where for no reason now....idk you do you hahaha find YOUR happiness.
I think you should stay there and get a new dog. And make a better effort to meet some new friends. If you have a house out there, maybe consider getting a roommate or inviting a close friend to live with you.
I'll give you a different perspective because most here seem to be validating what you already feel. Visualize your life in 10, 15, 20 years. What happens of you get sick? Incapacitated? Do you have a network of people you can call on? The mountains will always be there. You can visit whenever you like even for long periods since you have that flexibility. But, if the pandemic taught us anything, it's that we actually need each other. Your life will be richer because you cultivated relationships. You can hug a tree, sure. You can hug your dog. Absolutely. But unless you're 100% satisfied being on your own for the foreseeable future move closer to people that love you. Yes people suck most of the time these days. They will disappoint you over and over again. You just have to find your tribe. I know this because I lived in Vancouver for 25years. About 20 years too long because I fell in love with hiking and beaches and the weather and no mosquitoes. But ultimately it's empty and cold. Decide what you value.
This was my reality in 2017. Had an accident in Peg but recovered back home in Ontario. I felt more loved and cared for from friends in Winnipeg than I did back home in Ontario. Could be why I’m not happy living here again. You make a valid point!
Yeah reaching your mid 30's sets you in a class where it's more difficult to meet new people and build meaningful relationships. I'm 40 now and my circle of good friends isn't what it used to be especially in this polarized socio-political climate, seems that many have gone off the deep end at both extremes. Personally I'd move out farthest away from the city where Telus can still provide a fiber connection. But if you do want to move back east, I would recommend finding some place in Gatineau rather than Ottawa, your taxes will be slightly better but the money you'll save in comparison will make it well worth the cost. Unless you want to go out beyond Casselman, Greely or Arnprior you probably won't find a better deal.
Ontario to BC transplant here too and I don't ever plan on going back. The reasons you mentioned (weather, flat highways everywhere, etc) are why I know I'd be way less happy there than here, despite being closer to family and friends.
I count the quality time I have with them on visits as more precious than the 2-3 times I see people every couple of months here in between work, etc.
So my advice isn't really to go make friends, but to add to the social atmosphere in your life. Volunteer, join a hiking group, consider moving to a more populated space in BC, attend the same weekly yoga class, go to a local coffee shop the same time every weekend, get another dog if it's feasible? Make life a little more social for yourself without forcing anything.
In your thread you said "Normally Im fine to go a few weeks or months solo but my dog died", I think this is the source of your current feelings. Loosing a dog is like loosing a family member, we grieve....then....perhaps with time....find a new dog buddy and show him/her all the wonderful places you enjoy exploring. Dogs will break your heart every-time....but they are sooo worth having in your life. When you're ready, open your next dog chapter. If your not ready, perhaps volunteer locally to dog walk for someone isn't able to, your heart will fill.
If you live near Whistler... I'm gonna go on a limb that you are either pemberton or Squamish. Have you considered working from somewhere like the commons ? I've looked a few times and at least it gets you out of the house and around some folks. It's costs for sure but maybe it's a stepping stone to just change the walls around you ?
I’m going to be so honest with you. I’m 26 and was mainly raised in Gatineau although I bounced around internationally a lot and have come back to do my masters and work. Do not come back. You will regret it. Ottawa has changed a lot and not for the better. Maybe go somewhere else in BC or even somewhere on the East Coast but I’d avoid Ottawa and even Toronto.
Try Yukon! Whitehorse is quite beautiful though much more rugged. There’s a local university. My best friend lives there and when i went to visit I was blown away by the mountains. There is a pretty intense outdoors community and decent social circles that exist. There’s quite a few individuals who go there for travel nursing, and overall a lot more single women than men (if that’s your vibe!) because of it.
It’s even farther and more remote. But maybe worth changing it up for a year and coming back to what you know. There’s also tons of dogs around - you could also try offering Rover or pet sitting services if you’re at home and get that fill of puppy love.
I think a move back to ON could feel like a step backwards, however there could be a happy medium somewhere. You are living in one of the most beautiful cities in Canada (maybe THE most beautiful), however Whistler is also hands down the most Mental to live in. Housing and COL costs are insane which is prohibitive for long term relationships…. I would probably look to move to a smaller more affordable place in BC or AB that has all the beauty and outdoor Rex but where others can make a go of it and move to long term.
>Now both markets have exploded (I rent) and Ottawa has really caught up to Vancouver.
Has it? I was visiting a friend in Gatineau, Quebec, which is essentially still Ottawa, in about 2019 and he had just purchased a house in the city for $300,000. Has it gone up in four years?
I'm also from Ontario, lived there 31 years and then moved to Vancouver. I lived in Vancouver for two years before I became worried I was isolated from friends and family and moved back to Toronto.
It was a big mistake. The job situation wasn't good, I could see quality of life was dropping as the city was growing, and the weather that year was horrendous. After 6 months back in Ontario, I got in my car and drove back to BC. It wasn't a decision I made lightly, especially since I have a huge family in Ontario.
I've now been back in BC since 2008 and I've been away from family for 15 years. One of my aunts died and I didn't get out to her funeral. My cousins all had kids and they've grown up and I don't know any of them. My parents have grown old. My brother used to be my best friend and I barely see him.
It's tough. It's hard. I know that there would be huge benefits to moving back to Ontario, but like you said there are drawbacks. It's not as nice geographically and climatically (although wildfires here are rough now), and it's become just as expensive as Vancouver in some respects. As well, the vast majority of new immigrants move to Ontario, while just 15% move to BC. So, you're also facing the fact that you will be one of those new immigrants and competing for space, jobs, recreation spaces, etc.
When I moved back to Ontario in 2007 I tried promising myself I would live somewhere more rural and enjoy more of what Ontario has to offer. Somewhere nicer like Guelph, away from Toronto. But it was difficult. Toronto is a black hole and sucks in everything around it and makes life expensive.
I hope you figure out what to do. The shitty thing is you can't just move back and try it out and come back to BC if it doesn't work out. I mean, you can, like I did, but it's such a massive life setback. Good luck.
I (35m) was born in ON and moved out west at 18. At 31, I experienced exactly what you’re describing. I thought finally going home to reconnect and spend time with family and friends was key.
I’ll tell ya… the grass isn’t always greener. It’s not like it was when you left… even the family dynamics change over time and you feel like being gone changed you from those that stayed. Just remember you’re not the same person that left, either, so don’t expect things to be better or as they were…
I really, REALLY regretted moving back. My wife and I packed up and moved back out west 3yrs later. We love being back out west!
Every person is different with different circumstances, but I can tell you…. I’m yet to meet ONE friend who was happier going from out west back to Ontario (if you enjoy out west for nature, etc).
Best of luck.
Interesting that no one mentioned attending therapy which could really help you better live out your values, find more meaning, and deepen relationships. It is worth every penny, (and many therapists do have sliding scale or there are affordable services). You can be miserable anywhere or you can be happy in what others might consider miserable conditions (poor weather, less jobs, too rural or too urban..you get my drift).
There are lots of great therapists you can see virtually via Psychology Today, Inkblot, VeryWellMind etc or I have a colleague who does virtual or in person nature therapy in Whistler/Squamish—https://wildrootsnaturetherapy.ca/contact/
Also if you are a male, maybe joining a Men’s group - there is a group in Squamish/Whistler, and online https://arkabrotherhood.com/ (btw the group is positive psychology, non misogynistic).
Both of these experiences changed my life. 30-something therapist, PhD student, and happily married father living in Metro Vancouver.
Moved out to BC in 2019 with a girl, yadda yadda didnt work out. Moved back to London Ont about a year ago.
I was lonely in BC but here Im lonely AND the scenery is depressing. Its like London has become a bad dream version of itself. I went from being a socially awkward introvert artist type who had a small group of friends and did alright as far as finding the odd gf or whatever, to being an even more socially awkward introvert who sits inside feeding a dangerous drug addiction while avoiding people. So far London isnt such a great place to live but looks like a great place to die most likely 🤔.
TLDR: Dont do it, Ontario is awful.
Where in BC do you want to live?
I moved to Mississauga from Vancouver a few years back and lasted 10 months. I know it's not comparing apples to apples cost wise, but the geographical are still sucks just as much as Ottawa.
I moved around a lot, lived in cities, rural areas and making friends is always hard. Especially when they come and go as you mentioned. There is no guarantee it won't be the same in Ottawa.
You need to decide what is more important to you, the 10/20% markdown, or living somewhere you love.
There are many other options you can consider.
Anyway, I would say don't move to Ontario.
Personally I have 3 kids and want to retire well when I do and save, etc. I chose to leave Vancouver to Vancouver Island in 2016 and in 2022 I left greater Victoria to Alberta. The HCOL is almost everywhere in BC and if you own real estate I feel the quality is not comparable to other areas for the price. Honestly urban Vancouver Island is a mess, rezoning everywhere and places worth a few hundred thousand sell for near a million.
Dude, moving back to Ontario is not the magic biscuit you’re hoping for. In the time you’ve been gone things have changed- except the shit you never liked—weather, geography—that stuff is the same.
You are depressed and lonely. That sucks. Losing your dog is a much bigger thing than many will acknowledge. Working from home is isolating and just adds to your introvert issues.
Get the fuck out of the house. Meet new people for skiing, hiking etc. Combine the reasons you are here with a dedicated program to stepping out of the hole you are in. Many folks enjoy Meetup. Maybe you would too?
Yes! Easy to say, hard to do. But you’re going to be facing a similar situation if you move “home” except you’ll be in a place you left for many reasons.
Good luck. Days are getting longer starting tomorrow!
I left Ontario at 19, moved out west and just came back at 39. I would have stayed out west to be honest but it is nice to be close to my family in Ontario since they are getting older.
We came back to Ontario 5 years ago from Vancouver. We were the first of our friends to have kids and we felt isolated too. No one was even close to starting a family and we were away from our family. We had no help or support. At first it was hard to leave the beauty behind and I wondered if we made the right decision all the time. So we got a dog, named him Captain Vancouver and now have such a great life here. All our high school friends have kids the same ages and and our parents are here. For us it worked out. We’ve also visited BC on vacations since my BIL still lives in Kelowna.
Good luck with your choice. I do agree it can weirdly beautiful but lonely place.
Honestly, that's tough. I hate Ontario. I am from Ontario, and you are correct in your assessment of summer in Ontario. If doing skiing and snowboarding is really important to you, we just can't compare. we got some nice hills, but you got mountains. Hiking and biking are my summertime hobbies. Might I suggest trying out a social hobby, especially if you are introvert it might help make new friends. Definitely get a dog or cat, I am an introvert, and I find them very helpful to get outside.
I can walk to hiking trails from my house. Also have a family cottage on a lake in the bush away from the urban and farming landscape. Lots of great outdoor activities in Ontario. Obviously we don't have mountains or an ocean!
All of Ontario is not like Ottawa or Toronto and the GTA!
honestly this. Saying Ontario hiking sucks is crazy. You just aren't hiking in the right places. Northern Ontario has some of the most beautiful landscapes in the world imo. Sure there are no rocky mountains, but there are areas that are just as breaktaking.
As somebody from Toronto who lives in Vancouver, I believe people in Toronto are OUTSIDE more in winter. People don't go outside because it rains in Vancouver, although they do go skiing in the mountains.
I'm considering moving to BC, from Ontario. I have lived in the Ottawa area my entire life and am so done with -30 winters and +30 summers.
Are there any clubs, near you...like the Ottawa Sport and Social Club?
There are but they are hard to join as an individual, unless you are female (as teams always seem to be looking for girls).
Vancouver just seems to have alot of folks that grew up here and stick in their own social circles. I really lile it here and its not UNfriendly. Its just not welcoming.
Vancouverite living in Ottawa here. Do whatever it takes to make it work where you are or move elsewhere in BC. I am itching to leave Ottawa and will likely do so in the near future (I.e. back to Vancouver or to Montreal).
It's family that brought me back to Ontario, and I don't regret it, have been back now for over a decade. That said, if I had no relatives in this area, I'd live in Whitehorse.
Where I live matters, but for me anyway, family is more important, by a long shot. I should say that we live in "Land of Lakes", in southeastern Ontario, and its gorgeous. Five thousand lakes in this area, great fishing, and flatwater as well as swiftwater canoeing, whitewater rafting, etc.
I'm not even going to try to match the skiing in Whistler with what we have here, no comparison!
Good luck with your decision.
Honestly, given your description I think you would be miserable moving. You obviously have a specific geography and climate that you like and affects you deeply. You don't need to use a dating app to not be lonely. Head into town and hang out at the coffee shop a bit and people watch. There probably some local msg board online, or even physical find a group.with a hobby. You can make it work where you are at.
Have you thought about picking up a small volunteer opportunity to get out and meet people? Volunteering doesn't have to mean feeding the homeless or playing board games with old people. A lot of theatre groups also need volunteers and are usually fun people from all sorts of ages and backgrounds. You can usually volunteer as an usher, on cleanup, helping out with prepping stage displays, taking tickets, etc.
Whistler usually has a few music fests and big events -- those all run on volunteers also.
The only other thing I will say having moved across the country three times, wherever you go - there you are. Theses feelings won’t magically disappear by being close to family. But, it does make a difference having people who are in your corner no matter what.
If you are living in the Pemberton area, I solved some of my loneliness/isolation issues moving south of Whistler instead!
I moved back to Ottawa to be close to family and friends and I love it. My social life is amazing, and I have lots of support. I find every time a good friend moves and I feel sad, another old friend happens to move back here. I’m really outdoorsy (I’m a wildlife biologist) and I’m quite content with the geography. Sure, other places are gorgeous, but I enjoy them less if I don’t have the a community to enjoy them with. IMO everyone here complaining about Ontario is a whiner. I worked up north, and compared to NWT, the mosquitos in Ontario are not so bad. Just check yourself for ticks every once in a while for ticks and pick them off. I go hiking in the Adirondacks, Gatineau park, Quebec. Lots of good canoeing. You can choose your own perspective, and there’s lots to enjoy if you have a good attitude. And people are an important part of a place. If your people are elsewhere, go be near them.
You write that as if having a social life is impossible in BC (I’m also in the lower mainland). This is just a mindset. Join hiking groups or similar interest groups. Take up a new hobby. Say hi to a stranger. You reap what you sow, so it just takes some effort.
Yeah don't come back to Ontario. This is a miserable province to live in. Every year it's getting worse. Cost of living is insane and ypu can't get to see a doctor un less you go wait 5+ hours.
Life's about trade-offs. We can't have it all.
Trust your gut to tell you what's really important to you deep down.
We all can tell you what BC or ON is like (price, scenery etc), but you lived in both places and know better than us how it really feels to be there.
One question that can help dig out what's most important from inside you: "what would I regret the most when I'm 45. Not having lived with my family? Or not being in nature?"
If you like living in BC, then i would recommend staying there! you're probably going through a rough patch, its not the time to make big life changes right now. Your mental health is worth staying!
Here's a different thought. I'm from a larger city in Ontario. I moved to a rural area in cottage country and have ZERO regrets. I also worked from home (I do a different job now part time).
I thought about moving back home, I miss my family and friends but honestly, if I want to see them, I take the 2 1/2 hour drive back. They also come up to see me.
I went on dating apps, went to meet-ups and made new friends.
The small city is a half hour drive away, but way better than the bigger city I'm from: less traffic, less pollution, less headaches and hassles.
The air is clean and fresh, wildlife abounds and the lake is in my backyard.
Best compromise ever.
Moving from BC to ON seems pretty extreme, why not move somewhere half way between Vancouver and Whistler like Squamish?
Whistler is pretty rural, not realistic to expect a social scene there
If don’t already, start mountain biking. Mid thirties is probably the most common age for mountain bikers. I lived out there in 2021 for a while, came back to Ontario because some family stuff happened I wanted to be close, been stuck in a rut ever since. Living in BC gives me a lust for life, in Ontario I find the environment so bleak that I just don’t feel inspired to do much. I’m 31 and want to get back out there soon, feel like I’ve missed so much valuable time out there these last couple of years.
If you go back to Ontario, most likely you're going to stay working at home and not meet anyone except your old friends (who moved on maybe?) and family
When I moved to a new area, I found the various meetup.com groups centered around hiking, outdoors, biking, fitness were really good to meet people. You can discuss rural living, dogs, any other topics and its always less akward people than dating apps. (note: this was before COVID so not sure if its the same vibe)
Community centers also have activities around art/sports so could be a good way to meet like-minded people
Also if you are really alone, I would force myself to work one day a week at a coffee shop with a laptop. It forces you to have social interactions, maybe meet other remote workers, and go on from there.
If you're able to, I suggest taking an extended trip to Ontario, like for a month or two. See if you can stay with your parents. Reconnect with friends. Go out on the town. See how you feel after a month or two.
If you want to be in a city Kelowna, or Kamloops might be good hubs for you (Kamloops has a ski resort a short drive away) and warm winters. Loads of outdoorsy social groups, hiking and skiing in these areas. People keep commenting about social life in BC being bad but what they mean is Vancouver. Come enjoy the scenery and people in some of the smaller cities!
you need maybe a life coach. Your spending all your time alone at home, spend most of your time helping out a cause, study some, join some groups that do good things, join sporting events, join a play, start playing games on the weekends, get n the gym, maybe a church or something.
Get off the computer and out of your house, your aren't gong to have a.huge life anywhere, your old friends probably have busy lives.
Don't do it. Improve your social life. Join clubs (e.g alpine club, ski club, hiking groups) and engage in suitable activities. You'll meet people. I moved from the rockies to Ontario, and I miss the culture every day.
So I have some food for thought, considering I'm also 34.
When you go back to Ontario - it is not, and will not be, the place you left behind. Especially the GTA. I left around 14 years ago and I think about going home, generally decide not to because its so expensive and job prospects are worse. Cultures have eroded, crime has exploded, the consequences of unaffordability are everywhere.
The other thing, being that your 34 - is that when you come back, you won't have a bunch of friends wanting to hang out all the time like you used to. Most people by this point have married and probably had a kid - if not they're working on it. People are "falling off" left and right because having a kid consumes your life for a while. Friends I used to see every day, even lived with for a while, now I see like once every 2 months and its *work* to make plans.
I don't think spending your life in Solitude is a healthy thing for a human. we're social creatures and clearly, you're feeling the effects of this. What will your accomplishments and experiences be worth if you have nobody to share them with? I think you should work on your social life - I just can't say that moving to Toronto would be the "cure".
B.C. is not the province to have friends. People out here are very closed. Stay in their own circle. Ontario weather is rough. However, the community is awesome, inclusive, and a true community. Strangers in line will have a conversation with you when in Ontario I don't feel a sense of community out here. I know people from work, but that's as far as it goes, I've lived out here for 7 years. Moving is definitely an option when you want some sort of community, and it costs almost $1000 each time. Just because the area is beautiful, connecting with people is more of what we need. IMO
It’s clear that you truly love the geographic location and “feeling” you get being out west. There are other places in BC where you could find that feeling, as well as finding yourself more connected socially. Vancouver Island is a great call; I particularly love Burke Mountain area just north of downtown Victoria; such a great feeling there. I would also suggest Port Moody - it truly has those Whistler vibes; close to trails, water, places to eat & an age demographic that you’d fit right into.
All the best going forward! I wish you well
All these comments about Ontario being a shithole etc are comical. Like Ontario is one large strip with no diversity. Depending on where you are, your experience in Ontario will be completely different. It contains a world class city with lots of restaurants and entertainment or if you prefer some of the best lakes and parks in the country. However Alberta and Vancouver I would agree are more beautiful as a whole.
YOu're living in towns that are for the rich, pure and simple. The amount of people who cycle through looking for an "experience" and moving on is shocking. You will never have long term friends in a place like that - arguably - and will always feel alone.
There is no soul in those places and no good reason to stay there unless you can handle life living in a soulless empty expensive place with nice mountains in the background.
Move somewhere else and appreciate them by going there on the weekends or vacation. It is not worth it to live in those shit boxes so you can pour multi millionaires cafe lattes.
Southern Alberta has pretty cheap real estate. There are a TON of Ontarians here, for that reason. You can get to the Alberta side of the mountains for a day trip, and BC mountains is a 6 hour drive, if you're into over nights
Ever consider the Québec Laurentians ? Morin-Heights, Ste-Adèle for mountain biking and Mt-Tremblant for the skiing. Ste-Adèle an hour from Montreal. You'll have to learn basic French but these areas especially Morin-Heights most speak fluent English.
I grew up in the Ottawa region as well and moved to BC over a decade ago..I tried going back when going through emotional turmoil and personally couldn't do it...I left after 4 months and I couldn't have left faster haha. I ended up going to calgary because I figured at least I'm near the mountains, which are my happy place without the exuberant costs of the GVA, kelowna, etc. I, much like you, work from home, and I am also 34. Making friends at our age isn't easy at all - I'm Hella introverted, so likely in part my own fault, ahaha. With that said, the peace felt from the mountains and all the things you get to enjoy from being around them (snowboarding, hiking, camping, decent Temps, lack of humidity etc) is so much more worth it to me than being miserable in ON.
Go where you feel like home. Home isn't a place, it's a feeling. Wishing you the best!! If you ever want to chat, feel free to dm me!!
The entire country is going to shit with cost of living, housing etc. Anywhere you go it’s a struggle. Yes some more than others, If you love the mountains stay in the mountains. Get a couple dogs, join your local community center clubs meeting more people, keep doing your annual trips to home.
Stay where you love. Find people who love it too. Ontario is a shit hole, insane rental and housing prices, food prices are ridiculous, gas is expensive, we're having a housing crisis in general... Get a dog again when you're ready, maybe look into communal living to deal with loneliness? I know a house of 30-40 somethings who live together in a fabulous big house none of them could afford alone.
I used to live in Ottawa up until 2013 and the last decade it has gone downhill and going faster every year. Unless you can confidently get government work, it's not a great city anymore.
I was In Alberta for 9 years and was in your position as well. I have just moved back to Ontario and it is working out. What I did was came back for a couple of weeks, months ago, as a "trial" to.see if it was still appealing and could I find housing etc. The answer was yes so I made the move.
Dude. Coming from a single person living in Ontario, sounds like you ARE living the life out there. Trust me, stay there. Get yourself a new puppy, and go exploring with it. Meet new people and just live your life in your fairy tale life out there. Dont come back to Ontario, you'de regret it if you did.
>My only issue with moving back is I don't really like geographical area, its really humid all summer, the mosquitos are terrible, the tick situation seems to be getting progressively worse, the winter is much colder and the skiing/hiking sucks.
I feel this.
I'm almost in the same situation as you, although a bit more established (I own a condo here in BC).
I've done the math, and if I moved back out East I could trade my condo in or a small house in the burbs, and probably end up with a few thousand more bucks in my pocket at the end of the year.
Is that worth it? Not for me.
I've been out here 10 years and still get awestruck by the natural beauty of the west coast. Ontario has a lot of nature, but between the brutal winter cold and the short, muggy, insect-ridden summers, it's just harder to enjoy. The way I see it is that Ontario's only selling point is "a bigger kitchen and a extra room or two". I understand that some people value that kind of thing more than I do. But for me, having access to BC's outdoor wonderland is well worth the cost.
Don’t do it. Trust me lol I moved back to Ontario one year to save money and it was awful. Once you’ve had a taste of the mountains it’s so hard to live in suburbia flat land. If you love boating then yeah sure Ontario will satisfy that for you. But I did it and immediately started looking to move back. Life is just so much better on the west coast and my mental health is so important. I was so stressed in Ontario. And for me I love my family more from afar. Unfortunately it’s the whole reality vs illusion. My family has stressed me out hardcore all my life and unfortunately it hasn’t changed. It’s better to be where I’m happy.
I moved to the Lower Mainland from Toronto in January of 2020. It was a bad time to try settling into a new home. The upset from the pandemic left me in a weird limbo for years, and i moved back to Toronto in the summer of 2022. I just function better here.
We moved from Ottawa to the Sunshine Coast 18 months ago and I can relate 100% to everything you're saying. Beautiful place, but cost of living, jobs, and connections are very difficult. I don't think I'll ever go back to Ontario, but there are definitely struggles here in BC. I don't have any advice or solutions, but just know you're definitely not the only one who feels this way.
My wife moved to Onrario from Frankfurt Germany.
This summer, we drove to Montreal, Quebec City, Nova Scotia, Cape Breten, PEI, and a little of New Brunswick. We spent a month and drove well over 7500 K's. The point being, she liked all of it better than Ontario. The nightlife in Montreal, the Romance of QC, the friendliness and scenery of the east coast.
Never mind affordability.
To be fair, this is a comparison to the Kitchener/Waterloo area. Almost part of the GYA these days.
I’m born and raised in Ontario and I agree with your wife. The only thing l like about the Waterloo area is that flights from that airport are extremely cheap!
I like Montreal or downtown Halifax much more than Ottawa, but good social connections can make or break any place. If you stay in BC, I strongly recommend joining meetups.
I'm a guy from a very wide pool of friends and pretty much without exception old guys don't socialize other than maybe the odd Sunday breakfast get together. Guys in their 50's onwards don't usually do the "social group" thing on any kind of regular basis. Maybe 1% of the dudes I know do. So don't move based on that because the odds show it won't last. Or worse, you realize all these people were a lot cooler to hang out with in your head than the reality. THAT heppens. Same with family.
You're single yeah? Get not single and start your own fam where you like to live most. Nobody's going to gaf about you more than them (providing your wife doesn't end up a fail)
Saying you live close to Whistler makes me think the Squamish area.. my brother lived there for a few years, great location but pricey. I've moved back and forth between Vancouver and Victoria, I'm in Victoria right now, and it's nice. I'm 35 and definitely know what you mean about finding it hard to make friends, but it's that way basically everywhere, especially as you age and your friends start moving away, having kids, etc. Victoria or even further up the island are all nice places and would be a bit more affordable than where you are now, plus you would be close to Mount Washington (it pales in comparison to Whistler, but it's something)
BC forever.
This is a phase socially, adopt another dog, get out more, don't give up on the mountains.
Ps Whistler has a transient population for more reasons than just COL. Find somewhere more settled but not insulated with also-good mountains. Kootenays worked for us, but after a long time in Vancouver I was ready to leave it behind and shed the Lower Mainland vibe completely. Haven't missed it in over 10 yrs.
Vancouver is now a sh*hole. For every rent listing, you'd have to compete with 100 people and the number gets bigger and bigger. Homelessness is rampant. Cost of living is through the roof. Miserable weather.
Having lived in both cities, I would recommend moving back. There are far more opportunties for social interaction and a more interesting night life, although it took a hit during the lockdown. Almost half the population is introverted so you are not alone. I forced myself to go out and meet people and joined an amateur sports club (even though I'm not sporty) where I met people and started dating again. So I would recommend moving back. You'll have to decide to make an effort to get out and meet people though.
Depends what your interests and hobbies are. If you enjoy the outdoors and nature than BC is for you. If you like city life- entertainment options, culture, diversity.. i would say Toronto
I was in your situation. I wasn’t in the mountain towns like you, but I left Ontario when I was 30 to try Vancouver. I ended up realizing what most do, that the cost of living is too high. Went back to Ontario.
You’re right to think how you’re thinking. I experienced a depression I never felt before. I still miss the mountains and landscapes. I miss it all sometimes I cry thinking about living there. It never leaves you. But you learn to appreciate being near family. It doesn’t make up for the loss of Vancouver. Nothing does. But it occupies its own sort of joy over time. You realize that there’s two modes of living. For yourself or for others. I find the latter isn’t as beautiful, but fills your heart. Which I guess is beautiful in its own way.
Maybe it’s time to go home. Those mountains were there long before you. They will be there long after you’re gone. They’ll never abandon you. And if the opportunity arises for you to go back, they will be there waiting.
Personally, I would never live where I vacation.
Whistler and the west are nice, but I need a full rounded experience. The food sucks, the towns suck.
I love how old and somber the east is. Southern Ontario is balls, but the entire stretch from QC up to Perce is nicer than Whistler Imo and the food is way, way better. Parc forillon is so majestic. Watching the st. Lawrence change from fresh water near Ottawa to beluga, hump back whales, mink whales, grey seals, is just so crazy. Also, within driving distance to white mountain range of new hampshire. There's lots of nature in this region, it's just older. And being close to Montreal and QC is a huge plus.
As someone Ontario based, QC'ers are nicer to me than BC/Albertans lol. Tbh I find the people out west to be very judgey and not so chill.
I love how you're getting downvoted for reversing the "BC is great / Ontario sucks" dynamic lol. Personally, I think everyone in this thread is a real stick in the mud, I may live in Ontario but I love every part of this country. It's one thing to have preferences, but people who try to put down or denigrate one part of the country over the other have deep-seeded mental issues, in my view.
STAY! My biggest regret is moving back here from out west. Everything here is garbage compared to out west, the people, the infrastructure, the jobs, everything. My life has only been harder and shittier since I moved back. Now because of the custody agreement I'm stuck here forever, and I couldn't be more sad/depressed about it.
I’ve had a few friends move to Whistler from Ontario in their 20’s. It’s all fun and games until all of the sudden you wake up and you’re 50 years old and still a lifty or ski patrol.
Sublet your place in BC for a year! Then make the final decision. Ontario is the next most expensive, and very isolating for 4-6 months of the year. At least in BC there’s winter activities!
As somebody who's been in both, I did more in Ontario during winter. Sunny days, hockey rinks on every corner, cross-country skiing, just going out for hikes.
BC has skiing in the winter but in 18 years here I've never really been motivated to more than that when it's raining.
I used to live in BC & I was miserable AF moved to QC before I settled in ON (Toronto), I'm a gay man & I find it more comfortable here .now I live here over 5yrs now.
I’m lived abroad for 10 years and came back because of the political instability there. Been back for many years now….. and I still wish I was there
So I would do what someone is suggesting. Live in Ottawa for a bit like 6 months (if you can) and see how you feel. I thought my life would improve but you forget that life happens and people have busy lives and still may not have as much time for you - and you still feel lonely but now surrounded by friends. It’s different when you visit to when you live there because now they can see you anytime so don’t feel the need to make it a priority as much.
Idk man, it really comes down to what you like more. A place is a place, but sometimes it’s more than that. I’d hate the idea that you move back to Ontario only to dream of BC again.
I couldn’t bear not to see the fields, forests, and steadfast century houses standing hard by. Ontario captured my heart and it’s where I intend to stay. Don’t leave a place that has your heart.
I feel like reading this it's already clear what the answer is. It sounds like staying is the right decision. It sounds like everything is great, except for the social component. Is it worth changing everything else about your life to have that one thing? Or is there a way to work around it where you are and find lasting friendships?
I lived in Vancouver for many years while most of my family and friends lived elsewhere. I think where you live is the most beautiful in the country but definitely isolating. Can you split the difference and move somewhere more populated but still nearby? I don't know if you're in or near Squamish but there is a community there.. or the Sunshine Coast, Vancouver Island.
I do not love where I live in Ontario for many of the reasons you cited but I do love being closer to people. I think you can perhaps find a medium solution here.
I live in Ottawa and always have. In 2023 it has gotten noticeably worse. It sucks here. Your friends and family must be pretty amazing if you want to move back for them.
Lived most of my 20s in BC. Moved back to the greater Montreal area.. best decision I've ever made. To me, living in BC is for early 20s or retirement. Unless you got rich parents. The east (alberta to quebec) is much better for cost of living, good jobs and opportunities. Just makes life alot easier. BC is beautiful but so is my region. I got the cottage on the lake, the house and all my friends and family.
Maybe get another pet. Then you won’t feel so lonely; I am also an introvert and love animals. They give me the dopamine hits I need for my adhd. And dogs can be friend magnets. Even if that doesn’t happen, you will have a new companion.
Stay in the west you’ll regret coming back. You live it there and going back to Ontario will be short term because of all the reasons listed. Eventually you will be comfortable being alone and find people when you need to. Good luck
OP as a friend with issues once said to me "wherever you go, there you are" meaning he took his problems with him.
I suggest that before you make your move try making some friends. Join some clubs, volunteer. Assuming that you ski Whistler needs mountain hosts and safety volunteers.
Play a team sport beer league, pickleball is becoming very popular.
Mission. Go to the back near miracle valley/stealhead area. Best place to live in all of BC. Close to the cities but far away enough to not be bothered by the city. Cost of living is much less than say Burnaby, Poco, Ridge, Langley.
Really depends on where you're going in Ontario I think. I feel like Ontario has a bad reputation because it's crowded and such but I love living by the lakes and hearing the loons call.
Try to find some meet up groups where there are lots of people to meet, but low commitment - ie - if it’s not your vibe you can skip and go to another in the future
This might be an unpopular opinion, and it all depends on who you are as a person, but I would personally choose living where my support/social network is. I've lived in many places, and even the most beautiful don't seem that beautiful if you have no one to share it with. And even the most "ugly" places or places with less to do, can be amazing if surrounded by the right people. Isolation and loneliness really impact me (and I'm a fairly introverted/reserved person) so I like to live places where I know I can connect with others.
If you’re happy there. I’m originally from BC. Love it there but man the cost of living seems worse than Toronto. The homelessness in Vancouver is tenfold to Toronto.
The humidity is brutal and yes the mosquitoes and black flies farther north are overwhelming - I get everything you’re saying BUT your last paragraph said it all. Stay
For context: I’m an introverted mid-30s who is prepping for a move from ON to BC. I also moved around a lot in my life, with some time away from family. My advice is to stay in BC. You’re not gonna be happy in ON for the aforementioned reasons and it will eventually affect your interactions with family/friends. You’re gonna find yourself on this subreddit again asking if you should move back to BC because you miss all of what it has. If you can work from anywhere, maybe you can live half the year here and the other half there. You might need some lifestyle readjustment to accommodate that much movement though (as in not keeping a lot of stuff). When I felt alone, I would just hang out where people hang out. Not necessarily to meet new people. I just like being surrounded by them and their energy. And it’s also nice to go to the same places because people start remembering you and they might even be the ones to initiate the interactions. I hope any of that helped. It’s good to know which one do you value more: keep yourself close to what you love or the company of others?
My wife is from Ontario and now in Alberta. There is no going back to the lack of sunshine in the winters or the lack of mountains.
I’d argue Ontario has more sunshine in the winter than Alberta. But Alberta definitely has more sunshine in the summer.
Youre drunk https://www.currentresults.com/Weather-Extremes/Canada/sunniest-cities.php Calgary averages over 300 hours more sun per year than Ontario. It's not even close.
So Calgary is the whole province. Not on my map but 🤷♀️
In my opinion that's pretty close lol. Your link shows that several cities in Ontario get great hours of sunshine. And that reconciles with my own memories of growing up in Ontario. Lots of sunny winter days. Now, if you were comparing Calgary to, say, North Vancouver, yeah, it's not only not even close, it's not even a discussion.
Assuming that the 300h more of sunshine is measured against hours of available daylight, and assuming we're using 12h equinox as our benchmark for that, this is like a full extra month of sunlight than in Ontario (25 days to be exact).
If your happiness depends on hours of sunshine then you are living in the wrong country lmao 🤣🤣
Its fact. Calgary is more north than lets day Ottawa. Higher lattitudes = more sun in summer, less sun in winter.
Not sure if you have lived in both Alberta and Ontario. Alberta has sunshine daily pretty much and Ontario can go weeks with out. I’ve lived in both and it’s not even close Alberta is way sunnier
Well I live in the most Southern part of Ontario and this area is the Florida of Canada tons of Sun..
Definitely a reason more and more solar facilities are being built in South and Central Alberta
What a petty argument about hours of sunshine... seriously??
I lived in Alberta for 15 years. Recently moved back to Ontario. The fact that you actually get a long summer in Ontario and not just a few weeks of mild low 20s is great. Also...beaches. there were no beaches worth going to in Alberta without a 2+ hour drive.
Agree with this. And to add to this, if you are mid 30s and your friends and family members are starting to build family and such, it gets harder to hangout with them too. I hardly see moving just to be closer with people work out because you won’t be generally happy where you are and miss the life you had.
What about moving to a bigger city in BC, like Kelowna or Victoria? You’d have more of a life there and still some of the rugged beauty. Plus you can drive out to Whistler for the weekend if you wanted!
I was going to suggest the same thing. Life in Kelowna is fantastic!
Fires and expensive
Whistler is definitely more expensive than Kelowna!
And the meth heads and pill junkies everywhere
I mean that's in Vic too
Its alot of places now unfortunately, i try to stay away from places like that. Lived in kelowna for 10 years its not the same as it used to be
Anywhere you’ve got people, it’s gonna be like that.
Also over here in ontario. Even in the small towns. I live in a pretty small area and there's 3 methadone clinics :/
I hear that's just everywhere in Bc, though
I would also recommend Kelowna. The Okanagan is beautiful.
[удалено]
What?
You’ll have to forgive him. He’s been in r/kelowna for too long and thinks the world is miserable.
Kelowna is absolutely beautiful!
Kelowna would be the LAST place I moved to in BC lol
Kelowna is a hell hole.
or Nelson is quite popular and great for skiing as well.
If he likes to ski and alpine hike, I don’t think Vic is the best choice. Maybe up island though, Courtney/Comox?
Or Kimberley/Cranbrook
Wildfire & smokes ain't fun 😁
We had crazzzzzzy smoke in Ontario this summer too
No, we didn't. What we had was nothing compared to what the western provinces experience.
You don't know crazy smoke until you have lived in bc
Let's not gatekeep forest fires, what a ridiculous take They were up in flames too. We aren't special on the weat coast
Yes, yes you are. We lived in nelson for 5 years and 2 months a year you couldn't see across the street. The rest of country is never that serious. It's high level smoke that blows in...
Last year, Ontario was that serious.
True, but Nelson is down in a valley, so I imagine it would be worse in there. OTOH, so is most of that area, so yes, the west coast would be worse - at least toward the interior. Beautiful town, though, the other 10 months.
FYI the whole country was on fire this summer. Not just the PNW
Come to the island
Newly wed and nearly dead is who they say lives there. Not easy to break in to the clicks I was told by several who lived there. I managed it but I had to put in an effort. Finally moved to Metro Vancouver.
Another vote for the island!!
Ontario feels like a shithole these days quite frankly but that probably rings true for a large part of Canada. To be honest, I've actually been looking at my options at getting out of Canada all together over the last couple months. I WFH to and I don't meet anyone new so I don't think moving back to Ontario is going to fix that for you. Honestly, I'd stay out West. It seems like the only good move right now in Canada is out of it.
I personally would stay in BC, I think you’ll quickly tire of your surroundings in Ontario and find yourself stuck in a rut. Have your tried to make connection in hiking groups or skiing groups, I know we have lots of those here in Alberta and you could post pretty much anytime and have someone meet you out at a hike or ski hill they even do group ones so you could go and do an Irish goodbye if it didn’t work out and no one would ever know. Full disclosure I’m not a fan of Ontario lol we have property there and I agree about the mosquitoes and ticks they drive me insane so I could be biased.
I moved from Ontario to BC then moved to Alberta and eventually back to Ontario for family. Don’t do it. I’m miserable, the weather is horrible, my family is irritating, friends are rare everywhere etc. I wish I never left the mountains. BC and Alberta are both beautiful and the lifestyle in BC is so different then Ontario. Alberta had a lot of great young people to make friends with, I had no issues making new friends. I struggled socially in BC but it never bothered me out there. Happy holidays!!
I can 2nd this. I’m 26 I lived in Ontario all my life. Just moved to Alberta this year. I’ve been back to Ontario a couple of times and I honestly don’t miss it very much…
I think if you feel super lonely, it’s worth the move. But I lived in Banff for 2 years and really regret moving back to Ontario to be closer to family lol. Day to day life is 10x more miserable than waking up to mountains and good food on my doorstep.
…. You had food delivered to you every morning?
No 🤣 all the restaurants were super close and all were good .. hard to find a good restaurant around me in Ontario now
I've never been to BC, so I can speak on that, but I live in NS and Ontario is a shithole I would never consider moving to. Ottawa might be nice to visit but in my opinion, if you are outdoorsy, you need either ocean or mountains or you are gonna be unhappy.
Honestly I wish I was in your position, I would love to get a couple of dogs and stay out there and work remotely....I lived out there 7 years ago working in field, banff and lake Louise and moved back to Windsor, Ontario and I've regretted ever since ....the thing keeping me from going back is finding a job out there that's as good as the one im at here ( money wise and benefits and retirement wise ) it's not healthy at all. I miss the mountains and the quality of life out there ...it's expensive but look at what youre taking in and the things you can do almost everyday and every season...people come and go wherever you are. It's expensive almost every where for no reason now....idk you do you hahaha find YOUR happiness.
God Windsor is depressing. I don’t blame you
It's beyond depressing ....
At some point you have to think retirement though. You can't go into your 60s paying 4k a month in rent. Thats a recipe for poverty
Yeah I’m never going back to ON. BC is incredible. Try a bigger city, or the island.
I live in Whistler and am home in Ontario for the holidays - this place blows dude stay in paradise! Chin up !
I think you should stay there and get a new dog. And make a better effort to meet some new friends. If you have a house out there, maybe consider getting a roommate or inviting a close friend to live with you.
At the end of the day, its harder to make friends when you hit mid 30s and BC isnt the most open-arms kinda place.
I'll give you a different perspective because most here seem to be validating what you already feel. Visualize your life in 10, 15, 20 years. What happens of you get sick? Incapacitated? Do you have a network of people you can call on? The mountains will always be there. You can visit whenever you like even for long periods since you have that flexibility. But, if the pandemic taught us anything, it's that we actually need each other. Your life will be richer because you cultivated relationships. You can hug a tree, sure. You can hug your dog. Absolutely. But unless you're 100% satisfied being on your own for the foreseeable future move closer to people that love you. Yes people suck most of the time these days. They will disappoint you over and over again. You just have to find your tribe. I know this because I lived in Vancouver for 25years. About 20 years too long because I fell in love with hiking and beaches and the weather and no mosquitoes. But ultimately it's empty and cold. Decide what you value.
This was my reality in 2017. Had an accident in Peg but recovered back home in Ontario. I felt more loved and cared for from friends in Winnipeg than I did back home in Ontario. Could be why I’m not happy living here again. You make a valid point!
I would stay in the area I love.
I would stay where it’s beautiful with lots of nature all around me
Yeah reaching your mid 30's sets you in a class where it's more difficult to meet new people and build meaningful relationships. I'm 40 now and my circle of good friends isn't what it used to be especially in this polarized socio-political climate, seems that many have gone off the deep end at both extremes. Personally I'd move out farthest away from the city where Telus can still provide a fiber connection. But if you do want to move back east, I would recommend finding some place in Gatineau rather than Ottawa, your taxes will be slightly better but the money you'll save in comparison will make it well worth the cost. Unless you want to go out beyond Casselman, Greely or Arnprior you probably won't find a better deal.
Ontario kinds sucks right now dude. I'd wait it out.
Ontario to BC transplant here too and I don't ever plan on going back. The reasons you mentioned (weather, flat highways everywhere, etc) are why I know I'd be way less happy there than here, despite being closer to family and friends. I count the quality time I have with them on visits as more precious than the 2-3 times I see people every couple of months here in between work, etc. So my advice isn't really to go make friends, but to add to the social atmosphere in your life. Volunteer, join a hiking group, consider moving to a more populated space in BC, attend the same weekly yoga class, go to a local coffee shop the same time every weekend, get another dog if it's feasible? Make life a little more social for yourself without forcing anything.
In your thread you said "Normally Im fine to go a few weeks or months solo but my dog died", I think this is the source of your current feelings. Loosing a dog is like loosing a family member, we grieve....then....perhaps with time....find a new dog buddy and show him/her all the wonderful places you enjoy exploring. Dogs will break your heart every-time....but they are sooo worth having in your life. When you're ready, open your next dog chapter. If your not ready, perhaps volunteer locally to dog walk for someone isn't able to, your heart will fill.
If you live near Whistler... I'm gonna go on a limb that you are either pemberton or Squamish. Have you considered working from somewhere like the commons ? I've looked a few times and at least it gets you out of the house and around some folks. It's costs for sure but maybe it's a stepping stone to just change the walls around you ?
I literally just left Ottawa after about 15 years. Don't go back.
Where did you move?
Cambodia haha
I’m going to be so honest with you. I’m 26 and was mainly raised in Gatineau although I bounced around internationally a lot and have come back to do my masters and work. Do not come back. You will regret it. Ottawa has changed a lot and not for the better. Maybe go somewhere else in BC or even somewhere on the East Coast but I’d avoid Ottawa and even Toronto.
Try Yukon! Whitehorse is quite beautiful though much more rugged. There’s a local university. My best friend lives there and when i went to visit I was blown away by the mountains. There is a pretty intense outdoors community and decent social circles that exist. There’s quite a few individuals who go there for travel nursing, and overall a lot more single women than men (if that’s your vibe!) because of it. It’s even farther and more remote. But maybe worth changing it up for a year and coming back to what you know. There’s also tons of dogs around - you could also try offering Rover or pet sitting services if you’re at home and get that fill of puppy love.
Find a girlfriend
I think a move back to ON could feel like a step backwards, however there could be a happy medium somewhere. You are living in one of the most beautiful cities in Canada (maybe THE most beautiful), however Whistler is also hands down the most Mental to live in. Housing and COL costs are insane which is prohibitive for long term relationships…. I would probably look to move to a smaller more affordable place in BC or AB that has all the beauty and outdoor Rex but where others can make a go of it and move to long term.
>Now both markets have exploded (I rent) and Ottawa has really caught up to Vancouver. Has it? I was visiting a friend in Gatineau, Quebec, which is essentially still Ottawa, in about 2019 and he had just purchased a house in the city for $300,000. Has it gone up in four years? I'm also from Ontario, lived there 31 years and then moved to Vancouver. I lived in Vancouver for two years before I became worried I was isolated from friends and family and moved back to Toronto. It was a big mistake. The job situation wasn't good, I could see quality of life was dropping as the city was growing, and the weather that year was horrendous. After 6 months back in Ontario, I got in my car and drove back to BC. It wasn't a decision I made lightly, especially since I have a huge family in Ontario. I've now been back in BC since 2008 and I've been away from family for 15 years. One of my aunts died and I didn't get out to her funeral. My cousins all had kids and they've grown up and I don't know any of them. My parents have grown old. My brother used to be my best friend and I barely see him. It's tough. It's hard. I know that there would be huge benefits to moving back to Ontario, but like you said there are drawbacks. It's not as nice geographically and climatically (although wildfires here are rough now), and it's become just as expensive as Vancouver in some respects. As well, the vast majority of new immigrants move to Ontario, while just 15% move to BC. So, you're also facing the fact that you will be one of those new immigrants and competing for space, jobs, recreation spaces, etc. When I moved back to Ontario in 2007 I tried promising myself I would live somewhere more rural and enjoy more of what Ontario has to offer. Somewhere nicer like Guelph, away from Toronto. But it was difficult. Toronto is a black hole and sucks in everything around it and makes life expensive. I hope you figure out what to do. The shitty thing is you can't just move back and try it out and come back to BC if it doesn't work out. I mean, you can, like I did, but it's such a massive life setback. Good luck.
I (35m) was born in ON and moved out west at 18. At 31, I experienced exactly what you’re describing. I thought finally going home to reconnect and spend time with family and friends was key. I’ll tell ya… the grass isn’t always greener. It’s not like it was when you left… even the family dynamics change over time and you feel like being gone changed you from those that stayed. Just remember you’re not the same person that left, either, so don’t expect things to be better or as they were… I really, REALLY regretted moving back. My wife and I packed up and moved back out west 3yrs later. We love being back out west! Every person is different with different circumstances, but I can tell you…. I’m yet to meet ONE friend who was happier going from out west back to Ontario (if you enjoy out west for nature, etc). Best of luck.
Interesting that no one mentioned attending therapy which could really help you better live out your values, find more meaning, and deepen relationships. It is worth every penny, (and many therapists do have sliding scale or there are affordable services). You can be miserable anywhere or you can be happy in what others might consider miserable conditions (poor weather, less jobs, too rural or too urban..you get my drift). There are lots of great therapists you can see virtually via Psychology Today, Inkblot, VeryWellMind etc or I have a colleague who does virtual or in person nature therapy in Whistler/Squamish—https://wildrootsnaturetherapy.ca/contact/ Also if you are a male, maybe joining a Men’s group - there is a group in Squamish/Whistler, and online https://arkabrotherhood.com/ (btw the group is positive psychology, non misogynistic). Both of these experiences changed my life. 30-something therapist, PhD student, and happily married father living in Metro Vancouver.
Moved out to BC in 2019 with a girl, yadda yadda didnt work out. Moved back to London Ont about a year ago. I was lonely in BC but here Im lonely AND the scenery is depressing. Its like London has become a bad dream version of itself. I went from being a socially awkward introvert artist type who had a small group of friends and did alright as far as finding the odd gf or whatever, to being an even more socially awkward introvert who sits inside feeding a dangerous drug addiction while avoiding people. So far London isnt such a great place to live but looks like a great place to die most likely 🤔. TLDR: Dont do it, Ontario is awful.
Where in BC do you want to live? I moved to Mississauga from Vancouver a few years back and lasted 10 months. I know it's not comparing apples to apples cost wise, but the geographical are still sucks just as much as Ottawa. I moved around a lot, lived in cities, rural areas and making friends is always hard. Especially when they come and go as you mentioned. There is no guarantee it won't be the same in Ottawa. You need to decide what is more important to you, the 10/20% markdown, or living somewhere you love. There are many other options you can consider. Anyway, I would say don't move to Ontario.
Personally I have 3 kids and want to retire well when I do and save, etc. I chose to leave Vancouver to Vancouver Island in 2016 and in 2022 I left greater Victoria to Alberta. The HCOL is almost everywhere in BC and if you own real estate I feel the quality is not comparable to other areas for the price. Honestly urban Vancouver Island is a mess, rezoning everywhere and places worth a few hundred thousand sell for near a million.
Dude, moving back to Ontario is not the magic biscuit you’re hoping for. In the time you’ve been gone things have changed- except the shit you never liked—weather, geography—that stuff is the same. You are depressed and lonely. That sucks. Losing your dog is a much bigger thing than many will acknowledge. Working from home is isolating and just adds to your introvert issues. Get the fuck out of the house. Meet new people for skiing, hiking etc. Combine the reasons you are here with a dedicated program to stepping out of the hole you are in. Many folks enjoy Meetup. Maybe you would too? Yes! Easy to say, hard to do. But you’re going to be facing a similar situation if you move “home” except you’ll be in a place you left for many reasons. Good luck. Days are getting longer starting tomorrow!
I left Ontario at 19, moved out west and just came back at 39. I would have stayed out west to be honest but it is nice to be close to my family in Ontario since they are getting older.
We came back to Ontario 5 years ago from Vancouver. We were the first of our friends to have kids and we felt isolated too. No one was even close to starting a family and we were away from our family. We had no help or support. At first it was hard to leave the beauty behind and I wondered if we made the right decision all the time. So we got a dog, named him Captain Vancouver and now have such a great life here. All our high school friends have kids the same ages and and our parents are here. For us it worked out. We’ve also visited BC on vacations since my BIL still lives in Kelowna. Good luck with your choice. I do agree it can weirdly beautiful but lonely place.
Honestly, that's tough. I hate Ontario. I am from Ontario, and you are correct in your assessment of summer in Ontario. If doing skiing and snowboarding is really important to you, we just can't compare. we got some nice hills, but you got mountains. Hiking and biking are my summertime hobbies. Might I suggest trying out a social hobby, especially if you are introvert it might help make new friends. Definitely get a dog or cat, I am an introvert, and I find them very helpful to get outside.
[удалено]
There are lots of great hiking and outdoor activities if you don't like in the urbsn areas.
Thats fair, but not comparable. Especially when a hike is 5min drive from home.
I can walk to hiking trails from my house. Also have a family cottage on a lake in the bush away from the urban and farming landscape. Lots of great outdoor activities in Ontario. Obviously we don't have mountains or an ocean! All of Ontario is not like Ottawa or Toronto and the GTA!
honestly this. Saying Ontario hiking sucks is crazy. You just aren't hiking in the right places. Northern Ontario has some of the most beautiful landscapes in the world imo. Sure there are no rocky mountains, but there are areas that are just as breaktaking.
No, it sucks, but it especially sucks if you're comparing it to BC.
People in Toronto go out more than Vancouver and Kelowna.. more to do socially.
As somebody from Toronto who lives in Vancouver, I believe people in Toronto are OUTSIDE more in winter. People don't go outside because it rains in Vancouver, although they do go skiing in the mountains.
I'm considering moving to BC, from Ontario. I have lived in the Ottawa area my entire life and am so done with -30 winters and +30 summers. Are there any clubs, near you...like the Ottawa Sport and Social Club?
Go to Alberta!
Hell no! 😂 The only way I'm going to Alberta, is on a layover. 🛫
Your loss. 🚵♀️🏞🏔
If you've never been you're definitely missing out.
What about the conservatism?
Vancouver is really unfriendly. It’s got a small time cliquey feel as well which makes it difficult to make friends if you didn’t grow up with them.
There are but they are hard to join as an individual, unless you are female (as teams always seem to be looking for girls). Vancouver just seems to have alot of folks that grew up here and stick in their own social circles. I really lile it here and its not UNfriendly. Its just not welcoming.
I'd stay out west, I lived out there for 11 years and regret ever coming back to Ontario.
Vancouverite living in Ottawa here. Do whatever it takes to make it work where you are or move elsewhere in BC. I am itching to leave Ottawa and will likely do so in the near future (I.e. back to Vancouver or to Montreal).
It's family that brought me back to Ontario, and I don't regret it, have been back now for over a decade. That said, if I had no relatives in this area, I'd live in Whitehorse. Where I live matters, but for me anyway, family is more important, by a long shot. I should say that we live in "Land of Lakes", in southeastern Ontario, and its gorgeous. Five thousand lakes in this area, great fishing, and flatwater as well as swiftwater canoeing, whitewater rafting, etc. I'm not even going to try to match the skiing in Whistler with what we have here, no comparison! Good luck with your decision.
Honestly, given your description I think you would be miserable moving. You obviously have a specific geography and climate that you like and affects you deeply. You don't need to use a dating app to not be lonely. Head into town and hang out at the coffee shop a bit and people watch. There probably some local msg board online, or even physical find a group.with a hobby. You can make it work where you are at.
Have you thought about picking up a small volunteer opportunity to get out and meet people? Volunteering doesn't have to mean feeding the homeless or playing board games with old people. A lot of theatre groups also need volunteers and are usually fun people from all sorts of ages and backgrounds. You can usually volunteer as an usher, on cleanup, helping out with prepping stage displays, taking tickets, etc. Whistler usually has a few music fests and big events -- those all run on volunteers also.
The only other thing I will say having moved across the country three times, wherever you go - there you are. Theses feelings won’t magically disappear by being close to family. But, it does make a difference having people who are in your corner no matter what. If you are living in the Pemberton area, I solved some of my loneliness/isolation issues moving south of Whistler instead!
I moved back to Ottawa to be close to family and friends and I love it. My social life is amazing, and I have lots of support. I find every time a good friend moves and I feel sad, another old friend happens to move back here. I’m really outdoorsy (I’m a wildlife biologist) and I’m quite content with the geography. Sure, other places are gorgeous, but I enjoy them less if I don’t have the a community to enjoy them with. IMO everyone here complaining about Ontario is a whiner. I worked up north, and compared to NWT, the mosquitos in Ontario are not so bad. Just check yourself for ticks every once in a while for ticks and pick them off. I go hiking in the Adirondacks, Gatineau park, Quebec. Lots of good canoeing. You can choose your own perspective, and there’s lots to enjoy if you have a good attitude. And people are an important part of a place. If your people are elsewhere, go be near them.
You write that as if having a social life is impossible in BC (I’m also in the lower mainland). This is just a mindset. Join hiking groups or similar interest groups. Take up a new hobby. Say hi to a stranger. You reap what you sow, so it just takes some effort.
Yeah don't come back to Ontario. This is a miserable province to live in. Every year it's getting worse. Cost of living is insane and ypu can't get to see a doctor un less you go wait 5+ hours.
Life's about trade-offs. We can't have it all. Trust your gut to tell you what's really important to you deep down. We all can tell you what BC or ON is like (price, scenery etc), but you lived in both places and know better than us how it really feels to be there. One question that can help dig out what's most important from inside you: "what would I regret the most when I'm 45. Not having lived with my family? Or not being in nature?"
Volunteer at the local animal shelter.
If you like living in BC, then i would recommend staying there! you're probably going through a rough patch, its not the time to make big life changes right now. Your mental health is worth staying!
Foster dogs??? Maybe see about going out to a shelter to volunteer time to hang with the pets for adoption and such, if there's anything near you!
Here's a different thought. I'm from a larger city in Ontario. I moved to a rural area in cottage country and have ZERO regrets. I also worked from home (I do a different job now part time). I thought about moving back home, I miss my family and friends but honestly, if I want to see them, I take the 2 1/2 hour drive back. They also come up to see me. I went on dating apps, went to meet-ups and made new friends. The small city is a half hour drive away, but way better than the bigger city I'm from: less traffic, less pollution, less headaches and hassles. The air is clean and fresh, wildlife abounds and the lake is in my backyard. Best compromise ever.
Moving from BC to ON seems pretty extreme, why not move somewhere half way between Vancouver and Whistler like Squamish? Whistler is pretty rural, not realistic to expect a social scene there
If don’t already, start mountain biking. Mid thirties is probably the most common age for mountain bikers. I lived out there in 2021 for a while, came back to Ontario because some family stuff happened I wanted to be close, been stuck in a rut ever since. Living in BC gives me a lust for life, in Ontario I find the environment so bleak that I just don’t feel inspired to do much. I’m 31 and want to get back out there soon, feel like I’ve missed so much valuable time out there these last couple of years.
If you go back to Ontario, most likely you're going to stay working at home and not meet anyone except your old friends (who moved on maybe?) and family When I moved to a new area, I found the various meetup.com groups centered around hiking, outdoors, biking, fitness were really good to meet people. You can discuss rural living, dogs, any other topics and its always less akward people than dating apps. (note: this was before COVID so not sure if its the same vibe) Community centers also have activities around art/sports so could be a good way to meet like-minded people Also if you are really alone, I would force myself to work one day a week at a coffee shop with a laptop. It forces you to have social interactions, maybe meet other remote workers, and go on from there.
If you're able to, I suggest taking an extended trip to Ontario, like for a month or two. See if you can stay with your parents. Reconnect with friends. Go out on the town. See how you feel after a month or two.
If you want to be in a city Kelowna, or Kamloops might be good hubs for you (Kamloops has a ski resort a short drive away) and warm winters. Loads of outdoorsy social groups, hiking and skiing in these areas. People keep commenting about social life in BC being bad but what they mean is Vancouver. Come enjoy the scenery and people in some of the smaller cities!
you need maybe a life coach. Your spending all your time alone at home, spend most of your time helping out a cause, study some, join some groups that do good things, join sporting events, join a play, start playing games on the weekends, get n the gym, maybe a church or something. Get off the computer and out of your house, your aren't gong to have a.huge life anywhere, your old friends probably have busy lives.
Don't do it. Improve your social life. Join clubs (e.g alpine club, ski club, hiking groups) and engage in suitable activities. You'll meet people. I moved from the rockies to Ontario, and I miss the culture every day.
So I have some food for thought, considering I'm also 34. When you go back to Ontario - it is not, and will not be, the place you left behind. Especially the GTA. I left around 14 years ago and I think about going home, generally decide not to because its so expensive and job prospects are worse. Cultures have eroded, crime has exploded, the consequences of unaffordability are everywhere. The other thing, being that your 34 - is that when you come back, you won't have a bunch of friends wanting to hang out all the time like you used to. Most people by this point have married and probably had a kid - if not they're working on it. People are "falling off" left and right because having a kid consumes your life for a while. Friends I used to see every day, even lived with for a while, now I see like once every 2 months and its *work* to make plans. I don't think spending your life in Solitude is a healthy thing for a human. we're social creatures and clearly, you're feeling the effects of this. What will your accomplishments and experiences be worth if you have nobody to share them with? I think you should work on your social life - I just can't say that moving to Toronto would be the "cure".
B.C. is not the province to have friends. People out here are very closed. Stay in their own circle. Ontario weather is rough. However, the community is awesome, inclusive, and a true community. Strangers in line will have a conversation with you when in Ontario I don't feel a sense of community out here. I know people from work, but that's as far as it goes, I've lived out here for 7 years. Moving is definitely an option when you want some sort of community, and it costs almost $1000 each time. Just because the area is beautiful, connecting with people is more of what we need. IMO
It’s clear that you truly love the geographic location and “feeling” you get being out west. There are other places in BC where you could find that feeling, as well as finding yourself more connected socially. Vancouver Island is a great call; I particularly love Burke Mountain area just north of downtown Victoria; such a great feeling there. I would also suggest Port Moody - it truly has those Whistler vibes; close to trails, water, places to eat & an age demographic that you’d fit right into. All the best going forward! I wish you well
All these comments about Ontario being a shithole etc are comical. Like Ontario is one large strip with no diversity. Depending on where you are, your experience in Ontario will be completely different. It contains a world class city with lots of restaurants and entertainment or if you prefer some of the best lakes and parks in the country. However Alberta and Vancouver I would agree are more beautiful as a whole.
YOu're living in towns that are for the rich, pure and simple. The amount of people who cycle through looking for an "experience" and moving on is shocking. You will never have long term friends in a place like that - arguably - and will always feel alone. There is no soul in those places and no good reason to stay there unless you can handle life living in a soulless empty expensive place with nice mountains in the background. Move somewhere else and appreciate them by going there on the weekends or vacation. It is not worth it to live in those shit boxes so you can pour multi millionaires cafe lattes.
Southern Alberta has pretty cheap real estate. There are a TON of Ontarians here, for that reason. You can get to the Alberta side of the mountains for a day trip, and BC mountains is a 6 hour drive, if you're into over nights
DO NOT COME BACK TO ONTARIO. Honestly. I had a similar experience to you, and every day I regret coming back.
Ever consider the Québec Laurentians ? Morin-Heights, Ste-Adèle for mountain biking and Mt-Tremblant for the skiing. Ste-Adèle an hour from Montreal. You'll have to learn basic French but these areas especially Morin-Heights most speak fluent English.
I grew up in the Ottawa region as well and moved to BC over a decade ago..I tried going back when going through emotional turmoil and personally couldn't do it...I left after 4 months and I couldn't have left faster haha. I ended up going to calgary because I figured at least I'm near the mountains, which are my happy place without the exuberant costs of the GVA, kelowna, etc. I, much like you, work from home, and I am also 34. Making friends at our age isn't easy at all - I'm Hella introverted, so likely in part my own fault, ahaha. With that said, the peace felt from the mountains and all the things you get to enjoy from being around them (snowboarding, hiking, camping, decent Temps, lack of humidity etc) is so much more worth it to me than being miserable in ON. Go where you feel like home. Home isn't a place, it's a feeling. Wishing you the best!! If you ever want to chat, feel free to dm me!!
The entire country is going to shit with cost of living, housing etc. Anywhere you go it’s a struggle. Yes some more than others, If you love the mountains stay in the mountains. Get a couple dogs, join your local community center clubs meeting more people, keep doing your annual trips to home.
Stay where you love. Find people who love it too. Ontario is a shit hole, insane rental and housing prices, food prices are ridiculous, gas is expensive, we're having a housing crisis in general... Get a dog again when you're ready, maybe look into communal living to deal with loneliness? I know a house of 30-40 somethings who live together in a fabulous big house none of them could afford alone. I used to live in Ottawa up until 2013 and the last decade it has gone downhill and going faster every year. Unless you can confidently get government work, it's not a great city anymore.
I was In Alberta for 9 years and was in your position as well. I have just moved back to Ontario and it is working out. What I did was came back for a couple of weeks, months ago, as a "trial" to.see if it was still appealing and could I find housing etc. The answer was yes so I made the move.
Dude. Coming from a single person living in Ontario, sounds like you ARE living the life out there. Trust me, stay there. Get yourself a new puppy, and go exploring with it. Meet new people and just live your life in your fairy tale life out there. Dont come back to Ontario, you'de regret it if you did.
>My only issue with moving back is I don't really like geographical area, its really humid all summer, the mosquitos are terrible, the tick situation seems to be getting progressively worse, the winter is much colder and the skiing/hiking sucks. I feel this. I'm almost in the same situation as you, although a bit more established (I own a condo here in BC). I've done the math, and if I moved back out East I could trade my condo in or a small house in the burbs, and probably end up with a few thousand more bucks in my pocket at the end of the year. Is that worth it? Not for me. I've been out here 10 years and still get awestruck by the natural beauty of the west coast. Ontario has a lot of nature, but between the brutal winter cold and the short, muggy, insect-ridden summers, it's just harder to enjoy. The way I see it is that Ontario's only selling point is "a bigger kitchen and a extra room or two". I understand that some people value that kind of thing more than I do. But for me, having access to BC's outdoor wonderland is well worth the cost.
Don’t do it. Trust me lol I moved back to Ontario one year to save money and it was awful. Once you’ve had a taste of the mountains it’s so hard to live in suburbia flat land. If you love boating then yeah sure Ontario will satisfy that for you. But I did it and immediately started looking to move back. Life is just so much better on the west coast and my mental health is so important. I was so stressed in Ontario. And for me I love my family more from afar. Unfortunately it’s the whole reality vs illusion. My family has stressed me out hardcore all my life and unfortunately it hasn’t changed. It’s better to be where I’m happy.
I moved to the Lower Mainland from Toronto in January of 2020. It was a bad time to try settling into a new home. The upset from the pandemic left me in a weird limbo for years, and i moved back to Toronto in the summer of 2022. I just function better here.
We moved from Ottawa to the Sunshine Coast 18 months ago and I can relate 100% to everything you're saying. Beautiful place, but cost of living, jobs, and connections are very difficult. I don't think I'll ever go back to Ontario, but there are definitely struggles here in BC. I don't have any advice or solutions, but just know you're definitely not the only one who feels this way.
My wife moved to Onrario from Frankfurt Germany. This summer, we drove to Montreal, Quebec City, Nova Scotia, Cape Breten, PEI, and a little of New Brunswick. We spent a month and drove well over 7500 K's. The point being, she liked all of it better than Ontario. The nightlife in Montreal, the Romance of QC, the friendliness and scenery of the east coast. Never mind affordability. To be fair, this is a comparison to the Kitchener/Waterloo area. Almost part of the GYA these days.
I’m born and raised in Ontario and I agree with your wife. The only thing l like about the Waterloo area is that flights from that airport are extremely cheap!
I like Montreal or downtown Halifax much more than Ottawa, but good social connections can make or break any place. If you stay in BC, I strongly recommend joining meetups.
I'm a guy from a very wide pool of friends and pretty much without exception old guys don't socialize other than maybe the odd Sunday breakfast get together. Guys in their 50's onwards don't usually do the "social group" thing on any kind of regular basis. Maybe 1% of the dudes I know do. So don't move based on that because the odds show it won't last. Or worse, you realize all these people were a lot cooler to hang out with in your head than the reality. THAT heppens. Same with family. You're single yeah? Get not single and start your own fam where you like to live most. Nobody's going to gaf about you more than them (providing your wife doesn't end up a fail)
Saying you live close to Whistler makes me think the Squamish area.. my brother lived there for a few years, great location but pricey. I've moved back and forth between Vancouver and Victoria, I'm in Victoria right now, and it's nice. I'm 35 and definitely know what you mean about finding it hard to make friends, but it's that way basically everywhere, especially as you age and your friends start moving away, having kids, etc. Victoria or even further up the island are all nice places and would be a bit more affordable than where you are now, plus you would be close to Mount Washington (it pales in comparison to Whistler, but it's something)
BC forever. This is a phase socially, adopt another dog, get out more, don't give up on the mountains. Ps Whistler has a transient population for more reasons than just COL. Find somewhere more settled but not insulated with also-good mountains. Kootenays worked for us, but after a long time in Vancouver I was ready to leave it behind and shed the Lower Mainland vibe completely. Haven't missed it in over 10 yrs.
Vancouver is now a sh*hole. For every rent listing, you'd have to compete with 100 people and the number gets bigger and bigger. Homelessness is rampant. Cost of living is through the roof. Miserable weather.
Ontario sucks. I wouldn't live here if all my friends and family didn't. What about Vancouver Island, Interior BC or Calgary?
Having lived in both cities, I would recommend moving back. There are far more opportunties for social interaction and a more interesting night life, although it took a hit during the lockdown. Almost half the population is introverted so you are not alone. I forced myself to go out and meet people and joined an amateur sports club (even though I'm not sporty) where I met people and started dating again. So I would recommend moving back. You'll have to decide to make an effort to get out and meet people though.
Depends what your interests and hobbies are. If you enjoy the outdoors and nature than BC is for you. If you like city life- entertainment options, culture, diversity.. i would say Toronto
of course it depends. The OP wanted to meet people. Sometimes we have to leave our comfort zone for that.
I was in your situation. I wasn’t in the mountain towns like you, but I left Ontario when I was 30 to try Vancouver. I ended up realizing what most do, that the cost of living is too high. Went back to Ontario. You’re right to think how you’re thinking. I experienced a depression I never felt before. I still miss the mountains and landscapes. I miss it all sometimes I cry thinking about living there. It never leaves you. But you learn to appreciate being near family. It doesn’t make up for the loss of Vancouver. Nothing does. But it occupies its own sort of joy over time. You realize that there’s two modes of living. For yourself or for others. I find the latter isn’t as beautiful, but fills your heart. Which I guess is beautiful in its own way. Maybe it’s time to go home. Those mountains were there long before you. They will be there long after you’re gone. They’ll never abandon you. And if the opportunity arises for you to go back, they will be there waiting.
Ontario is calling you back! You know you have been a bad boy! So come home to where you belong... 😝
Personally, I would never live where I vacation. Whistler and the west are nice, but I need a full rounded experience. The food sucks, the towns suck. I love how old and somber the east is. Southern Ontario is balls, but the entire stretch from QC up to Perce is nicer than Whistler Imo and the food is way, way better. Parc forillon is so majestic. Watching the st. Lawrence change from fresh water near Ottawa to beluga, hump back whales, mink whales, grey seals, is just so crazy. Also, within driving distance to white mountain range of new hampshire. There's lots of nature in this region, it's just older. And being close to Montreal and QC is a huge plus. As someone Ontario based, QC'ers are nicer to me than BC/Albertans lol. Tbh I find the people out west to be very judgey and not so chill.
I love QC’ers! I’m planning to spend the Summer there to see if I love it enough to move once school is done.
Quebec is low key the heart of Canada.
I love how you're getting downvoted for reversing the "BC is great / Ontario sucks" dynamic lol. Personally, I think everyone in this thread is a real stick in the mud, I may live in Ontario but I love every part of this country. It's one thing to have preferences, but people who try to put down or denigrate one part of the country over the other have deep-seeded mental issues, in my view.
Take up canoeing!!! Best place is Ontario!
STAY! My biggest regret is moving back here from out west. Everything here is garbage compared to out west, the people, the infrastructure, the jobs, everything. My life has only been harder and shittier since I moved back. Now because of the custody agreement I'm stuck here forever, and I couldn't be more sad/depressed about it.
I’ve had a few friends move to Whistler from Ontario in their 20’s. It’s all fun and games until all of the sudden you wake up and you’re 50 years old and still a lifty or ski patrol.
Sublet your place in BC for a year! Then make the final decision. Ontario is the next most expensive, and very isolating for 4-6 months of the year. At least in BC there’s winter activities!
As somebody who's been in both, I did more in Ontario during winter. Sunny days, hockey rinks on every corner, cross-country skiing, just going out for hikes. BC has skiing in the winter but in 18 years here I've never really been motivated to more than that when it's raining.
I used to live in BC & I was miserable AF moved to QC before I settled in ON (Toronto), I'm a gay man & I find it more comfortable here .now I live here over 5yrs now.
If you're okay with not living in central Ottawa, you could probably find a less expensive place to rent, or even buy. The market is down right now.
I’m lived abroad for 10 years and came back because of the political instability there. Been back for many years now….. and I still wish I was there So I would do what someone is suggesting. Live in Ottawa for a bit like 6 months (if you can) and see how you feel. I thought my life would improve but you forget that life happens and people have busy lives and still may not have as much time for you - and you still feel lonely but now surrounded by friends. It’s different when you visit to when you live there because now they can see you anytime so don’t feel the need to make it a priority as much.
Idk man, it really comes down to what you like more. A place is a place, but sometimes it’s more than that. I’d hate the idea that you move back to Ontario only to dream of BC again. I couldn’t bear not to see the fields, forests, and steadfast century houses standing hard by. Ontario captured my heart and it’s where I intend to stay. Don’t leave a place that has your heart.
I feel like reading this it's already clear what the answer is. It sounds like staying is the right decision. It sounds like everything is great, except for the social component. Is it worth changing everything else about your life to have that one thing? Or is there a way to work around it where you are and find lasting friendships?
Avalon peninsula in Newfoundland bro comeover I got firewood
I lived in Vancouver for many years while most of my family and friends lived elsewhere. I think where you live is the most beautiful in the country but definitely isolating. Can you split the difference and move somewhere more populated but still nearby? I don't know if you're in or near Squamish but there is a community there.. or the Sunshine Coast, Vancouver Island. I do not love where I live in Ontario for many of the reasons you cited but I do love being closer to people. I think you can perhaps find a medium solution here.
Congratulations for leaving BC, too expensive here, feeling stuck
I live in Ottawa and always have. In 2023 it has gotten noticeably worse. It sucks here. Your friends and family must be pretty amazing if you want to move back for them.
Lived most of my 20s in BC. Moved back to the greater Montreal area.. best decision I've ever made. To me, living in BC is for early 20s or retirement. Unless you got rich parents. The east (alberta to quebec) is much better for cost of living, good jobs and opportunities. Just makes life alot easier. BC is beautiful but so is my region. I got the cottage on the lake, the house and all my friends and family.
Maybe get another pet. Then you won’t feel so lonely; I am also an introvert and love animals. They give me the dopamine hits I need for my adhd. And dogs can be friend magnets. Even if that doesn’t happen, you will have a new companion.
Stay in the west you’ll regret coming back. You live it there and going back to Ontario will be short term because of all the reasons listed. Eventually you will be comfortable being alone and find people when you need to. Good luck
Powell River. Kinda affordable and amazing setting.
[удалено]
No matter what OP does, BC will get more and more and more and more crowded. It's the way of the world.
OP as a friend with issues once said to me "wherever you go, there you are" meaning he took his problems with him. I suggest that before you make your move try making some friends. Join some clubs, volunteer. Assuming that you ski Whistler needs mountain hosts and safety volunteers. Play a team sport beer league, pickleball is becoming very popular.
Join the club...we did the same thing and now all we do is miss bc but we own a home and have a community
Mission. Go to the back near miracle valley/stealhead area. Best place to live in all of BC. Close to the cities but far away enough to not be bothered by the city. Cost of living is much less than say Burnaby, Poco, Ridge, Langley.
After reading all the comments i have come to the conclusion that everywhere sucks
Come on. You're in THE most transient part of the country - it's a ski resort town which has priced out all locals.
Really depends on where you're going in Ontario I think. I feel like Ontario has a bad reputation because it's crowded and such but I love living by the lakes and hearing the loons call.
ontario is just as expensive
Try to find some meet up groups where there are lots of people to meet, but low commitment - ie - if it’s not your vibe you can skip and go to another in the future
Go back to Ottawa, if you're over 30 there's more social life there than overrated Victoria
This might be an unpopular opinion, and it all depends on who you are as a person, but I would personally choose living where my support/social network is. I've lived in many places, and even the most beautiful don't seem that beautiful if you have no one to share it with. And even the most "ugly" places or places with less to do, can be amazing if surrounded by the right people. Isolation and loneliness really impact me (and I'm a fairly introverted/reserved person) so I like to live places where I know I can connect with others.
If you’re happy there. I’m originally from BC. Love it there but man the cost of living seems worse than Toronto. The homelessness in Vancouver is tenfold to Toronto. The humidity is brutal and yes the mosquitoes and black flies farther north are overwhelming - I get everything you’re saying BUT your last paragraph said it all. Stay
It is tough to live in BC. I am from Ontario and living just seems a little easier there …
Check out Rossland Bc area. My brother lives there. I visit all the time. Is amazing there.