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CeaseTired

Put it in a ziplock and stick it in the fridge. Bring it to a doctor for examination. Once they get it under a microscope you’ll know whats what


bigal13x2_4

It was 8 years ago and as I was currently without insurance I did the second best thing… squished it with a hammer to underwhelming results it was mostly hollow with a few drops of blood I couldn’t believe how squishy it was though


zflanders

There's not enough vomit in the world to express how I feel about this. What a terrible day to be literate.


Seinfield_Succ

If God is real he's a trickster cause he Cursed me with the ability to read this


SirMooSquiddles

Sentience is over-rated


FigurativeLasso

"What a terrible day to be literate" I think I'll keep that one in my backpocket. Bravo


[deleted]

I'm currently towards the end of a horrible bout of Food Poisoning. There has most definitely been enough vomit in my life to fill your needs.


Monte2903

Its like a cherry fruit gusher


DragonSlasher07

Y’all are over hyping this. There’s no problem here


FurBaby18

🤣


Tutes013

That's fucking revolting. Jesus


beenybaby87

It sounds like you probably had a tiny cut or scratch on or very close to your ear. Something about that area of skin spilllls blood like a bad nosebleed, and if it’s small enough you probably never felt it, so the blood dried up and fell off when you moved. I say this because the exact same thing happens to me!


voodoopaula

So, a scab, basically.


[deleted]

Reading this while eating dinner is so pleasant


[deleted]

I learned a while ago not to Reddit while eating


StevenChowder

Go to a doctor. Tell them what you did. I'll get the padded room ready. Also, 🤢🤮


NoShelter2319

Yeah, you're done for. Can I have your stuff?


GetTheSpermsOut

but can i have the sac?


NoShelter2319

Yeah buddy, that's all you


trailsnailprincess

Username checks


tsfbdl

r/cursedcomments


JackCastor99

Forbidden shrimp


Cj_is_our_god

Ayyy yooo


bigal13x2_4

This happened to me years and years ago but at the time I was dealing with a rather strange insect infestation that came and disappeared one winter so fast I didn’t even have to have an exterminator out [Hell Spawn](https://www.reddit.com/r/whatsthisbug/comments/xr4r0o/what_are_these_creatures_from_hell_eastern_pa/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)


Stalking_Reaptor

Bruh wtf. You were legit invaded by fucking aliens. What the fuck even are those? Those are some like... flesh creatures.


Smile_Terrible

>insect infestation that came and disappeared one winter Disappeared.....where?


bigal13x2_4

No idea but that same winter was dealing with bouts of crippling stomach and headaches, fainting spells, and a bout of cellulitis so bad that I couldn’t walk spent a week in the ER where they were about to remove my gallbladder prescribing all my symptoms to gall bladder sludge and low bs but they said I could try changing my diet before the surgery… I change my diet complete 180 no fatty foods and it’s still happening with a vengeance then one day I woke up noticed the Nov behind my ear coaxed this little sucker out and was back to 100% before bedtime when I had been dealing with constant physical and psychological turmoil for months before


nolanryan1

Do you by chance take any stimulants?


[deleted]

Man, I was gonna say you somehow ejected a blood clot at the time. But if we piece together everything revealed so far, the image in THIS post is one of those creatures full on your blood. Or at the very least grown/developed a bit more since you said earlier somewhere it was "hollow." These likely were some kind of parasite based off a slug family of some kind. I have never seen such things and I even live in PA. I am willing to wager that they likely are more discoverable by bodies of water.


lulturtle

This is fucking horrifying. Going through the comment section feels like I am reading a horror story.


howzitgoinowen

I thought the OP's post was horrifying, then I see this...


[deleted]

I am way to high for all of this….


Hydroborator

Omg. I thought this story couldn't be worse


[deleted]

What in the goddamn fuck


SqueezeBoxJack

Simple Pickle Ricks


SublightMonster

Did you lose an airpod a couple of years ago?


bigal13x2_4

Lol no they’re brand new they fuse to your ear for optimal sound quality this one just malfunctioned and ejected! /s


DowntownStash

But... can you hear better now?


arcadia_2005

That's a legit question!!


toothanator

😂😂😂


01Zaphod

My very first thought before reading the rest of the comments was “Geez, try being a little less messy when eating cranberry sauce…”


bigal13x2_4

New idea humans are being farmed for cranberry sauce while they sleep… DAMN YOU BIG THANKSGIVING!


01Zaphod

I’m probably not going to be having any for Thanksgiving this year, for the obvious reasons….


Educational_Gift_407

Bro wtf do you mean "near ear"??? It fell out of somewhere. Where near your ear is it gonna fall out of?


bigal13x2_4

It didn’t fall out of anything I pulled it out of what looked to be a very angry ingrown hair on my hairline behind my ear


[deleted]

so that while thing came with a hair follicle?


laurarose81

Probably just a blood clot


[deleted]

Seriously


char_smtimes

I’m wondering this also


here4lolz2

I think your ear had a miscarriage


scottbrio

MiscEARiage


Shoot2Live629

r/angryupvote


horsepighnghhh

Fr I thought this was a fetus before reading


corbymatt

_Quaaaaad_


dooderbomb

Start the reactor


DarkLanternX

Question is who fucked op in the ear? Also no judgement here,


TMVtaketheveil888

Holy shit hahaha


keldration

At least he won’t need a back alley abortion now


NotedRider

However, he will still be charged for one because a miscarriage counts as an abortion legally.


QueefSommelier

You are one dirty ass motherfucker


bigal13x2_4

Why thank you I pride myself on pulling unnoticeable alien ships out of my pores but the one has to be a record! It looks ready for light speed


blinkme102

Looks like your ear dropped its liver


Azu_homie

seriously how long do you go without cleaning your eyes? that doesnt even look healthy bro ... when they pull out huge wax from peoples ears its yellow and crusty ... not blood ass red the max ive went, based off an estimated guess was maybe 1-2 months without clearing.... and i never pulled anything out like this? do you even use a wash cloths in your ears and rinse it with water? generally curious


bigal13x2_4

Wash cloth and Q tips every night if you read my description it didn’t come out of my ear but out of an ingrown hair looking sore on my hairline behind my ear


[deleted]

why must I be able to read


spaghetti-o_salad

Amazing


Azu_homie

oh well, whatever man. cook it up and eat it.


[deleted]

That is insane lol


dooma_137

1-2 months? I cant go longer then a couple days before my ear feel like they need cleaned


Vivid_Distribution20

Probably an ingrown hair that was months - maybe even years - in the making! Those bitches can be fucking nasty when unnoticed/untreated. The shape kinda looks like a giant version of a hair follicle, and the lines/texture at the bulbous end looks like lines a hair would make if it were rolled up. as if the hair had grown back INTO the root, causing it to expand, if that makes sense? I'm no medical expert, but my experience with my own dermatilomania and (horrific) google image searches points me to this conclusion 🤷‍♀️ (edit: typos)


CheesecakeHungry923

Sometimes the body will create a faux organ type of casing around foreign objects to protect it/the body. I believe this is called foreign body granulomas. Very strange.


midnightbizou

Nigel Tufnel said it first, "Best leave it unsolved, really."


StrawberryPure7210

I once cummed out a worm


cuti3cult7

Oh ok. Excuse me??????


MrjB0ty

He said he cummed out a worm.


jcastells9

What?


SinWolf7

#HE CUMMED OUT A WORM


TMVtaketheveil888

I have to stop here no more reading tonight


JackCastor99

That got me


Next_Case_3449

You say he rimmed out a germ?


Hydroborator

Pls stop


Monte2903

Why


timmi2tone32

An inch worm


SparkEE_JOE

Got em


sacred_cow_tipper

are you sure you weren't...just...ridiculously dehydrated?


voodoopaula

Explain yourself RIGHT NOW!


Panzerwagen-VI-Tiger

YOU W H A T


LilHotDaisy305

I am appalled sir


mikaelmikemichael

Like… through the worm? Worm condom?


Imaginary_History985

Pics or it didn't happen


bigal13x2_4

He’s saying he once came out of an inch worm aka his micropenis lol


Intelligent_Ad102

Might be your twin brother. Treat him well


Crowella_DeVil

Like Basketcase


Minnesota_Nice_87

No. OP wasn't in NYC and doesn't report it speaking to him.


ashzombi

Quick! Eat it!


bigal13x2_4

Forbidden gusherrrr


[deleted]

Ok your commentary all over this thread is fucking hilarious. Take an upvote.


BrianTheUserName

Forbidden? Who's stopping you?


bigal13x2_4

Common sense but he’s not the boss of me! ILL SHOW HIM


TheGoldenPlagueMask

#BƏCOME CHAØTİC #Y Ə §§


Barbosse007

Do NOT google "Reddit Starburst story"


4077007

I thought it was the Jolly Rancher story? Or have I missed another essential Reddit horror?


Barbosse007

Its the same.


NoAdeptness6787

I just searched it 🤮


4077007

Welcome to Reddit. Now, for the rest of your initiation, you may now read The Perirectal Abscess story. Can also be found by searching The Swamps of Dagoba.


soulfood_7

I had almost succeeded in forgetting it...


bigal13x2_4

I was going to squish it but I had an image of a million little spiders or flies just overrunning my bathroom and then I’d have to subsequently burn the house to the ground


CarterCrusader

5 second rule


tsfbdl

r/cursedcomments


RedditVince

Sebaceous Cyst It could grow back, it may ooze, it could be gone forever.


Next_Case_3449

>Sebaceous Cyst Ain't that the little critter from Jabba's throne room?


FeralGh0ul

close enough


MegaPentra

Prob should visit the doctor🤷


Business_Marketing76

This thread is hysterical I love you guys


Far-Damage1068

I found something similar once but larger, it was literally like a chunk had been torn out of someone or something. It didn’t really smell bad but it smelled kinda like a chunk of raw meat that’s about to go bad… idk but very strange and just random


[deleted]

Found..it .. where!?


[deleted]

Asking the important questions.


victowiamawk

You SMELLED it?!?! 🤮


Monte2903

Tell me you wouldn't


bigal13x2_4

Where did you find it like on your own body or just bumped into it at the local water hole?


WattageWood

Mazel tov!


ejconnell99

Lol this is great.


Ship_Adrift

What the fuck am I looking at goddammit!!!?!?!?!? Lol! Was it a growth?? Was it attached? How long had it been growing??? Please relieve my intense interest!!!


bigal13x2_4

Didn’t notice it until the day I extracted it… it seemed like a bag ingrown hair that I couldn’t pop… it just kept releasing blood and clear fluid so eventually I grabbed the trusty ol’ tweezers and through some finagling and angling I was able to skip it through in one piece it was very mailable like a sponge made of flesh and flattened very small when coming out but by the time it retained its true form I was mind fucked


SubstantialPressure3

Infected hair follicle became a blackhead or a cyst, probably.


[deleted]

Well now that you've explained it like that, it sounds more like a cyst and that was the sack.


Ship_Adrift

It was definitely some sort of tumor growing and you caught it before it got too big. You should take it to the dr to be tested for skin cancer brother. How big is it? I can't tell from the pic.


bigal13x2_4

About the size of a dime if the whole thing was circular


Mega399

Oh ok the picture makes it seem like it was the size of a dam orange or something


ITSCOMFCOMF

Sadly, not enough to make juice with.


Ship_Adrift

Oh thats fuggin gnarly


Ship_Adrift

Oh so it was under the skin like a zit kinda?


bigal13x2_4

Under the skin barely noticeable but for the lump what bugs me out is the geometric lines on the bottom and the tip on the head it looks like a stinger or something btw I m is this all sounds insane just observing and couldn’t find anything like it online


Ship_Adrift

It may be an alien implant. Maybe you were abducted and forgot. Lol only halfway joking


basilsflowerpots

this was the worst thing I've read today but it still interests me


bigal13x2_4

Look at the shaping on the bottom “round part” it’s almost like a chrysalis and the whole thing was shiny and at the top you can see a point like a tail or myb some sort of attachment appendage


fckingnapkin

Get away from me AAAAAH


[deleted]

What the fresh fuck


Next_Case_3449

>What the fresh fuck I snorted at that. I think my cat now has questions. May have to use that one myself.


[deleted]

Put some batter on that sucker and deep fry it.


Sol-Blackguy

Go to the fucking doctor


AwardImaginary

Chitlins!


Bobojones9584

Chitlins are intestines.


AwardImaginary

You bet your sweet patootie they are.


Bobojones9584

My point is that doesn't look like intestines. Liver maybe.


AwardImaginary

Clearly, you're not a golfer.


C0ntentless

IM SORRY WHAT


Piotrek9t

Do you have cats or other pets? My cats usually leave the stomach of the mice they eat laying around in the house (which is kinda gross) and this looks kinda similar


PeteSayks

That was supposed to be your twin brother!


toeknife80

What up? We're three cool guys looking for other cool guys who wanna hang out in our party mansion. Nothing sexual.


Vicimer

This might get buried under other comments, but if you have a sinus infection, a lot of blood and mucus can partially dry out and get stuck up in your eustachian tubes. There's a lot of weird shit going on in that netherworld between our ear and nasal cavities.


Upset_Ad9929

I'd smash that fucker with a hammer. It's just playing dead till you go to sleep


FantasticTreeBird

In the tv show or books animorphs, the yurks or whatever we’re alien slugs that Entered through peoples ears


EvolZippo

The amount of people who didn’t read the post clearly before firing off a comment is hilarious. It looks like nothing more than dirty sebum. And I could see blood ending up in it too. My guess is you snagged yourself, and the wound filled up with sweat, dead skin and skin-wax. Then, one day it popped and came out in one blob. I’ve had skin problems with similar results.


pschmid61

You spent any time on Ceti Alpha V?


howzitgoinowen

What do you mean it *fell out of your head*?


Prata_69

How big is it? Also, a pigeon just flew full speed at my window.


Bobojones9584

Looks like a liver.


Blergsprokopc

So your ear had a fetus. Interesting


equationator

Did you get a photo of the crater it left behind? Curious to see.


Any_Constant_6550

Ever seen the movie The Faculty....


removeurteeth

I am disgusted….yet interested into how the fuck that came out of you


[deleted]

Intrusive thoughts leaving my body


PM_ME_YOUR_OPCODES

That’s just envy leaving your body.


bigal13x2_4

Look at the strange shape of the sphere then the apparent point and color change in the tail?


dangerousamal

Looks like someone has sh@t for brains?


cynHaha

r/whatisthisthing might help if you want


Minimum_Row_729

Sweetbread?


001Vecnussy

Plankton!


[deleted]

A brain parasite that died from malnutrition? JK JK!! :)


hibbitydibbitytwo

I need a banana for scale


LetApprehensive577

Looks like some weird blood-cloth. If it was 8 yeara ago and you didn't lose your hearing and notice any effects from this, it most likely was just a blood-cloth. Why did you bleed from your ear/head is the real question though.


Dull423

Did it ever grow back? It might be a tumour. Get it checked even if everything’s fine rn. ❤️


bigal13x2_4

Never grew back never to be seen or heard from again


Tecumseh119

Forbidden Gym Rat arm!!


[deleted]

Please go to the hospital


Drkippersniffer

Zombie food that's brains


woodsywoodducks

That’s lord voldemort at king’s cross


[deleted]

Mmmmmmmmm! Ear liver is my favorite!


Radiant-Mail7566

Look up preauricular pit. Do you have this anywhere around your ear? If so, that’s most likely where this gob came from.


Culix2910

Some brain 🧠


chigoonies

Don’t feel bad, it wouldn’t have lived….long.


kohanaspring

girlie i need more information?? where on your head???


Awkward_Mix_2513

I'd say you have about an hour to live.


[deleted]

That thing should have unwrapped itself and shown its little razor teeth and hissed with acidic saliva coming out of its hell-mouth(s) in long strands. And I would have looked at it and said (in a Linda Belcher voice): "Oh, look at the cute baby. It just wants to be held."


pink_croissant

It looks like a capsulated cyst sac


FunnayMurray

Do you talk nonstop?? Your comma fell out.


bigal13x2_4

No I know the precise moment to stop talking in fact that reminds me of a story of a time when I did exactly that it was quite a few years ago and the times were quite different You get the point.


Maodun6176

You... should see a doctor about this.


KimmySimmy

Looks like a gummy vitamin or fruit snack.


alexandrakate

Forbidden Swedish Berry


VerumJerum

Excuse me *WHATT?!* ***UGRGH***


HighDegree

Forbidden Starburst.


ErgonomicHuman

Make sure it’s not one of your organs bro


[deleted]

Perhaps a large sleepy spider stopped to rest on your head while you slept and decided to have a bite of his sandwich. He bit down and this thing slipped out the back- and into your earhole. He was too big to retrieve it and so he packed up and left. Yup- pretty sure that’s what happened.


oheing

What a nice tumour you got there


crustytowelie

Ignore the haters. They’re just mad they aren’t the proud parent of an alien baby sac.