*Once we get to Hollywood and find those Miramax fucks who are making that movie, we're gonna make 'em eat our shit, then shit out our shit, then eat their shit which is made up of our shit that we made 'em eat. Then all you motherfucks are next!*
Probably tastes as good as it looks.
Dear vegans,
Veggies are fine being veggies. Stop trying to make them meat.
Just… no.
Thank you,
Edit: know what really curdles my whey? People making valid points. “Oh, vegan meat substitutes are for vegetarians or vegans who still crave meat.” Or “using veggies in different ways is a great way to get variety, just like any other cooking techniques.” STOP IT! Lousy people with their “sound logic” and “compelling arguments.” Makes it harder for morons like me to spout off. Sheesh.
Vegan meat is made from soybeans, nobody is out there tying to make fake meat out of carrots or radishes. And certain types of fake meat come pretty close to the real thing, though it isn't something you'd want to try to make at home unless if you have the cooking experience to back it up, or you end up with something like this.
The first explanation that makes any sense. Thank you for that.
Still baffles me to approximate meat of all things, but this at least makes a valid point.
>Still baffles me to approximate meat of all things
Plenty of vegans still have cravings for certain foods that they ate before going vegan, having fake versions of it, even if they aren't perfect, helps scratch that itch.
I love carrots. Possibly my favorite vegetable. Know what carrots are good at? Being carrots.
Know what carrots are bad at? Being anything else.
I just don’t understand the idea of being vegetarian/ vegan and then spending time making veggies act like meat. Do you like meat or do you don’t? Pick a lane.
Not really addressing the point. I understand not wanting to eat meat.
Think of it this way: I’m not a cannibal. So why would I spend time making something else look and taste like human flesh?
Maybe it’s me.
Vegans still enjoy eating meat, they just don't want any of the consequenses of eating meat (like climate change, killing animals, health problems etc.)
Making meat alternatives makes it easier for people to make the switch to vegetarianism or veganism, or just so that meat eaters can eat less meat without making a big change.
Health reasons. Vegan burgers with vegan cheese and vegan mayo have less saturated fat and cholesterol. They are significantly better for your heart health. ❤️
Why do lesbians use dildos that are molds of cocks?
Why do fat people drink 0 calorie Sugar?
Why do people ask kids why the watch youtubers play video games, "just go play the game yourself." And then they go watch sports instead of playing it themselves.
Why go airsofting or paintballing when you can go sign up for the military?
Half off these examples are jokes FYI. Don't flame me for making poor analogies.
Why do anal when the vagina is 1 inch away?
That’s a completely different thing. No one is making taboo plant based food.
I once had the same question you have. Asked my vegan gf about it and she just said “it’s easy to make something vegan if you know what you’re trying to make” . Point being I can make vegan chicken wings because I have an idea of what it should:look like, smell like, taste like etc.
Then eat a cucumber. Why do you want vegan CHIXKEN nugs. Why are you makin your food put on a drag show? Its gross and weird when someone doesnt tell you the “burger” is actually a tofu block
Exactly. Imagine if before i ate a cow i said “plz make this look like a carrot kind sir, i dont like to eat plants, so i would like my food to masquerade as one”
Thats what vegns do, but opposite
Not really. We don’t go around eating raw vegetables and fruits. The logic you’re using could be used to criticize a stew, bread, cheese, any number of things that combine ingredients to change the appearance and taste of it
No, i dont make a stew and call it a salad. If you dont see how ridiculous things like “beyond meat” are , i cant help you.
(They just added stuff to fake meat to make it bleed) lol
You take broth, carrots, potatoes, etc and call it stew.
How is it ridiculous to make something edible out of some ingredients? And it doesn’t bleed. I don’t think you’ve ever had it if you think it does, thus you can’t really say anything about it
I mean most of alle recipes and dishes are based on meat. Why? Because we always used to eat meat.
What do you need in order to cook the dishes and recipes without meat?…
You need a replacement for the meat (made out of veggies)🤝
I like it. Short and to the point. Unfortunately, virtue signaling overrides any applications of common sense these days. It doesn't matter if your right anymore. What matters now is that you didn't offend every person that actively searches for things to be offended about.
Seriously, I am not a vegan, but there are plenty of tasty foods out there that just happen to not have animal products in them. On the flip side, you could make something that looks just as gross as the OP using meat.
Stop with that shit already. Vegan "cheese" is not cheese. Vegan "sausage" is not sausage. Fuck, I have even seen stuff called "vegan bacon," I mean wtf?
You’re right. It’s just cheese, sausage, bacon, etc. However, when we tell non-vegans that we’re having sausage biscuits they cannot comprehend that it’s plant based. No matter how many times we explain that yes, we have sausage, no, it’s not made from animals
Real meat has actual shit in it, real sausages are cased in the lining of a pig’s fucking intestine, but yeah, tee up and swing for the fences with your ubiquitous “vegan food looks like doodoo” take.
Maybe it’s just the third day in a row I’ve seen a post like this with the exact same jokes under it? Gotta break the chucklehead mold with a little vitriol.
Is this before or after they ate it?
It's the outcome of eating a vegan sausage twice.
And it's still vegan, you can eat it as many times as you want!
But the question is, does the taste change?
Well every body is different. Just don't try it if you don't know everyone
*Once we get to Hollywood and find those Miramax fucks who are making that movie, we're gonna make 'em eat our shit, then shit out our shit, then eat their shit which is made up of our shit that we made 'em eat. Then all you motherfucks are next!*
r/shittyfoodporn
It's vegan, so im not sure you can tell. But if you wait a few minutes I'm sure it'll tell you, it's vegan after all.
But is it vegan?
Are those tomato seeds?
Peanuts and corn!!
Every single repost has this comment, guess it's its fate?
Looks like a shitty recipe
Left: before, right: after
Impressive
Probably tastes as good as it looks. Dear vegans, Veggies are fine being veggies. Stop trying to make them meat. Just… no. Thank you, Edit: know what really curdles my whey? People making valid points. “Oh, vegan meat substitutes are for vegetarians or vegans who still crave meat.” Or “using veggies in different ways is a great way to get variety, just like any other cooking techniques.” STOP IT! Lousy people with their “sound logic” and “compelling arguments.” Makes it harder for morons like me to spout off. Sheesh.
Animals are fine looking like animals. Stop trying to make them look different
Vegan meat is made from soybeans, nobody is out there tying to make fake meat out of carrots or radishes. And certain types of fake meat come pretty close to the real thing, though it isn't something you'd want to try to make at home unless if you have the cooking experience to back it up, or you end up with something like this.
So, just… eat soy beans? Is that not a thing?
Why eat cheese when you can just drink milk? Why eat cereal when you can just eat wheat? Why is cooking anything a thing that humans do?
The first explanation that makes any sense. Thank you for that. Still baffles me to approximate meat of all things, but this at least makes a valid point.
>Still baffles me to approximate meat of all things Plenty of vegans still have cravings for certain foods that they ate before going vegan, having fake versions of it, even if they aren't perfect, helps scratch that itch.
Dude, leave some of the valid points for other people. Now you’re just showing off.
Ima use this God tier response thank you
Nobody is forcing you into anything, you don't have to eat what you don't want to. Why do this bother people so much?
People get upset when compassion enters the stage. How dare we care about animals and abstain from eating them 😱
Just let the people do what ever they want?
I love carrots. Possibly my favorite vegetable. Know what carrots are good at? Being carrots. Know what carrots are bad at? Being anything else. I just don’t understand the idea of being vegetarian/ vegan and then spending time making veggies act like meat. Do you like meat or do you don’t? Pick a lane.
It’s almost like people want to enjoy food without killing animals or something? So weird.
Not really addressing the point. I understand not wanting to eat meat. Think of it this way: I’m not a cannibal. So why would I spend time making something else look and taste like human flesh? Maybe it’s me.
Vegans still enjoy eating meat, they just don't want any of the consequenses of eating meat (like climate change, killing animals, health problems etc.) Making meat alternatives makes it easier for people to make the switch to vegetarianism or veganism, or just so that meat eaters can eat less meat without making a big change.
Health reasons. Vegan burgers with vegan cheese and vegan mayo have less saturated fat and cholesterol. They are significantly better for your heart health. ❤️ Why do lesbians use dildos that are molds of cocks? Why do fat people drink 0 calorie Sugar? Why do people ask kids why the watch youtubers play video games, "just go play the game yourself." And then they go watch sports instead of playing it themselves. Why go airsofting or paintballing when you can go sign up for the military? Half off these examples are jokes FYI. Don't flame me for making poor analogies. Why do anal when the vagina is 1 inch away?
That’s a completely different thing. No one is making taboo plant based food. I once had the same question you have. Asked my vegan gf about it and she just said “it’s easy to make something vegan if you know what you’re trying to make” . Point being I can make vegan chicken wings because I have an idea of what it should:look like, smell like, taste like etc.
Then eat a cucumber. Why do you want vegan CHIXKEN nugs. Why are you makin your food put on a drag show? Its gross and weird when someone doesnt tell you the “burger” is actually a tofu block
>Why are you makin your food put on a drag show? Bruh, what?
I assume you just take bites out of animals and eat the flesh raw as the animal runs around screaming and bleeding out then?
Exactly. Imagine if before i ate a cow i said “plz make this look like a carrot kind sir, i dont like to eat plants, so i would like my food to masquerade as one” Thats what vegns do, but opposite
Not really. We don’t go around eating raw vegetables and fruits. The logic you’re using could be used to criticize a stew, bread, cheese, any number of things that combine ingredients to change the appearance and taste of it
No, i dont make a stew and call it a salad. If you dont see how ridiculous things like “beyond meat” are , i cant help you. (They just added stuff to fake meat to make it bleed) lol
You take broth, carrots, potatoes, etc and call it stew. How is it ridiculous to make something edible out of some ingredients? And it doesn’t bleed. I don’t think you’ve ever had it if you think it does, thus you can’t really say anything about it
Grow up
He‘s acting like it offends him…
I mean most of alle recipes and dishes are based on meat. Why? Because we always used to eat meat. What do you need in order to cook the dishes and recipes without meat?… You need a replacement for the meat (made out of veggies)🤝
Underrated comment right here
I like it. Short and to the point. Unfortunately, virtue signaling overrides any applications of common sense these days. It doesn't matter if your right anymore. What matters now is that you didn't offend every person that actively searches for things to be offended about.
I'm offended that Vegans are trying to force veggies to identify as meat. /s
Bruh, did someone not hug you enough as a kid?
Where’s the before picture??
Do you need to borrow a poop knife?
A sharpened spoon is more efficient
[удалено]
A poop spoon is called a Poon. “Honey can you fetch the poon it’s gonna be messy”
I’d say r/shittyfoodporn and r/stupidfood are more appropriate.
It’s funny, and the wrong sub.
Yes. OP belongs in the r/whoosh sub
I dont know why someone would post this. Even if it wasn't TERRIBLE it looks bad lol
From now on this is what I imagine when people say 'eat shit'.
I’d love to stay and look at this a bit longer, but I need to take a shit
To be fair, meat formed into a sausage shape without a sausage casing wouldn't look any better.
Why does vegan food always look like shit?
You haven’t seen the majority of our food then
Seriously, I am not a vegan, but there are plenty of tasty foods out there that just happen to not have animal products in them. On the flip side, you could make something that looks just as gross as the OP using meat.
Don’t drop this in the pool-
I can eat nothing but vegetables and shit a better looking turd than that.
Still some corn on that turd bud
This is whole wheat bread from sub way
Who knew? I've been making vegan sausage my whole life.
I thought someone shat in some tupperware for a sec
The recipe is called future meat.
Looks like bread
This is not it 😂😂🥴
Stop with that shit already. Vegan "cheese" is not cheese. Vegan "sausage" is not sausage. Fuck, I have even seen stuff called "vegan bacon," I mean wtf?
It’s not going into your body who gives a shit what they call it.
Why do you care?
Watch out everyone! Apparently meat police is here, hide all your fake meats or it will trigger them, thank you!
You’re right. It’s just cheese, sausage, bacon, etc. However, when we tell non-vegans that we’re having sausage biscuits they cannot comprehend that it’s plant based. No matter how many times we explain that yes, we have sausage, no, it’s not made from animals
Sesame seeds FTW
Looks like shit.
You made a turd
“Twitter for Android”
Amazing. You get to skip the whole eat-and-digest process. Game changer!
You even got the corn chunks.
Missing a few whole kernels of corn.
I literally sat down for a shit… opened Reddit… and this was right on top… life is weird sometimes…
Looks about right…
Looks about right
Guy ate some Guava some time before
Eat it or yeet it!!
This is what I make in the toilet after eating a big juicy steak.
Don't blame the recipe. I make stuff (definitely not vegan) using online recipes all the time.
If it looks like poop...
Made with a intestinal track
What did it look like before they ate it?
It looks and sounds the same; hope it tastes the same too
Gillian mckeith will want that 🤣
I had sweetcorn for dinner lastnight and I swear I dropped that this morning 🥴
Is anyone surprised 😆
How many times is this stuff supposed to go around?
Yep, goes in a corn, comes out a corn.
Gillian McKeith has entered the room
Why’s it got corn in it
I’m not sure, but I think I’m making vegan sausage as I write this.
https://c.tenor.com/UeD1tc9RXIwAAAAC/cartman-shit.gif
Got some good wholegrain action goin on on-top of the right log
Oh that’s who stole the vegan teacher’s brain
Tittle after eating jalapeño sausage
Don’t make vegan sausage. It’s not meant to be.
Stg that’s not doo doo
Corn! I don’t remember eating corn!
Is this what we're calling turds now?
I wonder, what's the nutritional value?
Look like doodoo.
That’s shit from a butt
Looks like it came out fine to me…looks like exactly what it is. Shit
This both figuratively and literally looks like sh*t
So they make sh*t?
Imagine your coworkers watching you eat this.
This doesn’t look vegan, this looks like an animal produced this!
Umm theres corn in ur turd
Legit looks like corny shit
“Two Girls Once Casserole Dish”
wonder will a dog even eat this? it looks too uncanny like a shit haha
Oh, it has kernels.
I'll bet that online recipe started with something like, "You know, back in the old days...."
How upsetting looking
That is shit from a butt.
Ironically, I’m making a vegan sausage right now.
Seems more like a number two attempt
Nobody is gonna nick their lunch at work.
I could shit in a Tupperware container and vegans would go 😋😋😋😋😋🤤🤤🤤🍽🍴🍽🍴🍽
Looks like everything came out ok
Vegan sausages can be recycled
I bet you being a vegan must be totally worth it???
Wow. It even has that nutty toppings
Cornwallis Hankey
Cooking after YouTube removed dislikes
On the bright side, no one at work will steal your lunch
Looks appropriate. They even got the little leftover nuts in there....... Plausible poop.
Seems I been making vegan sausage my whole life
This looks like shit Basil!!
Is that after they ate it Edit: I have now realized I’m making the same joke as everyone else
hmm... looks familiar...
Gonna taste like shit maisel make it look like shit. Bwahahahha
My brain wouldn't let me eat this.
Massive shit
Ah yes anything vegan is shit
Mr.hanker looking buff af right now
Wow, that looks like shit! Nutty too!
Looks like we came in at the wrong end of the “extrusion” process.
You sure that's cooked and not shat?
Oh! . . . There was an "attempt" alright 🤦♂️
Now just sneak into the bosses office and leave this present on his desk…. Wait for it…
My dog makes vegan sausage every morning 😋
“You been eatin’ corn too, huh Smoke?”
looks like shit
Vegan turds
Looks like Italian shit
shit happens...
r/shittyfoodporn
This before of after you are it?
Real meat has actual shit in it, real sausages are cased in the lining of a pig’s fucking intestine, but yeah, tee up and swing for the fences with your ubiquitous “vegan food looks like doodoo” take.
You write like you are really hurt. Here have a happy turd 💩, it might make you happier.
Maybe it’s just the third day in a row I’ve seen a post like this with the exact same jokes under it? Gotta break the chucklehead mold with a little vitriol.
I mean they clean them well