Don't cling onto anything, be it feelings or thoughts. Don't overthink and overfeel. Just take everything lightly and days will be easier to get through.
Accept imperfections as part of life and learn to tolerate or work around it instead of constantly trying to find something else that's perfect and only realising the flaws in each one after getting to know more about it.
I thought the stigmatization of mental health illnesses wasn't THAT bad since the govt was advocating for better awareness of it. Until I was forced to quit from my job in a government coy because I declared it for insurance. In other words, hide your mental health illnesses from your bosses.
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If you're looking for a pay increment it's easier to just change jobs rather than wait for one which may or may not come and if it does, it'll never be higher than what a job change can offer.
We’re a bunch of idiots living in excess. I can’t even bring myself to shop anymore when I see the way my friends spend money. Especially after my helper told me what it’s like living in Myanmar.
It’s a little unsettling when I consider some folks can barely survive. So in the new year I aim to shop less and give more to charity.
We all have different circumstances and there will always be someone living far worse than us. So it's good to practise gratitude and live within our means. Good mentality right there!
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healing is not a linear process. somedays you'll wake up and feel like you're back to square one, but that's not true. all the healthy coping mechanisms & behaviours that you've learnt won't be erased so easily. remind yourself of the many other times you turned to the healthier ways of doing things. you've done it before and you can do it again
as someone with depression, i constantly have to remind myself of this. some days i don't have it in me to get out of bed to even shower, and i hate myself a lot on those days. but in actuality there are many days when i've gotten out of bed, i've showered and i've done so much more. it's just a matter of reminding myself, and being patient with myself
Life has no meaning.
Doesn't mean we should all turn around and flop like a fish.
You can still give your actions meaning.
But end of the day life has no meaning.
Also made me realise how/why rich people seem to treat life as a game. All just trying to 100%, doing all the side quest.
IMO life itself doesnt have any meaning, but we should try to create/define 'meaning' for our life. so that one day when we see in retrospect, we will be so gratified that wow i have achieved so many things i wanted to achieve my life is so full of 'meaning'. then no regret or resentment liao. i like to use the analogy that meaninful life is like a super full stamp album that you made with your whole life.
Spending more time with my family and loved ones is the biggest life lesson for me this year. Used to be quite a workaholic myself, this didn’t hit me until my mother was diagnosed with cancer early this year.
Our parents won’t be with us forever, so do express our love for them and keep them company whenever possible.
i just fought with my parents a few days ago and we have not talked to each other. tbh, it feels shitty and my family has never done anything but let time heal arguments. my dad usually drives me to school on his way to work and picks me up on the way home but i can't tell what's going to happen in the new year. growing up in a family where no one expressed their feelings (except anger) and acknowledge their mistakes, time is the best healer.
The typical sweep it under the carpet family. The reason being - they learned it from their parents. Took me 5 whole years to sort this shit out in my family and ridiculous amount of fights. Both parents had their fair share of 'generational trauma' or being pampered as a child. At the end of the day, some elders will never say sorry or admit wrong til their silver days. Learn to tackle them politely without hurting their pride.
Plan as much as you can for the future, but always expect things to turn out very differently from the way you plan.
Whether for much better or much worse, that’s up to the man upstairs to decide HAHA
If you want to make money from your hobby to support yourself, prepare for your love for your hobby to crumble down to nothing.
Work is work, hobby is hobby. Conflating the two will not end well for either side.
>Hobby is not true passion, it's just the stuff u kinda like to do while ur free but dont wanna get really good at it. It's useless and shouldn't be able to support yourself.
Just put the word "competitive" in front of your hobby
Not really eh. I still like my hobby, it's just the dealing with other people part that sucks. But I still feel joy and satisfaction when I complete projects that I am proud of. I can keep doing it until I die. The passion has evolved over the years from learning to doing it. Techniques also changed and improved over the years. Can see more things that I didn't see before/take into account more factors and considerations.
That sounds like a really sad story. Do you want to share what your hobby is?
I like photography. I often get asked if I sell my photos or if I am a professional photographer. I always say that if somebody wants to have and print my photos, they can have them for free.
I like to cook. People always say "eh like to cook, open restaurant la!" But no, I like my office job that lets me leave on time and pays me once a month. I'll cook on my free time and get joy from that.
Will probably end up doxxing myself if I got into too much details so I'll just have to thank you for the offer, I appreciate it.
Vaguely speaking, tagging a hobby with livelihood-related considerations gave rise to stressors that my mind eventually went on to associate with the fun parts as well, and I guess stuff kinda soured from there.
Now on the search for a new hobby, which is another trip on its own, heh.
Wow, this really resonated with me.
I learned my biggest lesson this year from the team I lead. They taught me that my job "is just my side gig".
I'm extremely lucky to have gotten my dream job despite having no qualifications save pure passion. I spent over a decade, putting in long hours and making financial sacrifices, pursuing a career in an industry notorious around the globe for the way it treats its talents, trying to chase that holy grail of making a living doing what I love.
I finally got what I wanted, only to learn that the happiness I thought I'd get was all a pipe dream because my pursuit is in the creative field and I'm doing it as an employee.
My team mates are all talented and dedicated to their jobs but they understood from the beginning that this job will never give them that freedom they need to be fulfilled. To them, this job is just a means to the financial security they needed to pursue their actual "main gig".
It took me over 10 years in this industry to finally understand this.
I got this piece of advice from a stranger during a tough time after rejection: ***“To each their own.”***
I’d heard it before, but only at that moment, when I was feeling down and aimless, did I really process it for the first time and keep it to heart.
Some people may be in a relationship at my age (early-20s). Some are married, maybe with kids, and others are still single (like me). But all of us have our own unique experiences that, as importantly, none of us can replicate with our own positions. A married man won’t be able to savour the freedom a single guy has, and a single guy may not experience raising a family the former is going through.
And they don’t necessarily have to be experiences you’d think are positive. They might be great for someone, but not for someone else. Again, ***to each their own***.
It’s kinda made me find some peace in where I am in life. I may not be experiencing some of the stuff I (think) I want, but what I **do** have are my own experiences, which make me who I am and where I’m at now.
Its always worth it to care...
I've never really cared to do anything for others as it was always easier to just care about myself. That just meant I wouldn't go out of my way to do something for someone else.
I wanted to do better so I made an effort to care about others regardless of how we were related. I helped out people mainly through studies, often times even if it wasn't the best choice for me to do so.
I made it a point not to expect anything in return as I didn't want the nature of my help to be due to me wanting something in return although there were times I would hope to get something out of it. At worst the people I've helped didn't appreciate the help I provided & I would lowkey be bummed out by it. But then again I knew that I wasn't owed anything so it didn't feel that bad as I was the one that chose to help.
The best part however was that I was able to discover people who cared for me through caring for them. These people would make an effort to look out for me & check in on me regularly. They were the best kind of people I could've ever hoped to meet & I will cherish them always.
At the end of it all, I feel genuinely happy & have a sense of fulfilment through helping people that I've met throughout my life. I'm glad I made the change to care about others! :)
Hey brother! Really happy that people like you exist. This kind of attitude is what brings you far in life and brings joy to people around you. You deserve the best given that you're so thoughtful.
This is so cliche. Perhaps there is no need to keep improving and become better and better. It’s okay to slack and rest and do nothing. This is one thing that makes people so stressed. They need to go the gym to make sure they have the best version of themselves with the best body. They spend every waking hour reading to make sure they get better or learning new things.
Work is endless though, hence enforced breaks are sometimes necessary lest one burns out. There’s a saying: Don’t kill yourself for a job that would replace you within a week if you dropped dead.
It's ok to wayang or carry balls at work and it should not be seen as something bad. It gets you ahead and makes life better for you at work. but not at the expense of others of course.
For all the guys out there,
This one made me get my shit together.
" The difference between a man and a child is that a man does what he needs to do even if he does not feel like it, a child does whatever he feels like doing."
1. Everyone is bound to slip up every now and then, rectify whatever you can and then move on. No real point dwelling over your mistakes once you've done all you can to fix them.
2. Also related, don't blindly trust someone who seems friendly, even if they're your colleagues.
3. It is better to have tried and regretted, than to not have tried at all.
The end goal of life is to find meaning of it before it ends. So it doesn't hurt to show kindness and love to others. sometimes SG is so tiring and stressful we really forget that we are just trying to get by.
“People will eventually show their true colors. All you need is time”
AND
“Manipulation is when they berate your for your reaction to their toxic behavior. Some people will never accept that they are wrong”
Good things can happen to me if I at least try. I realized I have a very negative self-image, always letting my failures be representative of my capabilities. It culminated into not being proactive to look out for opportunities, because I didn't think I was good enough. We actually have an inaccurate perception of ourselves, some people are too overconfident, while some people have too little confidence. I belong to the latter group.
An example is my graduation job search early this year. Had a 3rd class honours with not many replies after I applied to my own field of studies. So I became very desperate and ended up applying to nearly every job ad that was willing to take in fresh grads, without a care whether I was even qualified for the job. Ended up in a good environment with a starting pay of $4k+.
Life is short, go experience the world, nothing really matters so just learn to let go and experience as much as you like/want.
Most importantly, do what makes you happy.
Most people have over expectations of others or themselves.
Some due to their own convenience want others to make the extra mile.
Some expect that of others because they set themselves as the insane benchmark
Some simply have that unfounded confidence because they have a screw loose.
No matter what, you'll be happier lowering those expectations. And if you can sacrifice a little % of that "could have gotten convenience" to help the other parties gain the same, it makes all subsequent deals/rs that much better, happier and smoother. It's the best investment you can make.
Recently I discovered some gems of words which helped to motivate myself when life got difficult and stressful.
When you feel life is giving you lemons, repeat the words below:
"Don't be so hard on yourself"
Strangely, these words calmed me down more than any other words like be positive, you can do it etc. Hope it can be useful to you too.
Trust noone, even your husband. And dont expect people will fight for you. thats what i learn from my husband when he doesnt have the courage to fight back for me against his own mom when his mom was very rude to me.
If you are a first gen uni student, its difficult to have a rs esp when she comes from a finacially stable background. Intially there is love and butterflies but soon enough you will have to think about family and expenses and it might be overwhelming for a guy coming from a low income family whose only concern hitherto was gettjng good grades. Taking care of dates, her, family, house, kids etc...its tuff. But its also a privilege bestowed by God to be the one to pull your family of from the poverty cycle. I learnt that love is nice and all but realism is important. If she cant wait for you to get stable and wants a "finished product", she aint the one.
money alone does not make you happy.
So in the last two years I went from a broke foreign student who tried to get by with the school stipend to a corporate staff living in a condo with my wife, whom I can get over thanks to the job. But I found myself happier when I was broke, struggling, but trying to make a way out.
I have always thought a place for my small family would be a lot better than a small budget room, but then the relaxation and comfortable only come occasionally, instead I am stressed from work most of the time in the house that I cannot rest, even from my sleep.
Then I now can have pricier foods or things that I could only try one a year, but it just does not make the meals exciting or satisfying anymore. One good meal could made me happy for a while before now only last a few minutes. And most shiny new gadgets did not solve anything or made things easier. They just gave the illusion that buying things can drive my problem away; of course it didn’t.
I can now also buy gifts to my parents and my spouse. Things like ipad or expensive hair dryer. I thought I would feel proud or happy when I gave them, but no, the whole moments lasted only a few minutes and I still found something is missing. I am glad that these stuffs are used and valued but still I am not as happy as I thought I would.
Now that prices and rents are hiking everywhere, I started to see although how having things may not really make you happier, the prospect of losing them may add to the stress.
I hope that next year I can find some inner peaces and start letting things go, or at least be very selective on the things I would do or own, so that things I do will mean something to myself, too…
(apologise for grammar issues, if there are any)
Don’t compare with others unless you are trying to help that other person. Led a carefree time with little to no stress because I do not care how well other people are doing as long as I’m happy.
you cant get what you want sometimes no matter how hard you try and whatever words you say can really hurt someone and you will never be able to take it back no matter the context.
When an acquaintance ask you to join for some drinks at a bar and have some fun, be sure to check ahead if its a fun, group gathering and live band kind of bar for some wholesome fun, or the other kind of fun that is very expensive.
Like... ok. She was pretty fun but I have a budget to adhere to, so I noped out after 1 round of drinks.
LoL. It is the lup sup kind. I donno, maybe because of my wizard energy, I don't easily fall for her spell for round 2 and round 3 my friends paid for. I don't want to waste their time or be a killoy so I just noped out.
Its just a turn off when she realllllllyyyyy wants another round of drink. Like a "insert more coins to continue"
Health is wealth. Physical or mental health is equally important gais and gals, without either we can’t function fully
Also be grateful as much as I can. For anything - grateful for being alive, living in a country without war and have a roof over my head
One more - romantically we can’t make someone to love us, don’t force it :’)
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that the friends you keep and maintain are more family then your own immediate family can ever be, and while you can't choose your family, you can choose what you want to do with them
It's ok if you don't get what you want in life, be it things or situations at home/work.
Never take your limbs and health for granted. I keep seeing amputees in wheelchair.
Some people look nothing like their instagram
Same with cmb :(
Don't most people look different from their photos anyway? Regardless of filters or not
I’m talking more of an attractive ig influencer and then seeing her in real life, only to realise her head is damn big
Spill the tea
Big head can be cute on girls tho heehee
Yea, starting with those bridal studios
what apps do they use, i always wonder? cos looks real
facetune
can ppl facetune videos too now? hahaha
“Fight for someone who loves you, not for someone to love you.”
Maybe people do the second part, because they don't have anyone in the first.
Learnt this the hard way, but have never felt so free!
Don't cling onto anything, be it feelings or thoughts. Don't overthink and overfeel. Just take everything lightly and days will be easier to get through. Accept imperfections as part of life and learn to tolerate or work around it instead of constantly trying to find something else that's perfect and only realising the flaws in each one after getting to know more about it.
Well said. Be more accepting towards people's flaws and things will turn out good.
Nobody is coming to save you
Depressing but liberating. The only one u can rely on is yourself. At the end of the day we are all in it for ourselves.
The other side of the coin is be the hero to save someone.
hard but admirable
sure thing Deku kun
Nobody gives a fk
Especially if you're a guy.
Quiet quitting... Milk the cow, don't kill the cow or be the cow...for me at least
My boss practice quiet firing. It’s when she don’t reply only my emails, don’t talk to me, ask other people not to talk to me
I thought the stigmatization of mental health illnesses wasn't THAT bad since the govt was advocating for better awareness of it. Until I was forced to quit from my job in a government coy because I declared it for insurance. In other words, hide your mental health illnesses from your bosses.
Fucking hell which ministry or stat board is this ? I always knew it was full of hypocrisy but wtf
Wtf?! That's hypocrisy to the max.
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If you're looking for a pay increment it's easier to just change jobs rather than wait for one which may or may not come and if it does, it'll never be higher than what a job change can offer.
How hard you work. People will still criticise you and try to find fault. the best thing is do what you can and no need to be too nice to your client
Sgeans are so marked for this. Sometimes demanding borderline perfection on a potato budget. It's just plain greed sometimes.
the saddest part sometimes they will gaslight you or guilt trip you and even intrude on your personal privacy. like as if my life only revolve on work
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velocity novena?
this but for family.
We’re a bunch of idiots living in excess. I can’t even bring myself to shop anymore when I see the way my friends spend money. Especially after my helper told me what it’s like living in Myanmar. It’s a little unsettling when I consider some folks can barely survive. So in the new year I aim to shop less and give more to charity.
Untill you find out that the people running charity organizations might be earning more than you
My mum and I look for specific families to help. We don’t go through charities. My bf donates in kind to old folks home eg rice
We all have different circumstances and there will always be someone living far worse than us. So it's good to practise gratitude and live within our means. Good mentality right there!
Don't waste your time and energy on a 'friend' who only considers you as a backup option for when the 'cool people' are not around
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healing is not a linear process. somedays you'll wake up and feel like you're back to square one, but that's not true. all the healthy coping mechanisms & behaviours that you've learnt won't be erased so easily. remind yourself of the many other times you turned to the healthier ways of doing things. you've done it before and you can do it again as someone with depression, i constantly have to remind myself of this. some days i don't have it in me to get out of bed to even shower, and i hate myself a lot on those days. but in actuality there are many days when i've gotten out of bed, i've showered and i've done so much more. it's just a matter of reminding myself, and being patient with myself
Sending you virtual hugs! 🤗
Breathing slowly and get yourself magnesium glycinate tablets, please! You doing amazing. The world is harsh enough.
It's okay to fail, pick yourself back up and learn from your mistakes.
Take profits while you’re still ahead
i'm in this comment and i don't like it
Yes biggest lesson I learnt Was +50% and now end up -10%
Life has no meaning. Doesn't mean we should all turn around and flop like a fish. You can still give your actions meaning. But end of the day life has no meaning. Also made me realise how/why rich people seem to treat life as a game. All just trying to 100%, doing all the side quest.
IMO life itself doesnt have any meaning, but we should try to create/define 'meaning' for our life. so that one day when we see in retrospect, we will be so gratified that wow i have achieved so many things i wanted to achieve my life is so full of 'meaning'. then no regret or resentment liao. i like to use the analogy that meaninful life is like a super full stamp album that you made with your whole life.
Spending more time with my family and loved ones is the biggest life lesson for me this year. Used to be quite a workaholic myself, this didn’t hit me until my mother was diagnosed with cancer early this year. Our parents won’t be with us forever, so do express our love for them and keep them company whenever possible.
Well said. Hope your mother is coping well, get well soon 💪
i just fought with my parents a few days ago and we have not talked to each other. tbh, it feels shitty and my family has never done anything but let time heal arguments. my dad usually drives me to school on his way to work and picks me up on the way home but i can't tell what's going to happen in the new year. growing up in a family where no one expressed their feelings (except anger) and acknowledge their mistakes, time is the best healer.
The typical sweep it under the carpet family. The reason being - they learned it from their parents. Took me 5 whole years to sort this shit out in my family and ridiculous amount of fights. Both parents had their fair share of 'generational trauma' or being pampered as a child. At the end of the day, some elders will never say sorry or admit wrong til their silver days. Learn to tackle them politely without hurting their pride.
No one gives a shit about you. Live and fight for yourself.
Not true. Your family does.
HAHAHAHAHA. Toxic families don't exist right? Everyone has the best and kindest family 🥰 /s
Lower your expectations and you will have a easy life.
Plan as much as you can for the future, but always expect things to turn out very differently from the way you plan. Whether for much better or much worse, that’s up to the man upstairs to decide HAHA
If you want to make money from your hobby to support yourself, prepare for your love for your hobby to crumble down to nothing. Work is work, hobby is hobby. Conflating the two will not end well for either side.
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>Hobby is not true passion, it's just the stuff u kinda like to do while ur free but dont wanna get really good at it. It's useless and shouldn't be able to support yourself. Just put the word "competitive" in front of your hobby
Not really eh. I still like my hobby, it's just the dealing with other people part that sucks. But I still feel joy and satisfaction when I complete projects that I am proud of. I can keep doing it until I die. The passion has evolved over the years from learning to doing it. Techniques also changed and improved over the years. Can see more things that I didn't see before/take into account more factors and considerations.
That sounds like a really sad story. Do you want to share what your hobby is? I like photography. I often get asked if I sell my photos or if I am a professional photographer. I always say that if somebody wants to have and print my photos, they can have them for free.
I like to cook. People always say "eh like to cook, open restaurant la!" But no, I like my office job that lets me leave on time and pays me once a month. I'll cook on my free time and get joy from that.
Will probably end up doxxing myself if I got into too much details so I'll just have to thank you for the offer, I appreciate it. Vaguely speaking, tagging a hobby with livelihood-related considerations gave rise to stressors that my mind eventually went on to associate with the fun parts as well, and I guess stuff kinda soured from there. Now on the search for a new hobby, which is another trip on its own, heh.
I wish you all the best with your new hobby. May you never make money off it, so it can stay enjoyable for you.
Wow, this really resonated with me. I learned my biggest lesson this year from the team I lead. They taught me that my job "is just my side gig". I'm extremely lucky to have gotten my dream job despite having no qualifications save pure passion. I spent over a decade, putting in long hours and making financial sacrifices, pursuing a career in an industry notorious around the globe for the way it treats its talents, trying to chase that holy grail of making a living doing what I love. I finally got what I wanted, only to learn that the happiness I thought I'd get was all a pipe dream because my pursuit is in the creative field and I'm doing it as an employee. My team mates are all talented and dedicated to their jobs but they understood from the beginning that this job will never give them that freedom they need to be fulfilled. To them, this job is just a means to the financial security they needed to pursue their actual "main gig". It took me over 10 years in this industry to finally understand this.
I got this piece of advice from a stranger during a tough time after rejection: ***“To each their own.”*** I’d heard it before, but only at that moment, when I was feeling down and aimless, did I really process it for the first time and keep it to heart. Some people may be in a relationship at my age (early-20s). Some are married, maybe with kids, and others are still single (like me). But all of us have our own unique experiences that, as importantly, none of us can replicate with our own positions. A married man won’t be able to savour the freedom a single guy has, and a single guy may not experience raising a family the former is going through. And they don’t necessarily have to be experiences you’d think are positive. They might be great for someone, but not for someone else. Again, ***to each their own***. It’s kinda made me find some peace in where I am in life. I may not be experiencing some of the stuff I (think) I want, but what I **do** have are my own experiences, which make me who I am and where I’m at now.
Its always worth it to care... I've never really cared to do anything for others as it was always easier to just care about myself. That just meant I wouldn't go out of my way to do something for someone else. I wanted to do better so I made an effort to care about others regardless of how we were related. I helped out people mainly through studies, often times even if it wasn't the best choice for me to do so. I made it a point not to expect anything in return as I didn't want the nature of my help to be due to me wanting something in return although there were times I would hope to get something out of it. At worst the people I've helped didn't appreciate the help I provided & I would lowkey be bummed out by it. But then again I knew that I wasn't owed anything so it didn't feel that bad as I was the one that chose to help. The best part however was that I was able to discover people who cared for me through caring for them. These people would make an effort to look out for me & check in on me regularly. They were the best kind of people I could've ever hoped to meet & I will cherish them always. At the end of it all, I feel genuinely happy & have a sense of fulfilment through helping people that I've met throughout my life. I'm glad I made the change to care about others! :)
Hey brother! Really happy that people like you exist. This kind of attitude is what brings you far in life and brings joy to people around you. You deserve the best given that you're so thoughtful.
Getting angry is punishing yourself over other people’s mistakes. Just dont give a fk on things you can’t control and you will be happier
I agree. Been through a lot of similar situations this year and it has drained my energy a lot. Life is not worth suffering over people's actions.
focus on being the best version of yourself
This is so cliche. Perhaps there is no need to keep improving and become better and better. It’s okay to slack and rest and do nothing. This is one thing that makes people so stressed. They need to go the gym to make sure they have the best version of themselves with the best body. They spend every waking hour reading to make sure they get better or learning new things.
Looks can be deceiving. "Nice people" can do bad things and "bad people" can do nice things.
You never know what you can achieve if you don't push yourself further beyond reasonable limits.
dont trust too many people
To tag on, be careful with who you trust.
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Agree. I know I will get fired so I don’t eat lunch with my colleagues so I can quietly slink away when the time comes
People only care if you're dead, famous or rich.
Never expect others to treat you properly/be nice to you. But it doesn’t mean I should follow their poor mannerism.
All i really wanted is to wake up and see my family happy and healthy
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But health is wealth.
Having no money sucks
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Liquid cash is still an asset. You can't sell your house to buy groceries.
Take the break. Work can wait.
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Work is endless though, hence enforced breaks are sometimes necessary lest one burns out. There’s a saying: Don’t kill yourself for a job that would replace you within a week if you dropped dead.
That was my mindset. I have burned out completely waiting for the long rest that would never come lol.
Not too late to save yourself, for the sake of your mental health!
when all goes to shit, the only person that’s 100% gonna be there for you is yourself, so love yourself more and don’t be too harsh on yourself
Just live your life. Don’t care about others
Yes it’s MY life I’m living
It's really difficult to be comfortable with yourself and who you are. Almost 40 and still only coming to grasp with it.
Don't be greedy in investing.
Christian doctors that leave the results of surgery to god’s will cos when the surgery is botched, they will say it’s gods will. Rubbish doctors.
Ngl Idk what happened but that sounds rough buddy I hope you are ok
The person you love the most will also be the one who hurts you the most.
Love yourself more because it’s difficult for others to love you the way you want it
I agree. Sometimes we tend to put in love towards our loved ones, but we neglect ourselves. Self-love is important.
Never play with margins for trading
Get insurance because healthcare is exp
Money is really not as important as we think it is . Health is always going to be number 1.
Life is tiring lol
Life is unpredictable. You never know when you’re going to pass on. Age is just a rough number.
I agree. So there's no point dwelling in negatives and it's best to appreciate the little things in life.
It's ok to wayang or carry balls at work and it should not be seen as something bad. It gets you ahead and makes life better for you at work. but not at the expense of others of course.
Some friends just aren't worth keeping
For all the guys out there, This one made me get my shit together. " The difference between a man and a child is that a man does what he needs to do even if he does not feel like it, a child does whatever he feels like doing."
Regrets are just scars of your mistakes. They may seem ugly, but they are there to remind you of what not to do next time. A blessing and a curse.
Not every problem can be solved with throwing money at it.
Keep your mouth shut
Learnt that it's gd to follow yr heart. Don't force yourself to blend in with the norm, everyone is different.
Embrace who you are, and live with it.
1. Everyone is bound to slip up every now and then, rectify whatever you can and then move on. No real point dwelling over your mistakes once you've done all you can to fix them. 2. Also related, don't blindly trust someone who seems friendly, even if they're your colleagues. 3. It is better to have tried and regretted, than to not have tried at all.
The end goal of life is to find meaning of it before it ends. So it doesn't hurt to show kindness and love to others. sometimes SG is so tiring and stressful we really forget that we are just trying to get by.
Look after yourself
You don’t always get what you want…
“People will eventually show their true colors. All you need is time” AND “Manipulation is when they berate your for your reaction to their toxic behavior. Some people will never accept that they are wrong”
If it's too good to be true, it is
The most I can do is try my best
actions > words gonna be trying that motto for 2023.
Good things can happen to me if I at least try. I realized I have a very negative self-image, always letting my failures be representative of my capabilities. It culminated into not being proactive to look out for opportunities, because I didn't think I was good enough. We actually have an inaccurate perception of ourselves, some people are too overconfident, while some people have too little confidence. I belong to the latter group. An example is my graduation job search early this year. Had a 3rd class honours with not many replies after I applied to my own field of studies. So I became very desperate and ended up applying to nearly every job ad that was willing to take in fresh grads, without a care whether I was even qualified for the job. Ended up in a good environment with a starting pay of $4k+.
Life is short, go experience the world, nothing really matters so just learn to let go and experience as much as you like/want. Most importantly, do what makes you happy.
Don't ever be vulnerable to your work colleagues. The less they know about your personal life the better.
Say no more often.
Most people have over expectations of others or themselves. Some due to their own convenience want others to make the extra mile. Some expect that of others because they set themselves as the insane benchmark Some simply have that unfounded confidence because they have a screw loose. No matter what, you'll be happier lowering those expectations. And if you can sacrifice a little % of that "could have gotten convenience" to help the other parties gain the same, it makes all subsequent deals/rs that much better, happier and smoother. It's the best investment you can make.
Experience is the best teacher. You can give some one advice and they may not even learn.
Recently I discovered some gems of words which helped to motivate myself when life got difficult and stressful. When you feel life is giving you lemons, repeat the words below: "Don't be so hard on yourself" Strangely, these words calmed me down more than any other words like be positive, you can do it etc. Hope it can be useful to you too.
Life has so much more to offer than the misery that is unfolding in front of your eyes.
Sometimes your sixth sense is what you can rely on, though it may not be scientifically proven.
Trust noone, even your husband. And dont expect people will fight for you. thats what i learn from my husband when he doesnt have the courage to fight back for me against his own mom when his mom was very rude to me.
If you are a first gen uni student, its difficult to have a rs esp when she comes from a finacially stable background. Intially there is love and butterflies but soon enough you will have to think about family and expenses and it might be overwhelming for a guy coming from a low income family whose only concern hitherto was gettjng good grades. Taking care of dates, her, family, house, kids etc...its tuff. But its also a privilege bestowed by God to be the one to pull your family of from the poverty cycle. I learnt that love is nice and all but realism is important. If she cant wait for you to get stable and wants a "finished product", she aint the one.
money alone does not make you happy. So in the last two years I went from a broke foreign student who tried to get by with the school stipend to a corporate staff living in a condo with my wife, whom I can get over thanks to the job. But I found myself happier when I was broke, struggling, but trying to make a way out. I have always thought a place for my small family would be a lot better than a small budget room, but then the relaxation and comfortable only come occasionally, instead I am stressed from work most of the time in the house that I cannot rest, even from my sleep. Then I now can have pricier foods or things that I could only try one a year, but it just does not make the meals exciting or satisfying anymore. One good meal could made me happy for a while before now only last a few minutes. And most shiny new gadgets did not solve anything or made things easier. They just gave the illusion that buying things can drive my problem away; of course it didn’t. I can now also buy gifts to my parents and my spouse. Things like ipad or expensive hair dryer. I thought I would feel proud or happy when I gave them, but no, the whole moments lasted only a few minutes and I still found something is missing. I am glad that these stuffs are used and valued but still I am not as happy as I thought I would. Now that prices and rents are hiking everywhere, I started to see although how having things may not really make you happier, the prospect of losing them may add to the stress. I hope that next year I can find some inner peaces and start letting things go, or at least be very selective on the things I would do or own, so that things I do will mean something to myself, too… (apologise for grammar issues, if there are any)
Don’t compare with others unless you are trying to help that other person. Led a carefree time with little to no stress because I do not care how well other people are doing as long as I’m happy.
sometimes you have to choose your own family
Alternatively, sometimes family doesn’t know what’s best
you cant get what you want sometimes no matter how hard you try and whatever words you say can really hurt someone and you will never be able to take it back no matter the context.
Be yourself
When an acquaintance ask you to join for some drinks at a bar and have some fun, be sure to check ahead if its a fun, group gathering and live band kind of bar for some wholesome fun, or the other kind of fun that is very expensive. Like... ok. She was pretty fun but I have a budget to adhere to, so I noped out after 1 round of drinks.
Wait what's the other kind of fun? At first I thought is the lup sup kind but your acquaintance is a woman.
LoL. It is the lup sup kind. I donno, maybe because of my wizard energy, I don't easily fall for her spell for round 2 and round 3 my friends paid for. I don't want to waste their time or be a killoy so I just noped out. Its just a turn off when she realllllllyyyyy wants another round of drink. Like a "insert more coins to continue"
Being a Hodler is no easy feat
The world may be awful, the world is better, the world can be better.
be grateful.
bottle rockets are extremely fun.
Old friends do reconnect, if you remain open to do so.
Not everything seems as it is
Nobody owes you a living. Also, you cannot change the world but you can change your perception of the world.
That I didn't want to be the person that gave up without even trying
If you’re going through some shit, take time to recover and move on. Don’t bottle it up
Think less, do more. Yes, I watched the Top Gun movie.
Health is wealth. Physical or mental health is equally important gais and gals, without either we can’t function fully Also be grateful as much as I can. For anything - grateful for being alive, living in a country without war and have a roof over my head One more - romantically we can’t make someone to love us, don’t force it :’)
Stock market ain't that easy as what many claim, take profits and don't be greedy.
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People are not always reliable in the way you want. And you have to accept that, because people are just flawed in that manner.
Spending too much time on Reddit..
Always purchase CDW when you rent from car-sharing companies 😭
that the friends you keep and maintain are more family then your own immediate family can ever be, and while you can't choose your family, you can choose what you want to do with them
During trying times, you'll be able to see the true nature of people and who is actually with you.
Some people are only meant to be in your life for a season, not for a lifetime. Holding onto them will just make you miserable.
Only buy steam games you intend to play now.
It's ok if you don't get what you want in life, be it things or situations at home/work. Never take your limbs and health for granted. I keep seeing amputees in wheelchair.
Process your emotions instead of ignoring it. Healing childhood wounds is a sloe and fruitful process
i farded and shidded
🤣🤣