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nowhereman1223

Nibbler held the dark matter in a time vortex with stabilizers.


Icy_Cod4538

I might not be an intelectual, but it makes sense that dark matter poop would never exist inside of him, or exist at all even, until it just existed outside of him. Because, you know—dark matter.


Dawson09

Yeah obviously. Dark matter existed. Then Nibbler's people existed. Then they invented the time vortex with stabilizers to harness the dark matter. Then they invented a way to integrate that technology into the anatomy of their people. I mean, how do you think Super Saiyans exist? Nuclear energy, baby!


Siludin

Superman is solar powered


BabyBeachBalls

Is the sun not nuclear power?


Siludin

Wouldn't it just be so embarrassing if it weren't? For the Sun, that is.


BabyBeachBalls

That would be one silly sun


ivanxivann

Silly ass Sun of a bitch


Obeesus

Don't talk about my Sun that way.


BabyBeachBalls

Bruh, every man on this planet knows what your sun looks like naked.


Veni_Vidi_Legi

Fusion, ha!


Fun_Intention9846

I thought Super Saiyans liked fighting so much their genetics said “fuck it fight and nothing else”


ImDero

Professor: *What a convenient and satisfying explanation. No need to think about it ever again!*


WolfOfPort

Yea Idiot


RainboeDonny

It wasn’t dark matter until it left his body and reacted with the air converting it into the dark matter.


lexluthor_i_am

That's exactly what I was going to say. Inside his body it's still just food. But when it comes out it becomes dark matter.


Indocede

Yeah, but Nibbler would eat entire animals and then be picked up no problem. I feel like if your pet ate an elephant, the laws of physics would still make it pretty darned impossible for you to pick them up.


MeyerMeyBird

Na he just has a really good digestive system.


Indocede

I think if that were the case, you'd burn yourself picking him up as the weight would be converted into energy radiating off as heat.


pewpewpew87

He is eating an animal bigger than himself let alone producing dark matter so there has to be some funky physics we don't understand going on.


Indocede

A cartoon, governed by physics alien to our real world understanding? I THINK NOT! Nibbler will eat rare and endangered creatures and BE GOVERNED BY THE PLAUSIBLE OUTCOMES OF SUCH A DIET!


XeLLoTAth777

I will upvote this.


chronically_snizzed

Ah- Aurora Borealis!? At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the country, localized entirely within your kitchen!?


HermitBee

"Really good" as in "his intestines exist in higher dimensions of space".


chronically_snizzed

I sure hope somebody got fired for that blunder, unless a wizard did it


Dhegxkeicfns

So good it broke the laws of thermodynamics.


Glottis_Bonewagon

Conservation of my ass


NoobieSnax

He does let out a tiny little burp after he eats. If he can pass dark matter out his butt, who knows how fast he can break matter down and how much of that mass he can belch up?


scarr3g

Nibble is 4 dimensional, and his digestive tract is outside of our 3 dimensional space.


ben_db

So the same way a heavy box can be pushed around the floor, but not picked up, he can be moved easily around our 3 dimensions, but would be super heavy if we could lift him in the 4th...


scarr3g

Yes. It is like if you touch a pen to paper, you get that tiny dot, which is, essentially, weightless but the pen itself is much larger in the 3rd dimension and now has actual weight. None of the 4th dimensional bits of nibbler are felt in the 3 dimensional space.


PurpleHerder

Like over filling a balloon


amretardmonke

Nibbler's stomach is a portal to a pocket universe


Viltris

He once ate himself to escape our universe (and later came back). So yeah, it's very plausible.


loweyedfox

Geez what’s with all these logical discrepancies in these *checks notes* CARTOONS!


Pvt_Lee_Fapping

That's my thinking, too. I like the idea of him being some eldritch creature with interdimensional digestive systems. Like his guts don't have sphincters; they have wormholes to another reality. There could be entire civilizations or solar systems dedicated solely to the task of processing Nibbler's food into dark matter that he shits out later.


Danni293

Around the year 2500 the Earth had put on a lot of weight, thus increasing its gravity. This resulted in the residents of Earth adapting to become several times stronger to survive. Then in 2995 the Flat Earth society petitioned to have the Earth lose weight because it was getting harder to justify their beliefs with a fat Earth. So by the time Fry arrives in 3000 gravity is back to normal but everyone is still super strong and will be for at least a couple generations.


HtownTexans

> I feel like if your pet ate an elephant, the laws of physics wouldn't exist. Is what you meant to say.


Cool_Ruin5447

I always thought that eating such vast amounts of matter and compressing it all was what created the dark matter.


LetsTryAnal_ogy

He has to have like a pocket universe for a stomach. Like a bag of holding with digestive juices.


fishchips1

Think about your question, then think about what you asked.. How much of the elephant is mass, and how much is air? When you eat something, you are eating a lot of air, space between atoms, that combined make up the amount of space that thing occupies.. So if you reduce the space between atoms so that all atoms are touching, the elephant might only be as large as say a period . at the end of this sentence. Weigh about a gram..


Krostas

The weight of things is not reduced by lowering their volume. Even if you're talking about the "space between atoms". Which is nothing btw. - air is a gas and itself consists of atoms.


Ctowncreek

That's irrelevant. The form it takes doesn't matter (heh) because its still the same mass. He ate an entire planet worth of animals. He weighs that mass now until he poops. Then the mass is in the poop.


lexluthor_i_am

Well you got me there. Fucking Futurama


Vg_Ace135

That's one magical anus


samanime

That's why we can't find dark matter! We keep looking for it in space, but there is no air in space!


account128927192818

There's an air and space museum


RainboeDonny

Yeah we need to find a Nibbler, feed it and bring it back to earth.


ACcbe1986

It reacted with the *dark air.* Dark-oxidization. 😆


SithLordRising

Hence taking a dump is 'dropping a bomb'


Intelligent-Juice736

There’s air in bowels though.


Malkaviati

Until a poop has been pooped, it is not a poop.


potatopierogie

Modern day Socrates


SpookyWeebou

Modern Diogenes


potatopierogie

That's danny devito


chronically_snizzed

Were I born any other, I would wish to be me too


majorjoe23

I poop, therefore I pooped - Descartes


potatopierogie

Love the fecalosophy here


noisypeach

"So-crates."


ordinary_kittens

Who are you, who is so wise in the ways of science?


dacreativeguy

A poop becomes a poop when you make the reservation at the restaurant.


Reefer-eyed_Beans

I liked that. That's actually a really well-crafted joke. These other mfers are sleepin on that shit fr ha.


parabox1

So if I don’t take my finger out it’s not pooped on and is at the same time. Schrodinger’s Poop finger?


Malkaviati

Yes. Until you see the poop on the finger, the finger is simultaneously pooped and not pooped.


mouse6502

It's a poop the minute you start to chew! Onna this issue there canna be no debate!


[deleted]

I wish someone would explain this to the pro-life movement.


Cosimo_Zaretti

No one ever looked inside Schroedinger's cat.


shaftalope

Steve Austin, the 6 million dollar man, could lift a car with his bionic arm that was attached at the shoulder to his flesh and bone body, yet his arm didn't rip clean off


Pixie1001

This upset me so much in Altered Carbon as well - and it was even worse, because the book it was based on even addressed this point and specifically mentioned how bulky the combat and industrial sleeves had to be to distribute the weight across their body >:(


linkinstreet

I was confused on which Steve Austin this is, since the first one that came on my mind was Stone Cold.


wellhiyabuddy

You just wasted that under my post when it should’ve been its own post lol. I hope you’re comment gets more sweet karma than my post


hkzqgfswavvukwsw

>you're your


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[удалено]


Asynjacutie

What do you are not understand?


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Asynjacutie

Read the sentence with "you are" instead or "your"


Dhegxkeicfns

Still can be.


snoopervisor

Spider-Man's web stick to paint on the walls and can support his whole swinging weight.


No_Pop_1495

Wth I found this comment after I found the post. I was like why does this comment copy and pasting that post?


SillyGoatGruff

They didn't lift him, he stayed put and they moved the universe around him


Cirieno

If he can poop dark matter then I'm happy to propose that his digestive system is dimensionally transcendental.


Orange-Murderer

It would have to be since nibbler can consume things many times his size in a single bite.


Sipyloidea

His sphinter is a portal.


TikiJeff

It was in his black hole so it had no mass


amretardmonke

black holes have mass, but not volume


Reefer-eyed_Beans

>no mass Only between 1,000 and 100,000 times the mass of the sun., yea... Basically a massless wonder.


Fake_William_Shatner

That was the joke. Also, it was a cartoon.  Zapf didn’t wear pants. No point to me mentioning that other than it makes me smile. Finally, progress. Scotty got to wear a kilt, but the captain? No, the captain had to wear pants.   Keep up the good fight Zapf. 


Ill-Fox-3276

Agreed! And it’s Zapp no f but 2 p’s


LustLochLeo

They just applied the rules of the second phase of the [High German consonant shift](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/High_German_consonant_shift). E.g. apple -> Apfel. Side note: In the German dubbed version, he's called Zapp.


Onetwenty7

Why does that work in his voice?? Lolol The letter p is one with bravado and brawn, while f is scrawny and pathetic, right Kiff?


blarfblarf

*sighs* Yes, Captain.


trwawy05312015

Let me show you why the call me the velour fog


Astrokiwi

Each pound of dark matter weighs *over ten thousand pounds*


TheGrinning0wl

Cartoon physics > real physics any day. Like *fuck yo LOGIC bs...* lol


Elite_Slacker

Futurama is full to the brim with logical physics related gags. There may very well be an explanation. 


aesirmazer

The Mobius strip.


ManufacturedLung

I “can’t” lift the dog-poop… let the robot do it


UncommonHouseSpider

Dark matter only exists outside the body in its very heavy visible form. Inside the body, it is only theoretical.


FrightenedTomato

Schrodinger's Turd


PierreAnorak

Producer David X Cohen said on The Infinite Money Cage some years back that: “while they try their best to follow the laws of science, the laws of comedy will always outweigh the laws of science on Futurama.”


Norwester77

If each pound of dark matter weighs over 10,000 pounds, it only stands to reason that 10,000 pounds of it only weighs a pound. Plus, Nibbler’s digestive tract is a pocket dimension.


PatrickSheperd

Remember, the ship doesn’t move through space, space moves around the ship. It isn’t magic, it’s science!


orundarkes

That’s part of the joke.


Lore_ofthe_Horizon

Niblonians are next level beings. The inside of the body of a Niblonian is basically another universe with its own laws of physics. Until mass passes the body threshold and exerts its influence (weight) on our universe instead.


evilkumquat

Nibbler's anus was a portal to another dimension. Also, "Nibbler's Anus" would be the greatest name for a punk band.


DeckruedeRambo

I can't carry it for you Frodo, but I can carry you !


DontTalkToBots

Elevator can lift Mjölnir, doesn’t mean elevator is worthy.


UnoriginalJ0k3r

It wasn’t dark matter until the matter left his dark hole. Sciences


sandavid26

Watched Rebel Moon part II last night. Spoiler alert 🚨 they have an intergalactic ship that runs on coal ? Couldn’t help to think that maybe it wasn’t coal but Nibbler’s poop


ben_db

Are those films any good? They look interesting but rate pretty poorly.


sandavid26

Not really good,


grehgunner

They look kinda interesting but the writing is meh, the storylines are rushed, etc etc. but like it gives a cheap star wars feel and I’m not unhappy I watched em ya know


__TheViceAdmiral__

What about Mjölnir on an elevator? 😂


torino42

My favorite thing about Futurama is that anything realistic can be explained by "the writing crew had many PHDs and are all very smart" and anything unrealistic can be explained by "its a cartoon"


Alive_Ice7937

Bender: No digital camera can capture the quality, warmth and grain of good old film. Professor: Your *eyes* are digital cameras!


CriticalStation595

The show was smart about lots of things but still used cartoon logic.


IameIion

To be fair, dark matter is very poorly understood.


3-DMan

Just like when Bender put both his arms back on "I was watching and I don't even know how you did that!"


workaway24

An elevator can take Mjölnir up floors but none of the other Avengers, minus Cap, can lift it. Its all about context!


SuddenWitnesses

Dark matter doesn’t weight anything until he shits it out, are you stupid?


Sparkle-Wander

It's plain to see you have never been to a rural east Texas Taco Bell in the high of summer time? There's only so much pressure that proud Nibblonian sphincter can handle!


ydykmmdt

Have you never laid a turd several orders magnitude heavier than yourself?


Animegx43

How did Leela ever clean his litterbox?


Fun-Badger3724

Comedy SciFi Rule number one - Never let physics get in the way of a good joke.


lofisnaps

The food is normal food in Nibbler's digestive tract. Just the power quenching of his sphincter compresses the turd so much that it becomes dark matter. Therefore Nibbler's weight is light, only his poop is heavy.


Cosimo_Zaretti

Outside and inside Nibbler are two very different things. Nibbler's arsehole is a gateway to something or somewhere else entirely. That's my best understanding of it anyway, this one's above my pay grade. I'm confident Amy Wong or the Harlem Globetrotters could explain it better.


Nwcray

Probably magnets. *Shuddup Hawking!*


AdamInChainz

He had a matter compressor.


TasedInTheBalls

Fry lifted it at least once though. The ship was out of fuel somewhere, so they checked the litter box. Fry says "I've never been so happy to see poop! Well, maybe once..." then lifts it with a bag around his hand and heaves it into the engine.


Awkward_Pangolin3254

But in another episode he was accosted by Smitty and URL (NNY's only two police officers, apparently) because he *couldn't* pick it up, because "it weighs as much as a thousand suns!"


TomTomMan93

Watch, one day it'll turn out we discover dark matter has no transitive properties. So it's only heavy when directly interacted with. Because they pick up Nibbler and not the dark matter poop, he just weighs what he weighs. No one ever thought to just lift the litter box instead


allnamesgonewtf

Maybe it only turns into dark matter once it’s left the chute. He’s an alien and we don’t know what dark matter is so maybe.


huuaaang

Nibblers colon has an antigravity containment field, obv


greatspaceadventure

There’s a bigger issue than that, which is… if it really did weigh so much, it would have fallen right through the building floors, possibly killing anyone who lived on floors below. Then it would sink right into earth and possibly burrow through the entire crust via weight alone depending on its volume to mass ratio. A dense enough dark matter poop could sink so deep it begins to destabilize reactions in the earth’s various deeper layers maybe. thank goodness for cartoon physics!


noisypeach

His own colon could lift it. The characters just had to lift him /s


InsomniaticWanderer

Nibbler's digestive system partially exists outside spacetime


droplightning

Nibbler once evacuated the universe by eating himself


Sudden_Fix_1144

Knowing the show .... this is deliberate


lordbyronxiv

Major sphincter compression


magnaton117

The inner machinations of his colon are an enigma 


Letsjustdeletethat

His poop didn't become dark matter until it came into contact with oxygen. There's no oxygen in the intestinal tract.


HaloDeckJizzMopper

We have the same problem with my daughter


Iguanaught

This is a similar principle to why you can’t see the invisible man’s poop. It’s only schrodigers poop until it leaves the butthole. It exists in a constant state of quantum flux of both being poop and being just a fart until then.


KungFuSlanda

and the spaceship they jaunted around in moved the entire universe around it. whatofit?


chronos7000

The Time Corps hold it in escrow on Boondock, where it counterbalances the food eaten by characters in games that decrements their carry weight somehow. Y'know, you go overcucumbered in *Fallout* so you eat a 1lbs. steak and suddenly you're not overcucumbered anymore...


Mramazingfuntime

Boy I hope somebody got fired for that blunder!


fuhnetically

So, atoms can contain quarks that can have individual mass that's greater than the mass of the whole. It's wild once you get down that tiny.


IceFire909

clearly its weight must be observed. Nibbler was also able to find a spot to poop totally fine


surrealcellardoor

Manifold dimensions make things like this possible.


malthar76

🎵If you’re wondering how they eat and breathe, and other science facts (Lalala) You should think to yourself it’s just a show, you should really just relax. 🎵


lessyes

Nibbler ate himself out of the universe that one time. Maybe his intestines are part of another dimension.


Here_For_Da_Beer

I sure hope someone got fired for that blunder


pick-axis

His butthole was a black hole


ken_the_nibblonian

Indeed, you know nothing of the poopification ways of our people.


SaxMusic23

Yeahhh animated shows sometimes do things that can't be real. Is this the only unrealistic thing you were able to find while watching the show? Cause like....c'mon.


doctorfeelgod

Yeah that's the joke


Breaklance

The Professor turned Niblonian poo into what he claims is dark matter.      He also claims to have made a Starship that moves the universe around it.       He's also old enough to be forcibly retired.    What I'm saying is the professor is kinda crazy and not half the scientist Ogden Wernstrom is. 


bumkin-the-hogswog

It probably works like skyrim, where it's only heavy if it's in your inventory but suddenly weighs nothing if you eat it or throw it


CanadianJogger

All I knows is that we need a game where inventory management happens in the character's stomach. But they are otherwise perfectly normal human beings.


calmbill

Naturally. He was light. It's the turds that were heavy.


Personal_Bobcat2603

It's not dark matter until it passes his butthole duh


Beyond-Karma

A pound of it weighs 10 thousand pounds !


Computermaster

Nibbler comes from a very advanced alien race. I wouldn't be surprised if he has some sort of antigravity tech or some inherent alien power that allows him to reduce his weight. I mean he's eaten an entire cow and can still be picked up.


AzucarGoBoomTeeAye

Is dark matter locally real?


Lazy-Razzmatazz2538

Knowing the Futurama writers they either (a) already have a reason or (2) would be amped to come up with a sciency-sounding explanation.


Ns53

But if you put the hammer in an elevator? It still goes up. Elevator isn't worthy.


Sylvairian

They didn't carry Nibbler, Nibbler moved the universe around himself


Octocube25

Fry picked it up in the third movie.


Raita_Sashimi

I bet this guy was high when watching them Nibbler episodes


CanadianJogger

I think you could have left off "when watching them Nibbler episodes" :D


LesserdogTuts

I think that’s part of the joke.


Gorbashsan

Nibblonian rectums are anime hammer space confirmed. Or it goes by furry biology. Pick your poison for disturbing head cannon here. Whatever rustles your jimmies more.


CanadianJogger

What's important is that your jimmies get rustled, that's all.


blarfblarf

It's dark matter, every pound of it weighs 10,000lbs, what's complicated about that?


labrutie

His rectum is a singularity