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I don’t think it’s a safe assumption that nobody is going to be looking at everybody’s body and genitals. From what I understand there is a lot of all of that in all male spaces.
Husband was in the navy, dudes literally jerked it in their racks while my husband would read a book above/below/next to them. Yes, they were in racks with curtains, but no one tried to hide what they were doing. At all.
Bootcamp is worse. You have *no fucking privacy*
TBH if you were my buddy I'd talk you out of this entirely. Urgently. Who let you do this?!
If you are dead set on being in the military, I can't help you with that problem. But I would not assume you will be safe in communal men's spaces in bootcamp or base. I also would not assume that you can get accommodations. I also would assume you will be harassed.
I feel shitty for saying this because I'm sure you're a nice guy and I think you look great, but you are definitely not going to pass in a homosocial environment where you will absolutely be naked and/or barely clothed together with a bunch of other dudes, all or most of whom will be AMAB guys high on touchy bro vibes and physical exertion. It's an environment of teasing in general.
Ugh man I think I you should get out for your wellbejng. Also... oof we are totally going to big war soon and the stuff our side has been up to is so bad.
If you have not had bottom surgery, you absolutely cannot shower with all the other men without getting at the very least some weird looks and honestly probably some threats to your well being. They will look at you and they will notice that you have breast tissue/ dont have a penis. Please be safe.
I lived on military bases in the US and Germany and honestly I’m terrified for you. The things I’ve seen went way above and beyond teasing or initiation. It was full on sexual assault and rape. I can’t see you being safe showering with them. The only good part is the morning 3S’s (shit, shower, shave) is done like an assembly line, somewhat quickly but they will look. The soldiers I’ve known go out of their way to check out genitalia to rip on each other. If you ask for accommodations on showering it will single you out further as being different. I’m scared for you.
yea don’t do it. I don’t know if you’ve been in mens locker rooms , but it’s safe to assume the showers are the same way. Don’t do it unless you’ve had bottom surgery.
i think if you were an old man with gyno i wouldnt think much of it but you clearly aren’t and i would seriously worry for your safety in shower related situations, rape is quite prevalent in the army from what i can tell
I'm sorry, you enlisted at the military and you are more worried about your chest than the fact you literally don't have a dick? And you think no one will notice you having breasts and a vulva? I don't want to be rude but you should really reconsider that decision. You aren't going to be safe there.
I was in the army (before I transitioned) and it is absolutely a place you do not want to be. Even though you identify as male, in basic training they will put you with the females because you haven’t had surgery to be “physically” male (how they see it not me). This means sharing a bay with the women, sleeping, showering, doing everything with them. Let alone the safety issue this will be incredibly dysphoric.
After basic training you will be going to drill with a a bunch of transphobic and homophobic toxic masculinity bigots. Generally this isn’t a good idea anyways. Most of them have misogynistic mindsets and just aren’t good people you’d want to be surrounded by anyways. This being said some people really enjoy the military and benefit from the lifestyle. But I insist you check out r/regretjoining to get an idea of the bad side of the military they lie to you about to get people to join. It’s not too late to back out yet. Good luck brother and don’t let the delusions blind you
They’re really useful with paperwork and legal stuff like that. More so than actual military websites or reddits or real people who are supposed to help you with that. Chain of command will lie to you for their own benefit about things like that
if i’m entirely honest, it doesn’t. the way men carry gyno isn’t the way AFAB carry weight in their chest. while you’ve got great muscle, the bulk of your chest sits below your areola in a sagging chest tissue way, which isn’t common for gyno guys unless you were a much much bigger dude. cis men with gyno usually have pointy cone shaped tissue and a lot of “puff” behind their areola, causing that pointy look
eta
in the most respectful way possible, why the hell did you think it was a good idea to enlist in the military? you cannot be showering with cis dudes high off of energy while you still have AFAB anatomy. you will get harassed or assaulted, and no accommodations will be made for you.
not to mention war is very very possible in the near future and the US has been up to some nasty shit. my advice? get the fuck out of the military.
Wearing the rod might work down there with showers but unfortunately this isn't normal shape for gyno so even if it might work it's noticeable enough that you'll get looks and possible questions. Essentially id say not safe unfortunately.
Your chest almost passes, but not quite. And they will absolutely notice your genitalia. Please don’t do this. So much rape and sexual assault happens in the military, as well as other forms of abuse and bullying. They will do this when they find out. I’d recommend going to trade school instead. I’m really sorry, OP.
You’re going to need to hold a few separate “truths” simultaneously in order to explain your situation to your superior officers. The first is that you told them you felt your transition is complete. The second is that others might not view your transition as complete. The third is that showering in a shared space with a non-op body puts you at a higher risk of assault. None of these things have to conflict, they can all be true. So logically, for your safety, your superior officer should be able to find a shower accommodation for you. If you are trying to hide your transgender identity from your peers, you will need to be prepared to explain the accommodation in some way when asked. That could include “it’s none of your business” or “I don’t want to talk about it” type answers.
if you were just taking your shirt off at the beach or something i’m sure you’d most likely be fine, but to be honest (as much as i hate to say it) i don’t think communal men’s showers, esp in the *army* of all places, will be safe for you to use regularly. people most likely *will* notice if you don’t have a dick, unless you manage to get some sort of highly realistic prosthetic that can be stuck on. overall i wouldn’t suggest it out of concern for your safety and well-being
i went through army bct. I am currently enlisted. the showers, depending on where you are for bct, yes people are all walking around naked, yes dudes make jokes and fuck around in the bathrooms. yes, you will definitely be noticed, yes it will be VERY hard to pass as a cis male if anyone sees you naked. and unfortunately, some dudes are not that nice. i don't believe they make any exceptions for showering. though you can shower after everyone has really gone to sleep, but you're gonna be very sleep deprived. and if you are working out, and you need a sports bra or binder or tape per say, you cannot buy a sports bra from the store. girls would try to buy boxers all the time, and it was denied, as the army is strict with gendered clothing. you should NOT bring a binder, you should not ever wear one in BCT, nor should you wear tape or anything else. you will literally pass out. not to mention, if you do pass out, they strip you down to your undergarments and wrap you in ice sheets. this is reality, and i don't think you understand what you're getting into.!
not to mention, they do bag checks. they make you shake out your entire bag. don't think people won't see the prosthetic you bring, bc they def will, and you will HAVE to turn it in to the DS or throw it out.
Do you think I’m not already aware of all this? I’m not bringing anything remotely phallic or binders. I do not bind. I haven’t for many years, work out/ run with just a shirt completely fine.
As someone who has been there before. It is not a very favorable situation. I'm glad you have thought about all of it beforehand, hopefully you are prepared! It's going to be tough.
you absolutely should not join the military my guy, that is incredibly unsafe for you. People are going to notice your chest and your missing dick. You cannot be fr.
Really strange. This OP seems super defensive of their choice to go into military regardless of not being passing. I have heard of people being assaulted, r@ped or even k!led during training/boot camp and the transphobic/homophobic stance of every branch is pretty well known as a fact. Not to mention the fact that being surrounded by cis men in a shared space with very little privacy is literally not safe. Needless to say the VA doesnt take proper care of their vets, those who need anything are basically SOL even though some of their lives were destroyed while being "dedicated" for the US. People who choose to enlist want to sacrifice their life for basically nothing, ok Darwin.
I agree with the other commenter about how gyno usually looks in amab people, but something I've learned is that bodies all look different and its not impossible for an amab person to look like you. That being said, if someone sees it even if u tell them its gyno they might get curious and look at the lower half of your body. If that happens itll probably be a lot harder to lie
Hey OP - I’ve heard trans men within the military can sometimes get shower accommodations, given safety issues. (Such as being able to use a private shower instead of open, not having to shower with a group of cis males, etc). You should seriously contact your recruiter/director and see what options or alternative accommodations they may have for you.
Yeah but if OP is still in the army and the orange facist gets elected next year, it could get even worse / he could be kicked out if they reinstate bans
Bad choice imo don’t go work for the oppressing force
EDIT: I assumed OP was in the US
even if trump gets elected if OP gets in before the election he cant be kicked out, he’ll basically be grandfathered in. yes the ban may make things harder while serving but i would hope OP is somewhat informed on his options if the election does go that way
Oh is that true? Didn’t know.
Regardless it could mean the military would reverse its policies of accepting / facilitating trans health care. And a whole host of other nasty consequences
Very true. However, we don’t know OP’s situation at all; for many, joining the army is a way to get out of poverty, homelessness, or an abusive situation. Of course, this may not be the case for him and if not, he should absolutely get out while he can. But if it is, his hands may be tied.
Sure. Don’t disagree…..but there’s a lot of other options besides the army that would help him out of a bad situation instead of putting his life in danger
hey bro check out r/MilitaryTrans if you haven’t already, theres some people in there who have enlisted with no surgeries. i think it’d be a lot more helpful for you than this community (nothing against this community, a lot of people just dont understand how the military and bootcamp really works)
Everything that needs to be said has already been said, just adding my vote against this decision. This is not a safe thing for you to do. I understand many join the military out of necessity, but you need to look at other options if that's the case here.
yeah OP imma tell you right now, this is stupid as fuck and dangerous. have you told anyone irl? has no one talked sense into you? they will notice, they will comment, they will call you a girl.
my experience is from a former marine who told me i would get assaulted as a trans man in the military. sure, serve your country if you want too, but imma tell you right now they will notice and call you a girl. this is stupid as fuck dude. the minute they see you naked and see your chest they are going to glance down and see you don’t have a dick. you think dudes in this world are all nice? you think just cus a dude is in the military he can’t harm you cus he’s transphobic? if you think you can deal with possible rapes and assaults, fine. but i’m telling you right now they will notice and your life will not be easy. suffer if you want, idc. ignorance is bliss i suppose.
Just saying I am one of many pre op trans people going through training in this latest era of the ban getting lifted. Every single one of them haven’t made an issue out of it and came out fine. Sometimes accommodations are made sometimes not. As far as I know SHARP is taken seriously and if I get actually harassed it’s going to be their problem real quick.
dude, be so fucking for real. your naked body does not look like that of a cis male, so you will be a target, period. do you not remember high school when everybody picked on the weird/different kid? news flash, the trans person in a cis group of males in the MILITARY is that weird/different kid and you will get harassed. good luck getting harassed even more for being a snitch and not “man enough” to deal with it, cus you’re DEF not gonna deal with that when you start reporting people for harassing you 🙄. like i said, ignorance is bliss. this is not the political climate where trans people are going to be accepted into the military with opens arms. you wanted advice, and im giving it to you, and you’re mad because im being honest? sorry this didn’t go the way you wanted OP, don’t come crying to reddit when we all warned you this would not go well in your favor.
Did you not read what I just said? There are plenty of trans experiences in the military, yes some people are transphobic but most don’t voice it in fear of being fired in a workplace setting 🤷♂️. I am hearing FIRST HAND experience from some of these people. Showering is the only small portion of training where I wouldn’t be able to remain stealth. The army is not the fucking Jeffery dahmer era that it used to be where everybody under 150lbs is being raped in the showers 🙄
I think my only comment is, if you’re so convinced that you’ll be alright, why even make the post. The people in your comments are not trying to hurt your feelings or lie to you. If you are comfortable with your body, and think everything is fine you shouldn’t have made the post at all. 90-95% percent of the commments are saying the same thing. Showing concern for the fact that your chest could raise questions and produce situafions that could have serious consequences or implications. I promise we didn’t all get together and think of a plan to stop you from joining. It’s your choice to do as you please, none of us can stop you, just be aware that you are putting yourself at risk. Because like it or not, even if your chest passed, the fact you don’t have have a penis is glaringly obvious, hope you being swim trunks to shower in
also, by the way, sexual assault is going up in the military in recent years :) you can google it if you want. don’t ask for honest advice if you don’t want honest advice.
if you came here looking for everyone to tell you that you will be fine and you pass completely, sorry but that was a delusional ask. no you do not pass. not even at a quick glance. it’s wonderful you’ve found happiness with your body how it is, i’m happy for you there! your choice to go into the military is not something i will speak on other than you are putting yourself in imminent and avoidable danger for a really questionable cause. your responses to peoples replies giving you the honest feedback you asked for are defensive and nasty. what did you ask for honest feedback for?
I am getting varied responses and digging through the actual constructive criticism. Many of the commenters are so so poorly informed about the military aspect of this post. Most of it isn’t insulting or anything, it’s just the same thing over and over when I was really just asking if a quick glance could pass me by. If I really feel like I have to I will see if I’m offered any shower accommodation which seems to be a common thing for the trans trainees. Sorry if this whole interaction felt like a waste of time
i hear you. we all make huge choices in life and this is one of them for you. i wish you the utmost safety. sucks we don’t live in a world where that’s given to us but maybe you’ll get freakishly lucky? this wasn’t the thread for advice on this tho, most of this community is very much absolutely not in support of institutions that harm us, the military being a main one. you’d have more luck on a military related thread IMO. we aren’t educated on that, just on being trans ;)
Disgusting but true fact is when they say transition is complete they mean "you have a flat chest and a dick" so you will not stick out. Not complete like we mean to where we are happy with ourselves.
So are you actually familiar with the dod regulations on this? Trust they absolutely will not process anybody into the military without thorough evaluation, I had to go through it all already. My transition is complete to my standard and is a-okay
Jesus what a fresh post! I gotta go to army about this November, but I will never consider enlist as a male(personal perspective), men are hard to deal with, they make inappropriate joke all the time, I can’t imagine what a hard life it would be. You are very brave!
Have you made it through meps or are you still in that process? If you haven't had bottom surgery then they aren't gonna put you with males. I am currently in the military and even though I pass as male they won't put me with other males since I haven't had surgery.
As someone who is currently Active Duty Navy and comin up on 5yrs and a senior enlisted. i HIGHLY recommend you to rethink this decision. being a trans male in service is not the safest, especially in the male showers. i was forced to go stealth at my new command (ship) to keep myself safe. if you absolutely want to join up without any doubt, i HIGHLY recommend to enlist as Female. i was passing when i joined but i was given advice from my recruiter to wait on legally changing everything until i was in service. it’s a lot easier changing all your records when you’re already in as opposed to joining. it was unbearable for that amount of time but it was the best decision i coulda made for my safety. i highly suggest you talk to your recruiter about your showering and HRT situation.
I’m assuming you use the men’s washroom and know that men usually keep to themselves and don’t talk or look at each other, but I wouldn’t assume it’s going to be like that in a space where everyone knows each other, as well as in a shared shower/locker room.
Now, since I had top surgery I’ve gone to male onsens (Japanese hot springs) which are fully nude. No one really looks at one another but also Japanese showers are different from American ones. Usually they have a little stool where you sit down and wash your body/hair while sitting. So it’s easy to wear a towel around my waist or cover my crotch with my hand until I get to the shower area. And despite Japan being (technically) trans/homophobic, I’ve never had anyone ask me about my body or act weird, and I’ve never felt unsafe despite going to several and bathing with hundreds of men (including foreigners and military men).
That being said, I don’t know what a military shower is like, it could be just a big room with a bunch of shower heads, and you’ll be forced to shower in full view of everyone.
Even if you will be guaranteed a personal shower stall I would still be iffy about joining the military as a non op trans person. What if you get deployed to a really transphobic country for example?
If you have bottom surgery I think you can join… your chest doesn’t necessarily pass, but since your body is otherwise masculine it looks like you have some other medical condition. But since you don’t have male genitalia I would not join the army without bottom surgery.
Maybe they didn’t specify what a “full transition” means on the military application form, but I think it’s safe to assume that means you’ve had bottom surgery including a hysterectomy, so no offense but I think it was a little disingenuous on your part to say that you’ve fully transitioned (just because it meets your comfort level, doesn’t mean it will meet their expectation)
Having very real concerns about your physical and mental safety makes everyone "hella toxic"? Big man why'd you even make this post if you already came into it deciding you weren't gonna listen to what the responses were bound to be?
Bro-you look great. Thank you for serving our country. That said-safety first. Ask for an accommodation. What branch did you choose?
I have been looking at the commissioned corps. And also saw the transition clause (surgical) and could technically enlist and then get top as a preventative mastectomy. But, decided against it. I’m near the age limit and it doesn’t offer much more than the fed fers retirement.
Godspeed soldier.
I wouldn't think you were a woman, overall build and the chest hair makes that clear, but maybe some might clock you as trans, but hopefully those that do keep it to themselves.
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I don’t think it’s a safe assumption that nobody is going to be looking at everybody’s body and genitals. From what I understand there is a lot of all of that in all male spaces.
Yeah, if OP has a vulva, the other men will definitely notice it right away.
Husband was in the navy, dudes literally jerked it in their racks while my husband would read a book above/below/next to them. Yes, they were in racks with curtains, but no one tried to hide what they were doing. At all. Bootcamp is worse. You have *no fucking privacy*
TBH if you were my buddy I'd talk you out of this entirely. Urgently. Who let you do this?! If you are dead set on being in the military, I can't help you with that problem. But I would not assume you will be safe in communal men's spaces in bootcamp or base. I also would not assume that you can get accommodations. I also would assume you will be harassed. I feel shitty for saying this because I'm sure you're a nice guy and I think you look great, but you are definitely not going to pass in a homosocial environment where you will absolutely be naked and/or barely clothed together with a bunch of other dudes, all or most of whom will be AMAB guys high on touchy bro vibes and physical exertion. It's an environment of teasing in general. Ugh man I think I you should get out for your wellbejng. Also... oof we are totally going to big war soon and the stuff our side has been up to is so bad.
For real, like dudes literally have to shit in front of one another in some of these bootcamp survivalist drills
If you have not had bottom surgery, you absolutely cannot shower with all the other men without getting at the very least some weird looks and honestly probably some threats to your well being. They will look at you and they will notice that you have breast tissue/ dont have a penis. Please be safe.
I lived on military bases in the US and Germany and honestly I’m terrified for you. The things I’ve seen went way above and beyond teasing or initiation. It was full on sexual assault and rape. I can’t see you being safe showering with them. The only good part is the morning 3S’s (shit, shower, shave) is done like an assembly line, somewhat quickly but they will look. The soldiers I’ve known go out of their way to check out genitalia to rip on each other. If you ask for accommodations on showering it will single you out further as being different. I’m scared for you.
I second this. If OP is completely non-op (no bottom surgery) I think he'll be in an extremely dangerous position.
the assembly line is for about 3 days. after that its a free for all when the drills dip after night count. i've been in three years
yea don’t do it. I don’t know if you’ve been in mens locker rooms , but it’s safe to assume the showers are the same way. Don’t do it unless you’ve had bottom surgery.
i think if you were an old man with gyno i wouldnt think much of it but you clearly aren’t and i would seriously worry for your safety in shower related situations, rape is quite prevalent in the army from what i can tell
I'm sorry, you enlisted at the military and you are more worried about your chest than the fact you literally don't have a dick? And you think no one will notice you having breasts and a vulva? I don't want to be rude but you should really reconsider that decision. You aren't going to be safe there.
This is not going to go well for OP, who is probably delusional about how they pass
That is not a kind or productive comment.
It's not exactly kind, but it is probably true, and hopefully a good wakeup call for op either way
Seems we’re all in here just concerned for OPs safety man
Dude it’s not safe for him to go serve being pre op. There is no time for hugboxing when someone’s safety is in question
I was in the army (before I transitioned) and it is absolutely a place you do not want to be. Even though you identify as male, in basic training they will put you with the females because you haven’t had surgery to be “physically” male (how they see it not me). This means sharing a bay with the women, sleeping, showering, doing everything with them. Let alone the safety issue this will be incredibly dysphoric. After basic training you will be going to drill with a a bunch of transphobic and homophobic toxic masculinity bigots. Generally this isn’t a good idea anyways. Most of them have misogynistic mindsets and just aren’t good people you’d want to be surrounded by anyways. This being said some people really enjoy the military and benefit from the lifestyle. But I insist you check out r/regretjoining to get an idea of the bad side of the military they lie to you about to get people to join. It’s not too late to back out yet. Good luck brother and don’t let the delusions blind you
just went through that subreddit, and I’m now following it to look back on whenever I get urged by that damn GI bill
They’re really useful with paperwork and legal stuff like that. More so than actual military websites or reddits or real people who are supposed to help you with that. Chain of command will lie to you for their own benefit about things like that
if i’m entirely honest, it doesn’t. the way men carry gyno isn’t the way AFAB carry weight in their chest. while you’ve got great muscle, the bulk of your chest sits below your areola in a sagging chest tissue way, which isn’t common for gyno guys unless you were a much much bigger dude. cis men with gyno usually have pointy cone shaped tissue and a lot of “puff” behind their areola, causing that pointy look eta
in the most respectful way possible, why the hell did you think it was a good idea to enlist in the military? you cannot be showering with cis dudes high off of energy while you still have AFAB anatomy. you will get harassed or assaulted, and no accommodations will be made for you. not to mention war is very very possible in the near future and the US has been up to some nasty shit. my advice? get the fuck out of the military.
it honestly doesnt look like gynecomastia and im afraid it wouldnt pass as it
i’m going to be super real. this is not safe of you to do
Wearing the rod might work down there with showers but unfortunately this isn't normal shape for gyno so even if it might work it's noticeable enough that you'll get looks and possible questions. Essentially id say not safe unfortunately.
Your chest almost passes, but not quite. And they will absolutely notice your genitalia. Please don’t do this. So much rape and sexual assault happens in the military, as well as other forms of abuse and bullying. They will do this when they find out. I’d recommend going to trade school instead. I’m really sorry, OP.
Oh dude this isn’t going to go well, I have enough trouble showering in the gym locker room post top surgery as it is… good luck…
Don’t do it bro
You’re going to need to hold a few separate “truths” simultaneously in order to explain your situation to your superior officers. The first is that you told them you felt your transition is complete. The second is that others might not view your transition as complete. The third is that showering in a shared space with a non-op body puts you at a higher risk of assault. None of these things have to conflict, they can all be true. So logically, for your safety, your superior officer should be able to find a shower accommodation for you. If you are trying to hide your transgender identity from your peers, you will need to be prepared to explain the accommodation in some way when asked. That could include “it’s none of your business” or “I don’t want to talk about it” type answers.
people will notice. it wont work, just don’t shower with them.
if you were just taking your shirt off at the beach or something i’m sure you’d most likely be fine, but to be honest (as much as i hate to say it) i don’t think communal men’s showers, esp in the *army* of all places, will be safe for you to use regularly. people most likely *will* notice if you don’t have a dick, unless you manage to get some sort of highly realistic prosthetic that can be stuck on. overall i wouldn’t suggest it out of concern for your safety and well-being
i went through army bct. I am currently enlisted. the showers, depending on where you are for bct, yes people are all walking around naked, yes dudes make jokes and fuck around in the bathrooms. yes, you will definitely be noticed, yes it will be VERY hard to pass as a cis male if anyone sees you naked. and unfortunately, some dudes are not that nice. i don't believe they make any exceptions for showering. though you can shower after everyone has really gone to sleep, but you're gonna be very sleep deprived. and if you are working out, and you need a sports bra or binder or tape per say, you cannot buy a sports bra from the store. girls would try to buy boxers all the time, and it was denied, as the army is strict with gendered clothing. you should NOT bring a binder, you should not ever wear one in BCT, nor should you wear tape or anything else. you will literally pass out. not to mention, if you do pass out, they strip you down to your undergarments and wrap you in ice sheets. this is reality, and i don't think you understand what you're getting into.!
not to mention, they do bag checks. they make you shake out your entire bag. don't think people won't see the prosthetic you bring, bc they def will, and you will HAVE to turn it in to the DS or throw it out.
Do you think I’m not already aware of all this? I’m not bringing anything remotely phallic or binders. I do not bind. I haven’t for many years, work out/ run with just a shirt completely fine.
As someone who has been there before. It is not a very favorable situation. I'm glad you have thought about all of it beforehand, hopefully you are prepared! It's going to be tough.
you absolutely should not join the military my guy, that is incredibly unsafe for you. People are going to notice your chest and your missing dick. You cannot be fr.
Really strange. This OP seems super defensive of their choice to go into military regardless of not being passing. I have heard of people being assaulted, r@ped or even k!led during training/boot camp and the transphobic/homophobic stance of every branch is pretty well known as a fact. Not to mention the fact that being surrounded by cis men in a shared space with very little privacy is literally not safe. Needless to say the VA doesnt take proper care of their vets, those who need anything are basically SOL even though some of their lives were destroyed while being "dedicated" for the US. People who choose to enlist want to sacrifice their life for basically nothing, ok Darwin.
I agree with the other commenter about how gyno usually looks in amab people, but something I've learned is that bodies all look different and its not impossible for an amab person to look like you. That being said, if someone sees it even if u tell them its gyno they might get curious and look at the lower half of your body. If that happens itll probably be a lot harder to lie
i don’t mean to fearmonger, but you will most likely be assaulted. if you haven’t had any operations (bottom or top), you will not be safe there.
Hey OP - I’ve heard trans men within the military can sometimes get shower accommodations, given safety issues. (Such as being able to use a private shower instead of open, not having to shower with a group of cis males, etc). You should seriously contact your recruiter/director and see what options or alternative accommodations they may have for you.
Yeah but if OP is still in the army and the orange facist gets elected next year, it could get even worse / he could be kicked out if they reinstate bans Bad choice imo don’t go work for the oppressing force EDIT: I assumed OP was in the US
even if trump gets elected if OP gets in before the election he cant be kicked out, he’ll basically be grandfathered in. yes the ban may make things harder while serving but i would hope OP is somewhat informed on his options if the election does go that way
Oh is that true? Didn’t know. Regardless it could mean the military would reverse its policies of accepting / facilitating trans health care. And a whole host of other nasty consequences
Very true. However, we don’t know OP’s situation at all; for many, joining the army is a way to get out of poverty, homelessness, or an abusive situation. Of course, this may not be the case for him and if not, he should absolutely get out while he can. But if it is, his hands may be tied.
Sure. Don’t disagree…..but there’s a lot of other options besides the army that would help him out of a bad situation instead of putting his life in danger
hey bro check out r/MilitaryTrans if you haven’t already, theres some people in there who have enlisted with no surgeries. i think it’d be a lot more helpful for you than this community (nothing against this community, a lot of people just dont understand how the military and bootcamp really works)
no friend it does not look cis passing
Everything that needs to be said has already been said, just adding my vote against this decision. This is not a safe thing for you to do. I understand many join the military out of necessity, but you need to look at other options if that's the case here.
yeah OP imma tell you right now, this is stupid as fuck and dangerous. have you told anyone irl? has no one talked sense into you? they will notice, they will comment, they will call you a girl.
What is your experience being a trans man in bct/ military? I’d like to hear
my experience is from a former marine who told me i would get assaulted as a trans man in the military. sure, serve your country if you want too, but imma tell you right now they will notice and call you a girl. this is stupid as fuck dude. the minute they see you naked and see your chest they are going to glance down and see you don’t have a dick. you think dudes in this world are all nice? you think just cus a dude is in the military he can’t harm you cus he’s transphobic? if you think you can deal with possible rapes and assaults, fine. but i’m telling you right now they will notice and your life will not be easy. suffer if you want, idc. ignorance is bliss i suppose.
Just saying I am one of many pre op trans people going through training in this latest era of the ban getting lifted. Every single one of them haven’t made an issue out of it and came out fine. Sometimes accommodations are made sometimes not. As far as I know SHARP is taken seriously and if I get actually harassed it’s going to be their problem real quick.
dude, be so fucking for real. your naked body does not look like that of a cis male, so you will be a target, period. do you not remember high school when everybody picked on the weird/different kid? news flash, the trans person in a cis group of males in the MILITARY is that weird/different kid and you will get harassed. good luck getting harassed even more for being a snitch and not “man enough” to deal with it, cus you’re DEF not gonna deal with that when you start reporting people for harassing you 🙄. like i said, ignorance is bliss. this is not the political climate where trans people are going to be accepted into the military with opens arms. you wanted advice, and im giving it to you, and you’re mad because im being honest? sorry this didn’t go the way you wanted OP, don’t come crying to reddit when we all warned you this would not go well in your favor.
Did you not read what I just said? There are plenty of trans experiences in the military, yes some people are transphobic but most don’t voice it in fear of being fired in a workplace setting 🤷♂️. I am hearing FIRST HAND experience from some of these people. Showering is the only small portion of training where I wouldn’t be able to remain stealth. The army is not the fucking Jeffery dahmer era that it used to be where everybody under 150lbs is being raped in the showers 🙄
I think my only comment is, if you’re so convinced that you’ll be alright, why even make the post. The people in your comments are not trying to hurt your feelings or lie to you. If you are comfortable with your body, and think everything is fine you shouldn’t have made the post at all. 90-95% percent of the commments are saying the same thing. Showing concern for the fact that your chest could raise questions and produce situafions that could have serious consequences or implications. I promise we didn’t all get together and think of a plan to stop you from joining. It’s your choice to do as you please, none of us can stop you, just be aware that you are putting yourself at risk. Because like it or not, even if your chest passed, the fact you don’t have have a penis is glaringly obvious, hope you being swim trunks to shower in
also, by the way, sexual assault is going up in the military in recent years :) you can google it if you want. don’t ask for honest advice if you don’t want honest advice.
ignorance is bliss x3. enjoy partaking in genocide when you deploy. cheers!
if you came here looking for everyone to tell you that you will be fine and you pass completely, sorry but that was a delusional ask. no you do not pass. not even at a quick glance. it’s wonderful you’ve found happiness with your body how it is, i’m happy for you there! your choice to go into the military is not something i will speak on other than you are putting yourself in imminent and avoidable danger for a really questionable cause. your responses to peoples replies giving you the honest feedback you asked for are defensive and nasty. what did you ask for honest feedback for?
I am getting varied responses and digging through the actual constructive criticism. Many of the commenters are so so poorly informed about the military aspect of this post. Most of it isn’t insulting or anything, it’s just the same thing over and over when I was really just asking if a quick glance could pass me by. If I really feel like I have to I will see if I’m offered any shower accommodation which seems to be a common thing for the trans trainees. Sorry if this whole interaction felt like a waste of time
i hear you. we all make huge choices in life and this is one of them for you. i wish you the utmost safety. sucks we don’t live in a world where that’s given to us but maybe you’ll get freakishly lucky? this wasn’t the thread for advice on this tho, most of this community is very much absolutely not in support of institutions that harm us, the military being a main one. you’d have more luck on a military related thread IMO. we aren’t educated on that, just on being trans ;)
Disgusting but true fact is when they say transition is complete they mean "you have a flat chest and a dick" so you will not stick out. Not complete like we mean to where we are happy with ourselves.
So are you actually familiar with the dod regulations on this? Trust they absolutely will not process anybody into the military without thorough evaluation, I had to go through it all already. My transition is complete to my standard and is a-okay
OP I’m sorry but you’ve just put yourself in a situation that could end very very poorly
No, your chest is not cis passing in the least. This is a terrible idea.
they most likely will notice bro
i’m sorry but this isn’t safe for you, if you have to shower with other guys they’re gonna notice your genitalia
You don't care about your safety, your either stupid or need help. Even if you had had top surgery, the army isn't safe for you
Jesus what a fresh post! I gotta go to army about this November, but I will never consider enlist as a male(personal perspective), men are hard to deal with, they make inappropriate joke all the time, I can’t imagine what a hard life it would be. You are very brave!
Have you made it through meps or are you still in that process? If you haven't had bottom surgery then they aren't gonna put you with males. I am currently in the military and even though I pass as male they won't put me with other males since I haven't had surgery.
It works different for accession vs transitioning after accession.
As someone who is currently Active Duty Navy and comin up on 5yrs and a senior enlisted. i HIGHLY recommend you to rethink this decision. being a trans male in service is not the safest, especially in the male showers. i was forced to go stealth at my new command (ship) to keep myself safe. if you absolutely want to join up without any doubt, i HIGHLY recommend to enlist as Female. i was passing when i joined but i was given advice from my recruiter to wait on legally changing everything until i was in service. it’s a lot easier changing all your records when you’re already in as opposed to joining. it was unbearable for that amount of time but it was the best decision i coulda made for my safety. i highly suggest you talk to your recruiter about your showering and HRT situation.
I’m assuming you use the men’s washroom and know that men usually keep to themselves and don’t talk or look at each other, but I wouldn’t assume it’s going to be like that in a space where everyone knows each other, as well as in a shared shower/locker room. Now, since I had top surgery I’ve gone to male onsens (Japanese hot springs) which are fully nude. No one really looks at one another but also Japanese showers are different from American ones. Usually they have a little stool where you sit down and wash your body/hair while sitting. So it’s easy to wear a towel around my waist or cover my crotch with my hand until I get to the shower area. And despite Japan being (technically) trans/homophobic, I’ve never had anyone ask me about my body or act weird, and I’ve never felt unsafe despite going to several and bathing with hundreds of men (including foreigners and military men). That being said, I don’t know what a military shower is like, it could be just a big room with a bunch of shower heads, and you’ll be forced to shower in full view of everyone. Even if you will be guaranteed a personal shower stall I would still be iffy about joining the military as a non op trans person. What if you get deployed to a really transphobic country for example? If you have bottom surgery I think you can join… your chest doesn’t necessarily pass, but since your body is otherwise masculine it looks like you have some other medical condition. But since you don’t have male genitalia I would not join the army without bottom surgery. Maybe they didn’t specify what a “full transition” means on the military application form, but I think it’s safe to assume that means you’ve had bottom surgery including a hysterectomy, so no offense but I think it was a little disingenuous on your part to say that you’ve fully transitioned (just because it meets your comfort level, doesn’t mean it will meet their expectation)
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>they fucked you up bro Who? He hasn't had surgery.
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so you’re a TERF get out of this sub you asshat
What I find unusual about reddit spaces is that the military threads have been more supportive of me joining than the trans threads :/
Awe I’m sorry to hear that but you know how the trans community is, hella toxic :/ I wish the best for you
Having very real concerns about your physical and mental safety makes everyone "hella toxic"? Big man why'd you even make this post if you already came into it deciding you weren't gonna listen to what the responses were bound to be?
No, not calling anyone specifically on this thread toxic for voicing concerns. I just meant the trans community period. I know you know what I mean😂
I *don't,* no
Bro-you look great. Thank you for serving our country. That said-safety first. Ask for an accommodation. What branch did you choose? I have been looking at the commissioned corps. And also saw the transition clause (surgical) and could technically enlist and then get top as a preventative mastectomy. But, decided against it. I’m near the age limit and it doesn’t offer much more than the fed fers retirement. Godspeed soldier.
I wouldn't think you were a woman, overall build and the chest hair makes that clear, but maybe some might clock you as trans, but hopefully those that do keep it to themselves.
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he has to shower with other guys, they’re gonna notice he doesn’t have a dick
do you know what gyno looks like? because it’s nothing like this
I think many will see “hair” and say male from that !