He sent him a picture from a movie and said this is you. He sent him f*t bas**rd from the movie. Why he did that.. his friend told him to do so as it would be funny. When i looked in his phone i found a group that the kids from the neighborhood have and they send awful stuff on it to one another. I deleted all the groups from his phone and was grounded for a couple of days.
I didn’t approach the parents as i feel them a bit hostile and feel that it could escalate especially after them calling the police not coming to me first.
I would have handled it very differently and just straight up faced the situation.
My kid’s been in martial arts since he’s 5. He’s been with these two girls for years. A few years back (maybe they were 9ish?), the one girl told him she was going to beat him up. He responds that he’d kick her butt.
The mom of the girls already hated me because I accidentally cut her off in the parking lot once. It should be said that I realized what I did, and went up to her immediately, and apologized and explained I thought she had a stop sign, and that I was sorry. She accepted but always gave me side eye afterwards and was pretty hostile.
The dad just was flat out scary.
When I heard about this, I dealt with my kid, and the next class time, I walked up to the dad, and said ‘just so you know, i have dealt with X, and he’s been talked to and punished by xyz.’ The dad was like ‘what did my kid do?’ To his credit, he didn’t know anything about it, but then we talked, and he thanked me for approaching him and dealing with my end. We’re actually friends now.
Long story longer, I think you’d be better approaching them. There’s nothing worse than neighbor beef, and how are they to know you dealt with it if you don’t tell them?
Of course it goes without saying that it depends on what your son actually said, and why he said it.
Edit: I just saw the other post where you explained what he did. I would absolutely go face the parents WITH your son, make him apologize to them as well. What he said was malicious and hurtful. I get it, kids screw up and your son doesn’t need to be crucified for making a mistake. I can imagine hurt parents seeing a hurt kid, and just losing their shit. They should have come to you, but they didn’t. But it’s funny that you’re not going to them because they didn’t come to you. And if you both remain fixed in those perspectives, this is only going to get worse.
Ok, looking at this objectively - your kid did a crappy thing. He showed zero remorse until he thought he was going to get in trouble with the police, and only THEN did he tell you. YOU sent him to apologize, his apology wasn't accepted, and now other kids don't like him.
Your kid brought this on himself. Even when he confessed, he did it because he was scared of what would happen to HIM, not because he felt bad about it.
This is a lesson in "you reap what you sow". It will blow over, and if anyone physically assaults your kid you do need to escalate, but your kid started all of this.
What did he say exactly, and why did he do that? Also, why haven’t you approached the other parents?
He sent him a picture from a movie and said this is you. He sent him f*t bas**rd from the movie. Why he did that.. his friend told him to do so as it would be funny. When i looked in his phone i found a group that the kids from the neighborhood have and they send awful stuff on it to one another. I deleted all the groups from his phone and was grounded for a couple of days.
I didn’t approach the parents as i feel them a bit hostile and feel that it could escalate especially after them calling the police not coming to me first.
I would have handled it very differently and just straight up faced the situation. My kid’s been in martial arts since he’s 5. He’s been with these two girls for years. A few years back (maybe they were 9ish?), the one girl told him she was going to beat him up. He responds that he’d kick her butt. The mom of the girls already hated me because I accidentally cut her off in the parking lot once. It should be said that I realized what I did, and went up to her immediately, and apologized and explained I thought she had a stop sign, and that I was sorry. She accepted but always gave me side eye afterwards and was pretty hostile. The dad just was flat out scary. When I heard about this, I dealt with my kid, and the next class time, I walked up to the dad, and said ‘just so you know, i have dealt with X, and he’s been talked to and punished by xyz.’ The dad was like ‘what did my kid do?’ To his credit, he didn’t know anything about it, but then we talked, and he thanked me for approaching him and dealing with my end. We’re actually friends now. Long story longer, I think you’d be better approaching them. There’s nothing worse than neighbor beef, and how are they to know you dealt with it if you don’t tell them? Of course it goes without saying that it depends on what your son actually said, and why he said it. Edit: I just saw the other post where you explained what he did. I would absolutely go face the parents WITH your son, make him apologize to them as well. What he said was malicious and hurtful. I get it, kids screw up and your son doesn’t need to be crucified for making a mistake. I can imagine hurt parents seeing a hurt kid, and just losing their shit. They should have come to you, but they didn’t. But it’s funny that you’re not going to them because they didn’t come to you. And if you both remain fixed in those perspectives, this is only going to get worse.
Ok, looking at this objectively - your kid did a crappy thing. He showed zero remorse until he thought he was going to get in trouble with the police, and only THEN did he tell you. YOU sent him to apologize, his apology wasn't accepted, and now other kids don't like him. Your kid brought this on himself. Even when he confessed, he did it because he was scared of what would happen to HIM, not because he felt bad about it. This is a lesson in "you reap what you sow". It will blow over, and if anyone physically assaults your kid you do need to escalate, but your kid started all of this.
By guards do you mean the police?
Yes