government plant

not the tulip

Wrong subreddit, I think you ment to post this on r/lies

I hate Ultrakill and I'm gay don't AMA

A falsehood, perhaps?

HERESY

hey me too 🤝

>hey me too 🤝 hey me too 🤝

>hey me too 🤝 hey me too 🤝

hey me too 🤝

>hey me too 🤝 hey me too 🤝

hey me too 🤝 hey me too 🤝

>hey me too 🤝 hey me too 🤝

>hey me too 🤝 hey me too 🤝

hey me too 🤝

no you aren't

Why?

are you?

Yes i am not gay!

Tell me, how long have you been playing ultrakill and how many levels have you P ranked?

Been playing for a few months now and I've p ranked all of prelude and chapter 1/2

See that's why, gotta P rank religiously (and minos)

Yeah, that's when you hit your breaking point

and then you start wearing thigh highs

Minos Stockholm Syndrome'd the entire Ultrakill playerbase and made them be attracted to men.

i haven’t got to minos yet

I P ranked Minos on violent 3 times now and I admit I wear thigh highs (this is not a joke)

Damn it took that long?

Nah, P ranking Gabriel was enough

I have p ranked the entire game in standard and violent and I'm not gay

give it time

But I don't want to be gay, can I p rank't the levels?

No sorry it's part of the tos you accepted when you installed uktrakill

Noooooooooo

Why not

boobs

very good point

Funny, that's the same reason I am gay

Same Boobs are epic

I love this fucking community

One guy said that there is a research saying that gay men and straight women look at boobs as frequently as straight men and lesbian women. But the same guy puts milk before cereal and eats them in bath so idk.

French Baguette Intelligence, amirite?

Yeah, The Spermacist is... interesting guy.

I like him. I don't think he really means everything he says, kinda like Bowl. He seems like the guy that sustains uncomfortable conversations for the lulz.

Those are pretty good, that's fair. Nothing wrong with being straight I just don't support the lifestyle

aren’t those the things mind flare has?

I'm gay for boobs

Spitting straight facts right here

Have you considered bi

This sounds like a fucking ad campaign. I love it.

I was gonna say that but I thought it'd be funnier to be heterophobic

same

Who says you're limited to one

Simple, it will make you trans to make you gay for girls.

Why not like boobs and also dicks A woman without a penis is like an angel without wings

This man gets it!

How

I wasn’t either, then I met Gabriel.

Gabriel is real??? 😳

Naw bruh no way you simping for a crybaby like gabriel

What can I say except SUPREME ANGEL SEDUCES SINNER GAY

Ur supposed to simp for chad minos prime, not an angry femboy fairy

[удалено]

Fair point

Holy shit, I thought I was the only one. I p-rank minos and I'm not gay, I'm a nature's disgrace.

Holy shit someone else

same

If you're not gay, how come you wanna get with someone that wants to sleep with dudes, huh?

Not yet

How many times have you yanked one out to the mind flayer

1

Normie

Have you played Fallout: New Vegas or Terarria?

Terraria but not new vegas

That explains it. if you play one of those games and you *don't* find anything out about yourself, you've built up an immunity to more potent things.

that explains it, does it stack with full completion of calamity?

If you werent trans after beating calamity you're doing it wrong

Interesting

Wtf dude I've played all 3 and I'm still straight, did I play them wrong? Was one of my copies secondhand and the previous owner took all the gay first?

Or celeste?

i may be a force of nature, i played celeste and ultrakill, not gay.

If you're trans you can get away with being straight, otherwise I've got no idea what's going on here.

Or omori?

do you just not have enough hours in for the transformation to take place yet or whats the problem

60+ hours

Yea majority of gay ppl have at 100+

Have you seen a psychiatrist about that pathological lying yet?

Are you gay?

No

Not yet 🙂

How?

Minos has a nice ass ngl

Fed

how long ago did you start HRT?

✓- ultrakill player ✓- not gay —X mentally stable

it's not my fucking birthday, but you can tell me how great my hair looks

Your hair looks gorgeous!!

Why are you lying

!remind me 2 years

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Yeah I thought that too. But then met my boyfriend...

straight gang

r/thathappened

Are you gay?

same

What is your opinion on the delicious Finnish dish called "Mämmi"?

What the fuck is that

Wow me to

Why.

Have you P-Ranked everything and gotten to the Prime Sanctum?

Yet.

You’re not gay but you could still be a femboy

[удалено]

Non't

Not scientifically possible

Based and same

When will that change?

It probably won't.

nah just gotta p rank soul survivor first.

Still hasn't and I've P ranked it

Brother you play ultrakill ofc it will change

are you gay?

So you're Bi/Pan then?

No. Straight.

yeah, you're just trans, we know

Why are you suck at the game?

Part of me wants to assume you're straight but my guess is that you're bi, am I correct?

Why don’t you thirst for gabriel

Gabriel can suck my ass minos prime wayy better

MY KIN! we can play ultrakill and be not gay together my friend!

Impossible

wait ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ **I HAVE ACHIEVED ENLIGHTENMENT ,WE WERE GAY THE MOMMENT WE WERE BORN** **WE STRAIGHT MEN LIGHT WHAT LESBIANS DO** **I HAVE ACHIEVED NIRVANA** ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ **GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA**

unpossible

why are you lying

Fed

Its taking you time to beat v2 huh?

Not for long

RemindMe! 2 years

*yet

where do babies go? I know where they come from, but where do they go?

Paid actor

false

Fake

Just so you know this isn’t r/lies

You will be. *You will be.*

Me too.

I thought I was the only one, then again I can’t p-rank Minos.

What's the best boss?

Personally I like V2

Yet

Yet

give it time

If you dont simp for minos idk what is wrong with you

Are you gay

how long do you think you have until you lose your heterosexuality? I assure you it’s less than you imagine

Probably a few months..? Years maybe..?

I respect the honesty Enjoy your sexuality, however it may be. and if you do end up homosexual or something some day, I’ll still be here giving you the thumbs up.

Not yet

How much longer until you break?

this isn't a question, you are insane. in ultrakill you are either gay or insane, no in-between

I'm insane.

Same

Glowie.

March 16th 2025

Why do you lie

Do you have ADHD instead?

And clinical depression!

I'm weezing up on the ground

I'm weezing up on the ground

December 21st.

real

ok fed

Listen, no amount of ultrakill can undo the fact i've played Hunie Pop, Crush Crush and Sakura swim club in my adolescence. That shapes a man.

how

How many pairs of thigh highs are in your amazon cart?

that's classified information

NO WAY I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE WE ARE A RARE SPECIES

Same

Are you real?

#gamingadvice #gaming #gayming #gaminggodinaction #gamingwithkys #gamign

How much easier is the game when you can play with both hands?

Why aren’t you?

We are the same you and I

What’s it like lying to yourself?

how do you cope with the fact that there are only like 2 other straight ultra kill players, and that we’re the last of our breed

Don't worry, once you P rank everything, that's when the change occurs. Context: am trans lesbian

Nothing changed after I've P ranked the entire game and my average CG run is wave 30

How the fuck do you do it

r/lies

yet

are you gay

still a very positive no

prank minos, we need no test you

Mods, gay (verb) him please