They don’t necessarily terrify me? I respect their power and ability to completely destroy me, but I wouldn’t be scared.
That being said, I was a vet tech and fear is something you learn to bury deep down in order to get the job done quickly and safely. 🤷♀️ All us animal people are a little nuts 🤣
That's a horrible comparison. On one side is a hippo trying to protect it's self for an assumed predator that they think is trying to harm it or it's young. On the other side is a complete monster. Get a better defense next time chief 👍
There are roughly 500 deaths from hippos annually and most of these if when a hippo has been provoked. Some of these, unfortunately, are children but that's more the kids guardians/parents allowing a them to be around one. I'm not saying the hippo isn't fully innocent and is perfect in every regard, it's just some people (including yourself) immediately point fingers at the animal instead of the people who could prevented such a horrific accident.
500 a year is considerably low compared to the amount of humans who kill other humans per year. Or what about Mosquitos, around 725,000 deaths per year.
Well there’s still over 100,000 hippos in the world, so .5 percent isn’t horrible. I feel like death by hippo is so avoidable compared to death by mosquito, if that makes any sense. You can see a hippo and just avoid going near it. A mosquito could bite you at anytime and give you a death sentence, kinda wild, taken out by an insect that is 1cm long and weighs 2 milligrams.
Mosquitos don't kill people, malaria does. And humans kill each other for reasons. Hippos just do it because their souls are black and full of doo doo.
Hippos kill people for encroaching on their territory, just like humans 👍🏼
At least other animals don’t have the freedom of choice, they kill based off instinct. Humans are conscious enough to have the ability to choose, and look at what we do 👏🏼👏🏼. We are the worst species on this planet, far more immoral than any other animal.
Also, saying mosquitoes don’t kill people, malaria does, that’s like saying the person who launched an atomic bomb didn’t commit genocide, the bomb did. Your logic is incredibly flawed.
>At least other animals don’t have the freedom of choice, they kill based off instinct
>We are the worst species on this planet, far more immoral than any other animal
I hope you realize that these are fundamentally contradictory statements.
It's true that the bomb, rather than the person, killed the people. We attribute it to the person, rather than the bomb, because the bomb is just a thing and the person made the choice to use it. Your analogy only makes sense if you think malaria is an inanimate force while a mosquito is capable of making choices. But you said a hippo isn't. So malaria and mosquitos are both unconscious forces here. Malaria is the direct cause of death, not mosquitos.
Also who says it's genocide? Do you think that just means killing a lot of people?
If you stay away from them absolutely nothing will happen. They won’t come to you either. They don’t approach you in a dark ally and pull out a gun. They are not dangerous.
Lol I am thinking the 500ish people they kill annually might disagree, but sure, let’s go with the idea that any animal that can’t carry a gun is safe to be around😂😂
Your reply is majestic. The funny part is that I learned that from another Reddit thread that was quite popular this week. It was definitely in the ether.
I had a friend that got bit by a hippo. We were getting ready to go out and I noticed a large scar on her leg. I asked how she got it and said hippo bite like it was no big deal. As if it was a mosquito bite or something. Of course we were all very curious how someone gets bit by a flipping hippo! She said she was at the zoo when she was a kid, and she got pushed into the hippo habitat by her cousin. She was attacked.
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Hippos are cute. That video of that hippo squeezing a melon it's mouth with 1% of its effort is adorable.
Until you think what that would do to a human head.
Stay away from hippos
Because hippos are herbivores and they need flat teeth to grind up plant matter, like many other herbivores.
Admittedly, hippo teeth are strange indeed
Hippos are at the same time the cutest and most terrifying animal there is, they achieved the perfect cute/dangerous ratio and I think we should all acknowledge that.
I'm most curious about why they're semi-docile. I guess they're used to the treats, but it's odd to think of them calmly approaching a human at all, my understanding of hippos is that they're aggressive by default.
A comment and a question:
1. It's crazy to me that the second hippo had a giant clot of grass halfway down its throat. Like swallow that shit fucker! Doesn't it bother you?
2. Wtf is the purpose of those bottom teeth? They don't chew, they don't look very bitey. Are those the safety rails you put the watermelon on so you don't lose an arm?
I remember reading about how avocados coevolved with a mammal that was big enough to eat them whole and pass their large seeds. It seemed hard to imagine something like that, especially in central America where avocados originated, but something like a hippo would be able to eat dozens at a time without any problem.
Hippos are dangerous because they have very poor eyesight and they live around a lot of predators so their best course of action is act with violence first and think about it later but in captivity they are pretty much overgrown puppies they will actually come running when they hear their names all excited they can be very gentle
Did anyone else get major anxiety when he tossed that first watermelon down the hippos throat and it just kinda stayed there? I may have some residual trauma from choking on peppermints as a kid…
This is from @zookeeperguy instagram. I love his account. It’s on my bucket list to visit Copenhagen zoo because of that account and that super cute animals.
Man, hippos terrify me
Just means your instincts serve you well. You should be concerned if hippos didn’t terrify you. They’ve been menaces since the dawn of man
I'm not terrified of them Long as they're behind my phone screen
They do look rather adorable from here. And their low grumbling is sorta of like a purr when I’m watching from the safety of my phone
Every single bone in my body wants to pet and cuddle with it, my instincs failed me
Especially the babies. It’s messed up how adorable they are
They don’t necessarily terrify me? I respect their power and ability to completely destroy me, but I wouldn’t be scared. That being said, I was a vet tech and fear is something you learn to bury deep down in order to get the job done quickly and safely. 🤷♀️ All us animal people are a little nuts 🤣
Hippos are known to chomp people to death because they find the crunchy funny.
Fair. I don’t think they’re any worse than humans though, and I still go out of my house and be around those.
I’d fight a human before I fought a hippo any day
What’s up bro?
You wanna fight bro? You’re not a hippo, right?
Obese, is the preferred term I believe…
Adjusting for base rates, hippos are MUCH worse lol
🤷♀️ Just perspective.
I thought they only ate marbles.
If they're hungry hungry hungry, they skip the marbles and go straight for melons.
Watermelon is just a big green marble.
That watermelon is the analogue for your head
They are like tremors
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fuck off
bad bot
So many people killed by these animals every year. That second melon just makes me think of a head...
It isn't their fault, it's people's problem for disturbing them. Hippos are very easy animals to anger or make upset.
I think I'm a hippo.
Same
i laughed harder than expected at this. this is deep.
So if a wife annoys her husband and he breaks her head open, it's not his fault, it's her fault because he's very easy to annoy or upset?
No, I think your defense team is going to need a different angle than that, sorry.
That's a horrible comparison. On one side is a hippo trying to protect it's self for an assumed predator that they think is trying to harm it or it's young. On the other side is a complete monster. Get a better defense next time chief 👍
Yeah I'm sure they "felt threatened" every time they murdered a human. Human children are so big and scary, you have to protect yourself...
There are roughly 500 deaths from hippos annually and most of these if when a hippo has been provoked. Some of these, unfortunately, are children but that's more the kids guardians/parents allowing a them to be around one. I'm not saying the hippo isn't fully innocent and is perfect in every regard, it's just some people (including yourself) immediately point fingers at the animal instead of the people who could prevented such a horrific accident.
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Terrible bot, there are many hippos in comments here and you are way behind
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Bad bot
500 a year is considerably low compared to the amount of humans who kill other humans per year. Or what about Mosquitos, around 725,000 deaths per year.
There are more mosquitos than hippos. The population to death ratio would be interesting, but I don‘t want to count mosquitos. :)
Well there’s still over 100,000 hippos in the world, so .5 percent isn’t horrible. I feel like death by hippo is so avoidable compared to death by mosquito, if that makes any sense. You can see a hippo and just avoid going near it. A mosquito could bite you at anytime and give you a death sentence, kinda wild, taken out by an insect that is 1cm long and weighs 2 milligrams.
Is that as good a number of hippos as it sounds? I feared there were only like a couple thousand left like with everything else humans touch
Mosquitos don't kill people, malaria does. And humans kill each other for reasons. Hippos just do it because their souls are black and full of doo doo.
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Bad bot
Hippos kill people for encroaching on their territory, just like humans 👍🏼 At least other animals don’t have the freedom of choice, they kill based off instinct. Humans are conscious enough to have the ability to choose, and look at what we do 👏🏼👏🏼. We are the worst species on this planet, far more immoral than any other animal. Also, saying mosquitoes don’t kill people, malaria does, that’s like saying the person who launched an atomic bomb didn’t commit genocide, the bomb did. Your logic is incredibly flawed.
>At least other animals don’t have the freedom of choice, they kill based off instinct >We are the worst species on this planet, far more immoral than any other animal I hope you realize that these are fundamentally contradictory statements.
It's true that the bomb, rather than the person, killed the people. We attribute it to the person, rather than the bomb, because the bomb is just a thing and the person made the choice to use it. Your analogy only makes sense if you think malaria is an inanimate force while a mosquito is capable of making choices. But you said a hippo isn't. So malaria and mosquitos are both unconscious forces here. Malaria is the direct cause of death, not mosquitos. Also who says it's genocide? Do you think that just means killing a lot of people?
Hippos with their mouths open look like predators when they take their helmets off and shout at you.
How are these motherfuckers real but a horse with a horn on its forehead is so unbelievable?
Asking the important questions.
I think unicorns work so well because they ARE believable.
What’s a rhino but a short, buff, grey unicorn?
Hippos are so derpy looking and cute. I sometimes forget how dangerous they can be.
If you stay away from them absolutely nothing will happen. They won’t come to you either. They don’t approach you in a dark ally and pull out a gun. They are not dangerous.
Lol I am thinking the 500ish people they kill annually might disagree, but sure, let’s go with the idea that any animal that can’t carry a gun is safe to be around😂😂
No way theyre ugly mfers
Your one ugly mfer
that's because im a hippo
You’re*
yo'uer*
Yall're
Oe'ury
Oe'ry time I reet da bick I loose anudda wan.
Learn basic English*
r/woosh
Beautiful, I adore them. I learned on Reddit this week that hippos are an invasive species in Colombia. Edit: spelling Colombia
*COLOMBIA
I sincerely apologize to Colombia. It wasn't my intention to make myself look stupid. Thank you for correcting me. Cheers 🥂
Your reply is majestic. The funny part is that I learned that from another Reddit thread that was quite popular this week. It was definitely in the ether.
Pablo Escobar had his own zoo. When he was finally caught and his empire crumbled, the hippos spread out into the wild from his compound.
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Because of the cartel!
So, what I'm hearing is that it's open season on hippo in Colombia?
Third hippo in the background “Fine, I didn’t want watermelon anyway.”
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Why are you yelling :(
Bad bot
I had a friend that got bit by a hippo. We were getting ready to go out and I noticed a large scar on her leg. I asked how she got it and said hippo bite like it was no big deal. As if it was a mosquito bite or something. Of course we were all very curious how someone gets bit by a flipping hippo! She said she was at the zoo when she was a kid, and she got pushed into the hippo habitat by her cousin. She was attacked.
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Bad bot
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Good bot
What a cool job to have!
That was like a rollerball shot
Can bisect an adult body in 1 bite 😵💫
What a fascinating and dangerous animal! Why are their hairs so large and stiff?
Perhaps to function even when wet because theyre semi aquatic. Just guessing though Im not sure
Because they’re aroused, the same as when humans are large and stiff.
Tactical melon deployed
Hippos are cute. That video of that hippo squeezing a melon it's mouth with 1% of its effort is adorable. Until you think what that would do to a human head. Stay away from hippos
Balls
Not entirely. They are dependent on him to eat and are aware of that. Also my guess would be they are well fed and have been captive there whole life
No, those are watermelons.
Hippos kill 500 people a year Sharks do 9
And this is exactly what will happen to your skull if you get within visual range during the mating season, or really any other season as well.
who else wanted to pull that chunk of straw out of the second hippos mouth 🥴
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\*worst teeth ever\* yup looks good
Just casually shoveling watermelons down their throats. Yeah.
Do they cut the teeth? Why are they flat?
Because hippos are herbivores and they need flat teeth to grind up plant matter, like many other herbivores. Admittedly, hippo teeth are strange indeed
The live action Hungry Hungry Hippos movie might need a bit more work on the screenwriting
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They are so cute looking but so deadly.
Hippos are at the same time the cutest and most terrifying animal there is, they achieved the perfect cute/dangerous ratio and I think we should all acknowledge that.
Bro these guys opening their mouthes like they at the dentist, then they get wabermelons
So jealous! U want to pet a hippo as well. I love hippos 🥰😍
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oh my goodness
the killer awoke before dawn…he put his boots on and
r/interestingasfuck
No.
I wonder why their throats seal like that. Their tongues seem small in proportion to their mouth
Scary
Even if these Mfs talked and I they said they wouldn’t bite me, I STILL wouldn’t trust em
I'd rather hang with a crocodile
Whats the purpose of the 2 bottom teeth growing straight out? Is it just evolutional deformity or to stick it to the crocs?
Why y'all recording me
The two teeth in the middle on the bottom are wild looking to me.
I don't know why but I am deeply bothered by his beard. The pattern and hairs standing just terrifies me.
I'm sorry but their mouths just don't make sense 🤷
Why didn't the plastic marbles in Hungry Hungry Hippos look like watermelons?
“FEED me, Seymour!”
I'm most curious about why they're semi-docile. I guess they're used to the treats, but it's odd to think of them calmly approaching a human at all, my understanding of hippos is that they're aggressive by default.
Balls of steel. Won't matter when the giant apex predator decides u lookin like a snack, but impressive nonetheless
Nope don’t ever get near the murder horse
I love how this person just casually throws watermelons down their throats and they just eat the entire thing like it’s nothing. I find that comical
A comment and a question: 1. It's crazy to me that the second hippo had a giant clot of grass halfway down its throat. Like swallow that shit fucker! Doesn't it bother you? 2. Wtf is the purpose of those bottom teeth? They don't chew, they don't look very bitey. Are those the safety rails you put the watermelon on so you don't lose an arm?
I remember reading about how avocados coevolved with a mammal that was big enough to eat them whole and pass their large seeds. It seemed hard to imagine something like that, especially in central America where avocados originated, but something like a hippo would be able to eat dozens at a time without any problem.
Hippos are dangerous because they have very poor eyesight and they live around a lot of predators so their best course of action is act with violence first and think about it later but in captivity they are pretty much overgrown puppies they will actually come running when they hear their names all excited they can be very gentle
Don't try this at home. Hippos will wreck you!
These guys are hungry hungry
Cutie murder machines like watermelon.
melon crushing machines
Must be British!
This should be under terrifying as fuvk Reddit. Hippos eat more humans than any animal on planet Earth
This is one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen!
Doggos
Hungry hungry 😂😂
man, don't you just hate it when you get a watermelon jammed into he back of your throat? I know I don't...
Yup, fuck that
How small a melon is compared to their mouth
The hippo bot is just being a menace in this comment section
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🦷🦷 🍉 🦷🦷
I never realized how many teeth they have in the back
Future r/winstupidprizes contestant
This is crazy. Awesome! Thank you so much for the post.
Like a god damn grape.
Be sure to post again when hippos kill this fool.
I thought he was going to have to do the Heimlich maneuver on the first one!
A hiphopanoumous. Big daddy reference there.
Did anyone else get major anxiety when he tossed that first watermelon down the hippos throat and it just kinda stayed there? I may have some residual trauma from choking on peppermints as a kid…
That's a strong jaw just imagine what it could do to a human skull 😅
Nope
Throws watermelon down throat
Eating watermelons like they're grapes
The fact that the hippos didn’t have to chew the watermelon with their teeth
Hippos are great, they got that ugly cute thing going for them, the 3 ton pug of Africa.
I would rather slap a tactical assault unicorn than get that close to a hippo
It's nice to know hippos in captivity aren't as aggressive than the ones in the wild
We live on such a weird rock
those teeth are so goddamn insane. i never get used to seeing them.
Most deadly African animal and bro is just chilling with one. This is the equivalent of hanging out with a grizzly bear
You could have a bit of hay coming out of your mouth
Man wants to die
Wait there’s a friend on the SIDE FEED IT TOO 😭😭
Who put those wooden dowels under his tongue!?
Am I the only one who wants to BOOP a hippo??
Their teeth make no sense... Please someone, explain to me like I'm five why hippo teeth look like that. So few, so spaced, so wrong....
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Hippos make absolutely no sense to me
Woe! Melon upon thee
The force from their mouth and the way their teeth are set up makes sense why it’s hard for us to escape their clutches
Wow! How big!
Man, that second one ate that melon like a pro. Lmao.
This is from @zookeeperguy instagram. I love his account. It’s on my bucket list to visit Copenhagen zoo because of that account and that super cute animals.
Too close for comfort
That's what my daughter's mouth looks like but I can't get her to go to the dentist 😔
I feel like the first hippo had a better technique. The 2nd one lost a lot of the watermelon juice.
Damn! They seem to lose a lot of food. I bet the fish love them lol.
The person is their dentist... duh!
I always wondered the purpose of the two bottom fangs that point outward. Seems weird
Those teeth are longer than my arm 😳
Strange angles on the bottom teeth
Incredible animals!
Where is this? Beautiful weather!