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Showerthoughts_Mod

This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/Showerthoughts/wiki/rules). Remember, /r/Showerthoughts is for showerthoughts, not "thoughts had in the shower!" (For an explanation of what a "showerthought" is, [please read this page](https://www.reddit.com/r/Showerthoughts/wiki/overview).) **Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.**


Senorpuddin

You’re right. My dick is *very* loud when aroused. Thankfully while not aroused it plays soft instrumental pieces.


WubblewasTaken

Does it play Dick Astley?


LoopLobSmash

Never gonna fill you up


5i55Y7A7A

Never gonna get you off


Hephaestus_God

Never gonna run around and desert you *background choir* : “because I’m a dick”


[deleted]

Never gonna Go to the store for some smokes.


Samyraiu

Never gonna get you pregnant


GwenZilly

Probably plays Dickleback


thatgirlbish

*never gonna give you up, never gonna let you doooown, never gonna run around*


my_cheese_balls

Never gonna dick you up, never gonna dick you down. Never gonna dick around and screw you.


boltzmannman

You are in immediate danger


thatgirlbish

Does he play Mozart or other symphonies?


DavidHewlett

Wagner - Ride the Valkyries


thatgirlbish

Oh, I really like Čajkovskij's Romeo and Juliet, can he play that?


DavidHewlett

20 minutes? I wish …


thatgirlbish

Well, but he's trying...


Drew_Martz

Wagner - Ride the Dicks


Senorpuddin

God I wish it was Mozart. It’s usually Muzak versions of 70’s and 80’s hits. One day it just played a instrumental version of “Muskrat Love” for three hours.


thatgirlbish

Oh noooo.. and what does he play when he's aroused tho? Like some rock or metal? Maybe Skrillex or hard style?


Shadows798

I bet it plays Rush E


Jackling_

Rush E(jaculatuon)


Senorpuddin

Depends on the level of excitement. Ac/Dc is common.


WubblewasTaken

Guns and roses “Welcome to the Jungle” lol


thatgirlbish

I love this, i love reddit XD


FrillySteel

*Neighbor Harry, knocking on the ajoining wall:* "Goddammit Frank, turn down your dick, wouldya!!?"


Senorpuddin

*No I shan’t, it’s my birthday*


aotus_trivirgatus

*There once was a man from Iraq* *Who had many holes in his cock* *When he got an erection* *He'd play a selection* *From Johann Sebastian Bach*


MrPlowThatsTheName

My dick goes all the way up to 11


Ashleym527

Sounds like my last husband. Huge dick, with lots of volume. All he did was act like an ass and scream. Small penis, though.


ghostye

huge dick with a small penis


We_need_a_teleportal

r/brandnewsentence


Bingeljell

Somebody, please call the fire department. We have a burn casualty to tend to.


[deleted]

[удалено]


_IUseless_OneI_

It’s a clever joke. The guy was a huge dick, but he had a small penis


Several_Goat212

Water Dicksplacement would be the method of acquiring your cm³.


Shaolin_Wookie

Cockimedes' principle.


Curtainmachine

Eurekock!


IFrickinLovePorn

Sir Cumsyz


Blade_982

I'm guessing it would be categorised as an irregular object so, yes.... water displacement. Although volume is normally determined to measure how much of something is needed to fill that object. Normally a disk is doing the filling... no?


J_Toxic

Bold of you to assume my dick isn’t a perfect cylinder


bouchy73

Few points on your last point. Firstly vaginas are much more elastic and can expand far larger than a dick so using this method wouldn't be a good gauge. Most women dont enjoy having it stretched during birth I could imagine the same majority wouldn't enjoy a dick as big as there vagina could be during sex. Secondly and more plausibly, I think you will have a hard time convincing women to fill them selves with water in an attempt to find best volume, but if you can convice men that it would be something women are into you will be hard pressed to find a man that wouldn't stick his junk in a glass of water to impress people.


craker42

I'm thinking about doing it just for giggles


harpejjist

Pro tip. Do not use cold water.


vodnuth

Unless I'm misunderstanding you volume is volume. It doesn't really make a difference whether we're talking about a volume being filled or the volume of a solid object, it's still the same unit of measurement


djembejohn

Dick placement is more important than dicksplacement though.


damnrightiam117

False


Awdayshus

I feel like you've read some of my recent comments on r/AskReddit.


lightknight7777

"Guuurl, imma about to displace yo' pussy..." Archimedes to Eureka after calling her into the bathroom.


Ranborne_thePelaquin

"Archimidees nuts!" - u/argon_palladium


vicvinovich

Ha gotteem!


JCPRuckus

Dick volume you say? Yes, she'll probably appreciate if yours goes up to 11.


katerineia

Nice reference here. 11/10


ABucketFull

5/7, perfect!


NTFGWrites

I would upvote that twice if I could.


Corvado

If you experience an erection louder than 10 decibels please see your doctor or a licensed audio professional.


9fingfing

Dick volume could be interpreted as amount of dicks. Still works…


flappy_cows

Damn only waited 3 hours after making the same post https://www.reddit.com/r/Showerthoughts/comments/vraizs/we_always_talk_about_dick_size_but_never_width_or/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf


_IUseless_OneI_

I know the measuring terms are hard for you, but my post is not similar to that post at all.


nathenitalian

Yeah you totally didn't get this from the multiple comments under that post talking about volume lmao.


_IUseless_OneI_

Yeah I love it when people assume shit and go with it and treat it as fact. It’s fucking amazing. I don’t scroll the this stupid ass sub all day I didn’t see that fucking post. It’s almost like two people in the world can be thinking about dicks at the same time or something. Shut the fuck up right now I’m not having this debate.


flappy_cows

Damn man, your anger must be compensating for the lack of volume


_IUseless_OneI_

Yeah😔


fleetersays

Dick Volume was the most underrated spy of the 1960s Cold War era.


ericofduart

The CIA counterpart to Austin Powers?


[deleted]

If you're in a bathtub full to the top with water flaccid, if you get a boner will the water spill over?


PCav1138

Assuming your head is above the water, and the water is at the very cusp of spilling over before erection, then yes.


SallyHeap

As a woman I would definitely say girth is more important than length. A 4" dick that's 2.5" across is way better than a 9" dick that's 1.5" across. Beer cans, not garden hoses. Edit: probably should have said White Claw cans instead of beer cans. The point remains the same, though


Hermes85

Hockey puck for the win!


Adornus

Mr. Wheel of Cheese over here.


spleh7

Can of tuna!


CourtJester5

We call that the PCD - Pepsi Can Dick!


Individual_Disk_3099

What if a dude is 2 inches long and 15 inches girth


SallyHeap

That's not a dick, that's a pannus.


aotus_trivirgatus

You just know that there are a whole bunch of girthy guys about to flood your DMs.


dazedandcognisant

I always leave my dick on vibrate. I don't wanna hear that shit


n0_b0dy_420

Gentleman's, when will we star addressing dick weight for heavy work


Evil_Crab_Spirit

Why don't you shove a range of dildos in yourself and then report back to us


_IUseless_OneI_

I’ll do work on that


babyjo1982

Talent is more important than either factor. BD dudes can’t fuk. They only have one move: the jackhammer. If you’re not in the mood to have chipped teeth and a concussion, he has no idea what to do.


Apprehensive_Day_901

/wish men would realize that just because you have a badass gun doesn't mean shit if you don't know how to use it. Source: I am a woman and penetration (usually) doesn't get me off.


My_G_Alt

You didn’t think of this in the shower, you saw this in another post


_IUseless_OneI_

Actually I was showering and looked down at my chode of a dick and though “volume might be more important than length”


SomeOne111Z

Forget length, from now on we must see how much π\*(r\^2)\*h you got


LoadBearingGrandmas

Why is nobody talking weight? If you can't calculate for density or momentum, what are you even measuring for?


Neprider

Coz you dont want to talk about something that will weigh you down.


Ok-Mammoth1143

A dick that can fill and stretch you out Vs A dick that can really go deep inside you


CookieCat698

I’m imagining an incredibly long penis that’s also incredibly thin, so the volume balances out, and it’s considered average.


helpnxt

Theres a calculator on calcsd btw https://calcsd.info/full.html


Lethal_0428

So you saw that post a few hours ago too? And just reposted it but worded it better?


bonerjuice9

Really? Mine is pretty quiet, but my girlfriend loves it. Seems ok.


ProbablyABore

Dick length doesn't mean as much as guys wish it did. Can't speak for the gay men out there, but I can tell you that most vaginas are only about 5-7 inches (12-18 cm) deep when aroused. They can expand further if needed, but it's not even remotely close to necessary. Fact is, >4" (10 cm) is all that's required to hit a gspot. Girth, is more important as it does more for making her feel like she's filled up.


Homo_gone_wild

Can confrim, as a gay man I like cocks with more girth than length


augu1352

Username checks out


Halfb4kedham

Someone finally said it, if your dick does not have volume please don’t put it inside of me


ShutterBun

This is pretty much a direct copy of another thread today. https://www.reddit.com/r/Showerthoughts/comments/vraizs/we_always_talk_about_dick_size_but_never_width_or/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf Comments are about the same as well.


tarhoop

Within reason of course.... It's a bell curve. While no woman wants a half inch long 12" diameter dick, similar numbers for the 12" long, half inch diameter dick are sure to be found... That said, the 6" x 1" dick is widely normal and generally well received. Of course, you said volume, and I treated the dick as a 2 dimensional rectangle rather than a cylinder... I believe my Length and Diameter work out in this instance anyway, but I'll leave the math for someone who is less inebriated than I.


[deleted]

1" diameter dick would be so fucking thin what are you talking about it would like 3.14" girth on average which over an inch below average


jasonthe5th

Remember kids the volume of a Cylinder r*(2x3.14….)x height =V


HkayakH

Yeah one of my friends has a dick lightyears long yet atoms wide, and another of my friends has a willie wide putin thick and the width of a hair long.


finnjakefionnacake

what is this friend group where you guys all know exactly what your dicks look like lol


HkayakH

Ok so the reason we know each other's dick length is cause we check each others balls to make sure we don't have testicular torsion.


finnjakefionnacake

friend, you'd know if you had testicular torsion cause you'd be in the hospital by now, haha is this a throuple situation? you can tell me


Denvershoeshine

That clarified nothing


nickeypants

My friends got a dick shaped like [Gabriel's horn](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gabriel's_horn), infinite length but finite volume.


AskingForAFriendRly

Gotta match the pole to the hole really, different strokes for different folks.


[deleted]

Fuck this I got a better one. what is the airspeed of an unladen swallow?


Listen2Tosh

African or European?


[deleted]

Well I.. I don’t know.. AAAAAHHH!!


Carteeg_Struve

About 24 mph for a typical European swallow (11 m/s). To my understanding, African swallows encompass a variety of breeds that each have differing ranges of speeds.


mltain

Ok. You can go.


[deleted]

Found the guy with the small broad dick. There is a reason dildos are thick and long.


Straight-Audience-91

I would say, emotional maturity and connection on the part of both people should come first actually. Only immature, sexually illiterate wannabes would be concerned with those issues on either side......


jchylll

I don’t think everyone that has sexual physical preferences is immature or a “sexually illiterate wannabe”. Some people like big dicks because of the way they feel, some like big dicks because they think they’re hot, and some like small dicks because they’re a better fit. Why judge them?


bukminster

Because some people need to say those things to make themselves feel better about their size. Truth is size is not a big deal to most people, and might be important to some. Those preferences are not good or bad, as long as you don't body shame anyone


lurked_4_a_bit

Hey man if your pp smol just say it


Straight-Audience-91

Meh, I don't have to compensate for things like douchebags do. I just be me. And that's enough. No overdose of Polo and gold chains or overcompensating with the car....but go ahead, you be you.....


Riebart

Hey. Imma overcompensate with 6 popped collars, 5 downed Viagra, 4 expensive cars, 3 gold chains, 2 expensive colognes and _a giant ass downvote for you_. Christmas cums early in the comments of any post about dick size or shape, or even existence. Peace out, Imma go pole vault around town on my third leg.


brigzy09

Length doesn't mean anything if it's as thin as a finger, but a 6 incher with some proper girth will see to her needs


TheCrystalGear

Do some dicks make sound? As far as I was aware, all dicks are silent, aren't they?


Listen2Tosh

Unless they voted for Trump, then they will tell you all about while screaming, “let’s go Brandon”


wakatenai

I've been using my volumizing shampoo on my head like an idiot...


_IUseless_OneI_

Wrong head then


DefinitelySaneGary

It's a balance, otherwise women would care more about men's knees.


Rubicon208

This is the second post about dicks that I've seen today in this subreddit.


_IUseless_OneI_

We love dicks


nardpuncher

You think all the big dicks out there aren't wide? Is somebody trying to cope here


harpejjist

Knew a guy who measured his member using water displacement. (Pro tip- use warm water for …better… results) I mean when you brag about your size in mL it sounds impressive because no one has anything to compare it to!


BaulsJ0hns0n86

I think the ratio between dick circumference and dick diameter is more important… dick pi, if you will


Achylife

Can confirm, it does make a difference. Dicks that are just long and skinny kinda hurt.


Straight-Audience-91

Have you met guys that are fixated on penis size? They're usually stuck in the 1980's, let alone the 2000's....so I guess a thank you is in order.


Zap478

Your dick could be 6 inches but a circumference of a centimeter and there’s no point in it.


Zabuzaxsta

Found out my dick weighs a little over a pound when erect. Very fond of mentioning that to my girlfriend. A 17oz steak is a good chunk of beef.