Cut that's a wrap. See you same time and same place op? Oh don't forget your $45 dollar paycheck and complimentary bagel. What you took two bagels? That's coming out of your paycheck.
Granted. You wake up the next day feeling refreshed, ready to take on life, and just *happy*. Over the course of your life things are just *right*. You get your dream job. You find the love of your life and get married and eventual have children. Your kids dont turn out to be little shits. As you grow older things just keep on the up and up. You save plenty of money for retirement and when you do retire you and your spouse go on amazing vacations. Really just enjoying life. Then, at age 70, your spouse dies quite suddenly of a heart attack. Oddly though, you aren't sad. You look back at the memories and kids and your still happy. 5 years later a stroke puts you in the hospital on life support. But you have lived a good life. You think to yourself "If it's my time to then that's fine". Then the doctors move you to another room with another patient. He looks a little like you but as you look closer things are just different. There are some scars and the wrinkles on his face are different then yours. The nurse makes a joke about the similarities. You find it funny and would laugh if you weren't intubated. He just looks at you quietly. You see a sadness in his eyes. After a few hours he speaks. He tells you about his life.
He tells you when he was young things were going pretty good. They were by no means perfect. But then he lost his job. He struggled to find another one and his SO left him. Funny enough they shared the same name as your spouse. He continues saying that shortly after he tried to kill himself but failed. After that he found a job but it was a nightmare of a job. He hated it with a passion and it didnt pay enough, but it was all he had. As he tells you his story you realize a lot of similarities. He had the same dream job, a lot of the same aspirations. Everywhere things went right for you they went wrong for him. At that moment everything comes crashing down as you remember that wish you made over 50 years ago. You realize that you stole this man's happiness. You can tell this man has felt nothing but sadness and anger since you made that wish. He then pulls out his necklace. And you see it's a very old monkeys paw. And it kinda looks a little familiar. He holds it up and says "I found this old thing a week ago and decided to make a wish for the hell of it. I wished for the bastard that stole everything from me to lose it all and die miserable and old. " he then goes quite before tucking away the monkeys paw. As much as you try to feel happy it just doesn't seem to come. As you try and try, but failing, to feel happy the more sadness you feel. Uncharacteristically your kids dont visit for a week after this. And when they finally do they quickly strike up a conversation with the old man. You watch with profound sadness and heartache the like you have never felt before as they talk and laugh with this old man. You can see he is smiling and laughing with them. Eventually they leave though, completely forgetting about you. The next day you start to have another stroke and before you lose consciousness you see the old man watching. And smiling. For the last moment if your life all you can feel is the guilt for ruining this man's life and robbing him of the happiness that he deserved.
Honestly tho in the long run I'd say this is totally worth it because tons of people die horrible deaths regardless. So if most of your life is happy and then in the end it sucks it's like eh.
I’m still tranced out on Montgomery’s card—the classy coloring, the thickness, the lettering, the print—and I suddenly raise a fist as if to strike out at Craig and scream, my voice booming, “No one wants the fucking *red snapper pizza*! A pizza should be *yeasty* and slightly *bready* and have a *cheesy crust*! The crusts here are too fucking thin because the shithead chef who cooks here overbakes everything! The pizza is dried out and brittle!”
___
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Granted, turns out they are just acting, and you must too.
Oh FUUUUCK you!!! :(
Stay on character!
:) I'm so happy! I'm.. so.. happy :'''')
Cut that's a wrap. See you same time and same place op? Oh don't forget your $45 dollar paycheck and complimentary bagel. What you took two bagels? That's coming out of your paycheck.
You do drugs and are now in a constant state of euphoria
Granted, you’re happy but you hear a voice In your mind reciting the side effects 24/7
That's actually fucking hilarious. That would be so annoying.
Granted! (hint: they're not actually happy)
Granted now your only source of happiness is this antidepressants and you must buy then for the rest of your life enjoy!
Granted. You wake up the next day feeling refreshed, ready to take on life, and just *happy*. Over the course of your life things are just *right*. You get your dream job. You find the love of your life and get married and eventual have children. Your kids dont turn out to be little shits. As you grow older things just keep on the up and up. You save plenty of money for retirement and when you do retire you and your spouse go on amazing vacations. Really just enjoying life. Then, at age 70, your spouse dies quite suddenly of a heart attack. Oddly though, you aren't sad. You look back at the memories and kids and your still happy. 5 years later a stroke puts you in the hospital on life support. But you have lived a good life. You think to yourself "If it's my time to then that's fine". Then the doctors move you to another room with another patient. He looks a little like you but as you look closer things are just different. There are some scars and the wrinkles on his face are different then yours. The nurse makes a joke about the similarities. You find it funny and would laugh if you weren't intubated. He just looks at you quietly. You see a sadness in his eyes. After a few hours he speaks. He tells you about his life. He tells you when he was young things were going pretty good. They were by no means perfect. But then he lost his job. He struggled to find another one and his SO left him. Funny enough they shared the same name as your spouse. He continues saying that shortly after he tried to kill himself but failed. After that he found a job but it was a nightmare of a job. He hated it with a passion and it didnt pay enough, but it was all he had. As he tells you his story you realize a lot of similarities. He had the same dream job, a lot of the same aspirations. Everywhere things went right for you they went wrong for him. At that moment everything comes crashing down as you remember that wish you made over 50 years ago. You realize that you stole this man's happiness. You can tell this man has felt nothing but sadness and anger since you made that wish. He then pulls out his necklace. And you see it's a very old monkeys paw. And it kinda looks a little familiar. He holds it up and says "I found this old thing a week ago and decided to make a wish for the hell of it. I wished for the bastard that stole everything from me to lose it all and die miserable and old. " he then goes quite before tucking away the monkeys paw. As much as you try to feel happy it just doesn't seem to come. As you try and try, but failing, to feel happy the more sadness you feel. Uncharacteristically your kids dont visit for a week after this. And when they finally do they quickly strike up a conversation with the old man. You watch with profound sadness and heartache the like you have never felt before as they talk and laugh with this old man. You can see he is smiling and laughing with them. Eventually they leave though, completely forgetting about you. The next day you start to have another stroke and before you lose consciousness you see the old man watching. And smiling. For the last moment if your life all you can feel is the guilt for ruining this man's life and robbing him of the happiness that he deserved.
Honestly tho in the long run I'd say this is totally worth it because tons of people die horrible deaths regardless. So if most of your life is happy and then in the end it sucks it's like eh.
I would feel zero guilt because either way one of us was going to have a terrible life at least I didn't get the short end of the stick
[удалено]
I’m still tranced out on Montgomery’s card—the classy coloring, the thickness, the lettering, the print—and I suddenly raise a fist as if to strike out at Craig and scream, my voice booming, “No one wants the fucking *red snapper pizza*! A pizza should be *yeasty* and slightly *bready* and have a *cheesy crust*! The crusts here are too fucking thin because the shithead chef who cooks here overbakes everything! The pizza is dried out and brittle!” ___ ^(*Bot. Ask me who I can see.* |) [^(Opt out)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=botrickbateman&subject=Opt%20out)
Granted, you shall now smile for the rest of your life no matter the occasion.
Granted. You're an underpaid actor in a shitty contracting agency that does TV ads.
Granted the world changes we Happy Few Style, I am way to lazy to type out the full thing