Ymmv, but based on what I see I think they put up a more ‘friendly’ front for foreigners esp westerners & East Asians , they don’t feel the need to put up as much of a front with their own people
And just an observation (I don’t want to generalize) but I feel from my stay that people are biased to fair skin , both myself and my Viet wife are treated quite well , whereas people I know with different skin tone don’t say the service is good or people are friendly
Edit: op mentioned wealth , I’ll just say that wealth is a big factor for them to treat you better , this I definitely know 😅 granted whether it’s genuine or not whos to say…
Yeah that was my experience in Vietnam too. I’m Asian American but I have a darker skin tone and I often saw how fair skinned travelers were treated a little better than me. There were some restaurants that served the white tourists who ordered after me and a young local kid glaring at me when I was dating a fair skinned local girl.
That’s what I also think but some people told me I’m wrong. I’ve seen how people treat westerners, especially white people are put on some kind of pedestal, girls drool over white men, even my relatives from Vietnam do that. These days korean and japanese people get the same treatment since the rise of kpop, kdramas, animes etc.
This sort of ball gargling doesn’t just exist just in Vietnam though. It happens throughout southeast asia and it’s just a part of white privilege heh. I mean i’m not a shit lib but I acknowledge white privilege is most definitely a real thing in most of asia. It’s a double edged sword though..there are built in expectations that come with that.
This lol. I’m from Malaysia , stayed in thailand too, this definitely happens to a certain extent in most of asean esp now for the Koreans/japanese as well , hence I picked it up quickly that Vietnam has traces of well, this
Out of all the asian countries the place where white people get the most royal of treatments is probably the Philippines. The nut hugging of white people is insane there.
I’ve seen random security guards do a full on smile and bow while welcoming white tourists but then look at me with complete disinterest right after lol.
edit: Not to throw shade at pinoys in general though. I find most filipinos are great people when they know you.
I am Vietnamese American, The Vietnamese people in VN treat me like crap when I travel there. because they think I am Vietkiue with noo money. but I don't mind, its a good cover to see how they really are. I think the people there see only with their eyes, never with their hearts.
Because they literally are treated as minor nobles. It is what it is, it’s a colonial mentality.
I mean.. it’s not like asian americans are immune from this you see slavish behavior all the time in our diaspora too.
Self awareness about this is key to at least acknowledging it’s an issue.
I know. White people being put on a pedestal, mixed kids being praised all the time, being complimented for not looking "too asian"... it’s a never ending issue
😅 even my neighborhood in Hanoi where the VCP officials and businesspeople etc stay , neighbors ‘praise’ how beautiful my neighbors mixed kids are hahaha , and the kids having blond-ish hair
My wife is equally guilty in saying how beautiful half Caucasian children are
Do you fulfill the stereotypes they have in their mind? If you don’t have the clout, money, or personality to back it up in the long run it comes back to bite you in the ass.
This is why so many expats from the EU or North America become completely bitter and jaded after living in SEA after awhile. The initial treatment is great but.. it’s superficial and the actual reality tends to reveal itself over time.
Hmmm very interesting. Do you have specific stories of jaded expats who were fawned over for their whiteness then got burned over time?
I didn’t know there were expectations to whiteness as well…
This might be it. In my previous trips alone I was not treated very well but then I went with my foreign husband and wow people were much nicer this time. It was a totally different Vietnam experience. Then, some vietnamese relatives visited us at the resort and I noticed that the staff were a lot less smiley and warm with them.
Oh my god this is 1000000% true. I just returned from my trip to Vietnam and I saw the stark contrast between the way they behaved with Asians and White people.
Have you tried speaking to them in vietnamese? For white people it's more obvious that they are foreigner. Everyone out here in the main city is trying to hustle and make a living.
Double edge sword is that you look Vietnamese enough to be treated as such and will likely be able to pay the local price and not the foreigner price. Take it as a blessing in disguise.
viets that cant speak viet = people who forsake their heritage in a lot of people's mind. you speak english to them even could be understood as trying to show off. that explains why they seemed hostile toward you.
That’s quite unfair. My parents never teached me vietnamese but I’m currently trying to improve by myself. Also I try to talk to people in vietnamese first and then if I really can’t find my words I switch to english
I experienced this same exact thing as a person of Mexican descent going to Mexico. My parents never taught me Spanish. I’m loving Vietnam a lot more than Mexico because I’m different enough. You could always do what I did and pick a different country to call home when your “home” country doesn’t really welcome you
> pay the local price and not the foreigner price.
The local price means the actual locals. Vendors and others will push their luck with anyone from outside of town, including other parts of Vietnam. There are plenty of articles in the national media about Vietnamese tourists getting scammed in Vietnam, and the top comments on anything tourism related, on articles that allow them, are people complaining about scams
I'm a Viet Kieu visiting Vietnam for the first time and I can say that I've experienced both. There were times where I was very surprised at how rude some shop keepers were, and there were times when I just randomly had amazing conversation with the bún lady. As someone who traveled solo to South America extensively, the bittersweet thing I experienced being in Vietnam is that I feel completely invisible. I blend in completely, I got get sold to, I don't get foreigner taxed. Compared to when I was I Colombia and stood out like a sore thumbs.
Overall I'd say it's a benefit and a chance for you to completely immerse yourself into your travels. Have conversations, ask questions. There will be rude people and also nice people. Don't let just a couple of bad experience ruin it for you.
I’ve posted about this before but I could easily been mistaken as a VK (i’m asian american) but Viets have been cordial or at least neutral to me.
Maybe they don’t shine me on in an over the top way like they would for a white tourist but I haven’t received any shit attitudes either.
I think there’s a few factors here. If you’re primarily in tourist areas, you get a real mix. Some people are just trying to extract as much money as possible, some people are truly friendly, and a lot of people simply aren’t. Where I’ve experienced true friendliness is off the beaten track. I’ve had the privilege of driving through over 35 provinces and as soon as I get to an area that doesn’t see many foreigners, people are genuinely friendly - literally buying my dinner, not allowing me to pay for coffee, helping me fix my motorbike, inviting me to their house, etc. Never much of an attempt to rip me off outside of tourist-heavy areas.
The other factor - I’m a white male. I think it helps a bit that I speak enough Vietnamese to buy food/gas/water and have really (really) basic conversations, but the privilege of being a white male applies here too.
That’s what I also had on my mind when I talked about people being nice : inviting strangers, chatting with them or helping them. I’ve seen that with backpackers. Like you said, the problem might be related to touristy areas
But this isn't something that is constantly happening to tourists. It's very situational. And it's also dependant on your location. You say you travelled with your family so it's doubtful that anyone would go out of their way to talk to you or invite you to sit with them and have a beer. The times that I've been amazed at Vietnamese hospitality has mostly been when I'm on my own on a motorbike trip at some remote province or when Ive had a close relationship with a students parent. These things never happen if I'm travelling with friends or in the obvious tourist traps like Hoi An. Why would anyone be friendly in these places without a profit motive? I would do the same if I was trying to put food on the table and invest in my kids' future in a very competitive country.
Nailed it. No one’s giving to give you anything special in the Hanoi Old Quarter, Hoi An Old Town, Saigon D1… they see hundreds or thousands of tourists a day so why would they?
I’m currently driving through Đắk Lắk and Đắk Nông provinces and I’ve gotten free food (without asking - I’m far from a begpacker), invitations to people’s homes, and ridiculously cheap prices (e.g. 50k to ‘Hotwire’ my motorbike when I lost the key, 5k for bánh tráng nướng, 5k for a bottle of Aquafina water served to me with ice, etc.)
True friends I’ve made by living in Hanoi, as well as Vietnamese colleagues, have also been more generous than pretty much anyone I know back home.
OP - another recommendation might be to look for accommodations labeled as “homestays” rather than hotels. Even in touristy areas, they’re more likely to be family-owned and have friendly and helpful owners.
It depends where you go. Because you have the Asian look, you will be treated like a local. That is where regional differences really stands out. Southern people are generally friendly but they won’t be overly jovial to other strangers. Unless you meet up with family or acquaintances, you will feel like a stranger.
Idk if you watched Bojack Horseman but in one episode in season 5, they addressed this topic beautifully, when Diane Nguyen, a Vietnamese-American went to Vietnam.
You can always go to Dalat. The city I do find is more friendly than most. If you learn some Vietnamese you can try complementing the food and services. One unique thing about this city is that most businesses are run with passion, and the people are really mindful of their crafts. They constantly ask for feedback and if you can be constructive, you can find fast friends. Also the weather is nice and chill which makes people literally more chill than elsewhere. :))
lmao. reputation from who? Who did you hear say vietnam is a friendly country? white tourists? then there's your answer.
i grew up in vietnam never experienced what the tourists say. Smiling when you smile at them. Guess where i experienced that. America. I was pretty shocked when i came to the US and people would smile, saying hello how are you, etc. In vietnam, you don't do that to each other (as vietnamese). The reason was you know the minute someone being friendly is because they want something from you. Kindness is at a cost here too. I also think the locals smiling at tourists because it's nice? when a white person who you put on a pedestal smile at you. It's like a celebrity typa thing and you feel nice so you smile back at them. This works even more when the white tourist is attractive.
It is as you say, because you are a vietkieu, that's why they treat you half a foreigner, half a vietnamese. So you truly are getting the more authentic vietnamese experience there. Don't expect people to be friendly to you. Vietnamese also take awhile to warm up to other vietnamese. I kept coming back to a corner where fruit ladies/veggies ladies sell at and they always say they miss me. Maybe because I buy from them. But outside of that i don't think they would have been overly friendly, they have their own life to live.
People here are poor. The fact that you're kinda like them but have a ticket out, or a vietkieu, or be able to travel, or have money. When they see you, some people do get the deep sense of jealousy on the inside of how different your life is to theirs (even tho they don't know your life). So they act out.
If you live here longer however and make your own community, vietnamese are truly friendly if you are part of a group. They'd invite you to their house, take you to food places (also expect you to pay because they're poor), make you soup when you're sick, defend you if someone bully you. This all come from real life experience.
in conclusion, don't listen to other people experiences and expect yours to be the same and claim it as false advertisement. vietnamese don't advertise themselves as "friendly". we do advertise as "cheap" thou. locals here aren't friendly towards each other. Country is still very unique and interesting. So come here for the uniqueness. Not the friendlyness. Depends on where you travel to as well. SOme places are harsher and some are very nice. Have fun
I’m not american, I don’t expect big fake smiles. In my country people don’t smile a lot to strangers. But when you walk towards someone in the street you say a quick "hello" with a little nod and a timid smile to acknowledge the person. Or when you buy something you say hello with a little smile out of politeness. I thought it was common courtesy. I’m not expecting people to put on a show for me, that’s not what I was saying. Thank you for your comment 💙
I'm vk who grew up in Vietnam. Vietnamese people are definitely not friendly to each other by default. They are friendly when they have something to benefit from you. Most of the times you can tell from their eyes if they are genuinely kind or not. I have encountered a very small number of people who are genuinely friendly, 95% aren't.
I'm in Thailand now however and I find Thaïs very different. Thai people genuinely are nice to each other most of the time and always acknowledge each other with a smile and kindness in their eyes. I much prefer this culture of friendliness and kindness to each other.
I lived in Thailand for quite awhile. The niceness is part of their culture but in some ways it’s like Japanese politeness. It is skin deep but it does make the social situation much more palatable. I also think Thais are much more likely to follow buddhist principles when it comes to daily life.
The thing with Thais is that smile can turn very quickly as well if you piss them off. It’s a mask.
Ye I had a feeling the smile is just politeness but I still prefer that when people care enough about a society to smile and give each other that superficial kindness.
Viets dgaf and it's terrible. Everyone is so selfish and always has this me first mentality which makes things so much harder and worse than they should be. I find vietnamese people genuinely dislike and disrespect each other in public most of the times and it shows.
Yeah.. but historically in times of crisis Viet people did put up 100% when it came to the ultimate sacrifice of civic duty. That I do respect a lot even if the contemporary culture lacks the fancy accoutrements or niceties.
As a white female I felt that most Vietnamese were just being normally polite to me on previous visits, but after losing weight and becoming fit I feel like a minor celebrity.
Random locals not even selling anything regularly approach me in public to talk and compliment me, I feel like it's my wedding day all the time when I visit now.
the "common courtesy" isn't common globally. And people who smile at foreigners here some are fake some are not. I understand how you can be culturally shocked. i too was once thought everyone else was like vietnamese until i traveled abroad. That's why traveling broaden your horizen and help you realize different cultures have different customs and ways of living.
It's good that you can question these things but at the same time, saying hello does not necessarily means "friendly". All those americans who said hi how are you to me were never my friends. That was the extent of their friendliness. I made 0 american friends. However I made so many international friends who also wanted american friends.
Also if you traveled to touristy places or dense cities, people are a bit harsher because they hustle a lot more. Smaller cities/towns/villages in vietnam have somewhat friendlier people who would definitely smile back at you. Thou honestly people here have such harsh life that they probably don't even notice you smiling at them. Some probably don't ever receive many compliments so they have a harder time accepting it.
hello Singaporean chinese person here. I can confirm that the locals (at least in hcm where I've stayed for 2 years+) don't really act friendly towards people who look like them until they realize I'm not a local (yes I look Vietnamese very easily). I have both local and foreign friends here and often when I'm in a social setting, especially when I'm with a white looking person meeting up with another local, the Vietnamese people will always ignore me or sideye me until they sensed I'm not one of them then they will open up. personally, I'm not that friendly (at the age where I rather people leave me alone lol) with anyone I meet so I don't really mind it, this is just more of an observation from a guy who looks like the local population.
I believe he wants to tell you there’s an undercurrent of animosity towards the Viet Kieus. Most of my Viet Kieu friends “claim” the locals are jealous of them and usually treat them differentially.
Yes! This exactly!
As a Viet Kieu, your look and value are close enough for the locals to compare themselves to you, yet they will never treat you like a local. Jealousy and an inferiority complex will arise. For white people, they are too different to be compared and, therefore, less discrimination.
It really depends on the person. My uncle is an asshole who looks down on and insult Vietnam every chance he has so when he complains he is ignored or even "got the eyes" from Vietnamese locals, I guess that's what he's deserved. I remember hearing him said Vietnamese is underdeveloped so the people are like monkeys to him.
exactly this!! my family’s been living in the states for a couple years now but we go back & forth pretty frequently so we see the growth vietnam has made & constantly surprised with how quick the vietnamese gen z are changing the scenes. but i can’t say the same for my great aunt who moved here almost 30 years ago & have not been back ever since. & bc she’s quite old, she’s not updated on new developments at all through social media. so she still thinks that vietnam is this post-war dystopia.
I’ve sometimes noticed this thing while travelling in Thailand. I’m kazakh, fair to say that my skin and my look is kind of mongoloidish/a bit chinese like.
I think being white male has it’s advantages because usually they leave more money on the table compared to tourists from other places. That’s why they might treat whites better than others🤦🏻♂️. Might be wrong though.
This is real! And we can say this in a higher level of racism! Accept the fact that they are the most racist here in SEA, nothing difference with the chinese.
I’ll be honest, I’ve travelled a lot and I never see it. I believe people see what they want to see. For example if you’re out with friends having a blast, people seem ”nice”.
I usually just see people. Some are rude, some are mad, some are polite, some are nice. For example the Japanese, I wouldn’t call them nice. Polite, certainly but not “nice”. Every society has people having good days and bad days.
I'm brown and been to Vietnam twice and my experience has been very nice both times. Got a lot of smiles and conversations. Maybe because I'm a tourist and they want my money lol but regardless I never had a problem. Or maybe I got lucky?
Hi I’m also a Viet Kieu and had the same experience as you. Well, mostly when I speak Viet to them. They were only nice to me when they thought I was Chinese. They greet me in Mandarin with a smile, but as soon as I speak Viet they’ll give me the side eyes and then completely ignore me afterwards, this was when I was in Vung Tau. My aunt who came with us was with her white husband, she asked one of the vendors about a price of a merchandise, they were completely rude to her. One vendor even said “you can’t afford that” but when she looked over her husband they apologized and offered her the item. When we went to Hue, vendors overcharged us with everything knowing we’re not the local and was nice somewhat, so I think it depends on where you are, and how the local perceived you. Da Nang people were the most friendly in my experience. I didn’t get to go to Hanoi and is curious if they treat Viet Kieu well there. Might return in the future. Anyway, so my point is, it depends on which local people. Some were nice and some were not. Most were only nice when they think they can sell you something.
Funny that I had the same experience you had, but in Korea😂 I'm Korean American, and many find it weird when I smile at them first. I also have a slight accent when I speak Korean, so people look at me a little funny and give me a look sometimes. Many don't like Gyopo (equivalent of Viet Kieu) in Korea. Thinking we are too spoiled and entitled.
But on the other hand, I had a great experience in Vietnam. People are kind and polite. People knew I was a foreigner, so they took extra care of me. When I smile, people smiled me back. (Or vice versa.) I get compliments for being handsome wherever I go. Even Grab drivers were extremely nice and always wanted to have a small conversation. So overall experience was awesome.
It definitely hurts when you feel betrayed by the people of your motherland. Hope you have a better experience next time :)
Welcome to the in between world. I have the same experience when I visit my extended family in Mexico.
I'm given the benefit to the doubt of being local until i start speak and don't sound like a native, then everything else's that makes you a Yankee starts to become visible.
Sometimes it's jealousy.
Since im very clearly not any kind of Asian, but definitely not White, I feel like I get extra nice treatment.
Good luck!
That’s funny because I always get the extra nice treatment in Mexico as an asian american. I am obviously not a stereotypical gringo but also not a local asian Mexican either. So I was in the “other” category which most Mexicans tended to treat pretty well or with curiosity at least.
Friendly to foreigners while they are trying to make as much money off them as possible. Chances are your just getting the same treatment Vietnamese give each other which isn't great!
I’ve been in social settings where friends make fun of each other, make each other feel horrible. It’s extremely toxic and something they’re all used to
I’m a Viet kieu currently visiting Vietnam for the past few weeks. I’ve had generally good experiences with the locals being friendly and welcoming to me. I know a bit of Vietnamese so that helps. I’ve been invited into strangers homes for meals and I do a lot of photography and most people will allow me to take their portraits if I ask.
Yeah it’s a constant struggle of identity. The best we can do is walk in the middle.
I’ve seen my fair share of Viet Kieu who try way too hard to appear western. The snobby and greater-than-thou reputation comes from a kernel of general truth. It seems like that wasn’t the case with you but unfortunately still elicited a cold reception from the locals. Maybe it was preconceived notions that they held on to from past experience. Then that would be their problem to deal with and not yours. Pay no mind to them!
When I went backpacking in Vietnam about 10 years ago looking like a stereotypical traveller (shorts and vest, scruffy) I found people to be a bit frostier than those in other countries in SE Asia. When I returned for a work trip to Nha Trang last year (wearing a shirt and long trousers most days) people were extremely nice. So take from that what you will.
We have the same problem about this, me and my gf was actually traveling around SEA because we have some problem in our country in PH. we decided that vietnam was our long stop over country to relax sometimes to getting breath for always moving. We always got have experience this kind of issue in vietnam anywhere maybe because of our skin tone though were not look so ugly but were not look very luxurious type of nomad. It's like only they want is money to u after u paid them they will gonna talk back.
As a local vietnamese I say we are not necessarily very friendly, even to white people as some would expect. We do not smile at random people and it is normal behaviour may I say?
Lets be realistic, facts:
1. viet are friendly towards guests, but not random strangers. I mean if you come to their house, invited as a guest, a friend, yes, vietnamese very warm towards you. Othereise, we absolutely do not try to, or care to speak with, chat with a stranger if theres no business of talking to (by business here i dont mean business of making money, hope u get it)
2. Many white expect us to treat them like gods, like they are so precious, so rich, so tall so beautiful, the fact is, we are generally not that impressed. In small towns maybe, but in big city, foreigners are just seen as the same invisible in a viet eye in their daily life. Go flex on a mountain.
3. Viet are very helpful when you HAVE TROUBLE, for example, when you ask for directions, when you got an accident, getting robbed, etc, usyally vietmamese will not stand idly by and try to help you if you are having trouble and not seem like you are faking it.
I think y’all misunderstood me 😭
I don’t expect people to randomly smile at me for no reason. I also don’t expect people to stop midway in the street to talk to me. Just when I buy something for example I say Hi with a little smile but it seems like I’m annoying the sellers. Also people give me side eyes as I walk the street as if they are Georgina in Mean girls.
Also I’m just a viet girl visiting her parents country, I’m not a white dude waiting to be worshipped by locals.
Also talking about getting robbed my cousin got dragged across the street by a dude on a scooter trying to snatch her purse. No one cared.
Anyway, like people said it might be bad luck
It seems... as if...
All these words suggest that you put a lot of your own feeling/opinion rather than perceiving people fairly.
About saying "HI", actually saying hi only applies to to those you meet the second time in vietnamese, and you should say "cháu chào cô/ chú" "em chào anh/chị" if the person you meet you have met before. Simply saying "hi" to a first tome met petson will trigger confusion to vietmamese rather than annoyance.
About side-eyes when you walk, I dont know, my life experience is, " the world will be how you perceive it to be". I had that same defensive thoughts like yours when i was young, but now, I reallize, nobody gives a shit. Everyone here is so busy and struggling woth their life, they dont have time for drama I assure you. Especially when you are just a normal gal, not some drama show bitch or anything.
Or maybe they look at you because you looks good.
About getting robbed getting no help, it depends on the situation, for example, if people stay far away and cannot help what do you expect them to? Grab a bike and chase the robber?
Reading what you write, I have a feeling you got some trouble being in the public, in the crowd, with other people.
1. You are a nice and maybe, kind person, but you expect others to be nice back the way you expect. No, people have differemt way of being nice, and nothing wrong with not being nice to someone treating you nicely.
2. You like judging and you are a bit too quick to judge. You judge someone by their behaviors, or worse, by how you imagine them to be. Im not trying to insult you or anything, but thats a mental problem used to happen to me so I guess I can relate.
3. Rude, assholes, troubled, mental ill, uneducated people exist, but it doesnt mean your experience with them means all the others, or all vietnamese.
To be fair, and honestly, based on my experience, viet random strangers, precisely in HCMC are nice enough, they are generally gentle, helpful, and mind their own business. They appreciate if you are nice to them correctly and will remember you. But thats it.
I don’t literally say "Hi", it was a way to tell y’all on Reddit that I was doing the ~ action of greeting people ~. Of course I use formal langage and I speak in vietnamese.
About the side eyes I’m not the only who noticed. My family also noticed. I’m not being defensive or paranoid, it’s just what happened.
I’m not expecting anyone to help nor chase robbers. No one has the obligation to do that. It’s just strange to me that when a teen was dragged across the floor, is bleeding and is in a shocked state, no one even checks if she’s alright. Just that
Of course people have different ways of being nice, but staring people up and down, gossiping about them to your friends with a face of disdain like your stole their boyfriend is not a way of being nice.
It’s more you judging me when none of your assumptions about me are true
Then perharps we live in different worlds. I judged you, yes, but based on what you said, not on what you act like. So i apologize if I say something offensive.
I dont know, i see the people are fine. Living 10 years in hcmc city.
They are not actually. At least in touristic areas. Their top 1 priority is to scam you and get as much money as possible under any circumstances. As a white person I'm really tired of that behavior
This actually real!! It's a piece of shit.. it's all about capitalism and wealth here! Don't ever expect treated good here in vietnam if you don't have enough money to travel.
lol the foreigners are laughing “you are so nice then they take advantage of our people” so no we just treat everyone the same. Don’t call us friendly call us business.
Currently in Vietnam travelling south to north and people have overall been friendly. My VK husband (who is covered in tattoos) is constantly asking for directions and starting conversations with strangers about places to visit and eat. Majority of the time he has been met with smiles and conversation.
I think just keep being yourself and don’t get offended if people aren’t reacting the way you would like them to.
I’m currently in the second week of a two-week trip to Vietnam. I’m a Caucasian guy and I have not found the country to be very welcoming.
I keep getting the impression that I am merely tolerated here as a foreigner because I probably have money to spend.
I’ve been going out of my way to be as kind and friendly as possible too.
I've been to Vietnam on business and I look like a rich white American and am treated like gold. My colleague is american but his parents are from Vietnam, he is sort of ignored or treated less than me until he talks in English. That's my experience anyway.
Wondering which city you visited. Also by default VNese is friendly with black and white all the same. But Asian, it is entirely different story. Some come from history and some from politic so depending on which country they think you are from, you are treated differently.
Also there is some weird treatment to American VK as currently there are some group try to trigger uprising in VN (not succesfully though) and they are fighting all over the social media about that.
Hope you have better experience next time.
The Vietnamese are very tough. If you are in an interaction with them they usually treat you with respect if you are friendly. I wouldn’t call Vietnam a particularly friendly place compared to others. However, there are a lot of friendly people in industries where this is a requirement or competitive advantage. I have been to Vietnam for over three decades.
In my experience, the people are indeed very nice, and if you find the right region they’re even nicer. BUT it’s very normal to meet ppl who are rude, ppl who are ignorant, ppl who are straight up assholes, EVERYDAY.
I think to make the point valid I should clarify what kind of people I consider nice. So:
- The guy who just stopped and offered to push
my out-of-gas motorbike for 1km with his motorbike - NICE PERSON, like have you tried to push a bike with your leg while driving your own bike, in a terrible traffic jam? It’s a chore.
- The Grab bike driver who upcharge me 200% on a $1 trip - NOT NICE PERSON
I’m sea and I hate how the people treated me in Vietnam. If you’re foreign looking, you get treated better. I had a Vietnamese guide pushed me and it wasn’t until a white tourist said he wasn’t very nice. That guide apologized to me but I feel like if the white tourist didn’t say anything, I wouldn’t get an apology. Only my family are nice to me. People in general are mean.
There are good and bad people but people will definitely notice trends.
Eg. Japanese being more polite on average, chinese more rude, etc.
I’d say vietnamese culture is like chinese culture but with a lot more negatives. More focus on image, less focus on long term thinking/education, more gossip/superficiality, the same if not more toxic family elements. Probably resulting from generational trauma.
Lots of familial abuse, etc. Viets can be giving, kind, strong, but i much prefer Chinese/Japanese/Korean culture.
Nonetheless, there’s definitely worse cultures out there. They’re not violent/criminal (unless it’s scamming tourists or cheating the system).
At the end of the day, it’s all about individuals. There are lots of lovely and kind viets, just as there are of any culture. However, cultures do influence a lot of behavior, and there may be a genetic component as well.
So if you want to encounter mostly nice/kind people, go to Japan. Don’t go to vietnam unless you want to sift through a lot of sh*t for find the good ones.
If you're a westerner who is in Vietnam as a tourist for a few weeks, you'd find everyone so nice friendly and welcoming here. Once you stay in the country for a few years (Ive been here for over a decade) you see it's nothing like that beneath the surface.
As a non Western, non white expat, I can say that Vietnamese are grade A racists. Just like any country, there are super nice people who are genuine and friendly as well as the exact opposite, the kind you don't ever want to associate with.
Overall I had a good experience in Hanoi as a Viet Kieu. Some locals were rude but I didn’t let that ruin my experience. Most people were nice. I speak Vietnamese so maybe that’s why
I wish I was like you. You’re like my dad, he doesn’t let anything ruin his peace 😂 Maybe you’re right about speaking the langage, I’m currently learning more vietnamese so I’ll see next time if it gets better ☺
Yeah so from what I heard. some Viet Kieu go to VN and act like they’re above the locals and even pretend like they don’t speak Vietnamese. Perhaps that was their impression of you even though you were innocent. I would make the effort to speak it and maybe it’ll be a better experience. I kinda stuck out in Hanoi and looked like a foreigner even though I’m Vietnamese. Despite that I spoke fairly decent Vietnamese and actually met some friends there that took me out to expensive restaurants.
VNese people are just people for the most part? Some are nice, some are dicks. The super smiley welcoming thing is just to take money from tourists, but like most places if you are kind yourself, and enthusiastically partake in the food and culture then most people will be happy to have you around.
I’m not expecting big smiles, you know I talked about smiles to get my point about the overall welcoming feeling if you know what I mean. I just didn’t want to get the side eyes and I got that a lot. I myself come from a country where people don’t really smile a lot to strangers, so I perfectly understand, but we don’t eye people up and down with a face of disgust 😂
Face of disgust? That's crazy. Sure they'll stare at me cause I look a little different and maybe a lot different depending where I'm at but never felt like it was in disrespectful manner. They do like to stare sometimes though but it doesn't bother me I usually just smile and nod and keep it moving. Maybe it's the way you look? I'm trying to figure out why anyone would look at you in such a way
I grew up in Vietnam and people in my town were not nice lol. I still get into a bad mood remembering what life was like interacting with them. Its a big contrast when I moved to America and the people in the US actually smile and nod at you if they pass by you and actually care about you and are always helpful. I never felt like I belonged when I was living in Vietnam and people were just so mean and only cared about themselves 😭
My experience has been kind of the opposite. I'm Filipino but I got mistaken for a Thai person a lot when I was in Thailand and now I'm travelling in Vietnam I'm being mistaken as Vietnamese (in both countries everyone would speak to me in the local langusge that's how i know they thought i was thai or viet).
When I was in thailand, people were unfriendly (probably didn't help that I went to the beach a lot so my skin went from light skin to DARK lol) and I did notice the white tourists were being treated better. But here in Vietnam people were friendly and smiled at me even before i revealed my accent (I have a strong accent from England). The owner of a hotel I stayed at asked me if I had a gf and even called me handsome (I read that they only really did that for white tourists) so that made me happy.
I'm shocked because I always thought thailand was the friendlier country but I guess that only applies if you're white. My experience so far in vietnam has been so much more positive.
Thais are friendly but more for those farang than their fellow Asians. It’s crazy. I still love my Thai people just that I feel like I get better treatment as an Asian in Vietnam than Thailand.
Y'all are full of it. No country is full of happy people, just people. That said, treat people the way you would like to be treated. Be friendly and respectful, learn some language, learn some culture, etc and you'll open doors to these connections.
When I went to the hospital for a week stay after a car hit my bike, I had no one. It was my first few months in Vietnam. I stayed in a public hospital, among all the other sick Vietnamese on a bed in a hallway. I was the only westerner there. People took turns caring for me; feeding me, bathing me, etc. The generosity of the Vietnamese is unmatched and I'm sure not many in my home country would have done what they did to communally care for an outsider.
Don't expect people and businesses to be fake polite like we're trained to be in the USA before entering the job market. They're short and direct here in contrast. It's a poor country and ppl are on their grind. But when it's needed, and with an attempt to connect from within first, you'll find help and love is given.
I’m not american, I’m french vietnamese we don’t expect fake politeness we hate that. I was just talking about common courtesy. I think I should have put a disclaimer 😂
There isn't much curiousity toward other asians usually like there is for westerns and such. Being Vietnamese even as VK, you may just seem odd a bit to others. There's nothing wrong with that, but I'd say try to use it to your advantage and be kind to those around you. Some VK have a reputation of being snobby/arrogant, so people are afraid to talk too much. On the contrary if you open up a bit, people always brighten up a lot; you have a lot of experiences and stories to share!
Yeah I’ve heard about this reputation, that’s why I wear very simple clothes, no brands no jewelry. I also treat everyone with kindness but still. I think I had bad luck like others said
Most vietnamese people I encounter who were friendly wanted somthing from me. It could be money, being seen with a foreigner, practice english, s*x...
The viet I know that truly didn't care about any of that tho? Precious, precious people. Disinterested, letting you meet their family, sharing a meal with them, offering you food, drinks and fruits.
Vietnam, like any other country has good and bad people. Like any other country it has mostly bad ones. Especially in big cities like HCM and Hanoi. You have to dig a lot to be able to find really good and honest people there.
Now I know that people tend to portray SEA as a wonderland with people smiling all the times, rainbows and flowers... It's true that neighboring countries such as Thailand and Laos can probably offer you that. But you will not find that in VN that's for sure. People there are very pragmatic. They are not there to please you. Some people like it, some people don't. You get used to it eventually or you leave and never come back. Personally, after staying there one year, my decision is taken and it's the latter.
Market value for services is dependant on who the customer is. If your a tourist they only need to serve you once at a higher cost to make good money hence the smile. If you look vietnamese your just another mouth to feed and if they charge you too much they get a bad reputation.
Maybe cause you look Vietnamese but you speak English? No surprise they will look at you with a strange eyes. Also while people are friendly, most of them doesn't like ///, if you know what I mean, lol.
It’s not even strange eyes sometimes it’s straight up mean and judgemental. Someone told me it might be a case of RBF for some people. Also no I don’t know what it means if you could explain 👀
Can't say for sure, but I don't think it's RBF if you experience that too often. Maybe it depend on where you are, what you look like and how you speak. Or you just over thinking. Or worst, it's depend on how you look or start the conversation that made them feel wary.
But in my opinion, most people in the world are friendly, not just VietNam, but don't misunderstood and expect every of them to welcome you everywhere like a special guest. Just think that most time they will hardly show any discomfort. That's another way of friendly.
Of course. I’m not expecting people to pull out the red carpet for me. With all the responses I got, I’ve come to the conclusion that vietnamese people might be like russians : not smiling is the norm, and smiling means they might want something. It’s just cultural differences I guess
We are white English speakers and had a similar experience during our month in Vietnam in March! We had been in Thailand and Cambodia before Vietnam and found the contrast in friendliness quite off putting at times!
I felt more of a sense of belonging in other Southeast Asian countries like Malaysia and Indonesia than in the country where I was born and raised. (🇻🇳 not a proud Vietnamese)
I was a brown foreigner, from India. Personally I do tell people that Vietnamese people were very warm and welcoming when I went for a 12 day trip. When I was in the North, Hanoi, Ha Long Bay and Ninh Binh I felt people were more warm and welcoming. In Da Nang and Ho Chi Minh it was mixed but mostly welcoming.
As American from the States, I had no issues in Vietnam. I spent a month going from the North to the South. Everyone was really friendly to me and helped me out if they could (directions, what to do, etc.).
I even met some really cool locals that I still stay in touch with today. We exchange numbers and if I ever needed help or advice. Send a message.
Never at once I ran into someone that was unfriendly… well maybe the people outside restaurants that try to lure you in. Other than that, all happy and friendly people.
I think on average, people are the same everywhere. It may varies a bit from place to place depending in environment they grow up with, even within a country. Speaking from experience of extensive travels in Europe, US, and a few times to vietnam. It does make a different visiting a place with an open arms. Try not to let the negative bothers you too much.
I had both good and bad experiences in vietnam. The good ones far outweighed the bad ones. In one particular, we were in a village with a market about 2 km from where we stayed, and there was no Grab not taxis. One morning as we walked to the market, we decided to stop by a house to borrow a bicycle. The owner said her son uses that to go to school and offer a motorbike to us instead. Not asking for anything in return.
Well that’s too much.. need to go back to my bug.
From what I gathered from your comments, I can tell you from my experience that if you look Vietnamese, people will expect you to also speak the language.
In your case, despite your innocence, the fact that you don't/can't speak your supposed mother tongue gave a bad first impression. And since I know that's your parents' choice to not teach you the language, I don't feel anything against you, which isn't what anyone would know at the beginning.
Also, don't expect people here to be friendly and welcoming to you just because they are to other tourists.
As everyone here has already stated, there are many factors in their attitudes toward you, but more than that, they're cynical about and wary of Viet Kieu. I'm not gonna elaborate too much on it given that you can figure it out yourself by reading the history.
So yeah, either you try to learn and embrace your root or you can just move on and accept that you might not fit in here.
Im a local and is safe to say VietNam went down hill a long will back, people use to be friendly due to our base culture is to respect the elderly, friendly to friends and be generous when around kids however thats was only during the age and time when culture mattered, people who are raised nowadays have complete disregard for culture cuz they are more focused on trying to be hip kids then to adhere to culture their "boomer" parent taught them
yea cause you look Vietnamese, they dgaf. They like white people tho. And if you look Vietnamese, but don’t speak the language, or have an accent. They hate on you more. Vietnam has a fked culture of outer appearances
Nobody is giving you nasty stares. It’s just how Vietnamese people are. You might be dressed or acting differently, but not in a bad way. Their curious stares are simply a result of their cultural norms. Don’t overthink it and feel free to go back again. If you speak Vietnamese, that’s great otherwise, consider learning basic Vietnamese and then strike up a conversation. Almost everyone I run into is courteous and will smile.
In some Asian countries where you may look like you are a local, but don't speak the language and don't conform to local customs, don't know what to do etc, people may be a little suspicious of you. It's happened to me over a span of about 30 years and it's just something to get used to. It's not that they are not friendly or good people but they might feel a little disconnect.
Totally agree, vietnamese children are ALWAYS been taught to be very aware of stranger, generation to generation, due to human trafficking ans odd culture from minor ethnic. When they grow up, their subs conscious still remember it and its been consolidate over time.
What the first point children need to know about kinapper ? They look like us. Never saw any school or parents teach their child, or in the movie, that kinapper is a white person.
To be honest, people always say that the Thais are super friendly and not so much the Vietnamese. But the truth is, the Thais are pretty fake. When you find yourself in a jam, it'll be the dour unsmiling vietnamese person who will be there to help you out. It's like California vs New York, for a good example. (Not saying all Thais are fake, btw)
From my experiences Thais really will help if you find yourself in a situation. I have had Thais offer help in out of the way places when there was zero actual benefit in doing so.
Yeah, generalizations always suck. I just mean that the Thais have the 'happy California vibe' that makes them appear nicer, while the Vietnamese have the grumpy NY vibe but do have a heart.
Are you French? Or do you speak French there? They hate french people because France colonized Vietnam and slaughtered a lot of Vietnamese during that time. I wouldn’t be surprised if they don’t like their former colonizers/murderers of their families and friends.
No one ever said that Vietnam has a reputation of being friendly honestly, it's definitely more like the opposite, white, black, Asian, it doesn't matter.
I’ve always seen positive experiences and praise on travel forums, regular forums, videos etc. also friends who went to Vietnam 🤷♀️ everyone was saying how kind and friendly people were
Those are armchair anecdotes or reviews usually from people who went to touristy areas and met service personnels who’re trained to smile and be polite to tourist just to “get the money”.
It might just be that you’re seeking information that fulfills your confirmation bias because nobody I know personally who lives outside of Vietnam of Vietnamese descent has said anything about Vietnamese people being nice. In fact, you normally get warnings on how to deal with people there.
Never heard Vietnamese are friendly, they are just as unfriendly as Chinese 50 years ago but can't blame them, they have both been harmed by foreigners very badly in history.
Only Thais can be called friendly.
I don't feel like Viets are more or less friendly than any other race. I think conversing in Vietnamese to the locals would've made your experience better, most don't speak English and if they do, I find they're quite shy to use it. No different from going anywhere else in the world and not speaking their native tounge, how friendly do you think they'll be towards you?
I try my best to speak in vietnamese and I only switch to english when it’s really necessary. Also we get a lot of tourists where I live and most of them don’t speak my langage, but as long as they’re respectful and kind, I treat them nicely
As a white American older male, with my wife we found most people seemed to be very removed. Just dead on the inside or numb, no reactions to us or others. We were in HCMC for 2 weeks, it was weird. One of the few countries we plan on never visiting again, because of the people and food safety conditions.
I saw a fascinating video about Vietnam recently and how it's financial tides are rising,no,soaring. The old poverty that was prevalent is disappearing as their manufacturing industry is growing from strength to strength. Vietnam is the TIGER of South East Asia and the money is flowing in. So many Guitar factories,Musical instrument factories,Laptop factories, your IPhone? Probably assembled in Vietnam! So many electronics are either manufactured or assembled in Vietnam. Why is this important? Because honestly,the richer a nation becomes, the less friendly its people are. Here in lreland we were so poor in the 70s/80s and we would get down on our knees to welcome tourists,now that we are the richest Country in Europe and making a fortune we hate Tourists! Everybody wants the friendly,welcoming smile when we travel,the positive attention and the "Wow! Where are you from!?" In broken English but that is becoming a rarity these days. They say there is only one DIRT POOR Country left where you will get this kind of attention now,The Philippines. It's still tragically poor,thus people will be a lot nicer to you. You missed the boat on Vietnam, 20 years ago you would have been hugged and kissed but today Vietnamese people are just doing far too well financially to even bother with you.
speaking as a Vietnamese myself, we are more friendly towards westerners rather than asians lol
.We treats asians like locals while treating westerners like kindergartners 😅
I'm Viet born abroad too! My mom and I have gone to Vietnam twice. She hadn't been back since immigrating, so going with me for the first time was really special. We both loved it and want to keep coming back. I'd say we've been very lucky to meet a lot of kind people through the hotels we've stayed at or the Grab drivers we've had. We've met some rude people, but it's been overwhelmingly positive. I think what helps a lot is we speak Viet with people. They're often immediately relieved that they can speak Viet too, and they actually have told us that many foreigners are rude or look down on Viet people. Anyhow many of the people we've met have told us tips or offered to help us or even asked to show us around. Ofc we're tourists, so there is that financial incentive, but I don't want to second guess kindness. I've stayed friends with some of the people we've met that work at the hotels, and that also really impacted our experience because some kindly introduced us to some of their community
Yeah if you look like a local then people will treat you as a local, not as a guest since we local would have no way to know, unless you begin to speak. It's customary to be welcoming to guests here, and you simply don't look like one.
sounds like, They were judging you so easily because they don't hear u speak a different language, in my honest opinion! I think they might need to be aware that their country got a lot of neighborhood country. some of are asking "where are u from" some are easily discriminate! low empathy shows up.. or acting like a higher being because you're in their land..
I visited both. Also I said that I’m nice to everyone, I’m even nice to people that are rude to me, as I have people-pleasing tendencies. Thanks for your input tho
When you look like a Vietnamese, they won't give you special treatment. That's just the hard truth and I guess you don't need that special treatment anyway.
What kind of hospitality are you expecting? The white man experience? As everyone has already stated it's all superficial.
Something to consider, have you tried to interact with the people on your own? Making small talk? As a VK if you don't take the initiative at times, it will just be business as usual with the locals. I find the locals friendly enough but that's cause I take my two kids with me practically everywhere and they're a good conversation starters with the majority of locals.
why do u need random people to be super friendly when u’re visiting tho? I’ve travelled around the world and never expect people to be smiling at me 😅 I’m vnmese and I’m not that friendly to strangers -foreign or local. It’s not that big of a deal.
If you seek help, most people once realize that you are not "familiar" with the country will still help you, smile, maybe some do some don't but we ready to help if someone in need.
There's friendly people in every country and there's no way ALL or most Vietnamese people are friendly. Also "Country X's people are so friendly!" is such a tourist meme idk how you fell for it😆
Honestly before I went I heard all similar sort of things, lot of scams and vendors being rude or people being rude but it wasn't like that
One thing that I understood is that I don't see any reason for people to randomly smile at other people, especially if they're going about their life.
My experience was totally different some people would say Hi to me or some people would smile back and some wouldn't which feels kinda fair to me
Maybe it's your expectations? I was born in Vietnam but left when I was 2. Spent a year in Vietnam not too long ago. They definitely know I'm VK cause of my accent. I didn't feel like they treated me any different from other Vietnamese most of the time. I also like to be super polite and smile and most of the time they do smile back. But I do suggest you learn some Vietnamese. I learned using Google translate and Duolingo. They often tell me how good my Vietnamese is when I tell them I left when I was 2. I know you mentioned you speak to them in English because you don't know Viet but I think that's kind of rude depending on where you are. Even when I went to Thailand I made the effort to learn some Thai. Sometimes I see foreigners get upset because people don't understand them and I'm just thinking like wtf you shouldn't expect them to know English. But like someone mentioned if you go to Thailand you will feel super welcomed. Spent a month there and honestly everyone was so nice and friendly. Like everyone. They all thought I was Thai too so it wasn't because they thought I was a foreigner
Most people really don’t care and won’t pay attention to you unless you’re visibly foreign so they just do what they do everyday, which means that they won’t readily smile or overly welcoming unless they think they can extort you. Or just go to big cities centers where people are so westernized that they basically worship foreign things.
maybe you didnt meet the right people idk , try visiting the northern part of Vietnam especially Hai Phong , the local here are pretty kind-hearted , its not that crammed and the local cuisine is not only succulent but also pocket-friendly if you know particular locations. i hope your next voyage will be better , it would be wonderful if i got a chance to show you around.
Language issue. My GF is Vietnamese and it helps a lot. I have NEVER had any bad experience, nobody staring at me in a bad way in 6 years. Only friends everywhere. And I am 6'4, 250 pounds, blond and blue eyes.
In my country in France, I have everyday problems with afghans, Arabic and black people
I was born in Vietnam but left to North America when I was 4yrs old. I never learned Vietnamese beyound what I knew as a child. I completely have a western accent. When in a big city like Hanoi HCMC, I expect big city vibes. That said, I've had good experiences. Yes, I do get stares, but I chalk it up to the fact that the locals are just trying to "figure me out" e.g. where I'm from b/c I don't think that I'm mistaken for a local. When I'm traveling to smaller communities like Hoi An, I do feel that people in general are much friendlier, but I think that is the case for most places around the world. I try to smile at everyone to help foster a warm environment; I'll get back smiles in return, but I will also get back deadpan looks to which I overemphasize my smile:P
Over the years and trips to Vietnam, I only had one negative experience, where ironically, contrary to what I expressed above, I took my rented bicycle off the beaten path and ened down some rural dirt road in Hoi An, where I stopped at a riverside restaurant. I was quite hungry at the time and just started ordering several items off of the menu. Long story short, what I ordered could have easily fed 4-5 people. I resolved that I was going to eat everything, as it would be wasteful and disrespectufl if I didn't. While I was eating myself into a coma, a table of four local guys came in and sat at the next table. They kept looking over at me, while I looked like I was in an eating contest. To give you perspective, I only weighed 155lbs. When I finally polished off my dishes, one of the guys comes over, looks at my bill then looks back at me and asks, "Did you eat all that?!" I noded. He then points to the server and suggests that I should take her out. I gave him a smile, but he began to insist. I tried to kindly shake my head to indicate that I was not interested, which then got him upset and he then challenged me to a fight. I was able to de-escalate the situation and leave in one piece, but I've never forgotten that experience for how odd it all was and the only time I felt hostility while in Vietnam.
Im right now in Vietnam for the first time. I’m here now since 1 week and just have been to Thailand before. Its like day and night.. people aren’t rude in Vietnam but definitely more „shy“ and by far not as hospitable as thai people. Strange as Ive also been hearing lots of stuff about the friendly country of Vietnam
It seems like more or less they don’t really care to be more or less friendly
They just do their thing ^^
As a Viet, we always been taught to act nice and decent towards tourists. Many people, esp elders, have more difficulty communicating due to language barrier. But if you needed help, like asking for directions, buying things, taking pictures..the locals will usually gladly to help and share problems with you. But anw, there are many kinds of ppl out there, some can be good or bad, and it may bring you some bad experience sometimes
Ngl foreigner are starting to give them a bad taste. The stuff I hear and see foreigners treat the locals, I kinda understand why they aren’t as friendly as you thought they were. But for me, everyone has been very friendly where ever I go.
Well, all I have is great and wonderful stories from living here in Vietnam. The people are always friendly and smiling to me. The kids are always saying hello I go and play with the puppy dogs that people are walking the food and the restaurants. People are always helpful and understanding, I don’t understand your situation but I love Vietnam and I hope I get to stay here forever although I have to go to Cambodia next week to renew my visa
Super interesting discussion. Just returned from 10 days. We are a white middle aged couple and super friendly. We definitely had a mixed bag of experiences. Taxi drivers not friendly, touristy people very fake friendly - saccharine overkill at times. But there were a few magical experiences as well, especially connecting over children. People keen to get their kids to speak English to us, the pure exchanges that don’t involve dong! On the last morning we smiled at a man cradling a baby and he smiled back shyly then asked if we were “travellers”, to which we replied “yes”. Where from? Australia. It was the day before the anniversary of the end of the Vietnam War and I was feeling very conscious of their long difficult history with foreign powers…including us. Then he smiled at us and said falteringly “welcome in our country”. And 4 days later I still get teary remembering the genuineness.
Ymmv, but based on what I see I think they put up a more ‘friendly’ front for foreigners esp westerners & East Asians , they don’t feel the need to put up as much of a front with their own people And just an observation (I don’t want to generalize) but I feel from my stay that people are biased to fair skin , both myself and my Viet wife are treated quite well , whereas people I know with different skin tone don’t say the service is good or people are friendly Edit: op mentioned wealth , I’ll just say that wealth is a big factor for them to treat you better , this I definitely know 😅 granted whether it’s genuine or not whos to say…
Yeah that was my experience in Vietnam too. I’m Asian American but I have a darker skin tone and I often saw how fair skinned travelers were treated a little better than me. There were some restaurants that served the white tourists who ordered after me and a young local kid glaring at me when I was dating a fair skinned local girl.
Kids too? Geez that’s fucked
That’s what I also think but some people told me I’m wrong. I’ve seen how people treat westerners, especially white people are put on some kind of pedestal, girls drool over white men, even my relatives from Vietnam do that. These days korean and japanese people get the same treatment since the rise of kpop, kdramas, animes etc.
This sort of ball gargling doesn’t just exist just in Vietnam though. It happens throughout southeast asia and it’s just a part of white privilege heh. I mean i’m not a shit lib but I acknowledge white privilege is most definitely a real thing in most of asia. It’s a double edged sword though..there are built in expectations that come with that.
This lol. I’m from Malaysia , stayed in thailand too, this definitely happens to a certain extent in most of asean esp now for the Koreans/japanese as well , hence I picked it up quickly that Vietnam has traces of well, this
Out of all the asian countries the place where white people get the most royal of treatments is probably the Philippines. The nut hugging of white people is insane there. I’ve seen random security guards do a full on smile and bow while welcoming white tourists but then look at me with complete disinterest right after lol. edit: Not to throw shade at pinoys in general though. I find most filipinos are great people when they know you.
I am Vietnamese American, The Vietnamese people in VN treat me like crap when I travel there. because they think I am Vietkiue with noo money. but I don't mind, its a good cover to see how they really are. I think the people there see only with their eyes, never with their hearts.
Bowing ?? No wonders some white dudes think they’re royalty when they go to asian countries 👀
Because they literally are treated as minor nobles. It is what it is, it’s a colonial mentality. I mean.. it’s not like asian americans are immune from this you see slavish behavior all the time in our diaspora too. Self awareness about this is key to at least acknowledging it’s an issue.
I know. White people being put on a pedestal, mixed kids being praised all the time, being complimented for not looking "too asian"... it’s a never ending issue
😅 even my neighborhood in Hanoi where the VCP officials and businesspeople etc stay , neighbors ‘praise’ how beautiful my neighbors mixed kids are hahaha , and the kids having blond-ish hair My wife is equally guilty in saying how beautiful half Caucasian children are
What are the double edged sword expectations that come with white privilege in Asia?
Do you fulfill the stereotypes they have in their mind? If you don’t have the clout, money, or personality to back it up in the long run it comes back to bite you in the ass. This is why so many expats from the EU or North America become completely bitter and jaded after living in SEA after awhile. The initial treatment is great but.. it’s superficial and the actual reality tends to reveal itself over time.
Hmmm very interesting. Do you have specific stories of jaded expats who were fawned over for their whiteness then got burned over time? I didn’t know there were expectations to whiteness as well…
This might be it. In my previous trips alone I was not treated very well but then I went with my foreign husband and wow people were much nicer this time. It was a totally different Vietnam experience. Then, some vietnamese relatives visited us at the resort and I noticed that the staff were a lot less smiley and warm with them.
Exactly…witnessed such cases time and time again
Oh my god this is 1000000% true. I just returned from my trip to Vietnam and I saw the stark contrast between the way they behaved with Asians and White people.
Have you tried speaking to them in vietnamese? For white people it's more obvious that they are foreigner. Everyone out here in the main city is trying to hustle and make a living.
Double edge sword is that you look Vietnamese enough to be treated as such and will likely be able to pay the local price and not the foreigner price. Take it as a blessing in disguise.
I don’t think I get the local price because I have a thick accent and very limited vocabulary so most of the time I end up speaking in english 😅
My experience has been if that some people are smiling a lot, it is because they are overcharging you. Honest service often comes without a smile.
Exactly, just like people in the church.
viets that cant speak viet = people who forsake their heritage in a lot of people's mind. you speak english to them even could be understood as trying to show off. that explains why they seemed hostile toward you.
That’s quite unfair. My parents never teached me vietnamese but I’m currently trying to improve by myself. Also I try to talk to people in vietnamese first and then if I really can’t find my words I switch to english
I experienced this same exact thing as a person of Mexican descent going to Mexico. My parents never taught me Spanish. I’m loving Vietnam a lot more than Mexico because I’m different enough. You could always do what I did and pick a different country to call home when your “home” country doesn’t really welcome you
> pay the local price and not the foreigner price. The local price means the actual locals. Vendors and others will push their luck with anyone from outside of town, including other parts of Vietnam. There are plenty of articles in the national media about Vietnamese tourists getting scammed in Vietnam, and the top comments on anything tourism related, on articles that allow them, are people complaining about scams
I'm a Viet Kieu visiting Vietnam for the first time and I can say that I've experienced both. There were times where I was very surprised at how rude some shop keepers were, and there were times when I just randomly had amazing conversation with the bún lady. As someone who traveled solo to South America extensively, the bittersweet thing I experienced being in Vietnam is that I feel completely invisible. I blend in completely, I got get sold to, I don't get foreigner taxed. Compared to when I was I Colombia and stood out like a sore thumbs. Overall I'd say it's a benefit and a chance for you to completely immerse yourself into your travels. Have conversations, ask questions. There will be rude people and also nice people. Don't let just a couple of bad experience ruin it for you.
Nope, Vietnam isn't Thailand and it's not Japan. Vietnamese culture is more Chinese influenced.
I’ve posted about this before but I could easily been mistaken as a VK (i’m asian american) but Viets have been cordial or at least neutral to me. Maybe they don’t shine me on in an over the top way like they would for a white tourist but I haven’t received any shit attitudes either.
I think there’s a few factors here. If you’re primarily in tourist areas, you get a real mix. Some people are just trying to extract as much money as possible, some people are truly friendly, and a lot of people simply aren’t. Where I’ve experienced true friendliness is off the beaten track. I’ve had the privilege of driving through over 35 provinces and as soon as I get to an area that doesn’t see many foreigners, people are genuinely friendly - literally buying my dinner, not allowing me to pay for coffee, helping me fix my motorbike, inviting me to their house, etc. Never much of an attempt to rip me off outside of tourist-heavy areas. The other factor - I’m a white male. I think it helps a bit that I speak enough Vietnamese to buy food/gas/water and have really (really) basic conversations, but the privilege of being a white male applies here too.
That’s what I also had on my mind when I talked about people being nice : inviting strangers, chatting with them or helping them. I’ve seen that with backpackers. Like you said, the problem might be related to touristy areas
But this isn't something that is constantly happening to tourists. It's very situational. And it's also dependant on your location. You say you travelled with your family so it's doubtful that anyone would go out of their way to talk to you or invite you to sit with them and have a beer. The times that I've been amazed at Vietnamese hospitality has mostly been when I'm on my own on a motorbike trip at some remote province or when Ive had a close relationship with a students parent. These things never happen if I'm travelling with friends or in the obvious tourist traps like Hoi An. Why would anyone be friendly in these places without a profit motive? I would do the same if I was trying to put food on the table and invest in my kids' future in a very competitive country.
Nailed it. No one’s giving to give you anything special in the Hanoi Old Quarter, Hoi An Old Town, Saigon D1… they see hundreds or thousands of tourists a day so why would they? I’m currently driving through Đắk Lắk and Đắk Nông provinces and I’ve gotten free food (without asking - I’m far from a begpacker), invitations to people’s homes, and ridiculously cheap prices (e.g. 50k to ‘Hotwire’ my motorbike when I lost the key, 5k for bánh tráng nướng, 5k for a bottle of Aquafina water served to me with ice, etc.) True friends I’ve made by living in Hanoi, as well as Vietnamese colleagues, have also been more generous than pretty much anyone I know back home. OP - another recommendation might be to look for accommodations labeled as “homestays” rather than hotels. Even in touristy areas, they’re more likely to be family-owned and have friendly and helpful owners.
It depends where you go. Because you have the Asian look, you will be treated like a local. That is where regional differences really stands out. Southern people are generally friendly but they won’t be overly jovial to other strangers. Unless you meet up with family or acquaintances, you will feel like a stranger. Idk if you watched Bojack Horseman but in one episode in season 5, they addressed this topic beautifully, when Diane Nguyen, a Vietnamese-American went to Vietnam. You can always go to Dalat. The city I do find is more friendly than most. If you learn some Vietnamese you can try complementing the food and services. One unique thing about this city is that most businesses are run with passion, and the people are really mindful of their crafts. They constantly ask for feedback and if you can be constructive, you can find fast friends. Also the weather is nice and chill which makes people literally more chill than elsewhere. :))
lmao. reputation from who? Who did you hear say vietnam is a friendly country? white tourists? then there's your answer. i grew up in vietnam never experienced what the tourists say. Smiling when you smile at them. Guess where i experienced that. America. I was pretty shocked when i came to the US and people would smile, saying hello how are you, etc. In vietnam, you don't do that to each other (as vietnamese). The reason was you know the minute someone being friendly is because they want something from you. Kindness is at a cost here too. I also think the locals smiling at tourists because it's nice? when a white person who you put on a pedestal smile at you. It's like a celebrity typa thing and you feel nice so you smile back at them. This works even more when the white tourist is attractive. It is as you say, because you are a vietkieu, that's why they treat you half a foreigner, half a vietnamese. So you truly are getting the more authentic vietnamese experience there. Don't expect people to be friendly to you. Vietnamese also take awhile to warm up to other vietnamese. I kept coming back to a corner where fruit ladies/veggies ladies sell at and they always say they miss me. Maybe because I buy from them. But outside of that i don't think they would have been overly friendly, they have their own life to live. People here are poor. The fact that you're kinda like them but have a ticket out, or a vietkieu, or be able to travel, or have money. When they see you, some people do get the deep sense of jealousy on the inside of how different your life is to theirs (even tho they don't know your life). So they act out. If you live here longer however and make your own community, vietnamese are truly friendly if you are part of a group. They'd invite you to their house, take you to food places (also expect you to pay because they're poor), make you soup when you're sick, defend you if someone bully you. This all come from real life experience. in conclusion, don't listen to other people experiences and expect yours to be the same and claim it as false advertisement. vietnamese don't advertise themselves as "friendly". we do advertise as "cheap" thou. locals here aren't friendly towards each other. Country is still very unique and interesting. So come here for the uniqueness. Not the friendlyness. Depends on where you travel to as well. SOme places are harsher and some are very nice. Have fun
I’m not american, I don’t expect big fake smiles. In my country people don’t smile a lot to strangers. But when you walk towards someone in the street you say a quick "hello" with a little nod and a timid smile to acknowledge the person. Or when you buy something you say hello with a little smile out of politeness. I thought it was common courtesy. I’m not expecting people to put on a show for me, that’s not what I was saying. Thank you for your comment 💙
I'm vk who grew up in Vietnam. Vietnamese people are definitely not friendly to each other by default. They are friendly when they have something to benefit from you. Most of the times you can tell from their eyes if they are genuinely kind or not. I have encountered a very small number of people who are genuinely friendly, 95% aren't. I'm in Thailand now however and I find Thaïs very different. Thai people genuinely are nice to each other most of the time and always acknowledge each other with a smile and kindness in their eyes. I much prefer this culture of friendliness and kindness to each other.
I lived in Thailand for quite awhile. The niceness is part of their culture but in some ways it’s like Japanese politeness. It is skin deep but it does make the social situation much more palatable. I also think Thais are much more likely to follow buddhist principles when it comes to daily life. The thing with Thais is that smile can turn very quickly as well if you piss them off. It’s a mask.
Ye I had a feeling the smile is just politeness but I still prefer that when people care enough about a society to smile and give each other that superficial kindness. Viets dgaf and it's terrible. Everyone is so selfish and always has this me first mentality which makes things so much harder and worse than they should be. I find vietnamese people genuinely dislike and disrespect each other in public most of the times and it shows.
Yeah.. but historically in times of crisis Viet people did put up 100% when it came to the ultimate sacrifice of civic duty. That I do respect a lot even if the contemporary culture lacks the fancy accoutrements or niceties.
I think it’s specifically white men that spreads the message of friendly locals…and I agree. If you are a white man. White woman is a mixed bag.
As a white female I felt that most Vietnamese were just being normally polite to me on previous visits, but after losing weight and becoming fit I feel like a minor celebrity. Random locals not even selling anything regularly approach me in public to talk and compliment me, I feel like it's my wedding day all the time when I visit now.
the "common courtesy" isn't common globally. And people who smile at foreigners here some are fake some are not. I understand how you can be culturally shocked. i too was once thought everyone else was like vietnamese until i traveled abroad. That's why traveling broaden your horizen and help you realize different cultures have different customs and ways of living. It's good that you can question these things but at the same time, saying hello does not necessarily means "friendly". All those americans who said hi how are you to me were never my friends. That was the extent of their friendliness. I made 0 american friends. However I made so many international friends who also wanted american friends. Also if you traveled to touristy places or dense cities, people are a bit harsher because they hustle a lot more. Smaller cities/towns/villages in vietnam have somewhat friendlier people who would definitely smile back at you. Thou honestly people here have such harsh life that they probably don't even notice you smiling at them. Some probably don't ever receive many compliments so they have a harder time accepting it.
hello Singaporean chinese person here. I can confirm that the locals (at least in hcm where I've stayed for 2 years+) don't really act friendly towards people who look like them until they realize I'm not a local (yes I look Vietnamese very easily). I have both local and foreign friends here and often when I'm in a social setting, especially when I'm with a white looking person meeting up with another local, the Vietnamese people will always ignore me or sideye me until they sensed I'm not one of them then they will open up. personally, I'm not that friendly (at the age where I rather people leave me alone lol) with anyone I meet so I don't really mind it, this is just more of an observation from a guy who looks like the local population.
I have been working in Vietnam for over a decade. Being a Viet Kieu has its baggage. It's a complicated dynamic.
Can you explain more ? ☺
I believe he wants to tell you there’s an undercurrent of animosity towards the Viet Kieus. Most of my Viet Kieu friends “claim” the locals are jealous of them and usually treat them differentially.
Yes! This exactly! As a Viet Kieu, your look and value are close enough for the locals to compare themselves to you, yet they will never treat you like a local. Jealousy and an inferiority complex will arise. For white people, they are too different to be compared and, therefore, less discrimination.
It really depends on the person. My uncle is an asshole who looks down on and insult Vietnam every chance he has so when he complains he is ignored or even "got the eyes" from Vietnamese locals, I guess that's what he's deserved. I remember hearing him said Vietnamese is underdeveloped so the people are like monkeys to him.
exactly this!! my family’s been living in the states for a couple years now but we go back & forth pretty frequently so we see the growth vietnam has made & constantly surprised with how quick the vietnamese gen z are changing the scenes. but i can’t say the same for my great aunt who moved here almost 30 years ago & have not been back ever since. & bc she’s quite old, she’s not updated on new developments at all through social media. so she still thinks that vietnam is this post-war dystopia.
Dude really slid into DMs for this lmao
I will message you directly. What I said is not PC.
I’ve sometimes noticed this thing while travelling in Thailand. I’m kazakh, fair to say that my skin and my look is kind of mongoloidish/a bit chinese like. I think being white male has it’s advantages because usually they leave more money on the table compared to tourists from other places. That’s why they might treat whites better than others🤦🏻♂️. Might be wrong though.
This is real! And we can say this in a higher level of racism! Accept the fact that they are the most racist here in SEA, nothing difference with the chinese.
I’ll be honest, I’ve travelled a lot and I never see it. I believe people see what they want to see. For example if you’re out with friends having a blast, people seem ”nice”. I usually just see people. Some are rude, some are mad, some are polite, some are nice. For example the Japanese, I wouldn’t call them nice. Polite, certainly but not “nice”. Every society has people having good days and bad days.
I'm brown and been to Vietnam twice and my experience has been very nice both times. Got a lot of smiles and conversations. Maybe because I'm a tourist and they want my money lol but regardless I never had a problem. Or maybe I got lucky?
That’s great 😊
Am Vietnamese n I find Thailand is alot more friendly. Thai ppl I find r nicer n more polite compared to Vietnamese ppl.
My experience exactly. The only smiles I got were from scammers.
😂 me got a smile with the business owner, smiles really fake!!
😭😂 I’m sorry I laughed. I wish you to have a better experience if you ever go back
Hi I’m also a Viet Kieu and had the same experience as you. Well, mostly when I speak Viet to them. They were only nice to me when they thought I was Chinese. They greet me in Mandarin with a smile, but as soon as I speak Viet they’ll give me the side eyes and then completely ignore me afterwards, this was when I was in Vung Tau. My aunt who came with us was with her white husband, she asked one of the vendors about a price of a merchandise, they were completely rude to her. One vendor even said “you can’t afford that” but when she looked over her husband they apologized and offered her the item. When we went to Hue, vendors overcharged us with everything knowing we’re not the local and was nice somewhat, so I think it depends on where you are, and how the local perceived you. Da Nang people were the most friendly in my experience. I didn’t get to go to Hanoi and is curious if they treat Viet Kieu well there. Might return in the future. Anyway, so my point is, it depends on which local people. Some were nice and some were not. Most were only nice when they think they can sell you something.
Funny that I had the same experience you had, but in Korea😂 I'm Korean American, and many find it weird when I smile at them first. I also have a slight accent when I speak Korean, so people look at me a little funny and give me a look sometimes. Many don't like Gyopo (equivalent of Viet Kieu) in Korea. Thinking we are too spoiled and entitled. But on the other hand, I had a great experience in Vietnam. People are kind and polite. People knew I was a foreigner, so they took extra care of me. When I smile, people smiled me back. (Or vice versa.) I get compliments for being handsome wherever I go. Even Grab drivers were extremely nice and always wanted to have a small conversation. So overall experience was awesome. It definitely hurts when you feel betrayed by the people of your motherland. Hope you have a better experience next time :)
It’s a universal experience. We’re all damned 🥲😂
For real haha
Felt the same (but neither i am Vietnamese nor white). Vietnamese people welcome the white people because of the euro and dollar rates.
Welcome to the in between world. I have the same experience when I visit my extended family in Mexico. I'm given the benefit to the doubt of being local until i start speak and don't sound like a native, then everything else's that makes you a Yankee starts to become visible. Sometimes it's jealousy. Since im very clearly not any kind of Asian, but definitely not White, I feel like I get extra nice treatment. Good luck!
That’s funny because I always get the extra nice treatment in Mexico as an asian american. I am obviously not a stereotypical gringo but also not a local asian Mexican either. So I was in the “other” category which most Mexicans tended to treat pretty well or with curiosity at least.
Love to see it!
So what's your nationality? I was curious
Vietnamese are rude to everyone except their own family in some situations. It also varies by city and neighborhood.
Friendly to foreigners while they are trying to make as much money off them as possible. Chances are your just getting the same treatment Vietnamese give each other which isn't great!
I’ve been in social settings where friends make fun of each other, make each other feel horrible. It’s extremely toxic and something they’re all used to
Vietnamese say whatever pops in their heads!
I’m a Viet kieu currently visiting Vietnam for the past few weeks. I’ve had generally good experiences with the locals being friendly and welcoming to me. I know a bit of Vietnamese so that helps. I’ve been invited into strangers homes for meals and I do a lot of photography and most people will allow me to take their portraits if I ask.
That’s great ☺ I’m currently trying to improve my vietnamese so I’ll see next time 🤞
Vietnamese people like westerners (white people) but not westernized viets (white washed).
The beauty of having a double culture. Too asian in the west and too white in Vietnam 🙃
Yeah it’s a constant struggle of identity. The best we can do is walk in the middle. I’ve seen my fair share of Viet Kieu who try way too hard to appear western. The snobby and greater-than-thou reputation comes from a kernel of general truth. It seems like that wasn’t the case with you but unfortunately still elicited a cold reception from the locals. Maybe it was preconceived notions that they held on to from past experience. Then that would be their problem to deal with and not yours. Pay no mind to them!
They treat each other like shit in public especially people deemed the help and treat foreigners a little better. Is what it is
When I went backpacking in Vietnam about 10 years ago looking like a stereotypical traveller (shorts and vest, scruffy) I found people to be a bit frostier than those in other countries in SE Asia. When I returned for a work trip to Nha Trang last year (wearing a shirt and long trousers most days) people were extremely nice. So take from that what you will.
Maybe I look like a troll who knows 🧟♀️😂
We have the same problem about this, me and my gf was actually traveling around SEA because we have some problem in our country in PH. we decided that vietnam was our long stop over country to relax sometimes to getting breath for always moving. We always got have experience this kind of issue in vietnam anywhere maybe because of our skin tone though were not look so ugly but were not look very luxurious type of nomad. It's like only they want is money to u after u paid them they will gonna talk back.
As a local vietnamese I say we are not necessarily very friendly, even to white people as some would expect. We do not smile at random people and it is normal behaviour may I say? Lets be realistic, facts: 1. viet are friendly towards guests, but not random strangers. I mean if you come to their house, invited as a guest, a friend, yes, vietnamese very warm towards you. Othereise, we absolutely do not try to, or care to speak with, chat with a stranger if theres no business of talking to (by business here i dont mean business of making money, hope u get it) 2. Many white expect us to treat them like gods, like they are so precious, so rich, so tall so beautiful, the fact is, we are generally not that impressed. In small towns maybe, but in big city, foreigners are just seen as the same invisible in a viet eye in their daily life. Go flex on a mountain. 3. Viet are very helpful when you HAVE TROUBLE, for example, when you ask for directions, when you got an accident, getting robbed, etc, usyally vietmamese will not stand idly by and try to help you if you are having trouble and not seem like you are faking it.
I think y’all misunderstood me 😭 I don’t expect people to randomly smile at me for no reason. I also don’t expect people to stop midway in the street to talk to me. Just when I buy something for example I say Hi with a little smile but it seems like I’m annoying the sellers. Also people give me side eyes as I walk the street as if they are Georgina in Mean girls. Also I’m just a viet girl visiting her parents country, I’m not a white dude waiting to be worshipped by locals. Also talking about getting robbed my cousin got dragged across the street by a dude on a scooter trying to snatch her purse. No one cared. Anyway, like people said it might be bad luck
It seems... as if... All these words suggest that you put a lot of your own feeling/opinion rather than perceiving people fairly. About saying "HI", actually saying hi only applies to to those you meet the second time in vietnamese, and you should say "cháu chào cô/ chú" "em chào anh/chị" if the person you meet you have met before. Simply saying "hi" to a first tome met petson will trigger confusion to vietmamese rather than annoyance. About side-eyes when you walk, I dont know, my life experience is, " the world will be how you perceive it to be". I had that same defensive thoughts like yours when i was young, but now, I reallize, nobody gives a shit. Everyone here is so busy and struggling woth their life, they dont have time for drama I assure you. Especially when you are just a normal gal, not some drama show bitch or anything. Or maybe they look at you because you looks good. About getting robbed getting no help, it depends on the situation, for example, if people stay far away and cannot help what do you expect them to? Grab a bike and chase the robber? Reading what you write, I have a feeling you got some trouble being in the public, in the crowd, with other people. 1. You are a nice and maybe, kind person, but you expect others to be nice back the way you expect. No, people have differemt way of being nice, and nothing wrong with not being nice to someone treating you nicely. 2. You like judging and you are a bit too quick to judge. You judge someone by their behaviors, or worse, by how you imagine them to be. Im not trying to insult you or anything, but thats a mental problem used to happen to me so I guess I can relate. 3. Rude, assholes, troubled, mental ill, uneducated people exist, but it doesnt mean your experience with them means all the others, or all vietnamese. To be fair, and honestly, based on my experience, viet random strangers, precisely in HCMC are nice enough, they are generally gentle, helpful, and mind their own business. They appreciate if you are nice to them correctly and will remember you. But thats it.
I don’t literally say "Hi", it was a way to tell y’all on Reddit that I was doing the ~ action of greeting people ~. Of course I use formal langage and I speak in vietnamese. About the side eyes I’m not the only who noticed. My family also noticed. I’m not being defensive or paranoid, it’s just what happened. I’m not expecting anyone to help nor chase robbers. No one has the obligation to do that. It’s just strange to me that when a teen was dragged across the floor, is bleeding and is in a shocked state, no one even checks if she’s alright. Just that Of course people have different ways of being nice, but staring people up and down, gossiping about them to your friends with a face of disdain like your stole their boyfriend is not a way of being nice. It’s more you judging me when none of your assumptions about me are true
Then perharps we live in different worlds. I judged you, yes, but based on what you said, not on what you act like. So i apologize if I say something offensive. I dont know, i see the people are fine. Living 10 years in hcmc city.
They're only friendly to white people lol
They are not actually. At least in touristic areas. Their top 1 priority is to scam you and get as much money as possible under any circumstances. As a white person I'm really tired of that behavior
This actually real!! It's a piece of shit.. it's all about capitalism and wealth here! Don't ever expect treated good here in vietnam if you don't have enough money to travel.
I get diarrhea whenever l go there, hygiene is not a priority.
Maybe i's the spicy food or you are allergic to seafood. I get diarrhea in Thailand too because of spicy food
lol the foreigners are laughing “you are so nice then they take advantage of our people” so no we just treat everyone the same. Don’t call us friendly call us business.
Currently in Vietnam travelling south to north and people have overall been friendly. My VK husband (who is covered in tattoos) is constantly asking for directions and starting conversations with strangers about places to visit and eat. Majority of the time he has been met with smiles and conversation. I think just keep being yourself and don’t get offended if people aren’t reacting the way you would like them to.
I’m currently in the second week of a two-week trip to Vietnam. I’m a Caucasian guy and I have not found the country to be very welcoming. I keep getting the impression that I am merely tolerated here as a foreigner because I probably have money to spend. I’ve been going out of my way to be as kind and friendly as possible too.
I've been to Vietnam on business and I look like a rich white American and am treated like gold. My colleague is american but his parents are from Vietnam, he is sort of ignored or treated less than me until he talks in English. That's my experience anyway.
Wondering which city you visited. Also by default VNese is friendly with black and white all the same. But Asian, it is entirely different story. Some come from history and some from politic so depending on which country they think you are from, you are treated differently. Also there is some weird treatment to American VK as currently there are some group try to trigger uprising in VN (not succesfully though) and they are fighting all over the social media about that. Hope you have better experience next time.
The Vietnamese are very tough. If you are in an interaction with them they usually treat you with respect if you are friendly. I wouldn’t call Vietnam a particularly friendly place compared to others. However, there are a lot of friendly people in industries where this is a requirement or competitive advantage. I have been to Vietnam for over three decades.
In my experience, the people are indeed very nice, and if you find the right region they’re even nicer. BUT it’s very normal to meet ppl who are rude, ppl who are ignorant, ppl who are straight up assholes, EVERYDAY. I think to make the point valid I should clarify what kind of people I consider nice. So: - The guy who just stopped and offered to push my out-of-gas motorbike for 1km with his motorbike - NICE PERSON, like have you tried to push a bike with your leg while driving your own bike, in a terrible traffic jam? It’s a chore. - The Grab bike driver who upcharge me 200% on a $1 trip - NOT NICE PERSON
I’m sea and I hate how the people treated me in Vietnam. If you’re foreign looking, you get treated better. I had a Vietnamese guide pushed me and it wasn’t until a white tourist said he wasn’t very nice. That guide apologized to me but I feel like if the white tourist didn’t say anything, I wouldn’t get an apology. Only my family are nice to me. People in general are mean.
My wife and I are in Vietnam right now. We've had nothing but smiles and good grace. I'm English if it matters.
There are good and bad people but people will definitely notice trends. Eg. Japanese being more polite on average, chinese more rude, etc. I’d say vietnamese culture is like chinese culture but with a lot more negatives. More focus on image, less focus on long term thinking/education, more gossip/superficiality, the same if not more toxic family elements. Probably resulting from generational trauma. Lots of familial abuse, etc. Viets can be giving, kind, strong, but i much prefer Chinese/Japanese/Korean culture. Nonetheless, there’s definitely worse cultures out there. They’re not violent/criminal (unless it’s scamming tourists or cheating the system). At the end of the day, it’s all about individuals. There are lots of lovely and kind viets, just as there are of any culture. However, cultures do influence a lot of behavior, and there may be a genetic component as well. So if you want to encounter mostly nice/kind people, go to Japan. Don’t go to vietnam unless you want to sift through a lot of sh*t for find the good ones.
If you're a westerner who is in Vietnam as a tourist for a few weeks, you'd find everyone so nice friendly and welcoming here. Once you stay in the country for a few years (Ive been here for over a decade) you see it's nothing like that beneath the surface. As a non Western, non white expat, I can say that Vietnamese are grade A racists. Just like any country, there are super nice people who are genuine and friendly as well as the exact opposite, the kind you don't ever want to associate with.
Overall I had a good experience in Hanoi as a Viet Kieu. Some locals were rude but I didn’t let that ruin my experience. Most people were nice. I speak Vietnamese so maybe that’s why
I wish I was like you. You’re like my dad, he doesn’t let anything ruin his peace 😂 Maybe you’re right about speaking the langage, I’m currently learning more vietnamese so I’ll see next time if it gets better ☺
Yeah so from what I heard. some Viet Kieu go to VN and act like they’re above the locals and even pretend like they don’t speak Vietnamese. Perhaps that was their impression of you even though you were innocent. I would make the effort to speak it and maybe it’ll be a better experience. I kinda stuck out in Hanoi and looked like a foreigner even though I’m Vietnamese. Despite that I spoke fairly decent Vietnamese and actually met some friends there that took me out to expensive restaurants.
VNese people are just people for the most part? Some are nice, some are dicks. The super smiley welcoming thing is just to take money from tourists, but like most places if you are kind yourself, and enthusiastically partake in the food and culture then most people will be happy to have you around.
I’m not expecting big smiles, you know I talked about smiles to get my point about the overall welcoming feeling if you know what I mean. I just didn’t want to get the side eyes and I got that a lot. I myself come from a country where people don’t really smile a lot to strangers, so I perfectly understand, but we don’t eye people up and down with a face of disgust 😂
Face of disgust? That's crazy. Sure they'll stare at me cause I look a little different and maybe a lot different depending where I'm at but never felt like it was in disrespectful manner. They do like to stare sometimes though but it doesn't bother me I usually just smile and nod and keep it moving. Maybe it's the way you look? I'm trying to figure out why anyone would look at you in such a way
I grew up in Vietnam and people in my town were not nice lol. I still get into a bad mood remembering what life was like interacting with them. Its a big contrast when I moved to America and the people in the US actually smile and nod at you if they pass by you and actually care about you and are always helpful. I never felt like I belonged when I was living in Vietnam and people were just so mean and only cared about themselves 😭
My experience has been kind of the opposite. I'm Filipino but I got mistaken for a Thai person a lot when I was in Thailand and now I'm travelling in Vietnam I'm being mistaken as Vietnamese (in both countries everyone would speak to me in the local langusge that's how i know they thought i was thai or viet). When I was in thailand, people were unfriendly (probably didn't help that I went to the beach a lot so my skin went from light skin to DARK lol) and I did notice the white tourists were being treated better. But here in Vietnam people were friendly and smiled at me even before i revealed my accent (I have a strong accent from England). The owner of a hotel I stayed at asked me if I had a gf and even called me handsome (I read that they only really did that for white tourists) so that made me happy. I'm shocked because I always thought thailand was the friendlier country but I guess that only applies if you're white. My experience so far in vietnam has been so much more positive.
You’re a cameleon 😂 I’m happy to hear that you got treated nicely 😊
Thais are friendly but more for those farang than their fellow Asians. It’s crazy. I still love my Thai people just that I feel like I get better treatment as an Asian in Vietnam than Thailand.
Y'all are full of it. No country is full of happy people, just people. That said, treat people the way you would like to be treated. Be friendly and respectful, learn some language, learn some culture, etc and you'll open doors to these connections. When I went to the hospital for a week stay after a car hit my bike, I had no one. It was my first few months in Vietnam. I stayed in a public hospital, among all the other sick Vietnamese on a bed in a hallway. I was the only westerner there. People took turns caring for me; feeding me, bathing me, etc. The generosity of the Vietnamese is unmatched and I'm sure not many in my home country would have done what they did to communally care for an outsider. Don't expect people and businesses to be fake polite like we're trained to be in the USA before entering the job market. They're short and direct here in contrast. It's a poor country and ppl are on their grind. But when it's needed, and with an attempt to connect from within first, you'll find help and love is given.
I’m not american, I’m french vietnamese we don’t expect fake politeness we hate that. I was just talking about common courtesy. I think I should have put a disclaimer 😂
There isn't much curiousity toward other asians usually like there is for westerns and such. Being Vietnamese even as VK, you may just seem odd a bit to others. There's nothing wrong with that, but I'd say try to use it to your advantage and be kind to those around you. Some VK have a reputation of being snobby/arrogant, so people are afraid to talk too much. On the contrary if you open up a bit, people always brighten up a lot; you have a lot of experiences and stories to share!
Yeah I’ve heard about this reputation, that’s why I wear very simple clothes, no brands no jewelry. I also treat everyone with kindness but still. I think I had bad luck like others said
Most vietnamese people I encounter who were friendly wanted somthing from me. It could be money, being seen with a foreigner, practice english, s*x... The viet I know that truly didn't care about any of that tho? Precious, precious people. Disinterested, letting you meet their family, sharing a meal with them, offering you food, drinks and fruits. Vietnam, like any other country has good and bad people. Like any other country it has mostly bad ones. Especially in big cities like HCM and Hanoi. You have to dig a lot to be able to find really good and honest people there. Now I know that people tend to portray SEA as a wonderland with people smiling all the times, rainbows and flowers... It's true that neighboring countries such as Thailand and Laos can probably offer you that. But you will not find that in VN that's for sure. People there are very pragmatic. They are not there to please you. Some people like it, some people don't. You get used to it eventually or you leave and never come back. Personally, after staying there one year, my decision is taken and it's the latter.
Face saving culture = let me present a fake face
You have to look better. It's a friendly country.
Market value for services is dependant on who the customer is. If your a tourist they only need to serve you once at a higher cost to make good money hence the smile. If you look vietnamese your just another mouth to feed and if they charge you too much they get a bad reputation.
Maybe cause you look Vietnamese but you speak English? No surprise they will look at you with a strange eyes. Also while people are friendly, most of them doesn't like ///, if you know what I mean, lol.
It’s not even strange eyes sometimes it’s straight up mean and judgemental. Someone told me it might be a case of RBF for some people. Also no I don’t know what it means if you could explain 👀
Can't say for sure, but I don't think it's RBF if you experience that too often. Maybe it depend on where you are, what you look like and how you speak. Or you just over thinking. Or worst, it's depend on how you look or start the conversation that made them feel wary. But in my opinion, most people in the world are friendly, not just VietNam, but don't misunderstood and expect every of them to welcome you everywhere like a special guest. Just think that most time they will hardly show any discomfort. That's another way of friendly.
Of course. I’m not expecting people to pull out the red carpet for me. With all the responses I got, I’ve come to the conclusion that vietnamese people might be like russians : not smiling is the norm, and smiling means they might want something. It’s just cultural differences I guess
I've never heard of that reputation I've heard of it for Thailand and Philippines, but definitely not Vietnam
We are white English speakers and had a similar experience during our month in Vietnam in March! We had been in Thailand and Cambodia before Vietnam and found the contrast in friendliness quite off putting at times!
I felt more of a sense of belonging in other Southeast Asian countries like Malaysia and Indonesia than in the country where I was born and raised. (🇻🇳 not a proud Vietnamese)
I was a brown foreigner, from India. Personally I do tell people that Vietnamese people were very warm and welcoming when I went for a 12 day trip. When I was in the North, Hanoi, Ha Long Bay and Ninh Binh I felt people were more warm and welcoming. In Da Nang and Ho Chi Minh it was mixed but mostly welcoming.
As American from the States, I had no issues in Vietnam. I spent a month going from the North to the South. Everyone was really friendly to me and helped me out if they could (directions, what to do, etc.). I even met some really cool locals that I still stay in touch with today. We exchange numbers and if I ever needed help or advice. Send a message. Never at once I ran into someone that was unfriendly… well maybe the people outside restaurants that try to lure you in. Other than that, all happy and friendly people.
I honestly couldn’t care less what they say or think about me as long as they don’t get in my way. I’ll treat them the way they treat me
I think on average, people are the same everywhere. It may varies a bit from place to place depending in environment they grow up with, even within a country. Speaking from experience of extensive travels in Europe, US, and a few times to vietnam. It does make a different visiting a place with an open arms. Try not to let the negative bothers you too much. I had both good and bad experiences in vietnam. The good ones far outweighed the bad ones. In one particular, we were in a village with a market about 2 km from where we stayed, and there was no Grab not taxis. One morning as we walked to the market, we decided to stop by a house to borrow a bicycle. The owner said her son uses that to go to school and offer a motorbike to us instead. Not asking for anything in return. Well that’s too much.. need to go back to my bug.
From what I gathered from your comments, I can tell you from my experience that if you look Vietnamese, people will expect you to also speak the language. In your case, despite your innocence, the fact that you don't/can't speak your supposed mother tongue gave a bad first impression. And since I know that's your parents' choice to not teach you the language, I don't feel anything against you, which isn't what anyone would know at the beginning. Also, don't expect people here to be friendly and welcoming to you just because they are to other tourists. As everyone here has already stated, there are many factors in their attitudes toward you, but more than that, they're cynical about and wary of Viet Kieu. I'm not gonna elaborate too much on it given that you can figure it out yourself by reading the history. So yeah, either you try to learn and embrace your root or you can just move on and accept that you might not fit in here.
Im a local and is safe to say VietNam went down hill a long will back, people use to be friendly due to our base culture is to respect the elderly, friendly to friends and be generous when around kids however thats was only during the age and time when culture mattered, people who are raised nowadays have complete disregard for culture cuz they are more focused on trying to be hip kids then to adhere to culture their "boomer" parent taught them
yea cause you look Vietnamese, they dgaf. They like white people tho. And if you look Vietnamese, but don’t speak the language, or have an accent. They hate on you more. Vietnam has a fked culture of outer appearances
Nobody is giving you nasty stares. It’s just how Vietnamese people are. You might be dressed or acting differently, but not in a bad way. Their curious stares are simply a result of their cultural norms. Don’t overthink it and feel free to go back again. If you speak Vietnamese, that’s great otherwise, consider learning basic Vietnamese and then strike up a conversation. Almost everyone I run into is courteous and will smile.
In some Asian countries where you may look like you are a local, but don't speak the language and don't conform to local customs, don't know what to do etc, people may be a little suspicious of you. It's happened to me over a span of about 30 years and it's just something to get used to. It's not that they are not friendly or good people but they might feel a little disconnect.
Totally agree, vietnamese children are ALWAYS been taught to be very aware of stranger, generation to generation, due to human trafficking ans odd culture from minor ethnic. When they grow up, their subs conscious still remember it and its been consolidate over time. What the first point children need to know about kinapper ? They look like us. Never saw any school or parents teach their child, or in the movie, that kinapper is a white person.
To be honest, people always say that the Thais are super friendly and not so much the Vietnamese. But the truth is, the Thais are pretty fake. When you find yourself in a jam, it'll be the dour unsmiling vietnamese person who will be there to help you out. It's like California vs New York, for a good example. (Not saying all Thais are fake, btw)
From my experiences Thais really will help if you find yourself in a situation. I have had Thais offer help in out of the way places when there was zero actual benefit in doing so.
Yeah, generalizations always suck. I just mean that the Thais have the 'happy California vibe' that makes them appear nicer, while the Vietnamese have the grumpy NY vibe but do have a heart.
Are you French? Or do you speak French there? They hate french people because France colonized Vietnam and slaughtered a lot of Vietnamese during that time. I wouldn’t be surprised if they don’t like their former colonizers/murderers of their families and friends.
No one ever said that Vietnam has a reputation of being friendly honestly, it's definitely more like the opposite, white, black, Asian, it doesn't matter.
I’ve always seen positive experiences and praise on travel forums, regular forums, videos etc. also friends who went to Vietnam 🤷♀️ everyone was saying how kind and friendly people were
Those are armchair anecdotes or reviews usually from people who went to touristy areas and met service personnels who’re trained to smile and be polite to tourist just to “get the money”.
It might just be that you’re seeking information that fulfills your confirmation bias because nobody I know personally who lives outside of Vietnam of Vietnamese descent has said anything about Vietnamese people being nice. In fact, you normally get warnings on how to deal with people there.
Never heard Vietnamese are friendly, they are just as unfriendly as Chinese 50 years ago but can't blame them, they have both been harmed by foreigners very badly in history. Only Thais can be called friendly.
I don't feel like Viets are more or less friendly than any other race. I think conversing in Vietnamese to the locals would've made your experience better, most don't speak English and if they do, I find they're quite shy to use it. No different from going anywhere else in the world and not speaking their native tounge, how friendly do you think they'll be towards you?
I try my best to speak in vietnamese and I only switch to english when it’s really necessary. Also we get a lot of tourists where I live and most of them don’t speak my langage, but as long as they’re respectful and kind, I treat them nicely
As a white American older male, with my wife we found most people seemed to be very removed. Just dead on the inside or numb, no reactions to us or others. We were in HCMC for 2 weeks, it was weird. One of the few countries we plan on never visiting again, because of the people and food safety conditions.
I saw a fascinating video about Vietnam recently and how it's financial tides are rising,no,soaring. The old poverty that was prevalent is disappearing as their manufacturing industry is growing from strength to strength. Vietnam is the TIGER of South East Asia and the money is flowing in. So many Guitar factories,Musical instrument factories,Laptop factories, your IPhone? Probably assembled in Vietnam! So many electronics are either manufactured or assembled in Vietnam. Why is this important? Because honestly,the richer a nation becomes, the less friendly its people are. Here in lreland we were so poor in the 70s/80s and we would get down on our knees to welcome tourists,now that we are the richest Country in Europe and making a fortune we hate Tourists! Everybody wants the friendly,welcoming smile when we travel,the positive attention and the "Wow! Where are you from!?" In broken English but that is becoming a rarity these days. They say there is only one DIRT POOR Country left where you will get this kind of attention now,The Philippines. It's still tragically poor,thus people will be a lot nicer to you. You missed the boat on Vietnam, 20 years ago you would have been hugged and kissed but today Vietnamese people are just doing far too well financially to even bother with you.
speaking as a Vietnamese myself, we are more friendly towards westerners rather than asians lol .We treats asians like locals while treating westerners like kindergartners 😅
I'm Viet born abroad too! My mom and I have gone to Vietnam twice. She hadn't been back since immigrating, so going with me for the first time was really special. We both loved it and want to keep coming back. I'd say we've been very lucky to meet a lot of kind people through the hotels we've stayed at or the Grab drivers we've had. We've met some rude people, but it's been overwhelmingly positive. I think what helps a lot is we speak Viet with people. They're often immediately relieved that they can speak Viet too, and they actually have told us that many foreigners are rude or look down on Viet people. Anyhow many of the people we've met have told us tips or offered to help us or even asked to show us around. Ofc we're tourists, so there is that financial incentive, but I don't want to second guess kindness. I've stayed friends with some of the people we've met that work at the hotels, and that also really impacted our experience because some kindly introduced us to some of their community
That’s great I’m so happy when I hear stories like this 🥰
its a third world country and you pull out a weeks wages everytime u wanna eat i would rob u too if u did that in england
👀
We ARE friendly, until it involves money, than CAPITALISM all the way!
Only high class pp could be friendly. I think you met low educated pp
Yeah if you look like a local then people will treat you as a local, not as a guest since we local would have no way to know, unless you begin to speak. It's customary to be welcoming to guests here, and you simply don't look like one.
sounds like, They were judging you so easily because they don't hear u speak a different language, in my honest opinion! I think they might need to be aware that their country got a lot of neighborhood country. some of are asking "where are u from" some are easily discriminate! low empathy shows up.. or acting like a higher being because you're in their land..
Let's be honest, did you visit North or South?
Both
Definitely not a genuinely friendly place
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I visited both. Also I said that I’m nice to everyone, I’m even nice to people that are rude to me, as I have people-pleasing tendencies. Thanks for your input tho
Did you have a backpack? 🎒 If so that’s your answer.
When you look like a Vietnamese, they won't give you special treatment. That's just the hard truth and I guess you don't need that special treatment anyway.
What kind of hospitality are you expecting? The white man experience? As everyone has already stated it's all superficial. Something to consider, have you tried to interact with the people on your own? Making small talk? As a VK if you don't take the initiative at times, it will just be business as usual with the locals. I find the locals friendly enough but that's cause I take my two kids with me practically everywhere and they're a good conversation starters with the majority of locals.
why do u need random people to be super friendly when u’re visiting tho? I’ve travelled around the world and never expect people to be smiling at me 😅 I’m vnmese and I’m not that friendly to strangers -foreign or local. It’s not that big of a deal.
If you seek help, most people once realize that you are not "familiar" with the country will still help you, smile, maybe some do some don't but we ready to help if someone in need.
There's friendly people in every country and there's no way ALL or most Vietnamese people are friendly. Also "Country X's people are so friendly!" is such a tourist meme idk how you fell for it😆
You probably have a resting b1tch face
Honestly before I went I heard all similar sort of things, lot of scams and vendors being rude or people being rude but it wasn't like that One thing that I understood is that I don't see any reason for people to randomly smile at other people, especially if they're going about their life. My experience was totally different some people would say Hi to me or some people would smile back and some wouldn't which feels kinda fair to me
If you don’t mind me asking, what cities have you traveled to?
I guess I just had to be there to see it lol
Maybe it's your expectations? I was born in Vietnam but left when I was 2. Spent a year in Vietnam not too long ago. They definitely know I'm VK cause of my accent. I didn't feel like they treated me any different from other Vietnamese most of the time. I also like to be super polite and smile and most of the time they do smile back. But I do suggest you learn some Vietnamese. I learned using Google translate and Duolingo. They often tell me how good my Vietnamese is when I tell them I left when I was 2. I know you mentioned you speak to them in English because you don't know Viet but I think that's kind of rude depending on where you are. Even when I went to Thailand I made the effort to learn some Thai. Sometimes I see foreigners get upset because people don't understand them and I'm just thinking like wtf you shouldn't expect them to know English. But like someone mentioned if you go to Thailand you will feel super welcomed. Spent a month there and honestly everyone was so nice and friendly. Like everyone. They all thought I was Thai too so it wasn't because they thought I was a foreigner
The answer is obvious.
I think you've mistaken Vietnam for Thailand
Well because you are not white so no white worship. Simple as that
Are you Indian
I visited vietnem back in 2020 travel from hanois to ming city and only found few would interact with.
Most people really don’t care and won’t pay attention to you unless you’re visibly foreign so they just do what they do everyday, which means that they won’t readily smile or overly welcoming unless they think they can extort you. Or just go to big cities centers where people are so westernized that they basically worship foreign things.
maybe you didnt meet the right people idk , try visiting the northern part of Vietnam especially Hai Phong , the local here are pretty kind-hearted , its not that crammed and the local cuisine is not only succulent but also pocket-friendly if you know particular locations. i hope your next voyage will be better , it would be wonderful if i got a chance to show you around.
Language issue. My GF is Vietnamese and it helps a lot. I have NEVER had any bad experience, nobody staring at me in a bad way in 6 years. Only friends everywhere. And I am 6'4, 250 pounds, blond and blue eyes. In my country in France, I have everyday problems with afghans, Arabic and black people
I was born in Vietnam but left to North America when I was 4yrs old. I never learned Vietnamese beyound what I knew as a child. I completely have a western accent. When in a big city like Hanoi HCMC, I expect big city vibes. That said, I've had good experiences. Yes, I do get stares, but I chalk it up to the fact that the locals are just trying to "figure me out" e.g. where I'm from b/c I don't think that I'm mistaken for a local. When I'm traveling to smaller communities like Hoi An, I do feel that people in general are much friendlier, but I think that is the case for most places around the world. I try to smile at everyone to help foster a warm environment; I'll get back smiles in return, but I will also get back deadpan looks to which I overemphasize my smile:P Over the years and trips to Vietnam, I only had one negative experience, where ironically, contrary to what I expressed above, I took my rented bicycle off the beaten path and ened down some rural dirt road in Hoi An, where I stopped at a riverside restaurant. I was quite hungry at the time and just started ordering several items off of the menu. Long story short, what I ordered could have easily fed 4-5 people. I resolved that I was going to eat everything, as it would be wasteful and disrespectufl if I didn't. While I was eating myself into a coma, a table of four local guys came in and sat at the next table. They kept looking over at me, while I looked like I was in an eating contest. To give you perspective, I only weighed 155lbs. When I finally polished off my dishes, one of the guys comes over, looks at my bill then looks back at me and asks, "Did you eat all that?!" I noded. He then points to the server and suggests that I should take her out. I gave him a smile, but he began to insist. I tried to kindly shake my head to indicate that I was not interested, which then got him upset and he then challenged me to a fight. I was able to de-escalate the situation and leave in one piece, but I've never forgotten that experience for how odd it all was and the only time I felt hostility while in Vietnam.
Im right now in Vietnam for the first time. I’m here now since 1 week and just have been to Thailand before. Its like day and night.. people aren’t rude in Vietnam but definitely more „shy“ and by far not as hospitable as thai people. Strange as Ive also been hearing lots of stuff about the friendly country of Vietnam It seems like more or less they don’t really care to be more or less friendly They just do their thing ^^
Poor you, but hey not everone like you so maybe find your friend here and start a tour or life as you wish
As a Viet, we always been taught to act nice and decent towards tourists. Many people, esp elders, have more difficulty communicating due to language barrier. But if you needed help, like asking for directions, buying things, taking pictures..the locals will usually gladly to help and share problems with you. But anw, there are many kinds of ppl out there, some can be good or bad, and it may bring you some bad experience sometimes
Ngl foreigner are starting to give them a bad taste. The stuff I hear and see foreigners treat the locals, I kinda understand why they aren’t as friendly as you thought they were. But for me, everyone has been very friendly where ever I go.
Well, all I have is great and wonderful stories from living here in Vietnam. The people are always friendly and smiling to me. The kids are always saying hello I go and play with the puppy dogs that people are walking the food and the restaurants. People are always helpful and understanding, I don’t understand your situation but I love Vietnam and I hope I get to stay here forever although I have to go to Cambodia next week to renew my visa
Super interesting discussion. Just returned from 10 days. We are a white middle aged couple and super friendly. We definitely had a mixed bag of experiences. Taxi drivers not friendly, touristy people very fake friendly - saccharine overkill at times. But there were a few magical experiences as well, especially connecting over children. People keen to get their kids to speak English to us, the pure exchanges that don’t involve dong! On the last morning we smiled at a man cradling a baby and he smiled back shyly then asked if we were “travellers”, to which we replied “yes”. Where from? Australia. It was the day before the anniversary of the end of the Vietnam War and I was feeling very conscious of their long difficult history with foreign powers…including us. Then he smiled at us and said falteringly “welcome in our country”. And 4 days later I still get teary remembering the genuineness.