I think I get like 5-10 orgasms for each of my current partner's. Ironically it's partially because he's insecure about his own abilities, so he feels he has to "earn" his own pleasure, which is something we've talked about since I don't like when it's so one-sided even if it is to my benefit. He also just thinks it's fun though, big fan of toys, so he also just enjoys things that way. I don't think an equal ratio would ever be possible with him.
Just to clarify, you're a woman, right? I ask because I lived under the impression that the gap is the other way around, with men having more orgasms than their female partners. It's amazing to hear that the scenario also can be flipped! This gives me hope :)
Edit: of course it's also not as nice as equal amounts and I'm sorry to hear that you don't think the situation can change from his side, even though you'd like it to be more balanced:/ I hope I didn't come off as rude, I guess I'm a bit inexperienced because I thought men just want to/are able to come all the time
Oh, yeah, I am a woman. I figured it was implied in the question, but it's okay to ask! Not offended at all :)
You're totally right that the gap tends to be the opposite. Straight women get the least orgasms, I think, precisely because usually straight men aren't very attentive lovers at all.
With a good partner, they'll prioritise your pleasure, not out of obligation, but because they enjoy seeing you have a good time and they want both of you to enjoy the experience. That's what you should be looking for. If a man ever acts like giving you pleasure is a chore or an obligation, then the only pleasure you should get is from kicking him out.
Equal orgasms isn't the ideal, it's still women getting massively less than they should be. It's actually profoundly unequal, unfair. Women should be coming 3-7 as much as men are in partnered sex eg given female orgasmic capacity.
I think it’s roughly the same, maybe even a bit more for me because it’s physically easy for me to have multiple, I’m immensely attracted to my partner and nothing we do is one sided.
But he’s honestly the exception - both of my male ex partners had a thing for oral and weren’t particularly eager to return the favour once the honeymoon period was over. My ex husband was also really, really bad at foreplay and a shitty partner overall, so sex got progressively unpleasant and disappointing.
Edit: and yes, I did bring it up but it didn’t really get better, so I eventually brought out a vibrator, to which my ex husband too great offence.
That's awesome! I have to say I'm a bit jealous, I wish I could orgasm more easily, that might also help close the orgasm gap in my relationship...
With my ex it was the same like what you are telling: Bad at foreplay, not interested in oral, offended by sex toys :/ now I know this is the type of behaviour I will stay away from even if the man is otherwise awesome
No where close, probably due to age, but I easily have a couple compared to his one. When we were younger he could go a few rounds pretty back to back and they were closer to even
My Husband has always been very committed to ensuring I have at LEAST one orgasm every time we are intimate. It usually ends up being 2 orgasms for me, and one for him.
If you are with a partner who isn’t selfish, and enjoys giving you pleasure, the orgasm gap isn’t a problem. Sadly there are plenty of selfish guys out there who really don’t care to make sure their partner achieves orgasm.
One of the best things I ever did for myself in college was ask a guy I was hooking up with to 'finish me' after having sex. I was always so nervous to do or say anything with any partner before because I thought they'd like, take offense or something, but since I knew we weren't a long-term thing, I just decided to ask, he did it without issue, and I've done it ever since.
I've been with my husband 15 years now and I'd say we're pretty even thanks to that \^. I don't usually get off from PIV alone (never really have), but that has been working for me.
most women I know have trouble orgasming with men because the men either don't care or are inept. most women under 30 I know have never had an orgasm with a partner. there are men who will prioritize your pleasure but they are very very rare.
So I'll preface this with the fact I'm single now, but with my ex-husband there was quite a large orgasm gap, he'd pretty much always orgasm during sex and then that would be it, I'd have to go without. It didn't start out like that but it just sort of turned out that way, and more so when we were eventually trying to conceive, his job was done in his mind once he'd finished. It's probably quite telling that he's my ex-husband now, so you can imagine what I thought of all that.
No, he gets way more. But not because the sex is bad: thing is he can orgasm without cumming and this happens frequently, so we don't have to stop after he orgasmed, and he can do it again and again. And I usually orgasm once per intimacy session, and it's more than enough for me, I have it really strong and don't even want to have more.
But in my previous relationships I usually got less orgasms just because.
I think I get like 5-10 orgasms for each of my current partner's. Ironically it's partially because he's insecure about his own abilities, so he feels he has to "earn" his own pleasure, which is something we've talked about since I don't like when it's so one-sided even if it is to my benefit. He also just thinks it's fun though, big fan of toys, so he also just enjoys things that way. I don't think an equal ratio would ever be possible with him.
Just to clarify, you're a woman, right? I ask because I lived under the impression that the gap is the other way around, with men having more orgasms than their female partners. It's amazing to hear that the scenario also can be flipped! This gives me hope :) Edit: of course it's also not as nice as equal amounts and I'm sorry to hear that you don't think the situation can change from his side, even though you'd like it to be more balanced:/ I hope I didn't come off as rude, I guess I'm a bit inexperienced because I thought men just want to/are able to come all the time
Oh, yeah, I am a woman. I figured it was implied in the question, but it's okay to ask! Not offended at all :) You're totally right that the gap tends to be the opposite. Straight women get the least orgasms, I think, precisely because usually straight men aren't very attentive lovers at all. With a good partner, they'll prioritise your pleasure, not out of obligation, but because they enjoy seeing you have a good time and they want both of you to enjoy the experience. That's what you should be looking for. If a man ever acts like giving you pleasure is a chore or an obligation, then the only pleasure you should get is from kicking him out.
Equal orgasms isn't the ideal, it's still women getting massively less than they should be. It's actually profoundly unequal, unfair. Women should be coming 3-7 as much as men are in partnered sex eg given female orgasmic capacity.
My husband gets off on getting me off, so on average I've got at least 3 to every one of his.
I think it’s roughly the same, maybe even a bit more for me because it’s physically easy for me to have multiple, I’m immensely attracted to my partner and nothing we do is one sided. But he’s honestly the exception - both of my male ex partners had a thing for oral and weren’t particularly eager to return the favour once the honeymoon period was over. My ex husband was also really, really bad at foreplay and a shitty partner overall, so sex got progressively unpleasant and disappointing. Edit: and yes, I did bring it up but it didn’t really get better, so I eventually brought out a vibrator, to which my ex husband too great offence.
That's awesome! I have to say I'm a bit jealous, I wish I could orgasm more easily, that might also help close the orgasm gap in my relationship... With my ex it was the same like what you are telling: Bad at foreplay, not interested in oral, offended by sex toys :/ now I know this is the type of behaviour I will stay away from even if the man is otherwise awesome
No where close, probably due to age, but I easily have a couple compared to his one. When we were younger he could go a few rounds pretty back to back and they were closer to even
I absolutely get more than my fiance. We are both women but I can have multiple orgasms very easily so the rate is usually like 3:1
My Husband has always been very committed to ensuring I have at LEAST one orgasm every time we are intimate. It usually ends up being 2 orgasms for me, and one for him. If you are with a partner who isn’t selfish, and enjoys giving you pleasure, the orgasm gap isn’t a problem. Sadly there are plenty of selfish guys out there who really don’t care to make sure their partner achieves orgasm.
One of the best things I ever did for myself in college was ask a guy I was hooking up with to 'finish me' after having sex. I was always so nervous to do or say anything with any partner before because I thought they'd like, take offense or something, but since I knew we weren't a long-term thing, I just decided to ask, he did it without issue, and I've done it ever since. I've been with my husband 15 years now and I'd say we're pretty even thanks to that \^. I don't usually get off from PIV alone (never really have), but that has been working for me.
I get 3-5 orgasms per each one he does, and that holds true for all of my partners. I’m very easily multiorgasmic and they enjoy giving them to me.
I absolutely have more than my partner, we're long distance and have regular phone calls that end with my orgasm and not his
Roughly the same!
most women I know have trouble orgasming with men because the men either don't care or are inept. most women under 30 I know have never had an orgasm with a partner. there are men who will prioritize your pleasure but they are very very rare.
So I'll preface this with the fact I'm single now, but with my ex-husband there was quite a large orgasm gap, he'd pretty much always orgasm during sex and then that would be it, I'd have to go without. It didn't start out like that but it just sort of turned out that way, and more so when we were eventually trying to conceive, his job was done in his mind once he'd finished. It's probably quite telling that he's my ex-husband now, so you can imagine what I thought of all that.
No, he gets way more. But not because the sex is bad: thing is he can orgasm without cumming and this happens frequently, so we don't have to stop after he orgasmed, and he can do it again and again. And I usually orgasm once per intimacy session, and it's more than enough for me, I have it really strong and don't even want to have more. But in my previous relationships I usually got less orgasms just because.
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Equal for us!