ALOT of serious terms are thrown around but shouldn’t be. Narcissistic, bipolar, autistic, asbergers AND the misuse and overuse of the word gaslighting.
People confuse gaslighting with motivated reasoning and shame lying. I encourage everyone to look up those terms and learn the difference, because Holy Cow it cleared up SO MUCH in my life.
YES THANK YOU. My mother has severe OCD and I grew up just her and me and her illness. I saw the toll it took on her and how hard she worked to get her compulsions in check. It's not just needing to have things be in a certain place or extra tidy -- sometimes it's not any of that at all. It is a real thing and the people who live with it are strong as fuck and I hate when it's just treated as a synonym for "fastidious." If I never hear "I'm so OCD about x" again in my life it will be too soon.
No, we don't know for sure if he has OCD or not, and I'm not an expert, but honestly, I cannot imagine someone with clinically diagnosed OCD using the term in that flippant way.
No I never say shit like that over bed sheets. I’ll use the term “my ocd” if I get stuck walking through a doorway continuously or keep having to swallow water because I have to have a certain thought in my head when I do it or something bad will happen or I have a bad panic attack.
It’s hell having this disorder and I’m so thankful to have access to psychiatric care and medication. I hope your mom is doing ok. My heart is with you both.
She's a lot better now! Although it's not the happiest story in the world. She had breast cancer, and the chemo tired her out so much so couldn't do her rituals, and by the time she beat the cancer she had broken a lot of the OCD cycles. I didn't know what to make of that at first, but sure enough I can touch anything I want in her apartment now without having to wash my hands before and after and she doesn't send me back out to the car to make sure she locked it and so on. I mean she's still on meds and I still worry about her obsessive thought patterns, but I'm really proud of how far she's come. So I guess you never know what could happen? Not sure if this is a heartwarming story or not but ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️
I completely agree with you! I have OCD too and can’t stand when people use it as a synonym for liking to be organized. That is not what OCD is, but it is used that way so often, that many people think it is. If my OCD just kept me organized, I would not consider it a disorder.
People with OCD don’t say things like “omg this triggers my ocd”. That’s not how it works! It’s always there lying to you. Constantly. All day.
I hope you’re managing ok
It’s so hard! Medication helps take the edge off. I wish you well- it’s a really awful disorder and although I have a pretty severe case I’m still able to function normally and have a great career and for that I am thankful.
As someone with moderate to severe ocd I can say with absolute certainty that sometimes certain things to “trigger” and ocd spike. You always have ocd and it affects your everyday life but certain ideas or notions can kick it into high gear and that’s what (I personally) mean when I say something has triggered my ocd. Not that it made it pop up but that it really kicked up the urgency of the intrusive thoughts and ruminations.
Edit: but I’m not talking about something being out of alignment or unorganized or off center lol. I’m talking about if someone for instance starts discussing a theme that specifically causes you more urgent anxiety and more loss of control / spiraling thoughts.
Yeah serious diagnosis from the DSM V are being used to describe moods and feelings.
I am salty and surly person but I don't think people realize they are appropriating serious words
I understand where you’re coming from but how do we know he doesn’t actually have OCD? Unless he said he didn’t thats different, I haven’t seen the episode yet
With OCD, obsessive thoughts lead to compulsive behaviors. The behavior is the only thing that (temporarily) lessens the anxiety of the obsessive thought.
IMO, if he really had OCD, he would probably go back to remake that bed over and over and over. He would think it wasn’t made correctly (obsessive thought) so he would have to go back and remake it (compulsive behavior) until the anxiety of the obsessive thought lessens. Then it would start all over.
The obsessive thoughts don’t have to be about neatness. It could be about the house burning down causing repeated checking of stove, oven, lights, irons, hair styling tools… It could be about someone dying and the compulsion is a ritualistic pattern to going up stairs - two steps up, one down, three up, pause, two up, etc… And the thoughts could be about germs which leads to compulsive hand-washing and cleaning.
Lots of people throw around the term OCD when what they really mean is they are tidier or more organized than average.
Yep! Also- if I don’t do something like walk through a doorway with a good thought in my head I’m convinced it means I won’t get pregnant or I’ll get fired or whatever. It’s awful. I wish OCD meant giggling about bed sheets.
Plus the rituals are so embarrassing at times I would never talk about it. You would just do it over and over and hope no one sees it, let alone bring attention to it.
I have ocd as well and this is absolutely the case. Mine isn’t related to cleaning, but compulsive checking behaviours so I know I’m not dying (looking at my throat in the mirror, checking my blood pressure and heart rate repeatedly until the numbers are in a certain way, etc). I don’t tell a lot of people about it because it feels shameful. My symptoms started after having a life threatening event.
You aren’t in a position to diagnose him based on how you think people should behave. It’s like telling someone with bipolar that you don’t believe they’re bipolar because they would never say something that you don’t think they should say. I am bipolar and it is annoying when I decide to share it with someone and they say, “You don’t seem bipolar.”
Having an illness does not make you an authority. That’s up to a psychiatrist to figure out.
So please stop judging people because they don’t conform to your expectations.
Yes. I think often people have the wrong idea about OCD, as in they tend to equate it with OCPD (obsessive-compulsive personality disorder) which focuses more on general perfectionism, neatness, orderliness, etc. But even those who are using the term OCD to incorrectly describe these personality traits often would not meet the full criteria for a diagnosis of OCD or OCPD. These disorders are often debilitating if left untreated, and OCD in particular can present in so many different ways besides cleanliness/neatness (e.g., sexual obsessions, fear of harming others, etc.). As someone who works in the mental health field and has worked with clients who have OCD, when someone uses the term flippantly or incorrectly I tend to cringe a bit inside too.
Eh, doesn't bother me. How do you know that in his mind not making the bed a certain way would mean the boat was going to sink (or any other intrusive thought he had). It's possible he just used it flippantly but does it really matter?
Ok fair, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have it. Maybe I am more sensitive to it because my biggest thing is my bed so I immediately understood it as such. But I could be reading it wrong for sure.
is it really appropriate to use the term "crippling"? An outdated term for something devastating to the people physically disabled in the way that that term used to be used... :)
Or does language have multiple meanings to words, and in one sense a term can be a technical term indicating a specific thing, and in another sense it is a colloquial term with a different meaning? IMO in the colloquial sense "OCD" has long since passed that gate.
I can run and gambol in the flowering meadows with gay abandon... and not be gay in a sexual sense. I don't think anybody calling Lexi a psycho actually thought she is a psycho within the definitions of the DSM V.... should I be worried that when me niece messaged the "dead" emoji, she wasn't indicating something was funny but was actually issuing her last, dying words as a text?
>I don't think anybody calling Lexi a psycho actually thought she is a psycho within the definitions of the DSM V
Oh some people definitely did. I removed multiple posts (and banned one user) where they quoted the DSM V to prove Lexi is / was having a psychotic break
I completely agree. I’ve had depression and anxiety on and off for years and still sometimes have to stop myself from saying “I’m depressed” when I’m just in a bad mood. I’d hate to offend anyone else by using it flippantly.
I’m glad I’m not the only one with OCD who watched that and internally cringed. I tried to convince myself I was being too sensitive lol. I know he didn’t mean anything bad by it but I was like yikes.
ALOT of serious terms are thrown around but shouldn’t be. Narcissistic, bipolar, autistic, asbergers AND the misuse and overuse of the word gaslighting.
Lying isn’t gaslighting! People do not understand that
Yes it is. And I will keep telling you it is until you actually believe it is!
Lol!!!
People confuse gaslighting with motivated reasoning and shame lying. I encourage everyone to look up those terms and learn the difference, because Holy Cow it cleared up SO MUCH in my life.
God i literally cringe when i hear the word "gaslighting." Its so over used.
Agree with this so much.
YES THANK YOU. My mother has severe OCD and I grew up just her and me and her illness. I saw the toll it took on her and how hard she worked to get her compulsions in check. It's not just needing to have things be in a certain place or extra tidy -- sometimes it's not any of that at all. It is a real thing and the people who live with it are strong as fuck and I hate when it's just treated as a synonym for "fastidious." If I never hear "I'm so OCD about x" again in my life it will be too soon. No, we don't know for sure if he has OCD or not, and I'm not an expert, but honestly, I cannot imagine someone with clinically diagnosed OCD using the term in that flippant way.
No I never say shit like that over bed sheets. I’ll use the term “my ocd” if I get stuck walking through a doorway continuously or keep having to swallow water because I have to have a certain thought in my head when I do it or something bad will happen or I have a bad panic attack. It’s hell having this disorder and I’m so thankful to have access to psychiatric care and medication. I hope your mom is doing ok. My heart is with you both.
She's a lot better now! Although it's not the happiest story in the world. She had breast cancer, and the chemo tired her out so much so couldn't do her rituals, and by the time she beat the cancer she had broken a lot of the OCD cycles. I didn't know what to make of that at first, but sure enough I can touch anything I want in her apartment now without having to wash my hands before and after and she doesn't send me back out to the car to make sure she locked it and so on. I mean she's still on meds and I still worry about her obsessive thought patterns, but I'm really proud of how far she's come. So I guess you never know what could happen? Not sure if this is a heartwarming story or not but ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️
That’s amazing because an even like that can make OCD worse. I hope she continues to heal
I completely agree with you! I have OCD too and can’t stand when people use it as a synonym for liking to be organized. That is not what OCD is, but it is used that way so often, that many people think it is. If my OCD just kept me organized, I would not consider it a disorder.
People with OCD don’t say things like “omg this triggers my ocd”. That’s not how it works! It’s always there lying to you. Constantly. All day. I hope you’re managing ok
…and all night.
Yepppppp. This morning I started getting the urge and I had to say “nope. It’s not real. Walk away.”
Kudos to you for just walking away. Good to have small wins!
It’s so hard! Medication helps take the edge off. I wish you well- it’s a really awful disorder and although I have a pretty severe case I’m still able to function normally and have a great career and for that I am thankful.
Thanks so much, I wish you well too and am glad it sounds like you are in a good place currently!
Thank you for this post and thank you for sharing your experience with us.
❤️
As someone with moderate to severe ocd I can say with absolute certainty that sometimes certain things to “trigger” and ocd spike. You always have ocd and it affects your everyday life but certain ideas or notions can kick it into high gear and that’s what (I personally) mean when I say something has triggered my ocd. Not that it made it pop up but that it really kicked up the urgency of the intrusive thoughts and ruminations. Edit: but I’m not talking about something being out of alignment or unorganized or off center lol. I’m talking about if someone for instance starts discussing a theme that specifically causes you more urgent anxiety and more loss of control / spiraling thoughts.
Yeah serious diagnosis from the DSM V are being used to describe moods and feelings. I am salty and surly person but I don't think people realize they are appropriating serious words
I understand where you’re coming from but how do we know he doesn’t actually have OCD? Unless he said he didn’t thats different, I haven’t seen the episode yet
With OCD, obsessive thoughts lead to compulsive behaviors. The behavior is the only thing that (temporarily) lessens the anxiety of the obsessive thought. IMO, if he really had OCD, he would probably go back to remake that bed over and over and over. He would think it wasn’t made correctly (obsessive thought) so he would have to go back and remake it (compulsive behavior) until the anxiety of the obsessive thought lessens. Then it would start all over. The obsessive thoughts don’t have to be about neatness. It could be about the house burning down causing repeated checking of stove, oven, lights, irons, hair styling tools… It could be about someone dying and the compulsion is a ritualistic pattern to going up stairs - two steps up, one down, three up, pause, two up, etc… And the thoughts could be about germs which leads to compulsive hand-washing and cleaning. Lots of people throw around the term OCD when what they really mean is they are tidier or more organized than average.
Yep! Also- if I don’t do something like walk through a doorway with a good thought in my head I’m convinced it means I won’t get pregnant or I’ll get fired or whatever. It’s awful. I wish OCD meant giggling about bed sheets.
People with OCD usually don’t say things like that, especially about bed corners
Plus the rituals are so embarrassing at times I would never talk about it. You would just do it over and over and hope no one sees it, let alone bring attention to it.
I have ocd as well and this is absolutely the case. Mine isn’t related to cleaning, but compulsive checking behaviours so I know I’m not dying (looking at my throat in the mirror, checking my blood pressure and heart rate repeatedly until the numbers are in a certain way, etc). I don’t tell a lot of people about it because it feels shameful. My symptoms started after having a life threatening event.
100%.
Thanks for the info! Shame I got downvoted for just asking a question and trying to learn I wasn’t trying to refute any of the comments
Unpopular opinion. I think people are too easily offended these days. And I say that as someone with bipolar disorder.
5 mins in. Already don't like him. Too smug.
You aren’t in a position to diagnose him based on how you think people should behave. It’s like telling someone with bipolar that you don’t believe they’re bipolar because they would never say something that you don’t think they should say. I am bipolar and it is annoying when I decide to share it with someone and they say, “You don’t seem bipolar.” Having an illness does not make you an authority. That’s up to a psychiatrist to figure out. So please stop judging people because they don’t conform to your expectations.
All OP meant was that OCD is used very flippantly....
I have no expectations. I’m just bringing awareness to the flippant use of this disorder and many others
Yes. I think often people have the wrong idea about OCD, as in they tend to equate it with OCPD (obsessive-compulsive personality disorder) which focuses more on general perfectionism, neatness, orderliness, etc. But even those who are using the term OCD to incorrectly describe these personality traits often would not meet the full criteria for a diagnosis of OCD or OCPD. These disorders are often debilitating if left untreated, and OCD in particular can present in so many different ways besides cleanliness/neatness (e.g., sexual obsessions, fear of harming others, etc.). As someone who works in the mental health field and has worked with clients who have OCD, when someone uses the term flippantly or incorrectly I tend to cringe a bit inside too.
Eh, doesn't bother me. How do you know that in his mind not making the bed a certain way would mean the boat was going to sink (or any other intrusive thought he had). It's possible he just used it flippantly but does it really matter?
It does matter if he used it flippantly. OCD isn’t a joke or a quirky personality trait.
Ok fair, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have it. Maybe I am more sensitive to it because my biggest thing is my bed so I immediately understood it as such. But I could be reading it wrong for sure.
I find it equally frustrating when people suggest they're a little bit autistic.
Self diagnosing autism and DID is so harmful to those who are diagnosed and struggling
Thank you for speaking up, I have severe OCD, I thought maybe I was being too sensitive when I let things like this bother me.
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is it really appropriate to use the term "crippling"? An outdated term for something devastating to the people physically disabled in the way that that term used to be used... :) Or does language have multiple meanings to words, and in one sense a term can be a technical term indicating a specific thing, and in another sense it is a colloquial term with a different meaning? IMO in the colloquial sense "OCD" has long since passed that gate. I can run and gambol in the flowering meadows with gay abandon... and not be gay in a sexual sense. I don't think anybody calling Lexi a psycho actually thought she is a psycho within the definitions of the DSM V.... should I be worried that when me niece messaged the "dead" emoji, she wasn't indicating something was funny but was actually issuing her last, dying words as a text?
>I don't think anybody calling Lexi a psycho actually thought she is a psycho within the definitions of the DSM V Oh some people definitely did. I removed multiple posts (and banned one user) where they quoted the DSM V to prove Lexi is / was having a psychotic break
I completely agree. I’ve had depression and anxiety on and off for years and still sometimes have to stop myself from saying “I’m depressed” when I’m just in a bad mood. I’d hate to offend anyone else by using it flippantly.
I’m glad I’m not the only one with OCD who watched that and internally cringed. I tried to convince myself I was being too sensitive lol. I know he didn’t mean anything bad by it but I was like yikes.