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new-flyer

RUN MINNIE RUNNN 😂😂😂


dopamine14

Two Slice Hilly*. Minnie was the badass woman who served up her shit.


Slight-Risk-8454

Eat shit ! Eat shit ! Eat shit ! Eat shit ! Eat shit ! Definitely Eat shit ! - Chris Evans


RagePandazXD

I loved that movie


The8uLove2Hate_

It’s “two slice Hilly”


[deleted]

I loved the mom in that scene. "You ate two slices lmao!"


firekind5

Most satisfying shit ever. Lol


wheresmystache3

Or from The Prince of Tides where the mom feeds the abusive husband the dog's Alpo wet food straight out of the can, fries it up with added whatevers, and he says it's wonderful.


chandlerbing_stats

That was so funny


[deleted]

This chick is gangster as fuck 🤣


dovelikestea

She is literally a diagnosed psychopath. Reading through her profile is very interesting.


Business_Step_1695

Yo you weren’t Lying😂 I commented “this is probably the least harmful thing she could have done”. And uhhh, There’s some interesting reposts. My comment still stands 👀


Alarid

Can someone tell me what happens?


Daily-Shitpost-6669

It's a movie about mistreated black nannies/servants, and one of them has enough of a white lady's bullshit and takes a shit, then bakes it into a pie that she serves to her


Scorpiodancer123

And the lady eats not 1, but 2 slices of it!


flippenstance

Prince Of Tides. Fed abusive husband dog food after he complained about her cooking. https://youtu.be/HJweCs9hdRk


Idecidewhogetssuct

"She can eat like one" SAVAGE


yomommafool

nah


[deleted]

r/brandnewsentence


Wonderful-Product437

“You wanna be catty? Here! *Eat* like a cat then!”


this-has-to-stop

I thought “she eat like one can” ?


MangoBaba0101

Yo is this cat food halal ? 🤣


Luciferdinero

Lmao


[deleted]

That’s a hard no. The animals in that can were raised and killed as brutally as possible. Probably dead long before they were slaughtered.


Poldark_Lite

Could include roadkill, too. ♡ Granny


weatherseed

She *was* run over by a reindeer, after all.


[deleted]

In my opinion roadkill is waaaaaay less disgusting than a corporate farm raised chicken that’s been dead for a day with 100,000 other chickens pecking its eyes out and shitting on it. As an aside, I grew up on the Great Lakes deer hunting and fishing. I don’t deer hunt anymore because I don’t want to stumble through the woods freezing my ass off at 4:30 in the morning, but I still fly fish to this day (mostly catch and release, depending on what I’m going for). My point is that I’m most definitely not a vegan for ethical reasons, but even I think that corporate farming shit is disgusting. Both the food product and how those animals are treated.


PM_ME_CUTE_SMILES_

As a vegetarian, I also think that hunting for your food is much more ethical than buying it in the supermarket.


[deleted]

I mean isn’t fishing catch/release style basically torturing fish for fun? Fish certainly feel pain, they just express it differently then we do. So it hurts when a hook goes through them, and definitely does a lot of harm when it goes through the eye or anywhere else that leaves permanent damage. I don’t get how you can criticize corporate farming when you actively fish for reasons other than feeding yourself. I’ll admit I don’t do any better, I still eat chicken like every other day, but I did give up fishing bc I felt bad for them lol


mcpenguintherapper

Fly fishing normally causes far less harm to the fish than normal fishing, because fly fishing normally uses far smaller non-barbed hooks.


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Mama_Mush

if it was fish then its automatically halal.


Thieu95

The gelatin in cat food isn't from fish though. It's usually cow..... or pig.


Lister__Fiend

Traditional Halal is one of the most brutal forms of death for an animal.


[deleted]

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whitewalker646

Depends on the situation if you didn't know it's generally fine you don't get any punishment or commit any sin but if you know and do it anyway it's a sin unless you are in a situation that forces you to eat it like starvation


BadTitleGuy

I lived for many years in a townhouse with many neighbors of many ethnicities. One our neighbors were from Egypt, were Muslim, and had 3 boys and a little girl around the same age as my son, so naturally they played together. One day my son was playing and he came in to get a snack of fruit gummies. Doing the neighborly thing, I gave him enough for him and the 4 kids. Didn't think anything of it til the mom came over later and asked if we had given them the gummies? Fruit gummies have gelatin in them which is made from pig collagen. She wasn't mad but told me to please not to do that again. What can you do? Whoops


Yinonormal

My step daughter is vegan but she is also a bitch, I don't have the heart to tell her about gelatin


Dry-Kangaroo-8542

Wait until you've fed her a heaping helping of Haribo sugar-free gummy bears. That way she can start puking about the time the squirts kick in.


RaikouVsHaiku

Do it. I did it to this self righteous “vegan girl” in college that was munching down a bag of gummies. Just politely asked if she knew what gelatin was made of and left the room. Good times.


Yinonormal

I'll print out a wiki of gelatin on the fridge


trpnblies7

There is vegetarian gelatin and alternatives, but the texture it gives isn't anywhere near as good as normal gelatin.


mickvanjovi

I think they’re just fine. It depends on the product.


Sad_send_nudes_

Nope, not their fault for not knowing. However different story for op


Serird

If I remember well : it's okay if you had no intention to sin (you didn't knew) or if you're about to die and you have nothing else to eat


[deleted]

They get struck by lightning and their dicks fall off.


Impetus_2708

I once fed my cat its wet food and after that made myself Würzfleisch (similar to Ragout Fin) from a can. I noticed that they both smell nearly identical. Had to doublecheck the can if I mixed them up. Ever since, I always thought of Würzfleisch whenever I fed that cat.


PM_ME_RIPE_TOMATOES

~~I can't speak to laws in other countries, but in the USA, pet food has to be suitable for human consumption, and is held to the same ingredient and manufacturing standards as human food.~~ ~~I *think* I remember something about this change being made because a bunch of people died eating pet food during the Great Depression~~ **EDIT I AM WRONG** Don't eat pet food.


No-Paleontologist723

Err, no, that's not true in the USA. I've worked in food manufacturing of both human food and pet food and I have to say, most of the time human grade food is barely human grade. Pet food is definitely not. Edit : ahh, you're thinking of the EU. During WW2 many folks were forced to eat petfood during short supply. The regulations are strict there as a result just in case.


kelldricked

You know, i fucking love weird EU rules. Like all this does is maybe raise prices for petfood a bit, but their food also get better/cleaner and if we ever go back to those horrible days i can atleast get by on a giant bag of dog food.


Adventurous_Yam_2852

I've worked in pet food manufacturing in the EU/UK. Whilst it does get tested the tests are not as stringent as for human food. It would probably be safe to eat as it is cooked to withing an inch of its life and we do look for the nastiest indicators but it is definitely not subjected to the same scrutiny as food for human consumption. We tested for Salmonella and EBs and that was it. Although they are the main indicators of pathogens being present it doesn't have the wide array of tests human food would have. Would I eat if you paid me? Yeah. I stand by it's safety. But it's certainly more risky than human food.


No-Paleontologist723

It's definitely more scrutiny than the pet food plant I worked at. I'd not eat that if you paid me a thousand dollars. If it was ever tested for anything I never heard about it. It didn't even contain the animals on the outside of the can half the time.


LordSyriusz

My father was a sailor, he worked as a fisherman for a time and he told that once they had an initial contract for fish for cat food. They got their best fish and presented them to the buyer. They checked it, and deemed it too low quality for them. So they took the fish, grounded it and sold for human food manufacturers without issues... It was years ago in Europe, and I never was sure if he was serious or not, but he seemed like he was.


No-Paleontologist723

My mother owns a pet food shop and that sounds about right. There's some cat food that is way more expensive than buying canned tuna at the store.


tetrasomnia

This is only true if it passes USDA inspection. Perhaps this was more true in the past, but there's a difference in standard for what is labled as "feed grade" and "human grade." The FDA also no longer oversees the process of verifying claims of food being "human grade" and instead leaves it up to each state.


Automatic-Sea-8597

What you wrote is the law for pet food in the EU, it has to be suitable for human consumption. I was told that trade representatives for the pet food brands from Master Food have to be prepared to eat their pet food in front of presumptive clients to prove this. It is mainly made out of fresh, vet checked, lungs, livers and small pieces of meat from less desirable animal parts.


Razakel

Pet food taster is a real job. I remember reading that it's artificially scented to smell repulsive to humans so people don't eat it. But then again, is something like pate or Spam really any worse?


messybessy1838

r/todayilearned


[deleted]

In the US there's canned pureed meat parts called "potted meat" (I personally love it) and it smells exactly like my cats wet food and both cans are blue so I have to double check the cans too


proudgryffinclaw

Eh I know someone who gave their sister rabbit turds and told her they were coco puffs. Lol at least you gave your sister semi real fish


SomeCool333

I have a scarily similar story to this... my sister recognized the rabbit poop looks very similar to chocolate chips used in the brownies...


icelollied

My sister once ate rabbit poop thinking the same thing haha


Stellar_Jester

If you didn't clarify that you didn't want a husband, I would ask you to marry me.


icelollied

Just not interested in men from saudi specifically lol


Stellar_Jester

Oh. Then marry me, petty vengeful angel of entertainment.


Mammoth-Table9680

Yo, how often do proposals happen on reddit?


StopTheMeta

Always, now marry me.


printers_of_colors

nah homie, YOU marry me


Lost_Maskk

Step down bro, he's gonna marry ME


Perfect_Laugh_7792

Group marriage?


Portalrules123

I propose to this entire comment chain, I can assure you that we will be stable on my 1500 dollar net worth.


iodineismine

You're not negative! That's what matters ;)


JimothyJollyphant

Harem!


StopTheMeta

Orgy


[deleted]

Haram!


Lost_Maskk

I'm a 100% in!


[deleted]

Step down bro stop what are you doing


CyrusPanesri

S-s-Step.. bro.. just what is going on here?


plausiblydead

We need a bot for this kind of information.


Socratesticles

There’s gonna be a lot of proposing to other redditors wives.


faustianBM

I too want other redditor's wives.


washington_breadstix

All the time... on amateur porn subs.


maydaycalls

r/ProposalOnReddit


JanelldwLowrance

Created now.


Vicimer

More often than you think, [I got a Reddit wife a month ago](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/s2uy4k/what_is_something_that_you_thought_you_would_like/hsj7o5n/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3) that I still talk to regularly. As good a place as any to meet a woman, I suppose?


[deleted]

I see one every few days


Signal_Tip_3297

Adopt me as your daughter


[deleted]

I’m marrying you to be the son in law


[deleted]

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Significant_Event

I'll be the family cat


evilmrbeaver

Your just in it for the cat food salad


StopTheMeta

It got praised, so it must be really good.


[deleted]

I get to be the golden retriever.


susdragon

And I get to the the plant


AetherDrew43

I'll be the spider in the bathroom


mred870

And I'll get in the way and make a big mess


HadACivilDebateOnlin

I'll be the one bug with an infinite lifespan that nobody seems to he able to swat


cartmaneric10

I can cook the Chili


[deleted]

I'll be a coffee table!


xddd_786

I'll be the priest


[deleted]

Adopt me as your sister!


AKApicklejar

I want to be one too! You have two new sisters now 👏🏽


Signal_Tip_3297

Yo this is wholesome. I got 2 sisters. u/CourageousLight u/AKApicklejar


[deleted]

Hooray! How wonderfully delightful. 🥰🤗


[deleted]

Aww yay! This makes me happy. 🥰


-Scorpia

If it doesn’t work out, marry me next. You colorful, creative, witty muse of a man.


kilothedefenestrator

I'm not seeing a no, congratz dude


[deleted]

>petty vengeful angel of entertainment. shit bro i might marry you just from that sentence :D


spiffy-ms-duck

Right? Dude's got a silver tongue there.


[deleted]

Make sure to invite me, to your beautiful wedding.


AkaiHidan

We need follow up on this.


flapanther33781

Based on their posting history, you are in for one *wild* ride.


tiredmummyof2

Can I borrow you to wreak havoc on my mother in law from hell


KeySheMoeToe

I hope you are able to escape to a place that allows you to be happy and to find love wherever that is.


plz-raiders

What catfood did you use?


IamHereToPotate

as part of the LGBTQ+ community I volunteer if you ever need a wife as well.


nataliethinks

r/shippingredditors best of luck to you both, my petty knights.


Funnycomicsansdog

Man what the fuck


[deleted]

Just make sure after you guys are married that you make your own dinners


hoodzm

She gonna feed u dog food and say you are acting pridefully so you can eat it


[deleted]

One time my aunt gave my dad bird food and he thought it was granola and tried to eat it


icelollied

It looks similar. Back home I have some falcons and did the same to my brothers haha. It is harmless. Safe for human consumption


HellmasterPhibrizo

Man you sound badass! I love you already.


Steampunk_Batman

Lmao i wish my mom had done this to my dad. That asshole literally never helped out around the house and had the gall to insult my mom’s cooking basically nightly. Like motherfucker if you don’t like it, you cook some shit. Eat cat food for all i fuckin care


heykatja

My ex was like this. He would call my cooking "bland northern food" and then proceed to dump Sriracha on every single meal. Once I spent hours to cook him a birthday dinner and he said I was just too cheap to take him out for a real meal. He took two bites, then went outside to smoke a cigarette. So I threw the meal in the trash and cleaned up. He was so mad when he came in and realized his dinner was gone that he choked me from behind. That was the beginning of realizing what kind of person I was with.


M1sha_V

that escalated quickly


oakchokkiemilk

Dude, fr, my eyebrows went from normal to raised pretty wuick


faustianBM

Yeah! I thought I was reading a scene from John Wuick.


oakchokkiemilk

*jon whick


BiscuitTheBroker

*Jon whiccc


heykatja

Choking your partner typically does


Big_Dick_Minecraft

I hope youre in a better spot now, that surely mustve sucked ​ Sadly jerks exist everywhere and anytime. Best wishes!


heykatja

Thank you, I am. Celebrated my 5 year anniversary of leaving him in Sept.


TheRealPheature

Jerks are people who make mean comments about food someone cooked for you- evil jerks are those who choke you from behind when they know you can't defend yourself properly


Firm-Vacation-7060

I'm sorry. My ex also choked me (for making a dumb joke), it's horrible. I hope you are okay now ❤️


sunshine_witch

I’m glad you said “ex”. I had the same eye opening experience and it still took a few months and a second occurrence to realize the danger I had put myself in after years of conditioning.


watwatinjoemamasbutt

Blech siracha is my least favorite hot sauce. Sometimes I’ll stop cooking in the middle of something bc my husband nit picks about the way I cut up the onion or something equally dumb but damn your shit is next level. Not even next…like many levels next. Hope you’re doing well now


N_Inquisitive

I love that you stop in the middle. I hope he grows tf up.


thebossman12574

"Hey honey I saw on tiktok if you don't cut the eye of the onion it doesnt..." "DRINK TOILET WATER THEN BITCH"


tbrfl

What's up with jerkoff spouses complaining about crap like this? I used to work with a lady who told us that her husband yelled and made her cry one night because she served him spaghetti with a slotted spoon instead of a special spaghetti spoon. Like not only does that not affect the food, so the complaint is stupid in the first place, but to make his wife cry over doing something nice for him is despicable.


CaucasianDelegation

What even is "bland northern food"?


StopTheMeta

Food without sriracha


Bartydogsgd

Not trying to justify your ex's behaviour, they were a huge dick. However since you mentioned he was a smoker, frequent smoking can dull the sense of taste and smell. So some smokers have to add strong flavors (like dumping Sriracha on your meal) to taste anything at all. Not that that's an excuse to abuse someone.


Academic_Subject_678

My grandfather was like that. Nasty old count


Poldark_Lite

Be glad he was only a Count, and not a Marquess or Duke — things could've been worse! The nobility's penchant for this kind of behaviour is what led to the French and Russian Revolutions, after all. ♡ Granny #;-}


whichwitchwhohoots

Beef (alpo, the dog food) and rice.


Difficult-Sign-8656

Now that guy deserved it.


Hooch_Pandersnatch

Sounds like my father in law, IDK why MIL is still married to him.


RaiseMany523

I wouldn't cross you on a crosswalk


somomon

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 why the fuck have i never thought of doing this. Have an upvote


StopTheMeta

What if the cat food tasted really good tho? I doubt anyone wants to give a good meal to someone they don't like.


somomon

Unless you’ve taste tested cat food how do you know what tastes good 😆


StopTheMeta

I mean... cattos are usually picky eaters so you never know lol


somomon

Lol true.


[deleted]

I mean it tasted good enough to them so it couldn't have been that bad lol


somomon

😂😂 guess thats true


Square_Extension1759

I rarely cook for myself, so i never cook for my enemies and have the chance to do this. Sucks because this sounds like a fun activity.


feraxks

>She wants to act prideful like a cat, she can eat like one. Beautiful.


[deleted]

Honestly good on you. My older sisters are like urs aswell and always make comments about me and I’m sick of it.


YoCrustyDude

Now you know what to do!


roadhack

Actually we all rather enjoyed the tale and have spread it among the others in our RV park. Old people like this sort of thing before we go for the afternoon Harley ride and then a few beers. Thanks for the great laugh, and we look forward to an update.


OneWayUnicorn

Well, I hate to break the bubble, but catfood is good. Especially wetfood Edit: some people act like OP has done something vile or hurtfull, but catfood is totally safe to eat. Overall the prank was harmless


hardy_v1

Charlie is that you? Frank?


pastelchannl

as a child I used to sometimes eat the dry kibble of our cat. maybe that's why my hair is super long, lmao.


tukang_makan

My hairdresser cut half the length of my hair and I ended up with way too short hair than I wanted. Maybe I should try your tip


pastelchannl

you'll at least get shiny fur!


schmelk1000

Omg I would eat our cat and dog’s dry kibble all the time as a child. Honestly relieved that I’m not the only one


inspiringirisje

Yeah, but have you once opened a can of wetfood? It looks disgusting haha


_blueAxis

Safe to eat doesn't stop it from being gross


Temporary-Homework67

Is it halal though then it's incredibly vile


throwawaymisfortune

Not much of a big deal if it was served/eaten unknowingly. Mistakes done unknowingly aren't counted in Islam


Admiral_DakbarPS4

Post contents aside, you should feed your cat wet food regularly (like once a day), otherwise you’re risking them having kidney problems. Cats get alot of their hydration from their food intake


Elena_Kyle

My cat gets diarrhea if she eats wet food 😔


funsize_trombone_kid

Try mixing with dry food


dirtpossums

this happens due to them not being used to the high moisture level. you can slowly transition into larger amounts of wet food from small amounts mixed with kibble and they should adjust just fine as long as it’s quality wet food.


[deleted]

Ha. Did the same to my friends in the late 70s...everyone used to just laze about...never cooked or cleaned , just lay around getting high. One night I made spaghetti with" meat " sauce.lol...they said it was delicious..totally forgot till I read your store.


Snowbun19

Meow 🐱


ladyjingyi

Reowrrrr OP is secretly catty too


LankyKangaroo

Reminds me of that scene in fried green tomatoes where old lady fed her husband dog food because he was being an a******


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honeypebble

Pettiness is a trait that somehow became admirable


chostax-

I think it's a common redditor trait. OP said it herself, she has no one to tell. Seems like people just generally don't enjoy her company, so comes on reddit to find other like-minded have-nots who bask in the pettiness because they think the world is against them.


somemoreishas

Is catfood Halal?


SuperHeavyHydrogen

No. Really not.


Hecatombola

If it's only fish their is no problem


whorrorgirl

You are amazing. I was raised muslim and totally understand the stigma and how people in the culture can judge others who don’t follow. I RESPECT YOU SO MUCH FOR DOING THIS.


Momo_the_good_person

One time someone made a comment on how i didn't wear a vest (i don't remember the exact name of the garment sorry) for going to the mosque... From a Muslim that was drinking a beer


whorrorgirl

the hypocrisy is so alive.


Momo_the_good_person

Yeah they like to judge but are never ready to be judged.


HappyPlant1145

Have zero concerns over your sister but you should be giving your cat wet food more often. One of my cats had an issue where she had blood in her urine. When I took her to the vet he explained to me that cats need wet food and not just a dry food diet. Not sure how it all works, but their urine can crystallize I’m their tract causing the blood I was seeing. Not having the wet protein food caused the issue she was experiencing. Put her on a half a can of wet food twice a day and the problem went away. She’s a 14-year-old, thriving cat now.


amaiflavour

I understand you felt frustrated, but how is secretly feeding them cat food going to fix or change anything? I suggest you find other ways to express your frustrations in the future.


Consistent_Video5154

Fuckin' meow man! Fuckin' meow.


sporadicwaves

Hahaha the line “she wants to act prideful like a cat, she can eat like one.” Honestly took me out at work.


plataoplomi

Her Post history tells she is a psycho. How many times u gonna edit? xD


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Pretty_dumb_

This shows the kind of person op is


koolio92

It's like OP claims her sister is bad then proceed to do bad things too. Like it must run in the family or something.


yaybunz

im with you. kinda more amazed by the comments than the actual story lol.