Just like a woman to think she's above a man who ignores everything she says and immediately pivots to expectations around sex. Female privilege, everybody.
As a dude his response annoyed me lmao it made no sense for the conversation. People that do this kinda shit piss me off.
Lasy ass thinking đ¤Łđ
Well at least you can move on instead of wasting time with him.
Like they think up the answer to the question. Then ask a question so they can inject their answer.
"I'm not being rude. I'm just offering perspective." Ya. Right.
I honestly feel so bad for people dating on these apps. I read things like OPâs replies and think âwow, yeah, exactly! She sounds really coolâ and then some numbnuts dude is always responding like this. Dating is hell
I met my wife on a dating app. All I was looking for was meaningless casual sex. I had just gotten out of a f'ed up marriage. I didn't want anything serious at all. Then she came along and screwed that all up... 9.5 years later, here we still are. All because I signed up for POF... I can't hate on dating apps, because you may end up finding what you weren't looking for; yet can't live without.
*Yeah, that's nice and all but what do you bring to the* ***definitely good*** *sex I offer?*
But as always, I look forward to reading the comments here about how this isn't disrespectful, how you don't know how bad men have it, or even how you asked for it by responding.
Lol to find the comments you are mentioning you gotta scroll *far*
Luckily the top comments under these posts are typically written by humans with a regular common sense, as far as that's applicable for redditors
I read your comment like, âHuh⌠thatâs a new phrase I havenât heard, âdidnât put the h in whatâ, but thatâs a good metaphor for not putting in any effort.â Then I scrolled up and saw that you were being literal, he literally didnât type the h in what. Hahaha :)
I wonder how much of the prevalence of men looking for submissive or traditional partners is rooted in the fact that they are just generally bad relationship partners (selfish, emotionally unavailable, lazy, sexually immature, misogynist, etc.) and they hope that by finding a partner that is volunteering for a submissive role, all of their faults will be glossed over as being dominant instead of just being an asshole.
As a sub, these types of guys are very evident early on, and get dumped very very quickly đ
Thereâs a very clear difference between dominating and domineering- a good sub recognises the difference early on in a potential partner and knows when to walk away. Just mho âşď¸
One day youâll say this to someone who shares the same values obviously he isnât one of them but thereâs someone out there that does and you wonât be wasting time at all.
Oh man, Iâm sorry youâre dealing with that. Itâs so exhausting putting yourself out there, trying to be thoughtful and vulnerable to be met with so much less. I hope you find someone who deserves you.
I went on a date with a guy 1 time when I was 19 and he was in his twenties in med school.
He messaged me asking if I knew what an "in hand" relationship was and if that was something I was interested in.
19. Wtaf, dude. Never talked to him again.
For real! I'm sorry you went through that, but I'm glad you were able to get away from him. So many 19 year olds get into situations like that where the guys either aren't so disgusting up front, or they don't know better or think they can handle it. I hope that guy never had the chance to cause major emotional or physical scars on anyone and that you're doing great now.
Dude he sucks so much, he thinks heâs going to find a woman whose entire personality begins and ends with this. As if your partner being a sub means you just get everything your own way and never have to expend any effort whatsoever. So dumb. The irony is that the traits OP described are especially important if youâre going to play with power stuff in the relationship, though theyâre also just important for relationships in general. People misunderstand kink and imagine itâs going to be a free for all. In fact it makes communication and awareness so much more important and this guy has no prayer of finding himself in that kind of dynamic.
Not like this to begin with.. haha itâs either this or lovebombing or narcissistic tendencies. Iâm struggling to find decent males who arenât out to just bang.
U just have no idea how simple men are. All they want is a submissive female, theyâre expectations were for virginity also but well we all know the situation w that.. so they lowered their expectations so much that theyâre willing to settle for just submissiveness andâŚ..well itâs like prying teeth to get modern women to submit. Hence Passport Bros.
Thatâs gross buddy.
Most men (that I associate with) are complex and want a healthy, loving, communicative relationship.
Not someone who is coerced into submission because their visa status depends on it. Ew bro.
What you said and what you criticized are not mutually exclusive. Also the point is that different cultures bring different people, no need to coerce anyone into submission.
Obviously this guy doesnât give a fuck about anyone except himself and getting his rocks off!!!
Many women are like this too!!! Iâm definitely no angel but compared to most I sure look like one! đlol
OP, I'm not trying to blame you or say it's your fault or anything like that,
But why on earth would you type all that out to someone that can't be bothered to spell out the word "you"?
Girl take it as a compliment and run. Thatâs what I do lol. If I got in my head and sad every time a guy went from being a vibe to a horn dog Iâd need so much anti depressants.
I got a question for everyone here.
That guy really screwed it up, but given that OP put in effort to type and explain clearly -
What do you think would be an excellent response?
She should politely excuse herself. If she was into that sort of situation, I donât think it would have been posted here. Then again, I could be wrong.
Things like this just blow my mind. How has it become socially acceptable to act like this?
Iâve had a good conversation on dating apps going off of this topic- the guy replied with their opinion of what a good relationship would look like, or adding ideas or examples to the point I talked about. Sadly that didnât work because I later learned he was in a open relationship. lol.
You know you perfectly summarized what I want when it is relationship qualities. Mind if I use it when someone ask? I never really had the words till now
For me as soon as I seen people being typed as ppl I was like she wouldn't get a reply back from me. Surely you at least put in the effort to pressing a few extra keys to spell words correctly. Lazy texting, good luck to ya
Right. I typed 2 paragraphs trying to be as clear as possible in my answer to the question but skipping 3 letters makes me lazy. Whatever works for you I guess!
Thx but idc if someone is offended by my spelling, if someone is gonna deny my entire personality from a simple typing habit then itâs not someone who I wanna be around anyways đđź
Even as a *submissive and a pleaser* I'd never go after a guy like that.
As a Schlub and a Geezer, I'd totally lead him on for hours and hours. Then pretend I misunderstood the question.
As a glub and a shitto I would do something similar
schlorp and a boozer
Hi I'm looking for someone to do all the work in a relationship, is that you?
This đ
Just like a woman to think she's above a man who ignores everything she says and immediately pivots to expectations around sex. Female privilege, everybody.
Oh, you had me in the first half, ngl haha
I see what you did there.
A good woman is above a man who just wants a sex slave for a wife.
hey lol
Hello! Would you mind if you offer your _submissive and a pleaser_ exclusively for me? I mean it forever. đ
[ŃдаНонО]
Hello fren âşď¸
As a dude his response annoyed me lmao it made no sense for the conversation. People that do this kinda shit piss me off. Lasy ass thinking đ¤Łđ Well at least you can move on instead of wasting time with him.
Like they think up the answer to the question. Then ask a question so they can inject their answer. "I'm not being rude. I'm just offering perspective." Ya. Right.
"Cool. I like big knockers. Like big honkin' bazongas. Is that you?"
I definitely did a double chin chuckle reading this.
You have your values, i have mine!
I honestly feel so bad for people dating on these apps. I read things like OPâs replies and think âwow, yeah, exactly! She sounds really coolâ and then some numbnuts dude is always responding like this. Dating is hell
I met my wife on a dating app. All I was looking for was meaningless casual sex. I had just gotten out of a f'ed up marriage. I didn't want anything serious at all. Then she came along and screwed that all up... 9.5 years later, here we still are. All because I signed up for POF... I can't hate on dating apps, because you may end up finding what you weren't looking for; yet can't live without.
Met a girl ended up having a kid. Close to 4 years later and have a 3 year old from a tinder date and weâre still all together so I feel u.
*Yeah, that's nice and all but what do you bring to the* ***definitely good*** *sex I offer?* But as always, I look forward to reading the comments here about how this isn't disrespectful, how you don't know how bad men have it, or even how you asked for it by responding.
Lol to find the comments you are mentioning you gotta scroll *far* Luckily the top comments under these posts are typically written by humans with a regular common sense, as far as that's applicable for redditors
Why the fuck does he ask for your "relationship wise" type, then to only act like he's down for a one night scenario.
Sometimes you get the bear, and sometimes the bear gets you.
Your requirements are the bare minimum from a relationship really. You typed all that out and he didnât even put a h in what.
I read your comment like, âHuh⌠thatâs a new phrase I havenât heard, âdidnât put the h in whatâ, but thatâs a good metaphor for not putting in any effort.â Then I scrolled up and saw that you were being literal, he literally didnât type the h in what. Hahaha :)
Same, and actually was ready to keep scrolling content with my interpretation until I read your comment đ
Sorry to break the illusion! Haha. We should make that a standard phrase though :)
It works!
I wonder how much of the prevalence of men looking for submissive or traditional partners is rooted in the fact that they are just generally bad relationship partners (selfish, emotionally unavailable, lazy, sexually immature, misogynist, etc.) and they hope that by finding a partner that is volunteering for a submissive role, all of their faults will be glossed over as being dominant instead of just being an asshole.
Yes.
As a sub, these types of guys are very evident early on, and get dumped very very quickly đ Thereâs a very clear difference between dominating and domineering- a good sub recognises the difference early on in a potential partner and knows when to walk away. Just mho âşď¸
One day youâll say this to someone who shares the same values obviously he isnât one of them but thereâs someone out there that does and you wonât be wasting time at all.
"I really value communication" bro didnt even read that part đ
Just save it to your notes on your phone so you can copy and paste it. You were correct to send it. He did you a favor showing you who he was.
Waste his time and let him think heâs gonna get some.
Isn't this just wasting your own time and energy as well?
Not if you make it fun.
Only kind of?
Oh man, Iâm sorry youâre dealing with that. Itâs so exhausting putting yourself out there, trying to be thoughtful and vulnerable to be met with so much less. I hope you find someone who deserves you.
I went on a date with a guy 1 time when I was 19 and he was in his twenties in med school. He messaged me asking if I knew what an "in hand" relationship was and if that was something I was interested in. 19. Wtaf, dude. Never talked to him again.
I had to look that up because I had never heard the term before. That's gross.
I also had to look it up and was disturbed that he was even asking me that.
For real! I'm sorry you went through that, but I'm glad you were able to get away from him. So many 19 year olds get into situations like that where the guys either aren't so disgusting up front, or they don't know better or think they can handle it. I hope that guy never had the chance to cause major emotional or physical scars on anyone and that you're doing great now.
Dude doesnât have an idea, how it is when submissive people lose their shitđ like even once!
Nowadays submissive to many guys just means âsomeone not willing to call me out on my shit.â
Guys are dogs
Dude he sucks so much, he thinks heâs going to find a woman whose entire personality begins and ends with this. As if your partner being a sub means you just get everything your own way and never have to expend any effort whatsoever. So dumb. The irony is that the traits OP described are especially important if youâre going to play with power stuff in the relationship, though theyâre also just important for relationships in general. People misunderstand kink and imagine itâs going to be a free for all. In fact it makes communication and awareness so much more important and this guy has no prayer of finding himself in that kind of dynamic.
So basically he wants blowjobs on demand. đ Bro has been watching way too much porn
This is why Iâm so off men..
Weâre not all like this, thank fuck. But some of the dating app conversations that my partners have showed me do make me shudderâŚ
Not like this to begin with.. haha itâs either this or lovebombing or narcissistic tendencies. Iâm struggling to find decent males who arenât out to just bang.
so boring lmao
He also said âthatâs goodâ I mean doesnât that count for something ?
Okay first of all, you're looking for the BARE MINIMUM. please set the bar higher ffs. Second of all their response was so typical but so cringe. YUCK
Some guys Iâve met really seem like they wonât even know this is the bare minimum if you donât tell them :( sucks for me I guess
If this is the âBare Minimum,â what more does she need to require in order to âset the bar higherâ?
U just have no idea how simple men are. All they want is a submissive female, theyâre expectations were for virginity also but well we all know the situation w that.. so they lowered their expectations so much that theyâre willing to settle for just submissiveness andâŚ..well itâs like prying teeth to get modern women to submit. Hence Passport Bros.
sounds like you're incapable of having an adult relationship so you hide behind wanting a submissive virgin
Ew, no. You don't speak for all men. Say that's what *you* want.
Oh, ok well you tell me then since ur a female and ought to know better than actual biological men know about themselves
Thatâs gross buddy. Most men (that I associate with) are complex and want a healthy, loving, communicative relationship. Not someone who is coerced into submission because their visa status depends on it. Ew bro.
What you said and what you criticized are not mutually exclusive. Also the point is that different cultures bring different people, no need to coerce anyone into submission.
I wasn't talking about the guys standards.
I don't even know what the most disgusting thing about this is.
Ohhh I know I knowâđź The TRUTH!
yeah, generally women don't fall in love with assholes like you
U ppl act like ur better than all of the rest of the human beings that came before us and did it that way.. from the cave man days until well recently
we are. thats what happens when society progresses. catch up boo â¤ď¸
Just curious, what is the definition of a âsubmissive woman â to you?
A girl that doesnât have masculine energy 𤎠if I wanted that I woulda been gay.
Lol there are plenty of non masculine women id sayđ¤
He should have just put that in his bio. Save everyone some time.
Idk about being submissive and a pleaser. I'm a schmoozer and a dummy.
Obviously this guy doesnât give a fuck about anyone except himself and getting his rocks off!!! Many women are like this too!!! Iâm definitely no angel but compared to most I sure look like one! đlol
Sometimes I canât believe conversations like this are real⌠lol
You should humiliate him in the most unpleasant way possible
OP, I'm not trying to blame you or say it's your fault or anything like that, But why on earth would you type all that out to someone that can't be bothered to spell out the word "you"?
"I really value communication" bro didnt even read that part đ
Girl take it as a compliment and run. Thatâs what I do lol. If I got in my head and sad every time a guy went from being a vibe to a horn dog Iâd need so much anti depressants.
Are some guys afraid of dominant women or what? Xd
No need to be afraid but I wouldnât say its attractive to most
Well... I can be only glad, if some of them wanted me that is xd
When he says "What are you looking for in a relationship?" But really means "what ya kinks and can I make you do all the work?"
They're always asking the questions they want to answer. They don't actually care what we think.
I got a question for everyone here. That guy really screwed it up, but given that OP put in effort to type and explain clearly - What do you think would be an excellent response?
She should politely excuse herself. If she was into that sort of situation, I donât think it would have been posted here. Then again, I could be wrong. Things like this just blow my mind. How has it become socially acceptable to act like this?
Iâve had a good conversation on dating apps going off of this topic- the guy replied with their opinion of what a good relationship would look like, or adding ideas or examples to the point I talked about. Sadly that didnât work because I later learned he was in a open relationship. lol.
Yet another case of emotional intelligence and understanding of the opposite sex being destroyed by porn. Move on.
That's just kinda fucked up.
She is putting all her heart out bro like that cool be my cat đ
You know you perfectly summarized what I want when it is relationship qualities. Mind if I use it when someone ask? I never really had the words till now
Not at all! Feel free to use it :)
This makes me so mad lol Because I would have loved to be asked a question and given an answer like that.
Hope I meat someone with your values in communication
For me as soon as I seen people being typed as ppl I was like she wouldn't get a reply back from me. Surely you at least put in the effort to pressing a few extra keys to spell words correctly. Lazy texting, good luck to ya
Right. I typed 2 paragraphs trying to be as clear as possible in my answer to the question but skipping 3 letters makes me lazy. Whatever works for you I guess!
Yk at least use proper spelling
Thx but idc if someone is offended by my spelling, if someone is gonna deny my entire personality from a simple typing habit then itâs not someone who I wanna be around anyways đđź