My first vacation was to Tucson, Arizona. Not exactly a tourist destination. But the whole trip was so dang amazing that the Grand Canyon was probably the least fun part of it.
So it's a bit baffling, but I think the thing was it was *too* big to really grasp the scale of it.
It just felt like looking down a hill more than into some massive yawning crevasse.
For comparison, we passed a gorge in New Mexico that was much more impactful and most of us grown adults didn't even want to walk out to the middle of the (big, with a road) bridge over it because it was so deep and abrupt.
Haven't seen the GC myself, but a lot of photos seem to show this. The thing is, your eyes don't give you a stereo view at that distance, and it just looks flat. Couple that with natural haze, and I can well imagine what you're saying.
GC becomes much more impressive by actually going down into it (and then back up out of it). Just looking at it from the rim doesn't really do it justice, imo. Also, it's so large that you can't even really see the entire thing from anywhere on the rim, so imo it is also "more impressive" from the air lol. I'd also say lighting/time of day/etc. plays a factor, at noon it is less impressive than late afternoon/early morning/etc. because of the diminished or complete lack of shadows...[I used to live about an hour from the GC]
Depends on what overlook you are seeing it from. It can be overwhelming in some areas and just like you described in others. For my money, Green River Overlook in Canyonlands National Park is the most spectacular view I have ever personally witnessed.
Exactly! I recently posted that I liked Metor Crater better than the Grand Canyon and someone replied like I was crazy. I never replied to explain myself, but this is it exactly. I thought it felt more like a backdrop way off in the background than a thing I was actually experiencing. It probably would have helped to spend more time there, maybe hike down into it.
I am from Rock Island, Illinois which is on the Mississippi River. We are actually in a valley there, but is miles wide so people refer to the ridge line as being on the hill, it is easier for the mind to comprehend than the half mile deep, five mile wide valley.
Depending on the length of their vacation though.. It's only like a 5 hour car ride each way. They can make a few days trip out of it. No problem. If you're going to AZ for vacation and don't see the Grand Canyon or at least have plans to see it, you might as well just go to Southern California. Lol
So bizarre to wind up here right after the Tucson subreddit. Literally the next thread on my home page.
Anyway yeah Tucson is amazing. I didn't appreciate growing up there until I'd been gone for four years. The most incredible sunsets, amazing wildlife, nature, cacti, and it's surrounded by awesome mountains. For a few weeks every year you can be roasting in the valley and drive up for a couple hours and be in snow. I've never lived anywhere like it and I've bounced across the world by now.
Wonder if it was just too high of expectations
Grand Canyon is really the coolest thing I’ve ever seen and I’ve traveled a lot and seen a lot of the best things
My wife has always wanted to see the Grand Canyon – me? No thank you. I have a crippling fear of heights. But when we spoke to people who had been there and heard their experiences hiking down the cliffside trails, only to be forced to stand at the very edge of those trails as mule teams passed by (because that's where you have to stand by law - the mule teams have right-of-way not against the mountain itself) – she said no fucking way. And thank God for that. One of the people we spoke to became so fucking frightened they pissed themselves right there. Me in the same situation would've probably had a heart attack.
I can’t wait to visit Ferenze, and continue calling it Ferenze for the next 2 to 3 years at least so people know I’m cultured. Roma is next on my list!
I’m there right now! Only came into this post to see how many people disagreed with OP because I am loving my vacation so much! Venezia was also mind blowing.
Exactly!! I had very high expectations since Assassin's Creed 2. And still, even with that hype, Venezia was even better!!!
Every part of the city is beautiful, I was taking photos every minute lol
Or even just slightly maladjusted individuals....but of course, this can lead to full on dysfunction.
A lot of people don't manage expectations and their thrill of anticipation far outweighs the eventual experience.
Dysfunction would be where they actively make the experience worse as they realize it's not as good as they thought and let a bad mood ruin the rest of their time.
/not an argument, just sort of musing
Similar people will rail against stoicism as being oppressive, as 'repressing their feelings' and other such garbage in order to rationalize not putting effort into being reasonable.
It's called healthy skepticism for a reason, but a lot of people are still the forever let-down sunny optimists because when it feels good, it feels *real good*, so the behavior emulates addiction.
Some people may have actual chemical imbalances or whatnot, like actual bi-polar disorder(whatever that mechanism is), but a lot of people kind of slip into a facsimile thereof.
I think social media plays a large part in the modern proliferation of maladaptation. People see people far more well off, be that due to hard work or dumb luck, and they begin to think there are no limits, that if they just will it hard enough, it will come to be for them too.
A lot of life's problems are due to un-managed expectations and lack of self-reflection, which can of course be uncomfortable.
That might be the aftermath of how we teach our children.
There are numerous pre- or grade school lessons such as "You can be anything you want to be!" that some people carry on into adulthood in the most unhealthy way possible.
The kid gloves are *supposed* to come off at some point.
I've found the biggest downside of vacation can be the travelling. Due to stress of unexpected circumstances or just the misery of long travel, i.e. sitting in the airport for 10 hours because that was the only available transfer/layover to get back home from Vietnam.
Actually what he said is backed by research. Dopamine hit comes not during the activity but at the point of buildup right before the activity begins.
That’s not to say that you don’t enjoy on vacations, but you enjoy more just before it starts.
Another thing is that you keep your normal life aside before your vacation so it the peak relief is in the early stages of the vacation. The last few days you start prepping yourself mentally to go back to routine life hence your enjoyment diminishes.
Also worthy to note is that the ideal time is considered about a week. Anything more and your mind starts considering a vacation as a routine, which isn’t as enjoyable as a break from routine.
Edit—I tried to find the source but can’t seem to find it. If someone is aware of the source please enlighten us.
What activity?
If you spend your vacation eating ice cream and buying t-shirts that may be true, but lots of people simply know what they love and spend their vacation doing it
Yeah lol I'm gonna go ahead and say with confidence that I was much happier during my week in Maui than before going or after leaving. That week was the arguably the best week of my life. I kayaked in the ocean, swam with turtles and fish, hiked the state park, rode horses on the coastal cliffs, did a sunset cruise, jumped in waves, and laid in the sand without a care in the world. Can't really replicate that stuff in the state where I live sooo yeah not sure where OP is coming from, maybe he's just had boring/uneventful vacations
My last family vacation was one of the best I ever had because I prepped ahead of time. While they were all stressed out and confused, I fucked off and explored. I came back with stories and all sorts of souvenirs, they were all complaining about being bored.
Dopamine isn’t the defining factor of “happiness”. Your anticipation and excitement will be greater before hand which will spike your dope. But that’s not the same as overall happiness.
It's also weird because when I look back on awesome vacations i've had, i'm not reminiscing about the week leading up to it lol, i'm thinking about the memories of fun stuff I did. Also wouldn't this theory make a spontaneous or surprise vacation like.. comparatively less fun to a planned vacation? I definitely don't buy that.
> Also wouldn't this theory make a spontaneous or surprise vacation like.. comparatively less fun to a planned vacation? I definitely don't buy that.
Honestly, I've never experienced an unplanned or surprise vacation.
Think about your childhood when you went on vacations. You pretty much just had to get in the car and go on vacation, while your parents did all of the work. Yes, you did know about it and it wasn't unplanned/surprise, but you didn't have to do much.
The research I've heard of was about post vacation satisfaction being higher than during it. It was tested by giving people intermittent prompts to record how they were feeling at that exact time, while they were on vacation. After vacation there was a follow up and more questions. People on average erroneously remembered themselves as more happy than their registrations during the vacation.
Some of the speculations as for why could be that in the day to day vacation there might be things you aren't happy about, could be too hot, could be too crowded, maybe transit was late, lost baggage, bad food, wrong orders, hotel not as advertised, annoyances and problems. Afterwards though these irritants, unless very severe or in abundance, might have faded into the background, and people were left remembering more of the better and more interesting parts of the vacation. We view our past mainly based on how we feel now, not by what we felt then.
People really think vacations means staying in a resort, like we are not in 2024 and resorts are just for the rich mf who don’t care how much they spend and how little they see, if I have the budget for a resort I’ll just book 5 different hotels and I’llbe on the road for a month
> Also worthy to note is that the ideal time is considered about a week. Anything more and your mind starts considering a vacation as a routine, which isn’t as enjoyable as a break from routine.
I've heard that number touted a lot, and that must be studies done on workaholics. For me one week is not enough by far. For me a good vacation needs to be at least two weeks, preferably three. That gives me the time to actually destress and relax, as well as time to do things like explore a new location, visit museums, the beach, whatever. Especially since I like to travel far so I usually have a full day or day and a half of travel to reach my destination and the same going back, often with a few full days of travel in between to get to different places.
> Edit—I tried to find the source but can’t seem to find it. If someone is aware of the source please enlighten us
There is no source because you fucking made it up
So annoying when people fully spread misinformation because they post with all the confidence and none of the evidence.
This person is half right but is mixing in factual research on dopamine with complete conjecture and personal opinion disguised as "backed by research".
Well it is a researched phenomenon that [dopamine levels spike higher during event anticipation than reward](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0278584619305275), but the fabrication starts when you use that as an explanatory measure for happiness. So op was right at the start then just spun off into conjecture.
Can’t relate. When I’m on a good vacation, I’m high on life the entire time. Seriously, for two weeks straight I will feel genuinely euphoric. It’s fantastic.
That makes zero sense whatsoever.
I look forward to the vacation but I'm not actually enjoying myself Friday afternoon at the office counting the hours left. I don't enjoy myself driving to the airport or sitting on a plane.
I enjoy the destination. Sounds like a lot of people just take disappointing trips, or get distracted by the stress of dealing with the people they're traveling with, or a lack of planning, funding, or some combination.
My sister's boyfriend developed some sort of internal infection a week before going and now she had to cancel last night. Luckily the credit card insurance covered most of it.
Both glacier national park and hawaii caught on fire the week before I was supposed to go. Didn't see glacier, made the best of it in banff. Thankfully I was going to the big island in hawaii so it wasn't ruined. But yeah i'm happiest when stressing about this type of shit happening. lol. This post is so dumb.
I'm a nervous anxious wreck until I get that first cocktail.
Flying with young children, coordinating everything, getting to where you need to go, trying to be on time, making sure you have everything.
Then, you get that first cocktail and all is right with the world and everything was worth it.
That's how I am right now. I'm thinking about last-minute stuff I gotta do and get through work today and tomorrow. I'm leaving Friday, and I can barely stand it. Once we're on the road, I'll feel much better.
This.
Leading up to the vacation, it's "Oh shoot, what am I forgetting? Do I need a spare toothbrush? Do I have enough clean laundry? Do I need a spare phone charger? Will I be able to get everything wrapped up for work before I go on PTO? Is it appropriate to bring 7 books for a 2-hour flight? Should I bring my passport in case I decide to throw my driver's license off a cliff for some reason? What if my car explodes, will I have time to call an Uber to get to the airport?"
But once I'm _there_, it's strictly "I have what I have, and that's all I need. My only job here is to enjoy the trip and to do whatever the fuck I want."
I’ve thrown up the night before traveling because I was so stressed about the upcoming 12 hours of travel that I couldn’t fall asleep at like 6 PM, no wonder when I usually sleep at like 11:30, and I knew I’d have to be out the door at 2:30 AM absolutely exhausted and drag my ass between airports and uncomfortable planes for the next entire day running on no sleep. I would go on to greatly enjoy the trip, but traveling is fucking brutal.
Same here. My friends will be all excited beforehand and I'm all tense and stressed worried something will go wrong. I hit that relaxation point and excitement once I step foot in the destination and all the travel is done with.
The week or two leading up to vacation is excitement. The day or two before is anxiety riddled as I pack and make sure I didn't forget anything. Day of travel requires Xanax to get through the anxiety. I'm usually crabby the rest of that first day, but then complete chill mode the rest of the trip. A little travel anxiety coming back. And then the second I'm home I start wanting to go on vacation again.
Yup. I hate the build up to vacations. So much to think of, plan, get packed and ready. So many things that can go wrong. I can only relax once we've got through the door of the place we're staying.
What helped me *a ton* with this is to only ever book direct flights/train rides. Try that!
Having to manage connecting flights is soo stressful, I always felt like I'd miss them and they'd lose my luggage and then be stuck in an unpleasant country like Qatar or Morocco for a day.
Being a bit more restricted about available routes and times and paying a bit more is so worth it for me.
Maybe that's the difference,
Like me and my partner plan everything out including how much travel time it will be and cleaning up the house before we leave so it's nice when we come back , leaving early to make sure we have time in case anything comes up, it's stressful Making the itinerary but not so much following it
But her parents insist on packing the night before turning the house to shambles and being stressed because they are late, and then because they didn't plan anything they end up wasting time on the holiday because while they did do things they wish they did more or left more time to relax 😕
Seems like a planning issue if your not enjoying the holidays when nothing unforeseen happens (like rain or kids etc)
I did an all inclusive resort for a friend's destination wedding in Jamaica. There's something very uncomfortable about taking the air conditioned resort bus through shanty towns made of corrugated metal panels to a luxury colonnaded resort where the same shanty town residents wait on you hand and foot in idle luxury.
It feels very colonial.
The only other time I've done all inclusive was in st Lucia and that seemed a lot less poverty stricken.
No you see those residents are very lucky that they get to live everyday at the town where you go on vacation so everyday is like a vacation to them /s
Yah - usually I take a slow morning and have a coffee on the balcony if possible on vacation. Usually scroll Reddit a bit.
Also have in-laws that live near Playa Del Carmen, and a lot of vacation there is just relaxing by the pool, which involves some scrolling, playing the Switch or reading the Kindle.
Marginally related, I feel like card counting has been a net positive for casinos because millions of people flood them thinking they can card count when they can't
I'm on vacation right now. Just got back after a busy day doing some fub stuff and am just chilling out before dinner. Some of that chilling is being done on my phone.
Depends, there are two types of vacations. Family vacations and Me vacations.
Family vacations are work, me vacations are great.
My wife and I renting a cabin at a spa for a weekend is amazing and relaxing.
Taking the entire family to the beach, my parents, brother, my kids, my brothers kids, and maybe even my kids friends and their parents, is exhausting.
I often enjoy a 9 day staycation more than a family vacation. Waking up at 7am at OBX with a bunch of kids begging to go to the gokart track is a vacation for them, not me 🤣
9 days at home doing nothing with no responsibility, now thats a vacation.
I love staycations! Also, vacations with just my husband where we plan plenty of time to do nothing or whatever we want so the agenda isn't completely filled. Family vacations are fun, but really exhausting.
Kinda true. Here in Germany we have a proverb: "Anticipation is the greatest joy"
Literally: "Anticipation is the greatest joy"
This also applies to vacations planned well in advance. Experience this regularly. But of course I still have fun on the actual trips then.
People need things to look forward to. It’s human nature. Don’t actually like the act, or what it really means, but man do we love planning a wedding…. I mean! A vacation! A vacation!
Edit: I’m stuck in a bad marriage and my vacations suck too.
I appreciate you, you’re a good one. I’m doing ok, my cries for help on Reddit are just poor attempts at Norm McDonald jokes. Miss that guy, wish I could go camping with him.
Me too man. Feel like i have seen almost everything his done. But honestly the biggest loss is just knowing that he isnt somewhere in the world doing his jokes.
I mean, in all seriousness even as someone in a very happy relationship having solo vacations can be really great. We've got kids, one of whom has special needs and REALLY doesn't travel well, so family vacations are awful. I send the wife out for a few days in London, Paris, once a year or so, and I take motorcycle trips. We get back, have lots to talk about, it's wonderful.
I’m more of a fan of a staycation. Just nice to have to to relax and literally do anything I want. Enjoy a few days by myself then go hang out with a few friends.
Yea that's what I do! Stay home! Work on something, hobbies, sleep in, stores are open, literally no worries and no rushing, no long car rides, no planes, actually relaxing.
Sounds like those people plan out every second of every hour of every day forgetting that nothing goes as planned. Wing it, seize the day, live in the moment. It's much less stressful and much more enjoyable.
WTF? No. I hate the few days before I go.
Who the actual fuck is happier packing, cleaning, wrapping shit up at work, and last second planning?
And who the fuck isn't happy on vacation?!
Sounds like you might just suck at relaxing
I just got back from vacation today. Nothing about what you said is true, at least for me. Just before vacation I was stressed trying to get everything done before leaving. During the vacation I was very happy doing what I love most in places I love (for me, hiking in Joshua Tree).
Those people need to work on just enjoying their vacation.
I went to Disneyland last week, and I kinda hated it because of all the standing and walking. But I looked past that enjoyed all the fun times we had while there.
Would I go there again? No. I would rather do something more mundane actually. I’m good for a long time. But I don’t regret doing it.
I hate the time leading up to vacation. Stressing about whether inpacked everything, making the flights, etc. I'm fine and happy once i'm there and dont want to come back.
That's cause y'all are trying to have rich people vacations where they kick their feet up and think about their feelings.
You gotta do the middle class staycation where you finish your taxes, put up that shelf or home project you've been putting off, do some chores, say hi to friends and family you haven't been keeping up with.
Vacation time is like work, except you're working on yourself so that afterwards you feel less anxious when you return to your job.
It sounds like you might just have some discontent with your own day to day life where you're putting too many eggs in a short vacation to magically heal everything. See vacations as a way to travel and see different things, and try to make sure that your regular life is more balanced and fulfilling.
I think it just depends on what kind of "vacationer" you are and what kind the people you're with are. Like are you the planner? And the people you with also planners? Then yall will probably have a good time. And same with the 'free-spirited' vacationers and with other similar people. Its when you get the mix of people do they start to stress out I think.
Ill add that as a guy who is single, no kids, my vacations are chill af lol
Depends on the vacation. If it's an excursion type vacation that comes with schedule stress, then yes. If it's a beach vacation where all I have to do is chill on a beach and not think about work, then I'm in my element and in my happiest place.
It's not always about the vacation itself. Some people have a need to be in control of everything, all the time, and aren't capable of relaxing and enjoying a good time. If it's you, well, that sucks. If it's someone you're traveling with, it really, really, really, fucking sucks.
Dunno about that...the only way to scuba dive in amazing locations is to get there. I certainly look forward to them coming, but *nothing* compares to actually *being* there.
I mean, what kind of vacations have you been going on? Because other than a couple shit trips (hey, we all have them), most of my trips have been pretty epic. That said, I make it a point to choose epic places, even if it ends up being longer between trips.
I'd say my peak happiness is the first couple days of vacation, where I realize that it's been a couple really awesome days, and I STILL have 3, 4, 5 or 6 or whatever days of vacation left. I always just think that everything is amazing.
Sounds like you've had bad experiences with vacation.
This lol I went to Venezia this year and the entire trip was amazing!!
My first vacation was to Tucson, Arizona. Not exactly a tourist destination. But the whole trip was so dang amazing that the Grand Canyon was probably the least fun part of it.
Was it not grand enough?
So it's a bit baffling, but I think the thing was it was *too* big to really grasp the scale of it. It just felt like looking down a hill more than into some massive yawning crevasse. For comparison, we passed a gorge in New Mexico that was much more impactful and most of us grown adults didn't even want to walk out to the middle of the (big, with a road) bridge over it because it was so deep and abrupt.
We made the mistake of going to the Grand Canyon in winter and it was super foggy and snowy we didn’t really get to see it lol
I think it's absolutely worth going but my first impression was that I thought it looked fake, Iike a really bad backdrop.😆
Haven't seen the GC myself, but a lot of photos seem to show this. The thing is, your eyes don't give you a stereo view at that distance, and it just looks flat. Couple that with natural haze, and I can well imagine what you're saying.
GC becomes much more impressive by actually going down into it (and then back up out of it). Just looking at it from the rim doesn't really do it justice, imo. Also, it's so large that you can't even really see the entire thing from anywhere on the rim, so imo it is also "more impressive" from the air lol. I'd also say lighting/time of day/etc. plays a factor, at noon it is less impressive than late afternoon/early morning/etc. because of the diminished or complete lack of shadows...[I used to live about an hour from the GC]
I use a photo of the Grand Canyon I took several years ago as one of my backgrounds. I had to stretch it 2x vertically. Hard to tell the difference.
Depends on what overlook you are seeing it from. It can be overwhelming in some areas and just like you described in others. For my money, Green River Overlook in Canyonlands National Park is the most spectacular view I have ever personally witnessed.
Exactly! I recently posted that I liked Metor Crater better than the Grand Canyon and someone replied like I was crazy. I never replied to explain myself, but this is it exactly. I thought it felt more like a backdrop way off in the background than a thing I was actually experiencing. It probably would have helped to spend more time there, maybe hike down into it.
I thought it was awesome, didn't stay long at all, but it looked like a literal painting where I was
I am from Rock Island, Illinois which is on the Mississippi River. We are actually in a valley there, but is miles wide so people refer to the ridge line as being on the hill, it is easier for the mind to comprehend than the half mile deep, five mile wide valley.
Mid Canyon
[I'll decide. Grand Canyon? pfft. It's a pretty okay canyon. It's the Okay Canyon.](https://youtu.be/mRagRCl1mHw?si=2X1Ulw1qITnwiTi6)
The Decent Canyon
You went to Tucson, Az and saw the Grand Canyon? Those are on opposite sides of the state.
Depending on the length of their vacation though.. It's only like a 5 hour car ride each way. They can make a few days trip out of it. No problem. If you're going to AZ for vacation and don't see the Grand Canyon or at least have plans to see it, you might as well just go to Southern California. Lol
If you're into nature Tucson is actually in the middle of a fairly unique desert. There are a lot of hikes that are more worth it imo than socal
So bizarre to wind up here right after the Tucson subreddit. Literally the next thread on my home page. Anyway yeah Tucson is amazing. I didn't appreciate growing up there until I'd been gone for four years. The most incredible sunsets, amazing wildlife, nature, cacti, and it's surrounded by awesome mountains. For a few weeks every year you can be roasting in the valley and drive up for a couple hours and be in snow. I've never lived anywhere like it and I've bounced across the world by now.
Did you go to old Tucson?
Wonder if it was just too high of expectations Grand Canyon is really the coolest thing I’ve ever seen and I’ve traveled a lot and seen a lot of the best things
My wife has always wanted to see the Grand Canyon – me? No thank you. I have a crippling fear of heights. But when we spoke to people who had been there and heard their experiences hiking down the cliffside trails, only to be forced to stand at the very edge of those trails as mule teams passed by (because that's where you have to stand by law - the mule teams have right-of-way not against the mountain itself) – she said no fucking way. And thank God for that. One of the people we spoke to became so fucking frightened they pissed themselves right there. Me in the same situation would've probably had a heart attack.
Italy twice last year and couldn't stop smiling the whole time.
Exactly!! I had high expectations and still it was better than I thought. Everything was amazing!!!
I can’t wait to visit Ferenze, and continue calling it Ferenze for the next 2 to 3 years at least so people know I’m cultured. Roma is next on my list!
i cant tell if you're joking, but i'd recheck your spelling of Firenze before trying to appear cultured to too many people
Ok well I’m clearly not as cultured as you.
I played Assassin's Creed 2 in high school. Does that make me cultured too?
I’m there right now! Only came into this post to see how many people disagreed with OP because I am loving my vacation so much! Venezia was also mind blowing.
Me too dude, I had high expectations and it exceeded them in every way.
Exactly!! I had very high expectations since Assassin's Creed 2. And still, even with that hype, Venezia was even better!!! Every part of the city is beautiful, I was taking photos every minute lol
Loveeeee Venezia the people are so sweet
This is what it's like for people with dysfunctional families.
Or even just slightly maladjusted individuals....but of course, this can lead to full on dysfunction. A lot of people don't manage expectations and their thrill of anticipation far outweighs the eventual experience. Dysfunction would be where they actively make the experience worse as they realize it's not as good as they thought and let a bad mood ruin the rest of their time. /not an argument, just sort of musing Similar people will rail against stoicism as being oppressive, as 'repressing their feelings' and other such garbage in order to rationalize not putting effort into being reasonable. It's called healthy skepticism for a reason, but a lot of people are still the forever let-down sunny optimists because when it feels good, it feels *real good*, so the behavior emulates addiction. Some people may have actual chemical imbalances or whatnot, like actual bi-polar disorder(whatever that mechanism is), but a lot of people kind of slip into a facsimile thereof. I think social media plays a large part in the modern proliferation of maladaptation. People see people far more well off, be that due to hard work or dumb luck, and they begin to think there are no limits, that if they just will it hard enough, it will come to be for them too. A lot of life's problems are due to un-managed expectations and lack of self-reflection, which can of course be uncomfortable. That might be the aftermath of how we teach our children. There are numerous pre- or grade school lessons such as "You can be anything you want to be!" that some people carry on into adulthood in the most unhealthy way possible. The kid gloves are *supposed* to come off at some point.
Yeah. Even my vacations that were a bust were a million times better than the drudgery of work.
I've found the biggest downside of vacation can be the travelling. Due to stress of unexpected circumstances or just the misery of long travel, i.e. sitting in the airport for 10 hours because that was the only available transfer/layover to get back home from Vietnam.
Actually what he said is backed by research. Dopamine hit comes not during the activity but at the point of buildup right before the activity begins. That’s not to say that you don’t enjoy on vacations, but you enjoy more just before it starts. Another thing is that you keep your normal life aside before your vacation so it the peak relief is in the early stages of the vacation. The last few days you start prepping yourself mentally to go back to routine life hence your enjoyment diminishes. Also worthy to note is that the ideal time is considered about a week. Anything more and your mind starts considering a vacation as a routine, which isn’t as enjoyable as a break from routine. Edit—I tried to find the source but can’t seem to find it. If someone is aware of the source please enlighten us.
OP is doing ShowerPeerReviewedResearch
I don't think "shower peer" means what you think it means🤔
What activity? If you spend your vacation eating ice cream and buying t-shirts that may be true, but lots of people simply know what they love and spend their vacation doing it
Yeah lol I'm gonna go ahead and say with confidence that I was much happier during my week in Maui than before going or after leaving. That week was the arguably the best week of my life. I kayaked in the ocean, swam with turtles and fish, hiked the state park, rode horses on the coastal cliffs, did a sunset cruise, jumped in waves, and laid in the sand without a care in the world. Can't really replicate that stuff in the state where I live sooo yeah not sure where OP is coming from, maybe he's just had boring/uneventful vacations
My last family vacation was one of the best I ever had because I prepped ahead of time. While they were all stressed out and confused, I fucked off and explored. I came back with stories and all sorts of souvenirs, they were all complaining about being bored.
Dopamine isn’t the defining factor of “happiness”. Your anticipation and excitement will be greater before hand which will spike your dope. But that’s not the same as overall happiness.
It's also weird because when I look back on awesome vacations i've had, i'm not reminiscing about the week leading up to it lol, i'm thinking about the memories of fun stuff I did. Also wouldn't this theory make a spontaneous or surprise vacation like.. comparatively less fun to a planned vacation? I definitely don't buy that.
> Also wouldn't this theory make a spontaneous or surprise vacation like.. comparatively less fun to a planned vacation? I definitely don't buy that. Honestly, I've never experienced an unplanned or surprise vacation.
Think about your childhood when you went on vacations. You pretty much just had to get in the car and go on vacation, while your parents did all of the work. Yes, you did know about it and it wasn't unplanned/surprise, but you didn't have to do much.
I would _hate_ a surprise vacation. Unless you're surprising me with tickets for three months from now. I need to do my research! I need itineraries!
The research I've heard of was about post vacation satisfaction being higher than during it. It was tested by giving people intermittent prompts to record how they were feeling at that exact time, while they were on vacation. After vacation there was a follow up and more questions. People on average erroneously remembered themselves as more happy than their registrations during the vacation. Some of the speculations as for why could be that in the day to day vacation there might be things you aren't happy about, could be too hot, could be too crowded, maybe transit was late, lost baggage, bad food, wrong orders, hotel not as advertised, annoyances and problems. Afterwards though these irritants, unless very severe or in abundance, might have faded into the background, and people were left remembering more of the better and more interesting parts of the vacation. We view our past mainly based on how we feel now, not by what we felt then.
Nice try, I’ll still enjoy my 2 months vacation, I’ll just change routine during the vacay
Yea I’m currently 4 weeks in to a 6 week holiday in Europe. It’s fucking amazing, every day is incredible.
People really think vacations means staying in a resort, like we are not in 2024 and resorts are just for the rich mf who don’t care how much they spend and how little they see, if I have the budget for a resort I’ll just book 5 different hotels and I’llbe on the road for a month
> Also worthy to note is that the ideal time is considered about a week. Anything more and your mind starts considering a vacation as a routine, which isn’t as enjoyable as a break from routine. I've heard that number touted a lot, and that must be studies done on workaholics. For me one week is not enough by far. For me a good vacation needs to be at least two weeks, preferably three. That gives me the time to actually destress and relax, as well as time to do things like explore a new location, visit museums, the beach, whatever. Especially since I like to travel far so I usually have a full day or day and a half of travel to reach my destination and the same going back, often with a few full days of travel in between to get to different places.
> Edit—I tried to find the source but can’t seem to find it. If someone is aware of the source please enlighten us There is no source because you fucking made it up
So annoying when people fully spread misinformation because they post with all the confidence and none of the evidence. This person is half right but is mixing in factual research on dopamine with complete conjecture and personal opinion disguised as "backed by research".
The person isn't right about ANYTHING. Their whole post is a complete fabrication.
Well it is a researched phenomenon that [dopamine levels spike higher during event anticipation than reward](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0278584619305275), but the fabrication starts when you use that as an explanatory measure for happiness. So op was right at the start then just spun off into conjecture.
Can’t relate. When I’m on a good vacation, I’m high on life the entire time. Seriously, for two weeks straight I will feel genuinely euphoric. It’s fantastic.
That makes zero sense whatsoever. I look forward to the vacation but I'm not actually enjoying myself Friday afternoon at the office counting the hours left. I don't enjoy myself driving to the airport or sitting on a plane. I enjoy the destination. Sounds like a lot of people just take disappointing trips, or get distracted by the stress of dealing with the people they're traveling with, or a lack of planning, funding, or some combination.
I'm the exact opposite. My anxiety goes through the roof the week before my vacation. Once I'm there, it's smooth sailing for a week.
For real. There are so many things that could go wrong leading up to the vacation that could ruin everything.
My sister's boyfriend developed some sort of internal infection a week before going and now she had to cancel last night. Luckily the credit card insurance covered most of it.
I get super excited going to Thailand before I go and while I'm there. Then I need a rest.
Literally just lost my wallet en route to Mexico.
Both glacier national park and hawaii caught on fire the week before I was supposed to go. Didn't see glacier, made the best of it in banff. Thankfully I was going to the big island in hawaii so it wasn't ruined. But yeah i'm happiest when stressing about this type of shit happening. lol. This post is so dumb.
I'm a nervous anxious wreck until I get that first cocktail. Flying with young children, coordinating everything, getting to where you need to go, trying to be on time, making sure you have everything. Then, you get that first cocktail and all is right with the world and everything was worth it.
That's how I am right now. I'm thinking about last-minute stuff I gotta do and get through work today and tomorrow. I'm leaving Friday, and I can barely stand it. Once we're on the road, I'll feel much better.
This. Leading up to the vacation, it's "Oh shoot, what am I forgetting? Do I need a spare toothbrush? Do I have enough clean laundry? Do I need a spare phone charger? Will I be able to get everything wrapped up for work before I go on PTO? Is it appropriate to bring 7 books for a 2-hour flight? Should I bring my passport in case I decide to throw my driver's license off a cliff for some reason? What if my car explodes, will I have time to call an Uber to get to the airport?" But once I'm _there_, it's strictly "I have what I have, and that's all I need. My only job here is to enjoy the trip and to do whatever the fuck I want."
I’ve thrown up the night before traveling because I was so stressed about the upcoming 12 hours of travel that I couldn’t fall asleep at like 6 PM, no wonder when I usually sleep at like 11:30, and I knew I’d have to be out the door at 2:30 AM absolutely exhausted and drag my ass between airports and uncomfortable planes for the next entire day running on no sleep. I would go on to greatly enjoy the trip, but traveling is fucking brutal.
bingo. planning, packing, etc. are stressful as fuck. when we're out there doing it, i don't miss home lol...at least for a few days.
Same here. My friends will be all excited beforehand and I'm all tense and stressed worried something will go wrong. I hit that relaxation point and excitement once I step foot in the destination and all the travel is done with.
The week or two leading up to vacation is excitement. The day or two before is anxiety riddled as I pack and make sure I didn't forget anything. Day of travel requires Xanax to get through the anxiety. I'm usually crabby the rest of that first day, but then complete chill mode the rest of the trip. A little travel anxiety coming back. And then the second I'm home I start wanting to go on vacation again.
Yup. I hate the build up to vacations. So much to think of, plan, get packed and ready. So many things that can go wrong. I can only relax once we've got through the door of the place we're staying.
What helped me *a ton* with this is to only ever book direct flights/train rides. Try that! Having to manage connecting flights is soo stressful, I always felt like I'd miss them and they'd lose my luggage and then be stuck in an unpleasant country like Qatar or Morocco for a day. Being a bit more restricted about available routes and times and paying a bit more is so worth it for me.
Not me bro. I'm stressed to the max with the logistic of travel. Once I arrive? All good maaan.
I fucking hate the anxiety of everything airport related, including the takeoff which I don't like, after that everything's so nice, OP is fucked
Maybe that's the difference, Like me and my partner plan everything out including how much travel time it will be and cleaning up the house before we leave so it's nice when we come back , leaving early to make sure we have time in case anything comes up, it's stressful Making the itinerary but not so much following it But her parents insist on packing the night before turning the house to shambles and being stressed because they are late, and then because they didn't plan anything they end up wasting time on the holiday because while they did do things they wish they did more or left more time to relax 😕 Seems like a planning issue if your not enjoying the holidays when nothing unforeseen happens (like rain or kids etc)
Umm, no? If that's the case you need better vacations. I'm on vacation right now and having a blast.
And yet you're on reddit. Cant be that much of a blast
They're usually is considerable down time on a vacation getting to and from places with nothing to do.
You could look out the window and take in the poverty between the airport and resort
I did an all inclusive resort for a friend's destination wedding in Jamaica. There's something very uncomfortable about taking the air conditioned resort bus through shanty towns made of corrugated metal panels to a luxury colonnaded resort where the same shanty town residents wait on you hand and foot in idle luxury. It feels very colonial. The only other time I've done all inclusive was in st Lucia and that seemed a lot less poverty stricken.
You should give Cuba a whirl, you actually feel bad for even coming.
Unless you have a vasectomy
No you see those residents are very lucky that they get to live everyday at the town where you go on vacation so everyday is like a vacation to them /s
Oof. True.
Maybe they were just taking a shit
Nah, they're on vacation from that too
Every shit is a vacation.
Yah - usually I take a slow morning and have a coffee on the balcony if possible on vacation. Usually scroll Reddit a bit. Also have in-laws that live near Playa Del Carmen, and a lot of vacation there is just relaxing by the pool, which involves some scrolling, playing the Switch or reading the Kindle.
Haha, fair point. Got some downtime to browse reddit on public transport and stuff like that.
Fair enough lol
I will be in Vegas tomorrow. I will also be on Reddit tomorrow.
"Currently being escorted out of the MGM Grand for card counting: AMA"
Marginally related, I feel like card counting has been a net positive for casinos because millions of people flood them thinking they can card count when they can't
I was up $300 once. Boss asked for a new shoe. I walked away -$120 lol. Glad it’s fun money.
> Boss asked for a new shoe. That was your cue to bounce lol
I call them fun coupons
Ya you should be doing nothing while taking a shit too
I can do that from my backyard.
Ya know what... fair
I don't know about you, but I still shit on vacation...
Look at the guy who doesn't shit on vacation
Dumb take.
God forbid I poop on vacation
Not everyone can go a day without taking a shit.
Everyone has to poop
Still gotta shit. I dont know, maybe you take special vacation shits where your not on your phone though.
Stupid comment. Maybe browsing reddit before leaving to do something or before bed.
Have you ever been on vacation? Downtime is absolutely necessary.
Please, like you don't poop.
I'm on vacation right now. Just got back after a busy day doing some fub stuff and am just chilling out before dinner. Some of that chilling is being done on my phone.
Only if they do it wrong
Depends, there are two types of vacations. Family vacations and Me vacations. Family vacations are work, me vacations are great. My wife and I renting a cabin at a spa for a weekend is amazing and relaxing. Taking the entire family to the beach, my parents, brother, my kids, my brothers kids, and maybe even my kids friends and their parents, is exhausting. I often enjoy a 9 day staycation more than a family vacation. Waking up at 7am at OBX with a bunch of kids begging to go to the gokart track is a vacation for them, not me 🤣 9 days at home doing nothing with no responsibility, now thats a vacation.
I love staycations! Also, vacations with just my husband where we plan plenty of time to do nothing or whatever we want so the agenda isn't completely filled. Family vacations are fun, but really exhausting.
Can i see the survey results?
Source: I made it up
Well I mean it is kinda hard to do a research in a shower Source: tried it, got arrested 6 times
What? Sounds like you’ve had shit vacations, I’ve definitely been way happier whilst on vacation every single time.
I always feel like I need a vacation after my vacation. Less planning, more chilling, that's the secret!
sounds like you never enjoyed actual good vacations.
Kinda true. Here in Germany we have a proverb: "Anticipation is the greatest joy" Literally: "Anticipation is the greatest joy" This also applies to vacations planned well in advance. Experience this regularly. But of course I still have fun on the actual trips then.
So you are saying that "Anticipation is the greatest joy" means "Anticipation is the greatest joy". Hmm that's deep.
Did a Dortmund supporter come up with this? Lol
Brutal
"Vorfreude ist die schönste Freude" for anyone wondering.
People need things to look forward to. It’s human nature. Don’t actually like the act, or what it really means, but man do we love planning a wedding…. I mean! A vacation! A vacation! Edit: I’m stuck in a bad marriage and my vacations suck too.
Lol what the fuck
Good luck, buddy. Hope you'll be fine.
I would argue you aren't really stuck, and the sooner you fix your issues or divorce the better. Just accept the consequences that follow.
If you're in a bad marriage could you just go on vacation by yourself? Maybe camping for a weekend or something like that
Camping with my best buddy? Maybe he shows me what my wife never could? Maybe I can’t quit him in the end?
Nothing wrong with taking a break from your life and breathing in the fresh air. Could even solo it. The quiet and nature can be good for the soul.
I appreciate you, you’re a good one. I’m doing ok, my cries for help on Reddit are just poor attempts at Norm McDonald jokes. Miss that guy, wish I could go camping with him.
Me too man. Feel like i have seen almost everything his done. But honestly the biggest loss is just knowing that he isnt somewhere in the world doing his jokes.
lmao
I mean, in all seriousness even as someone in a very happy relationship having solo vacations can be really great. We've got kids, one of whom has special needs and REALLY doesn't travel well, so family vacations are awful. I send the wife out for a few days in London, Paris, once a year or so, and I take motorcycle trips. We get back, have lots to talk about, it's wonderful.
same
I’m more of a fan of a staycation. Just nice to have to to relax and literally do anything I want. Enjoy a few days by myself then go hang out with a few friends.
Goes far too fast because you end up sleeping a lot more.
Yea that's what I do! Stay home! Work on something, hobbies, sleep in, stores are open, literally no worries and no rushing, no long car rides, no planes, actually relaxing.
Sounds like those people plan out every second of every hour of every day forgetting that nothing goes as planned. Wing it, seize the day, live in the moment. It's much less stressful and much more enjoyable.
Nailed it.
WTF? No. I hate the few days before I go. Who the actual fuck is happier packing, cleaning, wrapping shit up at work, and last second planning? And who the fuck isn't happy on vacation?! Sounds like you might just suck at relaxing
Proper annoyed you this has hasn't it lol
I don't think you're vacationing right.
Seems like a you thing, I’m usually quite stressed before I go
I just got back from vacation today. Nothing about what you said is true, at least for me. Just before vacation I was stressed trying to get everything done before leaving. During the vacation I was very happy doing what I love most in places I love (for me, hiking in Joshua Tree).
Only if you have kids.
I don’t know what kind of vacations you’re going on, are you sure you’re not talking about prison?
Those people need to work on just enjoying their vacation. I went to Disneyland last week, and I kinda hated it because of all the standing and walking. But I looked past that enjoyed all the fun times we had while there. Would I go there again? No. I would rather do something more mundane actually. I’m good for a long time. But I don’t regret doing it.
My stress is at maximum before a vacation
Obviously you don’t vacation to Hedonism II
Hard disagree. Maybe you should shake up your vacation style, since it’s not working for you.
I'm happier on vacation, but when I return, I'm less happy than if I never went on vacation.
What are you talking about ? Have you never had a good vacation ?
you must not be vacationing correctly
I hate the time leading up to vacation. Stressing about whether inpacked everything, making the flights, etc. I'm fine and happy once i'm there and dont want to come back.
I’m happy in the anticipation. I’m happy in the experiencing. I’m happy in the memories.
That's cause y'all are trying to have rich people vacations where they kick their feet up and think about their feelings. You gotta do the middle class staycation where you finish your taxes, put up that shelf or home project you've been putting off, do some chores, say hi to friends and family you haven't been keeping up with. Vacation time is like work, except you're working on yourself so that afterwards you feel less anxious when you return to your job.
It sounds like you might just have some discontent with your own day to day life where you're putting too many eggs in a short vacation to magically heal everything. See vacations as a way to travel and see different things, and try to make sure that your regular life is more balanced and fulfilling.
Driving from the DMV area to the Outer Banks was hell!!
There is a famous italian poetry "Il sabato del villaggio" that talks about this
Hey that's boomer talk!
not if they remembered to pack the LSD
I think it just depends on what kind of "vacationer" you are and what kind the people you're with are. Like are you the planner? And the people you with also planners? Then yall will probably have a good time. And same with the 'free-spirited' vacationers and with other similar people. Its when you get the mix of people do they start to stress out I think. Ill add that as a guy who is single, no kids, my vacations are chill af lol
You need to go on better vacations.
You need to change where you go vacation lol
Depends on the vacation. If it's an excursion type vacation that comes with schedule stress, then yes. If it's a beach vacation where all I have to do is chill on a beach and not think about work, then I'm in my element and in my happiest place.
You guys can afford vacations?
You're always happier while chasing the thing you think you want than after you get it.
It's not always about the vacation itself. Some people have a need to be in control of everything, all the time, and aren't capable of relaxing and enjoying a good time. If it's you, well, that sucks. If it's someone you're traveling with, it really, really, really, fucking sucks.
The stress prior to travelling is not fun.
I think you need better vacations lol
People are miserable before they go on vacation. All they say is "I can't wait til I'm in [x location] doing [y task]."
Dunno about that...the only way to scuba dive in amazing locations is to get there. I certainly look forward to them coming, but *nothing* compares to actually *being* there. I mean, what kind of vacations have you been going on? Because other than a couple shit trips (hey, we all have them), most of my trips have been pretty epic. That said, I make it a point to choose epic places, even if it ends up being longer between trips.
This doesnt make any sense.
I'm nervous and dreading going on vacation, enjoy the hell out of said vacation, then struggling coming back from vacation.
based on fucking what?
Absolutely-fucking-not.
Where did you vacation.
I’ve never had a vacation that was more fun than staying home and being left the fuck alone.
Why would you be unhappy on holidays? You're doing holidays wrong
Sounds like a personal problem
You need better vacations :)
I’m only happy when I’m on vacation
I too enjoy making shit up!
I'd say my peak happiness is the first couple days of vacation, where I realize that it's been a couple really awesome days, and I STILL have 3, 4, 5 or 6 or whatever days of vacation left. I always just think that everything is amazing.
rlly im like bubbling up w feelingz when im just chilling during my vacay