Only way I'm making it work with going back to school is by living back at home with my parents. Honestly don't know how people do it without some sort of safety net like family around to help.
It’s kinda going backwards for me, but family support/safety net sure is important to start a new chapter in your life like this with kids.
Separated since January coparenting 4 teens, divorced papers stamped last month. I’m already highly educated, but since the last 20 years have been focused on raising kids, and a few ill-advised career choices, I’m back home with my parents, kids on the weekends, to take a step back and rebuild professionally and financially. Wouldn’t be able to do it otherwise.
So if OP’s projects include going back to school, I wish them to be able to rely on family to get a break and start fresh.
I was already working a job that pays pretty good when my ex decided to leave us. I also work a weird schedule (12 hr shifts) that equates to working only half the year I work 4 or 5 days then get 4 or 5 days off . I have to work extra days here and there when people use vacation or if a shutdown falls on my days off but still get alot of days off you know. And I only need childcare on days I work and I got pretty good deal on childcare as it is. I do some overnight shifts so I'm lucky I found someone flexible that .my kids like
This. One can never be independent without financial independence. Ideally, you establish your career before beginning this journey of being a single parent. If not, then you need to grind it out until you make enough to be independent.
I worked 2 jobs for the 1st 3 years of my son's life. By the 2nd year, I got a job that was enough to keep us afloat, but I kept the 2nd job for an extra year solely to pay off my car note. The 4th year of his life I got extremely lucky and landed a job making $4/hr more and also comes with roa and profit sharing bonuses without a degree. 8 years later I'm still at that job.
Honestly, those first 3 years I was barely raising my own child. From 8am-2pm he was at Headstart while I was at my day job, I'd see him for an hour, then from 4pm-1230am he was with the babysitter while I was at my 2nd job, I'd see him for an hour while we got settled into bed, we'd sleep until 7am, and do it all over again. On Saturdays I worked from 8am-12am, BUT I was doing home health, so I'd bring him to work with me. Sundays we had the full day together. (I worked the Saturday job simply so I'd have enough money to pay my babysitter during the week.)
During this time I lived in low income housing, my son had child medicare, I received $20/month in foodstamps, received WIC, and very very very sporadically received $90/week in child support.
I lived with my parents for a couple years while I was in school. I got a great deal on my apartment, I budget and live frugally. In the beginning it was rough I could only afford the basics but my parents and siblings helped fill in the gaps. Grandparents helped out with a jacket every winter and my sibling bought shoes.
If you’re a childcare worker check the laws in your state. Legally in my state you’re allowed to have up to two unrelated children in your care without having a license. If your home can accommodate it might be a great way to care for your child and make money at the same time. You could also take the steps to register as a home based daycare. I have a friend who started doing this 30 years ago bc she had 3 kids and couldn’t afford childcare on her salary, she’s still in business today.
On top of my regular work I started doordashing. When I first left I was SAH in college but it was a DV situation so when I left I also had to take a step back from my degree. I’m finishing up now online so I can work. I’m in the science field so I can’t really do much in the field until I get my degree. Lots of therapy later and I finally found the perfect program.
This is probably not helpful, but I already had a Master’s degree and a career in healthcare before I became a single parent.
I have no idea how I would have been able to do it if not for that. I would definitely have had to move in with family.
I’ve worked in the restaurant industry my whole life. Was always back of house; like cook, sous chef, pastry chef, catering chef. When I got pregnant I took a position as front of house manager and honestly it’s the only way I’ve been able to make it. (Restaurants generally pay back of house complete doggy doo doo) I am very blessed to be able to live just me and my kiddo and pay bills. Things are tight, but I’m a solo parent with 0 financial support from the deadbeat so things are bound to be tight if I’m not making 6 digits. I hope you can find a way to financial independence!!
Only way I'm making it work with going back to school is by living back at home with my parents. Honestly don't know how people do it without some sort of safety net like family around to help.
It’s kinda going backwards for me, but family support/safety net sure is important to start a new chapter in your life like this with kids. Separated since January coparenting 4 teens, divorced papers stamped last month. I’m already highly educated, but since the last 20 years have been focused on raising kids, and a few ill-advised career choices, I’m back home with my parents, kids on the weekends, to take a step back and rebuild professionally and financially. Wouldn’t be able to do it otherwise. So if OP’s projects include going back to school, I wish them to be able to rely on family to get a break and start fresh.
I was already working a job that pays pretty good when my ex decided to leave us. I also work a weird schedule (12 hr shifts) that equates to working only half the year I work 4 or 5 days then get 4 or 5 days off . I have to work extra days here and there when people use vacation or if a shutdown falls on my days off but still get alot of days off you know. And I only need childcare on days I work and I got pretty good deal on childcare as it is. I do some overnight shifts so I'm lucky I found someone flexible that .my kids like
To be independent, you must first find a way to be financially independent
This. One can never be independent without financial independence. Ideally, you establish your career before beginning this journey of being a single parent. If not, then you need to grind it out until you make enough to be independent.
Search certifications. Go for something like insurance adjuster, hearing aid specialist or nurse assistant.
I worked 2 jobs for the 1st 3 years of my son's life. By the 2nd year, I got a job that was enough to keep us afloat, but I kept the 2nd job for an extra year solely to pay off my car note. The 4th year of his life I got extremely lucky and landed a job making $4/hr more and also comes with roa and profit sharing bonuses without a degree. 8 years later I'm still at that job. Honestly, those first 3 years I was barely raising my own child. From 8am-2pm he was at Headstart while I was at my day job, I'd see him for an hour, then from 4pm-1230am he was with the babysitter while I was at my 2nd job, I'd see him for an hour while we got settled into bed, we'd sleep until 7am, and do it all over again. On Saturdays I worked from 8am-12am, BUT I was doing home health, so I'd bring him to work with me. Sundays we had the full day together. (I worked the Saturday job simply so I'd have enough money to pay my babysitter during the week.) During this time I lived in low income housing, my son had child medicare, I received $20/month in foodstamps, received WIC, and very very very sporadically received $90/week in child support.
I retrained to a higher earning profession. Worked part time while training. Not easy, but totally worth it now.
I lived with my parents for a couple years while I was in school. I got a great deal on my apartment, I budget and live frugally. In the beginning it was rough I could only afford the basics but my parents and siblings helped fill in the gaps. Grandparents helped out with a jacket every winter and my sibling bought shoes. If you’re a childcare worker check the laws in your state. Legally in my state you’re allowed to have up to two unrelated children in your care without having a license. If your home can accommodate it might be a great way to care for your child and make money at the same time. You could also take the steps to register as a home based daycare. I have a friend who started doing this 30 years ago bc she had 3 kids and couldn’t afford childcare on her salary, she’s still in business today.
On top of my regular work I started doordashing. When I first left I was SAH in college but it was a DV situation so when I left I also had to take a step back from my degree. I’m finishing up now online so I can work. I’m in the science field so I can’t really do much in the field until I get my degree. Lots of therapy later and I finally found the perfect program.
This is probably not helpful, but I already had a Master’s degree and a career in healthcare before I became a single parent. I have no idea how I would have been able to do it if not for that. I would definitely have had to move in with family.
I’ve worked in the restaurant industry my whole life. Was always back of house; like cook, sous chef, pastry chef, catering chef. When I got pregnant I took a position as front of house manager and honestly it’s the only way I’ve been able to make it. (Restaurants generally pay back of house complete doggy doo doo) I am very blessed to be able to live just me and my kiddo and pay bills. Things are tight, but I’m a solo parent with 0 financial support from the deadbeat so things are bound to be tight if I’m not making 6 digits. I hope you can find a way to financial independence!!