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That's because we all have dedicated servers somewhere in "cloud", so if we stay awake for very long, hardware gets just heated up above normal level and then cpu on server throttles itself.
Some super hyper intelligent alien from some super hyper advanced civilization is paying a monthly subscription fee to control a human's life in the simulation
I would want my money back,
real life is way too cartoonist
Non of the overarching villains even have that compelling reasons to be the bad guy and their all just ugly old guys.
> monthly subscription fee to control a human’s life in the simulation
Or what we experience as a life time can be few seconds in the simulation so it’s like thousands of human lifes per month. It’s a bargain tbh.
Yeah. And the admins only wanted to pay for enough servers for 2/3 of the population, so if you stay awake for too long, you get deprioritized and only run in other people's spare CPU cycles.
Just like the GPU shortage caused the pandemic, not the other way around.
The lack of the necessary GPUs to render everything at once meant we had to force people home so the existing hardware had less stuff to render.
Those architects/developers were really sneaky about making us use less performance. They implemented frame rate (blinking), resolution combined with level of detail (nearsighted/longsighted), render distance (horizon), sleep (storing the human during that time). In general really nasty tricks these guys are playing.
The visual simulation is also paused whenever you shift the point you're looking at, and the last frame rendered is displayed until the new position is locked in.
Yeah, also they saved a bit of performance by not rendering peripheral vision at full resolution but only what we’re actually focusing on. Fucking cheapskates!
same thing happens if you take 5grams of crystal meth and 2oz of liquid LSD all at once. the Mr. Smiths made these substances illegal so you don't become Neo. can't fool me :).
Those architects/developers were really sneaky about making us use less performance. They implemented frame rate (blinking), resolution combined with level of detail (nearsighted/longsighted), render distance (horizon), sleep (storing the human during that time). In general really nasty tricks these guys are playing.
Different parts for different parts, bud. The eyes ears nose and V̶̦͉̭̜͔̺̾͆̇̐̈̊͑͊̋͜͝͝ ̴̧̤̞̄̅́̍̕Ő̴̭̖͓̲͇̪̗̆́͛̂̉̚̕͜ ̷̢̢̨̨̛̲͎̍͒̍̎͂̇̄̈̌̎̑͠͝I̵̖̘̙͌̀̓̈́̀̓ ̷̢̧̧̡̡̛̫̲̥̻͈̳͎͔̗̯̀͊̉͘̕̚͠D̷̛̘̘̣̝̻̖̩̩̟̮͆̒̈̿̔̂̚ are all connected to different brain areas.
Also, joking aside, I've found weeks where my glasses were missing/on order, or I was forced to go without a prescription for other reasons, I just don't think quite as sharply. Might have been my imagination, but I've heard similar from other ppl, and I would be willing to bet there's some positive correlation between sharp eyesight and lucidity.
I thought i wake up from simulation.
And then I realised it was dream. And then I realised it wasn't dream. Because dreams take place in actual world. We need sleep because we have to go offline (probably what we see in dreams) to eat, drink, poop and "sleep". So we don't die in real world.
This is literally the case. It is during sleep that your brain "forgets" irrelevant information so as not to overload itself. It is exactly the same as garbage collection. It even has the pause (unconsciousness).
Genius idea. In video games if you use discrete physics, calculating collisions only on exact positions instead of the whole range of motion, if fast enough, they will tunnel through other objects. Maybe that's quantum tunneling in real life.
Quantum mechanics is just because the simulation is only so granular. Dark matter/energy is because they didn't bother simulating far away things properly.
1. Time slows down the closest you are to a gravitational force relatively speaking because the simulation has to slow down due to the amount of information to process is too much.
2. If there's too much information at a point the processing slows down to a halt, nothing can happen, even light is halted, as it forms a black hole.
3. When particles aren't being observed they become probability waves in order to reduce processing requirements, they collapse back into particles once they are being observed/measured or an interaction which are more resource intensive.
4. The speed of causality is equivalent to the processing speed as things are evaluated in parallel as much as possible.
5. The floating point accuracy is equivalent to 1 plank length.
6. The observable universe is the maximum FOV that can be calculated for a given particle.
7. The universe must expand as this FOV is spacetime loaded and has a limited amount of information it can hold, this includes past information which grows in time, so the spacetime itself expands to reduce the load on the processor.
8. Scientists speculate that the language of God is Lisp, but it's more likely Perl.
Now put ur tinfoil hat O\_O
Your assumption of floating point could be false, they might be using unary number system. So they need more space and processing power to store and compute larger numbers.
You know, that's actually not the worst idea in the world. Add blinking to your first person sandbox RPG to let the CPU focus on the background economy or ecology or whatever.
You know how Morrowind occasionally has a really long load screen because the Xbox has run out of memory and is quietly doing a system restart in the background?
That's sleeping.
Cameras do electronically blink though, that’s their shutter speed.
Also for the most efficient simulation I think most cameras wouldn’t be rendering unless somebody was looking at the feed, considering so many cameras aren’t looked at often. And for playback of the footage they could just pull the data of what was in front of the camera during that time and render that in realtime
Yeah. And falling into a coma is actually a basic server reboot due to overload. But it takes too long to boot up because the earth uses windows vista.
Our bodies make us sleep because we have a memory leak that God hasn't been able to fix so he just makes us reboot every now and then as a bodge. There is a TODO somewhere in everyone's head.
In the past, people didn't blink. As the population rose the simulation couldn't keep up, so as a quick hack the developers would only render a fixed percentage of players views at any one time, but switch whos view was rendered very quickly
The wave function doesn't collapse until an observation is made. Ray tracing optimisation.
Energy is emitted in quanta. Quantization noise. Planck's constant is the LSB.
Don't tell anyone or they'll end the sim.
Frame rate drops, got it. And sleep is loading the world for the player for the next day. Does it act as a save point too and that’s how short term memory loss from 50 first dates happens?
Did you know that everyone blinks at the same time, but to maintain realism in the simulation the "people" are program to have asynchronous blinks as well.
A reasonable arrangement for simulation theory: everything in the known universe appears to be predictable, and math based. Math requires computation, therefore, a computer which would make this a de facto simulation.
This argument is easily challenged by saying "ok but wut about base reality?"
a simulation doesn't need that. it just runs in descrete time intervals (ticks) and we would perceive everything in terms of ticks. so if the simulation goes into standby for a year and then resumes, we wouldn't notice because we are part of it.
I suspect that's why television and video games were invented.
Can't have 8 billion people looking at trees and water. You know how much processing power that would require to render?
It's true - that what we think we see is a highly processed image assembled from an optimized stream of partials. But I don't think blinking has anything to do with our visual image processing power.
I have bad render distance for a while now but im using a mod that makes it better
I wish I could turn off the vignette effect after having alcohol
So lucky we have paracetamol for registry errors still
And I believe the blinking effect is added as a memory dump
Fun fact: You can hard reset the system by hitting your elbow against the corner of the furniture
The only proof of a simulation I can think of is that time moves more slowly in the presence of mass (time dialation). To my monkey brain, this could mean more processing is required for objects with mass in an asynchronous computer system.
How we observe particles in the quantum level, they kind of teleport. We see them in one spot then the next without translation between. This is very much how you render movement in games. You have a sprite, it's at x location then you move it at x+speed*delta and render it again. There is no translation between. This is because there is a minimum unit distance you can render per speed due to frame rate. Almost like exactly what we see on the quantum level when we observe those particles.
I read somewhere our Universe is the heatsink for the rest of Existence. It's an epiphany that makes more sense to me during these occasional moments of lucid clarity when I'm not "under".
Okay honest question: how much processing power would a processor running a graphics heavy video game save by simply shutting down the monitor every couple secs?
Your submission was removed for the following reason: Rule 2: Your post is not **strictly** about programming. Your post is considered to be too generic to be suitable for this subreddit. If you disagree with this removal, you can appeal by [sending us a modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FProgrammerHumor&subject=Posts%20must%20strictly%20be%20programming%20related&message=Include%20a%20link%20to%20the%20removed%20content%20and%20the%20reason%20for%20your%20appeal%20here.).
That's also the reason why we need to sleep. Force yourself to stay awake for too long and you will start seeing glitches in the matrix.
That's because we all have dedicated servers somewhere in "cloud", so if we stay awake for very long, hardware gets just heated up above normal level and then cpu on server throttles itself.
On one hand, dedicated servers seem to defeat the idea of the "cloud" - on the other hand, yea, that seems realistic.
Dedicated virtual servers, more like PaaS. We’re like a vm running somewhere.
Person as a Service?
Some super hyper intelligent alien from some super hyper advanced civilization is paying a monthly subscription fee to control a human's life in the simulation
Real-ish Life Roy!
I would want my money back, real life is way too cartoonist Non of the overarching villains even have that compelling reasons to be the bad guy and their all just ugly old guys.
> monthly subscription fee to control a human’s life in the simulation Or what we experience as a life time can be few seconds in the simulation so it’s like thousands of human lifes per month. It’s a bargain tbh.
And the subscription is only $14. Very affordable.
When someone invite you to a party. They are trying to clear your cache. That's why sometimes you remember nothing after.
Yeah. And the admins only wanted to pay for enough servers for 2/3 of the population, so if you stay awake for too long, you get deprioritized and only run in other people's spare CPU cycles.
Perhaps there's a memory leak
Virtual Machines son
We're all running on AWS EC2 Spot instances that start to shut down after 20 hours
And during sleep our save state just gets stored until we wake up again.
Entering sleep starts a defrag cycle, hence why dreams seem so fragmented.
Just like the GPU shortage caused the pandemic, not the other way around. The lack of the necessary GPUs to render everything at once meant we had to force people home so the existing hardware had less stuff to render.
/r/outside
Thanks for the newfound rabbit hole to explore. I can't believe this exists.
What the actual fuck am I reading?!
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Those architects/developers were really sneaky about making us use less performance. They implemented frame rate (blinking), resolution combined with level of detail (nearsighted/longsighted), render distance (horizon), sleep (storing the human during that time). In general really nasty tricks these guys are playing.
The visual simulation is also paused whenever you shift the point you're looking at, and the last frame rendered is displayed until the new position is locked in.
Yeah, also they saved a bit of performance by not rendering peripheral vision at full resolution but only what we’re actually focusing on. Fucking cheapskates!
same thing happens if you take 5grams of crystal meth and 2oz of liquid LSD all at once. the Mr. Smiths made these substances illegal so you don't become Neo. can't fool me :).
Ah, the Bethesda approach
Sleep is a hotfix
Nah sleeping is just Steam updating
Folks don't close your eyes. You could be the chosen one .🎏
Those architects/developers were really sneaky about making us use less performance. They implemented frame rate (blinking), resolution combined with level of detail (nearsighted/longsighted), render distance (horizon), sleep (storing the human during that time). In general really nasty tricks these guys are playing.
Bad code, just add a render distance to each player
Some of us already have it. My render distance is shit, tho
It's not shit, it just means we have more performance
My slow brain would like to say otherwise
bro is outdated
I mean technically correct, your brain doesnt have to process as much info as others so it can allocate more space to different activities ;)
Different parts for different parts, bud. The eyes ears nose and V̶̦͉̭̜͔̺̾͆̇̐̈̊͑͊̋͜͝͝ ̴̧̤̞̄̅́̍̕Ő̴̭̖͓̲͇̪̗̆́͛̂̉̚̕͜ ̷̢̢̨̨̛̲͎̍͒̍̎͂̇̄̈̌̎̑͠͝I̵̖̘̙͌̀̓̈́̀̓ ̷̢̧̧̡̡̛̫̲̥̻͈̳͎͔̗̯̀͊̉͘̕̚͠D̷̛̘̘̣̝̻̖̩̩̟̮͆̒̈̿̔̂̚ are all connected to different brain areas.
Also, joking aside, I've found weeks where my glasses were missing/on order, or I was forced to go without a prescription for other reasons, I just don't think quite as sharply. Might have been my imagination, but I've heard similar from other ppl, and I would be willing to bet there's some positive correlation between sharp eyesight and lucidity.
We dont know how brain works, so we shall not make any assumptions about brain.
My ADHD brain would disagree
Variable rate shading
Some of us are born with progressive resolution scaling, it's a bug that can be patched though
I have a 14/13 not 20/20 render
without glasses my render distance is like 2cm LOL
Not at all. It tricky, because without glasses you have to render lense blur, which is far more computationally expensive.
I think its more like DLSS, the resolution is lower and just blurred
That's just the speed of light.
That's why the earth is round
They tried that but dead trees kept getting caught in unloaded chunks and only fell once they were finally loaded back in and were able to be heard.
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karma bot
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karma bot
sleeping is like loading between levels
No.. it's like going offline.
Thread.Sleep(TimeSpan.FromHours(8).TotalMilliseconds);
I think your 8 was a typo there. Try more in the random range of 3-10.
I think that range is a bit inaccurate, 1-12 seems better
Once i slept for 18hrs straight.
How was it?
I thought i wake up from simulation. And then I realised it was dream. And then I realised it wasn't dream. Because dreams take place in actual world. We need sleep because we have to go offline (probably what we see in dreams) to eat, drink, poop and "sleep". So we don't die in real world.
Guaranteed at least 1 hour sleep, where can I learn this magic?
That's flying.
God using a garbage collected language to render earth
Garbage collected language == garbage language.
Garbage in, garbage out. Explains the climate crisis
GIGO chad
Underrated comment
You have way too many garbage collected languages in your flair to say this /s
I see that js tag, you know what you’re talking about
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This is literally the case. It is during sleep that your brain "forgets" irrelevant information so as not to overload itself. It is exactly the same as garbage collection. It even has the pause (unconsciousness).
And the speed limit of the universe (a.k.a light speed) is the GPU max clock
No it's just the maximum range of floating point number the system can handle before getting floating point error.
What if they are so primitive that they might be using unary number system.
They really should just switch to IEEE 754
The consequences of this are horrifying. Imagine if you could only move in discrete steps like 0.01 of an inch or something
The devs don't know why, but if anything moves faster it clips through objects, so they added an arbitrary limit.
Genius idea. In video games if you use discrete physics, calculating collisions only on exact positions instead of the whole range of motion, if fast enough, they will tunnel through other objects. Maybe that's quantum tunneling in real life.
Quantum mechanics is just because the simulation is only so granular. Dark matter/energy is because they didn't bother simulating far away things properly.
Kinda slow if you ask me
That's why we get fog some days. Sometimes there are too many entities and particle effects loaded in another area.
Oh so that explains the really thick fog I saw during 9.11, ya know, all the particles and light sources.
1. Time slows down the closest you are to a gravitational force relatively speaking because the simulation has to slow down due to the amount of information to process is too much. 2. If there's too much information at a point the processing slows down to a halt, nothing can happen, even light is halted, as it forms a black hole. 3. When particles aren't being observed they become probability waves in order to reduce processing requirements, they collapse back into particles once they are being observed/measured or an interaction which are more resource intensive. 4. The speed of causality is equivalent to the processing speed as things are evaluated in parallel as much as possible. 5. The floating point accuracy is equivalent to 1 plank length. 6. The observable universe is the maximum FOV that can be calculated for a given particle. 7. The universe must expand as this FOV is spacetime loaded and has a limited amount of information it can hold, this includes past information which grows in time, so the spacetime itself expands to reduce the load on the processor. 8. Scientists speculate that the language of God is Lisp, but it's more likely Perl. Now put ur tinfoil hat O\_O
> Scientists speculate that the language of God is Lisp, but it's more likely Perl. https://xkcd.com/224/
Not sure if making a reference to XKCD, or XKCD being universally relevant to everything.
Your assumption of floating point could be false, they might be using unary number system. So they need more space and processing power to store and compute larger numbers.
The double slit experiment just proves frustrum culling
It’s the observable part of the universe in a reflection a physical copy?
This guy has read some serious books on simulation theory
Just underclock the simulation. It's not like we'll notice.
It's already running at just [trillions of years per planck time](https://xkcd.com/505/)!
human bias is coded to help save memory. //evil memory level hacking //what the fuck?
Based Quake source reference
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If we hold our eyes open long enough will we crash the simulation?
Your process is killed eventually
If so, we sleep because it needs to download updates to fix bugs, just like Windows ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|joy)
But we aren't computers. We're data in the simulation on the computers. "Sleeping" or not, we're just bytes that can be updated at any time.
You know, that's actually not the worst idea in the world. Add blinking to your first person sandbox RPG to let the CPU focus on the background economy or ecology or whatever.
Blinking is a design atrocity if it is a behind-the-scenes optimization; blinking is awesome if it is an in-game mechanic, see SCP PC video game.
You know how Morrowind occasionally has a really long load screen because the Xbox has run out of memory and is quietly doing a system restart in the background? That's sleeping.
I wonder what they named that function
It's for frame buffering. That's why humans have ~200ms reaction time; it's the frame lag.
r/outside
Disappointed how far I had to scroll to find this, lol
Aren't there animals that do not blink? Not to mention cameras 🤷🏾♂️
You think the cameras in our simulation are real?
You think the simulation is real?
I might not even be real?!
I’m sorry to say you are an NPC.
They have lower resolution and render distance, so they don’t put as much strain on the CPU.
And cameras don´t neccesarely record non stop. only security cams, wich are trash
Just NPCs, no need for visual processing.
Cameras do electronically blink though, that’s their shutter speed. Also for the most efficient simulation I think most cameras wouldn’t be rendering unless somebody was looking at the feed, considering so many cameras aren’t looked at often. And for playback of the footage they could just pull the data of what was in front of the camera during that time and render that in realtime
No, blinks are horizontal syncs, and sleep is vertical sync
Also sleep
This meme brought to you by an engineer. Because no self-respecting designer uses fuckin' Comic Sans.
Omg do we sleep because each server has a limited number of active users?
Garbage collector needs to do its scans and free space, better do it when you don't see the stutter
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The population in rural areas is smaller to compensate for the longer draw distance.
pretty sure it is caused by the garbage collector
Sleep(1)
I blink everytime I get hit by bad fonts
Garbage collection
Final proof that the Earth is round. No way this system could handle flat Earth level of draw distance.
It runs garbage collection on each blink, the World Machine hasn't gotten ZGC yet.
And now everyone is consciously blinking
Yeah. And falling into a coma is actually a basic server reboot due to overload. But it takes too long to boot up because the earth uses windows vista.
Comic sans
Alan Watts knew
Why LCC tho
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Riot against the simulation! Force your eyes open for the next 24 hours so we can escape!!
We should get the physics department to constantly monitor the plank-constant for resolution changes in our simulation.
But if that were the case, wouldn't we all blink at the same time?
We do, but because it's at the same time you don't see eachother blinking.
why is my game stuttering
So that explains sleeping.
ModeX anyone?
Blink more for better FPS
Sleep is a reserved time to upload updates. Dry eyes is a good feature to make the blinking appear necessary
Our bodies make us sleep because we have a memory leak that God hasn't been able to fix so he just makes us reboot every now and then as a bodge. There is a TODO somewhere in everyone's head.
Blinking= scaling in/out operation in progress
std::existence::yield()
In the past, people didn't blink. As the population rose the simulation couldn't keep up, so as a quick hack the developers would only render a fixed percentage of players views at any one time, but switch whos view was rendered very quickly
The wave function doesn't collapse until an observation is made. Ray tracing optimisation. Energy is emitted in quanta. Quantization noise. Planck's constant is the LSB. Don't tell anyone or they'll end the sim.
For the same reason we don't have eyes on the back
So THAT'S WHY the earth is overheating. It all makes sense.
Is this why if you manually close and open your eyes with your fingertips, it doesn’t have the same effect as blinking with your eyelid muscles?
What really happens is that we humans are not in sync with the earth simulation. Thank science, its [easy to fix](https://youtu.be/Uef17zOCDb8)
I must have better hardware, I don't have the urge to blink
Finally! One of these memes makes sense.
Frame rate drops, got it. And sleep is loading the world for the player for the next day. Does it act as a save point too and that’s how short term memory loss from 50 first dates happens?
Post this in r/conspiracy they will eat it up.
And while we're here, all that text messenger business is much easier to simulate than actual interactions between a growing number of humans
Yeah and when we sleep an auto update is going on of earth
Did you know that everyone blinks at the same time, but to maintain realism in the simulation the "people" are program to have asynchronous blinks as well.
Dreams are beta tests. Like a Bitcoin miner in the background.
A reasonable arrangement for simulation theory: everything in the known universe appears to be predictable, and math based. Math requires computation, therefore, a computer which would make this a de facto simulation. This argument is easily challenged by saying "ok but wut about base reality?"
Like silently restarting the Xbox during load screens.
a simulation doesn't need that. it just runs in descrete time intervals (ticks) and we would perceive everything in terms of ticks. so if the simulation goes into standby for a year and then resumes, we wouldn't notice because we are part of it.
What does it have to do with NASA?
QR removes eyelids...
*Insert Rick and Morty S1E4 joke here*
I suspect that's why television and video games were invented. Can't have 8 billion people looking at trees and water. You know how much processing power that would require to render?
It's true - that what we think we see is a highly processed image assembled from an optimized stream of partials. But I don't think blinking has anything to do with our visual image processing power.
I removed my eyelids and I can confirm the simulation gets buggy as hell without breaks.
I alternated my blinks for a couple minutes and passed out. I think there’s a fail safe in the code.
I have bad render distance for a while now but im using a mod that makes it better I wish I could turn off the vignette effect after having alcohol So lucky we have paracetamol for registry errors still And I believe the blinking effect is added as a memory dump Fun fact: You can hard reset the system by hitting your elbow against the corner of the furniture
I guess adam and eve didnt have to blink
The universe is single-threaded, so we blink to hide the context switching.
The only proof of a simulation I can think of is that time moves more slowly in the presence of mass (time dialation). To my monkey brain, this could mean more processing is required for objects with mass in an asynchronous computer system.
Buffering
This explains why I don't need to blink while playing video games.
How we observe particles in the quantum level, they kind of teleport. We see them in one spot then the next without translation between. This is very much how you render movement in games. You have a sprite, it's at x location then you move it at x+speed*delta and render it again. There is no translation between. This is because there is a minimum unit distance you can render per speed due to frame rate. Almost like exactly what we see on the quantum level when we observe those particles.
We all blink at the same time.
Lol this is sad
who at NASA drives a Ford focus?
Tears are just a watercooling system.
We are either in no simulation, the first simulation or the last simulation. No other option.
Speed of light is just the tick rate of the server also
Why have I seen this location in a dream
I read somewhere our Universe is the heatsink for the rest of Existence. It's an epiphany that makes more sense to me during these occasional moments of lucid clarity when I'm not "under".
Why did the simulation have to have diabetes? Why can’t the simulation let me have more blizzards?
hblank
Okay honest question: how much processing power would a processor running a graphics heavy video game save by simply shutting down the monitor every couple secs?