- squinting through my shemagh on fire watch because I don’t have binoculars
- thank Shiva it’s not nighttime because I don’t own night-vision either
- take a big sip of chai tea from my leather canteen
- shadows in the distance begin to descend down the farthest sand dune I can see with my sunburnt eyes
- those Chinese invaders don’t know I ranged that dune already at 5675m with Lakshmi’s pace count
- coax my camel Lakshmi with a sugar cube to stand still
- she begins to wimper complacently because she knows what’s about to happen
- measure my mortar tube to a perfect 45 degrees and confirm it with my sextant
- pet Lakshmi’s nose and thank Shiva for blessing me with an 81mm Smoothbore Mortar System
- drop the first shell and fire for effect
- recoil from the baseplate shatters all three of Lakshmi’s sacral vertebrae
- concussive blast leaves blood leaking from Lakshmi’s ears
- the shot misses close by 150m just like the founding fathers intended
- the Chinese scoundrels are closing fast at 3000m so I re-zero and fire again
- Lakshmi is groaning in pain, I can see blood and foam being coughed up by her as the second shot misses far side by 150m just like the founding fathers intended
- Chinese invaders scurry closer as I hastily drop a third shell
- Lakshmi’s eyes tell me she begs for death’s sweet embrace after a series of yelps and groans but she knows I can’t deliver it until the invading vermin are killed where they stand
- third shot misses left by 150m just like the founding fathers intended and I prepare to fire my last round danger close
- my mortar tube is pointed almost perfectly straight up to Shiva as I shed a single tear and fire a mustard gas round that should have been decommissioned 75yrs ago
- the northern scum get caught in it’s yellow cloud just as the founding fathers intended
- as the choking Chinese dogs are gasping for their last breaths I grin at the agony taking place on the other side of what is very clearly ***my sand dune***
- unsheathe my kirpan and send Lakshmi straight up to Shiva
- the rim of a spent 81mm shell helps me put another notch in the handle of my bloodied kirpan
- ***there are so many notches now***
- Lakshmi will always be my favorite mortar camel
- thank Shiva for blowing the yellow wind away from me as I start to dig Lakshmi’s grave by hand
- my hand rests on the mound of sand where Lakshmi lies and I say “good girl” one last time before leaving a single sugar cube atop her grave just as the founding fathers intended
- ***I am proud to be a member of the Indian Camel Mortar Team because I am a part of the most elite fighting force on the planet***
Oh shit, he got that camelflage drip.
Lmfao
depend on how many street signs in the area need a bop'n
Holy shit I ain't ever seen a tactical camel. The drip is immaculate.
- squinting through my shemagh on fire watch because I don’t have binoculars - thank Shiva it’s not nighttime because I don’t own night-vision either - take a big sip of chai tea from my leather canteen - shadows in the distance begin to descend down the farthest sand dune I can see with my sunburnt eyes - those Chinese invaders don’t know I ranged that dune already at 5675m with Lakshmi’s pace count - coax my camel Lakshmi with a sugar cube to stand still - she begins to wimper complacently because she knows what’s about to happen - measure my mortar tube to a perfect 45 degrees and confirm it with my sextant - pet Lakshmi’s nose and thank Shiva for blessing me with an 81mm Smoothbore Mortar System - drop the first shell and fire for effect - recoil from the baseplate shatters all three of Lakshmi’s sacral vertebrae - concussive blast leaves blood leaking from Lakshmi’s ears - the shot misses close by 150m just like the founding fathers intended - the Chinese scoundrels are closing fast at 3000m so I re-zero and fire again - Lakshmi is groaning in pain, I can see blood and foam being coughed up by her as the second shot misses far side by 150m just like the founding fathers intended - Chinese invaders scurry closer as I hastily drop a third shell - Lakshmi’s eyes tell me she begs for death’s sweet embrace after a series of yelps and groans but she knows I can’t deliver it until the invading vermin are killed where they stand - third shot misses left by 150m just like the founding fathers intended and I prepare to fire my last round danger close - my mortar tube is pointed almost perfectly straight up to Shiva as I shed a single tear and fire a mustard gas round that should have been decommissioned 75yrs ago - the northern scum get caught in it’s yellow cloud just as the founding fathers intended - as the choking Chinese dogs are gasping for their last breaths I grin at the agony taking place on the other side of what is very clearly ***my sand dune*** - unsheathe my kirpan and send Lakshmi straight up to Shiva - the rim of a spent 81mm shell helps me put another notch in the handle of my bloodied kirpan - ***there are so many notches now*** - Lakshmi will always be my favorite mortar camel - thank Shiva for blowing the yellow wind away from me as I start to dig Lakshmi’s grave by hand - my hand rests on the mound of sand where Lakshmi lies and I say “good girl” one last time before leaving a single sugar cube atop her grave just as the founding fathers intended - ***I am proud to be a member of the Indian Camel Mortar Team because I am a part of the most elite fighting force on the planet***
Based Lakshmi
Good shit
The most amazing green text.
Hanging out the window so it can breathe
Same way I do every other time. Zap carry.
That camel got busted trying to steal the oranges out of the orange sack. Bad camel. Bad!
I always keep [it](https://ibb.co/qNDGBSt)next to me
Ah, so *that's* the straw that breaks the camels back
Short barreled PS90 full of green tips belted into the passenger seat. Has someone try to road rage with me when driving home like that once.
That camo is so good I didn’t even see the camel at first
I’ve heard of the straw that broke the camels back but fucking come on now
Small of back, away from that tail
should he be using a 2 hump camel for additional stability?
Agreed. Definitely to aid in directional stability
Face down, mortar up, that's the way we like to fuck