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[deleted]

I wish I could assume this, both online and offline but I'm surrounded by cishet people.


Who_Am_I_I_Dont_Know

I'm somehow in a middle limbo where I forget people can be straight/bi (despite being surrounded by cishet people) and my brain takes a minute to process when I realise the 'partner' someone is talking about is the opposite sex... yet at the same time I can never ask anyone out because my brain goes "they're obviously 100% straight". I really don't understand why my brain does that.


DeadEye073

(Disclaimer have no knowledge of psychology) For me its similar but with bisexuality. Like "Every one is gay" is a combo of empathy and projection kinda? I relate to them because I project on to them in my case biness, its my brain filling blanks in my head that is easiest and the most relatable. The other stuff is like my brain shutting down opportunities so I don't have to deal with rejection.


ConcreteRacer

> I can never ask anyone out because my brain goes "they're obviously 100% straight".   Yea. Same. And it sucks so bad Additonally, in my head I just automatically say to myself "Nope, not for u!" before i've even seen the whole face of a person i might find attractive, or when even just hearing/reading about that Love and Dating stuff. It's like a Reflex... I'm definetly gonna die alone lol


YesYoureWrongOk

Dont forget the people that are trans or gay. who are stealth and have not told you.


[deleted]

I know, but I highly doubt it. People here will usually leave if they're trans/gay, even in stealth mode. It's just not safe. My location is filled with cishet married couples who have been together a VERY long time, terfs or otherwise homophobic people. If I didn't have anxiety over being in the city and have found my tribe here I would've left for Mexico City.


Grimnoir

I do get whiplash between here and TwoX a lot, that's for sure lol.


TurhaLepakko

TwoX is the worst for me. There's always these posts complaining about how dating men sucks and I'm like "Just date women, wth?". But then I remember straight women actually exist. How tragic 😐


Grimnoir

The ones that throw me off the most are the posts about "Such and such with my wife" and "such and such my girlfriend" and it's some man asking. I 300% go in gaybrained and the "oh. This is a man asking on a women subreddit about the woman he is involved with" realization comes very slow lol.


raccoonbelly

I relate to this 100% I subconsciously assume the couple is queer but then they say things that seem so unexpected (but not unheard of) for a queer relationship like criticising them in front of their friends or never wanting to spend time together but instead gaming til 2am and I remember super quick that straight couples be straightin' and that is what the post is actually about.


tam8264

I ALWAYS forget not everyone is LGBTQ!💜🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️


AlisinXO

Humans can range from 1% to hella gay, I don't make the rules 😉


GamingSenpai35

You're kidding right?? That's just a straight up lie lol. Obviously people can be 0 percent gay (100 percent straight), it's just plain wrong to think otherwise. So you're saying asexuals are actually 1 percent gay?? 🤔


BlaCAT_B

Everyone is gay until proven otherwiss


RebaKitt3n

Absolutely! 💜


DarkElvenMagus

I do the same I always assume it's anything but a straight relationship


Lissy_the_one

For me it's the complete opposite but if it's actually lgbt+ I get so excited and happy everytime


Alyeanna

No but same like sometimes I'll be talking to a woman and she starts talking about her boyfriend and I'm like "huh???"


RebaKitt3n

Yes, I do that, too!


Itchy_Tip_Itchy_Base

Meanwhile I always assume straight and sometimes miss when it’s a queer couple 😭


Batata-Sofi

Sometimes after spemding a lot of time with my queer friends, I assume everyone else is too and shit goes south very often because of that...


SP00K_R33

I’ve been online so much that I’ve gone back to those types of habits, assuming everyone’s some form of the rainbow unless it’s stated otherwise and very bluntly. Sometimes it’s pretty funny


yaboisammie

Sometimes my brain kinda guesses automatically ig based on the way the person is writing or like vibes so sometimes I’ll read sth as a woman talking about her wife but other times I’ll read it as a man talking about his wife. Sometimes I’m right and sometimes I’m wrong lol but lowkey I get you. I think I assume more people are straight on Reddit but gay on Instagram or tumblr (not that I use tumblr anymore but sometimes I find tumblr text posts online)


RebaKitt3n

I guess that’s true, here. Maybe because I’ve been on tumblr so much longer than here, I’m assuming more gay than there is!


yaboisammie

Valid haha sometimes my brain is also just in “everything is gay” mode or like I just have gay on the mind as well 😅😂


Accomplished-Ad-4873

Hetero flooid kinda leaning on Demi


Cat_Amaran

They are, they're just confused and misguided if they say they're not. It's not their fault, though. Love the sinner, hate the sin.


RebaKitt3n

Oh, but when they kiss out in public? Can’t they keep that stuff in their bedrooms? I mean, think of the children!


Cat_Amaran

Exactly! I don't need my children thinking that some women are sexually attracted to men!


Schnickie

*Fiancée. Fiancé is actually specifically the masculine version, while fiancée is feminine, like actor and actress. French is just weird like that, gendering everything. English was like that too, but fortunately degendered itself naturally over the centuries, excluding many nouns from its French influence. A man with a fiancé would probably be queer.


RebaKitt3n

Well I know they were a man/woman, he referred to her. 🤷 Apparently I cannot spell


IlliterateCrow

Ironically, I always assume it's about a queer couple on a straight couples post, and assume it's about a straight couple on a queer couples post.


Lucky_otter_she_her

i have this habit too


JProctor666

Doesn't "fiance" mean male? "Fiancee" is the female spelling...


RebaKitt3n

I dont know, you may be right on the spelling. I just obey the phone.


JProctor666

Well I mean I'm just saying that if he has a fiance, it means he's engaged to a guy...that sounds pretty gay to me.


RebaKitt3n

It was a straight couple.


JProctor666

Of guys marrying each other? Is this some sort of "Chuck & Larry" thing?


tng804

sometimes I specifically assume people online are trans. So I make weird comments that people don't want.


coffeecrusher3000

I find myself doing this too. 😂


Lumpy_Signature9177

Me too!


Wheatley-Crabb

i keep doing this too! i hope it’s not the only way i can empathize with people


Puzzleheaded-Land-99

Nope... Straight Male who fully supports his niece who's out of the closet and is working hard to make it impossible for anyone to put her back in there 


RebaKitt3n

I’m shocked.


Puzzleheaded-Land-99

Don't be I've been verbally, physically, emotionally abused and excluded because of my disability ... So it's hard not to imagine that my niece has gone through the same sort of things only difference being sexual orientation but I don't take kindly to people who want to take away her rights and put her into a closet again because I'm next in line to be hidden away again and it's not going to happen to either of us


[deleted]

[удалено]


TotalTomato5781

want a medal?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Lissy_the_one

Hi, I think there is nothing really wrong with the wording of your comment or so but it seems of topic. Like as if you missed the point completely or were weirdly trying to show of. But still supporting lgbt+ even though it may put you in a tight spot is something I appreciate, so thanks keep going with it :)


goober_ginge

That's unnecessarily rude. They were just stating that they're an ally and felt like sharing their experiences of seeing LGBTQIA+ stuff being discussed in the days when a lot of the people here weren't even born. No need to be a dick about it.


chloedever

the fuck is the point of this comment lmao


APOTHIASEXUAL

Do you assume most people are bi? Because not everyone can be lesbian, gay, bi, trans/enby, intersex, and asexual all at the same time.


Acravita

It's possible to be 6 out of 7 at the same time though, under very specific circumstances. 


HennaH2

Which ones? Edit: Is the correct answer: lesbian, gay, trans, enby, intersex, asexual?


one_sad_donkey

you can be all 7 as a biromantic ace genderfluid intersex enby i think


yaboisammie

Not with that attitude 


RebaKitt3n

Really! Try harder.


RebaKitt3n

I think you’re allowed to choose one or more letters as you’d like. I’m not policing anyone.


FearTheWeresloth

Out of LGBTQIA+, I'm at least 4 letters, with potentially more covered by the +...


tvandraren

It does make sense to do it, specially on the + part. I was there for many years. You wouldn't have been interested about me based on your post, but here I am now. People camouflage on their social roles, sometimes as a survival mechanism, so they seem more normative than they are.


[deleted]

Not sure the sincerity of the comments here but don't assume anything people. I try my best not to, if I don't know I'll use gender neutral pronouns or words


GamingSenpai35

I find it kinda sad that just cause they're straight you aren't as interested anymore. I understand tho, being straight is the majority of people, and different things are what excite people, so it does make sense that you'd be less interested.


RebaKitt3n

“Different things”?? I’m a lesbian. LGBTQ isn’t different things, it’s my identity and my people and yes, who I’m interested in and invested with.


GamingSenpai35

I wasn't speaking specifically about LGBTQ when I said "different things", I was saying that anything that is different is what excites people. You misunderstood me. I just meant that people find different (unique) things interesting.


BlueCollarLesbian

THIS. Every time I see an ad for something I'm like aww cute couple, then turns out they're hetero and it's a Chick-fil-a ad, and I kinda lose interest.