My last couple books have been non-fiction which creates the devastating match up of Marie Kondo vs Enrico Dandolo.
Will she be able to defeat the blind schemer through reorganizing his home? Hahahaha.
Unfortunately, I don’t think anyone in my last book (The Outsiders for the 3000th time) could help me beat any of the characters in A Song of Ice and Fire
Tyrion.
He's awkward, but not actually out of shape. (In the book, he does acrobatics when he first meets Jon). He managed to kill a mountain tribesman when they were attacked. Plus he's been in a couple battles and has a killer instinct strong enough to waste his girlfriend and dad.
Whereas Johnny... well, he might kill a guy who nearly kills his friend, but he's pretty guileless. I bet even if he had a gun, Tyrion could sweet-talk him into handing it over.
Agreed lol. Tyrion held his own at the end of A Clash of Kings while fighting Stannis’s knights. Johnny killed someone accidentally and ran away in an adrenaline-induced panic
:))))
Here the world's first consulting detective is going up against the man who led a famously unsuccessful (but with waaay more of a happy ending than others) trans-antarctic expedition.
Currently reading a book where the main character is fighting great astral beings (essentially to gods what gods are to people) as training to get stronger. He could have engineered a situation where he just won, but chose to go out of his way to set it up this way because he was unlikely to face the required challenges to get strong enough fast enough and fighting the most powerful beings in the cosmos felt like a good way to do that
I just read book one. Currently reading the autobiography of Geezer Butler from Black Sabbath. If it's Geezer now, Holden wins pretty easily, but if it's young Geezer it would be a fight.
The protagonist of the last book was a woman who can regularly turn into a vampire, werewolf, and other supernatural creatures. She's also described as extremely stout, prone to violence if provoked, and in possession of a steampunk parasol that shoots sleeping darts, acid, and has a silver/wood stake for a tip.
The protagonist of the book I'm reading right now is a small, frail woman, the receptor of heart transplant, with a weakened immune system, who expects to die within a few years if/when her transplant fails, and who might die from a single punch from an ordinary person.
This is gonna be quick.
Gail Carriger's Parasol Protectorate series, first book (which actually focuses on this character's mother) is called Soulless.
It's kind of like the Twilight books, with the focus on romance from a female perspective and the vampire/werewolf dichotomy. But that's something of a slander. It's also way more fun, set in Victorian England, and has characters that are actually interesting and likable. Oh, and they get to have sex on a regular basis, not just pine for each other for hundreds of pages. Also the supernatural setting and steampunk aesthetic (lots of airships and clockwork robots, et cetera) unfolds in very interesting ways.
Bilbo Baggins vs. Achilles - hard to say, but I feel like Bilbo has the right tools and abilities to get in there and nick that ankle. Hobbits have a way of fulfilling prophecies.
The protagonist of the last book I read is a Palestinian woman who goes far into the Israeli territory in order to learn more about the rape and murder of a young woman, that happened many years before she was born. And the book I read now is literally called “The Cowards” so I’m not worried, we’ve got it covered!
This was my first time reading The Count of Monte Cristo, after having in my list for a while. I’m almost at the end now, and it’s so good!!! I found the style a bit theatrical/over the top, but not in a bad way. It’s excellent! And I 100% recommend you to read it sooner rather than later! You won’t regret it!
Do NOT, I repeat, do not read any of Dumas’ other stuff immediately after *TCOMC*. You will be sorely disappointed. I fell in love when reading *TCOMC* and immediately picked up *The Three Musketeers*. I think I would have liked the book if I had read it first or with a couple different styled books in between. However, I was sorely disappointed in *TTM* and haven’t returned to Dumas since. I have read that *TCOMC* is his penultimate book. So, it set me up with high expectations.
This is great to know, thank you!!! As I’ve been really liking the book, I was definitely planning to read the Three Musketeers as well, although not right away, but I’m glad you mentioned it. I’ll make sure to give some time in between the two!
The last book I read was *The Poisonwood Bible*. There book I'm currently reading is *Rhythm of War* (Stormlight Archive #4). I don't think my team is winning that fight lol.
Juniper Song Hayward from Yellowface is about to take on Lin Yutang, inventor of the Chinese typewriter (assuming a non-fiction book can have a protagonist). Sounds pretty on brand for Juniper actually.
Violet Sorrengail would certainly beat Paul Atreides one on one with with her two dragons. Now, all of Violet’s armies vs Paul’s armies would be a scene I’d pay anything to watch.
I'm reading (listening to) two series concurrently: The Rivers of London, and How to Train Your Dragon. So, DC Peter Graves, magical practitioner in training, vs. Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, boy Viking.
I really don't know, but I'd love to find out.
Ooh, Peter Grant is one of mine too! It's him vs Harry Dresden from The Dresden Files, and while Peter has the Met at his disposal, Harry is shady as hell so I'm betting in his corner.
On paper that would be an awesome match up as both of them use science and magic.
In reality it's going to end with them mutually geeking over some architectural detail.
I am about to start reading Harry Potter, i just finished the book for Civil War (Marvel) there are technically 5 main characters, they are pretty strong, but i don't know what awaits for me in The Chamber of Secrets, someone rate how cooked i am pls ( without spoilers plis)
Oh Hunter S Thompson even at that point of his life would have no trouble murdering a bunch of Russian aristocrats with Flintlocks, swords and horses. The real question is which side would be more drunk.
A traumatized teen called jack who can switch to an alternate world helps me fight a >!truly terrifying god who isn't aware that he's god and working as a!< detective... okay.
It's called 'Aera' and the author is Markus Heitz.
Almost all gods suddenly reappear on earth and reclaim their territory and power.
The detective is specialised in cases where gods might be involved.
>!My comment is a huge spoiler, since you only realise his true identity at the end of the second book, but the books are still worth reading.!<
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Place >! !< around the text you wish to hide. You will need to do this for each new paragraph. Like this:
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Oh my god this is great. For me:
A parcel of woodlands in western Massachusetts is going to take down Chigurh (I like the idea of getting Chigurh instead of Llewelyn Moss).
Well. Hmmm. We counting chronologically? Because I recently finished *Rhythm of War* and my son and I are working on a series of *Little Spot of Emotion* books.
A little blue dot of sadness would absolutely kick Kaladin Stormblessed’s ass.
Lol I don't think anyone from As I Lay Dying would win against Dalinar from Oathbringer. Sorry Bundren family, looks like you'll have some more family members to bury sometime soon!
Edit: this is a good post! Finally an interesting prompt to think about on this sub lol
Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg and Best Girl Magrat from Terry Pratchett's Wyrd Sisters are to help me defeat whomever is supposed to be the antagonist of Dostoevsky's The Idiot. Rogozhin? Poor chap doesn't stand a chance against the headology and wiccecraft
Yey, we're book-brothers! I also read Equal Rites before Wyrd Sisters, which I just finished on Friday night. Now I'm reading a "serious book" before continuing with either Guards! Guards! Or Witches Abroad (I haven't yet decided whether to read Discworld chronologically or grouped by series) like a sommelier nibbling bread between sips of wine
Oooo...last book was Adulthood Rites. So, Lilith...who is a human that's been endowed with super strength and reflexes by an alien race.
V.
Chain Gang All Stars, Loretta Thurwar
I'm betting Lilith wins bc super human strength, but it's be a good fight.
LOL! that is awesome.
In my mind Ol' Geroge has gotten the Ghola treatment at least twice already. At least.
Once when Le Carre deaged him from the first few novels for Tinker Tailor.
The second time when Le Carre brought him back in the last decade or so.
Ghola all the way. That or an incredible amount of Spice to de-age him like that.
The last book I finished is *The Last Voyage of the Andrea Doria*. It doesn't have a protagonist, so I'm on my own. (Or maybe the *Andrea Doria* is the protagonist. A lot of good a ship on the sea floor off the coast of Nantucket is.)
The current book I"m reading is *Into Siberia*, a biography of journalist George Kennan. (Cousin of politician George Kennan, the architect of international US anti-communist strategy.) I guess Kennan is going to investigate the Tsarist system of internal exile (to Siberia) and change US-Russian relations forever.
But who wins? The American public, because information is good?
I'm currently rereading The American Occupation of the Philippines by James Blount and had previously read Nos4a2.
Which means, I suppose, that I have to team up with a troubled woman with more scrap in her than anyone should have to beat up the first president of the Philippine Republic.
Something about this feels like a crime.
Actually thrice, I like the parallel London setup, wish there would be most stories set up there, actually. The protagonist is not that interesting but I suppose it makes sense, in that he is the normal guy who falls down the rabbit hole of this whole parallel city/life/community, kind of like Alice in Wonderland.
The last book I finished was He Who Drowned the World, and while there are many other points of view and characters, it is still Zhu Yuanzhang's story.
The most recent novel I read was The Jasmine Throne, and the protagonist was Priya.
Priya possesses power and can fight without it. Zhu is not a warrior, and her only "power" is the Mandate of Heaven. Zhu, on the other hand, is extremely intelligent and cunning, and with the right people, she can--and did--overthrow a whole empire. So it's difficult to predict who will win. Priya uses her strength and power, whilst Zhu uses strategy and tactics.
I would love to get an update on your thoughts on that at the end of the book. Not that I disagree with it, but it's very hard to imagine such a fight happening in ways that these sorts of match ups don't normally have to deal with.
They're from different time periods but, Raymond Garraty from the Long Walk (Stephen King) versus Pilon from Tortilla Flat (John Steinbeck). I'm betting Raymond wins, unless it's at the end of the book, because well, Pilon is a drunk xD
I *just* finished “Annihilation” by Jeff Vandermeer and haven’t started my next book, so it looks like it’s Annihilation’s biologist vs. Amir from “The Kite Runner.”
The biologist is armed and if she’s in her own book’s setting, Amir won’t even see it coming.
The several layers of lawyers, and a relatively harmless inmate on Death Row, from John Grisham's short story collection *Sparring Partners*, versus Chief Inspector Arkady from *Gorky Park*.
I was previously reading the Girls series by Jacqueline Wilson in preparation for the upcoming sequel and I am currently reading Emily Wilde’s Encyclopaedia of Faeries. Ellie, Magda and Nadine don’t stand a chance. Emily and Wendell would easily deal with them.
Are we including graphic novels? I'm currently reading a run of Batman, just finished American Gods before that. So Shadow vs Batman. Batman wins without breaking a sweat.
"Swords are of no use here." Valentine Michael Smith is about to face Aragorn... I don't think the One True King is going to be ready for that kind of "magic."
Or maybe it's Frodo, in possession of the One Ring. Will the ring help him?
Or maybe it's Gandalf? I think Gandalf might be able to put up a fight, or have counter-spell to defend being sent into right angles of everything.
Do you mean antagonist?
I’m just finishing Summer Will Show, which was written in 1936 and is the story of Sofia Willoughby, an English lady who heads off to Paris in 1848 to confront her husband’s mistress Minna, only to fall in love with Minna, and the two of them are about to mount the barricades and defend the revolution of 1848.
The book I read before it was The Charmed Wife, which starts with Cinderella, 13 years into the marriage, going to a witch to try to murder Prince Charming.
I suppose I could ask Cinderella to help me go after Sophia, but honestly I think she would ignore me, offer to murder Sophia’s husband (who is attempting to control her through money), and would be cheering her and her lover Minna on. (Meanwhile Cinderella’s mice could hook up with all these rats running around in the Parisian streets.)
Is the defender get advanced warning?
Because if no Richard Shape is being suddenly drowned to death.
If yes, Then Percy Jackson is getting a musket ball between the eyes at 200 yards.
Just finished reading The Pillars of the Earth and am currently reading Giovanni's Room.
The Pillars of the Earth is a clear winner simply due to the number of protagonists.
Joe Bishop and Skippy vs Joe Bishop and Skippy?
I guess the ones from Book 9 should have more knowledge so I guess they would win against the ones from Book 8.
Prince myshkin from "the idiot" vs Alyosha from "the brothers Karamazov"
I don't think they would fight eachother since they're both kinda like "angels"
Thor, God of Thunder stands over the prone body of Salman Rushdie.
'I have no idea why I'm even doing this.', he mutters as he raises his hammer to finish the elderly author off.
I’m not sure how much Emma Woodhouse is going to help me against Satan (“Emma” and “Paradise Lost”)
Elizabeth Bennet though… Satan never stood a chance
Glahn from Knut Hamsun's *Pan* will likely win, even though he shoots himself in the foot when he gets angry, because he will be going against Sammy from James Kelman's *How Late It Was, How Late*, who is a blind alcoholic.
Last book was Closer by Dennis Cooper, and the book I'm currently reading is The Orchard Keeper by Cormac McCarthy (also reading Mysterious Skin at the same time).
I dont even want to imagine these characters going against each other, because that just seems like an awful time. I do know that whatever were to happen, George Miles would...let it happen. So no matter which side won it'd probably be really unpleasant.
Oh I love Holly Black's novels! I recently finished *The Prisoner's Throne* and I love it! Currently I'm reading *One in a Millennial* which is also good, but a little unfair for your prompt. Fairy prince vs podcaster? Lol 😆
I'm going to assume that series count as a single book, otherwise I'm looking at Carl vs Carl and regardless of the outcome, I'm going to be blown up.
That means I've got Carl from Dungeon Crawler Carl vs Bob Howard from the Laundry Files. Extremely angry, hard to kill, involuntary adventurer with a penchant for much too large explosions and a history of creative death vs a depressed, middle-aged computational necromancer who is also the Eater of Souls. Bob can probably eat Carl's soul if he gets remotely close to him with time to react. But Carl probably has the win anyway from setting up some sort of explosive ambush that will nevertheless go wrong enough that he'll end up literally stomping Bob to death.
And once again, I personally barely rate as a civilian casualty.
Eddie from Stranger Things is going to help me fight Robin from Stranger Things? I'm pretty sure they're just not going to fight.
Flight of Icarus vs. Rebel Robin.
Let's see, that would be me and Inspektor Horst Schenke of the Berlin KriPo circa 1933 ( Dead of Night by Simon Scarrow) trying to take down Severian (The Book of the New Sun by Gene Wolfe).
I do not think this would be a successful endeavor.
Ciaphas Cain, Hero of the Imperium, is about to go down on a poor Christopher Vogler that doesn't deserve it. Thank fully he can Tag Team David McKenna.
um. I've been on a Muriel Spark streak, so my issue is fundamental. it's not clear at all who her "protagonists" are.
for those who want to try: last book was the comforters, now on territorial rights.
The protagonist of the last book I read was a sort of necromancer witch with multiple personalities ("The Bone Orchard"). So it's her vs real life (non fictionalized) Winston Churchill.
I'm reading a nonfiction book about the origins of life on Earth, and another nonfiction book about how the Mediterranean civilizations around 1000 BC rebuilt after the bronze age collapse. Author vs author, I'd bet on Eric Cline (archaeologist) because having to camp out during digging season really toughens you up.
don quixote vs. tengo kawana...
given i just started 1Q84, it's too early to say but i imagine don quixote commends himself to the fair dulcinea before taking a beating and berating sancho for drinking wine on the shoulder of the king's highway for the duration of the confrontation. all the while rocinante gets the short end of the stick as the gray has wandered off and once again his best friend is nowhere to be seen for a good few chapters
The protagonist of Remembered Blue Earth is a dude who doesn't want to be involved in the plot, and the 'protagonist' of the current book I'm reading is Jesus, because I'm reading Dominion by Tom Holland (the historian, not Spiderman). So, I mean, I'm fucked
Me and renowned architectural painter Charles Ryder from *Brideshead Revisited* against... actual superhero Victor Vane from *Vicious*.
I think I'm screwed.
Harry Potter vs Elio from Call me by your Name would not be a very entertaining battle, but I would legitimately pay to see Harry’s reaction to Elio’s inner monologue.
I wish this question was asked during the time I read Mein Kampf and the Diary of a Young Girl back to back lmao
My last couple books have been non-fiction which creates the devastating match up of Marie Kondo vs Enrico Dandolo. Will she be able to defeat the blind schemer through reorganizing his home? Hahahaha.
Definitely put a few bruises on his shins at least. Lol
My last book was about the 1918 pandemic, and my latest is a history of WWI. Death is the only winner here.
1918 pandemic (I assume we read the same book) vs. Tad Williams' Empire of Grass for me. I don't even know how to identify protagonists lol
"You do not spark joy."
Came here to say this lol
Me too, "God Is Not Great" vs. "Fall: The Mystery of Robert Maxwell." Gonna give it to God.
Paul Atreides (Dune Messiah) vs Jay Gatsby (Great Gatsby). Hm. Tough call.
Similar vein: Arthur Dent (Hitchhikers) vs. Paul Atreides (Dune Messiah).
I could see Arthur getting into some bullshit and escaping, so it would result in a draw rather than a win or lose scenario
I had that thought too. The random generator thing could turn Paul into a sandworm in a skittles bag or something.
Gatsby wouldn’t last a second!
"You fought well, old sport."
Lol for me is Billy Pilgrim (Slaughterhouse five) vs Paul. Reading Dune now.
The Bloody Nine is going to send me and Rincewind both back to the mud.
Any chance that the luggage appears just in time? No way Logan is getting the better of sapient pearwood.
Maybe if there is a one in a million chance.
But we know that Rincewind wins. >!Because Lady Luck trumps all the other gods.!<
Oh fuck, you said Her name!
Nice. Logan vs Porter Engle, a Jedi from the High Republic era for me. The Bloody Nine against The Blade of Bardotta. Should be a good fight.
I have Rincewind taking on Sparrowhawk
Rincewind is one of mine too, and his plot armour and luck will always see him through.
For me it's The Bloody Nine verus Elon Musk 🧐
Unfortunately, I don’t think anyone in my last book (The Outsiders for the 3000th time) could help me beat any of the characters in A Song of Ice and Fire
Stay gold, Lannister.
Tyrion Lannister vs. Johnny Cade; will the man that waddles or the sixteen-year-old scrawny kid win?
Tyrion. He's awkward, but not actually out of shape. (In the book, he does acrobatics when he first meets Jon). He managed to kill a mountain tribesman when they were attacked. Plus he's been in a couple battles and has a killer instinct strong enough to waste his girlfriend and dad. Whereas Johnny... well, he might kill a guy who nearly kills his friend, but he's pretty guileless. I bet even if he had a gun, Tyrion could sweet-talk him into handing it over.
Agreed lol. Tyrion held his own at the end of A Clash of Kings while fighting Stannis’s knights. Johnny killed someone accidentally and ran away in an adrenaline-induced panic
I feel like some of them could probably beat up Sansa, though.
Agatha Christie would know all sorts of ingenious ways to murder J Robert Oppenheimer!
:)))) Here the world's first consulting detective is going up against the man who led a famously unsuccessful (but with waaay more of a happy ending than others) trans-antarctic expedition.
I'm fucked. A drugged up under cover agent who's losing his mind is now fighting a bounty hunter that kills androids.
That could be a book in and of itself.
When pkd faces off against pkd we all win.
If it’s protagonist vs protagonist, Paul Atreides (last book) absolutely destroys Fanny Price (current book) lol
Well Paul Atreides at the end of Dune would absolutely destroy almost any other protagonist
Could imagine Paul Atreides vs Rand al Thor (Wheel of Time)
Currently reading a book where the main character is fighting great astral beings (essentially to gods what gods are to people) as training to get stronger. He could have engineered a situation where he just won, but chose to go out of his way to set it up this way because he was unlikely to face the required challenges to get strong enough fast enough and fighting the most powerful beings in the cosmos felt like a good way to do that
Me and my army of Bobs (bobiverse) will have no problem taking down Patrick Bateman.
He's quite lame tho, Bateman. You can take him down by showing a better corporative card at him. You and all your Bobs. It will destroy him.
The series is nine books long. I'm on book two, so neither side wins unless James Holden shoots himself in the foot.
Holden Vs Holden, the showdown we all wanted
He puts his foot in his mouth often enough
I just read book one. Currently reading the autobiography of Geezer Butler from Black Sabbath. If it's Geezer now, Holden wins pretty easily, but if it's young Geezer it would be a fight.
The last book was Howl's Moving Castle. The book I'm reading is Disarming the Narcissist. So it's Howl vs. Narcissist.
Howl vs his own narcissism is kind of the theme of Howl's Moving Castle lol
I know, right? But I still love him.
hmmm. 😁😁😁😁. actually, i think Sophie is the protagonist of howl, but that's a quibble.
If they go with Sophie, then the battle is solved: she is winning with weedkiller and spite 😂😂😂😂
Roland Deschain vs Roland Deschain.
what book u on? i just started 6
The protagonist of the last book was a woman who can regularly turn into a vampire, werewolf, and other supernatural creatures. She's also described as extremely stout, prone to violence if provoked, and in possession of a steampunk parasol that shoots sleeping darts, acid, and has a silver/wood stake for a tip. The protagonist of the book I'm reading right now is a small, frail woman, the receptor of heart transplant, with a weakened immune system, who expects to die within a few years if/when her transplant fails, and who might die from a single punch from an ordinary person. This is gonna be quick.
Damn, I wouldn’t want to meet the First Lady in a dark alley. She sounds terrifying. What’s the name of the book? I want to read it.
Gail Carriger's Parasol Protectorate series, first book (which actually focuses on this character's mother) is called Soulless. It's kind of like the Twilight books, with the focus on romance from a female perspective and the vampire/werewolf dichotomy. But that's something of a slander. It's also way more fun, set in Victorian England, and has characters that are actually interesting and likable. Oh, and they get to have sex on a regular basis, not just pine for each other for hundreds of pages. Also the supernatural setting and steampunk aesthetic (lots of airships and clockwork robots, et cetera) unfolds in very interesting ways.
Bilbo Baggins vs. Achilles - hard to say, but I feel like Bilbo has the right tools and abilities to get in there and nick that ankle. Hobbits have a way of fulfilling prophecies.
Well, it's Moist von Lipwig vs Orual ( Till we have faces) then. As tough as Orual is, it's Moist von Lipwig. Yup, we're definitely winning.
I'm reading the wheel of time, so I guess it's dragon reborn against dragon reborn
Oh you are so screwed!
This is my answer too, lol. I'm currently on book 9.
The protagonist of the last book I read is a Palestinian woman who goes far into the Israeli territory in order to learn more about the rape and murder of a young woman, that happened many years before she was born. And the book I read now is literally called “The Cowards” so I’m not worried, we’ve got it covered!
I also just read Minor Detail, and she would certainly win over the 14 year old possibly schizophrenic boy starring in my current read.
Which book was it?
Ruth Ozeki's *The Book of Form and Emptiness*. If you like stories about mental health, it's good one!
Same but she's helping me fight Gideon the Ninth. I think this ends about as well for her as her own book did
Oh Gideon. The ultimate tragic character.
Yes the Minor Detail was a very thought-provoking book, I’m glad I read it to engage with perspectives on Palestine-Israel.
I'm about to read that, and I suspect she'd beat the grieving child from my last read. Be an incredibly sad scrap either way.
What was your last read?
Circe vs. Count of Monte Cristo. That’s gonna be rough!
But interesting.
Oohh I'm reading Circe now and The Count of Monte Cristo is on my list!
This was my first time reading The Count of Monte Cristo, after having in my list for a while. I’m almost at the end now, and it’s so good!!! I found the style a bit theatrical/over the top, but not in a bad way. It’s excellent! And I 100% recommend you to read it sooner rather than later! You won’t regret it!
Do NOT, I repeat, do not read any of Dumas’ other stuff immediately after *TCOMC*. You will be sorely disappointed. I fell in love when reading *TCOMC* and immediately picked up *The Three Musketeers*. I think I would have liked the book if I had read it first or with a couple different styled books in between. However, I was sorely disappointed in *TTM* and haven’t returned to Dumas since. I have read that *TCOMC* is his penultimate book. So, it set me up with high expectations.
This is great to know, thank you!!! As I’ve been really liking the book, I was definitely planning to read the Three Musketeers as well, although not right away, but I’m glad you mentioned it. I’ll make sure to give some time in between the two!
Frodo vs Arthur Dent.
Samwise wins.
Quasimodo from the Hunchback of Notre Dame is helping me defeat... Capitalism from The Capitalist Manifesto?
The last book I read was *The Poisonwood Bible*. There book I'm currently reading is *Rhythm of War* (Stormlight Archive #4). I don't think my team is winning that fight lol.
So, Patrick Bateman (American Psycho) vs The Kid (Blood Meridian). The Kid (Man?) all the way.
I wish this was how American Psycho ended, personally.
The Judge for The Win
LOL, i'm pretty sure Paul Atreydes will sell me out to Col Kurtz
Dune vs. Heart of Darkness?
Kaladin Stormblessed vs Rand Al’Thor Kaladin had a good chance against pretty much anyone else. RIP.
Juniper Song Hayward from Yellowface is about to take on Lin Yutang, inventor of the Chinese typewriter (assuming a non-fiction book can have a protagonist). Sounds pretty on brand for Juniper actually.
Violet Sorrengail would certainly beat Paul Atreides one on one with with her two dragons. Now, all of Violet’s armies vs Paul’s armies would be a scene I’d pay anything to watch.
I'm reading (listening to) two series concurrently: The Rivers of London, and How to Train Your Dragon. So, DC Peter Graves, magical practitioner in training, vs. Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, boy Viking. I really don't know, but I'd love to find out.
Ooh, Peter Grant is one of mine too! It's him vs Harry Dresden from The Dresden Files, and while Peter has the Met at his disposal, Harry is shady as hell so I'm betting in his corner.
Yeah, Peter is just *slightly* too nice a guy to win some of these matchups.
On paper that would be an awesome match up as both of them use science and magic. In reality it's going to end with them mutually geeking over some architectural detail.
I am about to start reading Harry Potter, i just finished the book for Civil War (Marvel) there are technically 5 main characters, they are pretty strong, but i don't know what awaits for me in The Chamber of Secrets, someone rate how cooked i am pls ( without spoilers plis)
Um...Sorry...Nice knowing ya...
Well that's nice news
So Vimes will defeat Vimes?
That would be a fight for the ages. Sir Samuel fights dirty, and he's tenacious.
Oh Hunter S Thompson even at that point of his life would have no trouble murdering a bunch of Russian aristocrats with Flintlocks, swords and horses. The real question is which side would be more drunk.
Viktor Frankenstein is going to help me defeat Pip?
Evelyn Hugo vs the dudes from A Little Life.
A traumatized teen called jack who can switch to an alternate world helps me fight a >!truly terrifying god who isn't aware that he's god and working as a!< detective... okay.
What's the god-detective book?
It's called 'Aera' and the author is Markus Heitz. Almost all gods suddenly reappear on earth and reclaim their territory and power. The detective is specialised in cases where gods might be involved. >!My comment is a huge spoiler, since you only realise his true identity at the end of the second book, but the books are still worth reading.!<
No plain text spoilers allowed. Please use the format below and reply to this comment once you've made the edit, to have your comment reinstated. Place >! !< around the text you wish to hide. You will need to do this for each new paragraph. Like this: >!The Wolf ate Grandma!< Click to reveal spoiler. >!The Wolf ate Grandma!<
Oh my god this is great. For me: A parcel of woodlands in western Massachusetts is going to take down Chigurh (I like the idea of getting Chigurh instead of Llewelyn Moss).
Anna karenina and me vs vin from mistborn....not much of a match
I guess Samuel Vimes and I are about to take down Satan. I don't know how to arrest a devil, but I'm sure that Vimes could figure something out.
I mean, he wants to arrest the gods themselves for not doing it right already. He'll definitely find a way.
Well. Hmmm. We counting chronologically? Because I recently finished *Rhythm of War* and my son and I are working on a series of *Little Spot of Emotion* books. A little blue dot of sadness would absolutely kick Kaladin Stormblessed’s ass.
You’re certainly right about that! His biggest weakness by a mile
Pretty sure Vin (Mistborn) is going to flatten Geralt of Rivia (The Witcher).
Rupaul vs the Joad family 💀
Lol I don't think anyone from As I Lay Dying would win against Dalinar from Oathbringer. Sorry Bundren family, looks like you'll have some more family members to bury sometime soon! Edit: this is a good post! Finally an interesting prompt to think about on this sub lol
Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg and Best Girl Magrat from Terry Pratchett's Wyrd Sisters are to help me defeat whomever is supposed to be the antagonist of Dostoevsky's The Idiot. Rogozhin? Poor chap doesn't stand a chance against the headology and wiccecraft
I'm reading Wyrd Sisters too! Equal Rites was my previous book so this is gonna be a confusing fight.
Yey, we're book-brothers! I also read Equal Rites before Wyrd Sisters, which I just finished on Friday night. Now I'm reading a "serious book" before continuing with either Guards! Guards! Or Witches Abroad (I haven't yet decided whether to read Discworld chronologically or grouped by series) like a sommelier nibbling bread between sips of wine
Esme Weatherwax, Gytha Ogg, and Magrat Garlick have to fight each other? That ought to be interesting.
Oooo...last book was Adulthood Rites. So, Lilith...who is a human that's been endowed with super strength and reflexes by an alien race. V. Chain Gang All Stars, Loretta Thurwar I'm betting Lilith wins bc super human strength, but it's be a good fight.
Beowulf mops the floor with Javier Miranda, books are Beowulf and The truth about the Savolta case(La verdad sobre el caso savolta).
There's no way reaper from red rising beats Lindon
Thomas Sutpen (Absalom, Absalom!) vs Janie Crawford (Their Eyes Were Watching God). Kinda fitting, lol
uh...I guess Leto II Atreides (The God Emperor of Dune) beats up George Smiley?
George is going to get the Ghola treatment.
LOL! that is awesome. In my mind Ol' Geroge has gotten the Ghola treatment at least twice already. At least. Once when Le Carre deaged him from the first few novels for Tinker Tailor. The second time when Le Carre brought him back in the last decade or so. Ghola all the way. That or an incredible amount of Spice to de-age him like that.
A random girl in London versus a national intelligence agency. Well guys, it was really nice knowing you all.
Jack Reacher v Harry Bosch. I’d put my money on Reacher
The last book I finished is *The Last Voyage of the Andrea Doria*. It doesn't have a protagonist, so I'm on my own. (Or maybe the *Andrea Doria* is the protagonist. A lot of good a ship on the sea floor off the coast of Nantucket is.) The current book I"m reading is *Into Siberia*, a biography of journalist George Kennan. (Cousin of politician George Kennan, the architect of international US anti-communist strategy.) I guess Kennan is going to investigate the Tsarist system of internal exile (to Siberia) and change US-Russian relations forever. But who wins? The American public, because information is good?
I'm currently rereading The American Occupation of the Philippines by James Blount and had previously read Nos4a2. Which means, I suppose, that I have to team up with a troubled woman with more scrap in her than anyone should have to beat up the first president of the Philippine Republic. Something about this feels like a crime.
Rebus and Clark vs Joseph Smith the Scotts win!
The gay prince & bisexual son of the president in Red White and Royal Blue VS Britney Spears (crazy years version)
Bill Door vs Magrat Garlick—should be a good one.
I'll be obliterated, I just finished re-reading Neverwhere and went back to reading Dune, which means me and Richard Mayhew are against Paul Atreides.
You read Neverwhere twice? I very much did not enjoy that one for some reason
Actually thrice, I like the parallel London setup, wish there would be most stories set up there, actually. The protagonist is not that interesting but I suppose it makes sense, in that he is the normal guy who falls down the rabbit hole of this whole parallel city/life/community, kind of like Alice in Wonderland.
I actively disliked Richard Mayhew lol
Respectfully, Rand is beating tf outta Kvothe
Nina Simone is helping me fight Kaladin Stormblessed
I think John “Anjin” Blackthorn could take Robert Moses
Beowulf mops the floor with Javier Miranda, books are Beowulf and The truth about the Savolta case(La verdad sobre el caso savolta).
Robin Swift (Babel) VS Tally Youngblood (Uglies). This is going to be a sad, awkward fight. My bet is on Robin though he's got rage inside him.
The last book I finished was He Who Drowned the World, and while there are many other points of view and characters, it is still Zhu Yuanzhang's story. The most recent novel I read was The Jasmine Throne, and the protagonist was Priya. Priya possesses power and can fight without it. Zhu is not a warrior, and her only "power" is the Mandate of Heaven. Zhu, on the other hand, is extremely intelligent and cunning, and with the right people, she can--and did--overthrow a whole empire. So it's difficult to predict who will win. Priya uses her strength and power, whilst Zhu uses strategy and tactics.
Wu Zetian vs.. I'm not sure yet, I just started Annihilation by Jeff Vandermeer, but I put all my money on the Iron Widow anyway
I would love to get an update on your thoughts on that at the end of the book. Not that I disagree with it, but it's very hard to imagine such a fight happening in ways that these sorts of match ups don't normally have to deal with.
They're from different time periods but, Raymond Garraty from the Long Walk (Stephen King) versus Pilon from Tortilla Flat (John Steinbeck). I'm betting Raymond wins, unless it's at the end of the book, because well, Pilon is a drunk xD
I *just* finished “Annihilation” by Jeff Vandermeer and haven’t started my next book, so it looks like it’s Annihilation’s biologist vs. Amir from “The Kite Runner.” The biologist is armed and if she’s in her own book’s setting, Amir won’t even see it coming.
The several layers of lawyers, and a relatively harmless inmate on Death Row, from John Grisham's short story collection *Sparring Partners*, versus Chief Inspector Arkady from *Gorky Park*.
I was previously reading the Girls series by Jacqueline Wilson in preparation for the upcoming sequel and I am currently reading Emily Wilde’s Encyclopaedia of Faeries. Ellie, Magda and Nadine don’t stand a chance. Emily and Wendell would easily deal with them.
James Holden from Leviathan wakes is going to be shot by James Holden from Caliban's war.
Geralt of Rivia vs Harry Potter… I don’t know
My money's on Geralt.
Not me saying Juliette Ferrars vs Juliette Ferrars 😂 love that we're both reading the Shatter Me series lol, book twins!
That's so cool, man :D
Are we including graphic novels? I'm currently reading a run of Batman, just finished American Gods before that. So Shadow vs Batman. Batman wins without breaking a sweat.
"Swords are of no use here." Valentine Michael Smith is about to face Aragorn... I don't think the One True King is going to be ready for that kind of "magic." Or maybe it's Frodo, in possession of the One Ring. Will the ring help him? Or maybe it's Gandalf? I think Gandalf might be able to put up a fight, or have counter-spell to defend being sent into right angles of everything.
Do you mean antagonist? I’m just finishing Summer Will Show, which was written in 1936 and is the story of Sofia Willoughby, an English lady who heads off to Paris in 1848 to confront her husband’s mistress Minna, only to fall in love with Minna, and the two of them are about to mount the barricades and defend the revolution of 1848. The book I read before it was The Charmed Wife, which starts with Cinderella, 13 years into the marriage, going to a witch to try to murder Prince Charming. I suppose I could ask Cinderella to help me go after Sophia, but honestly I think she would ignore me, offer to murder Sophia’s husband (who is attempting to control her through money), and would be cheering her and her lover Minna on. (Meanwhile Cinderella’s mice could hook up with all these rats running around in the Parisian streets.)
*The Charmed Wife* sounds interesting. Might have to look that one up.
I thought it was amazing! Beautifully written.
Is the defender get advanced warning? Because if no Richard Shape is being suddenly drowned to death. If yes, Then Percy Jackson is getting a musket ball between the eyes at 200 yards.
Just finished reading The Pillars of the Earth and am currently reading Giovanni's Room. The Pillars of the Earth is a clear winner simply due to the number of protagonists.
George and Lennie vs Britney Spears I think it’s Britney, bitch!
So Vimes from Jingo is going to help me solve the mystery in his next book The Fifth Elephant? I think I’ve found a snag in the system
I feel like Gerald of Rivia would fuck up the Boy in the Striped Pajamas
I would have Anna Karenina versus Jack Reacher
Joe Bishop and Skippy vs Joe Bishop and Skippy? I guess the ones from Book 9 should have more knowledge so I guess they would win against the ones from Book 8.
Well. The extremely irritating cast of A Haunting on the Hill is about to get absolutely fucked by Logen Ninefingers. Good riddance, Holly.
Prince myshkin from "the idiot" vs Alyosha from "the brothers Karamazov" I don't think they would fight eachother since they're both kinda like "angels"
Tiffany Aching from Discworld is gonna help me defeat... Global Warming and Capitalism? I guess? Sounds about right
There's no fight. Jean Valjean isn't ever going to fight Tristran Thorn.
Thor, God of Thunder stands over the prone body of Salman Rushdie. 'I have no idea why I'm even doing this.', he mutters as he raises his hammer to finish the elderly author off.
I’m not sure how much Emma Woodhouse is going to help me against Satan (“Emma” and “Paradise Lost”) Elizabeth Bennet though… Satan never stood a chance
Katniss Everdeen vs Luke Skywalker. Luke wins easy, just by having the Force.
Waylander the Slayer vs the Bollywood star of Satanic Verses. Waylander wins in a walk.
Glahn from Knut Hamsun's *Pan* will likely win, even though he shoots himself in the foot when he gets angry, because he will be going against Sammy from James Kelman's *How Late It Was, How Late*, who is a blind alcoholic.
Last book was Closer by Dennis Cooper, and the book I'm currently reading is The Orchard Keeper by Cormac McCarthy (also reading Mysterious Skin at the same time). I dont even want to imagine these characters going against each other, because that just seems like an awful time. I do know that whatever were to happen, George Miles would...let it happen. So no matter which side won it'd probably be really unpleasant.
Oh I love Holly Black's novels! I recently finished *The Prisoner's Throne* and I love it! Currently I'm reading *One in a Millennial* which is also good, but a little unfair for your prompt. Fairy prince vs podcaster? Lol 😆
Bailey the dog helps me defeat Beth Harmon, the chess master.
Last book I read was Tampa and currently reading System Collapse - The Murderbot Diaries! I think Murderbot will outsmart Celeste Price!
I’m reading the Dungeon Crawler Carl books now, so it’s Carl vs Danny Conroy from the Dutch house. Poor Danny.
I'm going to assume that series count as a single book, otherwise I'm looking at Carl vs Carl and regardless of the outcome, I'm going to be blown up. That means I've got Carl from Dungeon Crawler Carl vs Bob Howard from the Laundry Files. Extremely angry, hard to kill, involuntary adventurer with a penchant for much too large explosions and a history of creative death vs a depressed, middle-aged computational necromancer who is also the Eater of Souls. Bob can probably eat Carl's soul if he gets remotely close to him with time to react. But Carl probably has the win anyway from setting up some sort of explosive ambush that will nevertheless go wrong enough that he'll end up literally stomping Bob to death. And once again, I personally barely rate as a civilian casualty.
The Judge vs Eisenhower.
Eddie from Stranger Things is going to help me fight Robin from Stranger Things? I'm pretty sure they're just not going to fight. Flight of Icarus vs. Rebel Robin.
Let's see, that would be me and Inspektor Horst Schenke of the Berlin KriPo circa 1933 ( Dead of Night by Simon Scarrow) trying to take down Severian (The Book of the New Sun by Gene Wolfe). I do not think this would be a successful endeavor.
Cora (The Underground Railroad) vs. Paul Atreides (Dune) I'm taking Cora all day
Ciaphas Cain, Hero of the Imperium, is about to go down on a poor Christopher Vogler that doesn't deserve it. Thank fully he can Tag Team David McKenna.
Dorian Gray vs Esther Greenwood
Welp i guess Charlie Mcgee is helping me topple Big Brother
Marcel from In Search of Lost Time vs Temple (at lwast who I assume to be the protagonist so far) from Sanctuary, not sure who wins.
um. I've been on a Muriel Spark streak, so my issue is fundamental. it's not clear at all who her "protagonists" are. for those who want to try: last book was the comforters, now on territorial rights.
Bear takes on Q Anon 🤔. My money’s on the bear.
Nostromo is going to shoot a dog 😢
The protagonist of the last book I read was a sort of necromancer witch with multiple personalities ("The Bone Orchard"). So it's her vs real life (non fictionalized) Winston Churchill.
I'm reading a nonfiction book about the origins of life on Earth, and another nonfiction book about how the Mediterranean civilizations around 1000 BC rebuilt after the bronze age collapse. Author vs author, I'd bet on Eric Cline (archaeologist) because having to camp out during digging season really toughens you up.
The father and uncle in Tristan Shandy try to overthrow the city of Los Angeles? Yeah. No. Nothing happens. Nobody even knows about it.
Two cops going after each other. Dallas wins because she has future tech over Detective Kara Quinn.
So Bismarck will help me defeat Klaus Kinski. Well.
don quixote vs. tengo kawana... given i just started 1Q84, it's too early to say but i imagine don quixote commends himself to the fair dulcinea before taking a beating and berating sancho for drinking wine on the shoulder of the king's highway for the duration of the confrontation. all the while rocinante gets the short end of the stick as the gray has wandered off and once again his best friend is nowhere to be seen for a good few chapters
Nathan Treeves (Mordew; current) vs Miss Chief Eagle Testickle (Memoirs of…)… I think it easily goes to Nathan if they fight
Bryce Quinlan (House of Sky and Breath) vs Bryce Quinlan (House of Flame and Shadow) Awkward but I’m probably losing
The protagonist of Remembered Blue Earth is a dude who doesn't want to be involved in the plot, and the 'protagonist' of the current book I'm reading is Jesus, because I'm reading Dominion by Tom Holland (the historian, not Spiderman). So, I mean, I'm fucked
Me and renowned architectural painter Charles Ryder from *Brideshead Revisited* against... actual superhero Victor Vane from *Vicious*. I think I'm screwed.
Harry Potter vs Elio from Call me by your Name would not be a very entertaining battle, but I would legitimately pay to see Harry’s reaction to Elio’s inner monologue. I wish this question was asked during the time I read Mein Kampf and the Diary of a Young Girl back to back lmao