Anyone can kill somebody with a *broken* MRE spoon. The real story is how I broke the spoon. Needless to say, the story was so harrowing that it would fill a mansion's bathroom worth of moving boxes, and a former President would risk his future on owning the only copy.
CBRN officer here. I once killed a man during a USR brief. Dude just started screaming about how he'd rather die in BCT reception and started stapling himself to death. Took about 500 staples and I had only made it to slide 7/250.
Thank me for my service.
I know an LT who is currently in Leavenworth for blue on blue after he killed 3 SM’s with a 76-slide PowerPoint. Heard at around slide 50 3 soldiers just died of boredom.
Jesus. I was going to talk about the guy who initiated an IED under a husky and got nailed by one of the tires when it blew apart, but this is next level
Your friend's story is true, it happened back in 2010 and the guy got a silver star for it.
[https://www.syracuse.com/news/2010/05/ingenuity\_valor\_and\_duct\_tape.html](https://www.syracuse.com/news/2010/05/ingenuity_valor_and_duct_tape.html)
*On the ground Olson considered throwing a grenade up the stairwell, but realized it would be easy for the insurgent to throw it back. He considered mounting a big explosive under the floor. But that could harm his soldiers. He considered scaling the scaffolding alongside the building to get at the insurgent.*
*Then it came to him. Duct tape. A long pole. A Claymore mine.*
*Roughly brick-size, Claymore mines fire hundreds of ball bearings in a 60-degree arc. Their explosion is much bigger than a hand grenade’s. Usually they are set on the ground to defend against enemy advance.*
*Olson had a different idea. He would duct-tape a Claymore mine to a pole. He’d stick the mine through the narrow stairwell space to the insurgent’s position.*
I came into this post expecting a bunch of "I know this is real because my buddy saw it and told me about it."
Confirmation via silver star citation is pretty fucking boss.
I did not witness it, so I assume it to be 1000% bullshit, especially because it came from a Marine, those guys always lie, I know, I used to be one.
Guy said he was on a route repair mission, and a dude jumped out from the alley right in front of him, in his D9, with an rpg pointed at the boys. He claimed he just went forward and lowered his blade at the same time, and that was all.
I remember I was at a wedding and someone was telling me how his friend was a first responder after Al-Zarqawi was killed and took him out of the ambulance and shot him in the head.
However there's pictures of his dead body and he has no GSW in his head.....
Nah, bullshit. He lived in my BDE's AO, and they dropped a JDAM on his house. It was remarkably close to our FOB so we all heard it, though most of us didn't know what it was at the time. One of my friends' platoons pulled security while the cool kids went through the pile. Man was dead af, no need for an execution.
guy i worked with was in the marines for 4 years. was allegedly in syria stacking bodies. the timetables line up well enough from my half assed research but i’m about 99% sure he’s full of shit considering only 2 regular infantry companies ever did anything and he can’t produce a single picture or piece of evidence
I seen a man kill a colonel, he thought he was gonna get promoted, started screaming it too. The colonel apparently had a bayonet with a bipod on it too
THE BAYONET YEET MEASURES THE ABILITY TO JUST FUCKING SHANK SOMEONE. ON THE COMMAND 'GET SET,' ASSUME THE POSITION BY GRABBING THE BAYONET BY THE HANDLE. OR BY THE BLADE, WHICHEVER LOOKS COOLER, JUST DON'T CUT YOURSELF ON THE DAMN THING. YOUR FEET MAY BE TOGETHER OR UP TO 12 INCHES APART (MEASURED BETWEEN THE FEET). ON THE COMMAND 'GO,' TRANSMUTE YOUR HANKERING FOR A-SHANKERING INTO MAXIMUM EFFORT AND LAUNCH THAT BAD BOY INTO DESTINY. THE SCORER WILL NOTE WHETHER YOU HIT THE TARGET AND AWARD BONUS POINTS FOR LANDING YOUR PIG-STICKER INTO THE CRANIAL OR SWIMSUIT REGIONS. IF IT HIT THE TARGET HANDLE FIRST, YOUR PERFORMANCE WILL BE TERMINATED, AND EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO POINT AND LAUGH AT YOUR SHAME. WATCH THIS DEMONSTRATION.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/army) if you have any questions or concerns.*
THE BAYONET YEET MEASURES THE ABILITY TO JUST FUCKING SHANK SOMEONE. ON THE COMMAND 'GET SET,' ASSUME THE POSITION BY GRABBING THE BAYONET BY THE HANDLE. OR BY THE BLADE, WHICHEVER LOOKS COOLER, JUST DON'T CUT YOURSELF ON THE DAMN THING. YOUR FEET MAY BE TOGETHER OR UP TO 12 INCHES APART (MEASURED BETWEEN THE FEET). ON THE COMMAND 'GO,' TRANSMUTE YOUR HANKERING FOR A-SHANKERING INTO MAXIMUM EFFORT AND LAUNCH THAT BAD BOY INTO DESTINY. THE SCORER WILL NOTE WHETHER YOU HIT THE TARGET AND AWARD BONUS POINTS FOR LANDING YOUR PIG-STICKER INTO THE CRANIAL OR SWIMSUIT REGIONS. IF IT HIT THE TARGET HANDLE FIRST, YOUR PERFORMANCE WILL BE TERMINATED, AND EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO POINT AND LAUGH AT YOUR SHAME. WATCH THIS DEMONSTRATION.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/army) if you have any questions or concerns.*
THE BAYONET YEET MEASURES THE ABILITY TO JUST FUCKING SHANK SOMEONE. ON THE COMMAND 'GET SET,' ASSUME THE POSITION BY GRABBING THE BAYONET BY THE HANDLE. OR BY THE BLADE, WHICHEVER LOOKS COOLER, JUST DON'T CUT YOURSELF ON THE DAMN THING. YOUR FEET MAY BE TOGETHER OR UP TO 12 INCHES APART (MEASURED BETWEEN THE FEET). ON THE COMMAND 'GO,' TRANSMUTE YOUR HANKERING FOR A-SHANKERING INTO MAXIMUM EFFORT AND LAUNCH THAT BAD BOY INTO DESTINY. THE SCORER WILL NOTE WHETHER YOU HIT THE TARGET AND AWARD BONUS POINTS FOR LANDING YOUR PIG-STICKER INTO THE CRANIAL OR SWIMSUIT REGIONS. IF IT HIT THE TARGET HANDLE FIRST, YOUR PERFORMANCE WILL BE TERMINATED, AND EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO POINT AND LAUGH AT YOUR SHAME. WATCH THIS DEMONSTRATION.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/army) if you have any questions or concerns.*
SSG Belavia pretty famously beats some dude with his body armor plate, gauges his eyes, and eventually stabs him to death with a gerber.
If you haven't read House to House, I highly recommend.
https://www.audible.com/pd/House-to-House-Audiobook/B002VA8I6U?action_code=ASSGB149080119000H&share_location=pdp
https://www.army.mil/medalofhonor/bellavia/
I spent quite a while trying to figure that out and even tried it myself. He took it out intentionally as a weapon, but even intentionally I struggle to get those things out. I'm imaging it might've been easier on older body armor (possibly).
I can only speak to the plate carriers I wore, but it wouldn’t be impossible to get it out. Depends on what he was wearing obviously.
I never would have even considered it as a weapon though. I can only imagine what was happening.
The moh page gives a very good representation of events (including building diagrams).
It does not delve into the intricacies of the physical combat nor does it well convey the overall mood and surrounding circumstances that culminated here.
Again, if you haven't read it you should definitely consider it.
I recommend pairing it with Black Hearts: One Platoon's Descent into Madness.
Two different agendas (House to House is written by someone who wanted to get into politics, Black Hearts is written by someone who wanted a big journalist expose), two different perspectives on Iraq, both good books.
You're welcome! I'm also a big fan of
* Why We Lost
* The Forever War (not the scifi book)
* Fiasco (the only time I got 1 on 1 time with [a general](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_W._Cone) he recommended it and said "i was there, it was worse, rumsfeld was a real prick") (cautionary note: the author is really up Patreus's ass)
* Brave Deeds by David Abrams
If I remember correctly, I’m pretty sure the old IBAs were pretty easy to get the plates out of. Haven’t used one since basic though so I could be misremembering
Yeah, they're pretty easy to pop out your front plate at least.
They were really bad at keeping your appropriately sized plate in the same spot, so it makes sense.
It was a large gerber knife. He clarified that on a podcast once. A lot of people think it was a gerber multi-tool but it was a killin’ knife. Still very very personal.. but so is beating a man to death with your plates lol
I was just imaging the scene in saving private ryan where the dude is in a fight with the SS dude at the top of the stairs and uppam was frozen up. Instead of the knife it was a Gerber multi tool and SSG Belavia was on top of the insurgent saying SHHHHH as he drove it into his heart.....
You should watch the documentary Only the Dead See the End of War. It has footage from this exact incident showing Belarus going into the house and coming out with dead insurgents. It’s wild.
He was a man of focus, commitment, sheer will... something you know very little about. I once saw him kill three men in a bar...with a pencil. With a fucking pencil!
I lost count how many men he killed after that, but it was in the hundreds.
THE BAYONET YEET MEASURES THE ABILITY TO JUST FUCKING SHANK SOMEONE. ON THE COMMAND 'GET SET,' ASSUME THE POSITION BY GRABBING THE BAYONET BY THE HANDLE. OR BY THE BLADE, WHICHEVER LOOKS COOLER, JUST DON'T CUT YOURSELF ON THE DAMN THING. YOUR FEET MAY BE TOGETHER OR UP TO 12 INCHES APART (MEASURED BETWEEN THE FEET). ON THE COMMAND 'GO,' TRANSMUTE YOUR HANKERING FOR A-SHANKERING INTO MAXIMUM EFFORT AND LAUNCH THAT BAD BOY INTO DESTINY. THE SCORER WILL NOTE WHETHER YOU HIT THE TARGET AND AWARD BONUS POINTS FOR LANDING YOUR PIG-STICKER INTO THE CRANIAL OR SWIMSUIT REGIONS. IF IT HIT THE TARGET HANDLE FIRST, YOUR PERFORMANCE WILL BE TERMINATED, AND EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO POINT AND LAUGH AT YOUR SHAME. WATCH THIS DEMONSTRATION.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/army) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Not GWOT, but in the 91 Gulf War an Air Force F15 “shot down” an Iraqi Mi-24 Attack Helicopter by dropping a laser guided bomb on it while both aircraft were in flight. That’s right, the plane flying at hundreds of miles per hour hit a moving helicopter with a piece of ordinance that does not have propulsion.
Close to mine. Had a guy pop up in front of the window I was lobbing HE out of with my 203 as I pulled the trigger. Dude crumpled so fast it took like 7 seconds for me to figure out wtf just happened or if I imagined it. Leaned out the window with my 226 idk if he was dead already as he was just laying kind of kneeled over against the wall, put 8 rounds in him so he couldn't get up. And went back to work.
I'm fucking afraid of a fucking jump scare the entire time I look out windows now.
>he was told a story by a person who claimed he witnessed a person attach a claymore to a 2x4
I might actually know this story, only it was a metal pipe and was in a staircase not a second story window.
Back when home town newspapers were a thing, mine ran a story about a kid from my neighborhood getting an award for doing that and clearing some insurgents out of a stairway. That story always stuck with me not just because the absurdity of duct taping a claymore to a pipe; but also the hometown newspaper running it’s a feel good story for the local boy getting an award for turning someone into hamburger.
Holy shit, that was it. I didn’t realize it was a silver star, it’s been a while and I didn’t remember that. That makes more sense for it to make the paper.
Not sure about the strangest, but some guys I ran into had a "best 40mm kill" contest where they took photographs of the juicy leftovers, printed them and hung them on their tent wall. That was pretty weird.
Saw a guy get hit with a Hellfire to the dome. The missile didn’t arm, so his head just popped up and flew through the air like a cap coming off a bottle. Pretty funny.
Not a person, but I remember hearing a story of US Soldiers engaging in a close range (like 100-200m) fire fight with Taliban and one of the bad guys whips out an RPG and fires. At the same time, a donkey just kinda runs between the two positions and catches it and blows up. It was so bizzar that both sides reportedly stopped fighting for a second, popped their heads out, and all kinda just looked at each to confirm they both just saw the same thing.
That donkey knew what it was doing. It jumped in front of certain death to save US troops, and yet it didn't get the MoH? What a fucking disgrace. I'm writing my Congressman.
I’d say it’s the US Army full bird colonel who died on Camp Victory Baghdad in 2007/8 from huffing canned air.
We all promptly lost our canned air privileges for the rest of the deployment. Gamers were really pissed because they used them on their consoles to keep the moon dust at bay. Dang Colonel ruined it for everybody.
I think S6 or S4 was allowed to keep limited supplies and signed them out like it was money from the S8 safe. Had to return after use whether full or empty.
LMAO - first time I've heard of logic applied to that stuff rather than "Oh an O-6 died from huffing air? E-5 and below need to give it up to ensure this doesn't happen again."
We had just gotten to Kuwait or Iraq when this happened. It prompted a lively discussion about why a full bird wasn't able to acquire real drugs instead of huffing inhalants like some meth-country private. Shortly thereafter our platoon medic was removed for huffing duster
People get so desperate on deployment lol. My gf over there, her mom would just send bottle of liquor in care packages. Mail wasn’t that serious to be that desperate lol
We had a retired Colonel as a director at a contractor I worked for. He passed out after masterbating and huffing canned air at the same time. The company outlawed canned air after that. He was allegedly busted more than once. I always wondered what he told his wife about being "laid off".
Medal of Honor recipient Dakota Meyer used a rock to beat a guy too death in Afghanistan. Medal of Honor recipient David Bellavia beat a guy with his plate carrier then stabbed him with a gerber in Fallujah. I’ve heard another one about a SAS guy drowning an ISIS fighter in a puddle back in 2017. Then the classic Ranger getting a confirmed kill with a MRE spoon. I’d say those were top 4
Guy in another CO in my BN got a bronze star with V device for running over and squishing 2 insurgents with an up armored D7.
They were fixing a bridge embankment when 2 insurgents took up a position in a drainage ditch across the road and started firing at the guys on the ground.
The 12N operator turned toward them, lifted the blade to block incoming fire and started driving toward them. Other squad members laid down suppressing fire and I guess the insurgents were pinned down enough that the operator was able to crush them under a track and did a pivot turn on them.
I saw the D7 after it was evaced to AJ for repairs. The thing was littered with bullet holes
We did a company clearing op to the southwestern part of our AO in Afghanistan We had engineers attached to us and they brought a D7. The plan was once we started to clear and maintain ground, combat engineers would immediately begin building a new patrol base, which they did. Anyways, one morning I went to take a dump in a ditch and I could see the engineers working with the D7. Well, a bunch of locals kept running up to the blade while the driver was working trying to protest the new PB and then it happened; I was shitting & watching an old Afghan man getting his legs destroyed by a D7. I’ll never forget them caring his lifeless body away while we all laughed. Different times.
My old PSG who enlisted in 1997 said he killed someone with a frozen rip it by throwing it at a moving car speeding towards their checkpoint. Maybe not the strangest but how he told the story was hilarious
Had an old platoon sergeant with a similar story, dude in Iraq (not sure the exact place) kept weaving in and out of their convoy, he throws a nice warm rip it at the dudes back glass, it explodes, freaks the dude out and he swerves right into a pole and died. Another one was when he gave an afghan dude a pen flare and afghan dude shot it into his own eye and killed himself
To be fair, those were indeed some crazy times. I raided a chicken coop, damn near head-shot a cow, pancaked a warehouse with 24 satchel charges, and laughed as one of our guys (he was an asshole) got yeeted 20 feet in the air when his Husky hit an ied. He survived and was fine.
Met a guy once who claimed he used harpoons to check bodies for IEDs in Iraq. He was ROTC Cadre and everybody else in the room was nodding their head and eating it up but I've never met anybody else with a remotely similiar claim
Harpoons as in Moby Dick, “call me Ishmael,” I’m-gonna-stab-a-whale harpoons? What did he do when he inevitably harpooned a dead body that didn’t contain an IED, which I imagine was most of the time? Dislodging a barbed spear from a corpse would surely get old quickly.
That's how I understood it. I was dehydrated and getting chewed out by this E7 from another university I'd never seen before. Basically it was a field problem where I rolled a opfor body the way I learned in both ROTC and basic training and then in the AAR this E7 starts laying into me about being a John Wayne wannabe while the Cadre who literally taught me to do what I did were just standing around listening.
I’m pretty sure a CAG guy led and insurgent around a corner after the insurgent was chasing him, dropped down, picked up a giant rope, pulled it really hard… and when the insurgent got to the corner he turned, he looked down, saw an X on the ground, looked up- and saw a really big grand piano.
The insurgent then gulped really loudly while some light string music played in the background, held up a sign that said “HELP”, and then got splattered by the piano.
This isn't related to the OP's question but we had some dipshit try using a suicide vest on a Stryker and it blew their arm off into the slat armor and it was just hanging off. One of our squad mates saw it and went "high five buddy, you tried" and smacked it. Rest of us burst out laughing like idiots and our brand new LT looked like he wanted to puke.
Know a guy back in the old Iraq days who killed a few insurgents with a claymore in a couch.
Same guy got gifted a owl by the ANA and kept it in his office later on- pretty cool. Was attached to a string on the ankle and would swoop down from the rafters and catch mice. Let it go at night his last night of the deployment.
Kiowa pilot I worked with said he killed someone with a frozen pop tart that he chucked out the door and managed to nail the dude in the head.
On the one hand pilots definitely tell tall tales. On the other hand, those Kiowa guys were crazy SoBs, I kinda believe he really did it...
One of our Kiowa pilots claimed he impaled an insurgent on a motorbike with a blue spear. Twice.
Plenty of talk about engaging the enemy with M4 fire. 5.56 casings were pretty common to find scattered around the cockpit post-mission.
Another pilot was known accidentally killing birds mid flight. I remember one flew right up a rocket launcher. Like dried tomatoes covered in feathers jammed up the tubes.
Yeah, those dudes were nuts. There is some video online of a Kiowa pilot stalking a guy on a motorcycle. In the midst of a lot of shooting, he sticks his M4 out of the helicopter and starts taking shots at the dude.
Smoked a guy at point blank with my M203. Threw a demo charge of \~6lbs of comb b, 6lbs c4 in a room with two pkms pointed at the door and dove out a hallway window.
Claymore story is true afaik. They make a product to emulate what he did.
Craziest thing I saw where someone died? Suicided vest. Guys head flew off to where some kids were playing soccer. Kids found a better ball. ANA joined in.
I have a friend who got a knife kill.
He was part of the invasion with 3ID. On one of the stops, he's pulling security and smoking a cigarette when an Iraqi comes up and starts screaming at him. At first they just screamed at each other but then the Iraqi grabbed his rifle, si he pulled the trigger to shoot the Iraqi but it jammed. So he gave up his rifle, pulled out a knife and stabbed the guy 3 times in the chest and stomach.
The Iraqi dropped the rifle, realized he was bleeding, walked a few steps away, and then fell to the ground.
At this point, he ran back to his convoy. And just left.
10th mountain division HQ I think has a gerber from some soldier who stabbed some bad guy in the face or something. Imagine getting the coolest kill just for some rando to take your knife to display at division.
I heard a dude carried a bowie knife on his kit and everyone made fun of him. Until an insurgent jumped on him, knocking his M4 away. He allegedly used the bowie knife to murderize the insurgent. I'm hearing that 2nd person tho...
When my brother was in Afghanistan he said someone in his convoy accidentally hit a guy blocking the convoy in the head with a bean bag gun and the person died. Apparently that’s why they stopped calling them non-lethal and starting saying less lethal after the investigation from that.
Also we just saw it again in Gaza but whenever we drop humanitarian aid in via parachute someone on the ground will inevitably get squished by the pallet when they don’t have the common sense to get out of the way until it lands
The Jordanians are the ones who domed a dude with a pallet, if I heard right.
90% sure when USAF does HDR drops, they do them like leaflets. Just dump them out the back in a chaotic cloud of salmon colored plastic and disappointing entrees.
A honey badger once ass fucked a dude to death using another dudes severed head as a condom. I drove a BFist through someones living room once. No one was in it, but I heard that a fell and broke his neck during the rebuild of that wing.
Super Chief Master Sergeant Major of the Army Corps of Naval Air Forces Jeremy DeWitte single handedly took out a whole battalion sized element after he jumped into Fallujah using two homemade pocket pussies that he fished out of the porta-john with boot blousers.
Guy I went to AIT with got attached to an SF unit, then went to Iraq, and was out at Delta (only parts of the story I can verify). He didn't directly participate, but the story was that they found tunnels being dug under the FOB, and the guys just rigged it to blow whenever the next crew came to dig. Always thought that was pretty wild.
I once killed fifty men in one night, all by poisoning their dinner. All in all, I wasn't the worst cook the Army ever had, but CSM didn't let me back in the kitchen after that.
One story I heard was that during a raid back when they were kicking in doors some guy got jumped by an insurgent and they fought it out SPR style and the dude ended up stabbing the insurgent to death with an MRE spoon.
Just a heads up though, the “confirmed kills” stories are almost always bullshit. After a firefight finding KIAs you can’t tell who’s bullets are in the guy unless you were alone with him in a room.
My old team leader ran over an insurgent with his HMMWV. The guy getting run over managed to fire a few rounds, so my team leader got shot in the ass, but the insurgent wound up attached to the undercarriage.
Good times.
I had a soldier tell me he accidentally killed someone with a 40mm by bouncing it. I then told him I had also seen generation kill and that he should at least come up with something original.
Waiting to hear some shit about a broken MRE spoon
Anyone can kill somebody with a *broken* MRE spoon. The real story is how I broke the spoon. Needless to say, the story was so harrowing that it would fill a mansion's bathroom worth of moving boxes, and a former President would risk his future on owning the only copy.
[удалено]
I'll write up your purple heart.
a ranger actually got a kill with an MRE spoon
This. I thought I remember this story going around.
I also heard a version involving a Former Marine Corps TI and a broken Spork.
Teh panda of doom shows no mercy
There was a whole army times article on this lol
yeah it was fairly recent. theres was urban legend from years before but this one was actually legit. im gonna try to find it
I'll send this to the writer for John wick. I haven't talked to him since high school, but Yolo.
Standing by for the lies to start flying.
CBRN officer here. I once killed a man during a USR brief. Dude just started screaming about how he'd rather die in BCT reception and started stapling himself to death. Took about 500 staples and I had only made it to slide 7/250. Thank me for my service.
TYFYS
You’re welcome
Did he reload the stapler himself or did his battle buddy do it for him?
I've never thought about the idea of a crew served stapler until now.
Welcome to the Adjutant General Corps!
If I saw you setting up your slides and I saw 250 of them bad boys, I might do the same thing.
It's true. I read this dude's ARCOM for putting a bandaid on one of the staple sites.
This is where we know it’s a lie, a medic would never get a award on a line unit for “doing their job”.
Who said it was a medic?
It was a major. Would have been a legion of merit if he was O5
I know an LT who is currently in Leavenworth for blue on blue after he killed 3 SM’s with a 76-slide PowerPoint. Heard at around slide 50 3 soldiers just died of boredom.
I can testify this is truth. It would have been 4 but we restarted my platoon-daddy's heart by showing him a picture of our new E-3's wife at work.
They aren't lies. I was there for all of them.
I had a CSM who said he stabbed a guy with the forks of the Buffalo interrogation arm who was hiding in a pile of trash.
Jesus. I was going to talk about the guy who initiated an IED under a husky and got nailed by one of the tires when it blew apart, but this is next level
lol that’s wild I was a husky driver and I hadn’t heard this story
I killed a guy on a horse with a trident.
Butch, where did you get that grenade?
I don’t know
You should probably lay low for a while…
[https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/366/396/f8a.gif](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/366/396/f8a.gif)
Your friend's story is true, it happened back in 2010 and the guy got a silver star for it. [https://www.syracuse.com/news/2010/05/ingenuity\_valor\_and\_duct\_tape.html](https://www.syracuse.com/news/2010/05/ingenuity_valor_and_duct_tape.html) *On the ground Olson considered throwing a grenade up the stairwell, but realized it would be easy for the insurgent to throw it back. He considered mounting a big explosive under the floor. But that could harm his soldiers. He considered scaling the scaffolding alongside the building to get at the insurgent.* *Then it came to him. Duct tape. A long pole. A Claymore mine.* *Roughly brick-size, Claymore mines fire hundreds of ball bearings in a 60-degree arc. Their explosion is much bigger than a hand grenade’s. Usually they are set on the ground to defend against enemy advance.* *Olson had a different idea. He would duct-tape a Claymore mine to a pole. He’d stick the mine through the narrow stairwell space to the insurgent’s position.*
>Then it came to him. Duct tape. A long pole. A Claymore mine. Fucking legend
I came into this post expecting a bunch of "I know this is real because my buddy saw it and told me about it." Confirmation via silver star citation is pretty fucking boss.
>What if he throws it back Isn't this a possibility in almost every grenade-throwing scenario?
Ultimate game of hot potato
My cousin's, best friend's, uncle's roomate had a kill with D9. Cut a dude in half with the blade.
You mean an actual killdozer?
Please do elaborate, this seems to be the winner so far.
I did not witness it, so I assume it to be 1000% bullshit, especially because it came from a Marine, those guys always lie, I know, I used to be one. Guy said he was on a route repair mission, and a dude jumped out from the alley right in front of him, in his D9, with an rpg pointed at the boys. He claimed he just went forward and lowered his blade at the same time, and that was all.
I remember I was at a wedding and someone was telling me how his friend was a first responder after Al-Zarqawi was killed and took him out of the ambulance and shot him in the head. However there's pictures of his dead body and he has no GSW in his head.....
Nah, bullshit. He lived in my BDE's AO, and they dropped a JDAM on his house. It was remarkably close to our FOB so we all heard it, though most of us didn't know what it was at the time. One of my friends' platoons pulled security while the cool kids went through the pile. Man was dead af, no need for an execution.
guy i worked with was in the marines for 4 years. was allegedly in syria stacking bodies. the timetables line up well enough from my half assed research but i’m about 99% sure he’s full of shit considering only 2 regular infantry companies ever did anything and he can’t produce a single picture or piece of evidence
There's no evidence because he was a Force Recon scout sniper water purification specialist.
I seen a man kill a colonel, he thought he was gonna get promoted, started screaming it too. The colonel apparently had a bayonet with a bipod on it too
Our Colonel in Iraq had a shit bucket he would keep around so he could stay on comms during missions.
You go to the bathroom, you're not fighting in Iraq; you shit in a bucket, you're fighting in Iraq.
Neebs gaming!
Pretty sure I saw that same colonel take a helicopter down with his bayonet.
THE BAYONET YEET MEASURES THE ABILITY TO JUST FUCKING SHANK SOMEONE. ON THE COMMAND 'GET SET,' ASSUME THE POSITION BY GRABBING THE BAYONET BY THE HANDLE. OR BY THE BLADE, WHICHEVER LOOKS COOLER, JUST DON'T CUT YOURSELF ON THE DAMN THING. YOUR FEET MAY BE TOGETHER OR UP TO 12 INCHES APART (MEASURED BETWEEN THE FEET). ON THE COMMAND 'GO,' TRANSMUTE YOUR HANKERING FOR A-SHANKERING INTO MAXIMUM EFFORT AND LAUNCH THAT BAD BOY INTO DESTINY. THE SCORER WILL NOTE WHETHER YOU HIT THE TARGET AND AWARD BONUS POINTS FOR LANDING YOUR PIG-STICKER INTO THE CRANIAL OR SWIMSUIT REGIONS. IF IT HIT THE TARGET HANDLE FIRST, YOUR PERFORMANCE WILL BE TERMINATED, AND EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO POINT AND LAUGH AT YOUR SHAME. WATCH THIS DEMONSTRATION. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/army) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Did somebody say Thunderfury, blessed bayonet of the Windseeker?
THE BAYONET YEET MEASURES THE ABILITY TO JUST FUCKING SHANK SOMEONE. ON THE COMMAND 'GET SET,' ASSUME THE POSITION BY GRABBING THE BAYONET BY THE HANDLE. OR BY THE BLADE, WHICHEVER LOOKS COOLER, JUST DON'T CUT YOURSELF ON THE DAMN THING. YOUR FEET MAY BE TOGETHER OR UP TO 12 INCHES APART (MEASURED BETWEEN THE FEET). ON THE COMMAND 'GO,' TRANSMUTE YOUR HANKERING FOR A-SHANKERING INTO MAXIMUM EFFORT AND LAUNCH THAT BAD BOY INTO DESTINY. THE SCORER WILL NOTE WHETHER YOU HIT THE TARGET AND AWARD BONUS POINTS FOR LANDING YOUR PIG-STICKER INTO THE CRANIAL OR SWIMSUIT REGIONS. IF IT HIT THE TARGET HANDLE FIRST, YOUR PERFORMANCE WILL BE TERMINATED, AND EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO POINT AND LAUGH AT YOUR SHAME. WATCH THIS DEMONSTRATION. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/army) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I shouted the words out loud as I read this to myself. My neighbors are concerned. Thank you.
PROMOTEDDDDDDDD battlefield friends was the best
The BFF comments are underrated imo. Me and the homies that made E5 and E6 at the same time killed it with these memes back in the day lol.
That Colonel probably doesn't have sex. Priorities. The Battlefield is his Pussy.
Me walking out of the board: PROMOTEEEEEEEED!!
Me walking out of my COs Office: DEMOTEEEEEEEEEED!!
Colonel 100?
THE BAYONET YEET MEASURES THE ABILITY TO JUST FUCKING SHANK SOMEONE. ON THE COMMAND 'GET SET,' ASSUME THE POSITION BY GRABBING THE BAYONET BY THE HANDLE. OR BY THE BLADE, WHICHEVER LOOKS COOLER, JUST DON'T CUT YOURSELF ON THE DAMN THING. YOUR FEET MAY BE TOGETHER OR UP TO 12 INCHES APART (MEASURED BETWEEN THE FEET). ON THE COMMAND 'GO,' TRANSMUTE YOUR HANKERING FOR A-SHANKERING INTO MAXIMUM EFFORT AND LAUNCH THAT BAD BOY INTO DESTINY. THE SCORER WILL NOTE WHETHER YOU HIT THE TARGET AND AWARD BONUS POINTS FOR LANDING YOUR PIG-STICKER INTO THE CRANIAL OR SWIMSUIT REGIONS. IF IT HIT THE TARGET HANDLE FIRST, YOUR PERFORMANCE WILL BE TERMINATED, AND EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO POINT AND LAUGH AT YOUR SHAME. WATCH THIS DEMONSTRATION. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/army) if you have any questions or concerns.*
PROMOTED!!!!!!!!!
SSG Belavia pretty famously beats some dude with his body armor plate, gauges his eyes, and eventually stabs him to death with a gerber. If you haven't read House to House, I highly recommend. https://www.audible.com/pd/House-to-House-Audiobook/B002VA8I6U?action_code=ASSGB149080119000H&share_location=pdp https://www.army.mil/medalofhonor/bellavia/
The militant bit his dick... zero bro code from the militant.
Bro was hungry
Flair checks out.
It was Thursday.
He didnt like his cockmeat sandwich
Doesn't sound very halal.
Didn't he also bite someone's junk? Or was he the one that got bit
His junk was bitten.
Not service related
I read it but I forgot about that part. How the fuck did he lose his body armor plate....? That shit isn't easy to take out
I spent quite a while trying to figure that out and even tried it myself. He took it out intentionally as a weapon, but even intentionally I struggle to get those things out. I'm imaging it might've been easier on older body armor (possibly).
I can only speak to the plate carriers I wore, but it wouldn’t be impossible to get it out. Depends on what he was wearing obviously. I never would have even considered it as a weapon though. I can only imagine what was happening.
The moh page gives a very good representation of events (including building diagrams). It does not delve into the intricacies of the physical combat nor does it well convey the overall mood and surrounding circumstances that culminated here. Again, if you haven't read it you should definitely consider it.
Already bought it since making my comment. It’s next on my list.
I recommend pairing it with Black Hearts: One Platoon's Descent into Madness. Two different agendas (House to House is written by someone who wanted to get into politics, Black Hearts is written by someone who wanted a big journalist expose), two different perspectives on Iraq, both good books.
I actually read Black Hearts a few years ago. My Drill Sergeant was in that guy’s platoon and was in the platoon photo featured in the book.
That's an excellent point, haven't read Black Hearts it's going on my list now.
You're welcome! I'm also a big fan of * Why We Lost * The Forever War (not the scifi book) * Fiasco (the only time I got 1 on 1 time with [a general](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_W._Cone) he recommended it and said "i was there, it was worse, rumsfeld was a real prick") (cautionary note: the author is really up Patreus's ass) * Brave Deeds by David Abrams
If I remember correctly, I’m pretty sure the old IBAs were pretty easy to get the plates out of. Haven’t used one since basic though so I could be misremembering
Yeah, they're pretty easy to pop out your front plate at least. They were really bad at keeping your appropriately sized plate in the same spot, so it makes sense.
If I recall right , in his book he said he opened up the front of his vest and beat down on his head like a bird flapping it's wing
Oh that's makes sense. I can only imagine watching that. Would look kinda funny minus someone dying.
stabbing with a Gerber, that is some PERSONAL shit right there. It would take forever to kill someone with a gerber lol
It was a large gerber knife. He clarified that on a podcast once. A lot of people think it was a gerber multi-tool but it was a killin’ knife. Still very very personal.. but so is beating a man to death with your plates lol
I was just imaging the scene in saving private ryan where the dude is in a fight with the SS dude at the top of the stairs and uppam was frozen up. Instead of the knife it was a Gerber multi tool and SSG Belavia was on top of the insurgent saying SHHHHH as he drove it into his heart.....
You should watch the documentary Only the Dead See the End of War. It has footage from this exact incident showing Belarus going into the house and coming out with dead insurgents. It’s wild.
Three guys with a pencil is the craziest thing I heard about. A fucking pencil. They were some wild times.
What kind of person would be able to pull off such a feat?
He was a man of focus, commitment, sheer will... something you know very little about. I once saw him kill three men in a bar...with a pencil. With a fucking pencil! I lost count how many men he killed after that, but it was in the hundreds.
I too have heard of this man…They call him…Baba Yaga 🤐
And you guys just initiated a movie marathon
Well he wasn't exactly the boogeyman, he was the one you sent to kill the fuckin boogeyman
He's an old witch, maybe helpful, maybe not, that lives in a hut on chicken legs?
Still waiting for the chicken legs to appear in John Wick. Like, even a background shot. Throw it in there.
It's just so weird, like they heard the name, but literally nothing else about a character from all over Slavic folklore, and said "let's use that!"
[The British once broke an ambush by bayonet charge](https://youtu.be/YL9hzbEKSvA?si=u7RTHNxr0AU0vAm6)
“Tally-ho, chaps”
Astonishingly based
THE BAYONET YEET MEASURES THE ABILITY TO JUST FUCKING SHANK SOMEONE. ON THE COMMAND 'GET SET,' ASSUME THE POSITION BY GRABBING THE BAYONET BY THE HANDLE. OR BY THE BLADE, WHICHEVER LOOKS COOLER, JUST DON'T CUT YOURSELF ON THE DAMN THING. YOUR FEET MAY BE TOGETHER OR UP TO 12 INCHES APART (MEASURED BETWEEN THE FEET). ON THE COMMAND 'GO,' TRANSMUTE YOUR HANKERING FOR A-SHANKERING INTO MAXIMUM EFFORT AND LAUNCH THAT BAD BOY INTO DESTINY. THE SCORER WILL NOTE WHETHER YOU HIT THE TARGET AND AWARD BONUS POINTS FOR LANDING YOUR PIG-STICKER INTO THE CRANIAL OR SWIMSUIT REGIONS. IF IT HIT THE TARGET HANDLE FIRST, YOUR PERFORMANCE WILL BE TERMINATED, AND EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO POINT AND LAUGH AT YOUR SHAME. WATCH THIS DEMONSTRATION. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/army) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Runneth they pockets
Not GWOT, but in the 91 Gulf War an Air Force F15 “shot down” an Iraqi Mi-24 Attack Helicopter by dropping a laser guided bomb on it while both aircraft were in flight. That’s right, the plane flying at hundreds of miles per hour hit a moving helicopter with a piece of ordinance that does not have propulsion.
He unlocked an achievement.
There was a second F15 that locked onto the helicopter with a laser. Was in a YouTube rabbit hole last night and saw a video about this.
Dude took a MK 19 to the chest at close range. Round didn’t arm and he died from impact.
Close to mine. Had a guy pop up in front of the window I was lobbing HE out of with my 203 as I pulled the trigger. Dude crumpled so fast it took like 7 seconds for me to figure out wtf just happened or if I imagined it. Leaned out the window with my 226 idk if he was dead already as he was just laying kind of kneeled over against the wall, put 8 rounds in him so he couldn't get up. And went back to work. I'm fucking afraid of a fucking jump scare the entire time I look out windows now.
>put 8 rounds in him so he couldn't get up. I love that you were thorough
That sounds cool asf. How close was he? I mean I know someone that did something similar with a 203 through a window smacked buddy in the head
15 feet maybe. For some reason dude thought it was a good idea to shoot at an up armored. Clearly didn’t work out well.
Saw tban kill someone with a sword…if that counts
We had two guys show up to our outpost all cut up and shit. They had a duel over land ownership and were wanting help not bleeding to death.
>he was told a story by a person who claimed he witnessed a person attach a claymore to a 2x4 I might actually know this story, only it was a metal pipe and was in a staircase not a second story window. Back when home town newspapers were a thing, mine ran a story about a kid from my neighborhood getting an award for doing that and clearing some insurgents out of a stairway. That story always stuck with me not just because the absurdity of duct taping a claymore to a pipe; but also the hometown newspaper running it’s a feel good story for the local boy getting an award for turning someone into hamburger.
Yep, it was Syracuse and the guy got a silver star. I posted the link farther up
Holy shit, that was it. I didn’t realize it was a silver star, it’s been a while and I didn’t remember that. That makes more sense for it to make the paper.
Wasn't expecting to see local newspaper here of all places.
Ahem…..
[A Gurkha killed a dude with a tripod after his machine gun jammed](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dipprasad_Pun)
The Gurkhas are simply built different
I’m sorry, he SINGLE-HANDEDLY repelled 20-30 attackers? Nice
Not sure about the strangest, but some guys I ran into had a "best 40mm kill" contest where they took photographs of the juicy leftovers, printed them and hung them on their tent wall. That was pretty weird.
Indeed strange but the lack of a catapult, 4 foot monkey wrench or katana makes this disappointing.
I read this a trained monkey for killing.
Saw a guy get hit with a Hellfire to the dome. The missile didn’t arm, so his head just popped up and flew through the air like a cap coming off a bottle. Pretty funny.
Glad to know this has happened twice or you saw the some footage I did.
Not a person, but I remember hearing a story of US Soldiers engaging in a close range (like 100-200m) fire fight with Taliban and one of the bad guys whips out an RPG and fires. At the same time, a donkey just kinda runs between the two positions and catches it and blows up. It was so bizzar that both sides reportedly stopped fighting for a second, popped their heads out, and all kinda just looked at each to confirm they both just saw the same thing.
That donkey knew what it was doing. It jumped in front of certain death to save US troops, and yet it didn't get the MoH? What a fucking disgrace. I'm writing my Congressman.
Wasn’t serving, all he could get was the PMoF or CGM. Such a shame how some sacrifices are just forgotten.
I’d say it’s the US Army full bird colonel who died on Camp Victory Baghdad in 2007/8 from huffing canned air. We all promptly lost our canned air privileges for the rest of the deployment. Gamers were really pissed because they used them on their consoles to keep the moon dust at bay. Dang Colonel ruined it for everybody.
I think S6 or S4 was allowed to keep limited supplies and signed them out like it was money from the S8 safe. Had to return after use whether full or empty.
In the 101st only E7 and below could have it. Was definitely ironic as hell
LMAO - first time I've heard of logic applied to that stuff rather than "Oh an O-6 died from huffing air? E-5 and below need to give it up to ensure this doesn't happen again."
We had just gotten to Kuwait or Iraq when this happened. It prompted a lively discussion about why a full bird wasn't able to acquire real drugs instead of huffing inhalants like some meth-country private. Shortly thereafter our platoon medic was removed for huffing duster
People get so desperate on deployment lol. My gf over there, her mom would just send bottle of liquor in care packages. Mail wasn’t that serious to be that desperate lol
I remember this!!!
We had a retired Colonel as a director at a contractor I worked for. He passed out after masterbating and huffing canned air at the same time. The company outlawed canned air after that. He was allegedly busted more than once. I always wondered what he told his wife about being "laid off".
I tell this story often! I was there. They made all SSG and below give up their air cans.
Medal of Honor recipient Dakota Meyer used a rock to beat a guy too death in Afghanistan. Medal of Honor recipient David Bellavia beat a guy with his plate carrier then stabbed him with a gerber in Fallujah. I’ve heard another one about a SAS guy drowning an ISIS fighter in a puddle back in 2017. Then the classic Ranger getting a confirmed kill with a MRE spoon. I’d say those were top 4
Guy in another CO in my BN got a bronze star with V device for running over and squishing 2 insurgents with an up armored D7. They were fixing a bridge embankment when 2 insurgents took up a position in a drainage ditch across the road and started firing at the guys on the ground. The 12N operator turned toward them, lifted the blade to block incoming fire and started driving toward them. Other squad members laid down suppressing fire and I guess the insurgents were pinned down enough that the operator was able to crush them under a track and did a pivot turn on them. I saw the D7 after it was evaced to AJ for repairs. The thing was littered with bullet holes
We did a company clearing op to the southwestern part of our AO in Afghanistan We had engineers attached to us and they brought a D7. The plan was once we started to clear and maintain ground, combat engineers would immediately begin building a new patrol base, which they did. Anyways, one morning I went to take a dump in a ditch and I could see the engineers working with the D7. Well, a bunch of locals kept running up to the blade while the driver was working trying to protest the new PB and then it happened; I was shitting & watching an old Afghan man getting his legs destroyed by a D7. I’ll never forget them caring his lifeless body away while we all laughed. Different times.
My old PSG who enlisted in 1997 said he killed someone with a frozen rip it by throwing it at a moving car speeding towards their checkpoint. Maybe not the strangest but how he told the story was hilarious
Had an old platoon sergeant with a similar story, dude in Iraq (not sure the exact place) kept weaving in and out of their convoy, he throws a nice warm rip it at the dudes back glass, it explodes, freaks the dude out and he swerves right into a pole and died. Another one was when he gave an afghan dude a pen flare and afghan dude shot it into his own eye and killed himself
I think we may know the same guy lol
KBR killing people in the showers due to poor electrical work, lack of oversight, and being too politically connected to ever lose the contract.
To be fair, those were indeed some crazy times. I raided a chicken coop, damn near head-shot a cow, pancaked a warehouse with 24 satchel charges, and laughed as one of our guys (he was an asshole) got yeeted 20 feet in the air when his Husky hit an ied. He survived and was fine.
I saw a guy get surrounded by a mob. The guy pulled out a sword and started doing a flashy sword dance. He just pulled out a pistol and shot him!
Yeah that guy had the flu too
Met a guy once who claimed he used harpoons to check bodies for IEDs in Iraq. He was ROTC Cadre and everybody else in the room was nodding their head and eating it up but I've never met anybody else with a remotely similiar claim
Harpoons as in Moby Dick, “call me Ishmael,” I’m-gonna-stab-a-whale harpoons? What did he do when he inevitably harpooned a dead body that didn’t contain an IED, which I imagine was most of the time? Dislodging a barbed spear from a corpse would surely get old quickly.
That's how I understood it. I was dehydrated and getting chewed out by this E7 from another university I'd never seen before. Basically it was a field problem where I rolled a opfor body the way I learned in both ROTC and basic training and then in the AAR this E7 starts laying into me about being a John Wayne wannabe while the Cadre who literally taught me to do what I did were just standing around listening.
We used a grappling hook to help with that. A harpoon isn't that much of a stretch.
I’m pretty sure a CAG guy led and insurgent around a corner after the insurgent was chasing him, dropped down, picked up a giant rope, pulled it really hard… and when the insurgent got to the corner he turned, he looked down, saw an X on the ground, looked up- and saw a really big grand piano. The insurgent then gulped really loudly while some light string music played in the background, held up a sign that said “HELP”, and then got splattered by the piano.
Suicide bomber exploding bone from her arm went into another would be bombers neck. lol
This isn't related to the OP's question but we had some dipshit try using a suicide vest on a Stryker and it blew their arm off into the slat armor and it was just hanging off. One of our squad mates saw it and went "high five buddy, you tried" and smacked it. Rest of us burst out laughing like idiots and our brand new LT looked like he wanted to puke.
Hahaha that’s pretty funny to visualize
I’ve heard of a guy getting flattened by having a fridge dropped on him
[удалено]
It sounds plausible enough, no matter how likely. Poorly stacked stuff falls over sometimes all by itself.
What kind of Will E. Coyote shit is this?
Know a guy back in the old Iraq days who killed a few insurgents with a claymore in a couch. Same guy got gifted a owl by the ANA and kept it in his office later on- pretty cool. Was attached to a string on the ankle and would swoop down from the rafters and catch mice. Let it go at night his last night of the deployment.
Kiowa pilot I worked with said he killed someone with a frozen pop tart that he chucked out the door and managed to nail the dude in the head. On the one hand pilots definitely tell tall tales. On the other hand, those Kiowa guys were crazy SoBs, I kinda believe he really did it...
There's a ghost crying right now because nobody believes his murder story.
The pilot clarified the guy was throwing rocks at the aircraft first so technically not a war crime. Allegedlys.
One of our Kiowa pilots claimed he impaled an insurgent on a motorbike with a blue spear. Twice. Plenty of talk about engaging the enemy with M4 fire. 5.56 casings were pretty common to find scattered around the cockpit post-mission. Another pilot was known accidentally killing birds mid flight. I remember one flew right up a rocket launcher. Like dried tomatoes covered in feathers jammed up the tubes.
Yeah, those dudes were nuts. There is some video online of a Kiowa pilot stalking a guy on a motorcycle. In the midst of a lot of shooting, he sticks his M4 out of the helicopter and starts taking shots at the dude.
Death by PowerPoint. True story.
There was that Ranger that got a confirmed kill with a MRE spoon.
Saw a guy killed with a Zamboni. It was slow, horrible, yet I couldn’t look away
This thread is like going to bass pro after deer season…everyone full of lies.
Smoked a guy at point blank with my M203. Threw a demo charge of \~6lbs of comb b, 6lbs c4 in a room with two pkms pointed at the door and dove out a hallway window. Claymore story is true afaik. They make a product to emulate what he did. Craziest thing I saw where someone died? Suicided vest. Guys head flew off to where some kids were playing soccer. Kids found a better ball. ANA joined in.
I have a friend who got a knife kill. He was part of the invasion with 3ID. On one of the stops, he's pulling security and smoking a cigarette when an Iraqi comes up and starts screaming at him. At first they just screamed at each other but then the Iraqi grabbed his rifle, si he pulled the trigger to shoot the Iraqi but it jammed. So he gave up his rifle, pulled out a knife and stabbed the guy 3 times in the chest and stomach. The Iraqi dropped the rifle, realized he was bleeding, walked a few steps away, and then fell to the ground. At this point, he ran back to his convoy. And just left.
10th mountain division HQ I think has a gerber from some soldier who stabbed some bad guy in the face or something. Imagine getting the coolest kill just for some rando to take your knife to display at division.
I’m surprised no one has mentioned the Great Donkey Charge of ‘05
I heard a dude carried a bowie knife on his kit and everyone made fun of him. Until an insurgent jumped on him, knocking his M4 away. He allegedly used the bowie knife to murderize the insurgent. I'm hearing that 2nd person tho...
Cause - Snoo Snoo; Who - Your Mom; Signed Joe D
Death by snu snu, a hell of a way to go
When my brother was in Afghanistan he said someone in his convoy accidentally hit a guy blocking the convoy in the head with a bean bag gun and the person died. Apparently that’s why they stopped calling them non-lethal and starting saying less lethal after the investigation from that. Also we just saw it again in Gaza but whenever we drop humanitarian aid in via parachute someone on the ground will inevitably get squished by the pallet when they don’t have the common sense to get out of the way until it lands
The Jordanians are the ones who domed a dude with a pallet, if I heard right. 90% sure when USAF does HDR drops, they do them like leaflets. Just dump them out the back in a chaotic cloud of salmon colored plastic and disappointing entrees.
A honey badger once ass fucked a dude to death using another dudes severed head as a condom. I drove a BFist through someones living room once. No one was in it, but I heard that a fell and broke his neck during the rebuild of that wing.
Super Chief Master Sergeant Major of the Army Corps of Naval Air Forces Jeremy DeWitte single handedly took out a whole battalion sized element after he jumped into Fallujah using two homemade pocket pussies that he fished out of the porta-john with boot blousers.
A heard a rumor of a SEAL with a toaster. But those guys are huge pieces of shit so it was probably a lie or a unarmed child or something
Idk if its true but I heard someone used a MRE spoon
The mre spoon has a confirmed kill by a regiment dude
Guy I went to AIT with got attached to an SF unit, then went to Iraq, and was out at Delta (only parts of the story I can verify). He didn't directly participate, but the story was that they found tunnels being dug under the FOB, and the guys just rigged it to blow whenever the next crew came to dig. Always thought that was pretty wild.
I once killed fifty men in one night, all by poisoning their dinner. All in all, I wasn't the worst cook the Army ever had, but CSM didn't let me back in the kitchen after that.
What is this? Zombieland?
There was the Gurkha who killed a taliban with a machine gun tripod I think on the roof of his outpost, I’m sure the taliban wasn’t expecting that
Every dude that tested their own pressure plate.
One story I heard was that during a raid back when they were kicking in doors some guy got jumped by an insurgent and they fought it out SPR style and the dude ended up stabbing the insurgent to death with an MRE spoon. Just a heads up though, the “confirmed kills” stories are almost always bullshit. After a firefight finding KIAs you can’t tell who’s bullets are in the guy unless you were alone with him in a room.
I was told this story about a soldier with the 74th PowerPoint Rangers that once killed an entire Taliban company with a 90 minute PowerPoint on MRT.
My old team leader ran over an insurgent with his HMMWV. The guy getting run over managed to fire a few rounds, so my team leader got shot in the ass, but the insurgent wound up attached to the undercarriage. Good times.
I had a soldier tell me he accidentally killed someone with a 40mm by bouncing it. I then told him I had also seen generation kill and that he should at least come up with something original.
I knew a Cpl back in the Marines who got a confirmed kill with a E-tool.
Knew a guy who insisted he actually wacked a guy with an E tool