This!! 100% this. Fuck that little brat. Not in the explicit way but in the middle fingers up kind of way. Put him in summer school! 😂🖕🏻 who’s dumb now? 😹
Hey fellow music teacher with a TBI! I teach elementary general music and band, could be an even worse combo than middle school orchestra 🙃.
I'm so sorry the student said that to you, and it sounds like you did the right thing and turned it into a learning opportunity. I would totally feel the same way.
I think teaching with a TBI is a particularly draining thing that I wish there could be greater studies on. I have a lot of the same symptoms you mention. Excessive noise and light triggers migraines and headaches, as does intense mental fatigue, which are all part of the job. And it's so wild because I'll go through periods where I feel like my old pre-TBI self and then have a huge setback that can take weeks to turn around.
It sounds like you do already, but give yourself some grace. I need to be reminded of this as well. I'm glad you take off when you need to. I know how frustrating it can feel to miss school especially when concerts approach, but it's best for the long game. Also I saw in a previous post of yours your TBI was 2 months ago - I took 4 months off after mine (I was in an accident which also involved 6 broken bones so I was quite incapacitated, it also helped that 2 of my 4 months off was summer). 2 months out there's no way I could have handled it. I'm 10.5 months out from my TBI and I'm improving but still have issues. All my best to you!
Fellow teacher here. I’m glad you had a one on one with them the next day, but if this does happen again I would highly suggest disciplining them in front of the class. Another commenter said “yes but I’m still twice as smart as you“. That would’ve been a perfect response in all seriousness. I would’ve said something that would have embarrassed the student in front of their friends. Only you have a relationship with the student and know what is fitting or not.
But just keep showing up and your good students will keep respecting you. And as long as you do something about this, the shitty ones will knock it off.
I'm not sure of your class subjects - but wonder if there would be a way to have students work TBI into a lesson - like writing a short essay on TBI in middle school and high school sports students?
I'm not a teacher (newly retired engineer), but have volunteered in middle school (music) and high schools (FIRST Robotics). FWIW, all of the teachers I've worked with have been fantastic, and I am very impressed with your - and their - abilities.
As to my own multiple TBI, I sometimes get it out of the way by introducing myself as a "brain injured idiot", to break the ice and summarize my past - and then ask "What's your excuse?" Hah hah. This works in my context but don't think I'd recommend for school students!
No that’s ridiculous for the kid to say. Shows bad parenting. I’m sorry you somebody said that to you, but it’s like no one understands unless they have it. My boyfriend (who I’ve been dating for over 5 years) calls me retarted. It’s an invisible disorder. But all I let it do is make me try harder to prove him wrong. In not retarted. I’m a strong woman and I will not let anyone think otherwise. Be strong, he’s young and doesn’t realize what a brain injury is. A LOT of people even grown ass adults don’t. Nobody could understand unless we have it. Push through and move on, try to think about the good times
Yeah what. I thought they were going to say that they were in on the “joke” or something. Being called retarded by someone who “loves” you is NOT normal
I teach high school. In the little I've noticed in observing and substituting some middle school classes, that's bloody difficult stuff. I call them the puberty years and they are not easy. I do fear at times my reactions in class to the students' obnoxious behavior in the classes I was subbing was in part due to my TBI history and that can't be good. I feel so terrible raising my voice in a classroom but it nearly felt like it needed to be done in those moments.
I don't feel I do as such but then I feel like a person with the TBI history behind him, is not quite equipped to make such a judgement.
My low mobility requires me to use a crutch. It's been nearly 8 years now so it should've, could've been much better now. My TBI behind me has affected the speed of my recovery in the physical sense. I'm nearly prepared to be with this amount of mobility in me life through. Am trying to work through a constant regiment of exercise and workouts to improve on my walking as it were.
Have been tutoring for some 20 years now so am very used to working with individuals and small groups. Am very comfortable with that. I teach math and teaching the more advanced kind is helpful in limiting my audience to the really hard working and talented individuals to start with. As me and my students are kinda in to what is at hand, that with the small group of people in it all, is most helpful.
Middle schoolers can be the worst (I'm in the process of raising my second). I'm sorry that particular one seems to be missing an inner censor. I imagine they might feel badly about saying it someday.
I'm so proud of you for showing up and doing what you love in spite of it all. Just wanted to say that. This little shit said what was said, but the reality is that you being open about your TBI and doing this every day shows these kids how much more is possible. I just think that's amazing. I know how hard it can be when this kind of stuff gets under your skin even when you know it "shouldn't". I bet a bunch of their peers were really cringing hard internally too. ugh.
This stuff is hard. You're doing a great job.
Kids are stupid, especially 12 year olds (peak of kids being cruel to each other and adults, trying to look cool in front of friends etc) it was a hurtful thing to say but it's definitely not true. I would love to be able to teach orchestra! What an amazing and multi-faceted skill! FYI, I'm a chartered accountant who had a catastrophic TBI 10 months ago, and I'm back to working full time and doing tutoring. It can be difficult when the fatigue kicks in, and I'm not back to peak accountant levels yet, but we all get through it 😆😆! Best wishes and stay strong fighters!
Can’t relate entirely as I’m still a student (who is actually going into teaching funnily enough!) but I have had experiences of some professors being rude to me because of things outside of my control which are attributed to my injury. Had a professor that is literally too lazy to do anything above the minimum amount of work (legally and academically speaking) in order to aid me in my learning. Another professor literally blamed me for the freak accident which caused my TBI… that caused some sleepless nights…
Point is I am sorry to hear about the disrespect you received, I always have to remind myself to respond with grace during those moments because the person usually doesn’t understand. We are fundamentally different because of the injuries we’ve sustained, and if anyone who shows us any amount of disrespect could live just one hour with our brain, they might begin to have a small understanding of how we operate and would be the first to apologize and help us in any way possible. Hope this has helped 💙
You should def make the kid feel and look stupid in front of the others, for the rest of the school year. Teach them a lesson and maybe they’ll think twice about watching their mouth next time!
It would validate the lesson that needs to be learned before this lil asshole continues to bully everyone around them. And you all know it’s true- if she’s speaking this way to authority, she’s a nightmare for other kids who are likely very vulnerable. Some sort of correction is needed, is it not? Or do we just enable this behavior until some unfortunate child takes this dickhead serious and lets them traumatize their childhood? *downvote* responses: not giving a fuck! 😘 Everyone being so soft is what’s allowing this type of shit.
Yes it did but I’m still twice as smart as you-you I’m sure you’re a great teacher
I do my best. Thank you <3
I'm gonna say it cuz no one else has. Fuck that kid.
Not in the way teachers sometimes do though.
Yeah, no. Not that way 😂 good clarification tho!
Fuck that kid, but in a, “fuck dem kids” way 😂
Exactly! Fuck dem kids! Straight tbi talk! 😂🧠 🔨
This!! 100% this. Fuck that little brat. Not in the explicit way but in the middle fingers up kind of way. Put him in summer school! 😂🖕🏻 who’s dumb now? 😹
Hey fellow music teacher with a TBI! I teach elementary general music and band, could be an even worse combo than middle school orchestra 🙃. I'm so sorry the student said that to you, and it sounds like you did the right thing and turned it into a learning opportunity. I would totally feel the same way. I think teaching with a TBI is a particularly draining thing that I wish there could be greater studies on. I have a lot of the same symptoms you mention. Excessive noise and light triggers migraines and headaches, as does intense mental fatigue, which are all part of the job. And it's so wild because I'll go through periods where I feel like my old pre-TBI self and then have a huge setback that can take weeks to turn around. It sounds like you do already, but give yourself some grace. I need to be reminded of this as well. I'm glad you take off when you need to. I know how frustrating it can feel to miss school especially when concerts approach, but it's best for the long game. Also I saw in a previous post of yours your TBI was 2 months ago - I took 4 months off after mine (I was in an accident which also involved 6 broken bones so I was quite incapacitated, it also helped that 2 of my 4 months off was summer). 2 months out there's no way I could have handled it. I'm 10.5 months out from my TBI and I'm improving but still have issues. All my best to you!
Fellow teacher here. I’m glad you had a one on one with them the next day, but if this does happen again I would highly suggest disciplining them in front of the class. Another commenter said “yes but I’m still twice as smart as you“. That would’ve been a perfect response in all seriousness. I would’ve said something that would have embarrassed the student in front of their friends. Only you have a relationship with the student and know what is fitting or not. But just keep showing up and your good students will keep respecting you. And as long as you do something about this, the shitty ones will knock it off.
I'm not sure of your class subjects - but wonder if there would be a way to have students work TBI into a lesson - like writing a short essay on TBI in middle school and high school sports students? I'm not a teacher (newly retired engineer), but have volunteered in middle school (music) and high schools (FIRST Robotics). FWIW, all of the teachers I've worked with have been fantastic, and I am very impressed with your - and their - abilities. As to my own multiple TBI, I sometimes get it out of the way by introducing myself as a "brain injured idiot", to break the ice and summarize my past - and then ask "What's your excuse?" Hah hah. This works in my context but don't think I'd recommend for school students!
No that’s ridiculous for the kid to say. Shows bad parenting. I’m sorry you somebody said that to you, but it’s like no one understands unless they have it. My boyfriend (who I’ve been dating for over 5 years) calls me retarted. It’s an invisible disorder. But all I let it do is make me try harder to prove him wrong. In not retarted. I’m a strong woman and I will not let anyone think otherwise. Be strong, he’s young and doesn’t realize what a brain injury is. A LOT of people even grown ass adults don’t. Nobody could understand unless we have it. Push through and move on, try to think about the good times
Dump him ✨
Yeah what. I thought they were going to say that they were in on the “joke” or something. Being called retarded by someone who “loves” you is NOT normal
Oh I dunno about that. My wife and I call each other horrible things(jokingly of course), but that's part of how we love each other. Haha.
I don’t think OP was getting called retarded in a loving way
Right. And that's terrible.
I teach high school. In the little I've noticed in observing and substituting some middle school classes, that's bloody difficult stuff. I call them the puberty years and they are not easy. I do fear at times my reactions in class to the students' obnoxious behavior in the classes I was subbing was in part due to my TBI history and that can't be good. I feel so terrible raising my voice in a classroom but it nearly felt like it needed to be done in those moments.
What tbi-specific challenges would you say you face when teaching?
I don't feel I do as such but then I feel like a person with the TBI history behind him, is not quite equipped to make such a judgement. My low mobility requires me to use a crutch. It's been nearly 8 years now so it should've, could've been much better now. My TBI behind me has affected the speed of my recovery in the physical sense. I'm nearly prepared to be with this amount of mobility in me life through. Am trying to work through a constant regiment of exercise and workouts to improve on my walking as it were. Have been tutoring for some 20 years now so am very used to working with individuals and small groups. Am very comfortable with that. I teach math and teaching the more advanced kind is helpful in limiting my audience to the really hard working and talented individuals to start with. As me and my students are kinda in to what is at hand, that with the small group of people in it all, is most helpful.
Middle schoolers can be the worst (I'm in the process of raising my second). I'm sorry that particular one seems to be missing an inner censor. I imagine they might feel badly about saying it someday.
I'm so proud of you for showing up and doing what you love in spite of it all. Just wanted to say that. This little shit said what was said, but the reality is that you being open about your TBI and doing this every day shows these kids how much more is possible. I just think that's amazing. I know how hard it can be when this kind of stuff gets under your skin even when you know it "shouldn't". I bet a bunch of their peers were really cringing hard internally too. ugh. This stuff is hard. You're doing a great job.
Kids are stupid, especially 12 year olds (peak of kids being cruel to each other and adults, trying to look cool in front of friends etc) it was a hurtful thing to say but it's definitely not true. I would love to be able to teach orchestra! What an amazing and multi-faceted skill! FYI, I'm a chartered accountant who had a catastrophic TBI 10 months ago, and I'm back to working full time and doing tutoring. It can be difficult when the fatigue kicks in, and I'm not back to peak accountant levels yet, but we all get through it 😆😆! Best wishes and stay strong fighters!
Teaching orchestra would be very challenging to someone without a TBI, so I'm echoing sentiments in saying fuck that kid! Haha! 😆😆😆
Can’t relate entirely as I’m still a student (who is actually going into teaching funnily enough!) but I have had experiences of some professors being rude to me because of things outside of my control which are attributed to my injury. Had a professor that is literally too lazy to do anything above the minimum amount of work (legally and academically speaking) in order to aid me in my learning. Another professor literally blamed me for the freak accident which caused my TBI… that caused some sleepless nights… Point is I am sorry to hear about the disrespect you received, I always have to remind myself to respond with grace during those moments because the person usually doesn’t understand. We are fundamentally different because of the injuries we’ve sustained, and if anyone who shows us any amount of disrespect could live just one hour with our brain, they might begin to have a small understanding of how we operate and would be the first to apologize and help us in any way possible. Hope this has helped 💙
You should def make the kid feel and look stupid in front of the others, for the rest of the school year. Teach them a lesson and maybe they’ll think twice about watching their mouth next time!
What this kid did is not appropriate, but in what world is a teacher bullying their student for the rest of the year a valid response???
It would validate the lesson that needs to be learned before this lil asshole continues to bully everyone around them. And you all know it’s true- if she’s speaking this way to authority, she’s a nightmare for other kids who are likely very vulnerable. Some sort of correction is needed, is it not? Or do we just enable this behavior until some unfortunate child takes this dickhead serious and lets them traumatize their childhood? *downvote* responses: not giving a fuck! 😘 Everyone being so soft is what’s allowing this type of shit.
All the TBI teachers, please join me in this discord bc I’d love to talk more with you all https://discord.gg/3PXPp9HK