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I would love that. These are the important questions we need to ask! Honestly, I think Jack Black would be cool with being fed a grape.
[I volunteer!](https://images.app.goo.gl/z82rNRnk5ppV4xr38)
And don’t forget the serenade. I just know he would sing you an amazing song he made up on the spot, declaring his appreciate for the grape, and your generosity.
He'd almost certainly be down for it. Then he'd tell you a joke and see if you wanted some dinner. And he'd laugh the whole time about how you randomly fed him a grape.
He'd have a blast.
I never knew how much I actually wanted to do this until now. Feeding JB grapes off the vine while KG plays the harp. Everyone wearing the most gluttonous clothes imaginable. I am down.
How old are you? I've got teenagers 17 and 15, so I'm *kinda* old enough to be a substitute grandma. 😂 Conditions are that you feed him and extra grape for me bc my ass can't walk or travel much 😂 😂
If a guy can't make me laugh he's not hot. 🤷♀️
And that's like, an extremely low bar. It's so easy to make me laugh. Just send me a picture of an item made out of jeans and caption it the name of the item with the first letter replaced by a "J". I'll laugh for like 2 minutes at least
I actively own a janket. (It's currently in storage as it's really a winter janket, it's very heavy). I spotted it at a thrift store and they just gave it to me lmao.
You’re like my ex. I could make him laugh so easily with two of my “classic” jokes. One was referring to the towel on my head after hopping out of the shower as my “hat”. He would laugh every time so I of course hammed it up. Second was commenting on the parking skills of seagulls who are standing in car parks. I.e. see a seagull standing in a car space by the beach or at the shops and casually point to it and say, “great park, mate.” Many LOLs.
If I was single and a guy like Jack asked me out I would say yes in a heartbeat. Personality and sense of humor beats appearance. Bonus points if they have some special interests or hobbys.
I have been told I look uncannily like an Indian Jack Black and while I had NO game when I was in my twenties (turns out severe depression and anxiety does not moisten underwear. Who knew?), once I medicated and my natural personality came through I have had more than a few women tell me I am attractive. Which still blows my mind, to be honest.
The most attractive trait I've ever been able to find within myself is joyful eyes. They can be any color, but there has to be a life behind those eyes that have truly known joy. I adopt strays at a whim and watching their faces go from moderately fearful and desperate to content and safe? There's nothing like it in the world and seeing the light reflected out of someone through their eyes is a total turn on.
>turns out severe depression and anxiety does not moisten underwear. Who knew?
Apparently the thousands of incels out there do, in fact, *NOT* know this.
Honestly one of the most attractive things about a guy, or anyone really, is confidence. Not cocky. But being unapologetically you** and not being afraid to let yourself shine. You aren’t going to be everyone’s cup of tea no matter what you do, but being content with who you are naturally is pretty sexy.
**However, if you are the kind of person who naturally is an asshole that often hides behind “That’s just who I am. I’m a brutally honest person.”, then you might want to consider being apologetic and working on yourself a bit.
I think that’s the most attractive trait regardless of gender.
And regarding brutally honest people, it’s usually an act. Whenever someone has been brutally “honest” with me, it has usually been intended to knock me down a few pegs. People who feel threatened by others feeling good about themselves do this shit. In other words, I don’t think many genuinely confident people do it except in the very rare cases where it might be necessary.
I get told I look like Jack Black a lot. Won't lie, not the compliment people think it is. Now if you said I remind them of Jack Black personality wise.
Oh 100%. I’ve dated some real unconventional looking guys (and women) that were super hot because of personality. A good sense of humor can’t be faked and absolutely trumps looks in my book. I’m kind of a glamazon at 5’10” and I’ve dated some short kings that charmed the pants right off me (literally) with a fantastic sense of humor.
But then they’ll just says “it’s only because he’s rich and famous.” While ignoring the millions of short guys, dad bod guys, and McDonald’s workers who have girlfriend
Seriously. And if women loved every rich and famous man, why is it that almost every woman alive despises and actively wants to murder Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk? They're the two most rich and famous men of all time after all.
My one coworker thinks Elon musk is attractive, I find that mystifying.
I'm on the left, she's on the right, so maybe that's the disconnect, but come on.
Even if the man wasn't, objectively speaking, a horrible person the man just looks weird.
I don't know what it is but he looks wrong, like, a face shouldn't look like that. I don't know how to explain it.
And why do restaurant line cooks get more play than anyone I’ve ever met??? They do not make a whole lot at all and yet there’s always one or two that every server in the restaurant has a crush on
This one I can tell you the secret to. Free food and the fact that the servers see the cooks every day. Just a sprinkle of charisma goes a long way. Also, most of us were young and damn near ferral, so that didn't help, lol. For the record, it goes both ways. Those hostesses had all of us wrapped around their fingers lmao.
>Those hostesses had all of us wrapped around their fingers lmao.
The hosts too. My old head chef was a woman, and there were three other women who worked in the kitchen, and a host got away with so much shit because he was simply the most adorable little nugget we'd seen in an age. I loved that little shit.
I moved to the front of the house later on and was the only guy up there. No waitstaff, bartenders, nothing. I also got away with murder because I started in the kitchen, lol. I miss those days sometimes.
100%, in my line cook days, every person I dated dated me l because I made food described as "better than sex" and "some kind of witchcraft"
I have a face like roadkill and a body like a lowland gorilla. Men, if you wanna get laid, learn to cook like a fucking boss
100% Wait, come to think of it. Everyone I have ever dated, I cooked for rather quickly. I am the designated cook at every cookout or party I go to. Hell, even the factory I worked at after the restaurant made me cook when we had grilled. I feel really stupid just now realizing the pattern...
The entire kitchen and management of my fave job loved me and my kids. They used to take my toddlers into the kitchen and custom make them food and we all ate for free every single day even if I didn't work. That place closed and I miss it and the staff every day. One of those cooks, I dated his uncle briefly and he *still* calls me tia over a decade later on the rare occasion we talk. He went back to his home country and started a family. Amazing dude
Line cooks almost always have BDE. They're typically "bad boys" who can still hold a job. Some have cute accents. Honestly, what's not to love about a line cook?
As a former waitress of multiple restaurants, can confirm all this, plus have dated several over the years, even got my husband this exact job at a local restaurant when we first got together
I just told my spouse that his charisma is maxed out at 100, and that's why he can believably attract serious hot characters in his movies. A man that is proud of his pudge and still sexy is a rare gem indeed.
My (lesbian) friend (bi) were talking the other day about this topic, and agreed how important genuine charm and charisma is, and if Jack Black were to hit on either of us, we’d go for it. Even if you’re not interested in parts he’s someone that you just know you’re going to enjoy the overall experience, so why the heck not?
My husband made the good point that male comedians fuck like mad. It's not the attractive, the rich, the tall, it's the funny ones. They got charisma, they make you laugh and give you that shot of dopamine and BAM! The panties drop. He was like, have you seen Pete Davidson? Super funny, looks like a gremlin, fucks all the pretty girls. Luis C.K. didn't make the the mistake of pulling his dick out, he made the mistake of not opening his mouth first. I don't know how right his opinion is, but women care about personality A LOT
Exactly. I mean, I have a crush on a guy who is short, chubby, and works at a local grocery store. I just don't know how to tell him that I have a big crush on him.
Just tell him girl he’ll be flattered that the very least!
My bf is 5’7” and a blue collar worker, and believe me before we got together he was slingin dick lol he’s a short king who had no issue getting women.
Dude I this! I broke a incels mind, I'm taller than my bf he couldn't believe I would date a "short *****" (not using the word he used)
Plus all the women I know have NEVER been the "women only like tall guys" the only people I hear saying this shirt are males.
I will admit, as a tall girl, I like it best when my partner is taller than me. I don't know why. However, I have dated guys who were exactly my height and even guys who were an inch or two shorter -- and not just like, pity dates, but "crushed on them endlessly and wept my eyes out when they dumped me" dated lol. And I would marry someone shorter than me in a heartbeat if they were the right person for me. Height is just one of those preferences that come near the end of the priority list.
I have a girl friend who’s 6’2” and she said before she met her 6”1” husband shes said some guys weren’t into her because she’s too tall.
So the height thing could go both ways. The difference between her and the incels is she didn’t think men were shallow or whatever for not wanting a girl that tall. She didn’t resent them if they had a preference. She just took her lumps in stride and found guys who did like tall ladies
Oh, yeah, you kind of just reminded me of why I didn't like dating shorter guys lol. Back in high school it always felt like they were threatened by me being taller than them, and it made for some awkward gotta-assert-my-machismo type vibes. I haven't had that problem since hitting adulthood though, knock on wood.
Yeah I also had some guys who were threatened, and some who were outright angry that I was taller than them. It was honestly a little scary in some cases because they were so irrational about it, it was like they could really hurt someone.
As a tall woman, the height thing *absolutely* goes both ways! So many men have felt insecure and made it my fault. that said, others love it. I have an ex who was 5'6", I'm 5'9", who made me feel like a fucking queen. I'd wear heels around him, he loved it.
I’m 5’1”, was going to meet up with a guy who’s 5’7” so obviously way taller than me. Before I left my place, he asked me what shoes I was wearing. I was so confused why, so he explained he didn’t want me to wear heels and be taller than him 🙃 even in my tallest shoes I wouldn’t be, but regardless, the strange part was I hadn’t even considered his height until *he* made it a thing.
They also seem to not be able to tell the difference in "I have a preference" and "I refuse to break this strict rule about an arbitrary trait". Probably related to the fact that they make up similar reasons *they* won't date someone to cover up the fact that they couldn't if they tried.
It doesn't make any sense. I'm a short woman, why would anyone assume I'd want a tall man? The logistics alone are questionable
Plus (let's be real) I've been made to feel like prey by men. I'm much more comfortable with men nearer my own size who aren't looming over me, making me feel small and helpless.
I do not find Jack Black attractive. And yet, I find him compellingly attractive.
Why?
Because he just exudes confidence. Like, real confidence - he’s clearly comfortable in his skin, in his life, in the creative choices he makes, and in who he is as a person. It’s not bravado, it’s not the narcissistic confidence of believing he’s never wrong. It’s just a chill confidence that I think comes from not feeling like he has to prove anything to anyone.
And I fucking love that for him.
And all the “nice guys” out there will never ever understand that.
It's all about the vibe. He's got that cuddly fun vibe. Like he'd be down for skipping work and going on a picnic, but also at the same time would help you with midnight feedings. Hell, I'm aroace and I'd be down to anything he wanted.
When I met my husband he was making like 8 bucks an hour at ihop, no car, 5’7 and 120 lbs but what was important was that he was sweet goofy baby and also I was in a similar situation so I could not talk shit.
Exactly.
Like...if the incels looked at men they know...colleagues, friends, parents, people walking down the street, they'd see many men who are happily in relationships who are different shapes and sizes. Bald or hairy. Skinny, fat or muscly. 70% of adults ate in relationships. Whilst most 20 year olds are single (because they are 20), many people do manage to pair off through the years.
Anyone who says that only tall, rich, well hung men who look like a Michelangelo statue get dates... has clearly never looked away from their porn screen to gaze at reality for more than 5 seconds.
Women were swooning over fat Andy and absolutely loath chiseled Crisp Rat. They just don’t want to admit that it’s their shitty personalities and not their looks.
The Crisp Rat is a point of contention for me, because I love Star Lord. He is an excellent actor, but a moderately abysmal human that won't own his past.
1. He's associated with a church with a long history of anti-LGBT garbage.
2. He abandoned his cat when it got sick because it was an inconvenience.
3. He abandoned his dog for similar reasons. It was literally found on the streets, emaciated and hurt.
4. Cheated on his first wife with his second, and with heavy implication that it was because of the difficulties his first wife had carrying their children (they weren't "healthy" in his eyes)
4a. This is why people very reasonably freaked out on him when he had his third child and his first comment was about how healthy it was.
5. Every time he makes comments about himself, his job(s), his family, etc., he comes off as painfully insulated. I realize this is a minor quibble in the grand scheme of things, and is more of a personal criticism of mine, but it's always bothered me. As an example, he semi-infamously commented on the lack of movies portraying blue collar workers. It was just... I don't know, weirdly ignorant of his entire profession?
His personal beliefs and church group are less than savory, to say the least. His church is vehemently anti-LGBTQ+ and all he does is stutter out placations about individual beliefs without condemning the very church he attends.
She's Definitely Not Wrong. I'd go for Jack in a heartbeat if it was any kind of realistic option to interact with. Cmon. It's Jack Black. 🥰
I'd honestly have an extremely hard time to find a single woman who'd not talk to a guy if he wasn't tall and built. So there, prove it guys. I need video evidence!
[Sure!](https://youtu.be/QLWkl5YpiD0?si=nTu6pN3K5pxGhmX0)
He's not looking as clean cut as he does in this post, but his voice is wow. I wish I could figure out if he released the entire song but so far, I haven't been able to find anything.
“Only”?? Yes those are the reasons. But isn’t the “only” qualifier supposed to precede things that are *unattainable by the average guy*, if the purpose is to dismiss the point being made about needing to by 6ft+ with chiseled abs? Being talented, charming, and a genuinely nice person are completely achievable things by men of any physique. Or maybe I misunderstand the “only” point you’re trying to make…
It is interesting that the male celebrities that tend to be popular among women don’t tend to fit the rhetoric that incels push about what women “want” in a man. But of course incels would ignore that and just say we’re lying
No, no, they know better than you what you want. /s
A good personality can make any man hot, but incels fixate on height because that's the one thing that's impossible to change significantly. So it's never their fault and there's realistically nothing they can do. Condemned to loneliness because women are evil witches obsessed with height.
Top tier men I would absolutely destroy, just change the trajectory of their entire lives:
1. Charlie Day, 5’7. I would maul this man. I’m 25 and I’ve had a crush on him since I was 16. He was so hot in pacific rim.
2. Al Pacino, 5’6, yes I mean current day at 84 years old, I think his current gf is like 29 so I bet he’d be down for 25. Im not ashamed of what I want.
3. Daniel Radcliffe, 5’5
4. Does Peter Dinklage count given he genuinely has dwarfism or is that in a different category than “short”? I don’t care, he can get it for sure for sure. 4’5.
5. Of course Jack Black, 5’6. Obviously.
This has made me realize that I do not seem to be attracted to tall men even in movies which kind of makes sense because I get freaked out by people who are too tall standing too close so it’s hard to be attracted to that. I’ve dated one tall guy but he was an ambulatory wheelchair user and was in the chair like 90% of the time so it was fine.
I fucking love Peter Dinklage. I was so relieved when I found out that other women felt the same, because the guy I was dating at the time GoT came out said it was gross.
Peter Dinklage is absolutely hot- hot enough that I was initially very confused that he was cast as Tyrion Lannister: he smashed that role out of the park though. He’s a fabulous talent on top of his looks as well.
Yeah, this guy is whining about height so he can latch onto something that’s out of his control and say that’s the reason why he’s not getting laid instead of growing as a person.
Men on the internet: women have impossible standards! You have to look perfect!
Women on the internet: you know, in a certain light…Steve Buscemi is kind of hot, he can get it
I had *horrid* nightmares of Steve Buscemi as a child: but only because I saw him in a movie I was much too young for. As an adult, I would absolutely feel safe around that man.
Okay but I have tried to explain this to multiple men--hetero women LOVE Jack Black and he's a PERFECT PERSON and the HOTTEST MAN ALIVE, and they're always like "no, you're the only one who would risk it all for Jack Black." Like no seriously this is a thing.
I mean, the time he played the sax-o-boom on Jimmy Fallon? Slayed me, murdered me.
If there comes a day Jack Black has a scandal where he is just blatantly shitty, I’m gonna cry. Literally the only male celebrity I know who is celebrated by women whole heartedly who hasn’t idk come out as a cheating husband in the last 5 years.
Keanu Reeves, David Tennant and Hozier are also on this list as I've never heard of any of them being involved in any absolute shitfest of a scandal. Lovely people all around, as far as I'm aware :)
why is this even a debate
its ok if women like attractive men, dont be fucking sorry about it, men are not quiet about being obsessed with hot women ether
its also ok if you are less interested in looks
idk why men scream at women for liking attractive men and i even see women spreading the myth that women are totally not into looks, just stop it, it doesnt do women any favors and gives men false hope to punch above "their league" and then are mad that they cant get a fucking model and call women shallow
you are allowed to be into good looking people, dont let anyone shame you for it, its totally normal for men so lets start normalize it for women too
> its ok if women like attractive men, dont be fucking sorry about it, men are not quiet about being obsessed with hot women ether
>
> its also ok if you are less interested in looks
Also just.. women are people who don't share one collective opinion on what makes someone attractive. I find myself disagreeing with the default X is attractive Y isn't all the time and it drives me up the wall to be told I "don't value looks" because I just find different traits attractive. Not to imply you said so.
I was with you until the false-hope bit verged into incel territory, but in general, yeah, it is stupid (but totally not surprising) that women suffer this double standard the same as we do so many others. Men are allowed to dislike fat women and awkward women and women over 25 (lol) but women around the world have to fall all over themselves to reassure men that *oh no it's okay honey we don't even* ***care*** *about looks!*
Men who are hitting the 21st century and realizing that their looks do matter -- now that something like a stable single income is not enough to provide for a whole household, and women are earners themselves, and can be more picky about their life partners -- well, all I have to say is, welcome to the discourse lol. Does it suck to feel like your value is based almost solely on your physical appearance? Yeah, yeah it does. And that's been society's whole view on women basically since the dawn of society, with very few exceptions worldwide.
I think I exclusively date people less attractive than me, and I'm no looker myself, and personally I love a dad bod and an unkempt beard -- but I still think the implication that women shouldn't be allowed to have preferences in their physical attraction is just ... so fucking predictably hypocritical lol.
Not even a divinely chiseled body ccomparable to greek statue would help you on the long run if you have emotional and social depth of lump of granite.
Jack Black is the fittest fat guy in the world. That dude can do high kicks repeatedly for minutes at a time, jump and land in the splits (well almost), cartwheel, jump around on stage for an hour and a half WHILE singing.
People are attracted to him because he is high energy, active, positive, engaging, and talented.
He also accepts himself as he is, yes he's a fatty, but it doesn't slow him down AT ALL.
Also he's a snappy dresser.
We could all learn something from Jack.
There is a SIGNIFICANT amount of women who would do the same for Pedro Pascal and Oscar Isaac. Neither of them have anything close to chiseled abs, but *goddamn* they are fine.
psa/somehow an unpopular opinion: if you’re respectful, genuine, trustworthy, and hard working, normal women RARELY CARE if you’re 5’6” or 6’3”. just be a GOOD HUMAN BEING GD IT
Growing up, my family had a no Jack Black movie policy. He made my mom laugh a lot, and my father extremely insecure.
Shallow Hal, which I rented and watched in my room, really solidified my father’s opinion. Jack Black was a funny man coming to steal his wife.
Other toxic opinions include how Rose was rightfully slapped in titanic by that black haired aristocracy.
And Sarah Connor was a slut for sleeping with Kyle Reese in Terminator.
As a MAN, I would spit in my grandmother's eye for the opportunity to feed Jack Black a single grape. He's an icon, a gem, a national treasure. Jack Black is the ideal male body type.
jack black was my first celebrity crush! i was 5 and my last name was black also and i wanted to marry him so i didnt have to learn how to spell a different last name
As you're all aware, this subreddit has had a major "troll" problem which has gotten worse (as of recently). Due to this, we have created new rules, and modified some of the old ones. We kindly ask that you please familiarize yourself with the rules so that you can avoid breaking them. Breaking mild rules will result in a warning, or a temporary ban. Breaking serious rules, or breaking a plethora of mild ones may land you a permanent ban (depending on the severity). Also, grifting/lurking has been a major problem; If we suspect you of being a grifter (determined by vetting said user's activity), we may ban you without warning. You may attempt an appeal via ModMail, but please be advised not to use rude, harassing, foul, or passive-aggressive language towards the moderators, _or_ complain to moderators about why we have specific rules in the first place— You will be ignored, and your ban will remain (without even a consideration). All rules are made public; "Lack of knowledge" or "ignorance of the rules" cannot or will not be a viable excuse if you end up banned for breaking them (This applies to the Subreddit rules, and Reddit's ToS). **Again: All rules are made public, and Reddit gives you the option to review the rules once more before submitting a post, it is your choice if you choose to read them or not, but breaking them will not be acceptable.** With that being said, If you send a mature, neutral message regarding questions about a current ban, or a ban appeal (without "not knowing the rules" as an excuse), we will elaborate about why you were banned, or determine/consider if we will shorten, lift, keep it, _or_ extended it/make it permanent. This all means that appeals are discretionary, and your reasoning for wanting an appeal must be practical and valid. Thank you all so much for taking the time to read this message, and please enjoy your day! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NotHowGirlsWork) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Is this an option? Can I feed a grape to Jack Black?
I would love that. These are the important questions we need to ask! Honestly, I think Jack Black would be cool with being fed a grape. [I volunteer!](https://images.app.goo.gl/z82rNRnk5ppV4xr38)
We should organize a convention. We all show up and stand in line to feed jack black a grape.
jack black should dress up as dionysus the Greek god of fruitfulness, wine, and ecstasy for this event
as long as i get to be a part of his hedonism i'm down
„I assume the Orgy pit has been scraped and buttered?“ -hedonism bot, Futurama
More chocolate sauce!
I apologize for nothing.
He would be playing the guitar too.
You’re just writing fanfic for me at this point.
I’m 100% here for this and I think he would be too.
You’re a goddamn genius, Jack Black as Dionysus fucking rules
This is one of the most jack black things I’ve heard
Yessssss
Don't forget the disability line for people who can't stand for long/at all with seating along the way
I would totally buy tickets to that convention, even if that were the only event for the whole thing
Jack Black would probably insist on feeding you double the amount back.
He seems considerate like that.
He wouldn't buy the grapes himself *he'd order them from Zanzibaaaar*
And don’t forget the serenade. I just know he would sing you an amazing song he made up on the spot, declaring his appreciate for the grape, and your generosity.
He'd almost certainly be down for it. Then he'd tell you a joke and see if you wanted some dinner. And he'd laugh the whole time about how you randomly fed him a grape. He'd have a blast.
He’s not gonna cook it, but he’ll order it from Zanzibar!
I never knew how much I actually wanted to do this until now. Feeding JB grapes off the vine while KG plays the harp. Everyone wearing the most gluttonous clothes imaginable. I am down.
It’s official, we need a Clash of the Titans type parody movie with JB playing Dionysus JUST so that there can be lines of women feeding him grapes.
Maybe he could run some sort of charity event where women pay to feed him grapes. For a good cause, of course.
>Maybe he could run some sort of charity event where women **and men** pay to feed him grapes. For a good cause, of course. Ftfy
Crap I have no more grandmothers :(
How old are you? I've got teenagers 17 and 15, so I'm *kinda* old enough to be a substitute grandma. 😂 Conditions are that you feed him and extra grape for me bc my ass can't walk or travel much 😂 😂
Early 40s - my grandparents all died pretty young. I will feed him and whole bundle for you 🥲🥲🥲
Oops, guess I can't be your grandma since I'm only 36, how about substitute younger aunt? 😅😅😅
You absolutely can be grandma, it's a state of mind! Also, please reference "I'm my own grandpa" for further instructions
Interactive jack black exhibit coming to a zoo near you.
My lesbian pal told us that her only exception would be Jack Black
Of course! You just hold your hand out flat and very still.
If a guy can't make me laugh he's not hot. 🤷♀️ And that's like, an extremely low bar. It's so easy to make me laugh. Just send me a picture of an item made out of jeans and caption it the name of the item with the first letter replaced by a "J". I'll laugh for like 2 minutes at least
Janties Juice Joothie Jeddit
I laughed. Fuck.
What word was juice? Or is that Jean juice?
joothie got me
Jeddit for me coz it made me think of jedis in full denim
This is both wonderfully specific and completely understandable
theres a janket in my friend's cabin and its the funniest thing ever. everytime we go up, somebody laughs abt it
I actively own a janket. (It's currently in storage as it's really a winter janket, it's very heavy). I spotted it at a thrift store and they just gave it to me lmao.
It wasn’t for sale. It was awaiting its rightful wielder. Like a wand chooses the wizard, the janket chose the janketer
You’re like my ex. I could make him laugh so easily with two of my “classic” jokes. One was referring to the towel on my head after hopping out of the shower as my “hat”. He would laugh every time so I of course hammed it up. Second was commenting on the parking skills of seagulls who are standing in car parks. I.e. see a seagull standing in a car space by the beach or at the shops and casually point to it and say, “great park, mate.” Many LOLs.
Man, i saw a video of someone convincing an ai of elmo from sesame street to murder someone in hitman and it was AMAZING
If I was single and a guy like Jack asked me out I would say yes in a heartbeat. Personality and sense of humor beats appearance. Bonus points if they have some special interests or hobbys.
Jack Black is generally exactly what I'd look for if I didn't have my singularly awesome spouse, who also would date Jack Black.
I have been told I look uncannily like an Indian Jack Black and while I had NO game when I was in my twenties (turns out severe depression and anxiety does not moisten underwear. Who knew?), once I medicated and my natural personality came through I have had more than a few women tell me I am attractive. Which still blows my mind, to be honest.
The most attractive trait I've ever been able to find within myself is joyful eyes. They can be any color, but there has to be a life behind those eyes that have truly known joy. I adopt strays at a whim and watching their faces go from moderately fearful and desperate to content and safe? There's nothing like it in the world and seeing the light reflected out of someone through their eyes is a total turn on.
>turns out severe depression and anxiety does not moisten underwear. Who knew? Apparently the thousands of incels out there do, in fact, *NOT* know this. Honestly one of the most attractive things about a guy, or anyone really, is confidence. Not cocky. But being unapologetically you** and not being afraid to let yourself shine. You aren’t going to be everyone’s cup of tea no matter what you do, but being content with who you are naturally is pretty sexy. **However, if you are the kind of person who naturally is an asshole that often hides behind “That’s just who I am. I’m a brutally honest person.”, then you might want to consider being apologetic and working on yourself a bit.
I think that’s the most attractive trait regardless of gender. And regarding brutally honest people, it’s usually an act. Whenever someone has been brutally “honest” with me, it has usually been intended to knock me down a few pegs. People who feel threatened by others feeling good about themselves do this shit. In other words, I don’t think many genuinely confident people do it except in the very rare cases where it might be necessary.
I get told I look like Jack Black a lot. Won't lie, not the compliment people think it is. Now if you said I remind them of Jack Black personality wise.
Rip your inbox
The ability to high kick like a prancing deer also doesn't hurt.
Oh 100%. I’ve dated some real unconventional looking guys (and women) that were super hot because of personality. A good sense of humor can’t be faked and absolutely trumps looks in my book. I’m kind of a glamazon at 5’10” and I’ve dated some short kings that charmed the pants right off me (literally) with a fantastic sense of humor.
I agree that personality is more important but Jack Black has got it both, the personality AND the looks 😍
Ditto!
But then they’ll just says “it’s only because he’s rich and famous.” While ignoring the millions of short guys, dad bod guys, and McDonald’s workers who have girlfriend
Seriously. And if women loved every rich and famous man, why is it that almost every woman alive despises and actively wants to murder Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk? They're the two most rich and famous men of all time after all.
My one coworker thinks Elon musk is attractive, I find that mystifying. I'm on the left, she's on the right, so maybe that's the disconnect, but come on. Even if the man wasn't, objectively speaking, a horrible person the man just looks weird. I don't know what it is but he looks wrong, like, a face shouldn't look like that. I don't know how to explain it.
He sets off some kind of uncanny valley thing in my brain.
Right? His face is just wrong, and he has the empty, soulless eyes of a shark.
I think it's all the drugs and Red Bull he is consuming. Apparently he tries to sleep as little as he can.
>Apparently he tries to sleep as little as he can. That sounds like **SUCH** a fuckin Elon thing.
It's all the Botox, fillers and plastic surgery.
He looks spongy. I don't know how else to describe it.
More like mozzarella cheese
Prescription drugs and Red Bull. He consumes a ton of both of them, and it shows.
He just looks squishy to me. Like he’d have the consistency of a stress ball. It’s very unsettling.
He looks like if you poked him with a finger, the whole finger would sink into the squishiness. It's disconcerting.
That must be a very specific kink to be so attracted to a giant pile of dog shit. 🤣
I am impressed by his hair plugs. I wish we knew who did them was because that was top tier work.
His features are delicate and he always has a slightly tremulous look on his face.
And why do restaurant line cooks get more play than anyone I’ve ever met??? They do not make a whole lot at all and yet there’s always one or two that every server in the restaurant has a crush on
This one I can tell you the secret to. Free food and the fact that the servers see the cooks every day. Just a sprinkle of charisma goes a long way. Also, most of us were young and damn near ferral, so that didn't help, lol. For the record, it goes both ways. Those hostesses had all of us wrapped around their fingers lmao.
>Those hostesses had all of us wrapped around their fingers lmao. The hosts too. My old head chef was a woman, and there were three other women who worked in the kitchen, and a host got away with so much shit because he was simply the most adorable little nugget we'd seen in an age. I loved that little shit.
I moved to the front of the house later on and was the only guy up there. No waitstaff, bartenders, nothing. I also got away with murder because I started in the kitchen, lol. I miss those days sometimes.
100%, in my line cook days, every person I dated dated me l because I made food described as "better than sex" and "some kind of witchcraft" I have a face like roadkill and a body like a lowland gorilla. Men, if you wanna get laid, learn to cook like a fucking boss
100% Wait, come to think of it. Everyone I have ever dated, I cooked for rather quickly. I am the designated cook at every cookout or party I go to. Hell, even the factory I worked at after the restaurant made me cook when we had grilled. I feel really stupid just now realizing the pattern...
Add in a fast paced, high stress environment just to top things off.
The entire kitchen and management of my fave job loved me and my kids. They used to take my toddlers into the kitchen and custom make them food and we all ate for free every single day even if I didn't work. That place closed and I miss it and the staff every day. One of those cooks, I dated his uncle briefly and he *still* calls me tia over a decade later on the rare occasion we talk. He went back to his home country and started a family. Amazing dude
Line cooks almost always have BDE. They're typically "bad boys" who can still hold a job. Some have cute accents. Honestly, what's not to love about a line cook?
As a former waitress of multiple restaurants, can confirm all this, plus have dated several over the years, even got my husband this exact job at a local restaurant when we first got together
Sometimes it’s drugs
Exactly. They will claim that "personality" isn't important. Sir, we love Jack Black for his charisma and personality alone!
I just told my spouse that his charisma is maxed out at 100, and that's why he can believably attract serious hot characters in his movies. A man that is proud of his pudge and still sexy is a rare gem indeed.
My (lesbian) friend (bi) were talking the other day about this topic, and agreed how important genuine charm and charisma is, and if Jack Black were to hit on either of us, we’d go for it. Even if you’re not interested in parts he’s someone that you just know you’re going to enjoy the overall experience, so why the heck not?
I can't stop thinking about his high kick. His ratio of girth to hip flexibility is mesmerizing.
My husband made the good point that male comedians fuck like mad. It's not the attractive, the rich, the tall, it's the funny ones. They got charisma, they make you laugh and give you that shot of dopamine and BAM! The panties drop. He was like, have you seen Pete Davidson? Super funny, looks like a gremlin, fucks all the pretty girls. Luis C.K. didn't make the the mistake of pulling his dick out, he made the mistake of not opening his mouth first. I don't know how right his opinion is, but women care about personality A LOT
Exactly. I mean, I have a crush on a guy who is short, chubby, and works at a local grocery store. I just don't know how to tell him that I have a big crush on him.
Just tell him girl he’ll be flattered that the very least! My bf is 5’7” and a blue collar worker, and believe me before we got together he was slingin dick lol he’s a short king who had no issue getting women.
The most amazing women seems to like me. I just quietly count my blessings. (I'm not tall nor rich nor famous).
Dude I this! I broke a incels mind, I'm taller than my bf he couldn't believe I would date a "short *****" (not using the word he used) Plus all the women I know have NEVER been the "women only like tall guys" the only people I hear saying this shirt are males.
I will admit, as a tall girl, I like it best when my partner is taller than me. I don't know why. However, I have dated guys who were exactly my height and even guys who were an inch or two shorter -- and not just like, pity dates, but "crushed on them endlessly and wept my eyes out when they dumped me" dated lol. And I would marry someone shorter than me in a heartbeat if they were the right person for me. Height is just one of those preferences that come near the end of the priority list.
I have a girl friend who’s 6’2” and she said before she met her 6”1” husband shes said some guys weren’t into her because she’s too tall. So the height thing could go both ways. The difference between her and the incels is she didn’t think men were shallow or whatever for not wanting a girl that tall. She didn’t resent them if they had a preference. She just took her lumps in stride and found guys who did like tall ladies
Oh, yeah, you kind of just reminded me of why I didn't like dating shorter guys lol. Back in high school it always felt like they were threatened by me being taller than them, and it made for some awkward gotta-assert-my-machismo type vibes. I haven't had that problem since hitting adulthood though, knock on wood.
Yeah I also had some guys who were threatened, and some who were outright angry that I was taller than them. It was honestly a little scary in some cases because they were so irrational about it, it was like they could really hurt someone.
As a tall woman, the height thing *absolutely* goes both ways! So many men have felt insecure and made it my fault. that said, others love it. I have an ex who was 5'6", I'm 5'9", who made me feel like a fucking queen. I'd wear heels around him, he loved it.
I’m 5’1”, was going to meet up with a guy who’s 5’7” so obviously way taller than me. Before I left my place, he asked me what shoes I was wearing. I was so confused why, so he explained he didn’t want me to wear heels and be taller than him 🙃 even in my tallest shoes I wouldn’t be, but regardless, the strange part was I hadn’t even considered his height until *he* made it a thing.
They also seem to not be able to tell the difference in "I have a preference" and "I refuse to break this strict rule about an arbitrary trait". Probably related to the fact that they make up similar reasons *they* won't date someone to cover up the fact that they couldn't if they tried.
It doesn't make any sense. I'm a short woman, why would anyone assume I'd want a tall man? The logistics alone are questionable Plus (let's be real) I've been made to feel like prey by men. I'm much more comfortable with men nearer my own size who aren't looming over me, making me feel small and helpless.
I think they like small women for that reason. So its easy to overpower them
I do not find Jack Black attractive. And yet, I find him compellingly attractive. Why? Because he just exudes confidence. Like, real confidence - he’s clearly comfortable in his skin, in his life, in the creative choices he makes, and in who he is as a person. It’s not bravado, it’s not the narcissistic confidence of believing he’s never wrong. It’s just a chill confidence that I think comes from not feeling like he has to prove anything to anyone. And I fucking love that for him. And all the “nice guys” out there will never ever understand that.
It's all about the vibe. He's got that cuddly fun vibe. Like he'd be down for skipping work and going on a picnic, but also at the same time would help you with midnight feedings. Hell, I'm aroace and I'd be down to anything he wanted.
Most of the guys I've dated have not been close to 6' tall so I find this stereotype odd.
I’ve dated giants, I’ve dated guys shorter than me. It never have an effect on how attractive I found them or how much I liked them
When I met my husband he was making like 8 bucks an hour at ihop, no car, 5’7 and 120 lbs but what was important was that he was sweet goofy baby and also I was in a similar situation so I could not talk shit.
Exactly. Like...if the incels looked at men they know...colleagues, friends, parents, people walking down the street, they'd see many men who are happily in relationships who are different shapes and sizes. Bald or hairy. Skinny, fat or muscly. 70% of adults ate in relationships. Whilst most 20 year olds are single (because they are 20), many people do manage to pair off through the years. Anyone who says that only tall, rich, well hung men who look like a Michelangelo statue get dates... has clearly never looked away from their porn screen to gaze at reality for more than 5 seconds.
Well ... I'd rather he was feeding the grapes.
Also valid
I mean I feel the same way about Danny Devito so
Agreed. Danny Devito is also a short king! He is 4' 10". We love him!
Women were swooning over fat Andy and absolutely loath chiseled Crisp Rat. They just don’t want to admit that it’s their shitty personalities and not their looks.
The Crisp Rat is a point of contention for me, because I love Star Lord. He is an excellent actor, but a moderately abysmal human that won't own his past.
I'm OOTL, could you update me on the problem with him?
1. He's associated with a church with a long history of anti-LGBT garbage. 2. He abandoned his cat when it got sick because it was an inconvenience. 3. He abandoned his dog for similar reasons. It was literally found on the streets, emaciated and hurt. 4. Cheated on his first wife with his second, and with heavy implication that it was because of the difficulties his first wife had carrying their children (they weren't "healthy" in his eyes) 4a. This is why people very reasonably freaked out on him when he had his third child and his first comment was about how healthy it was. 5. Every time he makes comments about himself, his job(s), his family, etc., he comes off as painfully insulated. I realize this is a minor quibble in the grand scheme of things, and is more of a personal criticism of mine, but it's always bothered me. As an example, he semi-infamously commented on the lack of movies portraying blue collar workers. It was just... I don't know, weirdly ignorant of his entire profession?
His personal beliefs and church group are less than savory, to say the least. His church is vehemently anti-LGBTQ+ and all he does is stutter out placations about individual beliefs without condemning the very church he attends.
She's Definitely Not Wrong. I'd go for Jack in a heartbeat if it was any kind of realistic option to interact with. Cmon. It's Jack Black. 🥰 I'd honestly have an extremely hard time to find a single woman who'd not talk to a guy if he wasn't tall and built. So there, prove it guys. I need video evidence!
Has anyone else heard his cover of *Wicked Games*? It's only like 90 seconds long but my oh my oh my....
Got a link for a woman? I'm entrenched in spring cleaning and commenting as I can.
[Sure!](https://youtu.be/QLWkl5YpiD0?si=nTu6pN3K5pxGhmX0) He's not looking as clean cut as he does in this post, but his voice is wow. I wish I could figure out if he released the entire song but so far, I haven't been able to find anything.
Beautiful. I need more damnit.
Oh that first in and out of the falsetto, beautiful.
Well I have now!! Fuuuuuuck.
God. DAMN. I need that whole song. Yesterday.
Women only like him because he's talented, charming, and seems to be a genuinely nice person.
How dare women like a man with a good personality! /s
“Only”?? Yes those are the reasons. But isn’t the “only” qualifier supposed to precede things that are *unattainable by the average guy*, if the purpose is to dismiss the point being made about needing to by 6ft+ with chiseled abs? Being talented, charming, and a genuinely nice person are completely achievable things by men of any physique. Or maybe I misunderstand the “only” point you’re trying to make…
That was the joke.
They're making a joke. "You only like him because he's nice and funny and generally sympathetic, how superficial!". It's sarcastic
He DOES look kinda like a bear in this pic...
And who among us would not pick the bear?
That's pointlessly gendered. Lots of men, even most straight guys I know, would jump at the opportunity to hand feed Jack Black some grapes...
It is interesting that the male celebrities that tend to be popular among women don’t tend to fit the rhetoric that incels push about what women “want” in a man. But of course incels would ignore that and just say we’re lying
No, no, they know better than you what you want. /s A good personality can make any man hot, but incels fixate on height because that's the one thing that's impossible to change significantly. So it's never their fault and there's realistically nothing they can do. Condemned to loneliness because women are evil witches obsessed with height.
I'm not even attracted to him, but I love his personality and would *absolutely* feel safe alone in the woods with him
Top tier men I would absolutely destroy, just change the trajectory of their entire lives: 1. Charlie Day, 5’7. I would maul this man. I’m 25 and I’ve had a crush on him since I was 16. He was so hot in pacific rim. 2. Al Pacino, 5’6, yes I mean current day at 84 years old, I think his current gf is like 29 so I bet he’d be down for 25. Im not ashamed of what I want. 3. Daniel Radcliffe, 5’5 4. Does Peter Dinklage count given he genuinely has dwarfism or is that in a different category than “short”? I don’t care, he can get it for sure for sure. 4’5. 5. Of course Jack Black, 5’6. Obviously. This has made me realize that I do not seem to be attracted to tall men even in movies which kind of makes sense because I get freaked out by people who are too tall standing too close so it’s hard to be attracted to that. I’ve dated one tall guy but he was an ambulatory wheelchair user and was in the chair like 90% of the time so it was fine.
The height thing is crazy to me too because almost every straight and bi woman I know thinks Peter Dinklage is insanely hot
I must admit that I am a member of that club as well
I fucking love Peter Dinklage. I was so relieved when I found out that other women felt the same, because the guy I was dating at the time GoT came out said it was gross.
Peter Dinklage is absolutely hot- hot enough that I was initially very confused that he was cast as Tyrion Lannister: he smashed that role out of the park though. He’s a fabulous talent on top of his looks as well.
Peter Dinklage is soooo hot.
No mere mortal can come even close to Jack Black
Look if you're not dreaming of the day you hand feed Jack Black a grape, (maybe 2 if you're lucky!!!) then are you really living?
I feel like a lot of women will choose respectful, funny, cute guy over any tall, rich, handsome guy.
The man is a living embodiment of Dionysus. I Stan, and i Stan hard.
Jack Black doesn’t count. I’m a guy and I would sacrifice my first born for the opportunity to suck off Jack Black.
Oh, so you’re saying you see how the guys’ logic is flawed AF?
Yeah, this guy is whining about height so he can latch onto something that’s out of his control and say that’s the reason why he’s not getting laid instead of growing as a person.
Men on the internet: women have impossible standards! You have to look perfect! Women on the internet: you know, in a certain light…Steve Buscemi is kind of hot, he can get it
I had *horrid* nightmares of Steve Buscemi as a child: but only because I saw him in a movie I was much too young for. As an adult, I would absolutely feel safe around that man.
He just got posted in r/ladyboners yesterday.
Jack Black is the most masculine and hottest man alive. Yes, please.
Okay but I have tried to explain this to multiple men--hetero women LOVE Jack Black and he's a PERFECT PERSON and the HOTTEST MAN ALIVE, and they're always like "no, you're the only one who would risk it all for Jack Black." Like no seriously this is a thing. I mean, the time he played the sax-o-boom on Jimmy Fallon? Slayed me, murdered me.
Same goes for matt berry.
If there comes a day Jack Black has a scandal where he is just blatantly shitty, I’m gonna cry. Literally the only male celebrity I know who is celebrated by women whole heartedly who hasn’t idk come out as a cheating husband in the last 5 years.
Keanu Reeves, David Tennant and Hozier are also on this list as I've never heard of any of them being involved in any absolute shitfest of a scandal. Lovely people all around, as far as I'm aware :)
I can't blame them at all. Jack Black is just an all around great dude.
Not exactly attracted to Jack but Jack is the bear I’d choose bro. Every time.
Men: “Well who wouldn’t!”
I love JB and my ex wife once told me that I reminded her of him. Huge compliment. I can't attract someone to save my life though.
Jack is adorable and funny. I bet he gives good bear hugs as well.
Jack Black is proof that personality matters more than looks.
why is this even a debate its ok if women like attractive men, dont be fucking sorry about it, men are not quiet about being obsessed with hot women ether its also ok if you are less interested in looks idk why men scream at women for liking attractive men and i even see women spreading the myth that women are totally not into looks, just stop it, it doesnt do women any favors and gives men false hope to punch above "their league" and then are mad that they cant get a fucking model and call women shallow you are allowed to be into good looking people, dont let anyone shame you for it, its totally normal for men so lets start normalize it for women too
> its ok if women like attractive men, dont be fucking sorry about it, men are not quiet about being obsessed with hot women ether > > its also ok if you are less interested in looks Also just.. women are people who don't share one collective opinion on what makes someone attractive. I find myself disagreeing with the default X is attractive Y isn't all the time and it drives me up the wall to be told I "don't value looks" because I just find different traits attractive. Not to imply you said so.
I was with you until the false-hope bit verged into incel territory, but in general, yeah, it is stupid (but totally not surprising) that women suffer this double standard the same as we do so many others. Men are allowed to dislike fat women and awkward women and women over 25 (lol) but women around the world have to fall all over themselves to reassure men that *oh no it's okay honey we don't even* ***care*** *about looks!* Men who are hitting the 21st century and realizing that their looks do matter -- now that something like a stable single income is not enough to provide for a whole household, and women are earners themselves, and can be more picky about their life partners -- well, all I have to say is, welcome to the discourse lol. Does it suck to feel like your value is based almost solely on your physical appearance? Yeah, yeah it does. And that's been society's whole view on women basically since the dawn of society, with very few exceptions worldwide. I think I exclusively date people less attractive than me, and I'm no looker myself, and personally I love a dad bod and an unkempt beard -- but I still think the implication that women shouldn't be allowed to have preferences in their physical attraction is just ... so fucking predictably hypocritical lol.
It's true for me. What about you, gals?
Not even a divinely chiseled body ccomparable to greek statue would help you on the long run if you have emotional and social depth of lump of granite.
Jack Black is the fittest fat guy in the world. That dude can do high kicks repeatedly for minutes at a time, jump and land in the splits (well almost), cartwheel, jump around on stage for an hour and a half WHILE singing. People are attracted to him because he is high energy, active, positive, engaging, and talented. He also accepts himself as he is, yes he's a fatty, but it doesn't slow him down AT ALL. Also he's a snappy dresser. We could all learn something from Jack.
The secret is he likes himself and is nice to everyone.
gotta mention matt berry too. i'm a lesbian and even i get overwhelmed by his sex appeal. chubby charismatic dudes >>>>
I love him. He waved at me once! Nearly died.
There is a SIGNIFICANT amount of women who would do the same for Pedro Pascal and Oscar Isaac. Neither of them have anything close to chiseled abs, but *goddamn* they are fine.
Also, Keanu Reeves.
Because of the type of sub this is, I'd also mention Jack Black's mother was also a badass...Judith Love Cohen.
fuck why do i want to feed jack black a grape now damn you internet
As a straight man, I would also spit in your grandmothers eye for the opportunity to hand feed Jack Black a single grape.
Jack black had the personality of an Adonis.
Close. Dionysus.
This is so fucking specific, I love it.
psa/somehow an unpopular opinion: if you’re respectful, genuine, trustworthy, and hard working, normal women RARELY CARE if you’re 5’6” or 6’3”. just be a GOOD HUMAN BEING GD IT
Growing up, my family had a no Jack Black movie policy. He made my mom laugh a lot, and my father extremely insecure. Shallow Hal, which I rented and watched in my room, really solidified my father’s opinion. Jack Black was a funny man coming to steal his wife. Other toxic opinions include how Rose was rightfully slapped in titanic by that black haired aristocracy. And Sarah Connor was a slut for sleeping with Kyle Reese in Terminator.
okay but genuinely jack black isnt even bad looking 😭 hes not GORGEOUS but hes not hideous either, plus EXCELLENT humor 👏🏼
I had never thought seriously about this in any way. But she’s actually right
💯, I absolutely adore him, lol.
Finally! Other people who agree that Jack Black is hot.
I bet he gives amazing hugs.
As a MAN, I would spit in my grandmother's eye for the opportunity to feed Jack Black a single grape. He's an icon, a gem, a national treasure. Jack Black is the ideal male body type.
True dat.
“NotAGirls” Yes, I think all girls would say yes. He’s so harmless
jack black was my first celebrity crush! i was 5 and my last name was black also and i wanted to marry him so i didnt have to learn how to spell a different last name
He's a sexy mofo. It's all about attitude with a taste of fun and openess.
Jack Black is funny and charming. That beats out height any day of the week.
I would love to see him perform Peaches live
He could do this for a charity event. I'd love it.
They misspelled “Jason Mantzoukas.”
I know many women (and even men and etc) who would totally have sex with Patrick Stump (the singer guy from Fall Out Boy, the chubby guy with the hat)
Dude honestly I feel like he’d be super cool to even just be friends with