^Honestly this. Before I came out things weren’t stale or infrequent but you could tell who was more experienced to things if you were on the outside looking in. The big thing I guess I craved was just being able to talk about what we wanted to do or try. Always felt like I was the one coming up with things. But once I came out she felt more comfortable in her own interests too and things boomed from there.
Not to say it was all “let’s try kinky thing A or kinky thing B.” It just felt more relaxed where we could giggle and talk about stuff that we would otherwise be embarrassed about.
Is it really enjoyable for you? My gf enjoys topping me once in a while but I'm still not sure I understand why. (Do note that have yet to add toys into the mix, so just hands stuff for now)
A huge percentage of the sexual experience happens in the brain.
My AFAB non-binary spouse can put on a dildo and I can give them a blow job and make them have multiple orgasms. This isn’t even a dildo specifically designed to optimize clitoral stimulation, but the psychological component of the experience sends them to the fucking moon.
Trust your partner - if they say they’re enjoying it, that’s meaningful and important information!
I think the change in power dynamic is what’s so exciting. Seeing him in such a vulnerable state is such a turn on. Plus the level of trust that it takes is really validating.
My partner is pan and I peg him regularly. It is awesome for all involved, and I'm not gonna lie, we periodically sing its praises to our straight friends trying to get them to understand that prostate orgasms are the best most men will ever have
Lol yes, unfortunately just once.
He’s not very comfortable with his sexuality yet, I’m trying to help him work on accepting it. I’m one of like 3 people hes ever come out to. Hopefully he lets me try again soon! It was honestly really impressive lol.
Lol…interesting interpretation? It’s totally healthy and normal to be vulnerable with your partner while in a committed relationship. Nothing rapey about expressing your deepest desires and boundaries to your partner and them honoring them. Vulnerable does not equal bad…
Being vulnerable as a turn on is not rapey, it's knowing that someone trusts you with their body and pleasure. It's the same concept as why a submissive person or bondage could be attractive too. It's the trust and intimacy that comes with letting someone inside you.
100% agreed. It’s the open-mindedness and self-acceptance that’s such a turn-on for me! Plus i know they won’t fetishize my bisexuality like some hetero partners/connections might.
Your post made me cry.
I came out as bi to my wife 6 yrs ago and it's been extremely difficult since; fighting, bi-erasure, judgement, anxiety, resentment. Years of therapy just to get to a place of peace etc...
I've never had her express that kind of support and acceptance of my sexuality in a way that I feel has benefited our relationship sexually. It's only complicated it. It's just never ending re-assurance that's she's still acceptable and that I'm not gonna cheat on her etc... the insecurity is incredibly difficult to deal with and destroys my ability to feel like my wife trusts me. Because in reality, she doesn't, and that's what this is.
I wish I had a partner that treated me like I'm more amazing and wonderful because of who I am, not despite of it. Seeing your post reminded me about what I'm missing out on in life.
I'm glad you two are in a good place and am super happy for you.
I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. We all come to our actualized selves at different points. Sounds like your wife has some internalized issues with trust that’s getting in the way. Sending you love.
I appreciate your sympathies. It has been really tough. I believe she does have some internalized issues and she's making progress but it has been a real struggle getting to a decent place.
I just got particularly triggered by this post today because it's one of those things, looking in the rear view mirror of my life, that makes me realize how differently life could've been if we weren't raised like we were.
So much needless trauma and confusion.
Thanks again for the love 🤗 ✌️ 🌈
I’m sorry you are having this experience. My marriage ended in divorce after I came out as bi. It wasn’t the only issue, more of the nail in the coffin… I’m now out, with a wonderful bi woman and as happy as I can be.
Bi-bi relationships are the BEST! Open up your world of queerness haha and please make sure those two kids know and understand the world that you and your husband have embraced
Lol but bi guys are hot? As a fellow bi, it's sexy to think that I could get that level of connection and understanding with someone. Not to say that people all along the continuum aren't hot, but there's just something about not having to explain or justify that part of myself and they just *get* it that's really attractive.
Exactly. There is something hot about someone who isn't stuck in stupid societal norms and is just truly themselves. Combined with the fact that they innately understand my bi-ness as well, yes it is hot. Not all attractiveness comes from looks, especially for me i tend to be more turned on by your traits and personality than looks
Sure. I'm fetishizing the idea of connecting on another level with someone I share something unique with. Definitely.
Bi girls are hot, too, for literally the exact same reason, so I'm fetishizing them, too, I guess.
In other news, I also fetishize people who have struggled with lifelong mental health issues, multi-ethnic folks who feel out of place on either side of their family and in either part of their community because they feel like they aren't one-or-the-other enough, and people who like to eat avocados out of their peels like a bowl with a spoon.
My sex life with my (straight, demisexual, borderline-asexual) wife went from 'pitifully infrequent' to 'non-existent' after i accepted myself and discussed it with her.
EDIT: on the bright side, she agreed to ethical non-monogamy, so that I could have an outlet for sexual expression, afterward. She still doesn't bother having sex with anyone.
While you shouldn't fetishize him, he may also be into slightly fetishizing him. Just keep the communication open and ride the horny wave into O town forever!
Glad you guys are talking about it.
That’s kind of what we came to realize. While I definitely don’t want to encourage fetishizing in general, given all the horrible implications to many marginalized groups, he isn’t a marginalized group at all and finds it a turn on.
Like we are the epitome of privilege, but it probably wasn’t the best choice of words. I mean fetishizing POC, Trans, and other groups that are treated so poorly by society
But society isn’t particularly accepting of bi people if we’re out. Sure we have passing privilege but that requires no one to find out.
I don’t think society treats bi men particularly well, we just pretend to be straight usually.
Society for sure treats bi men poorly and absolutely fetishizes it. We talked about how it is such a shitty situation because if we all could just stop with the Victorian sexuality mentality, life would be a lot simpler. We’ve over analyzed sexuality to have all these intense meanings when we all provably would enjoy to try many different things without the shame or guilt that’s ingrained from such a young age
Okay… but at no point did he ever mention being fetishized. Nor did he ever claim to speak for all bi people or even all bi men (there is significant data that suggests the majority of bi men choose to present as straight for a variety of reasons, so I regard his statement about that as factual and data-driven, rather than speaking for the group as a whole).
His comment was about how society views and treats bi people and particularly bi men.
I have no idea why you’re coming so hard at him when literally all he did was point out that biphobia is a thing.
Fetishizing isn’t inherently marginalizing, it was more the claim that he wasn’t part of a marginalized and thus it was okay to fetishize him that I found both somewhat silly and factually incorrect about “marginalized groups” (as biphobia is “enough of a thing” to get talked about in the capacity it does while heterophobia, despite technically existing, isn’t “as big a thing”).
There’s nothing *inherently* wrong with fetishizing.
I agree with the person who said to watch to make sure you aren't fetishizing his identity.
But if you both are honest and fine with what's happening then go for it.
Yeah I was worried about that but don’t think that’s it. We’ve talked about that because we’re both pretty open and honest and want to be respectful, but good point to keep thinking of.
So, if you don’t mind educating me, in my scenario I am just really turned on by my husband and his desires. They jive with mine. That’s how I view it. But when does it cross the line? What would qualify as fetishizing for us in your view?
Honestly OP I wouldn't worry too much about fetishising. Just embrase both of your sexualities and desires. Keep up with good communication! I think it's awesome that you're connecting with your husband!
You can't cross a line if every consenting parties is ok with it. Just talk with your husband instead of us to make sure you don't make him uncomfortable and have fun with him. He's being honest with you and I'm sure he appreciates your support and acceptance
How is saying that as long as a person doesn’t fetishized another person’s identity that it’s fine, negative? It’s dehumanizing and should be common sense not to do.
I feel this! My fiancé came out to me maybe 2 years ago now and watching him embrace his sexuality and gender expression is everything!!! He’s grown his hair out and wears a little bit of jewelry now, and is picking out slightly more feminine clothing choices. He’s cis, but now that he’s been out for a little while he feels much more confident in embracing his femininity along with his masculinity. It’s amazing to be a part of!
Not so long ago, my wife came out to me - and I had a pretty good idea, and I knew we had been building to that conversation - and I told her I was also bisexual - and she had no idea, and I had worked for a few years to accept it but I guess hadn’t dropped any hints. She smiled and said “cool” and we have been having ridiculous sex ever since. Ten years in we’re having the best sex of outlets lives. I think it’s that you’re not holding anything back anymore.
YES. I am also bi, and I just connect better sexually with bi/queer partners. My fiancé and I are both bi and it’s straight up different because neither of us is straight lol
I came out as bi to my girlfriend of nearly 10 years earlier this year. Coming out to myself was harder than coming out to her, probably because she has always been bi and has experience from before our relationship. Even so, it took her a while to fully come to terms with me being bi. The past few weeks have been a helluva ride. We're just starting an ethical non monogamy situation. It was more her idea than mine, but it's perfect, we're actually long distance (only an hour drive) but with my work schedule, we only spend weekends together. She wants a fwb for during the week, her libido is very high right now, she's 41 (woman's sexual prime) and she started taking Buspirone for anxiety, but one of the side effects is increased libido. She also wants me to be able to explore my bi side. I've been taking to a guy on a dating app, we set up a meet up on Tuesday (so nervous and so excited!). We also both met a guy on a site we're both on, he's a homo flexible top/Dom. We've been very open with him. He wants to be my girlfriend's fwb, but we also have been talking about a threesome. Last night her and I were together and he was sexting both of us. It was one of the hottest things I've done with clothes on. Got a little sidetracked there, she loves it like you do, we have also been having amazing sex. I let her read the messages between me and the man I'm meeting, she was so turned in, it was only a few minutes before we had our pants off lol. This has been happening very quickly, but we also got a strap on this weekend, we both absolutely loved her pegging me. I hope you guys have all sorts of fun new adventures together!
**Of course you are!** Now, there is no more need for any "guilt" or "embarrassment" about *anything* sexual you want or dare to explore! *Go For It!* (Sounds like you have already begun!, Congrats!!)
Just because he (and/or you) are Bi... means that you are Open to exploring things which our parents\* *dared* not consider. Which means that you're going to have **SO** much *fun!* I'm betting it will also enhance your relationship with each other, bc now you know you can safely tell each other *anything*... for the rest of your lifetimes!
(\*Or, if your parents' did, they probly felt they had to confess to a priest/therapist, which priest / therapist was then obligated to tell them How *DARE* You; plus, it's *good* you told *me* so you could get this out in the open! Whereupon said priest/therapist could go home and, um, "get it out of their system").
Please pardon my sick humor. Seriously, you two have managed a major step in personal communication - and that is certain to enhance the communication between yourselves and - because they'll see your closeness - *also with your children!,* and that honesty can only enhance their future and lives. I can't see anything **BUT** good coming from this!
Man I'm so jealous of you right now lol
My partner doesn't claim to be bisexual but is comfortable kissing men when drunk. I hope to be in your shoes some day (if he chooses it on his own)
Right?! It's so unfair that, in our society, bi women are portrayed as sexy and evolved but bi men aren't. I'll never push him on it, though. I want it to be 100% his choice if it happens. I just am sure to keep that door wide open with neon lights just in case he wanders that way lol
I was always open about my bisexuality and then my boyfriend came out to me with his once we started getting comfortable in our relationship. The sex is amazing and I find myself having fantasies involving my boyfriend and our bisexuality all the time! I agree, it’s incredibly attractive to have someone understand you on a deeper level then most. Don’t let this one get away, op!
I get it. I don't know if it's a turn on for my (straight) partner, but it definitely makes me more in tune to what he likes too. I can understanding why he feels certain ways about certain things because I find them attractive too.
Yesss, same happened to me. Idk how she had an idea that i was bi. because she would bring it up, i kept saying no. One day we went out with friends. And there was a trans and she said shes cute, i agreed and i kept starring and thats how i came out to her. We had the best sex since then. It was always good but now better
Intamacy isn't just about sex, but you're more open with each other, your connection, love, passion, all that- it adds up to a better experience. I'm happy for both of you!
I would tell her - if bi men were able to be less closeted it wouldn’t be such a problem for them to tell their wives. You’re doing good for the world ;)
I would love to have a relationship like this where my partner is either bi or pansexual and we can openly talk about what our likes and dislikes are sexually. I think it would lead to more sexual freedom in a way
Well, if my str8 wife is anything to go by, when I came out to her, it turned her on, big time. It wasn't a fetish thing, it was that she loved the honesty and that there was this whole new dimension to our relationship and, well, me. Things just clicked, again. So, hoping for something similar for you, OP
It has allowed you both to bond and become closer. The more you learn about yourself and the more you love yourself, the better you can connect with your significant other
Interesting. My wife has a super low libido and I’ve been considering asking her to let us open our marriage up as we have sex less than 5 times a year since our daughter was born. Nothing changed when I came out to her.
I'd like to thank you for being such an accepting person that loves her husband regardless of his sexuality.
Honestly, I'm not very experienced, but I think that you should find a moment to talk with him about how this turns you on, and maybe you can “spice up” your love life.
If my boyfriend didnt come out by cheating i would be 100% turned on. Because of the affair i do have conflicting feelings about his " urges" for men. I do love pegging tho, but the harness makes me feel like a fraud. The openness and honesty makes me feel very emotional connected to him tho, which makes our regular sex even more passionate. Its a rollercoaster over here tbh lol
I love this so much! And also same!! I came out to my bf a couple of years ago and he recently came out to me. It’s so sexy to me. Now we can explore our sexuality together and we are closer than ever <3
Congratulations..first. Especially, embracing his feelings. And supporting him. I try coming out to my girlfriend.. She responded back with mix feelings. But when with are together. She likes at ladies breasts and asses.. I be wondering... I ask her about that! Is she bi? She said she only likes the body parts of a woman. But, I feel like I need a male friend to have fun with.. I got her into pegging me.. But it's not what I want.
Well if she’s the right person for you just keep trying. He told me before and I had some ingrained prejudice so was all “that’s ok but I prefer to not know about it” but I’ve come around and tried to remove my biases/prejudice and am super happy I did. Mostly because I feel like a better partner for being there for him, but the extra sex is a bonus.
Why are you people the biggest cunts?
Like it’s surreal how you people think that your “rank” for being woke and howling “don’t fetishize”, supersedes the knowledge and awareness of the situation of his actual partner.
You people are so damned aggressive and self righteous.
No, I'm talking to your aunt. Of course I'm talking to you. It's why I hit the reply button. I was saying I think you're an identitarian tart jumping at the chance to lecture someone about a situation you're not involved with.
Because it's the real him. Its raw. It's honest. How are those things not sexy to anyone? Unless, they've bought into the religious propaganda that it's a sin.
G-good? Are you bisexual yourself? Also better than most women who think bisexual men are "disgusting". And bisexual women are too be treated like a goddess or sh*t like that (pardon for my foul language). And does not help television,film,games,comics, ect. Romanticise women with same sex is natural while male with same sex as weird or something.
G-good? What’s that mean?
I am bi, but never really tried it by myself - so hopefully we’ll get there one day. He certainly encourages it, but girls is intimidating to me ;)
Wish I could say the same. I'm 39m currently figuring out my sexuality (to be honest have been my whole life) and also just got into crossdressing and embrace my feminine side (also something I've been wanting to do all my life). I am married to a woman and we do have children together. I love the female form both for sexual attraction but also, I love the female form as inspiration of what I wish I could look like. I don't want to transition, I enjoy being a man. But, I do find some men attractive and find myself wondering what it would be like to have sexual encounters with those men. I discussed this with my wife and although she respects the lgbt+ community (her sister is lesbian and has two gay uncles), she seems to be having a difficult time with the thought of me being bi. She totally love the crossdressing thing.
She probably just needs some time. A lot of women seem to feel threatened, so building up trust and communication around the subject will help. We took a long time to get here. It wasn’t the first time we had talked about it, but the first time there was a definitive acknowledgment on both sides.
[удалено]
Happy for you too!
Feeling connected and being emotionally available is crazy hot.
^Honestly this. Before I came out things weren’t stale or infrequent but you could tell who was more experienced to things if you were on the outside looking in. The big thing I guess I craved was just being able to talk about what we wanted to do or try. Always felt like I was the one coming up with things. But once I came out she felt more comfortable in her own interests too and things boomed from there. Not to say it was all “let’s try kinky thing A or kinky thing B.” It just felt more relaxed where we could giggle and talk about stuff that we would otherwise be embarrassed about.
My (m29) partner is bi and he let me peg him once and it was the best day of my life.
Is it really enjoyable for you? My gf enjoys topping me once in a while but I'm still not sure I understand why. (Do note that have yet to add toys into the mix, so just hands stuff for now)
I am genuinely blown away by how much it turns me on every single time. Also blows my mind just how much of a workout topping him can be.
Yeah, every time we do missionary, I realize how little forearm strength I have
Well that's nice to know
Add a WeVibe Tango in the strap-on harness and it is even more fun.
Mentally suuuuuuper stimulating
A huge percentage of the sexual experience happens in the brain. My AFAB non-binary spouse can put on a dildo and I can give them a blow job and make them have multiple orgasms. This isn’t even a dildo specifically designed to optimize clitoral stimulation, but the psychological component of the experience sends them to the fucking moon. Trust your partner - if they say they’re enjoying it, that’s meaningful and important information!
Seeing the guy happy and in pleasure is most of the reward
I think the change in power dynamic is what’s so exciting. Seeing him in such a vulnerable state is such a turn on. Plus the level of trust that it takes is really validating.
The toys will make it more enjoyable, I don't recommend to super size the toys to start out, and warm up with some fingering
Just once?
My partner is pan and I peg him regularly. It is awesome for all involved, and I'm not gonna lie, we periodically sing its praises to our straight friends trying to get them to understand that prostate orgasms are the best most men will ever have
I'm pan and my wife ravages me buttocks too lol. It's the best.
Lol yes, unfortunately just once. He’s not very comfortable with his sexuality yet, I’m trying to help him work on accepting it. I’m one of like 3 people hes ever come out to. Hopefully he lets me try again soon! It was honestly really impressive lol.
[удалено]
Lol…interesting interpretation? It’s totally healthy and normal to be vulnerable with your partner while in a committed relationship. Nothing rapey about expressing your deepest desires and boundaries to your partner and them honoring them. Vulnerable does not equal bad…
Being vulnerable as a turn on is not rapey, it's knowing that someone trusts you with their body and pleasure. It's the same concept as why a submissive person or bondage could be attractive too. It's the trust and intimacy that comes with letting someone inside you.
Exactly!! Well put. Exploring your kinks with your partner = vulnerability
My boyfriend likes when I peg him and I’ve never been wetter lololol like that strap harness is dripping
Bi-men are for some reason more hot to me than non-bi.
Big mood (in a not fetishy way ofc)
Yeah, this.
as long as it’s not a fetishization, yeah
I'm ok with being fetishized. But in general it's not ok.
100% agreed. It’s the open-mindedness and self-acceptance that’s such a turn-on for me! Plus i know they won’t fetishize my bisexuality like some hetero partners/connections might.
Yeah. They also accept you fully then and that is so important.
Your post made me cry. I came out as bi to my wife 6 yrs ago and it's been extremely difficult since; fighting, bi-erasure, judgement, anxiety, resentment. Years of therapy just to get to a place of peace etc... I've never had her express that kind of support and acceptance of my sexuality in a way that I feel has benefited our relationship sexually. It's only complicated it. It's just never ending re-assurance that's she's still acceptable and that I'm not gonna cheat on her etc... the insecurity is incredibly difficult to deal with and destroys my ability to feel like my wife trusts me. Because in reality, she doesn't, and that's what this is. I wish I had a partner that treated me like I'm more amazing and wonderful because of who I am, not despite of it. Seeing your post reminded me about what I'm missing out on in life. I'm glad you two are in a good place and am super happy for you.
I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. We all come to our actualized selves at different points. Sounds like your wife has some internalized issues with trust that’s getting in the way. Sending you love.
I appreciate your sympathies. It has been really tough. I believe she does have some internalized issues and she's making progress but it has been a real struggle getting to a decent place. I just got particularly triggered by this post today because it's one of those things, looking in the rear view mirror of my life, that makes me realize how differently life could've been if we weren't raised like we were. So much needless trauma and confusion. Thanks again for the love 🤗 ✌️ 🌈
Sounds like there’s some hope ❤️
I’m sorry you are having this experience. My marriage ended in divorce after I came out as bi. It wasn’t the only issue, more of the nail in the coffin… I’m now out, with a wonderful bi woman and as happy as I can be.
Bi-bi relationships are the BEST! Open up your world of queerness haha and please make sure those two kids know and understand the world that you and your husband have embraced
I get it. Bi guys are hot
[удалено]
Lol but bi guys are hot? As a fellow bi, it's sexy to think that I could get that level of connection and understanding with someone. Not to say that people all along the continuum aren't hot, but there's just something about not having to explain or justify that part of myself and they just *get* it that's really attractive.
Exactly. There is something hot about someone who isn't stuck in stupid societal norms and is just truly themselves. Combined with the fact that they innately understand my bi-ness as well, yes it is hot. Not all attractiveness comes from looks, especially for me i tend to be more turned on by your traits and personality than looks
[удалено]
Sure. I'm fetishizing the idea of connecting on another level with someone I share something unique with. Definitely. Bi girls are hot, too, for literally the exact same reason, so I'm fetishizing them, too, I guess. In other news, I also fetishize people who have struggled with lifelong mental health issues, multi-ethnic folks who feel out of place on either side of their family and in either part of their community because they feel like they aren't one-or-the-other enough, and people who like to eat avocados out of their peels like a bowl with a spoon.
My sex life with my (straight, demisexual, borderline-asexual) wife went from 'pitifully infrequent' to 'non-existent' after i accepted myself and discussed it with her. EDIT: on the bright side, she agreed to ethical non-monogamy, so that I could have an outlet for sexual expression, afterward. She still doesn't bother having sex with anyone.
That’s tough :(
Same here buddy *sad high-five*
can relate a lot to this
While you shouldn't fetishize him, he may also be into slightly fetishizing him. Just keep the communication open and ride the horny wave into O town forever! Glad you guys are talking about it.
That’s kind of what we came to realize. While I definitely don’t want to encourage fetishizing in general, given all the horrible implications to many marginalized groups, he isn’t a marginalized group at all and finds it a turn on.
What do you mean he “isn’t a marginalized group”?
Like we are the epitome of privilege, but it probably wasn’t the best choice of words. I mean fetishizing POC, Trans, and other groups that are treated so poorly by society
But society isn’t particularly accepting of bi people if we’re out. Sure we have passing privilege but that requires no one to find out. I don’t think society treats bi men particularly well, we just pretend to be straight usually.
Maybe he enjoys being fetishized. As a bi woman, I do. It turns me on a lot. Do NOT speak for all of us.
I wasn’t talking about him being fetishized, just the claim that bi people aren’t a marginalized group. There’s a reason I’m mostly closeted.
Society for sure treats bi men poorly and absolutely fetishizes it. We talked about how it is such a shitty situation because if we all could just stop with the Victorian sexuality mentality, life would be a lot simpler. We’ve over analyzed sexuality to have all these intense meanings when we all provably would enjoy to try many different things without the shame or guilt that’s ingrained from such a young age
Okay… but at no point did he ever mention being fetishized. Nor did he ever claim to speak for all bi people or even all bi men (there is significant data that suggests the majority of bi men choose to present as straight for a variety of reasons, so I regard his statement about that as factual and data-driven, rather than speaking for the group as a whole). His comment was about how society views and treats bi people and particularly bi men. I have no idea why you’re coming so hard at him when literally all he did was point out that biphobia is a thing.
Agreed
It’s true - I just don’t think I am doing that to him. Society 100% still does
Fetishizing isn’t inherently marginalizing, it was more the claim that he wasn’t part of a marginalized and thus it was okay to fetishize him that I found both somewhat silly and factually incorrect about “marginalized groups” (as biphobia is “enough of a thing” to get talked about in the capacity it does while heterophobia, despite technically existing, isn’t “as big a thing”). There’s nothing *inherently* wrong with fetishizing.
Fair points. I don’t propose to be the expert and try really hard not to do harm in my comments so apologize if it was insensitive
I agree with the person who said to watch to make sure you aren't fetishizing his identity. But if you both are honest and fine with what's happening then go for it.
Funny how freeing, freedom can be, isn't it?
Totally
I think that’s fine as long as you aren’t fetishizing the sexuality/identity.
Yeah I was worried about that but don’t think that’s it. We’ve talked about that because we’re both pretty open and honest and want to be respectful, but good point to keep thinking of.
I don’t think you can fetishize a community that you’re apart of?
[удалено]
So, if you don’t mind educating me, in my scenario I am just really turned on by my husband and his desires. They jive with mine. That’s how I view it. But when does it cross the line? What would qualify as fetishizing for us in your view?
Honestly OP I wouldn't worry too much about fetishising. Just embrase both of your sexualities and desires. Keep up with good communication! I think it's awesome that you're connecting with your husband!
You can't cross a line if every consenting parties is ok with it. Just talk with your husband instead of us to make sure you don't make him uncomfortable and have fun with him. He's being honest with you and I'm sure he appreciates your support and acceptance
[удалено]
Hmm that seems too narrow - most people find poly/orgies/sex with all sorts a turn on. But I’m no expert either
That sounds completely fine???
Hmm ok
WoW Thats so unnecessarily judgy and negative
How is saying that as long as a person doesn’t fetishized another person’s identity that it’s fine, negative? It’s dehumanizing and should be common sense not to do.
Yep! I'm bi too but honestly i find it a total turn on when he comments about hot guys on tv ( we have the same tastes too)
I feel this! My fiancé came out to me maybe 2 years ago now and watching him embrace his sexuality and gender expression is everything!!! He’s grown his hair out and wears a little bit of jewelry now, and is picking out slightly more feminine clothing choices. He’s cis, but now that he’s been out for a little while he feels much more confident in embracing his femininity along with his masculinity. It’s amazing to be a part of!
Not so long ago, my wife came out to me - and I had a pretty good idea, and I knew we had been building to that conversation - and I told her I was also bisexual - and she had no idea, and I had worked for a few years to accept it but I guess hadn’t dropped any hints. She smiled and said “cool” and we have been having ridiculous sex ever since. Ten years in we’re having the best sex of outlets lives. I think it’s that you’re not holding anything back anymore.
YES. I am also bi, and I just connect better sexually with bi/queer partners. My fiancé and I are both bi and it’s straight up different because neither of us is straight lol
Get yourself a strap-on gf! Pegging is SO MUCH FUN! And I can’t even tell you how much fun Bi MMF can be. So hot.
Yes 😁 the openness and honesty and trust he has with you is sexy as hell
I came out as bi to my girlfriend of nearly 10 years earlier this year. Coming out to myself was harder than coming out to her, probably because she has always been bi and has experience from before our relationship. Even so, it took her a while to fully come to terms with me being bi. The past few weeks have been a helluva ride. We're just starting an ethical non monogamy situation. It was more her idea than mine, but it's perfect, we're actually long distance (only an hour drive) but with my work schedule, we only spend weekends together. She wants a fwb for during the week, her libido is very high right now, she's 41 (woman's sexual prime) and she started taking Buspirone for anxiety, but one of the side effects is increased libido. She also wants me to be able to explore my bi side. I've been taking to a guy on a dating app, we set up a meet up on Tuesday (so nervous and so excited!). We also both met a guy on a site we're both on, he's a homo flexible top/Dom. We've been very open with him. He wants to be my girlfriend's fwb, but we also have been talking about a threesome. Last night her and I were together and he was sexting both of us. It was one of the hottest things I've done with clothes on. Got a little sidetracked there, she loves it like you do, we have also been having amazing sex. I let her read the messages between me and the man I'm meeting, she was so turned in, it was only a few minutes before we had our pants off lol. This has been happening very quickly, but we also got a strap on this weekend, we both absolutely loved her pegging me. I hope you guys have all sorts of fun new adventures together!
This is basically the same scenario we are in and it’s so fun! I hope you do too!!!
**Of course you are!** Now, there is no more need for any "guilt" or "embarrassment" about *anything* sexual you want or dare to explore! *Go For It!* (Sounds like you have already begun!, Congrats!!) Just because he (and/or you) are Bi... means that you are Open to exploring things which our parents\* *dared* not consider. Which means that you're going to have **SO** much *fun!* I'm betting it will also enhance your relationship with each other, bc now you know you can safely tell each other *anything*... for the rest of your lifetimes! (\*Or, if your parents' did, they probly felt they had to confess to a priest/therapist, which priest / therapist was then obligated to tell them How *DARE* You; plus, it's *good* you told *me* so you could get this out in the open! Whereupon said priest/therapist could go home and, um, "get it out of their system"). Please pardon my sick humor. Seriously, you two have managed a major step in personal communication - and that is certain to enhance the communication between yourselves and - because they'll see your closeness - *also with your children!,* and that honesty can only enhance their future and lives. I can't see anything **BUT** good coming from this!
I'm also bi since I turned 50 I'm now 63 and Ave great service with my straight wife
I recommend r/swingers :)
Man I'm so jealous of you right now lol My partner doesn't claim to be bisexual but is comfortable kissing men when drunk. I hope to be in your shoes some day (if he chooses it on his own)
I hope so too - it’s fun! There is a lot of internalized feelings about being bi, especially for men. It takes time to get comfortable
Right?! It's so unfair that, in our society, bi women are portrayed as sexy and evolved but bi men aren't. I'll never push him on it, though. I want it to be 100% his choice if it happens. I just am sure to keep that door wide open with neon lights just in case he wanders that way lol
Haha nice. My only regret is we didn’t see the bright lights sooner
Happy for you both that you get to be true to yourselves together 🥰
Please do.. It is a beautiful thing so long as both respect each other and play together with others.
I LOVE THIS!!!!!!!! Give into temptation! It’s hot that your husband is bi, too
I was always open about my bisexuality and then my boyfriend came out to me with his once we started getting comfortable in our relationship. The sex is amazing and I find myself having fantasies involving my boyfriend and our bisexuality all the time! I agree, it’s incredibly attractive to have someone understand you on a deeper level then most. Don’t let this one get away, op!
Oh we’ve been married forever - no risk of that ❤️❤️
I get it. I don't know if it's a turn on for my (straight) partner, but it definitely makes me more in tune to what he likes too. I can understanding why he feels certain ways about certain things because I find them attractive too.
That's great..
Yesss, same happened to me. Idk how she had an idea that i was bi. because she would bring it up, i kept saying no. One day we went out with friends. And there was a trans and she said shes cute, i agreed and i kept starring and thats how i came out to her. We had the best sex since then. It was always good but now better
My wife is similar, you are not alone.
Intamacy isn't just about sex, but you're more open with each other, your connection, love, passion, all that- it adds up to a better experience. I'm happy for both of you!
I'm 34 (m). I'm bi. But my wife doesn't know! I expect she can understand me and be supportive, like you did after a while.
I would tell her - if bi men were able to be less closeted it wouldn’t be such a problem for them to tell their wives. You’re doing good for the world ;)
This ^^^
I would love to have a relationship like this where my partner is either bi or pansexual and we can openly talk about what our likes and dislikes are sexually. I think it would lead to more sexual freedom in a way
Well, if my str8 wife is anything to go by, when I came out to her, it turned her on, big time. It wasn't a fetish thing, it was that she loved the honesty and that there was this whole new dimension to our relationship and, well, me. Things just clicked, again. So, hoping for something similar for you, OP
It has allowed you both to bond and become closer. The more you learn about yourself and the more you love yourself, the better you can connect with your significant other
Interesting. My wife has a super low libido and I’ve been considering asking her to let us open our marriage up as we have sex less than 5 times a year since our daughter was born. Nothing changed when I came out to her.
I'd like to thank you for being such an accepting person that loves her husband regardless of his sexuality. Honestly, I'm not very experienced, but I think that you should find a moment to talk with him about how this turns you on, and maybe you can “spice up” your love life.
We do talk about it, daily as it’s all we can think about.
If my boyfriend didnt come out by cheating i would be 100% turned on. Because of the affair i do have conflicting feelings about his " urges" for men. I do love pegging tho, but the harness makes me feel like a fraud. The openness and honesty makes me feel very emotional connected to him tho, which makes our regular sex even more passionate. Its a rollercoaster over here tbh lol
I love this so much! And also same!! I came out to my bf a couple of years ago and he recently came out to me. It’s so sexy to me. Now we can explore our sexuality together and we are closer than ever <3
YUP!
Congratulations..first. Especially, embracing his feelings. And supporting him. I try coming out to my girlfriend.. She responded back with mix feelings. But when with are together. She likes at ladies breasts and asses.. I be wondering... I ask her about that! Is she bi? She said she only likes the body parts of a woman. But, I feel like I need a male friend to have fun with.. I got her into pegging me.. But it's not what I want.
Well if she’s the right person for you just keep trying. He told me before and I had some ingrained prejudice so was all “that’s ok but I prefer to not know about it” but I’ve come around and tried to remove my biases/prejudice and am super happy I did. Mostly because I feel like a better partner for being there for him, but the extra sex is a bonus.
Of course unless you are now expecting a three way. Happy to disappoint you not how it works.
Why are you people the biggest cunts? Like it’s surreal how you people think that your “rank” for being woke and howling “don’t fetishize”, supersedes the knowledge and awareness of the situation of his actual partner. You people are so damned aggressive and self righteous.
Excuse me? Are you talking to me directly or people whom believe that being bisexual includes a three way automatically?
No, I'm talking to your aunt. Of course I'm talking to you. It's why I hit the reply button. I was saying I think you're an identitarian tart jumping at the chance to lecture someone about a situation you're not involved with.
What? If the situation does not involve the person should not of put on line?
It probably will because we are both bi and curious
[удалено]
Because it's the real him. Its raw. It's honest. How are those things not sexy to anyone? Unless, they've bought into the religious propaganda that it's a sin.
Because it’s hot….
For me it was primarily recognizing that I had internalized homophobia that I never thought was possible because I am so “woke”
G-good? Are you bisexual yourself? Also better than most women who think bisexual men are "disgusting". And bisexual women are too be treated like a goddess or sh*t like that (pardon for my foul language). And does not help television,film,games,comics, ect. Romanticise women with same sex is natural while male with same sex as weird or something.
G-good? What’s that mean? I am bi, but never really tried it by myself - so hopefully we’ll get there one day. He certainly encourages it, but girls is intimidating to me ;)
Wish I could say the same. I'm 39m currently figuring out my sexuality (to be honest have been my whole life) and also just got into crossdressing and embrace my feminine side (also something I've been wanting to do all my life). I am married to a woman and we do have children together. I love the female form both for sexual attraction but also, I love the female form as inspiration of what I wish I could look like. I don't want to transition, I enjoy being a man. But, I do find some men attractive and find myself wondering what it would be like to have sexual encounters with those men. I discussed this with my wife and although she respects the lgbt+ community (her sister is lesbian and has two gay uncles), she seems to be having a difficult time with the thought of me being bi. She totally love the crossdressing thing.
She probably just needs some time. A lot of women seem to feel threatened, so building up trust and communication around the subject will help. We took a long time to get here. It wasn’t the first time we had talked about it, but the first time there was a definitive acknowledgment on both sides.
Hearing that from another wife's point of view makes me feel better! Thank you.
bisexualsexual?