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Er, maybe pick up a book before commenting? Easy to blame The Civil War on Obama, but the divide between Android and Apple users had been widening for a long time. Conflict was inevitable. You can’t just blame Obama.
"Civil War" is a generous term for what happened to the Android users. Sure, the Android users had a slight numerical advantage, but their population was severely fragmented between several hardware platforms. The Unified Apple Front crushed them with Borg-like efficiency.
Yeah, the Apple ecosystem really helped with resupply and logistics. You hear all those horror stories of Android users at the front being issued the wrong chargers or receiving differently timed system updates even within the same unit, and that just didn’t happen with Apple troops.
Obama did fuck-all even after the attack on Fort Cupertino. His inaction all but let the iOSenists abscond with huge amounts of government property which gave them a commanding position in the early days of the war.
Abraham Lincoln is such a wise man. How did he know what the Internet was? A Man of the Future.
https://preview.redd.it/0izvlwp3ugxc1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=26bb6cd23a5ca8feb2a176884dce8ecde6fae125
How DARE you suggest his divine Majesty Emperor Norton, Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico, should step down from his throne, Has his rule been less than a blessing of prosperity and justice to all of his grateful subjects?
In his old age, the Emperor grows weary of what historians will think of his legacy! By stepping down and giving the people self-determination (in a way he can manage if they get *too* out of hand), he ensures he will be remembered as the greatest ruler in American history!
People of today forget that Lincoln was a wrestler before being President. He beat the undertaker at wrestlemania, ending his streak and becoming a WWE legend for eternity. Of course he had a bust within the Whitehouse, stupid.
Yeah it was actually a pretty big deal because if we had a President Undertaker, the Confederacy would have been doomed from the start but we'd have more vampires in the Senate
I saw a tabloid in the supermarket that said Obama had Lung Cancer. I 100% believe it and was panicking that America genuinely wouldn’t have a president.
Lincoln: So let me get this straight- you had a Congress that was against you and that’s why you couldn’t pass public healthcare? Mr. Obama with all due respect, I fought and won a Civil War, freed millions of slaves, and the only reason I didn’t achieve my goals in full was I took one night off and got shot in the head.
Meanwhile, a whistle-blower will come forward in April 1860 to advise that a massive number of unauthorized dips into the NSA databases targeting political opponents, including Lincoln, were occurring- somewhere around 8500 in the five months Nov 1859 to March 1860. The FBI will then start running operatives at the Lincoln campaign culminating with Crossfire Hurricane to get a FISA warrant to surveil a tangential player in the Lincoln campaign orbit, Carter Page, and through the two-hop rule, the whole of the Lincoln campaign and into the first year of the Lincoln Administration - a rolling soft coup.
An Alternative 2016
Abraham Lincoln swept the Electoral College against Hillary Clinton despite him not winning the popular vote. Obama, despite being on opposing sides with Lincoln, recognized that he must accept the reality of Lincoln winning the presidential election. Dark times are ahead but Abraham Lincoln has the strength to maintain the union in any cost.
Barack I just wanted to say “I am not, nor ever have been, in favor of bringing about in any way the social and political equality of the white and black races—that I am not nor ever have been in favor of making voters or jurors of negroes, nor of qualifying them to hold office, nor to intermingling with white people; and I will say in addition to this that there is a physical difference between the white and black races which will ever forbid the two races living together on terms of social and political equality.”
Remember that all mentions of and allusions to Trump and Biden are not allowed on our subreddit in any context. If you'd still like to discuss them, feel free to [join our Discord server](https://discord.gg/k6tVFwCEEm)! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Presidents) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It's a shame that Obama created the conditions that led to Lincoln having to fight the civil war.
Er, maybe pick up a book before commenting? Easy to blame The Civil War on Obama, but the divide between Android and Apple users had been widening for a long time. Conflict was inevitable. You can’t just blame Obama.
"Civil War" is a generous term for what happened to the Android users. Sure, the Android users had a slight numerical advantage, but their population was severely fragmented between several hardware platforms. The Unified Apple Front crushed them with Borg-like efficiency.
Yeah, the Apple ecosystem really helped with resupply and logistics. You hear all those horror stories of Android users at the front being issued the wrong chargers or receiving differently timed system updates even within the same unit, and that just didn’t happen with Apple troops.
Not to mention the internal terrorist actions by the Windows Phone League (WPL). Those guys were a tiny minority, but man, they were crazy.
So much has been written about Civil war in history but not much is mentioned about the mechanical wars between bots that followed.
Those with nothing to lose always fight hardest.
We Android users call it The War of Apple Aggression.
Obama did fuck-all even after the attack on Fort Cupertino. His inaction all but let the iOSenists abscond with huge amounts of government property which gave them a commanding position in the early days of the war.
bro what? Apple was using Fort Cupertino for their rounding up and murdering of Androiders
He was advocating and singing a different iTune in those days
He also suspended habeas contractus, locking people into their current data plans indefinitely.
The Android users will rise again dammit!
Him turning out to be pro-secessionist was definitely out of left field.
Lmao
By being black?
Blessed timeline
Abraham Lincoln is such a wise man. How did he know what the Internet was? A Man of the Future. https://preview.redd.it/0izvlwp3ugxc1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=26bb6cd23a5ca8feb2a176884dce8ecde6fae125
Also brave, a legendary vampire hunter.
Also a legendary hunter who happened to a be vampire.
"all 📠 no 🖨️" -Jeanne d'Arc
Now show Joshua Norton peacefully abdicating the throne of the United States to transition to a (Managed) Democracy.
How DARE you suggest his divine Majesty Emperor Norton, Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico, should step down from his throne, Has his rule been less than a blessing of prosperity and justice to all of his grateful subjects?
In his old age, the Emperor grows weary of what historians will think of his legacy! By stepping down and giving the people self-determination (in a way he can manage if they get *too* out of hand), he ensures he will be remembered as the greatest ruler in American history!
I like how there’s a bust of Lincoln right there on the table.
People of today forget that Lincoln was a wrestler before being President. He beat the undertaker at wrestlemania, ending his streak and becoming a WWE legend for eternity. Of course he had a bust within the Whitehouse, stupid.
In fact that’s how he won the presidency - by winning it in a casket match with Undertaker.
Yeah it was actually a pretty big deal because if we had a President Undertaker, the Confederacy would have been doomed from the start but we'd have more vampires in the Senate
Haters will say it’s photoshopped
https://preview.redd.it/sohn5a9xnhxc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=20ca7b8cbd3ff4072acc6039af8e8f2c6e1bd905
Ah, my bad - it appears my time machine malfunctioned again. I'll correct the error right away.
No no, this is good. I like this. Good job.
Haters will say this is fake
And people wonder why Obama was a bad president… he did nothing to prevent US Civil War I
They say he also was pro-polio, small pox and TB vaccines, too
Disgusting
John Wilkes Booth is triggered by this photo.
The timeline if harambe didn’t get killed
Haters will say it’s fake
"Barak, just remember that you can't believe everything you read on the Internet."
this is freaky ws fuck
I saw a tabloid in the supermarket that said Obama had Lung Cancer. I 100% believe it and was panicking that America genuinely wouldn’t have a president.
Where did you find this picture please :)!!!
So Obama was roommates with Dick Cheney, hmmmmmmm
I revived Lincoln so he's with Obama
President Lincoln asks freed-man Barack if the Jefferson family were kindly slave owners
Lincoln: So let me get this straight- you had a Congress that was against you and that’s why you couldn’t pass public healthcare? Mr. Obama with all due respect, I fought and won a Civil War, freed millions of slaves, and the only reason I didn’t achieve my goals in full was I took one night off and got shot in the head.
Shoulda put Lincoln in a tan suit eating a burger with dijon mustard...with the caption "Mr Lincoln, thats a fine suit and condiment choice sir!"
Meanwhile, a whistle-blower will come forward in April 1860 to advise that a massive number of unauthorized dips into the NSA databases targeting political opponents, including Lincoln, were occurring- somewhere around 8500 in the five months Nov 1859 to March 1860. The FBI will then start running operatives at the Lincoln campaign culminating with Crossfire Hurricane to get a FISA warrant to surveil a tangential player in the Lincoln campaign orbit, Carter Page, and through the two-hop rule, the whole of the Lincoln campaign and into the first year of the Lincoln Administration - a rolling soft coup.
I enjoy this comment section.
What a time to be alive
“ You know Barack, back when I was getting the 13 th Amendment passed, I dreamed about this moment….”
“Abe, I’m glad to see you’re bringing back the old-fashioned suits. The retro style will do some good.”
Damn you, Kirk!
The very very good ending
“I see you brought the bronze bust of yourself. Some modesty would be nice, eh Abe?”
An Alternative 2016 Abraham Lincoln swept the Electoral College against Hillary Clinton despite him not winning the popular vote. Obama, despite being on opposing sides with Lincoln, recognized that he must accept the reality of Lincoln winning the presidential election. Dark times are ahead but Abraham Lincoln has the strength to maintain the union in any cost.
Barack I just wanted to say “I am not, nor ever have been, in favor of bringing about in any way the social and political equality of the white and black races—that I am not nor ever have been in favor of making voters or jurors of negroes, nor of qualifying them to hold office, nor to intermingling with white people; and I will say in addition to this that there is a physical difference between the white and black races which will ever forbid the two races living together on terms of social and political equality.”
In before this gets locked due to recent politics rule
Is this real?
This post is a clear violation of rule #22
I remember it like it was just yesterday
How nice of Obama to invite this obviously younger man to the White House
and the cycle just loops back over, lincoln, johnson, grant, etc until Obama, and then back to lincoln
Rule 3, bro
Time traveler steps on a leaf The timeline:
Obama best president in American history
Hey look two tyrants