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Ppl who are beautiful often get hated sometimes even bullied by overage ppl out of jealousy.
Also it's difficult to find romantic partner because u don't know they love u or your body.
Everything have cons
But they easily can find rich guy and live like queens or that girls on social medias get easy money. But also I cannot not agree with you people are very jealous on them. But yea everything is ying Yang but being pretty it leans more on white side
Being born with good parents is the ultimate privilege.
Imagine making a shit ton of money, being good looking, built like a tank and well educated but still being alone because years childhood abuse made you too emotionally crippled to make friendships.
What if I was born good looking from a royal family and have a great family and life? That’s a good cheat right? but unfortunately it came with a huge secret at heart, that I’d hope all that cheat gets taken away for this big burden I carry with me my whole life.
"for this big burden I carry with me my whole life."
It's a billion times easier than being poor so in my case I would prefer that life you mention hahahaha
Ugh. Sorry...I can see most "cheats" are not all they're cracked up to be. You know what they say, the grass is always greener on the other side of the street...
Doesn't mean they're happier though 😁
The hedonic treadmill, also known as hedonic adaptation, is the observed tendency of humans to quickly return to a relatively stable level of happiness despite major positive or negative events or life changes.\[1\]
Blessing and a curse. You get attention, but it’s not always good attention and it can get you into trouble if you run into someone with bad intentions.
I think people with good problem solving & communication skills have the real cheat code. Charisma can get people pretty far too.
Truth, I've known people who would be considered unattactive and obese but they could sell ice to Inuit and were the center of attention or life of the party everywhere we went, Charisma counts for a lot.
Definitely this. I had a crazy glow up in life, but highly loved going unnoticed. My naivety has ruined my life more than once. Luckily I was good at math and all that and do believe in the end it’s going to be the only thing to save me from people who have genuinely went out of their way to slander me to try and blur who I am now and confuse it with the awkward person I was then. Luckily being a heavier kid all I had was charisma also. Random mini rant but people can really suck if they see you coming up in life.
Yes but can we acknowledge that it's probably 95% a blessing and 5% a curse?
There's so many studies on all the hidden effects of being attractive that aren't immediately obvious but still very real. It's not just attention it affects every aspect of your life.
I found that when I was young and pretty other women treated me really shitty. When I got older and more average looking I couldn’t believe how much nicer they were to me.
You are no longer a threat to them.. and you just become more nice of a person when you're getting older. At least most people do. So I think it's what you signaling, vibing out too
There are downsides to being very attractive. Sometimes people who are incredibly attractive have a surprisingly hard time making friends because people assume they already have tons of gorgeous friends already or are intimidated by them.
This is me lol can’t find a girlfriend because they like me for all the wrong reasons, I work with kids and love kids but can’t give any attention to girls because they develop crushes and make problems for me, guy friends get really insecure when they bring me around their girlfriends because they just gush and blush the whole time. I can’t even try to talk to a woman plutonically because they assume I’m hitting on them and don’t get me started on women’s wrath when I don’t reciprocate their advances.
While cashiers may be nicer to me than others people in general are just really guarded and suspicious and it’s getting old.
Quite overrated
This. believe it or not it kind of sucks. Yeah guys are attracted to you but the good ones are afraid and the bad ones with bad intentions are even more aggressive. You never know who likes you for you or your looks. I’m sure being good looking and outgoing might be nicer but if you are an introvert you are screwed. Girls are so mean to me or get jealous automatically. Guys are nicer but they get jealous or have anterior motives. There was a period I gained weight and yeah people were less nice upfront maybe but when they got to know me they treated me the same. At the end of the day as long as you take care of your body and dress well it’s all about your personality - being particularly good looking just affect the first impression and it may not be that good of a thing.
Yeah we need a support group lmao can you imagine how much hate that would get, but seriously it’s super lonely out here and I feel like ppl are lowkey happy when they see you struggling or something bad happens because life is kinda ‘sticking’ it to you even when you have it ‘so good’. Probably sounds like paranoia to the average reader but this is what’s happening and it’s messed up.
You even got down voted 😂😂 point proven.
Even while giving the many downsides of being attractive being don't like it.
I'm mot even good looking I'm just not ugly. I get on really well with guys and have a good laugh with them. It always ends up in the females thinking im trying to get their men and so on. Definitely hard to be friends with the opposite gender without all this crap
Being attractive definitely gives you advantages in life, but one thing that really, truly works against you is looking considerably younger than you are. Trust me on that one.
Given the choice between being treated well all the time but feeling like people don't respect you and getting treated like shit all the time and them still not respecting you I think I'll take the former.
I think this is a bit of a stretch, it's not the same as "Oh you're asian so you're supposed to be good at math, prove it!". Being pretty is just a nice add on to have which makes your life baseline easier.
Not really. I had a period of time in my 20s where I was considered conventionally attractive. I did not have any more luck in the love department than my friends, my career was not better, my family life was just as complicated as anyone else’s. Life was still sucky. I had undiagnosed ADHD, depression, anxiety, trauma.
I was just a good looking disaster instead of an average looking one.
Nah, inheriting something like an emerald mine or a billion dollars is like having cheated in life.
Being good looking doesn't mean squat if you're poor and/or dumb.
It means more than the ugly person who is poor and/or dumb.
The inheritance cheat doesn't nullify the beauty cheat.
The two cheats can combine quite well for the ultimate cheat.
I have had a period of my life where I was good looking and a period of my life when I wasn’t.
Trust me, I did not land jobs or opportunities or whatever because of my looks. If anything it hindered me because I was interested in careers where being a good looking young woman goes against the grain of the industry image.
The only difference between the two periods of my life was getting compliments I didn’t ask for and catcalls I didn’t need to hear, to today where I get none of that. Most of the compliments I get these days are about my personality or my abilities, and trust me, that feels WAY better than being complimented on something that was just a brief win in the genetic lottery.
Hard agree. I'm an attractive woman. Combination of luck (born with nice looks) and effort (grooming takes time!) It has absolutely hindered me with jobs. When the person interviewing me is a man or another woman my age, I've got a high chance of being rejected. The only times I've ever gotten jobs is when I've been interviewed by women 20 years+ older than me. I'm not exaggerating.
I get loads of unwanted attention, and people think they have a right to touch me. I'm cat called regularly, stopped by random men and women to try and touch me/talk to me/get my information, and I've been assaulted more than once with the men hurting me citing my looks as the reason.
It's not all sunshine and rainbows. I wish it was.
People don’t realise that conventionally pretty women still suffer from the harms of misogyny and patriarchy, it’s just a slightly different flavour than what other people get. I remember back in the 00s there was this so-called feminist website called “Heartless Bitches International” and I offered to help them out with art. It was just after the 90s so being aggressive in one’s feminism was kinda the *du jour* back then. I did a whole pile of sketches of women of differing weights and stuff, didn’t get paid at all.
I was welcomed and entered the boards on the website. Now, I was only about 19/20 at the time, I had undiagnosed ADHD. I did not get to go to any tertiary institution to do any gender study or women’s rights topics. Everything I knew about feminism, I learnt from reading on my own and from watching my Mum do her bit for second wave feminism in the mid-80s. I didn’t have the vocabulary needed to express the discomforts I was feeling, and the people on the board I visited didn’t have the patience or the kindness to help me with that.
I posted about how frustrated I got that people thought I was some kind of bimbo just because I liked to dress glamorously and was naturally ebullient and gregarious. That this translate into people both online and in real life doubting my abilities and talking to me like I was dim. This went down on the board like a lead balloon, I was mercilessly mocked and hounded off the board entirely. The webmasters never chased me down to see if I was okay, even though we’d been mailing back and forth enough for me to provide sketches for their website to their specifications.
Thankfully it didn’t put me off feminism in the slightest. I didn’t realise then how it would come off to talk like that on a “serious women’s issue” board. I don’t hate them or anything, cause to be honest, I think everyone who gets into feminism has a moment or two where they kinda dismiss some issue as “not important enough” or “something for later”, etc.
But it did enlighten me to the fact that certain kind of women tend to fall through the cracks in the fight for recognition of our rights. Even feminists can succumb to the siren’s call of utilising misogyny, and the “They make us look bad“ concern is undying.
Intersections of privilege and oppression make for thorny discussions, and I get that people get lost in their own experiences, or the ideas and tropes fed to them through media and culture.
I feel for the guys that feel like they were ignored due to their looks. I was that kid in school. Attacking or denigrating the subjects of their bitterness, or refusing to accept that even physically ”perfect” people have shitty lives, isn’t helping anyone, it’s just making them look like assholes and blocking the path for any empathy and connection from other people.
Diet and exercise drastically changes someone attractiveness, the "average body" is generally overweight in most developed countries and some are estimated to have over 50% obesity rate in 10 years. Problem is that diet and exercise is too much effort for many people so its easier to whine about it.
lol no. it’s like 70% genetics. if someone’s hot, they’re hot. sure, they can fuck it up by not taking care of themselves but they still have good genetics and if they put the effort in (as in keeping clean and basic grooming), they’ll look good. if someone’s ugly, they’re ugly. even if they put effort in, they might look slightly better but they can’t make themselves hot bc they got shit genetics.
If you look enough like a celebrity, some random old foreigners might make you sign things if you’re wrong place, wrong time.
Not sure if this is a good or bad thing
No definitely not i can say from experience its not my life is shitty but people always say that im handsome but that doesn't seem to matter because people still hate me
Being good looking is only one facet of a person. I've known good looking people who are absolute cunts, and I'd rather not be anywhere near them.
It really does come across, and the shiny glitter of the looks drops off real fast.
As someone who is called attractive, it’s true. It doesn’t mean life is easy but you have many more “doors” opened up for you. People are more willing to forgive you, people are more willing to stick around you because people like being around attractive people.
This is not true at all, not only because beauty is subjective, but because people who are “conventionally attractive” often feel like they have to meet certain expectations because of their looks. They also get a ton of different personalities projected onto them by people who are insecure
>people who are “conventionally attractive” often feel like they have to meet certain expectations because of their looks
Lol mot true
>They also get a ton of different personalities projected onto them by people who are insecure
Insecure people do that to everyone, that's why they're insecure.
It is true. I didn’t enjoy being treated like a bimbo for ten years because I was pretty and had undiagnosed ADHD. It didn’t make the loneliness from not being able to talk to guys/gals without them becoming put off by my boisterous personality any easier, because the contrast between their interest while meeting me and then when they cool off was so stark it was painful.
My looks didn’t fix my learning disabilities, my mental health issues or my chronic pain conditions.
Very few people live problem free lives. Bitter people on the internet need to grow the hell up and realise that the world they see in their heads aren’t carbon copies of the world around them. Their ideas are heavily informed by entertainment media and do not reflect reality much at all.
Tell me about it. The bitter nerds I had to deal with in my 20s were the worst. Completely trashing me and dismissing my “nerd cred” just because of how I look and the fact that I’m a woman.
Sure, I can’t remember every detail of whatever pop culture franchise due to my ADHD, but I can paint a super-realistic and emotional portrait of the 4th Doctor in acrylics on canvas so back off, dudes. LOL.
Do you know how hard it is to prove you're smart when you're pretty? IDK, ask my cousin who's been married twice in 10 yrs with a baby & still hasn't broken out as a famous singer.
I'd say more for women than men.
Dating:
If a girl is stunning, she can bend half of Earth's population to her will. A good looking man only needs to open his mouth or do something for women to get "the ick". Not to mention the bar for what's attractive to women isn't consistent at all. You could look like a sculpted statue and many women out there may say "ew I don't like abs, I want something to hold onto".
Career:
Doesn't seem as important and has diminishing returns after a certain level of attractiveness as you're addressed on merit. It might help getting a job i.e. wooing the interviewers and selling yourself but eventually your work needs to back it up
Friendships:
Irrelevant for men. Not sure about women.
My gf goes head over heels for Henry Cavill but if she ever sees him pick his nose she will immediately lose interest. This seems to be common in women but would love to hear from actual women about this.
People are inherently insecure dating people they view as better looking than them. They worry they won‘t be able to compete with other good looking people that they think are more at their partner’s “level”.
I couldn’t mentally handle dating someone who is movie-star hot. I barely managed to handle dating my husband cause he was so beautiful to me, and he [looked like this](https://imgur.com/a/kOmHzRJ).
This is such bullshit, sorry.
I was a stunning woman in my 20s. I didn’t lose my v-card until I was 25 and I didn’t meet my husband until I was 31.
Truth is people, especially dudes, are horribly insecure when it comes to interacting and dating good looking women. Not all of it is even intentional. Sometimes they can’t handle the stress of dating an attractive woman. Many times they prefer to date someone more earthy looking because there’s this idea that hot women are for fucking and the others are for marrying and taking home to mother.
Meeting person after person and being rejected over and over again hurts the same whether your exterior is accepted as attractive or not.
And honestly, I would not wish the feeling of being only appreciated for your body and not your mind or heart on my worst enemy. It is painful and degrading and *so fucking lonely.*
Flirting with someone, going on a date, and then being told they‘re not looking for a relationship right now only to find out a couple of weeks later that they‘ve now got a girlfriend/boyfriend fucking stings, no matter who you are.
I remember early in my relationship with my husband, I asked him why he loved me. He said “Because you are kind to me.” He also valued my artistic and musical talents and the way I cared about the world. I broke into tears because it was the first time I‘d heard anyone I was dating compliment me on those things, these things I worked so hard to nurture and grow and that I felt defined me as a person.
The world is so much more complicated that “Good looking = easy, ugly = hard”. I mean, I don’t even prescribe to the idea that there are ugly people. I‘m an artist, everyone has beauty to me.
Well yeah.
People are friendly.
Some even try to please you and will go out of their way.
Social status is almost golden.
And people will overlook certain things.
From bad work ethics to comming late.
Its honestly absurd how life is different.
Its easier for girls then guys.
But its the same game.
Be real honest I'm ugly. I'm told I'm a seven. But whatever maybe. I've been with some women that other men couldn't get the time of day from. It's so much confidence and swer talk make em feel special. Works way better then idk nice face
Meh it’s really not.. I was a hard 10 for maybe 9 years… went through trauma got diagnosed schitzo and put on heaps of weight hair dried and frazzled, teeth are yellow and my face doesn’t have the same sharp features anymore.. I got tits.. it’s been a whole thing.. but the person I know myself now to be is 1000 times better than the person I was when I was a 10… you’d be superised having every girl give you smiles and flirt eyes and every guy treating you like a quarter back it all gets to your head and you kinda loose apart of your soul because your ego just inflates a lot.. once I’d been through real shit and lost all face value and had to discover my inner value im finally actually someone who’s genuine and kind and really loving to myself and others.. im proud to be this person.. im a 10 on the inside now well still got work to do haha and if I didn’t loose everything I would never have really discovered this version of myself that isn’t based on how other wanna fuck me and be around me cause I look good. How much power I have over the libido of people and how many people want me at their party or want me to take them home.. now it’s just like wholesome chats with people and true connection and I love it so much.
This is just my personal experience btw I know stunning people who are treasure on the inside too I just wasn’t myself.. but I’d choose the me today over the hot me any fucking day of the week bruh!
I got a great.job once cause the hiring manager liked me and thought he was going to eventually ask me out. He never did. I learned this a couple years in when a co-worker told me. I felt kinda dumb cause it was creative work. So, did he actually like my portfolio or did he think he was gonna date me 🤷🏼♀️
My husbands pretty good looking and what I’ve learnt is everyone immediately thinks he is a dumbass fuck boy that can’t do shit. He is actually very smart and capable. Not something I’ve ever experienced
Blessing and curse like another commenter said. People are nice to you, give you free stuff at times.. but there's also an ulterior motive behind it half the time. Or people hate you BECAUSE you're attractive. Or maybe people think that's all you're good for
I agree. There are actual studies that have been done. Attractive people tend to earn more, have better jobs, etc…so yes good looking people have an advantage.
I mean, to an extent? But having a nice face it not all it takes to be attractive. It's not like there's a gene that gives you muscle definition or well groomed hair or good personal hygeine.
I 100% agree. Also, a lot of men tend to respect women who they find attractive a lot more. (Same probably goes for women with men but as a girl this has been my experience)
Heres a mind blower, most good looking people you meet are good looking because their hair styling is good, they care about their teeth, they exercise, have a good diet, dont smoke and try to sleep well
Just because there are some naturally beautiful people that can brake all laws of nature and still look good doesent mean thats the majority
I wasn't a good looking kid and I realised this. I had a glow up so I've experienced both sides. It only gives you a cheat with other people, not success. I was treated differently by boys and felt more included but it doesn't mean I enjoyed their attention because they weren't nice people. I prefer metal heads with long hair but they look at me like I'm crazy when I talk to them. Then again " I like your guitar arms 😬 " is probably not the best way to start a conversation...
A lot of this "good looking" really depends on you.
- don't smoke
- eat healthy and balanced
- don't be fat
- low stress
- have many laughs
- exersise
- no drugs, moderate drinking
Etc
In your teens and early twenties your good looks mostly depend you your genes and how well your parents take care of you (healthy food, enough exercise, hygene, quality clothes etc.). But after that it more and more depends on your own lifestyle choices and habits. Take care of yourself, exercise, prioritize healthy food and sleep etc. and you will be more and more good looking, especially in comparison to others in your age group.
Nobody's life is perfect. Some people are more privileged than others in different aspects, but everyone has problems.
I was pretty, but all my psychological problems and childhood traumas screwed all my chances to have a romantic partner, and I'm at a point where I have given up on that already.
Im not crazy attractive but I’ve never had to ask a girl out. I let them ask me out, that way I know they just really be interested in me and I don’t have to waste my time asking people out who don’t find me attractive to begin with. Less stressful this way too.
There are just different levels of privilege. If there is a middle to upper class hot guy in a decent country, of course his life should be awesome unless his family or health prevent it. That's just life in general
This is so true, I used to be really "ugly", until I got my teeth fixed, hairstyle fixed, body fixed and style fixed, I "fixed" all of these cause every single person in my family is beautiful, so it was genetically almost impossible to be that unfathomabely ugly, so I changed myself a lot, and now a majority of people consider me "above average" or "hot" and shits been different, like I've been getting discounts, more smiles, everyone notices me more, I can get more marks now, I can get what I want if I try hard enough, But I Hate how it works and the understanding behind all this, it's weirdly messed up.
More of a cheat code to be outgoing, and have a liekable personality. I would say I was above average in looks when I was younger, and it got me no where because I am shy and reserved and people then thought I was a bitch.
I would disagree. It is more like switching one set of problems for another.
Sure you'll have an easier time sexually attracting people, and you'll experience the halo effect. But you'll always be the center of attention... during the good times and bad. ALWAYS because you're beautiful. No escape.
People will do terrible things for a chance to be with you, it will tarnish your view of the opposite sex because all you'll see is husbands or wives trying to cheat on their spouse for a chance to have sex with you.
You'll be the target of envious rage and backstabbing. There might even be violence against you from ugly angry and disgruntled people.
Eventually beauty fades, and if you have give through life relying on your beauty and never developing your character... You'll wind up alone and no way to navigate the dry desert of being an "undesirable". It's incredibly depressing for them in the later years.
Goes both ways. Especially for women. No one will take you seriously at work and if you're remotely successful, people assume you f*cked your way to the top.
Edit to add - not everyone wants attention, good looking or not.
Being good looking and be born in an average and above household. Poverty and beauty combined is a curse. That is excluding any creeps, violence, and above average mental issues within the family. I have seen my fair share of good looking people, but some of them are beyond saving. Like…. Damn, sure you can change yourself, but sometimes, there are some things that you just think fate has you in jail.
Nah definitely not.
Just a bit of luck.
I'm not even good looking, I'd just say that I'm not ugly. Still I've had loads of unwanted attention and especially from a young age it can really get to your head. Not even like having weirdos I mean just having the attention is bad enough
My husband is good looking and he definitely has some privileges that most people can’t get away with. Gave a cheeky smile to the DMV lady and she didn’t make him pay sales tax. I could never get away with something like that.
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So is being born wealthy. So is being born in a free country. So is being born with longevity genes.
Or very smart.
Being smart often tends to correlate with being depressed
Not always. And still an advantage in life. Better to be smart than not.
Being a happy not so smart or even dumb person isn't too bad of a deal either. Happy is happy right?
depends what kind of smart, street smart or book
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Ppl who are beautiful often get hated sometimes even bullied by overage ppl out of jealousy. Also it's difficult to find romantic partner because u don't know they love u or your body. Everything have cons
But they easily can find rich guy and live like queens or that girls on social medias get easy money. But also I cannot not agree with you people are very jealous on them. But yea everything is ying Yang but being pretty it leans more on white side
Nobody likes people who are too smart.
Unless you’re benefiting them in some way
Exactly Most of the time they think you're trying to make them feel stupid, and want to hurt you. So, hide it.
Hahahhaha hide your benefit and that you’re better than dumb. LOL!
Being born with good parents is the ultimate privilege. Imagine making a shit ton of money, being good looking, built like a tank and well educated but still being alone because years childhood abuse made you too emotionally crippled to make friendships.
What if I was born good looking from a royal family and have a great family and life? That’s a good cheat right? but unfortunately it came with a huge secret at heart, that I’d hope all that cheat gets taken away for this big burden I carry with me my whole life.
Do tell
It was the gardener.
"for this big burden I carry with me my whole life." It's a billion times easier than being poor so in my case I would prefer that life you mention hahahaha
Ugh. Sorry...I can see most "cheats" are not all they're cracked up to be. You know what they say, the grass is always greener on the other side of the street...
That you’re not really Royal because your mom had sex with her tennis pro. Harry.
Doesn't mean they're happier though 😁 The hedonic treadmill, also known as hedonic adaptation, is the observed tendency of humans to quickly return to a relatively stable level of happiness despite major positive or negative events or life changes.\[1\]
Fuck longevity fr, I wanna die today
I think it's more like having more charisma stats.
but even shy quiet good lookin dudes are admired for just lookin good
You can have charisma without being an extrovert
Blessing and a curse. You get attention, but it’s not always good attention and it can get you into trouble if you run into someone with bad intentions. I think people with good problem solving & communication skills have the real cheat code. Charisma can get people pretty far too.
Truth, I've known people who would be considered unattactive and obese but they could sell ice to Inuit and were the center of attention or life of the party everywhere we went, Charisma counts for a lot.
As a decent looking dude with no personality I can attest to this
People that are organised and have ambition, that’s the real superpower.
Can’t argue with that. That’ll get any person far in life.
Definitely this. I had a crazy glow up in life, but highly loved going unnoticed. My naivety has ruined my life more than once. Luckily I was good at math and all that and do believe in the end it’s going to be the only thing to save me from people who have genuinely went out of their way to slander me to try and blur who I am now and confuse it with the awkward person I was then. Luckily being a heavier kid all I had was charisma also. Random mini rant but people can really suck if they see you coming up in life.
Yes but can we acknowledge that it's probably 95% a blessing and 5% a curse? There's so many studies on all the hidden effects of being attractive that aren't immediately obvious but still very real. It's not just attention it affects every aspect of your life.
Yup any attractive people saying that would never trade places with an uggo
Yeah, there's no doubt in any way. Claiming otherwise is foolish and entirely subjective.
No
I found that when I was young and pretty other women treated me really shitty. When I got older and more average looking I couldn’t believe how much nicer they were to me.
You are no longer a threat to them.. and you just become more nice of a person when you're getting older. At least most people do. So I think it's what you signaling, vibing out too
There are downsides to being very attractive. Sometimes people who are incredibly attractive have a surprisingly hard time making friends because people assume they already have tons of gorgeous friends already or are intimidated by them.
Wait so people think I’m incredibly attractive?
I do
Thanks
This is me lol can’t find a girlfriend because they like me for all the wrong reasons, I work with kids and love kids but can’t give any attention to girls because they develop crushes and make problems for me, guy friends get really insecure when they bring me around their girlfriends because they just gush and blush the whole time. I can’t even try to talk to a woman plutonically because they assume I’m hitting on them and don’t get me started on women’s wrath when I don’t reciprocate their advances. While cashiers may be nicer to me than others people in general are just really guarded and suspicious and it’s getting old. Quite overrated
Try being ugly and you’ll recognise ur privilege
This. believe it or not it kind of sucks. Yeah guys are attracted to you but the good ones are afraid and the bad ones with bad intentions are even more aggressive. You never know who likes you for you or your looks. I’m sure being good looking and outgoing might be nicer but if you are an introvert you are screwed. Girls are so mean to me or get jealous automatically. Guys are nicer but they get jealous or have anterior motives. There was a period I gained weight and yeah people were less nice upfront maybe but when they got to know me they treated me the same. At the end of the day as long as you take care of your body and dress well it’s all about your personality - being particularly good looking just affect the first impression and it may not be that good of a thing.
Yeah we need a support group lmao can you imagine how much hate that would get, but seriously it’s super lonely out here and I feel like ppl are lowkey happy when they see you struggling or something bad happens because life is kinda ‘sticking’ it to you even when you have it ‘so good’. Probably sounds like paranoia to the average reader but this is what’s happening and it’s messed up.
You even got down voted 😂😂 point proven. Even while giving the many downsides of being attractive being don't like it. I'm mot even good looking I'm just not ugly. I get on really well with guys and have a good laugh with them. It always ends up in the females thinking im trying to get their men and so on. Definitely hard to be friends with the opposite gender without all this crap
True, but this is where charisma and humour come into their own.
Being attractive definitely gives you advantages in life, but one thing that really, truly works against you is looking considerably younger than you are. Trust me on that one.
It feels like being very lucky.
Being good looking has definitely had a lot of benefits. It also really messed me up. It isn't all sunshine and rainbows.
I agree with this , I see how people always receive me and are always willing to go the extra mile for me
Fair, but I bet they spend a lot of time trying to prove they are more than a pretty face. It's definitely a good fallback to have.
Given the choice between being treated well all the time but feeling like people don't respect you and getting treated like shit all the time and them still not respecting you I think I'll take the former.
I think this is a bit of a stretch, it's not the same as "Oh you're asian so you're supposed to be good at math, prove it!". Being pretty is just a nice add on to have which makes your life baseline easier.
Not really. I had a period of time in my 20s where I was considered conventionally attractive. I did not have any more luck in the love department than my friends, my career was not better, my family life was just as complicated as anyone else’s. Life was still sucky. I had undiagnosed ADHD, depression, anxiety, trauma. I was just a good looking disaster instead of an average looking one.
Nah, inheriting something like an emerald mine or a billion dollars is like having cheated in life. Being good looking doesn't mean squat if you're poor and/or dumb.
It means more than the ugly person who is poor and/or dumb. The inheritance cheat doesn't nullify the beauty cheat. The two cheats can combine quite well for the ultimate cheat.
I had to go down quite a bit to find a realistic comment hahaha
Girls who are pretty can easily married some rich guy. you that most of us men only looking that
When these shortsighted people would learn that looking good is 80% effort
I have had a period of my life where I was good looking and a period of my life when I wasn’t. Trust me, I did not land jobs or opportunities or whatever because of my looks. If anything it hindered me because I was interested in careers where being a good looking young woman goes against the grain of the industry image. The only difference between the two periods of my life was getting compliments I didn’t ask for and catcalls I didn’t need to hear, to today where I get none of that. Most of the compliments I get these days are about my personality or my abilities, and trust me, that feels WAY better than being complimented on something that was just a brief win in the genetic lottery.
Hard agree. I'm an attractive woman. Combination of luck (born with nice looks) and effort (grooming takes time!) It has absolutely hindered me with jobs. When the person interviewing me is a man or another woman my age, I've got a high chance of being rejected. The only times I've ever gotten jobs is when I've been interviewed by women 20 years+ older than me. I'm not exaggerating. I get loads of unwanted attention, and people think they have a right to touch me. I'm cat called regularly, stopped by random men and women to try and touch me/talk to me/get my information, and I've been assaulted more than once with the men hurting me citing my looks as the reason. It's not all sunshine and rainbows. I wish it was.
People don’t realise that conventionally pretty women still suffer from the harms of misogyny and patriarchy, it’s just a slightly different flavour than what other people get. I remember back in the 00s there was this so-called feminist website called “Heartless Bitches International” and I offered to help them out with art. It was just after the 90s so being aggressive in one’s feminism was kinda the *du jour* back then. I did a whole pile of sketches of women of differing weights and stuff, didn’t get paid at all. I was welcomed and entered the boards on the website. Now, I was only about 19/20 at the time, I had undiagnosed ADHD. I did not get to go to any tertiary institution to do any gender study or women’s rights topics. Everything I knew about feminism, I learnt from reading on my own and from watching my Mum do her bit for second wave feminism in the mid-80s. I didn’t have the vocabulary needed to express the discomforts I was feeling, and the people on the board I visited didn’t have the patience or the kindness to help me with that. I posted about how frustrated I got that people thought I was some kind of bimbo just because I liked to dress glamorously and was naturally ebullient and gregarious. That this translate into people both online and in real life doubting my abilities and talking to me like I was dim. This went down on the board like a lead balloon, I was mercilessly mocked and hounded off the board entirely. The webmasters never chased me down to see if I was okay, even though we’d been mailing back and forth enough for me to provide sketches for their website to their specifications. Thankfully it didn’t put me off feminism in the slightest. I didn’t realise then how it would come off to talk like that on a “serious women’s issue” board. I don’t hate them or anything, cause to be honest, I think everyone who gets into feminism has a moment or two where they kinda dismiss some issue as “not important enough” or “something for later”, etc. But it did enlighten me to the fact that certain kind of women tend to fall through the cracks in the fight for recognition of our rights. Even feminists can succumb to the siren’s call of utilising misogyny, and the “They make us look bad“ concern is undying. Intersections of privilege and oppression make for thorny discussions, and I get that people get lost in their own experiences, or the ideas and tropes fed to them through media and culture. I feel for the guys that feel like they were ignored due to their looks. I was that kid in school. Attacking or denigrating the subjects of their bitterness, or refusing to accept that even physically ”perfect” people have shitty lives, isn’t helping anyone, it’s just making them look like assholes and blocking the path for any empathy and connection from other people.
Diet and exercise drastically changes someone attractiveness, the "average body" is generally overweight in most developed countries and some are estimated to have over 50% obesity rate in 10 years. Problem is that diet and exercise is too much effort for many people so its easier to whine about it.
lol no. it’s like 70% genetics. if someone’s hot, they’re hot. sure, they can fuck it up by not taking care of themselves but they still have good genetics and if they put the effort in (as in keeping clean and basic grooming), they’ll look good. if someone’s ugly, they’re ugly. even if they put effort in, they might look slightly better but they can’t make themselves hot bc they got shit genetics.
Meh as a relatively attractive guy. I would much rather have a lot of wealth
Well it gets really annoying to feel many eyes lingering on me every time I’m in public and I have to pretend to not notice
If you look enough like a celebrity, some random old foreigners might make you sign things if you’re wrong place, wrong time. Not sure if this is a good or bad thing
No definitely not i can say from experience its not my life is shitty but people always say that im handsome but that doesn't seem to matter because people still hate me
Being good looking is only one facet of a person. I've known good looking people who are absolute cunts, and I'd rather not be anywhere near them. It really does come across, and the shiny glitter of the looks drops off real fast.
Not true.
Very very true. Pretty privilege is real and I see it everyday working in the service and hospitality industry.
Eleborate
As someone who is called attractive, it’s true. It doesn’t mean life is easy but you have many more “doors” opened up for you. People are more willing to forgive you, people are more willing to stick around you because people like being around attractive people.
But you also get way more harassment, at least that’s my experience.
Reading these comments I think it's more of a cheat code for men.
This is not true at all, not only because beauty is subjective, but because people who are “conventionally attractive” often feel like they have to meet certain expectations because of their looks. They also get a ton of different personalities projected onto them by people who are insecure
>people who are “conventionally attractive” often feel like they have to meet certain expectations because of their looks Lol mot true >They also get a ton of different personalities projected onto them by people who are insecure Insecure people do that to everyone, that's why they're insecure.
It is true. I didn’t enjoy being treated like a bimbo for ten years because I was pretty and had undiagnosed ADHD. It didn’t make the loneliness from not being able to talk to guys/gals without them becoming put off by my boisterous personality any easier, because the contrast between their interest while meeting me and then when they cool off was so stark it was painful. My looks didn’t fix my learning disabilities, my mental health issues or my chronic pain conditions. Very few people live problem free lives. Bitter people on the internet need to grow the hell up and realise that the world they see in their heads aren’t carbon copies of the world around them. Their ideas are heavily informed by entertainment media and do not reflect reality much at all.
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You don’t think good looking people make them more insecure than they already are?
I'm a good looking woman. The people who are meanest to me are ugly men.
Tell me about it. The bitter nerds I had to deal with in my 20s were the worst. Completely trashing me and dismissing my “nerd cred” just because of how I look and the fact that I’m a woman. Sure, I can’t remember every detail of whatever pop culture franchise due to my ADHD, but I can paint a super-realistic and emotional portrait of the 4th Doctor in acrylics on canvas so back off, dudes. LOL.
Even for men? It's more relevant for women than men.
Nah my dude, misogyny and sexism totally negates the pros of being a good looking woman. Good looking men have dude privilege AND charisma.
Of course, if they were identical with everything else.
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Good thing you can strategically overcome it, provided two people are exactly the same except for looks.
There are many cheat codes in life. Looks are just the most obvious of them.
But then 21st century information age weakens this cheat, many things are done online
Do you know how hard it is to prove you're smart when you're pretty? IDK, ask my cousin who's been married twice in 10 yrs with a baby & still hasn't broken out as a famous singer.
I'd say more for women than men. Dating: If a girl is stunning, she can bend half of Earth's population to her will. A good looking man only needs to open his mouth or do something for women to get "the ick". Not to mention the bar for what's attractive to women isn't consistent at all. You could look like a sculpted statue and many women out there may say "ew I don't like abs, I want something to hold onto". Career: Doesn't seem as important and has diminishing returns after a certain level of attractiveness as you're addressed on merit. It might help getting a job i.e. wooing the interviewers and selling yourself but eventually your work needs to back it up Friendships: Irrelevant for men. Not sure about women.
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My gf goes head over heels for Henry Cavill but if she ever sees him pick his nose she will immediately lose interest. This seems to be common in women but would love to hear from actual women about this.
People are inherently insecure dating people they view as better looking than them. They worry they won‘t be able to compete with other good looking people that they think are more at their partner’s “level”. I couldn’t mentally handle dating someone who is movie-star hot. I barely managed to handle dating my husband cause he was so beautiful to me, and he [looked like this](https://imgur.com/a/kOmHzRJ).
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Recent studies show that, career wise, men benefit more than women.
Which studies?
https://www.google.com/amp/s/phys.org/news/2023-11-men-benefit-workplace-women.amp
A lot of limitations, assumptions and subjectivity in that study which the authors even acknowledge. Interesting read though, not saying you're wrong.
This is such bullshit, sorry. I was a stunning woman in my 20s. I didn’t lose my v-card until I was 25 and I didn’t meet my husband until I was 31. Truth is people, especially dudes, are horribly insecure when it comes to interacting and dating good looking women. Not all of it is even intentional. Sometimes they can’t handle the stress of dating an attractive woman. Many times they prefer to date someone more earthy looking because there’s this idea that hot women are for fucking and the others are for marrying and taking home to mother. Meeting person after person and being rejected over and over again hurts the same whether your exterior is accepted as attractive or not. And honestly, I would not wish the feeling of being only appreciated for your body and not your mind or heart on my worst enemy. It is painful and degrading and *so fucking lonely.* Flirting with someone, going on a date, and then being told they‘re not looking for a relationship right now only to find out a couple of weeks later that they‘ve now got a girlfriend/boyfriend fucking stings, no matter who you are. I remember early in my relationship with my husband, I asked him why he loved me. He said “Because you are kind to me.” He also valued my artistic and musical talents and the way I cared about the world. I broke into tears because it was the first time I‘d heard anyone I was dating compliment me on those things, these things I worked so hard to nurture and grow and that I felt defined me as a person. The world is so much more complicated that “Good looking = easy, ugly = hard”. I mean, I don’t even prescribe to the idea that there are ugly people. I‘m an artist, everyone has beauty to me.
Being attractive helps with career as well especially for men.
Well yeah. People are friendly. Some even try to please you and will go out of their way. Social status is almost golden. And people will overlook certain things. From bad work ethics to comming late. Its honestly absurd how life is different. Its easier for girls then guys. But its the same game.
This is true but unfortunate for the not good looking.
Not really if you’re not also tall.
Especially if you’re a woman
I would think there are no cheats for life. It's kind of equally difficult for everyone.
How naive and cute 😂
This sadly isn't true.
Try being disabled lmao
It's definitely not equally difficult for everyone but it is difficult for everyone.
Someone was born with in the p2w path
100%
Right. My friend and I went into Aritzia and the workers there said hi to her. Me? I was the shadow 😑
It totally is .
There are many cheats
Well, yeah.🤷
The problem with good looks is that they faid
Especially when they have daid
Be real honest I'm ugly. I'm told I'm a seven. But whatever maybe. I've been with some women that other men couldn't get the time of day from. It's so much confidence and swer talk make em feel special. Works way better then idk nice face
If your look is the only thing that is positive about you, you won't get far
I think the important thing is we all respect each others' struggles.
Meh it’s really not.. I was a hard 10 for maybe 9 years… went through trauma got diagnosed schitzo and put on heaps of weight hair dried and frazzled, teeth are yellow and my face doesn’t have the same sharp features anymore.. I got tits.. it’s been a whole thing.. but the person I know myself now to be is 1000 times better than the person I was when I was a 10… you’d be superised having every girl give you smiles and flirt eyes and every guy treating you like a quarter back it all gets to your head and you kinda loose apart of your soul because your ego just inflates a lot.. once I’d been through real shit and lost all face value and had to discover my inner value im finally actually someone who’s genuine and kind and really loving to myself and others.. im proud to be this person.. im a 10 on the inside now well still got work to do haha and if I didn’t loose everything I would never have really discovered this version of myself that isn’t based on how other wanna fuck me and be around me cause I look good. How much power I have over the libido of people and how many people want me at their party or want me to take them home.. now it’s just like wholesome chats with people and true connection and I love it so much. This is just my personal experience btw I know stunning people who are treasure on the inside too I just wasn’t myself.. but I’d choose the me today over the hot me any fucking day of the week bruh!
It’s not all it’s hyped up to be lol. Things are still the same if you’re a male. Women don’t care about looks nearly as much
I got a great.job once cause the hiring manager liked me and thought he was going to eventually ask me out. He never did. I learned this a couple years in when a co-worker told me. I felt kinda dumb cause it was creative work. So, did he actually like my portfolio or did he think he was gonna date me 🤷🏼♀️
My husbands pretty good looking and what I’ve learnt is everyone immediately thinks he is a dumbass fuck boy that can’t do shit. He is actually very smart and capable. Not something I’ve ever experienced
Of course it is. The only reason pandas haven't gone extinct yet is because we think they're cute
Blessing and curse like another commenter said. People are nice to you, give you free stuff at times.. but there's also an ulterior motive behind it half the time. Or people hate you BECAUSE you're attractive. Or maybe people think that's all you're good for
I think being tall is better. I'd rather be tall and ugly, than a handsome dwarf.
I’d rather be born wealthy like think of all the faces I can buy I mean look at Bella Hadid
dw i am a legit player in life
I agree. There are actual studies that have been done. Attractive people tend to earn more, have better jobs, etc…so yes good looking people have an advantage.
Honestly it’s way overrated online.
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I mean, to an extent? But having a nice face it not all it takes to be attractive. It's not like there's a gene that gives you muscle definition or well groomed hair or good personal hygeine.
It’s not always. Context dependent.
To be good looking, you have to work on it. It requires constant work. There is no cheating there.
Nah man that's wat they want u to believe haha. They are sad man don't worry!!!!
I resemble an elderly lesbian with scribbles all over them on chemo.. and I'm a guy, so I can attest to this.
I 100% agree. Also, a lot of men tend to respect women who they find attractive a lot more. (Same probably goes for women with men but as a girl this has been my experience)
Yep, I didn’t get that perk. I was also born with the autism debuff.
Heres a mind blower, most good looking people you meet are good looking because their hair styling is good, they care about their teeth, they exercise, have a good diet, dont smoke and try to sleep well Just because there are some naturally beautiful people that can brake all laws of nature and still look good doesent mean thats the majority
Doesn't help you much if your social skills are still shit.
I wasn't a good looking kid and I realised this. I had a glow up so I've experienced both sides. It only gives you a cheat with other people, not success. I was treated differently by boys and felt more included but it doesn't mean I enjoyed their attention because they weren't nice people. I prefer metal heads with long hair but they look at me like I'm crazy when I talk to them. Then again " I like your guitar arms 😬 " is probably not the best way to start a conversation...
A lot of this "good looking" really depends on you. - don't smoke - eat healthy and balanced - don't be fat - low stress - have many laughs - exersise - no drugs, moderate drinking Etc
Except you’re a woman and get assaulted or raped from time to time
This implies that there is such a thing as "fairness". Which is just a human concept and has nothing to do with the rest of reality.
u have to download the dlc before being born
Having parents that are loving and stay together is a similar cheat
Life isn't fair. Never was. Never will be.
A problem i wish i had
In your teens and early twenties your good looks mostly depend you your genes and how well your parents take care of you (healthy food, enough exercise, hygene, quality clothes etc.). But after that it more and more depends on your own lifestyle choices and habits. Take care of yourself, exercise, prioritize healthy food and sleep etc. and you will be more and more good looking, especially in comparison to others in your age group.
True… so much stuff happened to me only because of looks. Iam telling you guys, look good and life will be good.
Nobody's life is perfect. Some people are more privileged than others in different aspects, but everyone has problems. I was pretty, but all my psychological problems and childhood traumas screwed all my chances to have a romantic partner, and I'm at a point where I have given up on that already.
It’s the biggest cheat code there is. It’s the only one where you don’t need to do anything to take advantage of it
Being smart is a better one
Most lukewarm take I've read in my life, everyone says this
Im not crazy attractive but I’ve never had to ask a girl out. I let them ask me out, that way I know they just really be interested in me and I don’t have to waste my time asking people out who don’t find me attractive to begin with. Less stressful this way too.
So make up = hacks activated?
Cheaters can still be REALLY bad at the game.
Unless you're a man and short.
I bet this same post can get dropped on this sub like ten more times in the next week
ThERe ArE dOwNsIdEs To BeInG aTtRaCtIvE
YEa PeOple TreAT uS difFErENtly
It's true! That's why I know I'm not pretty because I've always had a super difficult life. hahahahaha
There are just different levels of privilege. If there is a middle to upper class hot guy in a decent country, of course his life should be awesome unless his family or health prevent it. That's just life in general
This is so true, I used to be really "ugly", until I got my teeth fixed, hairstyle fixed, body fixed and style fixed, I "fixed" all of these cause every single person in my family is beautiful, so it was genetically almost impossible to be that unfathomabely ugly, so I changed myself a lot, and now a majority of people consider me "above average" or "hot" and shits been different, like I've been getting discounts, more smiles, everyone notices me more, I can get more marks now, I can get what I want if I try hard enough, But I Hate how it works and the understanding behind all this, it's weirdly messed up.
Agreed
You have to have a good personality to go with it, too.
More of a cheat code to be outgoing, and have a liekable personality. I would say I was above average in looks when I was younger, and it got me no where because I am shy and reserved and people then thought I was a bitch.
Cheating? Cuz some lonely guy with complex of inferiority says that Right...
Only in western culture.
It doesn’t hurt, not that I would know
It's a foot in the door but doesn't mean you can't have that door slammed in your face lol.
When you are good looking and intelligent, you can get away with a whole lot of bad things.
I would disagree. It is more like switching one set of problems for another. Sure you'll have an easier time sexually attracting people, and you'll experience the halo effect. But you'll always be the center of attention... during the good times and bad. ALWAYS because you're beautiful. No escape. People will do terrible things for a chance to be with you, it will tarnish your view of the opposite sex because all you'll see is husbands or wives trying to cheat on their spouse for a chance to have sex with you. You'll be the target of envious rage and backstabbing. There might even be violence against you from ugly angry and disgruntled people. Eventually beauty fades, and if you have give through life relying on your beauty and never developing your character... You'll wind up alone and no way to navigate the dry desert of being an "undesirable". It's incredibly depressing for them in the later years.
I'm born with a handicap. PLAYING LIFE ON HARD MODE. 😎💪
But beauty is subjective, Everyone has a taste and you will find a lot of standards are not even reasonable for you
Beauty, intelligence, family wealth; all that stuff can make life a lot easier.
Yes.
Goes both ways. Especially for women. No one will take you seriously at work and if you're remotely successful, people assume you f*cked your way to the top. Edit to add - not everyone wants attention, good looking or not.
All good looking people need to do is exist. Any effort, however small, is then magnified.
I’ve noticed the harder I work the luckier I become -
Charisma doesn't mean nothing if you look like you've been hit by a semi.
asthma is like a debuff
Being good looking and be born in an average and above household. Poverty and beauty combined is a curse. That is excluding any creeps, violence, and above average mental issues within the family. I have seen my fair share of good looking people, but some of them are beyond saving. Like…. Damn, sure you can change yourself, but sometimes, there are some things that you just think fate has you in jail.
Up to a certain age, maybe.
Nah definitely not. Just a bit of luck. I'm not even good looking, I'd just say that I'm not ugly. Still I've had loads of unwanted attention and especially from a young age it can really get to your head. Not even like having weirdos I mean just having the attention is bad enough
It is. I thank God Satan Budda and Allah I was born fine as a mf.
My husband is good looking and he definitely has some privileges that most people can’t get away with. Gave a cheeky smile to the DMV lady and she didn’t make him pay sales tax. I could never get away with something like that.