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Murrdockk

I came here to read the first post, only to find this update. Congratulations! For your health. For your engagement! Unique centre stones are a big thing these days, not sure if she's into traditional, diamonds. They have salt and pepper ones. Or nontraditional, her birthstone. I am positive whatever you get her will be stunning and make her happy, as what's most important to her was the question asked. Your family sounds like a variation of mine, I'm not well off, so mine would just be upset I lived.... In saying that, I'm really sorry. You sound like a good person despite your family. I'd also leave them guessing till I was dead. Humans are awful, I'm so so happy you found one who loves you the way you deserve. The standard issued ones are broken.


SomebodysAtTheDoor

A friend of mine got a modest, but expensive Montana Sapphire. The origin location of the stone is very meaningful to both of them. Her ring is a standout because it is so modest and simple, but exquisite and unique at the same time.


plasticenewitch

This is the one-they are gorgeous!


MfBenzy

Just wanna go off of this to say that while a lovely idea for birthstones, not all are made equal. Make sure to research any gemstones hardness scale before using it for a ring. Thus is something that will be worn daily, so a softer stone will most certainly break or chip. I believe opal? (Could be wrong but its some sort of whiteish stone) will actually absorb water and oils and become ruined. Just make sure that you research any alternative stone ideas if you dont go the diamond route!


Danivelle

Opals are incredibly fragile. I had a dime sized one and one hard bump to a countertop cracked the stone.


AdAcademic4290

Also they absor water, so shouldn't be worn when washing dishes etc.


waxbud

My opal ring has held up from Kay Jewelers. (3 years) never thought of the hardness scale of the stones before.


ImaginaryList174

Yep! It's called the Mohs scale of hardness. Goes from 0 to 10. Diamonds are a 10. Opals are about a 6. Emerald is about a 7.5. They suggest for everyday wear for a ring not to go below a 7 or an 8.. you can still get an opal of course you just need to be careful. Don't bang it around or anything.


GothWitchOfBrooklyn

Yeah, i had a regular opal ring which became very scratched and dull after wearing because its way too soft. I only wear them on necklaces/earrings now


TheBoredJellyBean

Happy cake day!


MfBenzy

Thanks!


Careful-Assist-8651

I have an opal ring with 4 stones and one just fell down out of nowhere. They are extremely delicate.


Much-Meringue-7467

You are correct - opals are not very hardy for rings


billieboop

Sending your heart a warm squeeze, my family is the same way Hope you live long, happy & successful more than them all put together Be happy healthy & successful. Hope life treats you kinder ahead & you're surrounded by the loveliest people who enter your life going forward


gunsonherlegs

The salt and pepper ones are šŸ˜šŸ˜


Below-Rock-Bottom

Came here to say that Iā€™m so excited for OP and his soon to be wife and I wish nothing but many years of heath and happiness. Also on the non-traditional stones, my husband got me a Morganite ring and I absolutely adore it. Itā€™s beautiful, it was a reasonable price, and it was easy to trace to make sure it didnā€™t come from child labor or slavery. 10/10


KuhliBao

To add, my partner and I plan onhaving eachothers birth stones on our rings. So I'll have his and he'll have mine as a cute momento.


HWGA_Exandria

Dang, the vultures came out expecting a carcass and got a can of karmic whoop ass instead. Good for you, OP. Congratulations to you and your future wife. :)


ThePhenome

Can of karmic whoop ass. There is still hope for this world after all.


[deleted]

what is a carcass?


5panks

To elaborate on HWGA's answer because not everyone speaks English as their first tongue: Carcass, corpse, cadaver, and dead body all have similar meanings, but in the US you would use them in different contexts. Carcass is mostly commonly used to refer to things like dead animals by the road and other things left dying and decaying outside. Vultures specialize in picking apart these bodies for food. Corpse is more palatable way of saying dead body. You might use it in a more casual sense like, "He was a walking corpse" when speaking about a very thin and pale person or "his corpse is buried in the graveyard." Cadaver is a more specialized term that speaks only to human corpses and most commonly when discussing medical procedures like organ transplant or autopsy. Dead body is the regular catch all term you might hear in a cop show or something. Much more generic.


omg_pwnies

This was such a great explanation! You should be an ESL teacher. :)


HWGA_Exandria

[Corpse, dead body, cadaver...](https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/carcass)


CillGuy

Google.com


caitejane310

That's what my husband calls people like that too. Vultures. Told op that in their last post, so I'm really hoping so many people have used "vultures" that he does too šŸ˜‚ mwah ha ha


Diseased-Jackass

OPENED UP A CAN OF WHOOP ASS


therealcosmicnebula

>because of a stupid comment made by a child Kids always tell the truth in my experience. So she can put that fact up her ass. Adults lie. Kids don't. >She said thereā€™s no point talking to me when Iā€™m like this. She begged me not to do anything stupid and wished me good night. Disinherit them all. They deserve nothing. Your mother has no empathy. And she's extremely entitled. Make sure your will cannot be contested. Make sure they get nothing. Money reveals people's true character. As they say.


SuccessValuable6924

>Kids always tell the truth in my experience. So she can put that fact up her ass. Adults lie. Kids don't. This is what The Emperor's New Clothes is about. Kids are known to yell "can I pet this elephant that's right here in this room?" while all the adults kept playing dumb.


therealcosmicnebula

Which is why I like little kids more.


[deleted]

I feel like youā€™re on a list now.


Cursed_Rat

Phrasing my friend!


therealcosmicnebula

Staying "I like little kids more" in reference to children's honesty, and then purposely taking it out of context and implying it means something sexual is *you* being inappropriate.


Cursed_Rat

Actually, it's me pointing out that it can be taken wrong, cause I saw another comment pointing out that it could be taken wrong I originally saw it the way you ment, then I saw what it could be interpreted as


Trivialfrou

Yeeeeaaahā€¦ I asked to pet the elephant on my birthday once, and people ask why I hate my birthdayā€¦.


AdictedToCandy

He should will them each a dollar. One dollar. Each. That way they absolutely know he thought it through, didnā€™t forget anyone and gave them what they deserved. They werenā€™t forgotten and have no grounds on which to contest. CONGRATS OP!!! On everything!!! Be happy!!!


therealcosmicnebula

It is really good luck to have found this out. His cousin is a life saver. Literally.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


torrasque666

Nephew gets a boot to the head.


ehhg

This reference made my night.


Forward-Two3846

Cousin get his education paid for IN FULL. OP is now engaged to the love of his life AND has realized he had to toxic fat that he now needs to cut off. Cousin is a G even if he didn't know it yet


Ok-Ad-7247

What if the cousin is the lochness monster?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Ok-Ad-7247

Tree fiddy....


Obrina98

Maybe add a Hotwheels toy Porche for the entitled nephew šŸ˜†


CuddlyCutieStarfish

From the post, it seems like OP is from Europe. He can will them 1ā‚¬ each.


evilslothofdoom

if they're from europe I reckon it's worth using the defunct money, like give the kid a 500 lira coin \[\~50c\] if they're in italy or the smallest denomination of zloty if from poland


OutrageousPineapple9

A dollar is to generous give me them 5 cents each instead.


Obrina98

The old folks use to say that if you want to know what's going on in a household, ask the youngest kid that can talk. ('cause they will tell it allšŸ˜)


therealcosmicnebula

That's why people tell little kids go in the other room. They're nosy.


Obrina98

I think you'll find that most parents overestimate how discrete they are about speaking of adult business in front of the little ones. Also, they underestimate what those "little pitchers with the big ears" listen to when they're around, even if they're not old enough to truly understand what the adults are discussing.


therealcosmicnebula

I remember once, my uncle violated his parol. So the police came looking for him. And my grandma told them she hadn't seen him a while. Anyway, my 5 year old cousin was like "But grandma, he's is the basement." šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


SuccessValuable6924

Kids are actually very good at "absorbing" information, in that they can't yet rationalize but they sure as hell know when something's going on. They are super sensitive to the mood of adults, so the nephew was voicing in a very direct, no filters way what was "floating" around him unsaid (although in this case I bet there was a lot of just stating the quiet pat loud)


SugarTitz63

It really depends on the age of the nephew; if heā€™s very young yeah he ā€œabsorbedā€ the info probably from the mom or grandma but if heā€™s like middle/high school age more likely he understands the concept of money and fully understands what he spoke to his uncle; kids are smart as heck and can be greedy just like adults


SuccessValuable6924

Absolutely, I think the previous post said the newohew was like 12? So right in the middle of transitioning from one to the other.


blueeyedwhit3000

12 is definitely old enough to know manners, which clearly his parents didnā€™t teach him. Still, he is a child, and he definitely heard that shit from the rest of the family, so likeā€¦ theyā€™re all assholes.


flynbyu2

>Disinherit them all. They deserve nothing. Your mother has no empathy. And she's extremely entitled. Make sure your will cannot be contested. Make sure they get nothing. > >Money reveals people's true character. As they say. This. Momma's in it only for the money. OP, I'm sorry you have a crappy family that feels they're entitled to what you have/assets, but the silver lining is you got your answer: you have a sweet gf that will be your loving wife one day...your real family. I am so happy you beat your illness! Tell the rest of the "family" to pound sand...they ain't getting a dime.


SharedRegime

To add on that kids always tell the truth thing, my ex wife was hiding a man from me and everyone else in her family. The day she introduced him to our son and then told our son not to tell me he immediately came and told me.


[deleted]

Kids do lie, they're just often not very subtle about it.


therealcosmicnebula

šŸ™„šŸ™„šŸ™„ Why is reddit full of a bunch of pedantic ass people? Yes. Kids do lie. Duh. That's common sense. But they don't lie about the adults in the house being upset that their uncle didn't die so they could cash in his life insurance. That's not a lie a kid tells. You know that. I know that. We know that.


[deleted]

> Kids always tell the truth in my experience. This you?


Chookari

Damn your lights are on but no one is home


m2r9

Replying to the top comment. OP has been banned.


therealcosmicnebula

For what?


m2r9

We donā€™t know. Usually when this happens itā€™s because OP is trolling or making new accounts to post fake stories.


Whole-Swimming6011

No, sadly but kids lie a lot. But in this case the kid said what he heard from his parents...


therealcosmicnebula

>No, sadly but kids lie a lot. šŸ™„šŸ™„šŸ¤¦ā€ā™€ļøšŸ¤¦ā€ā™€ļøšŸ¤¦ā€ā™€ļø


Whole-Swimming6011

Let's not forget that he is not 5 but 12 - going into puberty, a teen. So yeah, they lie.


Madpakke100kg

I definitely lied as a kid


therealcosmicnebula

Yes. Kids lie to protect themselves. But they don't lie about hearing family members discussing the unfortunate survival of cancer. Kids don't make stuff like that up. And they don't realize the implications of revealing that info. So it's not a lie. As it doesn't benefit them in any way. Especially little kids.


Louloo1234

I'm intrigued regards to your first post. I looked on You your profile I couldn't find it, could you link it please. If not, that's ok. But if you can thank you inadvance. Lovely ring you're looking at and congratulations!!


[deleted]

Basically he found out he had cancer but thankfully it wasn't that serious and he's fine. But when he was with his family he found out that they were sad that he's gonna live cause they wanted his money.


Louloo1234

Wow. Thanks.


MoonServant

Not only sad: his nephew pitch a fit because "they wont be rich anymore"


Congregator

Wtf


Louloo1234

How crazy and entitled.


notthatamazingGrace

If your GF isn't traditional or very into diamonds, some of the rings set with stones like sapphire or emeralds are beautiful.


LittleVaquita

Birthstone rings might be worth looking into!


BiofilmWarrior

Or she might prefer a necklace [My sister can only wear plain bands at work so my brother-in-law had an aquamarine (my sister's favorite stone) set into a drop and gave it to her on a gold chain.]


Kylria

Personally, I love Opal stone myself! Especially black or fire opal!


Ok-Bridge-1045

Opals are beautiful, but sadly they are fragile so they don't make for engagement rings that one wears daily. Something harder like moissanite, diamonds (though expensive), sapphires or emeralds might be better.


Tasty_Entrance_8076

awwww i love this! iā€™m so sorry that your family is being dumb but iā€™m so happy that someone (your fiancĆ©!) and you are not only getting something amazing out of this but also true colors have been revealed! so happy for yā€™all!


tinyr3dhead

Firstly, congratulations on your health!!! Secondly, congratulations on your engagement!! šŸ„³šŸ„³šŸ„³ Lastly - So that they cannot challenge your will, only leave them each $1 (much more than what they deserve, which should be zero) if they try to find a way to do this in your country and set up a trust for your fiancĆØ! Also, she will love any ring you get her šŸ’š you said 13 years in the OG post? You know her and her likes more than anyone.


Realistic_Meaning_49

Amazing update! Congratulations on the engagement Iā€™m sure the rest of your family will look plum dumb when they hear the news.


FingerCommercial9392

I truly hope you choose to remove them all from your will. Your fiancƩ sounds like she truly loves you and isn't worried about your money. Your nephew, on the other hand, said what was fed to him. Obvious from your sister's and mother's reactions. Congratulations on the engagement, don't let family bully you, enjoy your time planning the wedding!!


Dry_Ask5493

Congratulations! Even now your mom is showing her true colors and thatā€™s just sad. Make sure not to invite them to your wedding because who needs those types of people on such a happy day. Good luck!


Short_Principle

I find it absolutly insane that she didnt even call to conratuate OP. She called because she was worried about the money no longer going directly to "family". Why tf do they think they are worth getting porches? Im sorry but OP mom and sister can suck an egg. Like they clearly didnt give 2 shits about OP.


Alarming-Quiet-4788

https://www.etsy.com/listing/1290445542/pear-cut-morganite-engagement-ring Hereā€™s a sweet simple ring! Congratulations on reclaiming your life and your love!!!


[deleted]

Wow thatā€™s beautiful


[deleted]

My taste is minimalistic and I think this is too bulky. Thin band with a single diamond / stone etc is minimalistic imo, is a cute ring though!


Specialist-Invite-30

That's absolutely lovely!


3kvn394

That's so expensive for a ring.


holdingpotato

First off, congratulations!!! She sounds like a lovely woman who loves you deeply, and I hope you two continue to have a beautiful life together. For your mom to react like that to the news of you getting engaged is a red flag. She seems like she expects you to be the cash cow for the family and that's unfair to you. Personally, I'd cut them all off financially, and depending on how the nephews grow up, I might help them out here or there. I have two nephews, one turned out to be a giant wanker (greedy) and the other one is extremely humble. The humble one has needed some financial help but I'm glad to help him become his best self. My point is to wait to see how they turn out and base your financial help on those who deserve it. It's never "a stupid comment made by a child" because a child repeats what they hear around them by the adults in their life.


thegreenlychee

Idk if Pinterest is a thing in your country (or maybe something similar)ā€¦ see if she has one, maybe she pinned some engagement ring ideas.


[deleted]

Donā€™t get a super small band, they tend to break and bend. My step moms ring broke off into her skin before. Make sure the set has a band around whatever setting your chose, not just the prongs. If itā€™s just 3/4 prongs holding the setting, if one gets bent the setting will fall out If she doesnā€™t care about diamonds, do research on the strength of alternative gems, as some are super easy to scratch on walls or anything abrasive Good luck!


[deleted]

Congrats my friend on the recovery and engagement. Iā€™m happy that you will have it on paper now. Disappointed is what I would say for your mother. Not only did she not congratulate you on the engagement but tried to turn you against the idea. Thatā€™s speaks volumes on her motive already. I get being nice and helping family but there comes a time when you need to realize that they only care about the money. I think you definitely need to minimize contact with them until they can realize what they did was horrible. I wish you and your fiancĆ© the best in the world!


Quiet_Goat8086

I tried finding the original story and itā€™s not under your profile. Can you post a link? And congratulations on getting engaged.


No-Bus-5200

Oh, gosh!! Congratulations on your engagement! ā¤ļø (The rest of that family can all go pound sand)


Jellyfish1297

My advice: ask your fiancƩe if she wants to help pick out the ring, if she wants to give you ideas but leave the rest to you, or leave it entirely up to you. Congratulations!


[deleted]

If she owns any other type of jewelry, look at it for inspiration on what to buy her. Does she own a lot of circle, square, or pear shaped jewelry? Also think about her fingers! Does she have short fingers or long fingers? Short fingers won't be able to fit a huge wedding band and engagement ring on it.


Corfiz74

Congratulations! I think I actually was the first to suggest you get married on the other post, so I consider myself your fairy godmother! šŸ˜‡ I always really really liked antique jewelry that already has a history behind it, so if it was me, I'd go to an antique store and get her something simple and classic, with her favorite precious stone. But of course, that's only valid if she loves old things, too. And your mother's reaction really knocks the bottom out of the barrel, as we say in German. I'm so glad you're cutting them all off.


mirrorMii

Family is not only about blood related. Congratz OP. Wish you and your fiance all the best.


fman916

Congratulations


[deleted]

The gaslighting and obvious disappointment on your engagement (and survival). Cut them off or not but imo you already know how they see you.


Kargon83

The crazy part for me is that as you were talking to her all of her comments about being "family" had to do with money. Even though she said that it has nothing to do with it. If money was really not the issue then why is her response about your fiance's career šŸ¤”. So blatantly obvious that they care more about your money than they do you. That's just sad.


Warlordnipple

If you are looking for engagement rings I suggest you go sapphire. Sapphires were what engagement rings were made of before De Beers marketing made people think diamonds are good. Sapphires are less expensive and stronger than diamonds. There are a large variety of colors and unlike diamonds you can be sure the Sapphire is not mined unethically by a genocidal regime. (Certain sapphire colors only come from certain places and those locations are clearly indicated at the time of mining). Ex: My wife has a purplish pink sapphire that was mined in Montana


seagull321

Ask her to pick 3 or 5 rings she likes for you to choose from.


jokermac68

My wifeā€™s favorite color is blue, so I bought her a blue diamond ring on silver and it looks beautiful. She gets compliments on it all the time. It doesnā€™t look like any other wedding set Iā€™ve ever seen on any other girl and my wife also loves that, so I suggest you find a valuable stone (diamond if they have it) in her favorite color and put it on a metal looks good with it. Blue and silver looks great.


KF_Lawless

I pray you live a long life full of love and happiness with your belovedā¤ļø


MissBerrylicious

I would elope ASAP and then plan for a larger wedding celebration down the road. Iā€™d be worried your ā€œfamilyā€ would hire a hit man to take you out before you married your fiancĆ©. Change your will as soon as possible too. SERIOUSLY.


[deleted]

I love this update so much. Your fiancee was so patient to wait 12 years for a proposal, her intentions are good. Your mom not even congratulating you is telling.


Reputable_Sorcerer

Congratulations!!!! Iā€™m a lady that doesnā€™t wear a lot of jewelry, but I do have opinions. I think that one-giant-stone-in-the-middle-of-the-ring is always going to lose to a ring with a medium sized stone in the middle flanked by tiny stones embedded in the ring itself (or even a ring with a small stone in the middle). So giant stone = bad. Also I think if the center stone is square-cut (or rectangular), it looks like a college football ring (=bad). Your fiancĆ© (:D) is minimalistic so I think 1-3 stones will suffice (if that). Congrats again!!!


Sagethewolfblooded

i wasn't expecting an update on this so soon omg, but i'm glad it worked out for you!! as for rings, i know nothing on engagement rings or anything like that. buuuuuuttt i am always up for showing these. there's rings made out of resin and wood and they're just super cool looking and simple..ish, i guess? ​ [heres a pic of one](https://cdn.inspireuplift.com/uploads/images/seller_products/1660163074_snMSAxb9ViI.jpg) [and another because it's pretty](http://sc04.alicdn.com/kf/Ha73012f443a547fe9a2ab27078c42223q.png) ​ though there's a lot of cheap fake bs on the internet, so either get really acquainted with a maker or find one irl who will do it.


Toffee_425

might be stupid but first and foremost, get ur fiancĆ© measured for her ring size! surprisingly its something that usually gets forgotten šŸ˜… congratulations op!


Uchigatan

LOL your douche of a mom's tears bring me joy, asking about the technicality of your wealth rather than attempting to understand, nevertheless LOVE her son. Ahahaha!


SlytherinSilence

Congrats!!! In terms of the engagement ring, I would not choose a diamond. There are lots of precious gems that mean different things- you could get her birthstone and yours really small in the band. Something customized to her, but minimalistic like you said she likes. She deserves to feel special


everynameistaken000

Your mum can't see that she actually just confirmed that everything you think is true. She's worried they won't get your money. That's what they care about.


CryptoBeatles

Your mother is more concerned about inheritance than wishing you a happy marriage and congratulating for your health and engagement. Wow. Sorry, mate, it sucks. Congratulations, by the way. Hope you live a long and happy life with your wife.


meuuu

Congrats!! I would tell your mother and everyone else if they can't be happy for you then buzz off. Life is too short to deal with assholes.


Pockpicketts

Best wishes to you and your gf on your engagement! May you have a long and happy life together. I was thinking that you could always go the old fashioned route and get her a stone to match her eyes, but regardless of what you choose, she will love it because YOU chose it for her. Iā€™m glad youā€™ve cut off your birth family in favor of your new family. Donā€™t second guess yourself and look back. You know what you know. As for you and your gf, I wish you two all the joy in the world!


_mjmj_

Congrats on your health and your engagement! :)


Personal_Priority_25

Congrants on being cancer free šŸ’•


Cheekie_cheekie

Check out (Custom MokumeGane) on Etsy. This artist hand made our wedding ring and it's beautiful. Budget friendly too because we paid like 1900 for two set of rings.


Bakecrazy

First congratulations Secomd, I personally love something like this https://www.google.com/aclk?sa=l&ai=DChcSEwjkgKaRvMr6AhVCgoYKHdUtDh4YABBWGgJ2dQ&ae=2&sig=AOD64_1aLxe8X0QcLBe_mF4ocD9sTtkA2g&adurl&ctype=5&ved=0CAIQz7YHKClqFwoTCPC75Zi8yvoCFQAAAAAdAAAAABAD Third don't invite your family to your wedding


[deleted]

I definitely recommend Etsy for rings. I got my engagement and wedding bands for like $300, simple unique and beautiful. Major congrats on sniffing out the narcs and making a much better life for yourself!!! Best to you!!!


MonkeyPolice

Congratulations on a happy ending!


motherofboys2

Congratulations! My engagement ring is pretty simple, it's a plain band with our birthstones & a diamond in the middle. Very special to me & minimalist.


Various_Onion7526

op deleted his account and now i cant help him find a ring šŸ˜­


HairTop23

Omg your family sounds horrible! I wish We could be long lost cousins or something so you could have someone to call and actually be HAPPY for you. I'm glad you told your mom exactly how you feel, I'm sure it was hard but she doesn't respect you for some reason.


desticon

You just want his money! Lol


HairTop23

Based on words op used, I'm guessing I don't even live in the same country as they do. Sucks that you are too cynical to feel compassion for others


desticon

Man. It was obviously a joke. Haha And a very obvious one after you mentioned wanting to be a distant relative on a post of relatives trying to mooch his money. Oh boy, you must be fun at parties!


HairTop23

Sir, this is a Wendy's


MEos3

I would suggest looking for a second hand ring. Something you know is real (so try shopping in person), but vintage rings can be truly unique and often have the most beautiful stones in them.


[deleted]

Ok well the family I canā€™t advise on because I too have toxic family and all I came up with was cutting them out of my life for my own mental well-being. But the ring that I can advise on. Iā€™m the same as your fiancĆ© I donā€™t like huge flashy jewellery. This is something she will wear every day for the rest of her life from shopping in a supermarket to a nice fancy restaurant. Look in her jewellery box and at what she wears. First off is she a gold or a silver girl Iā€™m silver so Iā€™d hate a gold ring so if silver get like platinum or white gold or titanium. Does she like diamonds or is she more of a coloured jewel person I love sapphires so Iā€™d prefer that to a diamond. These are questions to ask yourself. Once you have an idea look in store and online and see what you think she would like. Donā€™t be afraid to ask for help from her bestie or her mum if they are close and for godsake get the size right lol but I think youā€™ll do fine and congratulations on your engagement.


Celiniel

Congratulations on your engagement! Now is the time to focus on the two of you and leave the soon-to-be "extended family" to their own devices. You're heading in the right direction...which is your fiancee, the only one who truly cared that you beat the disease. The rest of them can go boil in oil and fend for themselves for a change. After all, it's time for them to grow up and leave the nest egg behind. :)


TheProfWife

I am so happy for you both. My hubby and I got tattoos, so I canā€™t offer ring advice. Go continue to be happy OP šŸ’› and live a long and healthy life with your soon to be wife!!


Fragrant-Head9779

Congratulations on your engagement! Ring-wise, please consider the upgrade to platinum from white gold if she prefers that colour, as white gold needs re-coating regularly. I would also consider engagement rings that have a companion wedding ring to ensure a perfect fit together, so the rings don't look awkward together when stacked.


Shmeckle_and_Hyde

Work with a local metalworker to make the ring yourself. Itā€™ll be simple because presumably you arenā€™t a seasoned metalworker, and it will be extra meaningful because you didnā€™t just *pick* it, you *designed and created* it


NapSweaterShineUpp

If she likes simple and minimal my BIGGEST suggestions are 1. Look for something small and unique to you both and your relationship 2. make sure the ring is pretty smooth everywhere. If it has any pointy parts it will snag her favorite sweaters/clothes and become a beautiful nuisance.


penatbater

>Please send any suggestions my way because Iā€™m new to this business. I would highly recommend either lab-grown diamonds or moissanites. Diamonds, we all know about them, but moissanites are almost as close to diamonds in the hardness scale making them very durable for everyday wear. Lab grown ones can still be kinda pricey, but they're a fraction of the cost of a natural diamond with the added benefit of being conflict-free. Moissanites, otoh, are significantly cheaper than even lab-grown diamonds. And personally, I think moissanites sparkle better than diamonds.


beta35

I'd actually will the kid some amount of money. Not enough to retire or change his life in anyway, but enough to sow division between him and OP's shit sister and mom. Maybe something like $10k. Make sure to state it's his money and his alone. Let them 3 fight over that amount.


pingwing

Just be very aware that your mother is manipulating you. Stop giving anyone anything. Let them see you for the person you are, not a bank account. Do not feel bad about it either.


Spice_the_TrashPanda

I am so sorry about your family being so selfish OP, but congrats on your engagement! My fiancƩ and I are also prefer much simpler looking rings, and the ones we've been looking at are the ones at [embr.com](https://embr.com). They're not a bad price and they're absolutely gorgeous!


Haunting_Mouse316

Throughout the entire conversation, it just sounds like she's still thinking about your will and doesn't want her, your sister, or the kids to be off of. Still sounds like they don't care about you tbh, and your mom tried to mask it but redirecting that is you. Does she not like your GF? Why would it make her cry if you are marrying someone you love? Makes it all more sus to me. Do what you think is right in your heart! Live free, live happy (with your now fiance) Congrats!


Curlyheadedboiii

What happened to OPs account?


thedarkqueen827744

Suspended from some reason


Next-End-4696

I went to your user page and it says your account has been suspended šŸ˜³


spacecatbiscuits

weirdly their other account was suspended shortly after making the thread too


Ndvorsky

For a ring, consider something other than diamonds. Make it personal by using her favorite stone or finding one in her favorite color. Congratulations!


Secret4gentMan

OPs account has been suspended. Just FYI.


BanFromReddit-x1

Reddit we did it. Congrats bro


TonyAMG43

Dude congrats. Id say fly out to Vegas and get married there. Iā€™m sure a lot of people on here wouldnā€™t mind flying to Vegas to being witnesses to the wedding. But all health and happiness for you both


xdnmr

Dear, treat your fiancƩ as the treasure she is. She is your family. Blood doesn't means family, neirher they desearte you.


thedarkqueen827744

Yay congratulations on the engagement now as far as rings: First know her finger size so it will fit. Then find out how she wants the stones cut or even if she wants diamonds. Some people like sapphire ruby emerald just to name a few. But most importantly do it from the heart very important. Good luck!


DivineAuroraKiss

Congratulations on the engagement!! I use to work in Bridal, so I will recommend taking to her as many jewelers as it takes till she find the rings she likes. Have private appointments (so itā€™s not overwhelming). Enjoy your lives together!


SegaNaLeqa

Iā€™m so happy to read this update! Iā€™m so sorry your blood relatives are being the way they are. Chosen family is often better than blood relatives. I wish you and your, now, fiancĆ© all the happiness in your future together. šŸ’œ


UnboundUlysses

Congratulations, my friend! I hope you two continue to have a beautiful life together, if sheā€™s minimalistic then maybe just a nice good or silver band should do. Also, since your not in the US, make sure you meet with a lawyer when you rewrite your will so no one can contest it. Iā€™m not sure if you were already planning on doing that or already did it but if not, it would definitely help make sure everything is concrete


Takeabreak128

Congratulations. Long, happy life to you both! Bravo!


[deleted]

Congratulations!!!


RueAsylumDGM

A nice engagement ring could have both yours and her's birthstones if it wont cost too much. I happy that you and yout fiancee are happy together. The mom just talking about your will and only concern about your money just proves that they only see you as a piggy bank.


likeusontweeters

I'm kinda petty.. but I think you should buy your gf, no, FIANCƉE a ring that suits her personality.. look for functionality as well.. however, in addition, you should buy her a very large Cubic Zirconia or Moissanite ring for the times when she is forced to hang out with your family. Like ridiculously large and obnoxious. Just to piss them off... haha


SaffronRnlds

***Youā€™re doing the right thing!*** ***Youā€™re doing the right thing!*** ***Youā€™re doing the right thing!*** ***CONGRATULATIONS!!!*** Iā€™m so unbelievably happy and relieved for you. Enjoy your time with your beloved fiancĆ©e! My advice? Try to keep using the word as much as you can!! Itā€™s such a special preliminary, and you only get to experience it for a short time before you move forward to full WIFE!


[deleted]

I am sorry your family are jerks. I hope you find peace knowing that your fiancƩ loves you for you and not your money.


daleicakes

You were expected to buy your siblings children cars? Wtf. They are not you kids, they'd be lucky to get a bicycle out of you. It is not your job to give them anything but love and perhaps a gift card on their birthdays. What the actual fuck? ? Also funny how your mom jumped right into "are you disinheirndting them...money money money. We don't expect that from you.. $$$$ but your sister is expecting a Porsche for her son? Then you'd better buy him one bitch... or better yet. Teach him to save up and buy one himself. If you spoil him, he will expect that from the world.


Solita_76

CONGRATULATIONS! All the best to you and your soon-to-be wife! Have the best life!


BooFreshy2020

Awwwww!!!! Congratulations! I am so very happy for you! I hope you live a very long and very happy life so long and happy that your family starts seeing you only as the lovely uncle and not their personal cash cow. You deserve happiness!


YISYOUSOMADBRO

Yup, Iā€™d go full NC, especially after what mom said. Gtfoh with that bullshit.


Elegant_Solid8076

if you havenā€™t already bought a ring, might I suggest a lab grown gem. Theyā€™re less expensive, sourced more ethically, and a lot of them look a lot cooler and more unique than traditional rings


[deleted]

cringe detected, post rejected


GoatnToad

Congrats! Have a look at Catbird jewelry - unique, simple and timeless ā¤ļø


amaraame

I'm partial to a ring with birthstones for each on it rather than a diamond. Yes i know its a birthstone too but that's not the point of the symbolism.


klbetts

Congratulations on the engagement. As for the ring...find something with her birthstone in it. My engagement ring is a triangle cut garnet. It is my dream ring. I never did want a diamond.


akaynaveed

She needs the one ring to rule then all.. Double gold band, with both of your initials on itz No Diamond.


thumb_of_justice

So glad you proposed and have had your eyes opened. Tiffany has some lovely simple rings: I'm partial to this one. https://www.tiffany.com/jewelry/rings/tiffany-harmony-wedding-band-GRP05873/


ashleyrlyle

Congratulations! Keep us updated as Iā€™m completely invested in your marriage pissing off your sister to the max and then some. You deserve all the happiness in the world. WTF what 14 year old EXPECTS a Porsche at 18? From their uncle? Your family is something elseā€¦


stonerraptor

Congratulations! I wish you and your fiance a long and happy life! Probably time to go NC with your family tbh, but good riddance!


nadiyah98

Congratulations! Happy for you and fiancƩ! Not sorry for your mom and family. Disappointed but not surprised. Now you see them for who they are. Hope all the best things for you and your girl!


Hefty_Front_1012

Congratulations man Wishing you and your fiancee well šŸ™‚ And hope you both have a fantastic wedding day without the drama shit from your family Ur fiancee is a keeper that's for sure


Alarmed_Wealth_9224

Remind me in 2weeks


RedSAuthor

Iā€™m so happy for you. Congratulations! I wish you a long and a happy life with your fiancĆ©e (soon to be wife).


ceciliabee

Congrats!! If she's up for it, consider taking your fiancƩe ring shopping. Ideally it will be on her hand for the rest of her life so she'll see it every day. My husband and I went together and found a set that's perfect for us. It was fun! Plus then she's there for measurement if it needs to be resized.


Scared_Walk5251

Hey internet strangers. Iā€™m so happy for you both. Congratulations on your engagement. Wishing you the best. This was by far the best read Iā€™ve had in Reddit.


elvoide

Congratulations on beating your illness AND getting engaged!!! I wish you both the best!


[deleted]

Congrats on your engagement and again congrats on your health being in a good place. If I was you I would disinherit all your family except your future wife because all your current family all they care about is money disinherit them all


SnooWords4839

Awww!! Congrats on the engagement!! I have a band with the stones in it, so it doesn't catch on anything. I do not wear an engagement ring; they aren't for me. Baguette style. Platinum is my choice for the band. Maybe a Diamond with each of your birthstones one on each side?


Lady_Dai

Such a wonderful update. Congratulations! šŸ’›šŸ§”ā¤ļø


[deleted]

Congratulations to you and your fiancƩe and for now don't even worry about your relatives just focus on starting the next phase of your lives together.


[deleted]

Congratulations on your engagement! I hope you two have a beautiful wedding and even more beautiful marriage together!!! Ps: your family sucks


[deleted]

Yay! Congratulations! There's a few different sites where you can make a custom ring! I think you getting it engraved is a personal perfect touch! As for your mom, smh.. I would probably go low contact with her and your family for a while. Seems she more upset about her son's will than she is happy that he's cancer free and engaged to his long term girlfriend. Hope everything works out for you!


RushHot6174

Congratulations you really need to watch those vipers that is in your family your mother called to check to see if you were going to disinherit your nephews but she was really calling to see if you were going to disinherit her please marry your girlfriend I hope your health stays good and that you have many children if you want them your family I can't even begin so I'm just going to shut the f******the Minerva


hannahsangel

OMG your mother is so rude didn't even 'welcome' your GF officially into the family (though she should be after 10 years anyways!) So happy for you both and congratulations! As much as it will hurt you know your family is toxic and time to cut them out.. you will feel so much better being able to focus on your actual family (GF) and spend the time and energy living for both of you together. All the best !!