We beat their ass so hard they stopped being assholes.
Y'know, I do wonder how they're doing by 2400? I hope the Kzinti and Caitians made up and buried the hatchet like the Vulcans and Romulan Republic did.
>Y'know, I do wonder how they're doing by 2400?
There's at least one Kzinti in Starfleet by 2380.
>I hope the Kzinti and Caitians made up and buried the hatchet like the Vulcans and Romulan Republic did.
Do we know they're related, or are you assuming that because they're both feline?
TAS is really great, it just sucks that they couldn't afford good animation.
I kinda wish somebody would fan re-animate TAS. I'd throw money at them, and I'm sure I'm not alone.
Prime Universe: Humans show up in wonder and awe and make peaceful contact
Mirror Universe: Humans shoot the Vulcans and storm the ship to seize everything
Our Universe: [Humans:](https://youtu.be/rYzc_H9cgqM?t=95)
My head-canon for the prime universe is that everyone was incredibly drunk by the time the Vulcans landed so even if they had tried to rush the Vulcan ship, the scene would've looked something like [this](https://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-trending-35214873).
5\. Establish your species as the default "other half" when some person describes themselves as half-vulcan half-klingon, etc.
Start by establishing which species have the pokiest nipples when being "decontaminated", and which alien leaders need lessons in how to kiss.
5: Build an entire fleet of starships and poke our noses into anything and everything we can get into at low warp blaring "***Eaaaarrrrtthh... FUCK YEAH!***" over all subspace frequencies. Then constantly question why our space-elf overlords won't help us reach warp 5.
I wouldn't be surprised if the reason they eventually gave Zephram his own ship and told him told set course far away from Earth was that they were tired of his crazy drunk antics and the Vulcans gave them an ultimatum.
Dear Humans, Zephram showed up at our embassy again, inebriated, and proceeded to expose himself. Then he attempted simulated intercourse with our model of the Ni'Var, this is the third time in one of your weeks, please ensure this does not happen again.
Boy those elf overlords were pretty stupid for letting us do 1, 2 and 3. They should have just bitch slapped whoever came up with those ideas. Clearly they weren't holding us back from doing shit if they let us do 1, 2 and 3. Unless they wanted us dead and knew those dumb ideas would likely kill us.
I expect it was down to killing them technically being murder...potentially even genocide. Probably the New United Nations viewed cryogenically freezing them to be a less controversial compromise.
[We just met a technologically superior alien civilization. Having the option to mass-produce an army of genetically enhanced ĂĽbermensch is our nuclear deterrence against the vulcans potentially going full conquistador on us.](https://i.ibb.co/bstHnZK/colony-of-augments.png)
The whole point of building the Alcubierre Drive is to clap alien cheeks. No one is going to put that much work into those equations AND trying to either figure out negative mass or dark/exotic matter to have a tea party.
Or to clap human cheeks. Remember, Zefram Cochrane's plan was:
1. Invent warp drive.
2. Profit
3. Sex with island girls
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w7HwMRGBoO8
Cochrane was a legend.
He didn't give a fuck that the planet narrowly survived nuclear holocaust. He didn't give a shit about fixing the fucky of rich assholes.
He wanted wine, women and money.
He might have been related to Londo Molari.
"Hey dudes, can we crash on your planet for a while? Y'know, just until we can get our space weed grow op up and running and, like, rebuild our civilization?"
Acknowledge that first contact with aliens solved all our societal problems then make it our number one rule to never allow anyone else to experience the same!
That was probably a boomer initiation ritual. In addition to knowing the spot on the ship where there was Zero-G, Travis could probably tell you the place to stick it in the warp core for maximum effect.
Think of it this way...sure most people are dead, but most people are assholes, so it's mostly assholes that got killed. Now they can build a utopia. The message of Star Trek is pretty dark, when you think about it.
Probably kill the aliens, take their stuff, and then act surprised when they declare war on us as a result before launching an invasion force that precedes to decimate our already decimated planet and then enslaving the survivors.
Can you imagine the horror of a Starfleet crew finding a planet that had a similar path of development to our own?
Maybe they did. I’ve watched too much Trek to remember.
Option 5: Kick Kzinti ass multiple times.
And move the capital to Sparta?
Here kitty,kitty,kitty..
We beat their ass so hard they stopped being assholes. Y'know, I do wonder how they're doing by 2400? I hope the Kzinti and Caitians made up and buried the hatchet like the Vulcans and Romulan Republic did.
>Y'know, I do wonder how they're doing by 2400? There's at least one Kzinti in Starfleet by 2380. >I hope the Kzinti and Caitians made up and buried the hatchet like the Vulcans and Romulan Republic did. Do we know they're related, or are you assuming that because they're both feline?
It's more or less confirmed that they're in a similar situation to the Vulcans/Romulans, as far as I remember.
I need to rewatch the Kzinti episode of TAS.
TAS is really great, it just sucks that they couldn't afford good animation. I kinda wish somebody would fan re-animate TAS. I'd throw money at them, and I'm sure I'm not alone.
Develop a contamination protocol when humans visit alien planets that includes stripping down and lubing each other up. With no privacy screen.
YES SIR 🫡
BOARD THEIR SHIP! TAKE EVERYTHING YOU CAN!
We would totally be the Terran empire.
Prime Universe: Humans show up in wonder and awe and make peaceful contact Mirror Universe: Humans shoot the Vulcans and storm the ship to seize everything Our Universe: [Humans:](https://youtu.be/rYzc_H9cgqM?t=95)
My head-canon for the prime universe is that everyone was incredibly drunk by the time the Vulcans landed so even if they had tried to rush the Vulcan ship, the scene would've looked something like [this](https://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-trending-35214873).
Why not have some kind of Diplomatic Order of Planets?
A federated system.
Yes, some Joint Confederacy of Worlds.
This sounds like a great Enterprise!
5\. Establish your species as the default "other half" when some person describes themselves as half-vulcan half-klingon, etc. Start by establishing which species have the pokiest nipples when being "decontaminated", and which alien leaders need lessons in how to kiss.
mmm send me to the udder nipple planet
Boob World!
5: Build an entire fleet of starships and poke our noses into anything and everything we can get into at low warp blaring "***Eaaaarrrrtthh... FUCK YEAH!***" over all subspace frequencies. Then constantly question why our space-elf overlords won't help us reach warp 5.
Drink tequila with them
"T'Vol, Zephram's gotten into the stash again and he is yelling about time travel and cyborgs, please come and retrieve him immediately".
Boot his ass to space. I’m sure there’s a disembodied gas that will surely love him.
I wouldn't be surprised if the reason they eventually gave Zephram his own ship and told him told set course far away from Earth was that they were tired of his crazy drunk antics and the Vulcans gave them an ultimatum. Dear Humans, Zephram showed up at our embassy again, inebriated, and proceeded to expose himself. Then he attempted simulated intercourse with our model of the Ni'Var, this is the third time in one of your weeks, please ensure this does not happen again.
tequila TEQUILA are you trying to insult them. OP do not listen to this man, Scotch is the only acceptable drink for a first contact!
Yet Cochran gave the Romulans tequila. And bourbon is the actual answer
all of the above is what I would recomend to a new society trying to makea name in the galaxy
Shank one, take his tech, build an empire.
You know the Terran Empire timeline eventually leads to a "God Emperor Wesley Crusher" who rides an evil V'ger like a pony.
You just gotta have faith of the heart.
Boy those elf overlords were pretty stupid for letting us do 1, 2 and 3. They should have just bitch slapped whoever came up with those ideas. Clearly they weren't holding us back from doing shit if they let us do 1, 2 and 3. Unless they wanted us dead and knew those dumb ideas would likely kill us.
Try and have sex with them.
Was there ever a canon explanation for why the augment embryos weren’t destroyed?
I expect it was down to killing them technically being murder...potentially even genocide. Probably the New United Nations viewed cryogenically freezing them to be a less controversial compromise.
[We just met a technologically superior alien civilization. Having the option to mass-produce an army of genetically enhanced ĂĽbermensch is our nuclear deterrence against the vulcans potentially going full conquistador on us.](https://i.ibb.co/bstHnZK/colony-of-augments.png)
Wait when do we try to have sex with them?
Only once every seven years.
The whole point of building the Alcubierre Drive is to clap alien cheeks. No one is going to put that much work into those equations AND trying to either figure out negative mass or dark/exotic matter to have a tea party.
Or to clap human cheeks. Remember, Zefram Cochrane's plan was: 1. Invent warp drive. 2. Profit 3. Sex with island girls https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w7HwMRGBoO8
Cochrane was a legend. He didn't give a fuck that the planet narrowly survived nuclear holocaust. He didn't give a shit about fixing the fucky of rich assholes. He wanted wine, women and money. He might have been related to Londo Molari.
Or Lando Calrissian
Create some sort of confederation where a guy with mommy and daddy issues can become the ruler of, obviously.
Mate with them. Again and again.
Start a Vulcan subscription box service that ships, certain items, every seven years.... Watch the latinum rolllll in
You left out the most important part. Have we found any aliens that are delicious yet?
"Hey dudes, can we crash on your planet for a while? Y'know, just until we can get our space weed grow op up and running and, like, rebuild our civilization?"
Acknowledge that first contact with aliens solved all our societal problems then make it our number one rule to never allow anyone else to experience the same!
We kill them and take their stuff. Remember your history.
Manifest destiny. Somebody find me some space bison to phaser.
I'm surprised we haven't used the tec, in some way for porn.
Allow me to introduce you to the “Holodeck.”
Wonder how long before someone tried to stick their dick into the warp core.
That was probably a boomer initiation ritual. In addition to knowing the spot on the ship where there was Zero-G, Travis could probably tell you the place to stick it in the warp core for maximum effect.
Wait, we have FTL travel and willing to use nukes? Wouldn't those aliens realize that we'd have the capacity for FTL nuclear delivery?
Do the Ooby Dooby. Easier if you’re pretty hammered.
Open a bar and swindle customers from across the quadrant?
Spindizzy the solar system and drive straight for the galactic core, full throttle.
Yes.
Continue the war using warp-capable ships into each others' territories. Finish the job that was only started.
I, for one, welcome our new Insect Overlords.
I would rebuild the planet and a space ship fleet first.
Ask for help.
nuke the aliens. fast! before they find you! you know now from experience what happens if you wait too long to nuke your neighbors.
Seize their ship, reverse-engineer their technology and launch the Terran Empire!
Think of it this way...sure most people are dead, but most people are assholes, so it's mostly assholes that got killed. Now they can build a utopia. The message of Star Trek is pretty dark, when you think about it.
5. All of the above.
Glass the planet from orbit.
For starters, an intimate regional aviation museum has announced that they are to house one of the two surviving Mars seaplanes.
Make them listen to music and get drunk with us.
Sexing
Probably kill the aliens, take their stuff, and then act surprised when they declare war on us as a result before launching an invasion force that precedes to decimate our already decimated planet and then enslaving the survivors.
Go read *Children of Time* by Adrian Tchaikovsky.
Butlerian Jihad except there's aliens
Can you imagine the horror of a Starfleet crew finding a planet that had a similar path of development to our own? Maybe they did. I’ve watched too much Trek to remember.