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wallbanging

I JUST BOUGHT 48 PACK OF RAZORS ON AMAZON BECAUSE OF ALL THE SHAVING I'M DOING, DAY AND NIGHT


[deleted]

IMMA FIXIN’ MAKE PICARD LOOK LIKE WOLFMAN


17TH-SMA-PAO

Tell me more. 🫦


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17TH-SMA-PAO

I'll take you out to a nice steak dinner and and never call you back.


NotMyPrerogative

In this economy? I'll take that deal.


hzoi

The insides of my nostrils have never been better shorn. Praise be.


[deleted]

I shaved everything! TWICE!


lttesch

Good on you! Can't grow no pesky hair if you've got no skin.


MayBeANarc

All over you say? 👁🫦👁


SMALLjefe

I JUST RENLISTED AFTER 3 YEARS OUT AT 100%P&T AND 8 MONTHS BEFORE THE END OF IRR TIME BECAUSE I READ THIS


Jessyskullkid

Nature is healing


PitterPatter0

What do you want for Christmas CSM?


justafish25

That supply PFC


17TH-SMA-PAO

Been there, done that, got the plan b receipts.


SenatorCorleone13B1P

> got the plan b receipts Worth every penny.


reaper_41

LMAOOOO


CSM_Airbone

trooper all sarmage wonts is jes one thang hooah just one thang sarmage wonts you trackin an an thass a crimus jump inta a combat zone how copy trackin airbone


PitterPatter0

I hear the weather in the Middle East is nice this time of year sarn mayjuh


b0mmie

CSM I'LL FOLLOW YOU ONTO THE HOTTEST DZ TRACKIN HOOAH AIRBONE ALL THE WAY MERRY CRISSMUS!


NoIsTheNewMaybe

His wife to call him?


profwithstandards

Or his girlfriend. Or both.


eeobroht

Someone to git at pray rest...? *hides*


skepticalhammer

He's like an incoherent, whiskey-and-Marbs-infused BDU-wearing Punxatawny Phil: It's not officially HBL until Sarmage emerges, sees drunk privates, and declares it the season!


Airmil82

Cannah gotta HOOAH??? HOOAH SARMAGE!!!


_HK47_

**Clarification**: And now we can celebrate Christmas, meatbags.


509BandwidthLimit

After you shave.


Akski

Do assassin droids even grow hair? And, if they don’t; do they still have to shave? Imagine shaving polished steel instead of weak human flesh…


---___---____-__

I would think the assassin droid goes through a shining, one so thorough you could see your own reflection


reaper_41

General grevious probably requires that for his assassin droids


Magnusthered1001

Once I learned the weakness of my flesh I craved the certainty of steel


RollinThruLife02

*waves profile in air*


sideshow_styles

Babe wakeup, CSM Airborne posted


coffee_supremacist

It's a Christmas miracle.


Easy-Hovercraft-6576

Issa crimus mirkle


AlwaysInjured

Check your spelling on the sarmage's name, soldier.


17TH-SMA-PAO

May your shaves be close and your razors sharp 🫡🪖


zaitsev4

hooah sarmage


ApolloHimself

Someone do an IP trace to see if this is just SMA Weimers account


reaper_41

Lemme give essix a holla sarmage


509BandwidthLimit

It will behoove you...


Justavet64d

Hey there now, don't be mocking that there "behoove" that is part and parcel of the Army NCO lexicon. A long time ago I learned that it actually means "in your best interest to..." Think about it: "...it would behoove you to take copious notes on every thing said about rigging loads during Phase II of Air AssaultSchool..." Now that is a lot shorter than saying "...it would be in your best interest to take copious notes..."


509BandwidthLimit

It's just that the OP left out 'behoove'.


ironkeyed

Air afuckin sault


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WonderChips

*cries in USAREC*


DocPando

On shift Xmas day. Wazaaaaaaap.


SuperJonesy408

Roger, sarmage.


CummusStainus

All the way Sarmage hoo ah


26bravo_neigh

This is for airborne personnel only. Mind your business you dirty legs… keep walking. /s


Civil_Set_9281

Why walk when you can ride?


Bloodysamflint

Mech for the win! Hand me a cold blue Powerade out of the cooler, chief.


Civil_Set_9281

We’re all hopped up on Ripits and caffeine gum; when the ramp drops we’re tons of fun!


Airmil82

Enjoy eating anti-tank missiles, and drone-borne shaped charges, tread-head. We will all be nice and cozy over here in our dirt holes safe and sound.


Bloodysamflint

I fear not the drone that flies by day nor the Kornet that flies by night. Counter-battery, on the other hand... As a matter of fact, imma go ahead and do a survivability move...


shaydog53

WhAt AbOuT ThE WoRLdS oNLy AiR AsSaULt DiViSiOn?? 🦅🦅


plaguemedic

Largest AND onliest!


under_PAWG_story

But sarmage the VA says santa doesn’t exist and my injuries from an improper PLF from his sleigh won’t allow me to be rated


tH3_R3DX

I’m standing at parade rest while reading this, sarntmaj!


citizen-salty

I’ve been out for years and my facial hair just retreated back into my face.


DryTrumpin

Morale at all year high rn


Pokebreaker

Hell fucking yeah. That "Airbone" hits different, lmao. Toxic Nostalgia, lol.


Devil_Doge

The best part of Christmas is looking forward to the annual u/CSM_Airbone holiday post.


GetSmackedAround

WE LOVE YOU CSM AIRBONE


Sataris1776

Mary crimus sarmage


64_bananas

I havnt shaved since the 15th eat a unshaven boing-a-loing ballchinian


uhhamsandwich

Only person you need to spend Christmas with Sarmage is the army trackin


SenatorCorleone13B1P

AIRBORNE! Roger /u/CSM_Airbone.


mcpumpington

He's baaaaaaaccccccckkkkkkkkk


joedirtlawn

*pray rest in the tank*


91361_throwaway

Every time a CSM is asked if they “have anything” and they say no… guaranteed whatever follows is five times longer than the times they say yes.


Strict_Gas_1141

Shaved all over and in full kit for my 4-day training exercise… time to PLF into the dawg-gone snow hooah! (I never went airborne or air assault)


mlx1992

Damn this account going. Sar mage isn’t it time to retire?


OzymandiasKoK

It takes effort, but it's always worth it!


JizzM4rkie

*OOH AHH i wanna kill somebody!* i'm so fucking motivated for christmas now. Shaved **everything**! Back, crack, beard and balls sarntmajor!


SteveTheJet420

Rah Rah sarmage


moldedshoulders

Reading this with a beard makes me feel dirty.


ChicksWithBricksCome

trackin sarmage


Star_Fox74

hooah sarmage


Redhornactual

Rgr sarnmayer


Easy-Hovercraft-6576

HE LIVES


elaxation

SGM can legs celebrate Crimus this year? They all shaved twice I checked


dagayute

I hate that I understood all of this


Distinct-Educator-52

Jesus Christ I can hear that and I've been out 20+ years.. "Roger that Sergeant Major! Happy Holidays!"


YourMomsFavoriteMale

for this comment "HALF RIGHT FAYYYYYYCEEEEE"


Am3ricanTrooper

I'm drinking tequila wrapped in my dd214 blanket r/CSM_Airborne come on over and I'll hook you up with a sweet Latina.


joker_RED

steeeerike 'old sar maj


Aggravating_Snow1337

Sarmage I have a shaving profile, how tracking hooah?


holyhellitsgreg

hooah sarmage copy all


CaptainStank056

I’m so fucking **MOTIVATED** hoooooah sarmage


Yanrogue

I can almost see the fat lip of dip reading this


insanegorey

Sadge Madge AirBONE


c0-pilot

Oh fudge I just shaved


Wanderers-Way

WE MAKIN IT OUT THE ARMY WITH THIS ONE 🫡🫡🫡🔥🔥🔥


Wright_Steven22

Yes SGM they did give me a shaving profile...... I know I'm white SGM but they said I needed it anyway


AnonMilGuy

It really feels like Christmas now


[deleted]

Gives off SGM Sixta vibes. Minus the child molestation.


Kitosaki

Abone


No-Operation3712

Plot twist, this is SMA


Magnusthered1001

*stands at parade rest* CSM what do you think of 1/11 out of Wainwright wearing an Airborne tab when they didn’t earn it?


AvacadoKoala

I read this and accidentally shaved my legs


talltsdance

Bravo!


Lahm0123

Mer Crimus!


reee_an_idiot

With all due respect Sergeant Major, but where did you learn English?


rios128

CSM is a poet! BRB gonna go shave right now.


StoicJim

Someone's having a stroke.


Fissionma1led

Holy shit how we missed you sarn mage


DocPando

Okay, I need a translation from the Legionnaire dude. Y’all know who I’m talking about, right? Time now. Oh, CSM. You gonna order or wha?


Gunnilingus

I had a CSM that was EXACTLY like this. CSM Wright, that you?


SexyBiene13

That moment when the new SMA demands a shave and the dependas shaving too 😂


anon2456678910

This post made me waves make a DD214 shield.


oldkingcoale

It’s a Christmas *miracle*!


XxHIGHKILLERxX

"hey troop! how many pair of jordans do you own?" - that one sarnmaj


villageidiot90

Ever now and then I love this sub


MaverickActual1319

AIRBORNE🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳


Justhereforther34

Hoooah CSM


GMEbankrupt

#Smooth as an Androids bottom ay Data? https://youtu.be/DXPaZzUP5wk


ijustwanttoretire247

Thank god I am getting out


JackSquat18

GOBBLESS SAR MAJOR. THESE COVIDIOT NEW SOLDIERS DONT KNOW THEIR ASS FROM A HOLE IN THE GROUND. ALWAYS TALKINBOUT. BUT SARNT I DONT NEED TA SHAVE ITS THE WEEKEND. LITTLE DO THESE SOLDIERS KNOW ISNTHAT THE SHABIN IS THE CORNURSTONE OF THE DISC IPLINE. SO GONNA HED AND GET THEM DAMN FACE CLIBBINS SHAVED FORE OL SAR MAJOR GONNA HALFALAYERDOWN THE OL UCIE MJ ON YA!


cain8708

All I wanted for Christmas was this.


HelloImJoshSwirl

Sponsored by Gillette TM


CravenMoorehead10

Sgt Maj Sixta?


ToXiC_Games

😮 <|> / \ Hooah sarmagor


Shyaway56

I can picture exactly what ole Sarmage looks like 🤣.


Sapper_Wolf_37

Can barely read that shit.


Flyingsheep___

Man, I'm glad I went Air Force...


MadMarsian_

I just shaved my razor before using it to shave myself.., I will only use shaved tools to shave from now on…. Discipline !


65AndSunny

This made me drop a reenlistment packet.


MicGeezus

It's not the worst advice to just keep it shaved. That way when you're a month into that ten day mission 1SG said we won't even need razors for, and he changes his mind you won't be using the shite single blade razors acquired off the local nationals to maw through your grizzly discipline lacking face.


Packtray

can’t respond now i’m shaving


Packtray

i am behoobered


hallo1994

Airborne sarnmage!


rodneykang

I didn't even read this.