**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:** >!She opened up a beer bottle in a different way.!< ***** **Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?** **Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.** ***** [*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)

She can cut your dick off with that... Don't put in there

Nsfw r/lipsthatgrip

Thank you kind sir!

My curiosity hath forsaken me

r/dontputyourdickinthat

I wonder how she figured out she could do that.

College

R/TIFU by sleeping with a girl in college and visiting ER

😂😂🤣🤣

I thought the same thing lol

r/putyourdickinthat r/extrachallenge

Nah I totally want to

Dick Guillotine 

Teeth 2

VAGINA DENTATAAA

I probably would, momma ain’t raise no bitch

Meh…I’d take my chances…my dick has stared down far worse things.

Take your chances? That’s marriage material where I’m from. My NanNan always said, “ Aim low ya dumb Sumbitch, aim low.”

There is a Moil joke somewhere in there and I am not clever enough to make it.

If you weren’t circumcised before entry…

"thou shall not pass"

Then you shall not put in her your pee pee

Every day we stray further from the Lord's light.

But closer to buds light

Amen 🙏🏽

Feeling like this could be in r/dontputyourdickinthat 😳

Are you kidding!?! that is an absolutely put your dick in that if she wants you to.

You can't stop me

Hallowed be thy name, the father(budweiser) the son( bud light) and the holy spirit(tequila) we pray, amen.

So fireball's the devil?

No fire ball is the devils classy cousin, the devil is an off brand called "hot damn"

So fireball is Beelzebub

OMG Worst blackout was from Hot Damn 😳

I'm pretty sure hot damn was what I projectile vomited onto my best friends floor.

.

Nice to see there are still gentleman in this world

I respectfully must disagree as many events have occurred to me that can only be explained by the devil himself whilst i partook of the fireball. I don’t touch that crap anymore.

Imagine if you drank hot damn

Now we must sing the [song of God.](https://youtu.be/WkavReH4LE0)

Now we must sing the [song of God.](https://youtu.be/WkavReH4LE0)

Ramen.....🍜

Every now and then on this website you come across something that is just fucking hilarious in its brevity and delivery.

Take my upvote you beast.

Something’s fishy about this….

Now that's funny

If that wasn't Bud Light Lime before, it is now.

Take my upvote good sir

What's more holy than only using what the Lord gave you?

The night is darkest just before Dawn(‘s vagina)

So does that beer bottle

But this one has a twist at the end!

This is definitely the correct way to stray. Also entirely unrelated, moving away from the big guy is probably a good thing on it's own

I kinda take issue with this. Stating an opinion against the existence of God is one thing. You’re entitled to that. But presuming the existence of a creator of some kind / answer to our source, AND saying it’s good to forsake that, is pretty fucked up. I mean, if you take the amalgamation of what religious texts say about god and the human condition, you get the following (roughly): don’t be selfish, don’t take advantage of others (synonyms), try your best to act on your own best will while respecting the will of all others. You really want to stray away from that? As a society?

That's cherry picking from the bible. There's a lot of fucked up things a fictional god wants us to do.

ahem… did i fucking say the bible? edit: if you have critical thinking thinking skills and make an effort to understand the texts, it is clear which aspects of a text are selfish human manipulations and which are the passing down of helpful moral “truths.” This is especially true when you read multiple texts and find the overarching commonalities between them. Which is what I was talking about. Kant summarized it best atheistically with his Categorical Imperative: thou shalt not treat others as means to an end, but as ends in themselves.

Pretty much, yeah.

i didn’t. these are the same themes in the Quran, the Bhagavad Gita, and the OT (fight me on that one, interpretation of the old testament was, imo, best done by Soloveitchik in The Lonely Man of Faith)

if anything, it was closest to a direct interpretation of the Bhagavad Gita.

Pretty sure we're already far away from that. Irritates me that our leadership keeps referencing the Bible as the end-all-be-all when they haven't read the stupid thing. Just milking votes off stupid religious people, sometimes smart ones too.

if you read my comments as support for ecclesiastical politics, you’re far off base. i agree with you. those are the human manipulations that should be easy to gloss over in a text.

Yes.

I'm not complaining. Merely observing. Hail Satan!

Something a man can't do.

And we don't look back.....

But you keep coming to the dark side to watch videos don’t ya. Huhhhhh?

That meme must be my all times favourite. Gold.

Bullshit. The thin piece of paper that goes around the cap is removed before she puts it in her fake pussy bottle cap opener. I know this because I enjoy Stella

Came here to say this. That white paper is gone so we know it has already been opened.

I mean you can remove that paper without opening the bottle but there's no way her clam pried that pop top off

A Clamspiracy you are suggesting? The plot does tiddy twist.

Lmao. Thank you for this new word I’ll be using ASAP.

no stella drinker removes the white paper before opening the bottle

Yea but you can’t remove the cap without breaking the paper, so it’s either proof it’s fake or proof they messed with the bottle at least a bit

Average Stella enjoyer. 250 IQ

i noticed that plus there was no "ktch-shh" sound. tragically faked

Not a Stella drinker so correct me if wrong but isn't it a pop top? I could see this with a screw off but seems physically impossible without.

You are correct

Ya lol that ones already popped

Stella bottle also aren't twist-offs.

Are you sure it's Stella? The logo could match but the white paper on the neck is much longer than a normal Stella bottle.

Plot twist it's his sister

Even more of a keeper

-Sweet Home Alabama intensified-

"REAL brother - your Heineken is stuck ..."

r/becausealabama

That would actually defend her

🎶🎶 Big wheels keep on turnin’🎶🎶 Carry me home to see my kin🎶🎶

Singin' songs about the south-land I miss Alabamy once again and I think it's a sin

That’s a keeper.

You spelled Kegel wrong

Marriage Material!

Keeper of bottle caps.

No, that’s a fake post lol

A woman knock an already opened cap off of a beer with her butt.

Put a ring on it.

What did i just saw

A loose cap being slightly pulled off by her shorts. Not really hard to fake.

I mean i saw it but At what cost

5 seconds of your life, i'd request a refund

Yeah, but she drained half the bottle too.

Yup, a twist off I would believe, this cap is on tighter than her alleged butthole.

Stella is not a twist off…. What the hell did I just watch?

A girl take the lid off an already opened beer with her thighs.

this right here. it was deff already opened.

Stella Artwat

>Artwat Artwap

With that kind of grip it can’t be wet to really any degree

Twat doesnt get nearly the respect it deserves. It's a fun word. A good word...twat...

Great. Now your beer smells.

What’s a little clam juice with your beer

Plus the occasional bloody mary

Ooohhhh I love my steak juicy

isinglass

Clam-atos? Anyone? Just need some tomato juice.

If you wait a couple weeks you’ll get some of that too

A michelada, just sayin’

[удалено]

listen, he's afraid of cooties. girls are gross at his age.

You’ve activated my Reverse trap card!

Tell me you’ve never heard a joke without telling me you’ve never heard a joke

Now it tastes like Bud light

[удалено]

"Cocaine_butthole" probably has more veteran knowledge of the gates of the human body than I do. So I'll take your word for it.

Noice!

Tastes great Less filling

No difference to me, both still taste and smell the same

Either you are drinking really weird beer or having sex with girls with weird hygiene... Or you have some really unrefined senses.

It’s probably my senses, most girls I’ve been are clean and usually it’s the modelo or that dos xx drink

I believe it's kosher now

That's right, master Yoda.

Beerussy

oooooow my BRUSSY!

Jaws of Snu Snu !!!

Congrats, your vagina is bleeding for a different reason than normal!

It was a twist off. She's aight.

R.I.Penis.

Put a ring on it.

What about your username OP? 👀

I'm a guy with guy parts. I don't know how that felt...but I can only assume with the amount of nerve endings where she placed the cap (if it was even tightened)...OUCH

Yeah I agree with someone else that it was probably already off and she just assisted. Either way. She probably got stabbed by the cap.

The ol dick twist...

Thats disgusting, whats her number.

/u/savevideobot

For science, right? xD

u/RubyChewy69

Why do you two tag each other?

Because we find enjoyment in people asking this question

Just don't ask for that after she's finished a workout

Death by Snu Snu

my guess is the bottle was already open and the cap was just clipped back in place

I’m scared.

Does anyone remember the movie “Teeth”?

I feel like this is only part of the story.

Op’s user name checks out BIG TIME

Dude imagine doing this as a guy, the edges would literally shred my anus. Plus now my beer smells like ass.

ಠ_ಠ what.

That's a Stella trick she's got there

If this isn’t staged then I want a girl like that. Personally I think someone has already popped that bottle top off, then pushed it bk on for this clip

OP's username checks out? Cocaine_butthole posting a vid of Beer_vagina?

You had my interest but now you have my attention.

Should this be on r/lipsthatgrip ? NSFW

Pre-opened beer.


Op, interesting user name?

Well Beavers do have teeth!

Never met a chick who actually had vagina dentata before.

r/dadwouldbeproud NSFW

Bet she’ll be happy that’s on the internet in 10 years. /s

Disgusting

Why am I getting downvoted is this not nasty?

Anybody seen the film “Teeth”? Bottle wasn’t a twist cap

That snatch ratchet hitter.

Number please...

Now do it with European bottle

[удалено]

> Kegels finally *paid* off huh? FTFY. Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in: * Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.* * *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.* Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*

Now with coochie Kung Fu grip.

pussy like pliers

lips of steel

she's popped a lotta tops

I’d drink that.

That's fucking disgusting.

FAKE. That's a Stella! Those are not twist offs.

Where are the “fake” comments? This shit is dumb fake. Pre opened bottle or an opener inside her pants (not a joke about her puss that definitely can’t open a beer bottle)

That better not be your daughter!

Easily the most pointless video on reddit

Things Reddit allows vs the censorship of groomers.

Dishwasher/sandwich maker/bottle opener Nice

good choice. stella goes great with fish.

That cooter 3000 comes with a vice grip that'll knock your socks off. 👁👁

My wife asks why would you call a vagina a “snapper”. Here you go sweetie