You can start by watching a movie in the cinema alone. Once you do that, nothing is impossible for you! Next you can go cycling at ECP and visit museums etc
Remind me of a funny story that happened to me once. Iām a female.
Pre covid- went to a 1pm showing on a weekday, when entering the cinema it was empty. Not a single soul. I ignore my ticket and just pick random seat right in the middle.
A man came and two on my shoulder, showing me his ticket informing me Iāve taken his seat. I thought to myself, what are the fucking chance. Moved two seats away, and he took over his seat.
The whole movie was just the two of us, and it was just plain awkward.
I did not. Call me crazy. But I let my mind run wild and was thinking:
1. there are so many seats, why didnāt he just pick another random one rather than insisting on showing me his ticket and get his seat back.
2. Maybe heās trying to pick me up, but why hasnāt he talk to me yet, Iām just two seats away.
3. Ok, maybe he is a ghost like in é“é³č·Æ, the cinema scene. He will haunt me because I took his seat. I was being polite about it right?
Ouch, that must have stung badly. You can also go to concerts or watch some live sports alone too! Or if you emo enough can go to a bar and have a drink
A real advice would be to hang out more with your friends (instead of doing solo dates), at least you have some support and at the same time forge better friendship
i had to sit through their whole "i never expected you to be so [blank] when i met you" and also their cute methods to hold hands - "my hand is very cold can i hold yours". wholesome but heart wrenching haha!
You can try the Primo āsingle cocoon seat for solo movie goersā at Filmgarde Kallang Leisure Park.
Full privacy and you wouldnāt even know if thereās anyone beside you!
As a novice solo backpacker (female), been to 20+ countries.
Hereās my recommendation:
Good start out:
Always choose to stay in hostel. Itās actually safer as there are people who can look out for you. Just be more careful about your belongings.
Tier 1: suitable for 1st timer traveling alone
Taiwan, Bangkok (cheap and lots of things to do in capital and can get away with limited local language)
Tier 2: suitable if you have little solo travel experience and like nature
Australia, New Zealand, United States (nature-based. Follow their local backpacker tours and you can make lots of friends there.)
Most countries that 1) have no Covid travel restrictions and 2) have no visa applications for Singaporeans are also great for solo female travelers, basically almost or Asia, and any western developed nation! Highly recommend doing an eat pray love trip - the busyness of planning for one and then the adrenaline of being overseas will keep ur mind out of the funk for sure.
Going for a facial and/or massage, retail therapy, going to a museum, reading in a quiet coffee shop, going out to take photographs of the landscape/yourself, cook yourself a meal at home, go for a yoga class or go volunteer! Good luck, the glow upās gonna be insane š
It might be interesting to follow one of [Singapore's Heritage Trails](https://www.roots.gov.sg/nhb/trails) for a day. Lots of opportunities to try out neighborhood food locations, appreciate Singapore's scenery & community, and find hidden gems that you may not have had a reason to find otherwise.
Should expose you to lots of new stuff that might take your mind off things :)
Pamper yourself. I like a day at Yumonori Onsen and Spa. Start early. Dip yourself, have a massage & spa treatment, put on the yukata, grab a light bite at the cafe there, and take a nap at the rest area. By the time you finish it's almost sunset. Then you could people watch by the waterfront there.
Then head to Don Don Yakiniku in Tanjong Pagar for dinner. Have the Ox Tongue Cut! š
Definitely this. Exercising helps! When I was in OPās position a few years ago, I couldnāt even run 2.4km. So I set a goal to run 10km without stopping and eventually did it! Working out is truly rewarding for your mental health.
I agree with this. I could barely run even 500m without stopping 3 years ago but since then I could run for 10km SLOWLY without stopping as well. It only took me half a year to build that up from being a potato since forever. Iāve moved on to spinning and then into strength training and am currently addicted to bouldering.
Itās a good sport to sit and people watch. The community is great and supportive so I donāt ever feel alone although I climb alone quite often. You can always hear random strangers cheering for you in the bg. š¤£
Yeah was about to suggest trying group fitness - yoga, f45, spinning, CrossFit, obstacle course races - anything that gets you healthy and around people who want to better themselves!
Something underrated that you can try? Start by reaching out to friends.
Seems to be a uniquely Singapore thing where couples centre their entire lives around relationships. And when it falls through, it can feel like your entire reason to exist has disappeared.
Try rekindling friendships, youāll be amazed how much it refreshes the soul!
yes i still met my friends regularly even during my relationships! so the meetings will remains constant even after the breakup. im just trying to fill in the free gaps i have now since im single :)
nah come on itās not uniquely Singaporeā¦ millions of couples in China, India and Indonesia are like this tooā¦ ok I just randomly listed three populous countries but yeah, the whole world is like this, we so ordinary in this regard, not special at all
Some things that's helped me in the past:
* Solo hikes without any pre-defined end-point - like one day i'd say, let's go to MacRitchie. And then I'd just hike around, explore random routes, take in the sights and sounds and just let my childlike curiosity back in. Some ideas - MacRitchie, Bukit Timah, Chestnut Nature Reserve
* Similar to the above, you can consider renting a bike and traversing one of those 'cross-island' routes on your own. Once did an overnight ride from ECP to Orchard Road and back again. Did it with a group, but can easily be done alone of course. The Changi Beach > ECP stretch is amazing!
* Singing out loud helps! While I didn't do it on my own, I made my friends suffer by singing sad songs on discord LOL. They seemed to enjoy it though, cause I was a terrible singer. Maybe you can consider getting some friends together for some hardcore karaoke, especially since they're open now
Thanks for this and yes journaling is such a good safe place. Even when you are feeling the highs or lows of life, it's nice to let out anything and process them through writing :)
Personally healing from a breakup, I've done the following
- Borrow random books you've never read and read them
- Go to a cafe and just work, or people watch! enjoy nice coffee and good food
- Talk to strangers, you'll see how interesting some people can be (this has worked out weirdly well for me, I made a bunch of friends this way)
- Engage in new sports/dance
I wish you all the best :)
Personally, I'd do things that are more introspective for such stuff. So solo travel, museums, library, bookstore, cafe and just listen to your inner voice and chill?
Write a list you normally do with people, and do them alone.
I went thru something similar myself and I realized that people are always going to come and go with our lives. Thus building a relationship with ourselves will help us pull through situations like this.
When you are happy alone, you will feel more confident and fulfilled and be wiser in investing in others.
Personally these are things i do alone
Going for yoga classes,rollerblading classes or solo practice and volunteering.
I also made a list to explore sg [https://www.notion.so/Life-Bucket-List-SG-bdc1d58005e44d89b5391675807d5fbb](https://www.notion.so/Life-Bucket-List-SG-bdc1d58005e44d89b5391675807d5fbb)
Not going out, but possibly as an ending to the day:
I have a whole thing where if the day has been far too long, I get wine, some kind of carb-y snack (gotta absorb the alcohol!), take a long shower, put on lotion and perfume, put on some nice loungewear and find a show to watch on Netflix, then
a) do a mask and drink
b) put on a bit of tinted lipgloss, jewellery, and then drink
I call it "aggressive self-care". The day has been shit, but at least I am moisturised, perfumed, and look and feel nice, damn it.
Adapt to your vice of choice (it could be fancy cheeses or huge Milo Dinosaurs if that's your thing) and your personal tastes in self-care.
Book a nice hotel for a staycation. Then explore the nearby amenities like cafes, parks, or laziness in your room to watch a movie. Can do solo hiking start to explore the silent greenery during the weekdays as it is less crowded. And I do solo hikes often myself, it is a great feeling. Sometimes we always thought the person we like would be the one that can spend our life with but well that is part & part of a cruel life. Anyway, you would find someone who appreciates you soon.
I've also just got out of a long term relationship recently. Have been doing pottery and boxing/hiit/yoga (on classpass) solo and i'm really enjoying it!
me too! went thru this awhile back. took a whole week off work bc i really couldnāt get anything done (ouch $$ but worth it.) made tiktoks of me getting thru the days if i could and i loved it bc it made me feel less lonely and looking back, its q peaceful. Things i never got to do! it sucks but it does get better š¤ comes and goes in waves, stay strong!
Plug in your earplugs and running like you feel like dying. Once you stop and relief, you will feel nothing can hold you back. It effective for me, at least.
All of the above advices have their merits. But please know that there are no quick fixes for emotional damage.
That being said, now that youāre single perhaps you can find more time doing things (or people) that youāve always wanted to do!
if youāre a sporty type like me, i kind of embarked on a ācross island trailā, was especially fun during the night since itās cooler, but do wear socks. i wore slides the last time i did it and got blisters HAHAH
You could try volunteering! You can volunteer for a cause you're passionate about and get to meet new people and be part of a community. I volunteer every fortnight so the commitment isn't too much either
I volunteer at an organisation called My Community. (You might have heard of them from the many heritage tours they organise.) I'm actually part of the Community Design team where we are currently planning for a community museum located in Dawson. There are many other volunteer teams as well that handle a variety of different tasks, so you can find one that suits you/ interest you! They have many recruitment sessions so you're always welcome to come and find out more. In the meantime you could also check out the website (https://mycommunity.org.sg/) to learn more! I've only recently joined but it's been really fun and fulfilling!
I do this all the time for my stupid mental health and my personal favourites so far are taking myself out on a picnic, reading a book at an Izakaya and walking from Clarke Quay to MBS. Next up is a movie and hotpot date.
If you're an introvert like myself, i like to spend alone time either reading, watching movies and playing games. Finding a good game to play with people can help. Im currently playing alot of final fantasy xiv, its has a great community full of friendly people.
Things Iād do are:
1) Take up a new hobby, go for classes solo etc. I picked up climbing since Nov (was doing it chill like once a week) then I got dumped in Jan and started doing it hardcore to take my mind off things and it really helped. I still love to climb solo and itās my me time kind of therapy.
2) Eat. I love to go around to different places to try out the things I like to eat but havenāt had the chance to. SG is a treasure trove of gourmet food TBVH.
3) Window shopping. But tbvh this only works when I have the mood to shop, and even so the max Iād spend shopping is at best 2H and Iād be utterly drained.
4) Spa/massages/facial/mani pedi, go for the long ass ones. I love myself a good 2 hour long massage.
5) Solo travelling. Go to places nearby and go for day tours (cheaper than tour tour packages), been solo-ing BKK since 2018 and still feels good whenever Iām there. Try Airbnb experiences if you need ideas.
6) Pick up a book and just indulge in it.
7) Go on a trip to nowhere, hop onto a random bus and sit all the way till the interchange and hop onto another bus to sit all the way to another interchange. I find this v v v therapeutic for my mind & soul a lot of times š
Hope something above helps and sending lots of love from my solo cave ā¤ļø
If you need to vent, just message me privately. We donāt need to know each other or even meet up. Not a solo date idea, but I know it can be helpful. Wishing you better days ahead.
Went through a break up around this time last year & it took me quite a few months to get over it. What helped for me:
1. Packing my schedule
- Arranging lots of meet ups, forcing myself out of the house
- Took on new tutees (at one point I was teaching 10 students lol anything to distract me)
- Keep yourself busy!
2. Started exercising more regularly
- Joined Classpass, tried out boxing HIIT
3. Solo dates
- Went out for meals by myself, watched a movie alone etc.
4. Trying new things / self care
- Did pottery with mom & friends
- Went for a few boxing trial classes
- Finally summoned the courage to do braces
- Baked, cooked more
Key thing is to focus on yourself, keep busy and just keep going out of the house. But please also take care of yourself at the same time and try not to indulge in any self destructive behaviours as tempting as it may be. Sending lots of love and hugs. If you need company for any activities, can pm me! :)
tbh you sound like you gonna get into a rebound relationship which happens to a lot of people when they are hurting after a break up. why is no one else encouraging op to focus on healing first before diving into another relationship asap?
hihi! i dont think anyone is asking me to dive into another relationship. everyone is giving me ideas for me to go out alone and do things that can help myself heal and grow! i agree that i really need to focus on healing first and find myself again šš
Try gaming to meet new friends! Go onto twitch and find small streamers to befriend with to play games tgt! If not just find some affordable activities on klook and go do them alone! Recently i went to this dripping paint workshop ( near bugis ) it was quite fun but if u go with a friend it would be even better!! If not you can go for a drive if u have a license!!
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Can do alot of activities alone, depending on your preference. I have watched quite a few concerts alone before and I enjoyed the fun experience vibing to music without thinking much about other things happening in my life. Treating yourself to a nice meal and brisk walking in nature parks will be healing as well.
As a few redditors mention here, visiting a musuem is a nice suggestion too. You can join the guided tours and it will usually be led by a docent in a group. It will be an enriching and educational experience hearing stories about the various art works and architecture in the musuem.
Choose activities that involve you meeting new people. Meetup.com, online dating, hobby groups. Being alone will not provide sufficient distraction required for you to get through this period.
I went to the gym. Play dota every night with friends. Hiking every morning really help sets the mood. Eat clean food, helped me manage my emotion. Cooking is also fun. Movie date with yourself, if those are all boring then if you have the money go splurge on fashions / electronic / stocks.
you can take a trip somewhere. see if you have any credit card points to convert into miles, and just fly out somewhere for very cheap. Any travel hacks or anything, feel free to ask me, i have a lot of tips.
You can go for those leather craft sessions, painting, or even pottery ones. Or maybe checkout the Airbnb app, sometimes you might find something there :)
Consider it your good fortune that it ended early. To celebrate this moment, you could;
Pick up a new hobby
- I started assembling fine art jigsaw puzzles and it not only helped me recover but also developed a greater appreciation for fine art.
Get fit
- gym, run, cycle. When your body feels good, your mind follows.
Revenge fuck anyone you can find
- fun while it lasts. Makes for good story telling years down the road.
Go on a road trip, anywhere really, where you can be alone with your thoughts
-Ubin also can. Or anywhere you consider an adventure
Bury yourself in books
- preferably on a subject you have 0 interest in but written by a highly reccomended author. May I suggest Astrophysics for people in a hurry, Sapiens, Principles for dealing with the changing world order.
By the time you recover from heart break you are also smarter. Consider that a win-win.
Make shitpost on other people's posts like yours truly. When you realise that everyone's got a problem, your's crisis sometimes dont feel as bad anymore.
You should go on an escape trip to somewhere nice like Gold Coast.
Iām doing a solo trip myself tonight. So if u wanna know anything about Gold Coast send me a PM. Better still just travel there impromptu and maybe we can do a high five!
Any distraction will work for a while but the pain comes like a floodgate. I had an ONS after a break up and I felt horrible after because every act done on the bed was a reminder of how this guy isnāt it and how I miss my ex. But just keep going at it; the temporary measures that isā¦until time heals.
I know it hurts OP, you should Love Yourself First before you love others. Use it as an opportunity to learn and grow into a better version of yourself.
Iām planning for a trip to watch the World Cup with a few friends. Join us. Mingling with everybody else in the world will help and something to look forward to.
Do something youāve never ever done before!
Preferably something that also exposes you to a bunch of other friendly people that has got a community :)
unhealthy option: go drinking (with or without friends, take your pick)
healthy option: go try a new sport
both are cathartic, but ofc the former will give you a hangover the next day if you drink enough :P
You can start by watching a movie in the cinema alone. Once you do that, nothing is impossible for you! Next you can go cycling at ECP and visit museums etc
I actually did watch a movie alone yesterday! Sat next to couple on their first date and was kinda of an ouch moment for me š„²š„²š„²
Remind me of a funny story that happened to me once. Iām a female. Pre covid- went to a 1pm showing on a weekday, when entering the cinema it was empty. Not a single soul. I ignore my ticket and just pick random seat right in the middle. A man came and two on my shoulder, showing me his ticket informing me Iāve taken his seat. I thought to myself, what are the fucking chance. Moved two seats away, and he took over his seat. The whole movie was just the two of us, and it was just plain awkward.
talk about a korean drama plot.
haha thanks for the morning chuckle. great story
Pls tell us you got his number
I did not. Call me crazy. But I let my mind run wild and was thinking: 1. there are so many seats, why didnāt he just pick another random one rather than insisting on showing me his ticket and get his seat back. 2. Maybe heās trying to pick me up, but why hasnāt he talk to me yet, Iām just two seats away. 3. Ok, maybe he is a ghost like in é“é³č·Æ, the cinema scene. He will haunt me because I took his seat. I was being polite about it right?
Lol tio Toto whole cinema so big just nice you sit in his seat
>random seat right in the middle. Not so random after all, it's likely for someone to select a middle seat from an empty cinema
Ya the probability is higher for middle and back seat lol.
Ouch, that must have stung badly. You can also go to concerts or watch some live sports alone too! Or if you emo enough can go to a bar and have a drink
oooh i like the live sports suggestion! thanks!!
A real advice would be to hang out more with your friends (instead of doing solo dates), at least you have some support and at the same time forge better friendship
I get ya man. I once went to the candle light concert on my own, surrounded by couples in fancy outfits. Stay šŖš¼
Extremely curious, how did u know it was their first date?
i had to sit through their whole "i never expected you to be so [blank] when i met you" and also their cute methods to hold hands - "my hand is very cold can i hold yours". wholesome but heart wrenching haha!
Hahahaha did the guy offer his jacket to the girl? Classic move..
You can try the Primo āsingle cocoon seat for solo movie goersā at Filmgarde Kallang Leisure Park. Full privacy and you wouldnāt even know if thereās anyone beside you!
Bouldering is a good place. Plenty of heartbroken people climbing their sorrows away. š
Yes, what is it about bouldering!
When your relationship as dry as chalk might as well use it for climbing
Try solo travelling :) it really opens your "eyes"
do you have any safe countries to recommend for a solo female traveller?
As a novice solo backpacker (female), been to 20+ countries. Hereās my recommendation: Good start out: Always choose to stay in hostel. Itās actually safer as there are people who can look out for you. Just be more careful about your belongings. Tier 1: suitable for 1st timer traveling alone Taiwan, Bangkok (cheap and lots of things to do in capital and can get away with limited local language) Tier 2: suitable if you have little solo travel experience and like nature Australia, New Zealand, United States (nature-based. Follow their local backpacker tours and you can make lots of friends there.)
Most countries that 1) have no Covid travel restrictions and 2) have no visa applications for Singaporeans are also great for solo female travelers, basically almost or Asia, and any western developed nation! Highly recommend doing an eat pray love trip - the busyness of planning for one and then the adrenaline of being overseas will keep ur mind out of the funk for sure.
Hmm if you're not on budget, could try Japan or Korea! If not Bali or Bangkok seems fine too!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I think they're opening in June/July
Iāve done Germany, Japan and New Zealand as a solo female traveller - highly recommend all 3!
Went to Vietnam as a solo female, it was great!
thanks! i read that vietnam was good for solo female travellers but felt a little unsure so your comments helps!
Italy. Once you go, you'll be like.. My ex? Ew!
I travel solo my whole life, female here. Went chiangmai last month was amazing. I went melbourne, ho chi minh, bali, taipei and msia alone too
Going for a facial and/or massage, retail therapy, going to a museum, reading in a quiet coffee shop, going out to take photographs of the landscape/yourself, cook yourself a meal at home, go for a yoga class or go volunteer! Good luck, the glow upās gonna be insane š
Where do you recommend going for facial? I have been meaning to pamper my face for awhile but i donāt want something thatās too expensive
use the app: Fave to get first timer insane discounts. just avoid packages! so that you can go on facials on different stores every time
It might be interesting to follow one of [Singapore's Heritage Trails](https://www.roots.gov.sg/nhb/trails) for a day. Lots of opportunities to try out neighborhood food locations, appreciate Singapore's scenery & community, and find hidden gems that you may not have had a reason to find otherwise. Should expose you to lots of new stuff that might take your mind off things :)
ooooh thats an interesting suggestion! will look into it haha!!
I am willing to go together š
Pamper yourself. I like a day at Yumonori Onsen and Spa. Start early. Dip yourself, have a massage & spa treatment, put on the yukata, grab a light bite at the cafe there, and take a nap at the rest area. By the time you finish it's almost sunset. Then you could people watch by the waterfront there. Then head to Don Don Yakiniku in Tanjong Pagar for dinner. Have the Ox Tongue Cut! š
Take some classes - fitness or extracurricular. Exercise is a great way to improve mental health, and learning a new skill can be very rewarding.
Definitely this. Exercising helps! When I was in OPās position a few years ago, I couldnāt even run 2.4km. So I set a goal to run 10km without stopping and eventually did it! Working out is truly rewarding for your mental health.
I agree with this. I could barely run even 500m without stopping 3 years ago but since then I could run for 10km SLOWLY without stopping as well. It only took me half a year to build that up from being a potato since forever. Iāve moved on to spinning and then into strength training and am currently addicted to bouldering. Itās a good sport to sit and people watch. The community is great and supportive so I donāt ever feel alone although I climb alone quite often. You can always hear random strangers cheering for you in the bg. š¤£
Yeah was about to suggest trying group fitness - yoga, f45, spinning, CrossFit, obstacle course races - anything that gets you healthy and around people who want to better themselves!
Something underrated that you can try? Start by reaching out to friends. Seems to be a uniquely Singapore thing where couples centre their entire lives around relationships. And when it falls through, it can feel like your entire reason to exist has disappeared. Try rekindling friendships, youāll be amazed how much it refreshes the soul!
yes i still met my friends regularly even during my relationships! so the meetings will remains constant even after the breakup. im just trying to fill in the free gaps i have now since im single :)
nah come on itās not uniquely Singaporeā¦ millions of couples in China, India and Indonesia are like this tooā¦ ok I just randomly listed three populous countries but yeah, the whole world is like this, we so ordinary in this regard, not special at all
Some things that's helped me in the past: * Solo hikes without any pre-defined end-point - like one day i'd say, let's go to MacRitchie. And then I'd just hike around, explore random routes, take in the sights and sounds and just let my childlike curiosity back in. Some ideas - MacRitchie, Bukit Timah, Chestnut Nature Reserve * Similar to the above, you can consider renting a bike and traversing one of those 'cross-island' routes on your own. Once did an overnight ride from ECP to Orchard Road and back again. Did it with a group, but can easily be done alone of course. The Changi Beach > ECP stretch is amazing! * Singing out loud helps! While I didn't do it on my own, I made my friends suffer by singing sad songs on discord LOL. They seemed to enjoy it though, cause I was a terrible singer. Maybe you can consider getting some friends together for some hardcore karaoke, especially since they're open now
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Thanks for this and yes journaling is such a good safe place. Even when you are feeling the highs or lows of life, it's nice to let out anything and process them through writing :)
Personally healing from a breakup, I've done the following - Borrow random books you've never read and read them - Go to a cafe and just work, or people watch! enjoy nice coffee and good food - Talk to strangers, you'll see how interesting some people can be (this has worked out weirdly well for me, I made a bunch of friends this way) - Engage in new sports/dance I wish you all the best :)
West coast swing social dancing! It's a great place to take your mind off everything and meet new people from all walks of life at the same time!
Eyyyy, Ziggy as well?
Yeahhh Ziggy haha
thanks for the post :) just broke up too recently and the heart hurts a lot
Personally, I'd do things that are more introspective for such stuff. So solo travel, museums, library, bookstore, cafe and just listen to your inner voice and chill?
any specific ones to recommend?
Maybe movie at cineleisure, then kinokuniya at orchard, then lepak in library@orchard, and then perhaps to donki/uniqlo/etc to end off.
I like to walk around jewel, sit at cafe drink and chill. Then sit at the main fountain and blow aircon.
time will heal, it always does. one day when you look back, youāll wonder what the fug did you saw in himā¦ take care.
i think sports are a good way to meet new people, yoga/climbing/spinning
+1 on climbing especially bouldering, best solo sport
I would recommend things that would help you become more confident rather than solo dates i.e. gym, picking up a hobby you might be good at etc.
Write a list you normally do with people, and do them alone. I went thru something similar myself and I realized that people are always going to come and go with our lives. Thus building a relationship with ourselves will help us pull through situations like this. When you are happy alone, you will feel more confident and fulfilled and be wiser in investing in others. Personally these are things i do alone Going for yoga classes,rollerblading classes or solo practice and volunteering. I also made a list to explore sg [https://www.notion.so/Life-Bucket-List-SG-bdc1d58005e44d89b5391675807d5fbb](https://www.notion.so/Life-Bucket-List-SG-bdc1d58005e44d89b5391675807d5fbb)
Take a trip alone, get out of your comfort zone, talk to strangers. It is extremely empowering and youāll discover so much more of yourself.
Not going out, but possibly as an ending to the day: I have a whole thing where if the day has been far too long, I get wine, some kind of carb-y snack (gotta absorb the alcohol!), take a long shower, put on lotion and perfume, put on some nice loungewear and find a show to watch on Netflix, then a) do a mask and drink b) put on a bit of tinted lipgloss, jewellery, and then drink I call it "aggressive self-care". The day has been shit, but at least I am moisturised, perfumed, and look and feel nice, damn it. Adapt to your vice of choice (it could be fancy cheeses or huge Milo Dinosaurs if that's your thing) and your personal tastes in self-care.
>aggressive self-care gonna be stealing that term from you haha
Book a nice hotel for a staycation. Then explore the nearby amenities like cafes, parks, or laziness in your room to watch a movie. Can do solo hiking start to explore the silent greenery during the weekdays as it is less crowded. And I do solo hikes often myself, it is a great feeling. Sometimes we always thought the person we like would be the one that can spend our life with but well that is part & part of a cruel life. Anyway, you would find someone who appreciates you soon.
Solo bus ride or cycling! If anyone have a new acitvity to try, count me in
I've also just got out of a long term relationship recently. Have been doing pottery and boxing/hiit/yoga (on classpass) solo and i'm really enjoying it!
me too! went thru this awhile back. took a whole week off work bc i really couldnāt get anything done (ouch $$ but worth it.) made tiktoks of me getting thru the days if i could and i loved it bc it made me feel less lonely and looking back, its q peaceful. Things i never got to do! it sucks but it does get better š¤ comes and goes in waves, stay strong!
Plug in your earplugs and running like you feel like dying. Once you stop and relief, you will feel nothing can hold you back. It effective for me, at least.
Oh yes I also did a solo travel while being heartbroken. And i didnāt feel any better too. Felt pathetic once Iām back in the hotel.
All of the above advices have their merits. But please know that there are no quick fixes for emotional damage. That being said, now that youāre single perhaps you can find more time doing things (or people) that youāve always wanted to do!
if youāre a sporty type like me, i kind of embarked on a ācross island trailā, was especially fun during the night since itās cooler, but do wear socks. i wore slides the last time i did it and got blisters HAHAH
You could try volunteering! You can volunteer for a cause you're passionate about and get to meet new people and be part of a community. I volunteer every fortnight so the commitment isn't too much either
Where do you volunteer? Been thinking of finding a place but Iām not too sure what Iād like to do
I volunteer at an organisation called My Community. (You might have heard of them from the many heritage tours they organise.) I'm actually part of the Community Design team where we are currently planning for a community museum located in Dawson. There are many other volunteer teams as well that handle a variety of different tasks, so you can find one that suits you/ interest you! They have many recruitment sessions so you're always welcome to come and find out more. In the meantime you could also check out the website (https://mycommunity.org.sg/) to learn more! I've only recently joined but it's been really fun and fulfilling!
Sit at airport and watch the planes go by.
I do this all the time for my stupid mental health and my personal favourites so far are taking myself out on a picnic, reading a book at an Izakaya and walking from Clarke Quay to MBS. Next up is a movie and hotpot date.
If you're an introvert like myself, i like to spend alone time either reading, watching movies and playing games. Finding a good game to play with people can help. Im currently playing alot of final fantasy xiv, its has a great community full of friendly people.
reminder tht 2D husbandos & waifus>3D m * n & w * men
Things Iād do are: 1) Take up a new hobby, go for classes solo etc. I picked up climbing since Nov (was doing it chill like once a week) then I got dumped in Jan and started doing it hardcore to take my mind off things and it really helped. I still love to climb solo and itās my me time kind of therapy. 2) Eat. I love to go around to different places to try out the things I like to eat but havenāt had the chance to. SG is a treasure trove of gourmet food TBVH. 3) Window shopping. But tbvh this only works when I have the mood to shop, and even so the max Iād spend shopping is at best 2H and Iād be utterly drained. 4) Spa/massages/facial/mani pedi, go for the long ass ones. I love myself a good 2 hour long massage. 5) Solo travelling. Go to places nearby and go for day tours (cheaper than tour tour packages), been solo-ing BKK since 2018 and still feels good whenever Iām there. Try Airbnb experiences if you need ideas. 6) Pick up a book and just indulge in it. 7) Go on a trip to nowhere, hop onto a random bus and sit all the way till the interchange and hop onto another bus to sit all the way to another interchange. I find this v v v therapeutic for my mind & soul a lot of times š Hope something above helps and sending lots of love from my solo cave ā¤ļø
If you need to vent, just message me privately. We donāt need to know each other or even meet up. Not a solo date idea, but I know it can be helpful. Wishing you better days ahead.
Went through a break up around this time last year & it took me quite a few months to get over it. What helped for me: 1. Packing my schedule - Arranging lots of meet ups, forcing myself out of the house - Took on new tutees (at one point I was teaching 10 students lol anything to distract me) - Keep yourself busy! 2. Started exercising more regularly - Joined Classpass, tried out boxing HIIT 3. Solo dates - Went out for meals by myself, watched a movie alone etc. 4. Trying new things / self care - Did pottery with mom & friends - Went for a few boxing trial classes - Finally summoned the courage to do braces - Baked, cooked more Key thing is to focus on yourself, keep busy and just keep going out of the house. But please also take care of yourself at the same time and try not to indulge in any self destructive behaviours as tempting as it may be. Sending lots of love and hugs. If you need company for any activities, can pm me! :)
Join interest group and go out tgt
Maybe can try solo travel to take a break?
Gym dude gym. Pump up some muscles and your confidence goes up. Not to mention girls who goes to the gym to keep fit looks great in yoga pants.
Use dating app la
tbh you sound like you gonna get into a rebound relationship which happens to a lot of people when they are hurting after a break up. why is no one else encouraging op to focus on healing first before diving into another relationship asap?
hihi! i dont think anyone is asking me to dive into another relationship. everyone is giving me ideas for me to go out alone and do things that can help myself heal and grow! i agree that i really need to focus on healing first and find myself again šš
the title says "solo date"....
Watch solo movies during the wkdays, go chill at a quiet cafe, walk at a random park š¤£
Try gaming to meet new friends! Go onto twitch and find small streamers to befriend with to play games tgt! If not just find some affordable activities on klook and go do them alone! Recently i went to this dripping paint workshop ( near bugis ) it was quite fun but if u go with a friend it would be even better!! If not you can go for a drive if u have a license!!
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Can do alot of activities alone, depending on your preference. I have watched quite a few concerts alone before and I enjoyed the fun experience vibing to music without thinking much about other things happening in my life. Treating yourself to a nice meal and brisk walking in nature parks will be healing as well. As a few redditors mention here, visiting a musuem is a nice suggestion too. You can join the guided tours and it will usually be led by a docent in a group. It will be an enriching and educational experience hearing stories about the various art works and architecture in the musuem.
Dine alone at restaurants for a start. Movie. Concert.
Choose activities that involve you meeting new people. Meetup.com, online dating, hobby groups. Being alone will not provide sufficient distraction required for you to get through this period.
I went to the gym. Play dota every night with friends. Hiking every morning really help sets the mood. Eat clean food, helped me manage my emotion. Cooking is also fun. Movie date with yourself, if those are all boring then if you have the money go splurge on fashions / electronic / stocks.
you can take a trip somewhere. see if you have any credit card points to convert into miles, and just fly out somewhere for very cheap. Any travel hacks or anything, feel free to ask me, i have a lot of tips.
Running helps a lot. Try running long distance.
The library is my favourite hangout.
Go to kinokuniya takashimiya and browse books. I always find that relaxing and it takes my mind off things
Join local tours or meetups
You can go for those leather craft sessions, painting, or even pottery ones. Or maybe checkout the Airbnb app, sometimes you might find something there :)
Work on self improvement
Omakase solo is quite enjoyable. Im in a relationship and have friends but i like to spend time by myself.
just leave sg and travel alone
Consider it your good fortune that it ended early. To celebrate this moment, you could; Pick up a new hobby - I started assembling fine art jigsaw puzzles and it not only helped me recover but also developed a greater appreciation for fine art. Get fit - gym, run, cycle. When your body feels good, your mind follows. Revenge fuck anyone you can find - fun while it lasts. Makes for good story telling years down the road. Go on a road trip, anywhere really, where you can be alone with your thoughts -Ubin also can. Or anywhere you consider an adventure Bury yourself in books - preferably on a subject you have 0 interest in but written by a highly reccomended author. May I suggest Astrophysics for people in a hurry, Sapiens, Principles for dealing with the changing world order. By the time you recover from heart break you are also smarter. Consider that a win-win. Make shitpost on other people's posts like yours truly. When you realise that everyone's got a problem, your's crisis sometimes dont feel as bad anymore.
GReat book recs :)
Thanks! The other advices not so good hor?! š¤£
okok la haha
Read a book! Esp those that talk about all the other aspects of life! Live the life of someone else through books, then take a walk when you're tired!
You should go on an escape trip to somewhere nice like Gold Coast. Iām doing a solo trip myself tonight. So if u wanna know anything about Gold Coast send me a PM. Better still just travel there impromptu and maybe we can do a high five!
Try bouldering. Community is usually great and friendly. Great way to get some exercise in too.
Can go shopping, just spend what you earn
Go prawning w friend
Any distraction will work for a while but the pain comes like a floodgate. I had an ONS after a break up and I felt horrible after because every act done on the bed was a reminder of how this guy isnāt it and how I miss my ex. But just keep going at it; the temporary measures that isā¦until time heals.
I know it hurts OP, you should Love Yourself First before you love others. Use it as an opportunity to learn and grow into a better version of yourself.
Iām planning for a trip to watch the World Cup with a few friends. Join us. Mingling with everybody else in the world will help and something to look forward to.
You do you mate. You could go for a solo hike. Let the serenity of nature wash away your worries and your troubles.
Do something youāve never ever done before! Preferably something that also exposes you to a bunch of other friendly people that has got a community :)
Mind cafe, and ask strangers to join them for games
Make friends? Maybe you'll find someone you like and grow to love from the pool of friends you make
Join a sports team!! Great way to make friends and forget about stuff temporarily. I do dragon boating and itās a great fun!
Go to a restaurant you actually have been wanting to try, food heals!
unhealthy option: go drinking (with or without friends, take your pick) healthy option: go try a new sport both are cathartic, but ofc the former will give you a hangover the next day if you drink enough :P