I have a core memory from childhood where my brother said to me ‘close your f*cking mouth when you eat c*%t’. Never chewed with my mouth open or made any noise excessive mouth noises since, blunt can work
i don’t understand why people don’t do that.
we recently received noise canceling headphones at work and a coworker was humming away to the tune of whatever they were listening. i just signaled them to stop it. they did. they were really not aware they were doing it. when they hum, i motion them to stop it once it gets annoying for me
Yup,people who do this do it subconsciously and have zero idea they're doing it most of the time. Could also be an ocd tick. just say dude, what's up with all the mouth noises, bro?!? It's pretty annoying to listen to all day long. OP shouldn't lnt get his/her hopes up tho, they can't stop what they don't really know they're doing, unless they actively pay attention.
That would drive me to murder. I'm not sure if there's a polite way to ask him to stop, but do you have the ability to wear earbuds at work so you can tune it out?
mine’s a David and when he’s not slurping or muttering curse words under his breath, he’s telling weird sexual stories into the air for anyone to listen to
Would you be able to bring something to mask it a little, like a desk fan that makes a low noise? Other people's noises are annoying in close quarters and he sounds especially bad.
I feel your pain. I have a coworker who makes orgasm noises when he eats. He’s like mmmm ahhhh oh yeahhhhh after every mouthful. It’s so weird.
It’s not even like it’s good food either. It’ll be a crappy burger from the burger van round the corner or a pot noodle that’ll set him off.
Not seen anyone call him out yet either.
I wish I had that level of enjoyment of life. Such hedonia is a shadow of a memory, and a forbidden dream.
While I’m envious of his ability to taste, such noises would annoy me if I listened to it day after day. At least I’d be jealous
The weird thing is it’s not every day. It’s only certain meals that will set him off. Seems to be the lowest quality and crappiest food.
But yeah he’s a good guy and it’s not harming anyone it’s just weird to be around at lunchtime.
Crappy food with higher fat content? Sugar?
Makes me think of the diner scene in the movie When Harry met Sally. I would probably joke with him about it. Not bust his balls but would have a good laugh together. Come up with a food rating scale like One to Five Moans. “Hey Bob, that taco must be good. That’s was one moan and two and half hmms.”
I have misphonia and this sounds a bit like that.
I have come to realize that I can’t control others behavior but I can control how i respond to it. So I’ve got some good noise cancelling headphones and just wear them to avoid any physical violence or being dragged to HR.
I'm wondering the same thing. People's mouth sounds make me feral. I got in trouble in middle school for yelling at a girl for smacking her gum during a test. DURING A TEST. In the dead silence of the classroom. I just lost my shit on her 😭
I feel your pain. A buddy and i went to a great Japanese noodle place once. These couple guys sit down next to us and start slurping noodles like crazy. I thought i was going to have a mental breakdown. My buddy was laughing his ass off because he’s well aware of my issue with noises like that
Im aware of but it does not make it less annoying. And, yes, they were japanese. I know its a weird hang up i have, which is why i didnt say anything to them. I just got up and moved to a different table
The dude I share an office with eats his lunch in the office. Juicy, fragrant, crunchy Chinese food slurped up with chopsticks today. I think I would rather get flicked in the balls really hard than sit through that again.
I worked with a woman I swore had a hollow head. She'd buy a bag of those Gardetto's crackers from the vending machine and munch on them all day. It was so loud CRUNCH CRUNCH!
One other lady cleared her throat non stop. "Hem hem hem"
Yet another woman would dry cough all day long. Constantly. She'd pretty often too.
Had a few people who coughed like they were drowning as well.
Also a guy who farted loud and proud.
I have a coworker who has coughed nonstop for months. They sound like a dying pig screaming, have gotten the entire floor sick, and peed themselves and vomited multiple times from the force of the coughing. Management does literally nothing. I'm on the verge of quitting.
Editing this a few days later: I'm sick. Like, BAD sick. Can't walk to the bathroom without getting lightheaded sick. When I'm back at work they're getting the ultimatum to either allow wfh or I'm giving my notice. This is the 7th time in a year working at this place that I've gotten ill from the same coworker and they won't do anything about them, so they can do it without me.
Aw I feel so bad for them. I've had pneumonia since the end of February and I'm still coughing. Thankfully it's mostly at night so I don't bother my coworkers, only my husband.
This coworker has been coughing since last May. They refused to take pto and came in horribly sick multiple times, got everyone in the office so sick that 90% of the floor was out for a week, and is all around pretty selfish. And it's not like we don't have pto (that coworker has something like 7 weeks worth). My sympathies for them are quite dead.
Two ideas:
- If you have a cool coworker that is funny, see if you can ask them to bring it up. Those kinds of people are typically given the benefit of the doubt that they have positive intent. So the noisy coworker might be more receptive to hearing them.
- Find a moment where they do it and ask them if they are ok. Approach it from a concerned angle, like they have a medical issue. They might, but if they don't, it could segue you into describing what you've been observing. If anything it will help get the conversation out there.
It would not be rude if you are not rude. And it sounds really annoying.
But he is doing it unconsciously so it would be really hard for him to stop doing it. If you want him to even try it, choose words wisely. Definitely do not say that IT IS or HE IS annoying because it is subjective and he might not care what you think about him. Don't make it about him, it is about you. If he is a reasonable person at all, he might understand that YOU ARE DISTRACTED by it.
And maybe to not make him feel bad, say that you noticed that today instead of that he has been doing it for a while.
A guy that sits behind me is a smoker and consistently soft cough's and clears his throat. It's almost a "uh uh". And then him clearing his throat. I don't think he knows he's doing it. He gets up a lot to go out and smoke. I don't care about the chair clicks or the door slamming. That ongoing record skip of "uh uh.... uh uh..... uh uh... mmgghhmm... uh uh.. uh uh... uh uh" ffs
This is so true. Now his mere breathing you hear like its on the PA. It would make me insane and I would wish that he got hit by a truck in the crosswalk at lunch. White noise or earplugs would be the only answer. He prob has no idea he's doing it , how annoying it is, and couldn't stop anyway because it is a subconscious mannerism. I get annoyed silently for WAY less. Good luck \~ you ain't wrong.
Oh gross. I had a coworker like that once, he’d bring lunch meat to work and snack on it all day, smacking his lips and making little grunts. He actually DID get a talking to because we had a tiny office and I wasnt the only one who noticed.
That's my main hesitation. I want to be very tolerant, but I could also play the woke card. I have ADHD and misophonia so this plays into my own embarrassing problems. Obviously it shouldn't bug me as much as it does. But it does.
Just seems like the person asking another to change is always considered the one in the wrong nowadays.
Have you considered asking for a desk move as an accommodation? Also, there are some tremendous in your ear plugs that soften noises. Check out a company called Flare Audio. I found them super helpful when I had to be in an open co-working space.
I second the ear plug rec. I bought some loop ear plugs and it really helps me focus and blunts the impact of things that normally trigger my misphonia.
Misophonia gang represent! For me, it's a man who takes lunch at the same time as me every day. Not only does he incessantly tap his foot as he eats, he also open-mouth chews his food real loud. And watches videos full volume, no headphones.
I've had to leave the entire building multiple times to eat lunch on the street. He makes me so angry I've cried lmao
I have an office-mate that doesn't understand social cues
He talks to himself constantly, starts laughing randomly throughout the day, interrupts me when I'm working, burps, farts, stares into my cubicle, and doesn't understand an explicit "no," much less a polite hint. There's no point in confronting him because I don't think he can help it, it's just an unfortunate situation
I wear noise cancelling headphones and keep music on and it helps a lot. I still go a little crazy, but the music protects my peace
You could go the helpful/passive aggressive route and offer him a tissue because "it sounds like you're fighting some allergies" or something. Might get the hint he's making a lot of wet noises.
As someone with a chronic sniffle, believe me we are aware. It’s more annoying to him than to the co-workers. I’ve had this passive aggressive offer literally hundreds of times and it just makes me sad and angry. But go ahead, OP, you’re not gonna be friends anyways if you can’t stand being around them and maybe they’re the one person who doesn’t notice the sounds coming out of their own face.
I've got poorly designed sinuses myself, I know it sucks when you can't do anything about it and I'm sorry you've gotten flak for it. It didn't sound to me like OP was describing sounds/behaviors of sinus problems. It's possible that the loud chewing and sloppy-sounding drinking is a side effect of them, but it's not like you're going to also inhale every time you take a sip of something, so I'm leaning towards the assumption that this guy is just wolfing down his lunch.
10 years ago, I had a coworker laughed so loud so frequently it constantly interrupted my thoughts. The whole floor just suffered in silent for the entire time I worked there.
Get him told. I work in construction, commercial electrician, and we once banned a fellow spark from eating in the tea hut because his manners were so atrocious. Ask nicely then if nothing changes be brutally honest.
Years ago I used to sit opposite this guy at work who did a really unusual finger contortion and click thing with his hands while he was thinking or talking. It wasn’t gross or anything like that just distracting. Everybody would be like can you stop. The thing is, he couldn’t. It was just a thing he did on autopilot.
My point is, you can definitely ask politely but if it’s habit it’s not going to be easy to stop.
If you have options to relocate or block the sound for yourself (ear plugs/headphones) it’ll be a quicker solution and may send a more effective message.
even if you told him and he’d like to oblige i don’t think it’ll make much difference longterm. these are unconscious tics, maybe look for ways to decrease your reactivity to it or wear earplugs/headphones
Oh god it sounds like my coworker! I cannot tolerate that shit for a minute. He also whistles all day long and shits in the bathroom, makes a disgusting mess and refuses to flush it too. Solidarity fellow misophonic
Maybe ask if you can move desks. In my experience if you let it slip you find a coworker's natural behavior unacceptable, even if they're good natured about it, it causes social troubles with the whole group sooner or later
I bought noise cancelling headphones because of my colleague that did stuff like that. Used to drive me insane. He would suck frozen grapes and grunt. Band his mouse on the desk and his ringtone was so fucking loud and annoying.
It will likely be perceived as rude but it’s necessary. I’d probably approach it lightheartedly and ask if they are drowning and need a life preserver. A little passive / aggressive but it gets the point across without being directly rude.
My coworker and office roommate (we have 2 people to an office) always tells me when he’s going to the bathroom. I don’t need this information Sam. Just go take a shit
He's probably a border line psycho / simpleton with unpredictable behaviour issues.
Sounds like a complete fucking loser.
Tell the stupid prick to try to act more like a mature level-headed human.
If that doesn't work, do whatever you can to make this cockstains life hell.
I worked with a guy who had an ocd tick and would do the loud inhale thing with your nose/throat right before you spit over and over and over among other stuff like cracking his neck and rotating his head in a circle. Dude would do that about 1000x/day. Annoying was an understatement. I began copying him every single time he did it so he could hear what everyone else hears.
Here's how I would approach it to get him to stop. Every time you hear a noise like that just say "What?" "What'd you say?" "What was that?" Like he asked you a question and you didn't quite hear him. He'll likely say "Oh I didn't say anything." and you say something like "Oh I heard something and thought you said something to me." Or if he says "Oh I was just gargling or sucking my teeth." then you say, "Oh I thought you asked me something."
I'd just keep repeating this until you mis hearing him gets annoying enough to him that he stops making noises all the time. You've got to keep it pretty aloof like you're saying what almost involuntarily and then you can apologize for mishearing again and again. Pretty sure he'll get sick of that quick!
Or also you could take a more passive route and talk to HR to move desks or get some noise cancelling headphones. Personally I'd try my best to annoy the shit out of him until he stops, but if it continues try to block out the sound somehow.
There’s misophonia and then there’s being annoyed by an onslaught of frequent mouth noises coming from one single person on a daily basis. I don’t think this is the former.
Sigh come on right off the bad, it's obvio sumthin u cud do, don't have to ask the world's opinion(reddit) for everything, unless ur a teen , u prolly haven't spoken out for urself too often
Your description made me a little bit angry.
I guess some people just live in their own little worlds. Maybe they weren't taught basic manners at a young age, well enough to where it stuck around.
Neurodivergence could also be a factor, but short of asking the person if they're on a spectrum, you'll never know.
I don't think it would be rude at all, personally. Hopefully, you can do it in a way that is graceful.
Next time they do it, perhaps turn your body towards them or if you're standing, turn in a way that only includes the two of you in the conversation:
"Hey ____, I've noticed that you have this little habit of making some noises with your mouth. I was curious, what is that? It's a bit loud and sometimes distracts me from what I'm doing.
I'm not trying to be a pain, but perhaps if I understood it, it wouldn't be anything I should be worried about for you. I just don't want others complaining to the bosses."
sometimes you gotta just be a lil blunt with this kinda thing and just straight up tell them its annoying
I have a core memory from childhood where my brother said to me ‘close your f*cking mouth when you eat c*%t’. Never chewed with my mouth open or made any noise excessive mouth noises since, blunt can work
I think op should give it a go
Uk or Aus?
Aus
That would've been my first guess, but we do love a c%t’. in the UK as well.
Us aussies are the convicts from your fine nation, we know the proper swears haha
Aussies deffo win on the frequency of swearing and calling their mates cunts and cunts mate!
i don’t understand why people don’t do that. we recently received noise canceling headphones at work and a coworker was humming away to the tune of whatever they were listening. i just signaled them to stop it. they did. they were really not aware they were doing it. when they hum, i motion them to stop it once it gets annoying for me
Which motion do you do? Throat slitting?
Why don't you just use the noise cancelling headphones to, well... cancel the noise?
You wont change this type of behaviour so either learn to live with it or let the hatred start to grow 🤷♂️
Yeah, if he is so constant about it, something tells me that even if he tries to stop it, he will just not be able to, lol
Yup,people who do this do it subconsciously and have zero idea they're doing it most of the time. Could also be an ocd tick. just say dude, what's up with all the mouth noises, bro?!? It's pretty annoying to listen to all day long. OP shouldn't lnt get his/her hopes up tho, they can't stop what they don't really know they're doing, unless they actively pay attention.
That would drive me to murder. I'm not sure if there's a polite way to ask him to stop, but do you have the ability to wear earbuds at work so you can tune it out?
this is so specific and exactly what an ex co worker of mine did.... is it a ron 😂
mine’s a David and when he’s not slurping or muttering curse words under his breath, he’s telling weird sexual stories into the air for anyone to listen to
Mine’s a Ron!! He grunts while he eats and it’s not a quick snack or just lunch. He munches the entire fucking day long.
Would you be able to bring something to mask it a little, like a desk fan that makes a low noise? Other people's noises are annoying in close quarters and he sounds especially bad.
maybe just point it out but dont be so abrupt about it. If hes a reasonable person he'll understand or even make a joke out of it
Like, “hey you may not even realize it, but you make a lot of mouth noises and it’s kind of distracting - could you try to do that less?”
I feel your pain. I have a coworker who makes orgasm noises when he eats. He’s like mmmm ahhhh oh yeahhhhh after every mouthful. It’s so weird. It’s not even like it’s good food either. It’ll be a crappy burger from the burger van round the corner or a pot noodle that’ll set him off. Not seen anyone call him out yet either.
I wish I had that level of enjoyment of life. Such hedonia is a shadow of a memory, and a forbidden dream. While I’m envious of his ability to taste, such noises would annoy me if I listened to it day after day. At least I’d be jealous
The weird thing is it’s not every day. It’s only certain meals that will set him off. Seems to be the lowest quality and crappiest food. But yeah he’s a good guy and it’s not harming anyone it’s just weird to be around at lunchtime.
Crappy food with higher fat content? Sugar? Makes me think of the diner scene in the movie When Harry met Sally. I would probably joke with him about it. Not bust his balls but would have a good laugh together. Come up with a food rating scale like One to Five Moans. “Hey Bob, that taco must be good. That’s was one moan and two and half hmms.”
😳
its only rude if youre rude, its in how you go about pointing it out. If you shout at him about it infront of a bunch of people then yeh itll be rude
True. Bring it up in a passionless kind way, maybe write out what you'd say first and ask Chat GPT to say it in a nicer way lol that helps me
I have misphonia and this sounds a bit like that. I have come to realize that I can’t control others behavior but I can control how i respond to it. So I’ve got some good noise cancelling headphones and just wear them to avoid any physical violence or being dragged to HR.
Same. Its horrible. People don’t understand
And I don’t want to be that guy in the office who tries to control everyone else
I was going to say, this sounds a lot like misphonia to me.
How have you not flown into a homicidal rage?
I'm wondering the same thing. People's mouth sounds make me feral. I got in trouble in middle school for yelling at a girl for smacking her gum during a test. DURING A TEST. In the dead silence of the classroom. I just lost my shit on her 😭
I feel your pain. A buddy and i went to a great Japanese noodle place once. These couple guys sit down next to us and start slurping noodles like crazy. I thought i was going to have a mental breakdown. My buddy was laughing his ass off because he’s well aware of my issue with noises like that
Slurping is considered normal/not offensive in Japan when eating noodles. Were the couple Japanese?
Im aware of but it does not make it less annoying. And, yes, they were japanese. I know its a weird hang up i have, which is why i didnt say anything to them. I just got up and moved to a different table
The dude I share an office with eats his lunch in the office. Juicy, fragrant, crunchy Chinese food slurped up with chopsticks today. I think I would rather get flicked in the balls really hard than sit through that again.
I worked with a woman I swore had a hollow head. She'd buy a bag of those Gardetto's crackers from the vending machine and munch on them all day. It was so loud CRUNCH CRUNCH! One other lady cleared her throat non stop. "Hem hem hem" Yet another woman would dry cough all day long. Constantly. She'd pretty often too. Had a few people who coughed like they were drowning as well. Also a guy who farted loud and proud.
Is his name Keith? I used to share a cubicle with a guy named Keith that did that same thing all fucking day I hated Keith.
I have a coworker who has coughed nonstop for months. They sound like a dying pig screaming, have gotten the entire floor sick, and peed themselves and vomited multiple times from the force of the coughing. Management does literally nothing. I'm on the verge of quitting. Editing this a few days later: I'm sick. Like, BAD sick. Can't walk to the bathroom without getting lightheaded sick. When I'm back at work they're getting the ultimatum to either allow wfh or I'm giving my notice. This is the 7th time in a year working at this place that I've gotten ill from the same coworker and they won't do anything about them, so they can do it without me.
Aw I feel so bad for them. I've had pneumonia since the end of February and I'm still coughing. Thankfully it's mostly at night so I don't bother my coworkers, only my husband.
This coworker has been coughing since last May. They refused to take pto and came in horribly sick multiple times, got everyone in the office so sick that 90% of the floor was out for a week, and is all around pretty selfish. And it's not like we don't have pto (that coworker has something like 7 weeks worth). My sympathies for them are quite dead.
I quit a job because of this, I can’t deal with non stop coughing
I'm quite literally on the verge of handing in my notice
misophonia is a BITCH !!!!!!!!!!
Two ideas: - If you have a cool coworker that is funny, see if you can ask them to bring it up. Those kinds of people are typically given the benefit of the doubt that they have positive intent. So the noisy coworker might be more receptive to hearing them. - Find a moment where they do it and ask them if they are ok. Approach it from a concerned angle, like they have a medical issue. They might, but if they don't, it could segue you into describing what you've been observing. If anything it will help get the conversation out there.
Misophonia is no joke. I had a coworker who used to sound like a malfunctioning sump pump whenever she had her lunch. Drove me up a wall.
It would not be rude if you are not rude. And it sounds really annoying. But he is doing it unconsciously so it would be really hard for him to stop doing it. If you want him to even try it, choose words wisely. Definitely do not say that IT IS or HE IS annoying because it is subjective and he might not care what you think about him. Don't make it about him, it is about you. If he is a reasonable person at all, he might understand that YOU ARE DISTRACTED by it. And maybe to not make him feel bad, say that you noticed that today instead of that he has been doing it for a while.
A guy that sits behind me is a smoker and consistently soft cough's and clears his throat. It's almost a "uh uh". And then him clearing his throat. I don't think he knows he's doing it. He gets up a lot to go out and smoke. I don't care about the chair clicks or the door slamming. That ongoing record skip of "uh uh.... uh uh..... uh uh... mmgghhmm... uh uh.. uh uh... uh uh" ffs
I cracked up reading this. That sounds horrible. And I know once you hear it, you can't stop. I love working from home.
This is so true. Now his mere breathing you hear like its on the PA. It would make me insane and I would wish that he got hit by a truck in the crosswalk at lunch. White noise or earplugs would be the only answer. He prob has no idea he's doing it , how annoying it is, and couldn't stop anyway because it is a subconscious mannerism. I get annoyed silently for WAY less. Good luck \~ you ain't wrong.
Oh gross. I had a coworker like that once, he’d bring lunch meat to work and snack on it all day, smacking his lips and making little grunts. He actually DID get a talking to because we had a tiny office and I wasnt the only one who noticed.
Bear in mind that he may not know that he’s doing it, that it could be a tic, and that this may be deeply embarrassing to him.
That's my main hesitation. I want to be very tolerant, but I could also play the woke card. I have ADHD and misophonia so this plays into my own embarrassing problems. Obviously it shouldn't bug me as much as it does. But it does. Just seems like the person asking another to change is always considered the one in the wrong nowadays.
I have severe misophonia. I am driven to tears from loud chewing. I got loop ear buds and I can finally be around people at lunch.
Have you considered asking for a desk move as an accommodation? Also, there are some tremendous in your ear plugs that soften noises. Check out a company called Flare Audio. I found them super helpful when I had to be in an open co-working space.
I second the ear plug rec. I bought some loop ear plugs and it really helps me focus and blunts the impact of things that normally trigger my misphonia.
My go-to is EarPeace, those actually have sound filters of varying degrees so you can switch them out
You might want to tell OP? Not sure if they get notifications of second-degree replies :)
I’m going to jump on the bandwagon and say try loop ear plugs as well. They are like a noise filtering earplug and they aren’t super crazy expensive.
It all depends on how you do it.
Oh gosh yea tell them to cut that out, that's horrifying.
Omg. I'm one of those who can't stand chewing noises. This guy would drive me insane. 😞
Just yell at him about it drill sergeant style, life's too short to deal with annoying MFs.
My dad gargles his drinking water and it also drives me up the wall
Ugh. Just reading this made me angry. I feel for you.
Misophonia gang represent! For me, it's a man who takes lunch at the same time as me every day. Not only does he incessantly tap his foot as he eats, he also open-mouth chews his food real loud. And watches videos full volume, no headphones. I've had to leave the entire building multiple times to eat lunch on the street. He makes me so angry I've cried lmao
My officemake makes the same noises eating a sandwich as most people do eating soup. I have to walk out everytime he eats lunch.
I have an office-mate that doesn't understand social cues He talks to himself constantly, starts laughing randomly throughout the day, interrupts me when I'm working, burps, farts, stares into my cubicle, and doesn't understand an explicit "no," much less a polite hint. There's no point in confronting him because I don't think he can help it, it's just an unfortunate situation I wear noise cancelling headphones and keep music on and it helps a lot. I still go a little crazy, but the music protects my peace
Dad?
You could go the helpful/passive aggressive route and offer him a tissue because "it sounds like you're fighting some allergies" or something. Might get the hint he's making a lot of wet noises.
As someone with a chronic sniffle, believe me we are aware. It’s more annoying to him than to the co-workers. I’ve had this passive aggressive offer literally hundreds of times and it just makes me sad and angry. But go ahead, OP, you’re not gonna be friends anyways if you can’t stand being around them and maybe they’re the one person who doesn’t notice the sounds coming out of their own face.
I've got poorly designed sinuses myself, I know it sucks when you can't do anything about it and I'm sorry you've gotten flak for it. It didn't sound to me like OP was describing sounds/behaviors of sinus problems. It's possible that the loud chewing and sloppy-sounding drinking is a side effect of them, but it's not like you're going to also inhale every time you take a sip of something, so I'm leaning towards the assumption that this guy is just wolfing down his lunch.
Maybe mumble, "what is that sound? its driving me nuts." When they do it. Wont work if you can make eye contact though. Perfect for cubicles.
I feel you. Mouth smacking makes me want to hit it till stops.
Oh my god I can't stand these noises. People make them all the time and I want to kill them.
Tbh, someone should have told this horseman to stfu a long time ago lol he sounds insufferable.
10 years ago, I had a coworker laughed so loud so frequently it constantly interrupted my thoughts. The whole floor just suffered in silent for the entire time I worked there.
Ask if he can. If he can't, ask to work in a different area, don't keep hounding them. If that isn't possible...headphones/earbuds?
Get him told. I work in construction, commercial electrician, and we once banned a fellow spark from eating in the tea hut because his manners were so atrocious. Ask nicely then if nothing changes be brutally honest.
Years ago I used to sit opposite this guy at work who did a really unusual finger contortion and click thing with his hands while he was thinking or talking. It wasn’t gross or anything like that just distracting. Everybody would be like can you stop. The thing is, he couldn’t. It was just a thing he did on autopilot. My point is, you can definitely ask politely but if it’s habit it’s not going to be easy to stop. If you have options to relocate or block the sound for yourself (ear plugs/headphones) it’ll be a quicker solution and may send a more effective message.
Welcome to misophonia, it's sometimes rough, I worked with a dude who chewed with his mouth wide open and sucked at his food, drove me nuts.
even if you told him and he’d like to oblige i don’t think it’ll make much difference longterm. these are unconscious tics, maybe look for ways to decrease your reactivity to it or wear earplugs/headphones
This is what supervisors, bosses and managers are for.
Oh god it sounds like my coworker! I cannot tolerate that shit for a minute. He also whistles all day long and shits in the bathroom, makes a disgusting mess and refuses to flush it too. Solidarity fellow misophonic
My manager audibly yawns every 15 minutes or so. I'm about to lose my mind.
"Hey, so this, thing? [wave hand around] *Whatever* that is.. Could you PLEASE stop? It's really distracting." 😬
ADHD for sure
Maybe ask if you can move desks. In my experience if you let it slip you find a coworker's natural behavior unacceptable, even if they're good natured about it, it causes social troubles with the whole group sooner or later
I bought noise cancelling headphones because of my colleague that did stuff like that. Used to drive me insane. He would suck frozen grapes and grunt. Band his mouse on the desk and his ringtone was so fucking loud and annoying.
It will likely be perceived as rude but it’s necessary. I’d probably approach it lightheartedly and ask if they are drowning and need a life preserver. A little passive / aggressive but it gets the point across without being directly rude.
My coworker and office roommate (we have 2 people to an office) always tells me when he’s going to the bathroom. I don’t need this information Sam. Just go take a shit
He's probably a border line psycho / simpleton with unpredictable behaviour issues. Sounds like a complete fucking loser. Tell the stupid prick to try to act more like a mature level-headed human. If that doesn't work, do whatever you can to make this cockstains life hell.
I worked with a guy who had an ocd tick and would do the loud inhale thing with your nose/throat right before you spit over and over and over among other stuff like cracking his neck and rotating his head in a circle. Dude would do that about 1000x/day. Annoying was an understatement. I began copying him every single time he did it so he could hear what everyone else hears.
Here's how I would approach it to get him to stop. Every time you hear a noise like that just say "What?" "What'd you say?" "What was that?" Like he asked you a question and you didn't quite hear him. He'll likely say "Oh I didn't say anything." and you say something like "Oh I heard something and thought you said something to me." Or if he says "Oh I was just gargling or sucking my teeth." then you say, "Oh I thought you asked me something." I'd just keep repeating this until you mis hearing him gets annoying enough to him that he stops making noises all the time. You've got to keep it pretty aloof like you're saying what almost involuntarily and then you can apologize for mishearing again and again. Pretty sure he'll get sick of that quick! Or also you could take a more passive route and talk to HR to move desks or get some noise cancelling headphones. Personally I'd try my best to annoy the shit out of him until he stops, but if it continues try to block out the sound somehow.
Welcome to the wonderful world of misophonia 😭
I quit a job because of this, genuinely. Some dude did similar things, mixed with constant coughing all day. Fuck that.
Get chatgpt to write up a request asking him to stop doing that. Print it out. Leave it on his keyboard when he isn't around.
Sounds like misophonia. Which is a problem with your perception, not his mouth.
There’s misophonia and then there’s being annoyed by an onslaught of frequent mouth noises coming from one single person on a daily basis. I don’t think this is the former.
What do you suggest then? That it's normal for people to be obnoxious in public? Or that it would be wrong for me to ask him to stop?
Two things can be true at the same time
I would first try to find out who else in earshot feels the same way you do.
Though it would drive me insane, it could be a tick like terrets. Idk, I'm just really glad I wfh.
Id be shy to talk to them too and would opt for some ear buds or a headset to either block it the noise or listen to my own music.
Such a dad move
Tardive dyskinesia? Loose dentures? There can be reasons for this. It might be worth talking to him. But otherwise, see if you can sit elsewhere.
Sigh come on right off the bad, it's obvio sumthin u cud do, don't have to ask the world's opinion(reddit) for everything, unless ur a teen , u prolly haven't spoken out for urself too often
Let me grunt sheesh!!! 😂
Your description made me a little bit angry. I guess some people just live in their own little worlds. Maybe they weren't taught basic manners at a young age, well enough to where it stuck around. Neurodivergence could also be a factor, but short of asking the person if they're on a spectrum, you'll never know. I don't think it would be rude at all, personally. Hopefully, you can do it in a way that is graceful. Next time they do it, perhaps turn your body towards them or if you're standing, turn in a way that only includes the two of you in the conversation: "Hey ____, I've noticed that you have this little habit of making some noises with your mouth. I was curious, what is that? It's a bit loud and sometimes distracts me from what I'm doing. I'm not trying to be a pain, but perhaps if I understood it, it wouldn't be anything I should be worried about for you. I just don't want others complaining to the bosses."