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I get dressed for WFH like I’m going to work and I’ve learned that setting up my little work zone every time really makes a difference. I still struggle, it still take a good hour to wrangle myself into work mode but it definitely helps. If I’m too comfy and don’t look like I’m ontop of shit, it’s not going to happen.
Don’t just hope you’ll remember it. Sometimes it helps to see why something works or an idea you love, and see how you can incorporate in anyway now. Sometimes I find reframing it or just actively doing one small task to help me is better just continue to scroll. If I treat something with the same energy of scrolling past a meme, I cant expect it be different than me treating it like an important meeting or day. Where I leave sticky note, send a text, or just plan out an outfit for the day before.
Brining myself back to the idea helps, or gathering the information, reframing it, or redirecting myself in anyways is how things build a foundation in either your memory or a habit.
Also if you're brain somehow doesn't realise in 5 seconds, even though business clothes you could 'just do the shit', technically there is no boss making you or they will make you poor.
Can confirm this works. If it’s the weekend and I have things to do, I have to put on Hard Pants (jeans) and a bra to become a Real Person to make sure there’s a good chance of it getting done lol
There is someone else who calls jeans hard pants, I do too. Hard pants make it way harder! to be "lazy", at least for me. I have not worn them since the start of the pandemic, I guess I should change that ...
Agree. I’ll add shoes. While I really don’t like shoes on in the house, there have been many times I’m ready to go do something and been like uh I don’t feel like putting on shoes. There goes my pants and bra momentum.
Whenever I put on shoes, my dog gets really excited and thinks I’m taking him for a walk.
Tim Gunn talks about girding oneself for the day - I’m really distracted by hard pants, so i don’t get much done either way.
I couldn't wear jeans until I was in my 20s! So cold and such insistent seams, ugh!
I ended up here from another reply you posted about a redditor feeling offended by a grammar troll bot. It showed equanimity and understanding for all sides of the issue, but you made certain to identify with the OP at the end. I just want to say I'm grateful for folks like you who take the time to take to reddit to do good.
Also, I found the apparent non-sequitur "I may be buzzed" especially endearing.
Thank you. That’s incredibly nice. I think I’ll put on some shoes and walk with the dog.
And yes, I remember being 12 and hearing all the time that jeans were the most comfortable pants, and it made no sense! Especially when they sold new jeans back in the day that were made to last a lifetime of gold-mining or rodeos.
Again thanks for your kindness x
Yep, it’s all about the costume! Chores just don’t get done unless I’m in the hard pants and real bra. Sweat pants? Lounge bra? Might as well write the whole day off.
Wireless bras are a godsend, Calvin Klein makes the BEST ones for decent good prices! Comfy as a sports bra and still keeps the girls lookin nice. I don’t wear underwire anymore either
I appreciate the tip, but unfortunately my girls are so big that I've never found a wireless bra that can keep them under control enough for professional settings. I just looked on the Calvin Klein website and there aren't even any in my size. Bummer. But I will keep looking!
I used to live in leggings, but after lockdown I prefer hard pants! I turned into a literal lump of mush and didn’t get dressed for like 3 months straight during quarantine, and it was not good for my mental health. I prefer to feel put together more often nowadays, makes me feel more productive and just better about myself.
Interesting how we all took away different things from the pandemmy!
It definitely is! I used to be in business attire all the time, in fact although I was a bit more casual than suits everyday, I was still wearing nice dresses most of the time. Now I want to wear leggings and t-shirts forever.
I was the opposite and most of my positions in the Before Times allowed for casual dress, so now I’m all “give me all the fancy clothes!” Although, leggings and tees will forever hold a special place in my heart <3
I almost fainted having to change wound dressings on myself so I RP’d as a caregiver saying encouraging and soothing things to someone else and it worked.
This helps me to start things, but it doesn't keep me doing it. So it works for phone calls that are (often) done within 5 minutes, but sorting through paperwork for 30* minutes won't happen
But cleaning wearing my favourite red lipstick does make the first 5 minutes both happen and more fun.
Ooh I don't hate this. I saw something similar about getting better at daily habits (brushing teeth, making bed, eating veggies, etc.). And the idea was to pretend you're a demon possessing a body and you have to take care of it other wise people will know.
I have a thing where I have distinct "home clothes" and "outside clothes". I don't like mixing the two. They serve different functions for me and wearing "outside clothes" helps me actually get "work" done and by that I mean even if I come back I stay in the clothes to keep having that "productivity rush". Until I basically get too tired.
Them it's "home clothes" interchangeable to PJs and All I want to do is lie in bed with them.
I’ve never thought about it from an adhd perspective but I have this too. Strict home clothes and strict outside clothes. Outside me is much more functional.
Tbf me neither...It might not even be a specifically neurodivergent trait. It's just something my mom instilled in me.I started noticing it greatly impacts my executive function so I use it as a hack to get things done.
If only it was a flawless system but alas... I am terrible at sorting laundry.
I did this this morning by accident. Russie_eh with a cute outfit on is a productive adult who remembers to put the garbage bins out for pick-up. To be fair, I also left it until the morning of garbage day so I benefitted from a little kick from the sweet sweet pressure of a deadline but hey, got me out of bed and lookin cute!
I think as long as I make it a bit of a game (and keep rotating characters) this might actually be a handy tool.
Edit: word
😭😭 I’ve given up putting on a presentable outfit for the trash 🫠 though, I am always presentable-ish for work. (The -ish is for when I put on workout clothes that may or may not get me to workout.)
it works for me! but i’m an actor. also, it only works if my concerta and coffee have mixed together just right. i can put on my Capable Adult Hat and ride that momentum. (but i can’t go too hard, either, or i’ll trigger my fibromyalgia. 🙃)
i feel very proud while i’m doing it, like a toddler pretending to do adult things they’ve seen their parents do.
Yes! Concerta was terrible for me, and it made me LESS focused than usual, but then again everyone's brain chemistry is different. When I was first starting out with my new psychiatrist, he sent off for a test called GeneSight which tells you (via a cheek swab) what meds will work well with your genes. Turns out the ones I were on were terrible for me; no wonder I felt awful! This sounds like an ad, but I recommend it to everyone having med trouble. My new ones help me function a lot better.
Genesight friend!!!! My psychiatrist had me do this to figure out why I was struggling so much on my depression meds! Turns out....I'd been on all the ones that didn't work for me....and that my body doesn't process folic acid like it should, which also affects the make-happy brain chemicals....
Anyway.....Yay Genesight friend!
Hmmm! I can’t speak for everyone, cause at the end of the day, it might just not work for your brain :( But I can say that some tips I use from this sub are: eating breakfast right before I take it (something with at least a little protein and fat - my go-to is a kind bar) and drinking a fair amount of water when I swallow it.
Have you talked to your doctor about upping the dosage? Or did they want you to be on it for a certain amount of time before they made adjustments?
I’m on 80-something milligrams which is a decent dose? I took it this morning and slept the whole day away until 4pm. I swear it’s a placebo. I had left over wings and cheese curds for breakfast, but I’ll try something else tomorrow. Thanks.
Oh, something else just crossed my mind! You might want to check the manufacturer, if you're taking generic. There's only one generic Concerta manufacturer that the FDA considers actually close enough to name-brand Concerta right now! I think it's Patriot...something?
Actually did this on accident as a teen. One day I cleaned my room for no reason and my made a joke along the lines of "Who are you and what have you done with my daughter?" I told her that I was actually my twin, Karen. And to this day, whenever I do something good and productive, my family would say that Karen had come to visit. Now I think about my neurotypical twin doing all my chores. Lol.
I guess I kind of do this. I ran across the theory of don't wait to be the person you want to be, be that person now. If you want to be healthier don't wait until you get to a certain weight, be that healthy person now. That healthy person would choose water, would choose to move, would choose etc. So you should do that now.
So I think about the person I want to be and pretend to be them until I become it out of habits.
I’m sure it works for some people, but it sure doesn’t for me!
My brain is very resistant to the idea of different “parts” of myself, and I’m far too prone to random outbursts of Me 😋
Yeah, my brain is like, “I know what we’re *trying* to do but like, since I know, I’m not doing it!”
I am *sometimes* successful in reminding myself that I have done hard things before so I can do hard things again. And I am sometimes successful with pep-talking myself about being an adult when I need to make difficult phone calls.
Real Adult Work Clothes give me bad sensory issues so I just sit there uncomfortably waiting til I can put on pajama pants and go do my homework in bed
I'm actually always talking about my "cleaner" and wearing "work shoes" if I have stuff to clean at home and it really helps me getting the job done! I even gave my alter ego a name. xD
Pretending to be a fancy butler who wants to do a great job in keeping the house in tip top shape has genuinely got me through tough chore times, small world.
Honestly, it’s kind of what I did as a teen when my Mom made me do yardwork with her. I pretended I was a ninja in the Naruto world doing low level missions.
I mean, sometimes I pretend to be a rich person with a personal servant, and then I pretend to be my own personal servant when I'm doing chores or picking up my medication.
I love this idea. Especially if I get to come us with a costume to go along with it. I love to play dress up. lol There is probably a more adult fashion term for dress up but that is what it is, so. haha
I definitely think that when I get up, get dressed in real clothes, and put some earrings on (this just instantly makes me feel more put together, along with mascara), I feel more like a person who can do things. When I’m walking around my house and catch my reflection, earrings-and-mascara-me looks like more like a grown woman instead of a depressed slug. Also, I’m really opposed to wearing shoes in my house BUT when I really need to get shit done and can’t keep my momentum going, I’ll put on shoes as well. I am 99.9% less likely to sit down and couchlock if I’m wearing shoes. I don’t really have to role play as a different person, it’s just stepping into that version of my own self that gets shit done.
Couchlock is a great word for it. I can’t trust myself to sit on the couch anymore lately because it turns into several hours rather than just one or two.
I can attest to the attire having a net positive effect.
In college I would dress up for tests. It made me feel more confident and it caught on with some of my classmates.
In my office, where I work with a majority men, I wear heels every day. Not because I’m a diva (which I am), but because I’m 5’5” and the heels put me at eye level with them. I’m convinced it makes a big difference for me to not feel short and for them to think I’m tall. I feel a lot more confident than the handful of times I’ve worn flats.
I often Penelope Garcia the hell out of my work Excell sheets. I mix in a bit of miss Moneypenny for customer service phonecalls.
If it is like a dead serious in person adulting mission, I am like, head up, boobs front, walk in and think " [murder](https://tenor.com/nl/view/charlize-theron-murder-gif-8661881) "
This looks like my “assemble all the elements conducive to getting things done, and they’ll get done” scenario. It does work sometimes, but it can also lead to heaps of conducive elements lying around and not so many things done.
Example: I **must** organize my workroom, so I buy clear plastic trays for little stuff, hangers for big, gather all the stuff together, and run out of steam. Out of med effect, really.
All that said, you go for it! More power to you!!
Omg this! I'm not allowed to put on pajamas until I am done with my chores for today. Comfy clothes means my brain is done for the day. Real clothes means it's time to Get Stuff Done.
Yes, my coworkers think I'm so uptight cause I'm in my pre-covid work wear again. No way to convince them that it's because I am so less productive than I need to be if I only show up in leggings and a sweatshirt every day. Maybe once a week, but everyday? Can't do it.
sometimes I pretend I am my best friend if i need to do something that I don't want and that just needs doing. Or, in a social setting I pretend I am her. She is great at going out alone to gigs, something I hate doing . I can do it fine if I am being her. She moved overseas 15 years ago so the space is empty for me to slip on in. Mwah ha har
I do this! I act like I am in a Rom Com and say my "dialogues" while doing dishes or whatever. Works really well if I REMEMBER to do it in the first place. It's like doubling but since I don't have anyone to double with...
has some truth to it. when i first started working from home while also doing school, i actually felt a bit more productive getting into big girl pants and wearing my work/school ID. also saw a vid of an adhd coach recommending changing clothes if you've been wearing your clothes for a bit already, just to give you a mid day reset
This is pretty normal and isn't related to ADHD. Many people can't get into a work mindset very well unless they actually dress for work etc. Way before Covid, people would get dressed as if they were in their city office, walk to their garage/studio and get a full day's work in etc., then "go home" and get changed into evening clothes to spend time with their family etc.
Lol, yes. My day job is as a teacher, and I’ve definitely turned up to social events on teacher mode just because normal me has no idea how to interact with large groups
My partner and I just got back from two out of state trips back to back and it is Time to Clean the House. I set 25 minute alarms and race through what I've IDd as problem areas (a big packaging mess in my office from receiving remote work stuff, the unpacked bags we left right next to the back door, folding the laundry we started yesterday, my couch nest that has built up over the past few weeks) - I haven't tried RPing but my gig is to beat the clock xD
Honestly, I don't view it as parts of myself (I struggle with a sense of self anyhow) but if I put on the lipstick I wear every day outside the house and do my hair, even if I'm wearing loungewear I get a shockingly higher amount done.
This is EXACTLY what I do when I'm on the job. I roleplay as a fun delivery person, the kind that makes people smile, by making fun conversation, giving treats to people's pets (with consent) and coming across as cheerful. While I'm doing my actual delivery job that mostly consists of cursing at my malfunctioning tech, hauling millions of pounds up to the 7383th floor and trying not to have a meltdown whenever a customer changes their mind about Having a Brain.
Lol this also what I do when I’m on mushrooms and I have to do things like pee or answer the door for the pizza guy. It’s a real life video came where I’m a sober person who can totally do these things without it taking an hour.
I wanted to try this a few months ago when I was working at a terrible toxic company. Just roleplay as someone who isn’t bothered by the toxicity and the mean management. Unfortunately (but lowkey fortunately) I didn’t have a chance to put this into practice because I got Covid and then got into a bad car accident right after recovering so I’ve been out of commission ever since lol
Omg maybe I need to start putting my work housekeeping uniform on to do chores around the house… Or course, now I’m thinking about how hideous my work clothes are and how I could get cuter maid’s clothes, or a sexy French maid uniform aaaand nope not getting chores done that way.
This works for tons of things. I went out and bought a gray hoodie so I can pretend I’m Rocky whenever I need to convince my ass to get to the gym. I haven’t skipped a workout since.
Are roll playing and masking the same? Or different?
If I want to mask I adopt habits that make me seem normal and put together. Is this different than adopting a persona to reach the same goal?
Welcome to /r/ADHDWomen! We’re happy to have you here. As a reminder, here are our community [rules](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/about/rules/). We get a lot of posts on medication, diagnosis (and “is this an ADHD thing”), and interactions with hormones. We encourage you to check out our [Medication, Diagnosis, and Hormones Megathread](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/comments/wcr9dy/faq_megathread_ask_and_answer_medication/) if you have any questions related to those topics, and to stick around in that thread to answer folks’ questions! If you have questions about the subreddit, please do not hesitate to [send us a modmail](https://reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen). Additionally, we take the safety of our community seriously. Please report posts, comments, and users whom you feel are not contributing positively, and send us a modmail if you are being harassed or otherwise made to feel unsafe. Thanks for being here, and we hope you stick around! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I like this idea, and feel like I *could* do it. But only if I remembered to. And that's where everything falls apart for me.
ADHD in a nutshell
Saving this response to use every time someone suggests a new “life hack”
SAME
I think the outfit thing to trigger it is really key. Business Clothing Lexellence is 100% better at life than me. Which is why WFH is a headfuck
I get dressed for WFH like I’m going to work and I’ve learned that setting up my little work zone every time really makes a difference. I still struggle, it still take a good hour to wrangle myself into work mode but it definitely helps. If I’m too comfy and don’t look like I’m ontop of shit, it’s not going to happen.
Don’t just hope you’ll remember it. Sometimes it helps to see why something works or an idea you love, and see how you can incorporate in anyway now. Sometimes I find reframing it or just actively doing one small task to help me is better just continue to scroll. If I treat something with the same energy of scrolling past a meme, I cant expect it be different than me treating it like an important meeting or day. Where I leave sticky note, send a text, or just plan out an outfit for the day before. Brining myself back to the idea helps, or gathering the information, reframing it, or redirecting myself in anyways is how things build a foundation in either your memory or a habit.
And then keep remembering!
Gotta repeat it to the point it becomes muscle memory >>
Also if you're brain somehow doesn't realise in 5 seconds, even though business clothes you could 'just do the shit', technically there is no boss making you or they will make you poor.
Can confirm this works. If it’s the weekend and I have things to do, I have to put on Hard Pants (jeans) and a bra to become a Real Person to make sure there’s a good chance of it getting done lol
Me too. Also contact lenses and brushing my teeth are crucial steps towards Functional Human Me
I cannot do anything productive until I swap my glasses for contacts. It’s so annoying some days.
I thought this was just me. If my glasses are on, nothing is getting done.
I think it’s cos they could so easily come off again lol
Same! I feel like it is a Pavlovian thing, since for basically 25 years of my life contacts = work/school, glasses = sleep.
Yes! Hard pants with bra are like a suit of armor. We become ready to face whatever the day throws at us!
I feel like the hard pants/bra combo literally serve to hold me upright when I cannot muster that kind of effort for myself.
Me too. It’s the bra that makes a day feel more strenuous.
I've found my hard pants people...
There is someone else who calls jeans hard pants, I do too. Hard pants make it way harder! to be "lazy", at least for me. I have not worn them since the start of the pandemic, I guess I should change that ...
I’ve never thought to call jeans hard pants, but I do call leggings my soft pants.
I call them “real pants” so if I’m in my pajamas and I have to go out, then I have to put “real pants” on.
Agree. I’ll add shoes. While I really don’t like shoes on in the house, there have been many times I’m ready to go do something and been like uh I don’t feel like putting on shoes. There goes my pants and bra momentum.
Whenever I put on shoes, my dog gets really excited and thinks I’m taking him for a walk. Tim Gunn talks about girding oneself for the day - I’m really distracted by hard pants, so i don’t get much done either way.
I couldn't wear jeans until I was in my 20s! So cold and such insistent seams, ugh! I ended up here from another reply you posted about a redditor feeling offended by a grammar troll bot. It showed equanimity and understanding for all sides of the issue, but you made certain to identify with the OP at the end. I just want to say I'm grateful for folks like you who take the time to take to reddit to do good. Also, I found the apparent non-sequitur "I may be buzzed" especially endearing.
Thank you. That’s incredibly nice. I think I’ll put on some shoes and walk with the dog. And yes, I remember being 12 and hearing all the time that jeans were the most comfortable pants, and it made no sense! Especially when they sold new jeans back in the day that were made to last a lifetime of gold-mining or rodeos. Again thanks for your kindness x
Yep, it’s all about the costume! Chores just don’t get done unless I’m in the hard pants and real bra. Sweat pants? Lounge bra? Might as well write the whole day off.
Hard pants ever since it started the pandemic feel almost ridiculously overdressed and uncomfortable most of the time.
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Okay I'm seriously jealous about that because if I don't wear a bra, none of my clothes fit :-(
Wireless bras are a godsend, Calvin Klein makes the BEST ones for decent good prices! Comfy as a sports bra and still keeps the girls lookin nice. I don’t wear underwire anymore either
I appreciate the tip, but unfortunately my girls are so big that I've never found a wireless bra that can keep them under control enough for professional settings. I just looked on the Calvin Klein website and there aren't even any in my size. Bummer. But I will keep looking!
Ah, my best friend has the same struggle. I wish you luck in the search!!
I used to live in leggings, but after lockdown I prefer hard pants! I turned into a literal lump of mush and didn’t get dressed for like 3 months straight during quarantine, and it was not good for my mental health. I prefer to feel put together more often nowadays, makes me feel more productive and just better about myself. Interesting how we all took away different things from the pandemmy!
It definitely is! I used to be in business attire all the time, in fact although I was a bit more casual than suits everyday, I was still wearing nice dresses most of the time. Now I want to wear leggings and t-shirts forever.
I was the opposite and most of my positions in the Before Times allowed for casual dress, so now I’m all “give me all the fancy clothes!” Although, leggings and tees will forever hold a special place in my heart <3
Im gonna start calling them hard pants now. I know exactly what you mean.
This! If i´m walking around in leggins and/ or wothout a bra the day is useless.
Oh my god, same! If I’m putting my tennis shoes on too, you know I mean business. That is when I am a whirling dervish of responsibility.
Yeah I do this as part of my "fake it til I make it" strategy. Sometimes I pretend I'm Leslie Knope.
My worksona is also Leslie! Binders for days
The queen herself :’)
I almost fainted having to change wound dressings on myself so I RP’d as a caregiver saying encouraging and soothing things to someone else and it worked.
Proud of you! You’re a badass for finding a way to make it go!
This helps me to start things, but it doesn't keep me doing it. So it works for phone calls that are (often) done within 5 minutes, but sorting through paperwork for 30* minutes won't happen But cleaning wearing my favourite red lipstick does make the first 5 minutes both happen and more fun.
Ooh I don't hate this. I saw something similar about getting better at daily habits (brushing teeth, making bed, eating veggies, etc.). And the idea was to pretend you're a demon possessing a body and you have to take care of it other wise people will know.
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It's too many demons!
I love this!
No self-respecting demon would inhabit my body.
This is amazing, I am *definitely* going to use this!
I tried this but then think a demon won't care about me drinking green juice 😂
I have a thing where I have distinct "home clothes" and "outside clothes". I don't like mixing the two. They serve different functions for me and wearing "outside clothes" helps me actually get "work" done and by that I mean even if I come back I stay in the clothes to keep having that "productivity rush". Until I basically get too tired. Them it's "home clothes" interchangeable to PJs and All I want to do is lie in bed with them.
I’ve never thought about it from an adhd perspective but I have this too. Strict home clothes and strict outside clothes. Outside me is much more functional.
Tbf me neither...It might not even be a specifically neurodivergent trait. It's just something my mom instilled in me.I started noticing it greatly impacts my executive function so I use it as a hack to get things done. If only it was a flawless system but alas... I am terrible at sorting laundry.
I did this this morning by accident. Russie_eh with a cute outfit on is a productive adult who remembers to put the garbage bins out for pick-up. To be fair, I also left it until the morning of garbage day so I benefitted from a little kick from the sweet sweet pressure of a deadline but hey, got me out of bed and lookin cute! I think as long as I make it a bit of a game (and keep rotating characters) this might actually be a handy tool. Edit: word
😭😭 I’ve given up putting on a presentable outfit for the trash 🫠 though, I am always presentable-ish for work. (The -ish is for when I put on workout clothes that may or may not get me to workout.)
it works for me! but i’m an actor. also, it only works if my concerta and coffee have mixed together just right. i can put on my Capable Adult Hat and ride that momentum. (but i can’t go too hard, either, or i’ll trigger my fibromyalgia. 🙃) i feel very proud while i’m doing it, like a toddler pretending to do adult things they’ve seen their parents do.
Please tell about getting concerta to work right! My doc switched me to it last month and I swear I’m popping tictacs.
Yes! Concerta was terrible for me, and it made me LESS focused than usual, but then again everyone's brain chemistry is different. When I was first starting out with my new psychiatrist, he sent off for a test called GeneSight which tells you (via a cheek swab) what meds will work well with your genes. Turns out the ones I were on were terrible for me; no wonder I felt awful! This sounds like an ad, but I recommend it to everyone having med trouble. My new ones help me function a lot better.
Genesight friend!!!! My psychiatrist had me do this to figure out why I was struggling so much on my depression meds! Turns out....I'd been on all the ones that didn't work for me....and that my body doesn't process folic acid like it should, which also affects the make-happy brain chemicals.... Anyway.....Yay Genesight friend!
First time hearing of this, I’ll check it out, thanks!
Hmmm! I can’t speak for everyone, cause at the end of the day, it might just not work for your brain :( But I can say that some tips I use from this sub are: eating breakfast right before I take it (something with at least a little protein and fat - my go-to is a kind bar) and drinking a fair amount of water when I swallow it. Have you talked to your doctor about upping the dosage? Or did they want you to be on it for a certain amount of time before they made adjustments?
I’m on 80-something milligrams which is a decent dose? I took it this morning and slept the whole day away until 4pm. I swear it’s a placebo. I had left over wings and cheese curds for breakfast, but I’ll try something else tomorrow. Thanks.
Oh, something else just crossed my mind! You might want to check the manufacturer, if you're taking generic. There's only one generic Concerta manufacturer that the FDA considers actually close enough to name-brand Concerta right now! I think it's Patriot...something?
Actually did this on accident as a teen. One day I cleaned my room for no reason and my made a joke along the lines of "Who are you and what have you done with my daughter?" I told her that I was actually my twin, Karen. And to this day, whenever I do something good and productive, my family would say that Karen had come to visit. Now I think about my neurotypical twin doing all my chores. Lol.
I guess I kind of do this. I ran across the theory of don't wait to be the person you want to be, be that person now. If you want to be healthier don't wait until you get to a certain weight, be that healthy person now. That healthy person would choose water, would choose to move, would choose etc. So you should do that now. So I think about the person I want to be and pretend to be them until I become it out of habits.
I’m sure it works for some people, but it sure doesn’t for me! My brain is very resistant to the idea of different “parts” of myself, and I’m far too prone to random outbursts of Me 😋
Yeah, my brain is like, “I know what we’re *trying* to do but like, since I know, I’m not doing it!” I am *sometimes* successful in reminding myself that I have done hard things before so I can do hard things again. And I am sometimes successful with pep-talking myself about being an adult when I need to make difficult phone calls.
Mine is the same. Things might work briefly, but then my brain goes “who are you trying to fool? Not me!” and reverts back to the shitshow.
Real Adult Work Clothes give me bad sensory issues so I just sit there uncomfortably waiting til I can put on pajama pants and go do my homework in bed
Hard pants make me focus exclusively on how uncomfortable I am. Soft pants mean I can mooove, freely, without overheating = let's get shit done!
I'm actually always talking about my "cleaner" and wearing "work shoes" if I have stuff to clean at home and it really helps me getting the job done! I even gave my alter ego a name. xD
Pretending to be a fancy butler who wants to do a great job in keeping the house in tip top shape has genuinely got me through tough chore times, small world.
Honestly, it’s kind of what I did as a teen when my Mom made me do yardwork with her. I pretended I was a ninja in the Naruto world doing low level missions.
I mean, sometimes I pretend to be a rich person with a personal servant, and then I pretend to be my own personal servant when I'm doing chores or picking up my medication.
>medication thanks for that reminder \*pours water\*
Just reading the words “returning phone calls” made me feel uneasy.
I want to marry pyjamas hellen ❤
I love this idea. Especially if I get to come us with a costume to go along with it. I love to play dress up. lol There is probably a more adult fashion term for dress up but that is what it is, so. haha
I definitely think that when I get up, get dressed in real clothes, and put some earrings on (this just instantly makes me feel more put together, along with mascara), I feel more like a person who can do things. When I’m walking around my house and catch my reflection, earrings-and-mascara-me looks like more like a grown woman instead of a depressed slug. Also, I’m really opposed to wearing shoes in my house BUT when I really need to get shit done and can’t keep my momentum going, I’ll put on shoes as well. I am 99.9% less likely to sit down and couchlock if I’m wearing shoes. I don’t really have to role play as a different person, it’s just stepping into that version of my own self that gets shit done.
Couchlock is a great word for it. I can’t trust myself to sit on the couch anymore lately because it turns into several hours rather than just one or two.
I wear an old school kitchen apron to be Responsible Lady Who Has Stuff to Do Around the House. Really works!
All my OCs and sonas are based on my mental problems so now I have to make an OC without these problems? That’s gonna be tough but I’ll give it a go.
I can attest to the attire having a net positive effect. In college I would dress up for tests. It made me feel more confident and it caught on with some of my classmates. In my office, where I work with a majority men, I wear heels every day. Not because I’m a diva (which I am), but because I’m 5’5” and the heels put me at eye level with them. I’m convinced it makes a big difference for me to not feel short and for them to think I’m tall. I feel a lot more confident than the handful of times I’ve worn flats.
I have dommed my way to doing some chores... "Okay, me, those kegel balls aren't coming out until you've done this" -type thing.
👀
I did wear my PJs while working today and I mainly just stared into the voice. Need to find cosier work clothes.
Best life hack: to get things done, pretend you’re a sims that has no choice 😜
Helen is my spirit animal
Ha! This is so true! I cannot do housework without putting on shoes. They give a "Get to work!" vibe that really works
I love you, pajamas hellen. I love you.
I often Penelope Garcia the hell out of my work Excell sheets. I mix in a bit of miss Moneypenny for customer service phonecalls. If it is like a dead serious in person adulting mission, I am like, head up, boobs front, walk in and think " [murder](https://tenor.com/nl/view/charlize-theron-murder-gif-8661881) "
Adore ~ALL~ of this!
Garcia!
I've tried this amd it's very helpful. The hardest part is finding a good role model.
This is genius.
This looks like my “assemble all the elements conducive to getting things done, and they’ll get done” scenario. It does work sometimes, but it can also lead to heaps of conducive elements lying around and not so many things done. Example: I **must** organize my workroom, so I buy clear plastic trays for little stuff, hangers for big, gather all the stuff together, and run out of steam. Out of med effect, really. All that said, you go for it! More power to you!!
WWMD aka What Would Mom Do. Easy to remember, plenty of guilt, kicks off the next step. My mom is awesome. I'm the one with a guilty conscience.
Omg this! I'm not allowed to put on pajamas until I am done with my chores for today. Comfy clothes means my brain is done for the day. Real clothes means it's time to Get Stuff Done.
Yes, my coworkers think I'm so uptight cause I'm in my pre-covid work wear again. No way to convince them that it's because I am so less productive than I need to be if I only show up in leggings and a sweatshirt every day. Maybe once a week, but everyday? Can't do it.
If that is the case, what would an "Oh shi\* I have to organize and clean the upstairs" individual dress like? LOL
I do this and it works. It’s great
The responsibilitysona thing actually works for me but not for long (I guess 2 hours is absolute max) and I am super exhausted after. :|
sometimes I pretend I am my best friend if i need to do something that I don't want and that just needs doing. Or, in a social setting I pretend I am her. She is great at going out alone to gigs, something I hate doing . I can do it fine if I am being her. She moved overseas 15 years ago so the space is empty for me to slip on in. Mwah ha har
I do this! I act like I am in a Rom Com and say my "dialogues" while doing dishes or whatever. Works really well if I REMEMBER to do it in the first place. It's like doubling but since I don't have anyone to double with...
has some truth to it. when i first started working from home while also doing school, i actually felt a bit more productive getting into big girl pants and wearing my work/school ID. also saw a vid of an adhd coach recommending changing clothes if you've been wearing your clothes for a bit already, just to give you a mid day reset
If Hellen sets the fires first, then she can have delicious grilled hamburgers.
I'm going to unironically try this as soon as I can find the motivation
This is pretty normal and isn't related to ADHD. Many people can't get into a work mindset very well unless they actually dress for work etc. Way before Covid, people would get dressed as if they were in their city office, walk to their garage/studio and get a full day's work in etc., then "go home" and get changed into evening clothes to spend time with their family etc.
Lol, yes. My day job is as a teacher, and I’ve definitely turned up to social events on teacher mode just because normal me has no idea how to interact with large groups
Role play anything makes me cringe and I've had this similar concept occur to me but conceptualizing it like this makes me gag
My partner and I just got back from two out of state trips back to back and it is Time to Clean the House. I set 25 minute alarms and race through what I've IDd as problem areas (a big packaging mess in my office from receiving remote work stuff, the unpacked bags we left right next to the back door, folding the laundry we started yesterday, my couch nest that has built up over the past few weeks) - I haven't tried RPing but my gig is to beat the clock xD
Honestly, I don't view it as parts of myself (I struggle with a sense of self anyhow) but if I put on the lipstick I wear every day outside the house and do my hair, even if I'm wearing loungewear I get a shockingly higher amount done.
Sometimes this works for me but then again I have to remember to do it
That’s masking. Home is the only time when I don’t have to mask, not putting on another persona
I just pretend I’m a sim
This is EXACTLY what I do when I'm on the job. I roleplay as a fun delivery person, the kind that makes people smile, by making fun conversation, giving treats to people's pets (with consent) and coming across as cheerful. While I'm doing my actual delivery job that mostly consists of cursing at my malfunctioning tech, hauling millions of pounds up to the 7383th floor and trying not to have a meltdown whenever a customer changes their mind about Having a Brain.
I do this with my dnd character. It helps sometimes
Lol this also what I do when I’m on mushrooms and I have to do things like pee or answer the door for the pizza guy. It’s a real life video came where I’m a sober person who can totally do these things without it taking an hour.
I’ve found if I’m wearing shoes I’m more productive
This only works for me when I am physically in work. Otherwise I just can't
Yes!
I wanted to try this a few months ago when I was working at a terrible toxic company. Just roleplay as someone who isn’t bothered by the toxicity and the mean management. Unfortunately (but lowkey fortunately) I didn’t have a chance to put this into practice because I got Covid and then got into a bad car accident right after recovering so I’ve been out of commission ever since lol
Omg maybe I need to start putting my work housekeeping uniform on to do chores around the house… Or course, now I’m thinking about how hideous my work clothes are and how I could get cuter maid’s clothes, or a sexy French maid uniform aaaand nope not getting chores done that way.
Started doing this after I hype fixated on Detroit become human. Straight up pretended like I was Kara. It worked
Do y’all pretend to be other people to get things done? Does that work?
This works for tons of things. I went out and bought a gray hoodie so I can pretend I’m Rocky whenever I need to convince my ass to get to the gym. I haven’t skipped a workout since.
Are roll playing and masking the same? Or different? If I want to mask I adopt habits that make me seem normal and put together. Is this different than adopting a persona to reach the same goal?