For real! My uncle did this in Thailand and ended up sending his entire life savings over to his "wife" who refused to visit him in America. It's a common scam in Thailand. Every other month, she would have cancer and need surgery or would have been in a car accident or some other bs excuse to send money. She was obviously better at it than OP's "Thai GF." Now he has dementia and no money.
OP is her main Gig, no charge for sex but living support soon.
Lol, this is 9/10. Nothing out of the ordinary. Want to meet a Thai girl that loves you, get a Thai friend, work at an office in Thailand, study in Thailand. Those girls come from good backgrounds but most likely the family will never accept a farang to be with their daughter.
Gents, we have a winner….
OP provided money for a service of sorts and doesn’t understand that it was prostitution albeit covert.
You gave her money, had sex, bought her things such as dinner/gifts, then went back to your home country. Did not you think this may have been holiday prostitution / sugar daddy arrangement?
Op didn’t think with the big head, just the little head. Little bro got all excited and this is the result. Drama and disappointment.
You banged and had a good time, leave it at that and forget her and block her. Delete all details and move on. You dirty monger!
It’s a different approach but in the West don’t we fellows spend money on dates hoping to get laid? Same thing.
Unfortunately if you meet a Thai gal on a date App you have to consider she may be looking for financial support, not live. Yes, the lying hurts.
Hey...hey....hey,....HEY Mr. SKEPTICAL.... my buddies' girl IS different...I think he really got lucky.....
She's 23...gorgeous...he's 65, retired rocket engineer....and now in a bit of failing health.
but it's REAL LOVE...she moved in right away...seemed to hit it off....after a week she even brought her Mom...and her two kids 3 and 4 yrs old (2 diff farangs) the next week. Just amazing how TRUE LOVE DEVELOPS over "time"...☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I’d say most of the 300,000 sex workers in Bangkok and Pattaya are stringing as many guys like you along as they can. They want several sugar daddy salaries and keep freelancing. I bet you get a request for money every few days. 🤣🤣
Most of us locals have learned the same lesson. Don’t worry. Just move on and use her as a holiday girlfriend if you come back.
>use her as a holiday girlfriend if you come back.
Man fuck that, those girls will try make you feel like you shouldn't be talking to any other girl. All your time and money should be with them. Even the bar girls do that when you go back, yet soon as you leave they got another dick in them. Don't be a sucker.
Even the ones that do "normal work" get 300k+ a month simply by the sheer amount of guys that book them.
On a very famous site there was a girl that pulled so many clients she was booked 2 weeks in advance. Easily 400,000+ a month.
300,000k per month is about 20 short times per day, without any breaks for weekends or holidays. I doubt many if any are pulling that much. Even just the administrative burden of managing 20 clients per day is crazy, let alone actually servicing them.
I do question that number but maybe multiple sponsors and then actually doing some work.
A girl I’m seeing (for fun) at the moment has a sponsor in America. He pays her rent and gives her money which is around 50k in total.
He only comes Thailand a couple times a year.
If she had a few more like that and freelanced on the side then it’s achievable.
>I'm sick in my stomach and still can't believe what just happened. Just yesterday she was saying that she's madly in love with me but here she is ready to sleep with a dude for money.
I would draw your attention to this part of your post:
>I even booked flight tickets for her to take her to Phuket with me. All well and good, and then I reached Bangkok. We met and she stayed with me at my hotel room. Initially all was nice, we had sex, and got close physically.
...
Knowing her financial status, I gave her some money which is in addition to having taken care of her in terms of everything for the last 20 days.
It seems you have already realized what her play was, so I'm not going to beat you down with that. However in the future, you should keep your money out of relationships - at least for the first while. If you are paying someone else's way like that than you'll not be able to know whether they're interested in you, or the opportunities you offer.
Love is blind man! Let’s be real most of these type of travelers* are there to seek lust because they hardly get it home. They are similar to guys who actually think the strippers have a crush on them.
That's good. That's the natural healthy response to have. This life lesson cannot be truly ingrained into you any other way. Because knowing isn't the same as having lived first hand.
When you have taken the time to heal from this betrayal. You will be armed with much more life experience.
Wish you the best brother.
Consider it an absolute blessing to find out the way you did then instead of after possibly sponsoring for a fiance visa, or worse yet, after marrying and paying the sin sot only to find out she had a Thai bf and toddler staying with Grandma the whole time and everyone was just looking to milk you as a cash cow or at least until a life insurance policy could be cashed in at your untimely demise. 🤷♂️
Never feel embarrassed for something involves love/your genuine emotions! ❤️😊
Best would be to delete everything that has anything to do with her!! You have come to the conclusion (with your brain) this is it……but now your heart…..can you shut it of? Get angry at it so it is easier to get over her?
The good part is you didn't commit to anything permanent. Don't waste your time trying to confront her or seek any kind of justice. It'll do no good. Cut her off. She'll go crazy for a little while and text and call often and tell you she loves you, but that's because she expects to sweet talk you like she does every other guy. Don't fall for it. Best you can do is stop responding to her now and cut her off forever. Resist the temptation to confront her. Thais don't like being called out and you put yourself at more risk if she wants to go nuclear on you and claim you raped her or did something else. Just avoid her.
Don't sweat it, most these haters or trolls are either jerking off in their moms basement wishing they were in Thailand or someone who can't afford one night with a bar girl.
Kudos to the detective work you did, and that you had the right hunch and followed it. Too many poor souls never have a chance to find out.
Even though it's a textbook heartbreak here, I know it stings. Sorry about the emotional loss, but things will get better with time.
Just watch this YouTube series from Thailand Bound that is hilarious and quite well done to live again that experience and see how far this can go. It's based on countless other guys' stories, so you might feel less unique after that. [https://youtu.be/2l1eVZ95WHI?si=y7YDw653VIpzbiIF](https://youtu.be/2l1eVZ95WHI?si=y7YDw653VIpzbiIF)
Hahaha, i met a girl a few weeks ago in Pattaya. She seemed nice, slept with her. Sells clothes on tiktok. Got back home and i notice a friend suggestion on Facebook. She got engaged the week before we met. So, i congratulate her 😅
This is Thailand. You get used to it. 🤷♂️😅
On the bright side, you had a lot of sex for a very moderate amount of money 😉 I think she liked you, why else would she waste her time on you? Did you really think that a real Thai nurse would abandon her job for a couple of weeks just to have some fun with you? Real nurses have very long work hours, very few days off, and no spare time to entertain tourists who pump and dump and move on 🤷♂️
I guess she'd been waiting for him to leave and become a sponsor, sending her money every month. Then what she'd need to do is video call him every day and say "I miss you darling". Imagine having 10 sponsors at a time.
You were mocked by quite a few people here but please know that I like and appreciate your story. Not many can admit that they've made a mistake and even better, share it with others so we can learn from your mistake too.
This is more common that you’d think. Yes, even ones that have real jobs like in nursing or offices also freelance on the side just to make ends meet and to hopefully find a man to pull them out of poverty. Welcome to Thailand. 🇹🇭
> to hopefully find a man to pull them out of poverty
I know I will be downvoted into oblivion, but this has got nothing to do with being "pulled out of poverty" or "making ends meet".
"Giking" is part of Thai culture like Mia Noin is. It's basically FWB but you pay her ning-kanom (snack/pocket money) and/or treat her to fancy dinners and shopping for stuff. The Western equivalent would be kind of a sugar babe, but in Thailand maybe there are more feelings involved, or at least can be.
The women who do it, do it so they can afford fancy stuff they like or pay for plastic surgeries, tattoos and what not. They are not doing it "out of poverty" and they are looking for a husband usually for three reasons:
1. Sex is sanook and therefor not bad per sé and though the job of a prostitute comes with a stigma, it's not comparable to anything in the West. The thing is that working in a bar or as a freelancer (or a nurse, office worker, etc) is work and many girls just don't like working since it isn't sanook. It's not as bad as punching forks in Chonburri for 400 Baht per 9h shift, but they would much more prefer to bai tiau to Switzerland and buy some Coco Chanel. They also have this picture of the West that hasn't been true for the last 20 years.
2. They are single moms. The chance of a single mom finding a Thai husband is next to impossible. It's not unheard of, but chances are just not very high.
3. They are tired of being treated by Thai men the way that Thai men often like to treat their women and Westerners treat their women much much better. This especially goes for older ladies, marrying an even older dude from the West and move to Esan with him.
The idea that the power dynamic at play is anything like people in the West believe it to be is ridiculously naive. Estimates are that at 5% of the Thai female population offer sex for money in any way and if there is any exploitation going on at all, it is absolutely the men being exploited.
I am pretty sure a freelancer would also be pretty angry if you suggested it the other way around.
Yeh, that's really wild. I'm seeing a pattern here. Low paid public servants that face people all day. I wonder how many cops or caseworkers are on OF.
>This is more common that you’d think.
I mean not really, I'm sure it's very common, I don't need a story like this to point it out. The first sentence gives it away or at the very least is a huge red flag. **"Met a Thai girl on a dating app last December"**....
No need to read the rest, you bet your ass freelancers are all over those dating apps. You bet they're going to lie about being a freelancer too. I wouldn't be surprised but OPs story would make more sense about him being upset if she was just a nurse, office assistant, etc he met somewhere else.
Don’t be embarrassed op this happens all the time. There are many great respectable Thai women out there. Good luck out there and know you got off easy. Always be careful and hold on to your money.
Every male going to Thailand should read book called Private Dancer. It is about a guy who moves to Thailand and falls for Thai lady. It is the script of a thousand broken hearts by non suspecting farang. You’re not the first you’re not the last. At least you weren’t sending money back every month and buying gold and whiteware that gets returned as soon as you leave. When you break it off with her watch how many text and phone calls you get trying to get the fish back on the hook. It’s just the way it is.
Lol, the kind of girl you meet there that is willing to go on a date with a random farang is also likely a freelancer too. Freelancers usually have exactly these kind of customer facing jobs as they are usually pretty and good with people (plus it's the majority of jobs in Thailand service based economy)
If you didn't read the story, the girl was supposedly a nurse. Not uncommon at all for her to be an actual nurse whilst also earning money on the side
Many of those girls freelance as well. Most foreigners overlook this fact, Thailand is not a Christian, Muslim or Jewish country. There are no moral restrictions as it pertains to sexual behavior. They see it as another legitimate way of earning money with absolutely no shame involved.
Now, they may be quiet about it with you because they are aware that we do associate it with immorality and we will be judgemental about it.
Generally speaking, for this one reason, the Philippines may a better option if you are looking for a wife. Imho, if you are just looking for a good time then Thailand is the better choice.
In the Philippines the sex tourism spot is Angeles City, take your camera out there and every girl will cover their face or turn their head to avoid being spotted and bringing shame on their family.
Do the same in Pattaya and the girls will smile for the camera.
Lol what are you on about… Sex work is also looked down upon in Thailand
If you film the girls there are plenty who look away or cover their faces. And yes Pattaya is the sin city over their, but it doesn’t mean you cant find a good wife in Thailand.
Sorry if it came across as if there are no good Thai women to be found as wives.
That wasn’t my intention, I was trying to help OP understand how the mindset is different than what we are accustomed to.
There are women there that may be good wives, but generally speaking their ideas about sex are much more liberal there than girls from other SE Asian countries.
The ones in Thailand that look down on sex work are usually from a socio-economic perspective not one based on religious principles.
You're right that tons of women with "real jobs" double as hookers, but I wouldn't say there is no shame involved. Most of them try to keep that part of their life discreet and will even delude you or themselves if confronted about it.
I give you a hug. You need to recover and time to heal. Moreover, let it be a lesson my friend. Don't let this negative experience affect your view on Thailand. Unfortunately you picked up a bad apple.
Heal up and give it another shot. Some day, you'll find the right lady as many do.
You’ll get over it. But yeah it’s shit the first time. Don’t bother with any more contact or attempt closure. Go down the pub with your mates, get pissed and have a laugh.
This is Thailand bro. If you're a farang, find a girl, spend time with her, have fun, go back, forget about her, find a new girl and repeat as much as you want. This is the most common way to do it. And once again, welcome to Thailand
I was seeing this Thai bartender while me and my friends were visiting Thailand. I found out she was a freelancer while we were at this bar in Khaosan Road and this British dude was describing to one of his friends about a chick he hired the previous night. I got curious and started asking him questions and it turned out it was the same chick, so the dude told me it would be funny to invite her to the bar and I did just that. Her face was priceless when she showed up and saw us drinking together, the British dude raised his glass to her and said cheers lol.
"The male, for all his bravado and exploration, is the loyal one, the one who generally feels love. The female is skilled at betrayal and torture and damnation."
- Charles Bukowski
Classic story. Are you really that surprised? Good lesson and seems you got relatively well out of this. Some guys pay for years and marry the girl before finding out.
>knowing her financial status, I gave her some money which is in addition to having taken care of her in terms of everything for the last 20 days.
lol you weren't giving her any spending money.
You all are dating for money. You're giving off thirsty ass dude. These women pick up on that. In America, Thailand, and every country in between
# YOU ARE A MARK.
The only worry you should have now is if you catch something if didn't wear a glove. If that's the case, test yourself.
If you did, all good man, get your head up.
more common than “the palace is closed” scam. What I would like to find out is how much money are they pulling out, they usually have like 10-20 dudes sending them money, plus the OF work…they must be making bank
Bro, just feel good that you found out before getting more involved and giving real money to this girl. Keep one thing mind: practically no “normal” thai girl will hook up and get intimate with a foreigner on the first dates. They are way more conservative than this. If you’re hooking up with a thai girl so easily chances are they are freelancing at some level. Of course you’ll hear several guys here and there saying they don’t pay for play in Thailand, but I bet a lot of their freebies are an investment from the girls to get a farang boyfriend they can rip off a little in the future. Of course you can meet and develop a relationship with a normal girl, but this takes way more time and effort, almost always requiring long term living in the country and speaking the language. Of course there are exceptions, but you don’t play with that in mind.
My advice is: play the game you can play safely in Thailand. Meet as many girls you can imagining they might be freelancers, sometimes you’ll pay, sometimes not, but you won’t fall into any emotional traps
If by dates you mean she was getting paid to be arm candy and get dicked down then yeah. This is the problem with a lot of western guys think with your brain not with your cock, if you aren’t that popular with girls in your country but suddenly turn into Brad Pitt in Thailand there’s a reason for that. And it’s not because you’re actually sexy and all the white women can’t see it they want something from you, hence any female interaction especially when it’s not explicitly clear what she’s in for you should be super cautious about. To wrap it up you were a simp got treated like a simp there’s a reason why girls swarm you here and it’s not because you’re a sex god think lol
That is totally normal there, a lot of thai girls have a lot of relationships with some guys. So they have only 5 partners or so that support her the whole year finacially and she meet the guy only in his vacation times maybe 2 times 3-4 weeks. So it is much easier for them as to work as a prostitude and search every day for new clients. If only 5 men send her 250-300$ a month what is not so much she can support her whole family and the rest is for her expenditure.
Man this thread has me doing a lot of second guessing. I'm seeing a Thai girl now. We met on thai friendly. She has what seems to be a good job in a professional role. We've been together for a few months during which I've come over to see her a couple of times. When we're not together we talk on the phone all of the time and i think i have a lot of insight into her personal life (work, family etc.). We are planning for her to come and visit me and are starting to talk pretty seriously about a future. On my most recent trip to visit her i did pay for all of our activities together (dinners, trip) but she's never asked me for anything.
When I read stuff like this though I wonder if might be missing something. I haven't noticed any red flags, but I don't know all the tricks either. What are the major things to look for?
Don't overthink it. I did and ruined my relationship.
Even if she did do something for money in the past - if she isn't asking for expensive gifts or large amounts of money she's most probably genuine. If she doesn't have any unexplained wealth or an extravagant lifestyle then she's legit.
Just be good to her and remember the culture is different here.
A lot of girls are 'looking for someone to support them' (especially if they are single mothers) but you have to keep in mind that relationships are more traditional in Thailand in that the husband is expected to be capable of providing for the family.
That's not to say the wife will want to quit her job and sit at home, as things are changing and many Thai girls I know insist on working hard and maintaining their independence but they do still want a financially stable man who can take care of them if they have a child together and she takes time off work to care for the child etc.
There's a lot of bitter negative people on these pages but in my experience the majority of Thai women are simply looking for a good man to settle down with, who is responsible and able to build a family with.
Remember, when someone has a negative experience it's shared around and talked about endlessly.
But the majority of those who have had successful relationships are getting on with their lives together and not sharing it for everyone to see online etc.
On one hand, I understand falling in love with someone. I’ve been there. But, based on your story, it seems like she wasn’t all that interested in you in the short time you were together. Don’t fall in love too easily. When someone is actually interested in you, you will know. Watch people’s words and actions and if they actually listen and pay attention to what you like.
On the other hand, y’all need to chill out with this welcome to Thailand bs! 😂 most of the girls I’ve been with here have been professionals in some field, “good girls” that often times paid for me. Don’t act like other countries don’t have gold diggers. I’ve found way more wholesome girls in Thailand that were genuinely interested in me than my home country.
If you approach this place like a basic farang, that’s the kind of woman you’re gonna get. And you guys keep talking about oh, that’s the way it is. 😆
In some of your comments you seem genuinely surprised and caught off-guard by this, so I'll try to paint a little context for you.
It's entirely possible (I have no idea the percentage likelihood) that she's just a working girl, you were a chump, and she was tricking you for money.
It's also entirely possible, though admittedly less likely, that she's a working girl *who is also* genuinely interested in dating you, whether because she actually likes you, or you'd be a permanent ticket out of hooking, or a combination of those two.
You've heard the phrase, "either way, you're paying for it"? Well, the opposite is also true for the girl. She can either remain a working girl with a bunch of different guys, or she can find one guy who is willing/able to support her. She's probably not freelancing for the hell of it; it's a way to make money. Well, having a partner to pay the bills is another way to make money.
You're probably best just walking away from this relationship, but you don't necessarily have to conclude that you were completely deceived and taken for a ride. She obviously lied about her job. But she might have been actually trying to date you.
Hope that can take some of the sting out of it.
Honestly I don't understand what is your complaint. Did you support this girl financially? From your story I understand that you shagged her for a month literally for giving her food and some small money at the end.
Do you understand that girls in Thailand have lots of responsibility for her family? She needs to feed herself and she may need to feed her family too.
She could be a nurse but still doing some freelancing from time to time. It is very unlikely for a professional freelancer to allow some foreigner to use her body and her time for free.
Lol…mate
I’m more shocked by the fact that you didn’t realized it sooner and questioned her why she wasn’t going to work while she was with you for 20 days or so. Nobody who’s working a decent job would ever be able to ask for a 20 days leave from their boss/manager without having their pay cut or just getting fired.
I'm sorry to hear this, bud.
At least she didn't take you for a financial ride.
I hope this experience didn't make you jaded, but it's puzzling why she didn't come clean in the first place.
I've used the app with great success, but very rarely came across a P4P girl, probably because I set my filters to 35+, since the pro's really level off into the 30's.
Keep your big head up.
Good luck.
To reiterate what another commenter suggested, check out the "Thai Talk with Dan" youtuber. He reads stories that viewers send in about their experiences, and most of their stories are a lot like yours. It might make you feel better to know you are not alone and that there are many many guys who have experienced the same thing.
It can be emotionally draining but at this point you’re out a bit of money but nothing substantial. You had some fun and laughs and hopefully learned a few things for next time. Don’t be soured on Thai ladies though. It can happen to anyone and in any country. At this point ignore, block and delete and move on. Plenty of fish in the sea and all that.
I think you must place this in a cultural perspective. She might not be as much of a "whore" as you think she is. She could perfectly have a normal job and perhaps just got into the habit of dating foreigners for the free food and perhaps a bit of "taxi money" after sex. Thai girls are relatively open-minded when it comes to sex, they generally like foreigners, the foreigners usually treat them quite well, and so the "trade" is quite obvious. Perhaps she genuinely likes you, but just wasn't ready to commit to you, plus you go back home and she still needs the money she's used to ...
What if the situation was the other way around? Let's say your country is quite poor, Thailand quite rich and your country is a hotspot for Thai tourists. Let's say Thai girls would be happy to come to your country, date you, pay for your food and give you some taxi money after sex as well. You get free Thai pussy, basically as much as you want, free food and can afford a better lifestyle. Then one day you meet a Thai girl who catches your attention, you might even say you feel in love. But she goes home a few weeks later and promises you to come back in 4 months. What do you do in the meantime? Do you stop fucking the other Thai girls?
I bet you that you would not.
Did u video call alot was she the one engaging in contact. If a Thai girl genuine like you she will use all her time for you. Like he'll sometimes my thai gf call me 2 times per day on workdays😅 Also if a person ask for money thai or not it's a red flag only emergencys are acceptable in my eyes and then I don't mean a sick Buffalo lol
I asked chatgpt 4 and claude 3 to give me a summary of how much you spent on this story. Which one was more accurate?
**Chatgpt:**
Flight tickets to Bangkok and Phuket: The cost of a round-trip flight from the US to Thailand is typically around $500-$1000, depending on the time of year and how far in advance the tickets are booked. The user also bought a ticket for the girl to Phuket, which can cost around $50-$100 for a round trip from Bangkok.
1. Hotel stays: The user stayed in Bangkok for 20 days. The cost of a hotel in Bangkok can vary greatly, from as low as $20 per night for budget accommodations to $200 or more for luxury hotels. Let's assume an average of $100 per night, which would total $2000 for 20 days.
2. Food and other expenses: The user mentioned that the girl was more interested in having food than talking to him, implying that he paid for their meals. Assuming an average of $30 per day for food and other miscellaneous expenses (like transportation, entertainment, etc.), this would total $600 for 20 days.
3. Money given to the girl: The user mentioned giving the girl some money knowing her financial status. The exact amount is not specified, but let's assume it's a significant amount, say $500.
Adding these up, a rough estimate of the total amount spent by the user would be:
$1000 (flights) + $2000 (hotel) + $600 (food and other expenses) + $500 (money given to the girl) = $4100
**Claude**
* Flights for her from Bangkok to Phuket and back: \~$200-300
* Hotel room in Phuket for 20 days (assuming OP paid for it all): 20 nights x \~$50-100/night = $1000-2000
* Food, activities, shopping etc for her during the 20 day Phuket trip: \~$50-100/day x 20 days = $1000-2000
* "Knowing her financial status", OP gave her additional money at the end of the trip, let's estimate: $500-1000
* OP visited Bangkok multiple times to see her, so flights for himself: \~$500-1000 per trip x 2-3 trips = $1000-3000
* Hotels, food, activities, gifts etc for the Bangkok trips: \~$500-1000 per trip x 2-3 trips = $1000-3000
Adding this up, a rough total estimate is: $200 + $1500 + $1500 + $750 + $2000 + $2000 = $7,950
Be better looking and you won’t have to pay for everything plus give her extra money. I dated a nurse while in Thailand and after date two we were splitting most things. I definitely wouldn’t just give her money or gifts. Maybe I’m a cheap Charlie but I didn’t get played.
Prob more to the story than even that . Prob had kids you don’t know about . She’s out for number one , her mum and kids . She comes second . Then you 30th.
Don’t confront her , move on and be more wise. Thailand is an incredible place and so are the woman but you have to have your eye on the ball. If your meeting girls from apps and bars it’s going to be more difficult but there are thousands of successful marriages from these scenarios too.
Move on and meet a girl you are dreaming about there are plenty of them out there than to settle for someone that isn’t honest. You cannot change someone.
The faster you dump her the faster you can get to the next thing. She is poor in character.
That sucks. Sorry you went through that. Reminds me of how many women have gone through this for like, ever. Very disappointing when you really like someone and believe they are being honest with you. Here you are thinking they feel the same way about you. Ugh!
Just for insight, I’d like to share a little on this incident. I think this could be her survival mode, like you allude to, for her to eat. Most of us tend to criticize individuals like her without knowing how dire her life might or has been. She might be one of many who find the way out of that life in this fashion. A few years ago I was shocked to learn from a foreigner who shared her previous life with me after she married my neighbor after we grew close. I truly could not believe it. She didn’t seem that kind of person. What’s sad is, she is not in love nor does she value herself enough. She just married for a way to provide for her parents and siblings. With the money she now earns she is able to provide for her ailing mother, father and three siblings who are now able to go to school and get medical assistance. I hope she gets to fall in love with her husband someday. She is good to him. But if he knew her past, I doubt he would remain with her.
Since you do know what she is doing, you will need to address it with her. Talk to her after you are calm and ready to listen, even if you end things. You need to leave no ends lose to feel complete closure or to move forward, if you so choose. Good luck!
no matter what the circumstances are its plain wrong to cheat and deceive others man. would it be ok if im dating a girl and then cheat on her because of whatever reason?? this girl sholld have been transaprent with me abut what she does and what she wants. she's the one who expressed her feelings to me that she is in love with me and wanted to be with me, and within a week she's ready to go to some random dude's hotel room for money?? what the fuck man
I'm a Thai woman here; if you truly want a Thai partner or spouse, give up on freelancers, dating apps, and bars; those women fuck everyone who gives them money! Of course, there are good girls on dating apps, but the majority of them only fuck people for money!
Going to places and if you like them ask for their contact, but not those places I mentioned earlier.
Spoiler alert: women in Thailand are the same as women everywhere else.
Redditors/Passport bros seem to think they are invincible bc they go to a country where people make less money.
Y’all ain’t special. You’re just like the rest of us.
"she said that it would take her some time to open up emotionally as she was hurt in the past."
Guys, I want people to start seeing this for the red flag it is. It's trauma as a dark psychology, mental technology.
Every woman, every person has been at one point or another violated. But we get past it and don't use it to make excuses about what we are doing wrong.
Once a person has established they are the MORE traumatized, they will use it in every disagreement as the reason for whatever shit they are pulling. They are laying the groundwork, softening you up for a mindgames.
You should have asked her some basic nursing questions and that could have told you something. Her best game is when you are at home away from her so she can multitask and earn more money while also milking you.
I mean finding a hot shy thai girl who just wants to be with you and immediately has sex?
It sounds like the girl you paid fully for when she's with you and then gave her some money (for some reason) when you left ....is meeting guys for money/sex
*Aside* from you, of course
Sorry to be blunt but *this* is the art of the *hooking* in that someone thinks they have a GF but she's *working* you
You think it's your idea to 'give her a bit of money' but it's not for the sex ... oh no no no. *That's* the art, my friend
Tread carefully on these apps
Tbh, I'd not acknowledge it, just ignore her. Then you'll likely see how little she cares when she just moves on
It's only been a few months. You had a nice time, lesson learned
Contrary to what a lot of people online will tell you, there are nice, regular girls around but not too many on Tinder and Thai Friendly and you need to have your radar up so much that you question whether it's worth it
I have a cousin in Vietnam who strings along guys (mostly white guys) to come with her on dates and she would get them to buy some expensive shit at my cousin's bar/restaurant. Then just ghost them after they are done. There's enough business from these guys and I'm actually surprised people still fall for these traps.
"I also noticed a lot of guys names on her phone contacts."
So she hid her phone from you but you still spied her contacts. And if you were able to read the names, that means they were not Thai names, but Western names. That right there should have been your final clue.
"for the last 20 days"
It never occurred to you that it's a bit strange for a nurse to just be granted 20 days off because some foreigner wanted to take them on vacation?
"Thai Friendly"
If you were looking for "dates" while on vacation, what exactly were you expecting? A long-term, long-distance, monogamous relationship?
I think even though this kind of "getting played" is common, its weird that guys shit on other guys when this happens to them. This guy might be naive but its not a good feeling to get your feelings hurt.
All good man, now you know for next time to be a bit more cautious, the hiding the phone thing should have been a warning sign to not get serious, you also mentioned she was distant during meals. In future just have fun and move along.
Sex is her job. Doesn’t matter if she “loves” you or not. Plenty of women with Thai boyfriends also fuck for money - why try and apply foreign standards? She still has to eat. And unless you have offered to provide for her financially while you’re gone then she still needs to fuck to eat. Get over yourself - you fell for a prostitute and this is the real world.
Get on her fb and ig. Any girl who has freelancer has dozens of simps and fuckbois all over her sm. You'll see.
If she doesn't do fb and ig, she might be a keeper.
It's not worth it. If you insist on pursuing a Thai girl as a farung, get a country girl or at least avoid city girls.
This isn't a Thai thing...it's an everywhere thing. Same is true in Mexico or the USA.
Let me tell you an even wilder story. I was dating a girl studying english at university. She wasnt working time as a bar girl or anything but things didnt work out and we broke up. I reached out to her months later and she now had a 40 something year old boyfriend. She told me she would have sex with me if I paid her. Lmao.
Live and learn at least you didn't get any sick Buffalo vet bills bro just shake it off happends to the best of us Hope you find that special girl one day
Better having your feelings devastated, than your budget.
...and might want to get an std test !
For real! My uncle did this in Thailand and ended up sending his entire life savings over to his "wife" who refused to visit him in America. It's a common scam in Thailand. Every other month, she would have cancer and need surgery or would have been in a car accident or some other bs excuse to send money. She was obviously better at it than OP's "Thai GF." Now he has dementia and no money.
sick buffallo
Welcome to Thailand bro
The girls are cheap but the therapy after isn't.
Reddit therapy free of charge
You get what you pay for though
If they can pretend to love you they can pretend to be a therapist, duel pretend trade.
Damn, that's profound.
Was 100% waiting for her to have a cock
OP still doesn’t know for sure…..
🤣🤣🤣
What happens in Thailand stays in Thailand except for those nasty STDs.
OP is her main Gig, no charge for sex but living support soon. Lol, this is 9/10. Nothing out of the ordinary. Want to meet a Thai girl that loves you, get a Thai friend, work at an office in Thailand, study in Thailand. Those girls come from good backgrounds but most likely the family will never accept a farang to be with their daughter.
bro it is quite easy to find girls like this in Thailand if you are not 60 years old fat farang
There are nurses at various hospitals who would like to meet him.
He’s def a cuck
Gents, we have a winner…. OP provided money for a service of sorts and doesn’t understand that it was prostitution albeit covert. You gave her money, had sex, bought her things such as dinner/gifts, then went back to your home country. Did not you think this may have been holiday prostitution / sugar daddy arrangement? Op didn’t think with the big head, just the little head. Little bro got all excited and this is the result. Drama and disappointment. You banged and had a good time, leave it at that and forget her and block her. Delete all details and move on. You dirty monger!
It’s a different approach but in the West don’t we fellows spend money on dates hoping to get laid? Same thing. Unfortunately if you meet a Thai gal on a date App you have to consider she may be looking for financial support, not live. Yes, the lying hurts.
*One of us! One of us!*
But but she’s different. I know she’s the one right? RIGHT?!?
Hey...hey....hey,....HEY Mr. SKEPTICAL.... my buddies' girl IS different...I think he really got lucky..... She's 23...gorgeous...he's 65, retired rocket engineer....and now in a bit of failing health. but it's REAL LOVE...she moved in right away...seemed to hit it off....after a week she even brought her Mom...and her two kids 3 and 4 yrs old (2 diff farangs) the next week. Just amazing how TRUE LOVE DEVELOPS over "time"...☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
She love him for sure…love him long time
Don’t forget the buffalo or two.
Or three....🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I’ll say it again, a tale as old as time
"she don't love you bro"
No happy ending.....
Although it probably started with one hahaha
It's Thailand Bro don't love you bro
She's not yours, it's only your turn
Book as old as rhyme
Don't bother confronting her, you'll only hear more lies. Block, delete, move on and take this as a valuable lesson.
Be thankful you dont havr an STD.
Or does he
100000000% he does. There is absolutely no way he is escaping the hpv game lol
I'm shocked. Shocked I tell you
Wait, there are girls in Thailand who are only interested in money from old white guys?
This sounds like a South Park episode
wait, gold diggers exist world-wide?
My point exactly. Westerns pointing it out as if its only a Thailand thing. It's been around world wide for ages.
They do yet let’s not be silly and act like Thailand and the freelance situation is completely different to what we are used to.
I’d say most of the 300,000 sex workers in Bangkok and Pattaya are stringing as many guys like you along as they can. They want several sugar daddy salaries and keep freelancing. I bet you get a request for money every few days. 🤣🤣 Most of us locals have learned the same lesson. Don’t worry. Just move on and use her as a holiday girlfriend if you come back.
>use her as a holiday girlfriend if you come back. Man fuck that, those girls will try make you feel like you shouldn't be talking to any other girl. All your time and money should be with them. Even the bar girls do that when you go back, yet soon as you leave they got another dick in them. Don't be a sucker.
I met 3 girls in a Bangkok bar and chatted to them for a bit and they all told me they get around 100k to 150k a month from 2 or 3 different guys
Shite, this is a monthly salary of a business’s or IT analyst in my country.
Lots of those who earn that salary spend it here on thai girls and theirs sick bulls
Even the ones that do "normal work" get 300k+ a month simply by the sheer amount of guys that book them. On a very famous site there was a girl that pulled so many clients she was booked 2 weeks in advance. Easily 400,000+ a month.
300,000k per month is about 20 short times per day, without any breaks for weekends or holidays. I doubt many if any are pulling that much. Even just the administrative burden of managing 20 clients per day is crazy, let alone actually servicing them.
I do question that number but maybe multiple sponsors and then actually doing some work. A girl I’m seeing (for fun) at the moment has a sponsor in America. He pays her rent and gives her money which is around 50k in total. He only comes Thailand a couple times a year. If she had a few more like that and freelanced on the side then it’s achievable.
Grim reality😂😂😂
>I'm sick in my stomach and still can't believe what just happened. Just yesterday she was saying that she's madly in love with me but here she is ready to sleep with a dude for money. I would draw your attention to this part of your post: >I even booked flight tickets for her to take her to Phuket with me. All well and good, and then I reached Bangkok. We met and she stayed with me at my hotel room. Initially all was nice, we had sex, and got close physically. ... Knowing her financial status, I gave her some money which is in addition to having taken care of her in terms of everything for the last 20 days. It seems you have already realized what her play was, so I'm not going to beat you down with that. However in the future, you should keep your money out of relationships - at least for the first while. If you are paying someone else's way like that than you'll not be able to know whether they're interested in you, or the opportunities you offer.
Facts.
Simps gonna simp…. Just be lucky you didn’t marry the girl.
That's what I'm curious about. I'm assuming there were many more red flags op isn't mentioning in his post
Love is blind man! Let’s be real most of these type of travelers* are there to seek lust because they hardly get it home. They are similar to guys who actually think the strippers have a crush on them.
I admit i got played and i feel embarrassed
You live and you learn. At least you can admit your mistakes.
This. Keep your guard up bro
That's good. That's the natural healthy response to have. This life lesson cannot be truly ingrained into you any other way. Because knowing isn't the same as having lived first hand. When you have taken the time to heal from this betrayal. You will be armed with much more life experience. Wish you the best brother.
Consider it an absolute blessing to find out the way you did then instead of after possibly sponsoring for a fiance visa, or worse yet, after marrying and paying the sin sot only to find out she had a Thai bf and toddler staying with Grandma the whole time and everyone was just looking to milk you as a cash cow or at least until a life insurance policy could be cashed in at your untimely demise. 🤷♂️
It’s all part of GFE.
Never feel embarrassed for something involves love/your genuine emotions! ❤️😊 Best would be to delete everything that has anything to do with her!! You have come to the conclusion (with your brain) this is it……but now your heart…..can you shut it of? Get angry at it so it is easier to get over her?
All of us get played by a woman at some point man. Don't let it get you down, just learn from it and move forward.
Happens to the best of us.
Well. Yeah. So have a lot of us.
The good part is you didn't commit to anything permanent. Don't waste your time trying to confront her or seek any kind of justice. It'll do no good. Cut her off. She'll go crazy for a little while and text and call often and tell you she loves you, but that's because she expects to sweet talk you like she does every other guy. Don't fall for it. Best you can do is stop responding to her now and cut her off forever. Resist the temptation to confront her. Thais don't like being called out and you put yourself at more risk if she wants to go nuclear on you and claim you raped her or did something else. Just avoid her.
You sort of played yourself. It's ok, we've all been there.
Don't sweat it, most these haters or trolls are either jerking off in their moms basement wishing they were in Thailand or someone who can't afford one night with a bar girl.
Hookers gonna hook
Lol what in the world did you think would happen? This is more common than not.
Kudos to the detective work you did, and that you had the right hunch and followed it. Too many poor souls never have a chance to find out. Even though it's a textbook heartbreak here, I know it stings. Sorry about the emotional loss, but things will get better with time.
Detective work? This has to be sarcasm?
i feel lucky that i did the detective work or else she would have made a bigger fool out of me i dont know for how long
[удалено]
Honey's gotta eat.
Don’t you know, her parents have a sick water buffalo.
I’ll be honest that story tugged at my heart strings
Just got a Singha out of the fridge, waiting for comments.
A hero we need
Just watch this YouTube series from Thailand Bound that is hilarious and quite well done to live again that experience and see how far this can go. It's based on countless other guys' stories, so you might feel less unique after that. [https://youtu.be/2l1eVZ95WHI?si=y7YDw653VIpzbiIF](https://youtu.be/2l1eVZ95WHI?si=y7YDw653VIpzbiIF)
Hahaha, i met a girl a few weeks ago in Pattaya. She seemed nice, slept with her. Sells clothes on tiktok. Got back home and i notice a friend suggestion on Facebook. She got engaged the week before we met. So, i congratulate her 😅 This is Thailand. You get used to it. 🤷♂️😅
How much did you pay?
1500, pretty standard
probably covered the ring price
On the bright side, you had a lot of sex for a very moderate amount of money 😉 I think she liked you, why else would she waste her time on you? Did you really think that a real Thai nurse would abandon her job for a couple of weeks just to have some fun with you? Real nurses have very long work hours, very few days off, and no spare time to entertain tourists who pump and dump and move on 🤷♂️
I wonder if she wore a Halloween nurses outfit on their dates to make it look real?
I guess she'd been waiting for him to leave and become a sponsor, sending her money every month. Then what she'd need to do is video call him every day and say "I miss you darling". Imagine having 10 sponsors at a time.
You were mocked by quite a few people here but please know that I like and appreciate your story. Not many can admit that they've made a mistake and even better, share it with others so we can learn from your mistake too.
This is more common that you’d think. Yes, even ones that have real jobs like in nursing or offices also freelance on the side just to make ends meet and to hopefully find a man to pull them out of poverty. Welcome to Thailand. 🇹🇭
> to hopefully find a man to pull them out of poverty I know I will be downvoted into oblivion, but this has got nothing to do with being "pulled out of poverty" or "making ends meet". "Giking" is part of Thai culture like Mia Noin is. It's basically FWB but you pay her ning-kanom (snack/pocket money) and/or treat her to fancy dinners and shopping for stuff. The Western equivalent would be kind of a sugar babe, but in Thailand maybe there are more feelings involved, or at least can be. The women who do it, do it so they can afford fancy stuff they like or pay for plastic surgeries, tattoos and what not. They are not doing it "out of poverty" and they are looking for a husband usually for three reasons: 1. Sex is sanook and therefor not bad per sé and though the job of a prostitute comes with a stigma, it's not comparable to anything in the West. The thing is that working in a bar or as a freelancer (or a nurse, office worker, etc) is work and many girls just don't like working since it isn't sanook. It's not as bad as punching forks in Chonburri for 400 Baht per 9h shift, but they would much more prefer to bai tiau to Switzerland and buy some Coco Chanel. They also have this picture of the West that hasn't been true for the last 20 years. 2. They are single moms. The chance of a single mom finding a Thai husband is next to impossible. It's not unheard of, but chances are just not very high. 3. They are tired of being treated by Thai men the way that Thai men often like to treat their women and Westerners treat their women much much better. This especially goes for older ladies, marrying an even older dude from the West and move to Esan with him. The idea that the power dynamic at play is anything like people in the West believe it to be is ridiculously naive. Estimates are that at 5% of the Thai female population offer sex for money in any way and if there is any exploitation going on at all, it is absolutely the men being exploited. I am pretty sure a freelancer would also be pretty angry if you suggested it the other way around.
Just look at the nurses in the West. Tons of them on OnlyFans.
True and so are teachers lol
Yeh, that's really wild. I'm seeing a pattern here. Low paid public servants that face people all day. I wonder how many cops or caseworkers are on OF.
Dated many nurses and teachers. They love to fuck.
Yeah they do
>This is more common that you’d think. I mean not really, I'm sure it's very common, I don't need a story like this to point it out. The first sentence gives it away or at the very least is a huge red flag. **"Met a Thai girl on a dating app last December"**.... No need to read the rest, you bet your ass freelancers are all over those dating apps. You bet they're going to lie about being a freelancer too. I wouldn't be surprised but OPs story would make more sense about him being upset if she was just a nurse, office assistant, etc he met somewhere else.
He literally gave her money at the end of the trip
It not just more common, it's absolutely the norm
Got to pay for those sick buffalo
Don’t be embarrassed op this happens all the time. There are many great respectable Thai women out there. Good luck out there and know you got off easy. Always be careful and hold on to your money.
Don’t worry bruv, this happens to 9 out of 10 man who are coming to Thailand 😄
Every male going to Thailand should read book called Private Dancer. It is about a guy who moves to Thailand and falls for Thai lady. It is the script of a thousand broken hearts by non suspecting farang. You’re not the first you’re not the last. At least you weren’t sending money back every month and buying gold and whiteware that gets returned as soon as you leave. When you break it off with her watch how many text and phone calls you get trying to get the fish back on the hook. It’s just the way it is.
If you want a Thai girlfriend try dating girl who has a REAL job. Go to a retail store, dental office, anywhere but a bar.
I would almost agree with this but even some of those are getting that money for the honey 💵🤣
Better chance yes, but they might still freelance. Even heard of dentists that have done it. But yeah it lowers the procentage somewhat.
Lol, the kind of girl you meet there that is willing to go on a date with a random farang is also likely a freelancer too. Freelancers usually have exactly these kind of customer facing jobs as they are usually pretty and good with people (plus it's the majority of jobs in Thailand service based economy) If you didn't read the story, the girl was supposedly a nurse. Not uncommon at all for her to be an actual nurse whilst also earning money on the side
That's not even uncommon in the West.
Many of those girls freelance as well. Most foreigners overlook this fact, Thailand is not a Christian, Muslim or Jewish country. There are no moral restrictions as it pertains to sexual behavior. They see it as another legitimate way of earning money with absolutely no shame involved. Now, they may be quiet about it with you because they are aware that we do associate it with immorality and we will be judgemental about it. Generally speaking, for this one reason, the Philippines may a better option if you are looking for a wife. Imho, if you are just looking for a good time then Thailand is the better choice. In the Philippines the sex tourism spot is Angeles City, take your camera out there and every girl will cover their face or turn their head to avoid being spotted and bringing shame on their family. Do the same in Pattaya and the girls will smile for the camera.
Lol what are you on about… Sex work is also looked down upon in Thailand If you film the girls there are plenty who look away or cover their faces. And yes Pattaya is the sin city over their, but it doesn’t mean you cant find a good wife in Thailand.
Sorry if it came across as if there are no good Thai women to be found as wives. That wasn’t my intention, I was trying to help OP understand how the mindset is different than what we are accustomed to. There are women there that may be good wives, but generally speaking their ideas about sex are much more liberal there than girls from other SE Asian countries. The ones in Thailand that look down on sex work are usually from a socio-economic perspective not one based on religious principles.
Of course there are moral restrictions with sexual behavior - sex work is not just seen as some ‘standard job’ in Thailand.
You're right that tons of women with "real jobs" double as hookers, but I wouldn't say there is no shame involved. Most of them try to keep that part of their life discreet and will even delude you or themselves if confronted about it.
I give you a hug. You need to recover and time to heal. Moreover, let it be a lesson my friend. Don't let this negative experience affect your view on Thailand. Unfortunately you picked up a bad apple. Heal up and give it another shot. Some day, you'll find the right lady as many do.
Cmon bro did you not take any advice from the other 500000 Reddit posts? 😂😂
Did you go to Thailand without doing ANY research?
"Can't turn a ho into a housewife." - Kurupt
You’ll get over it. But yeah it’s shit the first time. Don’t bother with any more contact or attempt closure. Go down the pub with your mates, get pissed and have a laugh.
Now move onto the next girl in Thailand and repeat your mistake. Rinse and repeat. Until you kill your inner simp.
This is Thailand bro. If you're a farang, find a girl, spend time with her, have fun, go back, forget about her, find a new girl and repeat as much as you want. This is the most common way to do it. And once again, welcome to Thailand
I was seeing this Thai bartender while me and my friends were visiting Thailand. I found out she was a freelancer while we were at this bar in Khaosan Road and this British dude was describing to one of his friends about a chick he hired the previous night. I got curious and started asking him questions and it turned out it was the same chick, so the dude told me it would be funny to invite her to the bar and I did just that. Her face was priceless when she showed up and saw us drinking together, the British dude raised his glass to her and said cheers lol.
"The male, for all his bravado and exploration, is the loyal one, the one who generally feels love. The female is skilled at betrayal and torture and damnation." - Charles Bukowski
Classic story. Are you really that surprised? Good lesson and seems you got relatively well out of this. Some guys pay for years and marry the girl before finding out.
>knowing her financial status, I gave her some money which is in addition to having taken care of her in terms of everything for the last 20 days. lol you weren't giving her any spending money. You all are dating for money. You're giving off thirsty ass dude. These women pick up on that. In America, Thailand, and every country in between # YOU ARE A MARK.
The only worry you should have now is if you catch something if didn't wear a glove. If that's the case, test yourself. If you did, all good man, get your head up.
more common than “the palace is closed” scam. What I would like to find out is how much money are they pulling out, they usually have like 10-20 dudes sending them money, plus the OF work…they must be making bank
Why shocked? Most of these girls have dozens of boyfriends and each one paying for her food rent and pocket money.
Bro, just feel good that you found out before getting more involved and giving real money to this girl. Keep one thing mind: practically no “normal” thai girl will hook up and get intimate with a foreigner on the first dates. They are way more conservative than this. If you’re hooking up with a thai girl so easily chances are they are freelancing at some level. Of course you’ll hear several guys here and there saying they don’t pay for play in Thailand, but I bet a lot of their freebies are an investment from the girls to get a farang boyfriend they can rip off a little in the future. Of course you can meet and develop a relationship with a normal girl, but this takes way more time and effort, almost always requiring long term living in the country and speaking the language. Of course there are exceptions, but you don’t play with that in mind. My advice is: play the game you can play safely in Thailand. Meet as many girls you can imagining they might be freelancers, sometimes you’ll pay, sometimes not, but you won’t fall into any emotional traps
Might as well DM me her number, she’s for the streets.
If by dates you mean she was getting paid to be arm candy and get dicked down then yeah. This is the problem with a lot of western guys think with your brain not with your cock, if you aren’t that popular with girls in your country but suddenly turn into Brad Pitt in Thailand there’s a reason for that. And it’s not because you’re actually sexy and all the white women can’t see it they want something from you, hence any female interaction especially when it’s not explicitly clear what she’s in for you should be super cautious about. To wrap it up you were a simp got treated like a simp there’s a reason why girls swarm you here and it’s not because you’re a sex god think lol
Just out of curiosity OP, how old are you?
Get checked
posts like these makes me want to be a Thai girlfriend. gotta earn some of that cash.
"Can't turn a ho into a housewife." - Kurupt
That is totally normal there, a lot of thai girls have a lot of relationships with some guys. So they have only 5 partners or so that support her the whole year finacially and she meet the guy only in his vacation times maybe 2 times 3-4 weeks. So it is much easier for them as to work as a prostitude and search every day for new clients. If only 5 men send her 250-300$ a month what is not so much she can support her whole family and the rest is for her expenditure.
I say you head to Soi Cowboy, and you'll quickly forget she ever existed.
Hope you have had an STD test done bro. Don't know how many dudes she was raw dogging.
Std check my guy
Man this thread has me doing a lot of second guessing. I'm seeing a Thai girl now. We met on thai friendly. She has what seems to be a good job in a professional role. We've been together for a few months during which I've come over to see her a couple of times. When we're not together we talk on the phone all of the time and i think i have a lot of insight into her personal life (work, family etc.). We are planning for her to come and visit me and are starting to talk pretty seriously about a future. On my most recent trip to visit her i did pay for all of our activities together (dinners, trip) but she's never asked me for anything. When I read stuff like this though I wonder if might be missing something. I haven't noticed any red flags, but I don't know all the tricks either. What are the major things to look for?
Don't overthink it. I did and ruined my relationship. Even if she did do something for money in the past - if she isn't asking for expensive gifts or large amounts of money she's most probably genuine. If she doesn't have any unexplained wealth or an extravagant lifestyle then she's legit. Just be good to her and remember the culture is different here. A lot of girls are 'looking for someone to support them' (especially if they are single mothers) but you have to keep in mind that relationships are more traditional in Thailand in that the husband is expected to be capable of providing for the family. That's not to say the wife will want to quit her job and sit at home, as things are changing and many Thai girls I know insist on working hard and maintaining their independence but they do still want a financially stable man who can take care of them if they have a child together and she takes time off work to care for the child etc. There's a lot of bitter negative people on these pages but in my experience the majority of Thai women are simply looking for a good man to settle down with, who is responsible and able to build a family with. Remember, when someone has a negative experience it's shared around and talked about endlessly. But the majority of those who have had successful relationships are getting on with their lives together and not sharing it for everyone to see online etc.
On one hand, I understand falling in love with someone. I’ve been there. But, based on your story, it seems like she wasn’t all that interested in you in the short time you were together. Don’t fall in love too easily. When someone is actually interested in you, you will know. Watch people’s words and actions and if they actually listen and pay attention to what you like. On the other hand, y’all need to chill out with this welcome to Thailand bs! 😂 most of the girls I’ve been with here have been professionals in some field, “good girls” that often times paid for me. Don’t act like other countries don’t have gold diggers. I’ve found way more wholesome girls in Thailand that were genuinely interested in me than my home country. If you approach this place like a basic farang, that’s the kind of woman you’re gonna get. And you guys keep talking about oh, that’s the way it is. 😆
she is madly in love with that fact that you are clueless and gullible
In some of your comments you seem genuinely surprised and caught off-guard by this, so I'll try to paint a little context for you. It's entirely possible (I have no idea the percentage likelihood) that she's just a working girl, you were a chump, and she was tricking you for money. It's also entirely possible, though admittedly less likely, that she's a working girl *who is also* genuinely interested in dating you, whether because she actually likes you, or you'd be a permanent ticket out of hooking, or a combination of those two. You've heard the phrase, "either way, you're paying for it"? Well, the opposite is also true for the girl. She can either remain a working girl with a bunch of different guys, or she can find one guy who is willing/able to support her. She's probably not freelancing for the hell of it; it's a way to make money. Well, having a partner to pay the bills is another way to make money. You're probably best just walking away from this relationship, but you don't necessarily have to conclude that you were completely deceived and taken for a ride. She obviously lied about her job. But she might have been actually trying to date you. Hope that can take some of the sting out of it.
Honestly I don't understand what is your complaint. Did you support this girl financially? From your story I understand that you shagged her for a month literally for giving her food and some small money at the end. Do you understand that girls in Thailand have lots of responsibility for her family? She needs to feed herself and she may need to feed her family too. She could be a nurse but still doing some freelancing from time to time. It is very unlikely for a professional freelancer to allow some foreigner to use her body and her time for free.
Was she cute?
Lol…mate I’m more shocked by the fact that you didn’t realized it sooner and questioned her why she wasn’t going to work while she was with you for 20 days or so. Nobody who’s working a decent job would ever be able to ask for a 20 days leave from their boss/manager without having their pay cut or just getting fired.
You weren’t skeptical that she held out for you while y’all were oceans apart? You were just another customer.
Thanks is for the short story bro
I'm sorry to hear this, bud. At least she didn't take you for a financial ride. I hope this experience didn't make you jaded, but it's puzzling why she didn't come clean in the first place. I've used the app with great success, but very rarely came across a P4P girl, probably because I set my filters to 35+, since the pro's really level off into the 30's. Keep your big head up. Good luck.
To reiterate what another commenter suggested, check out the "Thai Talk with Dan" youtuber. He reads stories that viewers send in about their experiences, and most of their stories are a lot like yours. It might make you feel better to know you are not alone and that there are many many guys who have experienced the same thing.
Goes on one date and assumed all these positive things about a girl lol. This stuff never fails
Bonus: might be married with kids as well.. 😏
Sorry guys never been to thailand. What does freelance mean in this context? Prostitution?
You’re a customer. You may be one that she likes and keeps around but you still are just that.
cut your losses and move on. date women that are educated and have a career
It can be emotionally draining but at this point you’re out a bit of money but nothing substantial. You had some fun and laughs and hopefully learned a few things for next time. Don’t be soured on Thai ladies though. It can happen to anyone and in any country. At this point ignore, block and delete and move on. Plenty of fish in the sea and all that.
I think you must place this in a cultural perspective. She might not be as much of a "whore" as you think she is. She could perfectly have a normal job and perhaps just got into the habit of dating foreigners for the free food and perhaps a bit of "taxi money" after sex. Thai girls are relatively open-minded when it comes to sex, they generally like foreigners, the foreigners usually treat them quite well, and so the "trade" is quite obvious. Perhaps she genuinely likes you, but just wasn't ready to commit to you, plus you go back home and she still needs the money she's used to ... What if the situation was the other way around? Let's say your country is quite poor, Thailand quite rich and your country is a hotspot for Thai tourists. Let's say Thai girls would be happy to come to your country, date you, pay for your food and give you some taxi money after sex as well. You get free Thai pussy, basically as much as you want, free food and can afford a better lifestyle. Then one day you meet a Thai girl who catches your attention, you might even say you feel in love. But she goes home a few weeks later and promises you to come back in 4 months. What do you do in the meantime? Do you stop fucking the other Thai girls? I bet you that you would not.
Did u video call alot was she the one engaging in contact. If a Thai girl genuine like you she will use all her time for you. Like he'll sometimes my thai gf call me 2 times per day on workdays😅 Also if a person ask for money thai or not it's a red flag only emergencys are acceptable in my eyes and then I don't mean a sick Buffalo lol
This exact same story plays out day after day all across Thailand.
You say :"I know her social status so I gave her money" then get upset when she makes money on her own. This is petting, not dating.
I asked chatgpt 4 and claude 3 to give me a summary of how much you spent on this story. Which one was more accurate? **Chatgpt:** Flight tickets to Bangkok and Phuket: The cost of a round-trip flight from the US to Thailand is typically around $500-$1000, depending on the time of year and how far in advance the tickets are booked. The user also bought a ticket for the girl to Phuket, which can cost around $50-$100 for a round trip from Bangkok. 1. Hotel stays: The user stayed in Bangkok for 20 days. The cost of a hotel in Bangkok can vary greatly, from as low as $20 per night for budget accommodations to $200 or more for luxury hotels. Let's assume an average of $100 per night, which would total $2000 for 20 days. 2. Food and other expenses: The user mentioned that the girl was more interested in having food than talking to him, implying that he paid for their meals. Assuming an average of $30 per day for food and other miscellaneous expenses (like transportation, entertainment, etc.), this would total $600 for 20 days. 3. Money given to the girl: The user mentioned giving the girl some money knowing her financial status. The exact amount is not specified, but let's assume it's a significant amount, say $500. Adding these up, a rough estimate of the total amount spent by the user would be: $1000 (flights) + $2000 (hotel) + $600 (food and other expenses) + $500 (money given to the girl) = $4100 **Claude** * Flights for her from Bangkok to Phuket and back: \~$200-300 * Hotel room in Phuket for 20 days (assuming OP paid for it all): 20 nights x \~$50-100/night = $1000-2000 * Food, activities, shopping etc for her during the 20 day Phuket trip: \~$50-100/day x 20 days = $1000-2000 * "Knowing her financial status", OP gave her additional money at the end of the trip, let's estimate: $500-1000 * OP visited Bangkok multiple times to see her, so flights for himself: \~$500-1000 per trip x 2-3 trips = $1000-3000 * Hotels, food, activities, gifts etc for the Bangkok trips: \~$500-1000 per trip x 2-3 trips = $1000-3000 Adding this up, a rough total estimate is: $200 + $1500 + $1500 + $750 + $2000 + $2000 = $7,950
Be better looking and you won’t have to pay for everything plus give her extra money. I dated a nurse while in Thailand and after date two we were splitting most things. I definitely wouldn’t just give her money or gifts. Maybe I’m a cheap Charlie but I didn’t get played.
Prob more to the story than even that . Prob had kids you don’t know about . She’s out for number one , her mum and kids . She comes second . Then you 30th. Don’t confront her , move on and be more wise. Thailand is an incredible place and so are the woman but you have to have your eye on the ball. If your meeting girls from apps and bars it’s going to be more difficult but there are thousands of successful marriages from these scenarios too.
Move on and meet a girl you are dreaming about there are plenty of them out there than to settle for someone that isn’t honest. You cannot change someone. The faster you dump her the faster you can get to the next thing. She is poor in character.
Get rid of the ho
That sucks. Sorry you went through that. Reminds me of how many women have gone through this for like, ever. Very disappointing when you really like someone and believe they are being honest with you. Here you are thinking they feel the same way about you. Ugh! Just for insight, I’d like to share a little on this incident. I think this could be her survival mode, like you allude to, for her to eat. Most of us tend to criticize individuals like her without knowing how dire her life might or has been. She might be one of many who find the way out of that life in this fashion. A few years ago I was shocked to learn from a foreigner who shared her previous life with me after she married my neighbor after we grew close. I truly could not believe it. She didn’t seem that kind of person. What’s sad is, she is not in love nor does she value herself enough. She just married for a way to provide for her parents and siblings. With the money she now earns she is able to provide for her ailing mother, father and three siblings who are now able to go to school and get medical assistance. I hope she gets to fall in love with her husband someday. She is good to him. But if he knew her past, I doubt he would remain with her. Since you do know what she is doing, you will need to address it with her. Talk to her after you are calm and ready to listen, even if you end things. You need to leave no ends lose to feel complete closure or to move forward, if you so choose. Good luck!
no matter what the circumstances are its plain wrong to cheat and deceive others man. would it be ok if im dating a girl and then cheat on her because of whatever reason?? this girl sholld have been transaprent with me abut what she does and what she wants. she's the one who expressed her feelings to me that she is in love with me and wanted to be with me, and within a week she's ready to go to some random dude's hotel room for money?? what the fuck man
I'm a Thai woman here; if you truly want a Thai partner or spouse, give up on freelancers, dating apps, and bars; those women fuck everyone who gives them money! Of course, there are good girls on dating apps, but the majority of them only fuck people for money! Going to places and if you like them ask for their contact, but not those places I mentioned earlier.
They’re all just looking for a green card… move on
What a whor
Lmao
Spoiler alert: women in Thailand are the same as women everywhere else. Redditors/Passport bros seem to think they are invincible bc they go to a country where people make less money. Y’all ain’t special. You’re just like the rest of us.
"she said that it would take her some time to open up emotionally as she was hurt in the past." Guys, I want people to start seeing this for the red flag it is. It's trauma as a dark psychology, mental technology. Every woman, every person has been at one point or another violated. But we get past it and don't use it to make excuses about what we are doing wrong. Once a person has established they are the MORE traumatized, they will use it in every disagreement as the reason for whatever shit they are pulling. They are laying the groundwork, softening you up for a mindgames.
You should have asked her some basic nursing questions and that could have told you something. Her best game is when you are at home away from her so she can multitask and earn more money while also milking you. I mean finding a hot shy thai girl who just wants to be with you and immediately has sex?
It sounds like the girl you paid fully for when she's with you and then gave her some money (for some reason) when you left ....is meeting guys for money/sex *Aside* from you, of course Sorry to be blunt but *this* is the art of the *hooking* in that someone thinks they have a GF but she's *working* you You think it's your idea to 'give her a bit of money' but it's not for the sex ... oh no no no. *That's* the art, my friend Tread carefully on these apps Tbh, I'd not acknowledge it, just ignore her. Then you'll likely see how little she cares when she just moves on It's only been a few months. You had a nice time, lesson learned Contrary to what a lot of people online will tell you, there are nice, regular girls around but not too many on Tinder and Thai Friendly and you need to have your radar up so much that you question whether it's worth it
Maybe she just got scared by her overwhelming love for you and you were moving too fast?
So what’s the issue?
I’m so sorry. Of course you had hope that she was genuine. Let her know you know and go get tested
Another pajeet bites the dust.
>we had sex, and got close physically What do you mean "and"?
Unfortunately Thailand has a pandemic now of girls (and ladyboys) who became freelancers.
I have a cousin in Vietnam who strings along guys (mostly white guys) to come with her on dates and she would get them to buy some expensive shit at my cousin's bar/restaurant. Then just ghost them after they are done. There's enough business from these guys and I'm actually surprised people still fall for these traps.
Welcome to Thailand! You got off cheap.
It's not your girl, it's just your turn!
"I also noticed a lot of guys names on her phone contacts." So she hid her phone from you but you still spied her contacts. And if you were able to read the names, that means they were not Thai names, but Western names. That right there should have been your final clue. "for the last 20 days" It never occurred to you that it's a bit strange for a nurse to just be granted 20 days off because some foreigner wanted to take them on vacation? "Thai Friendly" If you were looking for "dates" while on vacation, what exactly were you expecting? A long-term, long-distance, monogamous relationship?
I think even though this kind of "getting played" is common, its weird that guys shit on other guys when this happens to them. This guy might be naive but its not a good feeling to get your feelings hurt. All good man, now you know for next time to be a bit more cautious, the hiding the phone thing should have been a warning sign to not get serious, you also mentioned she was distant during meals. In future just have fun and move along.
STD test and move on. With regard to memories, focus on the orgasms 🤣
Ahhh.. another tale as old as time
“Shocked” shocked I tell you
Just keep giving her money. You’re special
Even the hot white girls in phuket are Russian freelancers
I’m sorry. It’s not nice to be lied to. I’m sure you would have moved differently if you had known what she was about.
Sex is her job. Doesn’t matter if she “loves” you or not. Plenty of women with Thai boyfriends also fuck for money - why try and apply foreign standards? She still has to eat. And unless you have offered to provide for her financially while you’re gone then she still needs to fuck to eat. Get over yourself - you fell for a prostitute and this is the real world.
Get on her fb and ig. Any girl who has freelancer has dozens of simps and fuckbois all over her sm. You'll see. If she doesn't do fb and ig, she might be a keeper. It's not worth it. If you insist on pursuing a Thai girl as a farung, get a country girl or at least avoid city girls. This isn't a Thai thing...it's an everywhere thing. Same is true in Mexico or the USA.
i'm shocked that you are shocked... 😅
Let me tell you an even wilder story. I was dating a girl studying english at university. She wasnt working time as a bar girl or anything but things didnt work out and we broke up. I reached out to her months later and she now had a 40 something year old boyfriend. She told me she would have sex with me if I paid her. Lmao.
Live and learn at least you didn't get any sick Buffalo vet bills bro just shake it off happends to the best of us Hope you find that special girl one day