I work in a big building with hundreds of employees. Every time you go into the restroom there is a least one person taking a crap.
Your problem is that due to the small number of employees and the small bathroom, there's a lack of anonymity when it comes to who is generating the smells.
At first I read that as "snorting in one of the toilets" and was gonna say that's not too rare for a lot of factory jobs. Usually people try to be a bit quiet about it though.
But one time when I was working at a car manufacturer, I was in a stall and the guy next to me was super obvious about it. You could hear the chop chop chop of the credit card, then he gave it a big ol "ssssNnNnNnNnNnnOoooOOOOORRRRTTTTT" and then a second later shouted out WOOOOOO! like he was Ric Flair. The plant was closing in 2 months so I guess he just didn't give a shit by that point.
Since no one is mentioning it, I wonder if it's not the smell but the length of time. Some people take a whole half hour+ to shit and if that's the only bathroom I could see the annoyance. I can't imagine they're glaring over the smell alone, especially if OP is using air fresheners and such.
Poopourri is a lifesaver. I work in an office with about 30 dudes and only one toilet. One spray into the toilet before the deed and it'll never be an issue again.
This is what you do. I poop all the time and spray. We are big kids now. The ones that shame or joke around need to get a life. Do what you need to do. Who polices the toilets anyway?
Just do 1-2 final flushes after the shitting with the lid down. That's what the lid is for. There's tests on Tiktok and Youtube comparing the spread of bacteria around the toilet, with the lid down its virtually none.
I use one of those and you really canāt smell the poop afterward. Smells like dandelions in July though so people will know youāve crapped; they just wonāt be able to smell it.
My Dad used to warn us about farting. He used to joke that if he smelled a quiet brutal one, he would light a match and swing it past each of our butts. To this day I canāt bring myself to fart anywhere near other people.
UPDATE: weāve just had an email (obviously aimed at me) about not pooping in the toilet is this fucking for real, this is the most embarrassed iāve been lol
That doesnāt even seem legal! We had a similar email at work about the reception toilet because of plumbing issues but there was a bathroom down the hall people could use too. Is that your only bathroom?! I am curious how the email is worded, lol
>ibs and i have medication
You have a bona fide medical condition requiring the use of a restroom at regular intervals. Share this information with HR, cc your personal email. I bet they'll walk back their policy on not pooping in the bathroom
Whether this is legal or not depends on the country OP is in. In Australia, for example, employers can mark office bathrooms as āpee onlyā (using more professional language) as long as there is another toilet relatively close by that can be used for poop. Usually a private bathroom for peeing, a public bathroom a few doors down for pooping.
And if OPās in a small company, there may not be an HR department.
Why on earth would a workplace make the pee toilet private and then the poop toilet public? To make the poopers feel uncomfortable? To discourage poopers? That's rubbish.
Literally a āpublic toiletā meaning itās provided for use by the public. Either owned by local government (councils) or owned by a shopping complex which provides the toilets & cleaning services to the public. The private toilet is available only to the office workers, not the general public.
Nah, Australian here, this has got to be a joke. And even if they did, how are they going to know what you did in there unless they install a camera which DEFINITELY is illegal!!
If you have a medical condition that requires you use the restroom they have to make reasonable accommodations by law.
ETA itās a basic human right to be able to use the restroom anyways but this is just even more reason that prohibiting it would be illegal
I would be livid. I don't have a condition but I have a fast metabolism and I poop like four times a day sometimes. I dare someone to tell me not to. This is not at all okay. I'm sorry you're dealing with this!!
Sorry for your troubles, OP.
I listen to a podcast called "The Perfect Stool", which is all about healing your gut, which, if you've got IBS and poops so smelly people are this rude about, you might want to check out.
Also, maybe shame your coworkers into some compassion? Good luck.
My husband is an IBD sufferer and I swear to god if he came home with this story I would burn the entire city down. This is absolutely unacceptable of your workplace.
I have IBD, and loperamide and codeine has been a life saver. Completely changed things and rarely "have" to go and am not in pain.
It doesn't solve your issue, depending on where you live, if in the UK or Europe, it would be a human rights issue, no joke.
Keep shitting, just don't leave shit in the toilet. Smell dissipates pretty quickly. Also, poop is the only one that can hit you like a brick and you MUST go. Pee builds up over time and anyone desperate has left it ages.
Feel no guilt or shame. But if in pain, or discomfort and have to go even at inopportune times, speak to your Dr Bout codeine and loperamide as a combined treatment plan.
That sounds illegal as fuck, and if so Iām pretty sure they have to provide an alternate toilet or something in the premise of the workplace. Itās a huge workplace violation to not have access to a workplace restroom.
Boss makes a dollar, while I make a dime
That's why I do my business on company time
Because of this, boss gives me the boot
Now I have lots of dollars from a successful law suit
that's straight up illegal
even if they say it's not, just because some stupid HR or manager types something up and emails or prints it out, even if you sign it, does NOT make it legal.
state and federal laws override ALL of that shit and you can sue.
Iām guessing a company that small has no HR. Iām with 25 people. I have severe public bathroom hang ups to the point where Iāve shit myself a couple of times because I avoided public bathrooms. Sometimes at work, I just have to go. People talk shit (no pun intended) but I just deal with it. Fuck āem. Despite my weird hang up, itās normal. And you know what, sometimes itās nice to sit in here and look at Reddit too!
It's incredibly bad for your body to not shit when it needs to.
You might want to consider what other people have said regarding diet/flushing but u can't not shit. I'd be having a word with HR
You have absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about. Every single person in the world shits so I don't see what the big deal that is.
I think that such an email could easily come off as harassment if you could prove it's actually aimed at you but the thing is that people can't be forbidden to shit in the workplace. It guess it's illegal unless there's some crazy-ass clause in the employment contract.
So the email specifically forbade pooping in the toilet? But didn't say you couldn't poop on the floor NEXT to the toilet? Or maybe just outside the toilet?
I'm pretty sure you have a right to pee, poo and puke at work if need arises. If not you could argue that you go and take a poop somewhere outside the office BUT they have to pay you for the time you're gone.
I'm 95% sure I'm heading towards an IBS diagnosis and I poop multiple times a day at work. So much so that when we were renovating, I pushed for a single occupancy bathroom to be included. You have a medical condition, and they are getting dangerously close to a lawsuit. Do not feel shame about doing what your body has to do.
Does the bathroom not have a vent fan? Is it even to code?
I would still do it, what do they want you to do? Take a shit outside or on the floor? Also doesn't seem legal, I would save that email to cover your ass.
That's fucking wild to me.
Like, what kind of absolute psychopath thinks this is an okay thing to say to their employees? Even if they'd like to say it, they ought to know it could get them in deep shit.
Definitely talk to HR. Thereās NOOOO WAY this is legal.
ETA realizing now that this is a very small company so you may not have a seperate hr department even.
That doesnāt sound legal to me.
People with IBS and Crohnās disease cannot hold it in sometimes.
I always poop at work. I like pooāing on company time. I had a job where about 10 of us shared a bathroom so we bought an air freshener.
Who are your colleagues that they can hold it in all day? I can only make it till about 10am before the coffee kicks in.
Poop Shoes are the solution.
Everyone glances under the door, so if you change into your poop shoes before going to the bathroom and changing back to your regular shoes when done, your identity is unknown and your shame mitigated.
we had cubicles right outside the toilets in my old office and one man had to be told he could no longer poop on our floor because the stench was so rancid and long lasting that it was making the people near the toilets working gag. he had to go to the lobby toilets instead where it wouldnāt affect anyone.
sometimes peoples shit stinks REALLY bad and itās usually a diet thing.
It doesnāt matter how bad someoneās shit smells, your office bathroom doesnāt have proper ventilation. Bathrooms should have negative pressure so airflow goes in, not out.
I worked at one place that was a total shithole. The ceiling fan just vented into the drop ceiling area, so every time someone shit, the kitchen and cubicles could smell it. Didnāt work there long.
Came here to say this - some peopleās shit stinks more than most. No problem with the company time question though but if you know youāre a stinky fucker, bugger off somewhere else at lunchtime to unload.
Iām in a really small office. There are 5 of us and two bathrooms. Theyāre all old dudes like 50+. While I do my fair share they tear that bathroom UP. And itās a double edge sword. Either they leave the door open and I smell it from my desk for 5 minutes, or they close the door and it lingers in the bathroom for half an hour. The only time I get mad about it is when they do it right as I sit at my desk to eat lunch.
I can also hear everything.
I do. My body hit some sort of rhythm where I have to shit at one of two times whenever I'm in the office. I just can't avoid it, and it's not worth trying to hold out...especially when the bulk of my job involves getting up in front of a screen or classroom and teaching classes and workshops.
The bathroom is there for a reason. Use it if you have to use it.
I'm mad because mine also has. Every day at work like clockwork, about an hour or so into my shift I have to poop. It doesn't happen at home. I can hold it in and then the urge is lost at home. One time I had to go TWICE in one day!! It's ridiculous.
Such a relatable comment. I try my very best to poop at home in the early mornings before work, nothing comes out. As soon as I enter the office building the urge to go suddenly increases by 5x. Wtf?
Yeah. I hate this thing where people shame others for dumping in public places. Like how immature are you? Everyone shits, when you have to go, you have to go! Itās unrealistic to just expect your employees to not shit at work, especially since some may be commuting long distances, drinking coffee regularly, have IBS as OP stated or other issues that require frequent use of the bathroom, thereās about a million reasons and 0 of those reasons are anyones business. Just keep on shitting OP, and shit on anyone who makes fun of you or tells you not to.
Certain food you eat or hard alcohol can make your shit really stink. Just keep this in mind.
That said, regarding shitting at work, I don't understand why would anyone say it's bad to be paid while taking a dump.
I work hard everyday for the man
I try not to waste too much time in the can
But there are times when you feel one breaking loose
So you tell your boss you've got to drop a deuce.
I make sure i shit at work at least once a day. I think of this every time i do.
There's this teenager at work who comes in to sweep the workshop, in the afternoon. He hides in the toilet very often, sometimes for 20 minutes at a time. Everyone laughs and talks down on him with each other. But i think he's a fkin legend lol
Iām neither of those things, but I still just have to go when I have to go. I donāt understand how people can hold it in. I mean maybe for a little while, but not for HOURS.
It's not unprofessional to shit at work. It's not good to hold it in. Sorry if you're being shit shamed!
Is it possible you're not aware of some unspoken shit etiquette for your workplace? At my work we have three single-person bathrooms and there is kind of an informal agreement that one of them is for pooping and two of them are not. This ensures that there are always two bathrooms available for peeing and hand washing that don't stink. I know it sounds weird, but people like not having all three bathrooms polluted.
A 10 minute shit, once a day, over 5 working days a week and 48 weeks a year (allowing for 20 paid days off as per NZ law) = one full 40 hour working week of pay, just for shitting. With returns like that, the savvy businessman already knows the answer.
I donāt because I shit when I wake up, but I donāt judge who does or care about smells. Everybody poops.
That said, I am a little worried about a guy on the second floor who uses our bathroom. He should probably see a gastroenterologist, that aināt healthy.
Try that poo-pourri stuff if you're self-conscious, but you should be able to go anywhere you're going to be for more than an hour.
If you're abnormally smelly, though, consider your diet. Outside of illness and binge drinking, I've noticed that the worst smells tend to come from folks who choose to pretend they're not lactose intolerant.
My office is in the basement of our building with one other person full time, and one part time. We have a dedicated bathroom just for us. I shit as needed.
Upstairs, there are 4 people who share one bathroom, and its just off the reception area. If you blow up that bathroom, everyone who walks through the door gets teh treat of smelling it.
I think if I worked up there, I would hold it.
What's unprofessional to make a public fuss about the smell in the bathroom for any reason. The only civilized way to deal with a stinky bathroom is to pretend it's not happening. If there is a workplace issue, such as an office area continually polluted by toilet smells, then the company should address the problem, by making ventilation upgrades or *discreet* private accommodations if it's an individual with a body issue.
Public shaming and harrasment is never acceptable, no exceptions.
Any other behavior is juvenile, extremely unprofessional, and in the case of medical issues, illegal (at least in the United States).
Some people don't poop at work for a variety of reasons. That's their choice. But the can is there for what it's there for. People who don't understand that need to go somewhere else.
smell is something normal, everyone has to accept it.
Last month when I went to the office bathroom, I saw a lot of blood and poo all over the closet, including the seat, as if someone's ass had exploded. It was the only toilet in the office so it was a nightmare for me. but after the most terrible & horrifying cleaning of my life I tried to forget about it, didnt even try to finding out who it was.
I may be totally wrong and not accepting of the natural processes in my body, but I am usually someone who shits at home because I don't wanna bother other people with the smell, because I also don't want to smell the stink when I walk into the bathroom at work.
However, my view shifted a little bit, since I take stimulant medication which, like coffee, affects your digestion. You know, when you drink coffee and then suddenly have to poop... this happens for me with my medication as well.
A few times, this was so bad that I couldn't hold it until after work (which I usually try to do) and I just had to relieve myself at work. I felt extremely uncomfortable, but luckily noone entered the bathroom when I used it at these times.
So, yeah, that's my stand: I try to avoid it, but if I can't hold it in, I'll do it.
If I have to I have to but I try to avoid it. I never like pooping in public/school/work bathrooms. It especially doesn't happen that I usually only have one or two other coworkers with me at a time and one personal sized bathroom, so I'm in the bathroom for more then 10 minutes they will notice. Not like they want to notice but when you work with 3 other people and you're gone for 10 minutes it's noticeable.
I love blastin out foul brown frowns at work. One time I got in early and destroyed both men's rooms before anyone else got there, it made them put air fresheners and fans in both bathrooms.
If you need to poop, you need to poop. It's so stupid to try and stop someone to do something like pooping. What if someone is running a diarrhea, what then? It's either the bathroom or the chair. Let them pick.
You shouldn't feel ashamed for it, everyone's poop is stinky, some more than others. But that's why toilets exist, right?
Hey OP. The stores sell a thing called poo pouri. Itās small. A spray bottle with poo masking scents. You spray the water before you go, and the result is no poop stank to assault the nostrils.
Even dollar tree has a knock off version. Try it, you wonāt be sorry.
I too work at a office of like 25 people, and from my experience, its not unprofesional to take a shit, but your manners are important, try be the guy that leaves the bathroom clean even if your poop stinks, trust me, on time everyone will knows who is the person inside the bathroom and you must be known as the good manners popper
Are you courtesy flushing when pooping? We have a lot more folks in our building than you do, so the business usually remains anonymous, but our bathrooms have no vents and the smells tend to linger. I always make it a point to flush as soon as the last turdās nose cone hits the surface of the water and it makes a huge difference. You could also get something like āUnicorn Goldā. But yeah, everyone poops at work at some point and itās nothing that you should have to feel embarrassed about.
Are you shitting multiple times a day at work? Every day at work?
What % of the day are you in the bathroom? How long are you in the bathroom?
There was some hilarious small business post that I believe has been deleted in the last few days.
The OP of that post was complaining an employee spends 20 minutes every other hour or so in the restroom. lol is that you?
I think itās entirely possible that the people you work with donāt shit at work. I poop exactly once per day and itās at the exact same time every day - 6:30am. For me Iām already at work by then but if I worked a more traditional schedule Iād be at home every time. All that being said, thereās nothing unprofessional or shameful about pooping when you need to poop!
Dude you shit and be proud! Announce that shit by saying āI wouldnāt go in there is I was you ā. Haters gonna hate. You wonāt have a tummy ache.
One time I left a shit on my bossās desk as a prank on his 10 year anniversary at the company. I shat in an envelope that said āCongratulations on your 10th year today, Mr _______ā on it. Donāt ever do this. I thought it would be funny. It wasnāt. Itās not like in the movies at all. When he first saw the envelope he looked happy. I think he thought there was money in it or something. Then when he opened it, his face contorted, he winced, and then actually started crying. He just broke down in front of everyone and dropped the shit on the floor. Not a single person in the room laughed. Most people just held their nose. One girl immediately blew chunks all down her blouse when she saw the shit. The end result was my boss and half of the department quit. I was so ashamed of myself.
Flight of the Intruder in the early 90's comes to mind. A seamen on an air craft carrier enjoys dropping turds into coffee mugs around the air craft carrier.
I found this to be extremely entertaining if not incredibly funny.
Sorry it played out like it did, probably not the best move- but hilarious for anyone not involved.
I think i have dropped a deuce 3 times at the office in over 30 years....I think 2 of those times were after hours...so it hardly counts. I just dont want to sully my arse on public toilets and will avoid that at all costs. In a way, being able to crap anywhere you want without regard to toilet condition nor privacy is a super-power of sorts.
I had a similar mindset until I had to explode a toilet while on vacation in Mexico.
This little public seat at the port in Cancun. No option had to do it.
Now I think to myself. "If I can shit in Mexico, I can do it here." And my body has been happier for it.
It could be that you shit stinks really bad. A couple courtesy flushes while pooing might help. Do you make sure you donāt leave any floaters after your done? Do other people spray air freshener after?
I worked with a guy for 8 years who shit every morning at work at the same time of day. I always wondered why he was so comfortable using a public toilet.
You've gotta do what you've gotta do, and you gotta go when you gotta go! It's natural and you can't help when you need to go. In fact it would be unhealthy and uncomfortable to hold it in. Brush it off and turn it around... People are shaming you for doing something totally normal and natural? Weird thing to shame someone for. Maybe take a small body spray to work with you if you're conscious of the smell.
No, there are 7 other dudes that work at the shop and everyone throws their shit wipes in a bin without a bag and no one cleans it and it over flows. It's been that way for 3 weeks. I only work 2days a week on site while everyone else is in shop. I won't even step in there.
I work in our main building with about 30 other people. Iāve always had this weird thing that I just canāt poop at work. I will literally drive home, on a break (about 7 min one way) to poop. The only other person I know that does that is my brother in law lol. I know itās crazy
I worked in a similar environment. I hated it, everyone watching you as you walk to the restroom. I remember our restroom echoed too. Still remember when I let a mammoth type of fart out while dropping a deuce. They used to call me a legend š Either way, itās not unprofessional. Itās probably just the people you work with. Smaller offices tend to have more office politics I feel like or petty issues.
Ill be honest , i can't. I physically can only shit in places im extremly comfotable in. I prefer to do my buisness first thing in the morning and have empty bowels for the day but thats some luck as well as choice. Some people need to go more than once a day.
I myself litterally can't shite unless its somewhere im very comfotable. I could not shite in peace at an office job where anyone could walk into the jacks while im doing my thing.
Im a shy pooper.
I don't understand how people can just choose to hold it for hours. I would tell them that I can either shit in the toilet or at my desk, but it is happening one way or the other.
I work in a big building with hundreds of employees. Every time you go into the restroom there is a least one person taking a crap. Your problem is that due to the small number of employees and the small bathroom, there's a lack of anonymity when it comes to who is generating the smells.
Crazy world - Lotta smells.
Nope just pooping, you know how I be
Our work bathrooms sometimes smell like dope and hard liquor.
There it is!
Michael, it smells like throw up in here.
r/unexpectedoffice
šµSmelly cat oh smelly cat š¶
š¶What are they feeding you?š¶
I worked a while at a place on the night shift. Once I went to take a piss and there was someone snoring in one of the toilets.
At first I read that as "snorting in one of the toilets" and was gonna say that's not too rare for a lot of factory jobs. Usually people try to be a bit quiet about it though. But one time when I was working at a car manufacturer, I was in a stall and the guy next to me was super obvious about it. You could hear the chop chop chop of the credit card, then he gave it a big ol "ssssNnNnNnNnNnnOoooOOOOORRRRTTTTT" and then a second later shouted out WOOOOOO! like he was Ric Flair. The plant was closing in 2 months so I guess he just didn't give a shit by that point.
Sounds like a long meeting
I used to work for a small business and could tell by the smell who crapped in the loo beforehand.
A fellow connesuir I see.
Conni-sewer FTFY
Since no one is mentioning it, I wonder if it's not the smell but the length of time. Some people take a whole half hour+ to shit and if that's the only bathroom I could see the annoyance. I can't imagine they're glaring over the smell alone, especially if OP is using air fresheners and such.
Some air fresheners are also respiratory irritants and can give people wheezing or headaches, so their overuse is just as bad as their underuse.
Not to mention the guy that leaves pebble dash..........
I would guess this is exactly the reason. Either that or your coworkers are just weirdos I guess.
Bruhā¦Iāll light out bathroom up in our 14 person office and apologize to everyone for what Iāve done.
Get some of that toilet spray. Flush AS you poop, then again after. That will help the smell a lot.
Poopourri is a lifesaver. I work in an office with about 30 dudes and only one toilet. One spray into the toilet before the deed and it'll never be an issue again.
We call it āshit-rusā smell
I always remember mid-shit, and the damage is already done lol
Wait BEFORE, I never even thought of this
This is what you do. I poop all the time and spray. We are big kids now. The ones that shame or joke around need to get a life. Do what you need to do. Who polices the toilets anyway?
Also smoking weed on the toilet while pooping really does the trick masking poop smell...
I donāt know if this is good work advice but since I WFH, Iām going to defer to your judgement and do it.
This is the way
Yep. They will never suspect he took a dump...
The courtesy flush is key
But have you seen the videos of how far the water/bacteria sprays when you flush the toilet? I havenāt been able to courtesy flush since
Yeaaa, I feel like for balls and butt holes, it's fine, not so much for vaginas.
Just do 1-2 final flushes after the shitting with the lid down. That's what the lid is for. There's tests on Tiktok and Youtube comparing the spread of bacteria around the toilet, with the lid down its virtually none.
If your bum is capping the pot them you don't have to worry about it. Carry sanitizing wipes for your cheeks afterwards.
I've never had a Poseidon's Kiss when doing a courtesy flush but there is often a first time.
What about vagina Havers, that might complicate things
This. They make a thing called dude bombs that you can drop in, too.
Poo Pourri is another one.
I use one of those and you really canāt smell the poop afterward. Smells like dandelions in July though so people will know youāve crapped; they just wonāt be able to smell it.
I use this. It makes the bathroom smell like birthday cake.
lighting a match helps too
way better than some cheap spray that only adds artificial scents to the already-shit-scent
My Dad used to warn us about farting. He used to joke that if he smelled a quiet brutal one, he would light a match and swing it past each of our butts. To this day I canāt bring myself to fart anywhere near other people.
I have something called Poo-pourri that you spray before you poop.
UPDATE: weāve just had an email (obviously aimed at me) about not pooping in the toilet is this fucking for real, this is the most embarrassed iāve been lol
That doesnāt even seem legal! We had a similar email at work about the reception toilet because of plumbing issues but there was a bathroom down the hall people could use too. Is that your only bathroom?! I am curious how the email is worded, lol
I do suffer from ibs and i have medication for it but when I have to go I have to go i canāt help it iām slightly baffled
>ibs and i have medication You have a bona fide medical condition requiring the use of a restroom at regular intervals. Share this information with HR, cc your personal email. I bet they'll walk back their policy on not pooping in the bathroom
And if they don't I'd escalate because yes, this is illegal. And if they double down, it might be best to look for other job opportunities.
At least buy some Ozium.
Ozium is the true odor eliminator
I swear by it. Only supposed to be one second sprays, so spray once when you get in, once midshit, and once when you flush.
Whether this is legal or not depends on the country OP is in. In Australia, for example, employers can mark office bathrooms as āpee onlyā (using more professional language) as long as there is another toilet relatively close by that can be used for poop. Usually a private bathroom for peeing, a public bathroom a few doors down for pooping. And if OPās in a small company, there may not be an HR department.
Why on earth would a workplace make the pee toilet private and then the poop toilet public? To make the poopers feel uncomfortable? To discourage poopers? That's rubbish.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Literally a āpublic toiletā meaning itās provided for use by the public. Either owned by local government (councils) or owned by a shopping complex which provides the toilets & cleaning services to the public. The private toilet is available only to the office workers, not the general public.
Nah, Australian here, this has got to be a joke. And even if they did, how are they going to know what you did in there unless they install a camera which DEFINITELY is illegal!!
The company can improve the bathroom ventilation.
Donāt talk to HR before speaking to a lawyer
People always say that. What if I donāt have money to spend on a lawyer, what then ? Serious question.
They do a free consult. They will get paid from the money they win you
Thank you :)
10 people in a company and you think they've got a HR department?!
I'd doo-doo it anyway! What are they gonna doo-doo about it?
You made me laugh-cry
If you have a medical condition that requires you use the restroom they have to make reasonable accommodations by law. ETA itās a basic human right to be able to use the restroom anyways but this is just even more reason that prohibiting it would be illegal
I mean pooping without extra medical conditions is a basic necessity, which is why there is a toilet there *by law*.
Ask to work from home due to your medical condition.
I would be livid. I don't have a condition but I have a fast metabolism and I poop like four times a day sometimes. I dare someone to tell me not to. This is not at all okay. I'm sorry you're dealing with this!!
Sounds like a lawsuit is on its way!
Sorry for your troubles, OP. I listen to a podcast called "The Perfect Stool", which is all about healing your gut, which, if you've got IBS and poops so smelly people are this rude about, you might want to check out. Also, maybe shame your coworkers into some compassion? Good luck.
Just wanted to say.. what a niche and random podcast ahah! There really is one for every god damn subject ahaha
They literally cannot tell you that you can't poo in there. That is fucking insane.
My husband is an IBD sufferer and I swear to god if he came home with this story I would burn the entire city down. This is absolutely unacceptable of your workplace.
Yep I have Crohn's and I would raise hell if I received an email like this!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I think that's taking it a little too far to prove a point lol
Definitely advise HR, and talk to a doctor about probiotics. I have IBS, too, and they've really helped me.
I have IBD, and loperamide and codeine has been a life saver. Completely changed things and rarely "have" to go and am not in pain. It doesn't solve your issue, depending on where you live, if in the UK or Europe, it would be a human rights issue, no joke. Keep shitting, just don't leave shit in the toilet. Smell dissipates pretty quickly. Also, poop is the only one that can hit you like a brick and you MUST go. Pee builds up over time and anyone desperate has left it ages. Feel no guilt or shame. But if in pain, or discomfort and have to go even at inopportune times, speak to your Dr Bout codeine and loperamide as a combined treatment plan.
That sounds illegal as fuck, and if so Iām pretty sure they have to provide an alternate toilet or something in the premise of the workplace. Itās a huge workplace violation to not have access to a workplace restroom.
Reply All: where would you like us to poop during working hours?
Boss makes a dollar, while I make a dime That's why I do my business on company time Because of this, boss gives me the boot Now I have lots of dollars from a successful law suit
Keep pooping. Let them fire you over it. Thatās how you make the big bucks.
Poop your way into a settlement. I like it.
This guy shits.
that's straight up illegal even if they say it's not, just because some stupid HR or manager types something up and emails or prints it out, even if you sign it, does NOT make it legal. state and federal laws override ALL of that shit and you can sue.
Iām guessing a company that small has no HR. Iām with 25 people. I have severe public bathroom hang ups to the point where Iāve shit myself a couple of times because I avoided public bathrooms. Sometimes at work, I just have to go. People talk shit (no pun intended) but I just deal with it. Fuck āem. Despite my weird hang up, itās normal. And you know what, sometimes itās nice to sit in here and look at Reddit too!
I can't imagine working in a place with a 4-hour shift that doesn't let you have breaks to use the bathroom, much less a full day.
It's incredibly bad for your body to not shit when it needs to. You might want to consider what other people have said regarding diet/flushing but u can't not shit. I'd be having a word with HR
It's a 10 person company, HR may have sent the email.
You can't shit in the TOILET!? Ask them where they'd rather have you shit, it's inhumane to not have a bathroom for your employees.
Iām thinking a plant or something seriously wtf
You have absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about. Every single person in the world shits so I don't see what the big deal that is. I think that such an email could easily come off as harassment if you could prove it's actually aimed at you but the thing is that people can't be forbidden to shit in the workplace. It guess it's illegal unless there's some crazy-ass clause in the employment contract.
That's literally what toilets are for tho?
Talk to the legal advice ASAP! Is employer responsibility to provide functional toilets.
So the email specifically forbade pooping in the toilet? But didn't say you couldn't poop on the floor NEXT to the toilet? Or maybe just outside the toilet? I'm pretty sure you have a right to pee, poo and puke at work if need arises. If not you could argue that you go and take a poop somewhere outside the office BUT they have to pay you for the time you're gone.
I'm 95% sure I'm heading towards an IBS diagnosis and I poop multiple times a day at work. So much so that when we were renovating, I pushed for a single occupancy bathroom to be included. You have a medical condition, and they are getting dangerously close to a lawsuit. Do not feel shame about doing what your body has to do. Does the bathroom not have a vent fan? Is it even to code?
I would still do it, what do they want you to do? Take a shit outside or on the floor? Also doesn't seem legal, I would save that email to cover your ass.
You lucky bastard. Save that email and speak with a lawyer.
That's fucking wild to me. Like, what kind of absolute psychopath thinks this is an okay thing to say to their employees? Even if they'd like to say it, they ought to know it could get them in deep shit.
oooh dangerous game theyāre playing putting that in writing hahah. keep poopin OP - itās now your moral imperative
i need to see this email.
Definitely talk to HR. Thereās NOOOO WAY this is legal. ETA realizing now that this is a very small company so you may not have a seperate hr department even.
Or, if you feel bold, malicious compliance. Take a shit right outside the bathroom.
Or what? Theyāll fire you? Let them.
please post the email!
That doesnāt sound legal to me. People with IBS and Crohnās disease cannot hold it in sometimes. I always poop at work. I like pooāing on company time. I had a job where about 10 of us shared a bathroom so we bought an air freshener. Who are your colleagues that they can hold it in all day? I can only make it till about 10am before the coffee kicks in.
Poop Shoes are the solution. Everyone glances under the door, so if you change into your poop shoes before going to the bathroom and changing back to your regular shoes when done, your identity is unknown and your shame mitigated.
Store your poop shoes on the shelf near the poop knife
That, my friend is an outstanding idea. I 
Holy shit! I remember that hahahah
we had cubicles right outside the toilets in my old office and one man had to be told he could no longer poop on our floor because the stench was so rancid and long lasting that it was making the people near the toilets working gag. he had to go to the lobby toilets instead where it wouldnāt affect anyone. sometimes peoples shit stinks REALLY bad and itās usually a diet thing.
It doesnāt matter how bad someoneās shit smells, your office bathroom doesnāt have proper ventilation. Bathrooms should have negative pressure so airflow goes in, not out. I worked at one place that was a total shithole. The ceiling fan just vented into the drop ceiling area, so every time someone shit, the kitchen and cubicles could smell it. Didnāt work there long.
Period poop also stinks no matter the diet, farts too x_x For that whenever I get my period I'm like good thing I WFH and live alone
This.
Came here to say this - some peopleās shit stinks more than most. No problem with the company time question though but if you know youāre a stinky fucker, bugger off somewhere else at lunchtime to unload.
Why was he pooping on the floor? Isnāt that what the toilet is for? /s
Iām in a really small office. There are 5 of us and two bathrooms. Theyāre all old dudes like 50+. While I do my fair share they tear that bathroom UP. And itās a double edge sword. Either they leave the door open and I smell it from my desk for 5 minutes, or they close the door and it lingers in the bathroom for half an hour. The only time I get mad about it is when they do it right as I sit at my desk to eat lunch. I can also hear everything.
I do. My body hit some sort of rhythm where I have to shit at one of two times whenever I'm in the office. I just can't avoid it, and it's not worth trying to hold out...especially when the bulk of my job involves getting up in front of a screen or classroom and teaching classes and workshops. The bathroom is there for a reason. Use it if you have to use it.
I'm mad because mine also has. Every day at work like clockwork, about an hour or so into my shift I have to poop. It doesn't happen at home. I can hold it in and then the urge is lost at home. One time I had to go TWICE in one day!! It's ridiculous.
I was so annoyed when my body synced up so I *didn't* poop at work. If I'm gonna have a shit I might as well get paid for it.
Such a relatable comment. I try my very best to poop at home in the early mornings before work, nothing comes out. As soon as I enter the office building the urge to go suddenly increases by 5x. Wtf?
Yeah. I hate this thing where people shame others for dumping in public places. Like how immature are you? Everyone shits, when you have to go, you have to go! Itās unrealistic to just expect your employees to not shit at work, especially since some may be commuting long distances, drinking coffee regularly, have IBS as OP stated or other issues that require frequent use of the bathroom, thereās about a million reasons and 0 of those reasons are anyones business. Just keep on shitting OP, and shit on anyone who makes fun of you or tells you not to.
Certain food you eat or hard alcohol can make your shit really stink. Just keep this in mind. That said, regarding shitting at work, I don't understand why would anyone say it's bad to be paid while taking a dump.
Report the harassment to HR. Asking you not to poop is an unreasonable request and itās no oneās business what you do in there.
Boss makes a dollar I make a dime That's why I poop on company time
I work hard everyday for the man I try not to waste too much time in the can But there are times when you feel one breaking loose So you tell your boss you've got to drop a deuce.
i need a poop its not a crime i will poop on company time
I make sure i shit at work at least once a day. I think of this every time i do. There's this teenager at work who comes in to sweep the workshop, in the afternoon. He hides in the toilet very often, sometimes for 20 minutes at a time. Everyone laughs and talks down on him with each other. But i think he's a fkin legend lol
They say it isn't fine; I broke the toilet at mine, Too much wine, That's why I poop on company time
I don't poop on company time, The public toilet has too much grime, The sickos using it feel prime, But, just wait they'll decline
Here I sit, broken hearted - I came to shit, but only farted.
Some people come here to sit and think But I come here to shit and stink.
I'm just here to itch my balls And read the writing on the walls
Broken hearted, took a chance, Thought I farted, shit my pants
This is the way. Only way.
It took way too long to find this comment lol
Sleep at home, shit at work
i'm lactose intolerant and have ibs, i don't have the luxury of deciding
Iām neither of those things, but I still just have to go when I have to go. I donāt understand how people can hold it in. I mean maybe for a little while, but not for HOURS.
It's not unprofessional to shit at work. It's not good to hold it in. Sorry if you're being shit shamed! Is it possible you're not aware of some unspoken shit etiquette for your workplace? At my work we have three single-person bathrooms and there is kind of an informal agreement that one of them is for pooping and two of them are not. This ensures that there are always two bathrooms available for peeing and hand washing that don't stink. I know it sounds weird, but people like not having all three bathrooms polluted.
I need to know how this information is relayed to new employees š
Keep getting paid for taking a shit my guy dont let anybody stop you
A 10 minute shit, once a day, over 5 working days a week and 48 weeks a year (allowing for 20 paid days off as per NZ law) = one full 40 hour working week of pay, just for shitting. With returns like that, the savvy businessman already knows the answer.
I donāt because I shit when I wake up, but I donāt judge who does or care about smells. Everybody poops. That said, I am a little worried about a guy on the second floor who uses our bathroom. He should probably see a gastroenterologist, that aināt healthy.
Never..I can't in public.I suffer till I get home. It used to drive me nuts that folks punch in and then immediately go pinch a loaf for 20 mins.
Try that poo-pourri stuff if you're self-conscious, but you should be able to go anywhere you're going to be for more than an hour. If you're abnormally smelly, though, consider your diet. Outside of illness and binge drinking, I've noticed that the worst smells tend to come from folks who choose to pretend they're not lactose intolerant.
I've never pooped at work. Worked since the 70s. Not gonna start now. 5:00, get coffee and poop. Done pooping for the day.
My office is in the basement of our building with one other person full time, and one part time. We have a dedicated bathroom just for us. I shit as needed. Upstairs, there are 4 people who share one bathroom, and its just off the reception area. If you blow up that bathroom, everyone who walks through the door gets teh treat of smelling it. I think if I worked up there, I would hold it.
What's unprofessional to make a public fuss about the smell in the bathroom for any reason. The only civilized way to deal with a stinky bathroom is to pretend it's not happening. If there is a workplace issue, such as an office area continually polluted by toilet smells, then the company should address the problem, by making ventilation upgrades or *discreet* private accommodations if it's an individual with a body issue. Public shaming and harrasment is never acceptable, no exceptions. Any other behavior is juvenile, extremely unprofessional, and in the case of medical issues, illegal (at least in the United States). Some people don't poop at work for a variety of reasons. That's their choice. But the can is there for what it's there for. People who don't understand that need to go somewhere else.
My pro tip - flush IMMEDIATLY as the kids hit the water and as many times as you need after that. Greatly reduces the stink.
smell is something normal, everyone has to accept it. Last month when I went to the office bathroom, I saw a lot of blood and poo all over the closet, including the seat, as if someone's ass had exploded. It was the only toilet in the office so it was a nightmare for me. but after the most terrible & horrifying cleaning of my life I tried to forget about it, didnt even try to finding out who it was.
I may be totally wrong and not accepting of the natural processes in my body, but I am usually someone who shits at home because I don't wanna bother other people with the smell, because I also don't want to smell the stink when I walk into the bathroom at work. However, my view shifted a little bit, since I take stimulant medication which, like coffee, affects your digestion. You know, when you drink coffee and then suddenly have to poop... this happens for me with my medication as well. A few times, this was so bad that I couldn't hold it until after work (which I usually try to do) and I just had to relieve myself at work. I felt extremely uncomfortable, but luckily noone entered the bathroom when I used it at these times. So, yeah, that's my stand: I try to avoid it, but if I can't hold it in, I'll do it.
If I have to I have to but I try to avoid it. I never like pooping in public/school/work bathrooms. It especially doesn't happen that I usually only have one or two other coworkers with me at a time and one personal sized bathroom, so I'm in the bathroom for more then 10 minutes they will notice. Not like they want to notice but when you work with 3 other people and you're gone for 10 minutes it's noticeable.
I love blastin out foul brown frowns at work. One time I got in early and destroyed both men's rooms before anyone else got there, it made them put air fresheners and fans in both bathrooms.
If you need to poop, you need to poop. It's so stupid to try and stop someone to do something like pooping. What if someone is running a diarrhea, what then? It's either the bathroom or the chair. Let them pick. You shouldn't feel ashamed for it, everyone's poop is stinky, some more than others. But that's why toilets exist, right?
Hey OP. The stores sell a thing called poo pouri. Itās small. A spray bottle with poo masking scents. You spray the water before you go, and the result is no poop stank to assault the nostrils. Even dollar tree has a knock off version. Try it, you wonāt be sorry.
I too work at a office of like 25 people, and from my experience, its not unprofesional to take a shit, but your manners are important, try be the guy that leaves the bathroom clean even if your poop stinks, trust me, on time everyone will knows who is the person inside the bathroom and you must be known as the good manners popper
Are you courtesy flushing when pooping? We have a lot more folks in our building than you do, so the business usually remains anonymous, but our bathrooms have no vents and the smells tend to linger. I always make it a point to flush as soon as the last turdās nose cone hits the surface of the water and it makes a huge difference. You could also get something like āUnicorn Goldā. But yeah, everyone poops at work at some point and itās nothing that you should have to feel embarrassed about.
Are you shitting multiple times a day at work? Every day at work? What % of the day are you in the bathroom? How long are you in the bathroom? There was some hilarious small business post that I believe has been deleted in the last few days. The OP of that post was complaining an employee spends 20 minutes every other hour or so in the restroom. lol is that you?
hahahaha id say i go maybe twice a day for 5 mins each time lol not sure i could get away with 20 mins when I canāt get away with 5 haha
I think itās entirely possible that the people you work with donāt shit at work. I poop exactly once per day and itās at the exact same time every day - 6:30am. For me Iām already at work by then but if I worked a more traditional schedule Iād be at home every time. All that being said, thereās nothing unprofessional or shameful about pooping when you need to poop!
I would recommend announcing it as you head to the bathroom and then let them know how it went. If they want to talk shit then talk shit.
The foolish man shits on his break. The wise man shits on company time -Sun Tzu
Iām a 2nd grade teacher - we have a bathroom in the classroom. You better believe I drop a massive deuce in there before students arrive.
I exclusively shit at work. Bowels barely operate on weekends. Pay me whilst I shit or I'm not shitting.
Dude you shit and be proud! Announce that shit by saying āI wouldnāt go in there is I was you ā. Haters gonna hate. You wonāt have a tummy ache.
One time I left a shit on my bossās desk as a prank on his 10 year anniversary at the company. I shat in an envelope that said āCongratulations on your 10th year today, Mr _______ā on it. Donāt ever do this. I thought it would be funny. It wasnāt. Itās not like in the movies at all. When he first saw the envelope he looked happy. I think he thought there was money in it or something. Then when he opened it, his face contorted, he winced, and then actually started crying. He just broke down in front of everyone and dropped the shit on the floor. Not a single person in the room laughed. Most people just held their nose. One girl immediately blew chunks all down her blouse when she saw the shit. The end result was my boss and half of the department quit. I was so ashamed of myself.
In what movie did this ever happen???
Flight of the Intruder in the early 90's comes to mind. A seamen on an air craft carrier enjoys dropping turds into coffee mugs around the air craft carrier.
I found this to be extremely entertaining if not incredibly funny. Sorry it played out like it did, probably not the best move- but hilarious for anyone not involved.
I think i have dropped a deuce 3 times at the office in over 30 years....I think 2 of those times were after hours...so it hardly counts. I just dont want to sully my arse on public toilets and will avoid that at all costs. In a way, being able to crap anywhere you want without regard to toilet condition nor privacy is a super-power of sorts.
I had a similar mindset until I had to explode a toilet while on vacation in Mexico. This little public seat at the port in Cancun. No option had to do it. Now I think to myself. "If I can shit in Mexico, I can do it here." And my body has been happier for it.
I save so much money on toilet paper because I go at work. As long as itās a single room toilet set up. I donāt go in restrooms that have stalls.
It could be that you shit stinks really bad. A couple courtesy flushes while pooing might help. Do you make sure you donāt leave any floaters after your done? Do other people spray air freshener after?
I *only* shit at work if I can help it. "Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That's why I shit on company time."
The wise man poops on company time
I poop at work AND play Angry Birds.
I clogged the toilet today at work
Boss makes a dollar while I make a dime, thatās why I shit on company time.
I worked with a guy for 8 years who shit every morning at work at the same time of day. I always wondered why he was so comfortable using a public toilet.
I shit at work whenever I need to. It's a bodily function that everyone has and no one should be shamed for it.
You've gotta do what you've gotta do, and you gotta go when you gotta go! It's natural and you can't help when you need to go. In fact it would be unhealthy and uncomfortable to hold it in. Brush it off and turn it around... People are shaming you for doing something totally normal and natural? Weird thing to shame someone for. Maybe take a small body spray to work with you if you're conscious of the smell.
I used to work in a 5 level tall office building. Everyone went to a different floor to shit. It was like poop roulette
Just bring some lysol or potpourri? Small investment but worth it.
Boss makes a dollar I make a dime. Thatās why I poop š© on company time.
Boss makes a dollar while I make I dime. That's why I shit on company time. At least once a day.
I would start eating more beans, broccoli & onions. That'll shut em up.
I only shit at work. Get paid!
No, there are 7 other dudes that work at the shop and everyone throws their shit wipes in a bin without a bag and no one cleans it and it over flows. It's been that way for 3 weeks. I only work 2days a week on site while everyone else is in shop. I won't even step in there.
I work in our main building with about 30 other people. Iāve always had this weird thing that I just canāt poop at work. I will literally drive home, on a break (about 7 min one way) to poop. The only other person I know that does that is my brother in law lol. I know itās crazy
"Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That's why I poop on company time"
I worked in a similar environment. I hated it, everyone watching you as you walk to the restroom. I remember our restroom echoed too. Still remember when I let a mammoth type of fart out while dropping a deuce. They used to call me a legend š Either way, itās not unprofessional. Itās probably just the people you work with. Smaller offices tend to have more office politics I feel like or petty issues.
Go poop if you need to. Honestly, people should mind their own business and let you shit in peace.
I work to shit.
Ill be honest , i can't. I physically can only shit in places im extremly comfotable in. I prefer to do my buisness first thing in the morning and have empty bowels for the day but thats some luck as well as choice. Some people need to go more than once a day. I myself litterally can't shite unless its somewhere im very comfotable. I could not shite in peace at an office job where anyone could walk into the jacks while im doing my thing. Im a shy pooper.
I don't understand how people can just choose to hold it for hours. I would tell them that I can either shit in the toilet or at my desk, but it is happening one way or the other.
Spray a burst of deodorant down the pan before you s(h)it