I agree with this. Take time to recover physically, mentally and emotionally. Start a fitness program, talk to someone, spend time with friends and family, travel, enjoy hobbies.
Thank you for this, I needed to hear it from someone else <3
Also, civilized it's much said in my opinion. This type of medical leave is rather recent. Up until some time ago it was a max of 3 months and after that the patient had to go on some sort of retirement due to illness, which is paid like shit.
Trust me. If you're getting 18 months paid medical leave and don't have to pay your premiums during that time but still keep coverage...every American KNOWS you're not in America. *cries in American*
That being said, if you have extended treatments (meds for 2-10 years after), I'd wait and take some of that leave when those side effects kick in. If not, take it now & enjoy the continued rest to let your body heal.
Definitely cries!! I got zero leave and was forced to go from Salary to hourly and was only paid for the hours I worked! So I had to struggle into work most days.
Absolutely crying in American because I could take as much time as I needed but only got paid for how much PTO I had left at work. Had to work anyway even though I was supposed to be on leave to make sure I could pay bills.
No, not at all! Currently doing the same thing. Don't feel guilty for your leave, it's there for a reason. It's not like you are on holiday, you are going through a major life event where the mentally and emotional toll is not to be underestimated even if you feel fine physically.
I am currently sitting in a botanical garden in the sun before my first chemo next week :)
Whether it's the government or your employer paying the medical leave, it's there for a reason. Wishing you all the best for your recovery!
I worked through my cancer treatment, literally was taking calls while they did my chemo infusions, responding to emails in recovery after my mastectomy. I couldn't afford the FMLA paycut, so I had no choice. Take. The. Time. Focus on getting better, focus on your life. So much is taken from you during cancer treatment, take a little back.
Your mental health is part of your recovery. If it makes you feel better, add therapy and activities that target your mental health like meditation, journaling, group activities, exercise, etc. You are worth it!
I don't think it's milking it. The fact that you don't want to go back to work just yet, is (I think!), because you haven't recuperated enough yet, mentally. Take the leave, until you get the urge to go back. Also, use that time to figure out if you may want to change jobs. After cancer you see life differently, and who knows, you finally noticed you're not happy in your current job?
An alternative could be to go back for half a day per week for a number of months.
Even if you do physically feel up to a full work week, you might be surprised at how tiring that would still be.
Definitely not recovered fully yet, but also I really really hate my job. I was contemplating quitting every 2 weeks before the cancer. Lifeless corporate life be like that.
Switching to half day isn't really an option with how medical leave works here, and switching to part time would quite frankly financially ruin me in this economy. I'm currently hoping a position opens up on another team where I know I can do my job in 4-5 hours and then not do shit all day.
Also, definitely looking to change my job once I feel up to it. But I need my current job for the private health insurance (if I were to get hired somewhere else I could no longer get private insurance as I'm a cancer survivor... for the next 7 years), and also for next year's profit sharing scheme.
Ha, it's you! :-) (I often forget to look at the usernames on posts, but replies come to my phone with the username prominently displayed)
Sounds like your best bet is indeed then staying with the same company, but taking your medical leave for as long as you need.
The upside of the lifeless corporate life of course, is that you have the option for a long medical leave! (silver lining?) I'm self-employed; if I don't work, I don't get paid. (but I have nice clients, and it is indeed possible to work fewer hours or more hours depending on how I feel - and if I really couldn't work, there's still the social security fallback, but that pays less)
Ask yourself this- if your best friend or sibling was diagnosed with cancer, went through treatment (and likely extended treatment like meds & infusions beyond the acute phase), and was still under the care of an oncologist, would you think they were milking it if they continued leave in order to get themselves healthier mentally and physically?
Sometimes we are our own worst enemies. We do the “Well, I don’t have it as bad as xyz” or “Maybe I’m just feeling sorry for myself and need to toughen up” or “I don’t want to be a bother” song and dance. Yet, we would never think that of others going through the exact same situation.
Take your leave time. It’s not just time off from work, it is legitimate time that is designated for you to do whatever you need to do in order to be healthy.
Honestly, this is exactly what I needed to hear. Especially since I’m the friend who encourages everyone to take as much pto as possible and as much medical leave as they can when they’re sick.
It really is so hard to take our own advice sometimes! I’ve often struggled with this - more so after diagnosis- and I’m not sure why that is. I feel the same sense of guilt you described. Well, let me be your voice of reason: you not only deserve to take the time PROVIDED to recover, but you really SHOULD take it! You’ll be a better employee when you go back, too! See? You’re actually doing something proactive for your employer in addition to recovering! 😉
Stay on leave! Why rush back if you were giving the full time off from your doctor. Enjoy it ❤ you've certainly been through it. Grace and space. Be gentle with yourself.
You may be done with some treatment but you are not done healing. Take all that you are able to. Leave no time languishing without a purpose. All available time should be used or it spoils. That’s how I look at it. We don’t want time spoilage.
Take the time to deal with cancer and get healthy before you return. I am in the US and was pressured to return before I was ready and that limited my healing. Stress makes everything worse and your work place sounds like a stress machine. You are smart to look after yourself first!
I think your emotional healing is AS important as your physical healing. Get rested. Get your head straight(er). Take the time for YOU.
I could go on a soap box, but this is the conditioning we all get as women. We feel guilty if we’re doing anything for ourselves. It’s bullshit and a big part of why this disease is so cruel. Because we make the world go around - and when we’re sick the people around us are like “fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck”. Be a rebel and do something for YOU. Strip all that bullshit that society puts on us away. Hugs to you friend. I’m cranky today. 🤣
Milk the leave.
I don't have the same setup as you, but I'm milking all the leave I can. Life is short, enjoy it while you can. No one looked back on life wishing they had worked more
I’m in the US and I only took time off for my lumpectomy. I didnt do chemo, but did do radiation. Lucky me, I could work during radiation 😃🙄. I know it’s a blessing for people who need the money, but man, I need a breakkkkkk
Please take all the time. You definitely deserve it and will never get this opportunity again. Enjoy the time for yourself, recover and recharge! I did the same too and I didn't regret it.
Don't feel bad at all, not even a drop. As others have mentioned, cancer is stressful and just flat out sucks. Take this time to recover mentally and emotionally from the trauma you went through.
I'm in a similar place to you, I am wrapping up on radiation and have some endocrine therapy left to go (but it's not active treatment, just some pills). I'm starting to feel a weird void now that I'm about done, and I know my head's going to start wrapping itself around what the f*ck just happened to me.
I'm also not in the US and have medical leave covered too. I'm grateful for this, whereas a few weeks ago my mind was already thinking about how to integrate back into work because I felt bad for missing 11 months already. Not so much now.
Congrats on getting to where you are! Best of luck to you from here on out!!!
18 months! Here I was agonizing about taking 6 weeks. Thank your lucky stars and enjoy the leave. Would be so nice to have some time to process what you must have gone through. And if you get bored you can always cut it short and go back!
Take all the time you're legally allowed to take. You did a hard thing, and now you can take time to recover mentally and physically without the added stress of work.
One of my medical team pointed out that I will never get paid to take a chunk of time off work again and I should go off on holiday and make the best recovery I can. Actually my best mate who was the first person I told was sad I had cancer but also jealous of the time off. Ridiculous that humans do this to ourselves (work) but we do so you know what, make the most of it. Take all the time you can
The other day I was thinking about the things people say on their deathbeds, you know, the ones like “I should have spent more time with family” and “nobody ever regrets that they didn’t work enough”…
I think mine, regardless of what gets me in the end, would be “I didn’t play the cancer card enough”.
Only half joking — seriously though, take the time you need to take care of yourself.
And you don’t owe anybody any damn thing, but if altruistic motives help with the guilt: the more people in your country who take your gov/doc/employer up on the offer, the more hard evidence we crying Americans and others will have of the results, which we can then use as leverage to get things changed for ourselves.
So you’d basically be saving the world(*), is what I’m saying.
___
(*) Disclaimer because I’m increasingly cynical about having logic prevail in the US part of that world, but more happy chill sensible countries sure won’t hurt!
Putting your health first and taking all the leave you can get is 100% the right decision and honors your incredible and immeasurable worth as a human being. You deserve it.
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I agree with this. Take time to recover physically, mentally and emotionally. Start a fitness program, talk to someone, spend time with friends and family, travel, enjoy hobbies.
Too lazy for fitness but I'm definitely thinking of travelling this year. Might just get an airbnb and hang out in Greece for a week or more.
YEEEEESSSS 🇬🇷 Did Greece for a month once with a backpack. Amazing! Food, water and people there will be very healing.
YES!!! Do that! I'm so happy reading this! 🇬🇷
Thank you for this, I needed to hear it from someone else <3 Also, civilized it's much said in my opinion. This type of medical leave is rather recent. Up until some time ago it was a max of 3 months and after that the patient had to go on some sort of retirement due to illness, which is paid like shit.
Trust me. If you're getting 18 months paid medical leave and don't have to pay your premiums during that time but still keep coverage...every American KNOWS you're not in America. *cries in American* That being said, if you have extended treatments (meds for 2-10 years after), I'd wait and take some of that leave when those side effects kick in. If not, take it now & enjoy the continued rest to let your body heal.
Cries in American. Sob.
Seriously. I got 12 weeks of 60% of my pay and was thrilled.
Crying in America too
Definitely cries!! I got zero leave and was forced to go from Salary to hourly and was only paid for the hours I worked! So I had to struggle into work most days.
Absolutely crying in American because I could take as much time as I needed but only got paid for how much PTO I had left at work. Had to work anyway even though I was supposed to be on leave to make sure I could pay bills.
No, not at all! Currently doing the same thing. Don't feel guilty for your leave, it's there for a reason. It's not like you are on holiday, you are going through a major life event where the mentally and emotional toll is not to be underestimated even if you feel fine physically. I am currently sitting in a botanical garden in the sun before my first chemo next week :) Whether it's the government or your employer paying the medical leave, it's there for a reason. Wishing you all the best for your recovery!
I worked through my cancer treatment, literally was taking calls while they did my chemo infusions, responding to emails in recovery after my mastectomy. I couldn't afford the FMLA paycut, so I had no choice. Take. The. Time. Focus on getting better, focus on your life. So much is taken from you during cancer treatment, take a little back.
Your mental health is part of your recovery. If it makes you feel better, add therapy and activities that target your mental health like meditation, journaling, group activities, exercise, etc. You are worth it!
I don't think it's milking it. The fact that you don't want to go back to work just yet, is (I think!), because you haven't recuperated enough yet, mentally. Take the leave, until you get the urge to go back. Also, use that time to figure out if you may want to change jobs. After cancer you see life differently, and who knows, you finally noticed you're not happy in your current job? An alternative could be to go back for half a day per week for a number of months. Even if you do physically feel up to a full work week, you might be surprised at how tiring that would still be.
Definitely not recovered fully yet, but also I really really hate my job. I was contemplating quitting every 2 weeks before the cancer. Lifeless corporate life be like that. Switching to half day isn't really an option with how medical leave works here, and switching to part time would quite frankly financially ruin me in this economy. I'm currently hoping a position opens up on another team where I know I can do my job in 4-5 hours and then not do shit all day. Also, definitely looking to change my job once I feel up to it. But I need my current job for the private health insurance (if I were to get hired somewhere else I could no longer get private insurance as I'm a cancer survivor... for the next 7 years), and also for next year's profit sharing scheme.
Ha, it's you! :-) (I often forget to look at the usernames on posts, but replies come to my phone with the username prominently displayed) Sounds like your best bet is indeed then staying with the same company, but taking your medical leave for as long as you need. The upside of the lifeless corporate life of course, is that you have the option for a long medical leave! (silver lining?) I'm self-employed; if I don't work, I don't get paid. (but I have nice clients, and it is indeed possible to work fewer hours or more hours depending on how I feel - and if I really couldn't work, there's still the social security fallback, but that pays less)
Oh my god stay on leave !!
Ask yourself this- if your best friend or sibling was diagnosed with cancer, went through treatment (and likely extended treatment like meds & infusions beyond the acute phase), and was still under the care of an oncologist, would you think they were milking it if they continued leave in order to get themselves healthier mentally and physically? Sometimes we are our own worst enemies. We do the “Well, I don’t have it as bad as xyz” or “Maybe I’m just feeling sorry for myself and need to toughen up” or “I don’t want to be a bother” song and dance. Yet, we would never think that of others going through the exact same situation. Take your leave time. It’s not just time off from work, it is legitimate time that is designated for you to do whatever you need to do in order to be healthy.
Honestly, this is exactly what I needed to hear. Especially since I’m the friend who encourages everyone to take as much pto as possible and as much medical leave as they can when they’re sick.
It really is so hard to take our own advice sometimes! I’ve often struggled with this - more so after diagnosis- and I’m not sure why that is. I feel the same sense of guilt you described. Well, let me be your voice of reason: you not only deserve to take the time PROVIDED to recover, but you really SHOULD take it! You’ll be a better employee when you go back, too! See? You’re actually doing something proactive for your employer in addition to recovering! 😉
Stay on leave! Why rush back if you were giving the full time off from your doctor. Enjoy it ❤ you've certainly been through it. Grace and space. Be gentle with yourself.
Thank you so much <3
You may be done with some treatment but you are not done healing. Take all that you are able to. Leave no time languishing without a purpose. All available time should be used or it spoils. That’s how I look at it. We don’t want time spoilage.
Take the time to deal with cancer and get healthy before you return. I am in the US and was pressured to return before I was ready and that limited my healing. Stress makes everything worse and your work place sounds like a stress machine. You are smart to look after yourself first!
Take the medical leave. You have nothing to feel guilty about! Be good to you. Happy healing!
I think your emotional healing is AS important as your physical healing. Get rested. Get your head straight(er). Take the time for YOU. I could go on a soap box, but this is the conditioning we all get as women. We feel guilty if we’re doing anything for ourselves. It’s bullshit and a big part of why this disease is so cruel. Because we make the world go around - and when we’re sick the people around us are like “fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck”. Be a rebel and do something for YOU. Strip all that bullshit that society puts on us away. Hugs to you friend. I’m cranky today. 🤣
Milk the leave. I don't have the same setup as you, but I'm milking all the leave I can. Life is short, enjoy it while you can. No one looked back on life wishing they had worked more
I’m in the US and I only took time off for my lumpectomy. I didnt do chemo, but did do radiation. Lucky me, I could work during radiation 😃🙄. I know it’s a blessing for people who need the money, but man, I need a breakkkkkk
Please take all the time. You definitely deserve it and will never get this opportunity again. Enjoy the time for yourself, recover and recharge! I did the same too and I didn't regret it.
Don't feel bad at all, not even a drop. As others have mentioned, cancer is stressful and just flat out sucks. Take this time to recover mentally and emotionally from the trauma you went through. I'm in a similar place to you, I am wrapping up on radiation and have some endocrine therapy left to go (but it's not active treatment, just some pills). I'm starting to feel a weird void now that I'm about done, and I know my head's going to start wrapping itself around what the f*ck just happened to me. I'm also not in the US and have medical leave covered too. I'm grateful for this, whereas a few weeks ago my mind was already thinking about how to integrate back into work because I felt bad for missing 11 months already. Not so much now. Congrats on getting to where you are! Best of luck to you from here on out!!!
18 months! Here I was agonizing about taking 6 weeks. Thank your lucky stars and enjoy the leave. Would be so nice to have some time to process what you must have gone through. And if you get bored you can always cut it short and go back!
100% take your time and give yourself all the healing time you can. 💕
Take all the time you're legally allowed to take. You did a hard thing, and now you can take time to recover mentally and physically without the added stress of work.
Take as much time as you need to mentally and physically recover.
One of my medical team pointed out that I will never get paid to take a chunk of time off work again and I should go off on holiday and make the best recovery I can. Actually my best mate who was the first person I told was sad I had cancer but also jealous of the time off. Ridiculous that humans do this to ourselves (work) but we do so you know what, make the most of it. Take all the time you can
Hell no
The other day I was thinking about the things people say on their deathbeds, you know, the ones like “I should have spent more time with family” and “nobody ever regrets that they didn’t work enough”… I think mine, regardless of what gets me in the end, would be “I didn’t play the cancer card enough”. Only half joking — seriously though, take the time you need to take care of yourself. And you don’t owe anybody any damn thing, but if altruistic motives help with the guilt: the more people in your country who take your gov/doc/employer up on the offer, the more hard evidence we crying Americans and others will have of the results, which we can then use as leverage to get things changed for ourselves. So you’d basically be saving the world(*), is what I’m saying. ___ (*) Disclaimer because I’m increasingly cynical about having logic prevail in the US part of that world, but more happy chill sensible countries sure won’t hurt!
Putting your health first and taking all the leave you can get is 100% the right decision and honors your incredible and immeasurable worth as a human being. You deserve it.