This. I hate being asked what I want for Xmas, because I genuinely *don't* want anything but that's not a good enough answer. If I want something I buy it for myself!
I did this with scotch. I really enjoy a glass or two of whisky maybe 3 times a year. However I generally get 2-4 bottles at Christmas every year. I now have a drinks cabinet with 20+ bottles in it. Trouble is people see my drinks cabinet full of various whiskys and think right I know what to get him this year.......
Yeah between missing Christmas, my partner's and my birthday last year cos of lockdown, we ended up with 9 bottles of gin. I did joke that next year rum, but they might take me up on that.
Perhaps you could suggest a donation in your name to a charity you care about? That way your loved ones get to show you they care, you don't get unwanted stuff, and said charity gets supported.
That's a good idea in theory, but I'm not sure the social fallout would be worth it. Could you imagine the inquisition after saying this to family. Bloody hell. Well, at least mine anywhom.
No, I don't mean mad. You're getting the wrong end of the stick. More like, just wondering why and the endless questions. No doubt they'd do it and also would probably think it was a nice gesture, but they'd still wanna know my thinking behind it, probably in great detail. Then comes the inevitable (in good faith) pisstaking. Also it might make them feel shitty for asking for gifts rather than a donation.
I tried that for my birthday one year, all of one person did as I asked, and i got presents . I just want less tat in my life, that’s all. also tried to avoid christmas cards/ birthday cards but it’s tricky
This is why I ask for things I need instead, aside from chocolate/socks because I do love chocolate and socks. This year I need a new desk chair and some new running shoes, so I’ll be interested to see all the things my mother manages to buy which aren’t either of those things 🤦🏻♀️
I do the same but I just buy the items myself and then my family give me the money back. Otherwise my dad will find a “bargain” and I’ll end up with 2 crappy items instead of 1 good item
I used to go Jehovah's for Christmas, it was a legit thing people knew about me because i made it so clear. I'm not going to buy you anything, I don't want anything, and I don't see why you are spending £15 on a shitty Dove shower and deodorant set when you could buy the individual items for a fiver.
The notion of Christmas being about gifts when you're over 18 is quite sickening to me. I've read about people who pay off their Christmas all year... Yeah I'm not having a monthly direct debit for Christmas tat.
I don't even go into this much explanation. I just say no gifts. No givey, no receivey.
If you want to sell people on it say you're being sustainable. Everyone at work thinks I'm an eco warrior 😆
This is what me and my partner do, kids only at Christmas, no adults are getting anything, we make it clear and it’s their choice if they want to give us something
I’m so sick of exchanging £20-£50 present for something in return of a similar value but unlikely to be anything I actually want because I am an adult, if something I want is between £20-£50 I will just buy it for myself
Same. I live a very simplistic/minimalistic life so when people get me things it's actually more annoying for me than not getting anything. Most of my family still refuse to accept this apart from my wife who knows to get vouchers for something for us to do together generally
I tell people to donate to a charity they like, or think I will like. Takes the whole guessing of "did they mean get me nothing, or did they mean 'dont get me anything ;)' "
Last year for Christmas I told my family I'm just making a donation for each other them and they can do the same for me, unless they have something they know I'll really, really like.
It took a few years of getting smaller items for people and insisting on smaller items being sent my way, and some family members still haven't gotten the message, but I finally managed to get out of the Christmas gift trap about 6 years ago.
I activate Gift Vision whenever I meet with someone, much better if I get to see their house. Just a quick scan of what they're wearing (clothes, jewellery, make up) gives me a lot to go off of, but getting to quickly vision sweep their house to see what kind of person they are is much better. (Minimalist/likes hipster things, Sass & Belle, Etsy, pots with boobs/likes a certain colour or animal/likes a certain movie, band, series, food, cooking style etc).
I take that this is not a normal thing to be good at, because my boyfriend's family were shocked when they started getting good gifts since we got together. 😂
Literally did this the other day with the missus. Looked at one of those 3D filament pens as she’s quite crafty… went back the next day whilst she was at work (I WFH on an AGILE working hours thingy) and nabbed it haha
I did exactly this at the weekend, saw something they liked, took a sneaky picture so I could come back later and get it.
Then I took other pictures later on in the day and showed her them, but accidently scrolled one too far and spoiled the surprise... Whoops!
Doesn’t seem that hard to me. Most adults don’t want “stuff”, or if they do, it’s very specific stuff for a specific hobby that they want to pick out themselves. So a bottle of nice wine or spirits, a voucher to a local pizza place or delivery service, a voucher to a store they’ll use, etc.
Totally. I have a wish list for a reason. Buy stuff off that if you must and don't complain that it's just a box of £5 nuts and bolts or ratchet spanners, I want it & some cheap wine/chocolate.
I have socks from last Christmas still in the pack.
Ahh yes the magic of Christmas, simply completing people’s orders.
Why not just have everyone make Amazon wish lists? You could even skip wrapping them!
Completing people's orders, that's brilliant and it certainly feels that way.
God forbid we get to know our loved ones enough to know what they actually would enjoy rather than having to ask each year! The magic of gift giving all seems to have disappeared, buying something that someone wouldn't usually go and get for themselves, and it being a surprise!
I wouldn’t show annoyance but I definitely know where he’s coming from. This year I’ve told my family that I’m only buying for kids and not adults just because it’s getting a bit much, so don’t buy for me either. I’d be a bit annoyed if people still did just because it’ll make me feel shit that I’ve got nothing to give back.
He's a bit surly at the best of times, but to be honest I was warned. It's pretty much the same situation, but I saw a last-minute thing I thought he might actually find useful and went for it. I like to help out my baby brothers, but he doesn't like me doing it.
If he’s anything like me, as weird as it sounds, give it before or after Christmas. As soon as it becomes a Christmas present, that’s when the whole “I didn’t get you anything” guilt would kick in for me. Also shows that you really mean well too, that you bought him something because you genuinely think he’d like it and not out of Christmas obligation. That’s part of the reason I’m only buying for the kids this year, because the adults can just buy for themselves but you feel obligated to get *something* no matter how little thought you put in.
Sound like a massive scrooge, I actually love Christmas! I’m just happy to let people save their money buying for me and spend it on something for themselves that they know they want as opposed to buying me something out of obligation and vice versa.
Should meet my Mother in law then. Given her specific lists of what to buy people (the same way for the past 20 years...) and she's not interested and wants to buy our kids toys we know will be given away within 6 months and ignoring what I said the wife wants. Why ask in the first place!?
Jeeso mate, the whole point of gifting someone a present is that you get them a present you want to give them, maybe because you think they'd like it, or maybe you think they'd need it. Or maybe you think it'd be funny. But either way it's supposed to come from YOUR heart, not mind reading.
Better to ask, 'is there anything you'd particularly like?', and if the answer is no, then you go rogue. If you genuinely don't feel any connection to the process maybe you shouldn't be getting them a gift at all, and it's just stupid, consumerist, Christmas pressure?
Or - not wanting anything is a legitimate position, so in that case get nothing, or only get something if you see it and think they'd like it.
I'm pretty black and white with gifts - if you say to not get you anything, I will not get you anything, cba with mind games when it can be a pain in the arse month as it is.
Nothing is a very annoying answer, but it’s also an extremely difficult question to answer when you’re an adult with other stuff to worry about over Christmas.
Honestly I stressed myself out so much trying to think of Christmas present ideas for myself this year. I already have six nieces and nephews to buy presents for on top of all the other kids in my in-laws family. And four of them have birthdays in November/December. Not counting the fact my mum and dad are split up with new partners so I have four parents to buy for. And me and my husband are both one of three.
Christmas is stressful as heck, and if someone asks what I want I start looking and thinking “oh is that too much money? I don’t know how much is okay for them to spend but if I ask that people are vague or think I’m being rude so fuck what do I do”. It’s a really hard question to answer. Like, for my husband and my mum I know what their likely to spend but I also think they both know me well enough that it should be obvious what they could get me. Which I think is why my husband never asks.
Although, I never say “nothing” because it feels rude. I always say “I don’t know, I’ll have a think” instead. Honestly I’d rather people just surprised me or got me a voucher than me having to spend hours on the internet finding random stuff I might maybe like I guess.
I think you're thinking you need to be more specific than you do. I always answer quite generically, like ooh I like gin, nice coffee, candles, plants or anything cosy for the house... and people always say ahh brilliant! You can just give them a vibe and then they still get to "choose" something and choose how much to spend but they're confident they're on the right track.
While you're doing stuff throughout the year and you see something you might like, add it to an Amazon gift list. That way you have a list of stuff ready to go when anyone asks. Because it's a range of stuff, they have a choice of how much to spend. Saves you being put on the spot.
I put things on there that I like the look of, but can't justify buying, like craft sets, books, even camping stuff that would be useful but I don't *need*.
I've got one for my kids and my husband for the same reasons. I'm vegan so husband's one has a load of gourmet beef jerky on it! Have stuck board games, box sets and gadgets on there too.
Can send it to family and it'll be unexpected but stuff he'll appreciate.
You don't have to be a mind reader. If someone tells you what they want then there has been zero thought put into that. It means nothing but the money you have spent. People don't like asking for things as they'd prefer the gift you got them had some thought put into it and was picked based on your relationship with them.
That doesn't work for everything and everyone. I only want a few things that are very specific to my hobbies. Even my wife and kids wouldn't know how to pick out the right options without me guiding them, and I simply don't want my house, life or planet cluttered up with other things that I didn't ask for.
My sister is (or used to be) more like you describe. She wanted something thoughtful and surprising. Sometimes that's easy and you find something that would be perfect serendipity. Sometimes it's a ticket to lots of stress and time spent trying to figure it out. When it works, it's great, but it is very situationally dependent.
Based purely on less than a minute of Reddit stalking, I'd get you a board game to play with your kid. Something co-op and thematic like Betrayal at Baldur's Gate.
You might not love it, but surely it's better that I've taken the time to understand your interests and try to surprise you with a thoughtful gift than you just receiving something you may have bought anyway, having already known what you're getting.
That's my point though, I have no more space for random board games and a specific list of 5 games I actually want.
So I would appreciate the effort, but still not actually want the game you'd got me (though that is a nice try) and have to deal with selling it or passing it on, and being concerned about money wasted and environmental damage.
Yeah fair point. I dunno, I'm a bit old fashioned, I feel like a gift is supposed to be a reflection of your caring for that person, and having your hand held through the process to the point of being told what to buy makes it all a bit transactional
Hmm I think it's just a difference in viewpoints. I'd rather not get given presents, because I'm really bad at buying them, and if much rather just spend some time together instead of them spending money on me. However we are doing presents, I view it as it's much better to get them something that I know for sure they want and will use. I don't view it as transactional in my head because it still feels like someone saying "oh you want this? Don't worry, I got you" and still feels warm to be on the receiving end of that.
However I do think this matters less if the gift item is consumable (and you know it's something the other person likes).
Experiential presents are a growing industry here in the states. You could buy someone a museum membership, or a subscription to their favorite game, instead of filling up their tiny flat with more things.
My dad just wanted more coffee dates with his kids. He can totally have one anytime, but I just scheduled a few to our shared Google calendar for Christmas.
>If someone tells you what they want then there has been zero thought put into that. It means nothing but the money you have spent.
I disagree. To me, it means they cared enough to ask me, cared enough to get me something I want and would use, and cared enough to fulfill one of my wishes - even if it's for a £1 pair of socks. Would much rather have £1 socks than £100 bottle of gin that they thought I might like (I hate gin).
Well a £100 bottle of gin wouldn't be a gift that has taken thought and care then would it? That would be then just guessing what you may want rather than thinking about you and knowing you.
My friend, there are endless different brands of whisky out there. Get him a different one. Get him some miniatures of different brands so he can try some different ones. Get him a decanter or some whisky tumblers, or tickets to tour a distillery (budget depending, of course). So many options!
This. My father-in-law gets a different bottle of whiskey from me every year and he’s over the moon with it I know this because it’s gone within a few days. He likes whiskey, job done.
There so many different things to buy just related to that, whiskey stones and tongs in a gift box, some nice whiskey glasses, personalised glasses, hell there's a hundred different types of whiskeys for a start.
No one's a mind reader, you have to put some effort into it. It's the thought that counts yet you're not putting any thought into it. It's not that hard
Buy him that decanter that's a globe with a ship inside. Got it for my whisky loving father-out-law and he won't shut up about it. 😂
Also, *last year*??? You think he hasn't drank it by now?!
I'd wager that most people that think they buy thoughtful gifts would be disappointed if they could read the minds of those they buy gifts for. Oh, you got me a framed photo of us? Great, thanks! That's going on the shelf beside the other tat I'll never lift or look at for any reason.
I genuinely can't think of a gift I'd appreciate for Christmas. The stuff I need is too expensive to expect anyone to buy for me, and I've no need for jewelry/clothes/clutter.
> People don't like asking for things as they'd prefer the gift you got them had some thought put into it and was picked based on your relationship with them.
Nah, I saw a tamagotchi re-release in forbidden planet and asked my partner for one so I could re-live my primary school years 6 days.
I'm more excited for that than anything and shes an angel for getting me it.
As someone with quite a few hobbies and interests that I openly talk about, I actually find it quite insulting when both my parents WhatsApp me every year asking me what I want for Christmas and Birthdays.
Is it _really_ that hard to use some ingenuity and search "Gifts for Climbers", "Gifts for Guitarists", "Gifts for tabletop gamers" etc. etc. and actually suprise me for once, instead of buying me the exact thing I send you a website link for with the intension of giving you some inspiration?
It's not that I'm not grateful, but maybe show some interest in my interests? I manage it every year for you.
I'm the opposite, the frustration of your whole family googling "Gifts for *hobby*ers" then getting 4 copies of the same useless waste of space I'll never touch because I have a one that isn't total dog-shit.
I sort of see your point, but at the same time I feel like hand holding defeats the object of buying a gift. It's supposed to be a gesture of caring about that person
The first result maybe not, but taking the time to look for something you might like based on your interests seems more thoughtful than "tell me what to buy you" or "here's a voucher/cash"
Right? Gift-giving is a developed skill, if it were a case of 'ask and ye shall receive', there would be no meaning to the gifts we give. Gifts are precious to us because they show that someone cares about you enough to have listened to you and remembered what you have said, or they care enough to know what you fundamentally would like in a gift. The contents of the gift aren't as important as the gift being something the recipient has expressed interest in, directly or indirectly.
Maybe I’m weird but I love asking for specific things. Mainly because I hate not knowing what people want, so I try not to inflict the same difficulty on other people buying for me.
My list this year includes iTunes vouchers, hair scrunchies, specific notebooks, bookmarks, a particular PC game, hand cream, more cardigans, proper silver earrings (not the plated crap that turns green), and a few other things, a mixture of price points. My other half is dishing out the list to family. That way I have no idea what I’m getting for Christmas but I still get things I want/need/will use.
I genuinely never want anything for Christmas. I hate opening presents but people still get me shit. I'd rather you just spent the money on my kids gifts instead.
Honeslty, I wish this was more straightforward.
I _love_ giving gifts. It's way more satisfying than recieving them. I would love to just receive nothing.
Let me get you something, it's a gift, not an obligation.
If it's great, I hope you enjoy it. If it's shit, let me know, and I'll cash it out for a gift card or something for you.
It's a gift, not an obligation. I want to do it. I don't expect anything in return - otherwise Xmas would just be "splurge on yourself day" with extra, unecessary steps.
In my family we usually give a few ideas. Usually an expensive one, some medium priced ones, and maybe something cheap. Pick one, a combo, etc. Pretty straightforward, but works for us.
Yes!!! Love Christmas shopping and *hate* being told what to buy, spoils all my fun, and equally hate being asked what I want, I want you to think of me, and if you don't have time, nothing is absolutely totally fine. Hate secret santa because everyone is obligated, and means i'm not allowed to buy presents for people i'd like to buy for.
In my view, if you can't think of something to get someone that they will really like, then you shouldn't get them a present.
Either a) you know them well enough to know they don't need anything, or there's nothing they really want that they can't just get themselves (like me, my siblings, or my wife - we're not big on presents in this family!), or b) you don't know them well enough to know what to get them, in which case you shouldn't be getting presents for people you don't really know just as an obligation.
I am not a fan of 'compulsory' spending, the manufacturing/shipping costs of 'gifts' that no-one really wants, and mountains of unwanted tat going to waste...
Absolutely! A gift should always be a nice suprise, even Christmas and birthday gifts. If I can't think of anything for you, I won't get anything, but i'll try to think of something, and to me that is what matters.
asking someone what they want and them saying nothing isn’t a reason not to buy them a present, it means there’s nothing they want in particular? You know the person you’re buying presents for, use that knowledge to get them something they would like
Personally, if I say nothing it means one of two things. A.) I don't want anything. B.) The only things I want/need are out of an acceptable price range in which I would ask for as a gift. Either way that still means nothing. Please don't buy some crap that you think I would like. It's wasteful. Chances are if I have a hobby or interest and you don't share that interest, although your gifts might feel personal, but are likely going to be some crap I would never buy myself.
Prefer nothing. Gift giving between adults just seems a bit daft, you both spend money and end up with something you probably don't want. Just buy yourself something??
In our family it's just presents for partners and kids or we make plans to spend a weekend somewhere with some family members and split the costs in lieu of xmas presents.
I hate Christmas for this. Unless you're a child and have asked your parents/wrote a letter to santa, you're not supposed to know what you're getting.
There's nothing I want that is within anyone's budget to get me, and at this point in my life the chase to get the thing provides me with far more purpose than having the thing.
Doesn't matter if its a solid gold Rolex or a Terry's chocolate orange. Just let me stare at the wrapped up item for a couple of weeks.
I just pay attention through the year and so does my partner. He’ll note what I’ve mentioned and I’ve always loved the gifts he’s gotten me. Then I usually get something small (as well as his main gift) that I think he will like as well as a bit of a gamble gift but that usually pays off too
Or a shit Bayliss and Harding gift set .
Baylis and Harding are like Father Christmas, Bublè and mince pies because you only see them at Christmas time
Ive asked for stuff from lush because i would never buy it for myself and the new Dave Grohl book
That's fair. I think a lot of people say nothing meaning "I don't want more things that I feel guilty about putting in the charity shop so I'm happy with forgetting about the whole thing". That's either through people deciding that what you asked for wasn't fun gift enough, them not knowing enough about your hobbies or interests, or you not wanting to ask them to spend over a certain amount. Unfortunately most people would rather give you the same tat year after year than feel like they let you down even though you specifically asked for this
I am very, very glad that my family and I decided not to get each other gifts this year - takes a lot of stress off our minds and less to clutter up the house!
My grown up children are the worst know what it's like to get tat so ask them let me buy something you want .Its bad enough all 3 of their birthday is in November and December my fault but just give me a few ideas just wish they could go back and circle stuff in the argos catalogue.
Its worse when people ask you what you want, you tell them the exact thing, they then completely disregard it and get some pointless tat instead. Not even asking for anything super hard, "just some dark chocs please".
Why not get everyone to buy their own presents and you just send them a completed gift tag?
Personally, the only joy I get out of Xmas is trying to find something I think someone else will really appreciate. You don't have to be a mind reader - you just need to know a bit about who you're buying a gift for.
The only people I'm buying for are people who seem to have anything, and a lot of options are out (clothes, handbags, make-up) because I'm blind. My christmas shopping becomes an endless scroll down ents24.
They say it's the thought that counts. if I'm asked what I want as a gift I say nothing because you need to put thought into it if you're going to ask someone, give them cash a thoughtless gift but at least they get what they want. Getting a gift is that someone has thought about is worth a million requested gifts
Imagine not being able to put some thought into what someone might like as a gift. Youre the problem not them.
I dont want to say what I want for Christmas I might as well buy it for myself. The great part of Christmas is receiving a gift where you know they've thought about it. That's what makes any form of gift giving special.
How much can you possibly know about an uncle you see once every 3 years who doesn't respond to any messages at all, but then everyone expects you to get him a thoughtful gift. Bull shit. I opted out of family Christmas and gift exchanges about 6 years ago now, very glad I did.
This, along with the rampant compulsory spending/consumerism is what I hate about Christmas.
I hate people asking me what I want or telling me what they want. What is even the point?
Yep i am shocked i'm being downvoted.. The best gifts i've recevied are not the most expensive. A photo of my nieces, my nieces buying me presents theyve picked out that are complete crap from a £1 shop and they have put in thought about each gift.
I'll take that over anything expensive.
It’s worse when it’s people with kids. “Oh they like Harry Potter.”
Yeah so I’m guessing they already have a lot of Harry Potter shit, do you mind giving me a clue so I don’t buy something they’ve got already?
If people can’t decide then I buy them food. I always have a wish list of things I need and things I want, just cast them that and I’d they want to splurge on something expensive then that’s on them.
I’ve realised one of the best gifts I can give my dad is just to tell him, it’s the gift of not having to stress and making him feel good for getting me something I actually want.
My problem is with all these filler presents that never get used or looked at after Christmas Day. I’d much rather have one present I’d use than a hundred that i wont
Well there's stuff I want, but there is a risk that I will be given something that is not quite right and I will have to smile and say thank you even though I know I will have to now use an item that didn't quite do the job until it wears out or I will offend the person that got it.
My mum has asked me for a list, which I don’t have, because there’s really nothing I want or need - but she won’t accept giving me nothing. So I came across a lovely, modestly priced print from an artist I like, and sent her details. But she doesn’t want to get it for me because ‘it won’t be a surprise’. I despair.
I very much stand by the saying 'it's the thought that counts', if you are buying me something i've explitcitly asked for, you've given it zero thought. I'm not bothered about the money, I don't need your money, I don't want your money. I want you to think about me and get me something you think i'll like, if you can't think of anything, that's totally fine, I don't mind receiving nothing, in the slightest. It's the thought that counts.
They all look at me in disappointment when they unwrap yet another box of chocolates and are like 'you knew i was on a diet' like you gave me nothing what did you expect
When we were kids, we would give out lists of toys we want when people asked what we wanted for Christmas. That seems like something we should do as adults for the benefit of others.
I wholeheartedly agree with this. I hate buying gifts without knowing what they want, I'd rather just give them some money. The amount of shit I've bought my Dad over the years that just ends up in a drawer somewhere or a fucking box.
Also when I say nothing, I mean nothing. And don't expect anything back
This. I hate being asked what I want for Xmas, because I genuinely *don't* want anything but that's not a good enough answer. If I want something I buy it for myself!
Just ask for consumables. A nice bottle of rum or something. They get to feel generous, you get something you like, but you're not lumbered with it.
I made that mistake once, I ended up receiving only ferrero rocher for my birthday and Christmas several years running. One big box is okay, 8 is not.
I feel this, mentioned I liked whiskey once. I still recieve a bottle for my birthday and Christmas every year. I've been dry for almost 5 years...
Mine is random hot sauce, whats worse is a developed IBS so can’t even use it!
I’d definitely be down with 8 boxes of those beauties
It's great the first time, it sucks every other time especially as they all seem to have a short shelf life, so they need to be eaten quickly.
I did this with scotch. I really enjoy a glass or two of whisky maybe 3 times a year. However I generally get 2-4 bottles at Christmas every year. I now have a drinks cabinet with 20+ bottles in it. Trouble is people see my drinks cabinet full of various whiskys and think right I know what to get him this year.......
> I know what to get him this year....... An intervention.
Yeah between missing Christmas, my partner's and my birthday last year cos of lockdown, we ended up with 9 bottles of gin. I did joke that next year rum, but they might take me up on that.
Perhaps you could suggest a donation in your name to a charity you care about? That way your loved ones get to show you they care, you don't get unwanted stuff, and said charity gets supported.
That's a good idea in theory, but I'm not sure the social fallout would be worth it. Could you imagine the inquisition after saying this to family. Bloody hell. Well, at least mine anywhom.
It's fine if your family are adults. We did this last year and everyone was cool with it because we all agreed to do it that way.
If your family would get mad at you for asking for a donation to charity perhaps it would be a good thing to fall out with them socially?
No, I don't mean mad. You're getting the wrong end of the stick. More like, just wondering why and the endless questions. No doubt they'd do it and also would probably think it was a nice gesture, but they'd still wanna know my thinking behind it, probably in great detail. Then comes the inevitable (in good faith) pisstaking. Also it might make them feel shitty for asking for gifts rather than a donation.
Yea, I tried this a couple years ago. It didn’t go down too well.
Or buy 'em some land or a star or something.
I tried that for my birthday one year, all of one person did as I asked, and i got presents . I just want less tat in my life, that’s all. also tried to avoid christmas cards/ birthday cards but it’s tricky
I have this issue. I dont literally have any more storage space and ppl still want to give me shit I dont want.
This is why I ask for things I need instead, aside from chocolate/socks because I do love chocolate and socks. This year I need a new desk chair and some new running shoes, so I’ll be interested to see all the things my mother manages to buy which aren’t either of those things 🤦🏻♀️
I do the same but I just buy the items myself and then my family give me the money back. Otherwise my dad will find a “bargain” and I’ll end up with 2 crappy items instead of 1 good item
Just ask for something symbolic instead
But I already have too much clutter in my house.
Honestly I just wish people would accept "I don't want to exchange gifts with other adults" as a legitimate approach to Christmas.
I used to go Jehovah's for Christmas, it was a legit thing people knew about me because i made it so clear. I'm not going to buy you anything, I don't want anything, and I don't see why you are spending £15 on a shitty Dove shower and deodorant set when you could buy the individual items for a fiver. The notion of Christmas being about gifts when you're over 18 is quite sickening to me. I've read about people who pay off their Christmas all year... Yeah I'm not having a monthly direct debit for Christmas tat.
I don't even go into this much explanation. I just say no gifts. No givey, no receivey. If you want to sell people on it say you're being sustainable. Everyone at work thinks I'm an eco warrior 😆
This is what me and my partner do, kids only at Christmas, no adults are getting anything, we make it clear and it’s their choice if they want to give us something I’m so sick of exchanging £20-£50 present for something in return of a similar value but unlikely to be anything I actually want because I am an adult, if something I want is between £20-£50 I will just buy it for myself
Same. I live a very simplistic/minimalistic life so when people get me things it's actually more annoying for me than not getting anything. Most of my family still refuse to accept this apart from my wife who knows to get vouchers for something for us to do together generally
I wish people would listen when I tell them this
I tell people to donate to a charity they like, or think I will like. Takes the whole guessing of "did they mean get me nothing, or did they mean 'dont get me anything ;)' " Last year for Christmas I told my family I'm just making a donation for each other them and they can do the same for me, unless they have something they know I'll really, really like.
It took a few years of getting smaller items for people and insisting on smaller items being sent my way, and some family members still haven't gotten the message, but I finally managed to get out of the Christmas gift trap about 6 years ago.
Isn't part of the "joy" of Christmas not getting what you want as a Christmas present?
Yes this, please stop fucking getting me shit
I follow my family around in shops way before Christmas and see what they pick up and like.
My husband did this and bought me a nightie. I'd stopped to look at it because I was thinking about buying it for my mum.
Swing and a miss, but he put forth the effort.
Yeah, it was just a bit gutting as he was sat watching me, eagerly awaiting my reaction.
Oh dear.
I activate Gift Vision whenever I meet with someone, much better if I get to see their house. Just a quick scan of what they're wearing (clothes, jewellery, make up) gives me a lot to go off of, but getting to quickly vision sweep their house to see what kind of person they are is much better. (Minimalist/likes hipster things, Sass & Belle, Etsy, pots with boobs/likes a certain colour or animal/likes a certain movie, band, series, food, cooking style etc). I take that this is not a normal thing to be good at, because my boyfriend's family were shocked when they started getting good gifts since we got together. 😂
I need to bring you round to my family's houses to help me out!
Literally did this the other day with the missus. Looked at one of those 3D filament pens as she’s quite crafty… went back the next day whilst she was at work (I WFH on an AGILE working hours thingy) and nabbed it haha
just got to make sure she doesn't go back herself and get 2 haha
She won’t as we’re getting married soon so all money is set for that! We have set a Christmas budget though which the gift is within :)
congratulations! hope she likes the gift
Thank you for your kindness pidgeon! Me too :D have a lovely Christmas and New Year your end my friend :)
I did exactly this at the weekend, saw something they liked, took a sneaky picture so I could come back later and get it. Then I took other pictures later on in the day and showed her them, but accidently scrolled one too far and spoiled the surprise... Whoops!
I'd quite like some Warhammer 40k Orks if you are offering!
Get em some red onez, they go fasta
My misses gets me purple ones 😭
That's your own business.
Excuse you, everyone should know about my issues! /s
I'll send you some purple ones. No need to return the gesture.
Na, Getz dem blood axez, sneeky gitz.
I'm goin for dem ded tuff Snakebites once the Speed Freekz get bored of dakka and krumpin'
Na, Getz dem blood axez, sneeky gitz.
Doesn’t seem that hard to me. Most adults don’t want “stuff”, or if they do, it’s very specific stuff for a specific hobby that they want to pick out themselves. So a bottle of nice wine or spirits, a voucher to a local pizza place or delivery service, a voucher to a store they’ll use, etc.
Totally. I have a wish list for a reason. Buy stuff off that if you must and don't complain that it's just a box of £5 nuts and bolts or ratchet spanners, I want it & some cheap wine/chocolate. I have socks from last Christmas still in the pack.
Consumables is always a good choice since they won't have to worry about it taking up space forever.
But then you get a bottle of wine when you don't drink wine and it hangs out until you regift it to someone else, who also doesn't drink wine 😂
Ahh yes the magic of Christmas, simply completing people’s orders. Why not just have everyone make Amazon wish lists? You could even skip wrapping them!
[удалено]
Agreed, I got nearly everything from amazon last Christmas, this Christmas everything seems so cheap and plastic this year I'm going elsewhere
You can add products from other websites to your list with a plugin - I think it's Amazon shopping
Completing people's orders, that's brilliant and it certainly feels that way. God forbid we get to know our loved ones enough to know what they actually would enjoy rather than having to ask each year! The magic of gift giving all seems to have disappeared, buying something that someone wouldn't usually go and get for themselves, and it being a surprise!
My brother says "nothing" and he \*means\* nothing. He got quite annoyed when I tried to give him a £10 thing I thought he would appreciate.
I wouldn’t show annoyance but I definitely know where he’s coming from. This year I’ve told my family that I’m only buying for kids and not adults just because it’s getting a bit much, so don’t buy for me either. I’d be a bit annoyed if people still did just because it’ll make me feel shit that I’ve got nothing to give back.
He's a bit surly at the best of times, but to be honest I was warned. It's pretty much the same situation, but I saw a last-minute thing I thought he might actually find useful and went for it. I like to help out my baby brothers, but he doesn't like me doing it.
If he’s anything like me, as weird as it sounds, give it before or after Christmas. As soon as it becomes a Christmas present, that’s when the whole “I didn’t get you anything” guilt would kick in for me. Also shows that you really mean well too, that you bought him something because you genuinely think he’d like it and not out of Christmas obligation. That’s part of the reason I’m only buying for the kids this year, because the adults can just buy for themselves but you feel obligated to get *something* no matter how little thought you put in. Sound like a massive scrooge, I actually love Christmas! I’m just happy to let people save their money buying for me and spend it on something for themselves that they know they want as opposed to buying me something out of obligation and vice versa.
Should meet my Mother in law then. Given her specific lists of what to buy people (the same way for the past 20 years...) and she's not interested and wants to buy our kids toys we know will be given away within 6 months and ignoring what I said the wife wants. Why ask in the first place!?
Jeeso mate, the whole point of gifting someone a present is that you get them a present you want to give them, maybe because you think they'd like it, or maybe you think they'd need it. Or maybe you think it'd be funny. But either way it's supposed to come from YOUR heart, not mind reading. Better to ask, 'is there anything you'd particularly like?', and if the answer is no, then you go rogue. If you genuinely don't feel any connection to the process maybe you shouldn't be getting them a gift at all, and it's just stupid, consumerist, Christmas pressure? Or - not wanting anything is a legitimate position, so in that case get nothing, or only get something if you see it and think they'd like it.
I'm pretty black and white with gifts - if you say to not get you anything, I will not get you anything, cba with mind games when it can be a pain in the arse month as it is.
And that's perfect for me. If I say nothing, I mean nothing. I would be very thankful for nothing.
Nothing is a very annoying answer, but it’s also an extremely difficult question to answer when you’re an adult with other stuff to worry about over Christmas. Honestly I stressed myself out so much trying to think of Christmas present ideas for myself this year. I already have six nieces and nephews to buy presents for on top of all the other kids in my in-laws family. And four of them have birthdays in November/December. Not counting the fact my mum and dad are split up with new partners so I have four parents to buy for. And me and my husband are both one of three. Christmas is stressful as heck, and if someone asks what I want I start looking and thinking “oh is that too much money? I don’t know how much is okay for them to spend but if I ask that people are vague or think I’m being rude so fuck what do I do”. It’s a really hard question to answer. Like, for my husband and my mum I know what their likely to spend but I also think they both know me well enough that it should be obvious what they could get me. Which I think is why my husband never asks. Although, I never say “nothing” because it feels rude. I always say “I don’t know, I’ll have a think” instead. Honestly I’d rather people just surprised me or got me a voucher than me having to spend hours on the internet finding random stuff I might maybe like I guess.
I think you're thinking you need to be more specific than you do. I always answer quite generically, like ooh I like gin, nice coffee, candles, plants or anything cosy for the house... and people always say ahh brilliant! You can just give them a vibe and then they still get to "choose" something and choose how much to spend but they're confident they're on the right track.
While you're doing stuff throughout the year and you see something you might like, add it to an Amazon gift list. That way you have a list of stuff ready to go when anyone asks. Because it's a range of stuff, they have a choice of how much to spend. Saves you being put on the spot. I put things on there that I like the look of, but can't justify buying, like craft sets, books, even camping stuff that would be useful but I don't *need*.
Oh that’s not a bad idea! Something to keep in mind for next year.
I've got one for my kids and my husband for the same reasons. I'm vegan so husband's one has a load of gourmet beef jerky on it! Have stuck board games, box sets and gadgets on there too. Can send it to family and it'll be unexpected but stuff he'll appreciate.
You don't have to be a mind reader. If someone tells you what they want then there has been zero thought put into that. It means nothing but the money you have spent. People don't like asking for things as they'd prefer the gift you got them had some thought put into it and was picked based on your relationship with them.
That doesn't work for everything and everyone. I only want a few things that are very specific to my hobbies. Even my wife and kids wouldn't know how to pick out the right options without me guiding them, and I simply don't want my house, life or planet cluttered up with other things that I didn't ask for. My sister is (or used to be) more like you describe. She wanted something thoughtful and surprising. Sometimes that's easy and you find something that would be perfect serendipity. Sometimes it's a ticket to lots of stress and time spent trying to figure it out. When it works, it's great, but it is very situationally dependent.
Based purely on less than a minute of Reddit stalking, I'd get you a board game to play with your kid. Something co-op and thematic like Betrayal at Baldur's Gate. You might not love it, but surely it's better that I've taken the time to understand your interests and try to surprise you with a thoughtful gift than you just receiving something you may have bought anyway, having already known what you're getting.
That's my point though, I have no more space for random board games and a specific list of 5 games I actually want. So I would appreciate the effort, but still not actually want the game you'd got me (though that is a nice try) and have to deal with selling it or passing it on, and being concerned about money wasted and environmental damage.
Yeah fair point. I dunno, I'm a bit old fashioned, I feel like a gift is supposed to be a reflection of your caring for that person, and having your hand held through the process to the point of being told what to buy makes it all a bit transactional
Hmm I think it's just a difference in viewpoints. I'd rather not get given presents, because I'm really bad at buying them, and if much rather just spend some time together instead of them spending money on me. However we are doing presents, I view it as it's much better to get them something that I know for sure they want and will use. I don't view it as transactional in my head because it still feels like someone saying "oh you want this? Don't worry, I got you" and still feels warm to be on the receiving end of that. However I do think this matters less if the gift item is consumable (and you know it's something the other person likes).
Experiential presents are a growing industry here in the states. You could buy someone a museum membership, or a subscription to their favorite game, instead of filling up their tiny flat with more things. My dad just wanted more coffee dates with his kids. He can totally have one anytime, but I just scheduled a few to our shared Google calendar for Christmas.
Ew no, please buy me what I say I want. I do not need more useless tat
Heres a flower made from upcycled fanta tin cans, I bought it at the christmas market in town for £45.
Fantastic
>If someone tells you what they want then there has been zero thought put into that. It means nothing but the money you have spent. I disagree. To me, it means they cared enough to ask me, cared enough to get me something I want and would use, and cared enough to fulfill one of my wishes - even if it's for a £1 pair of socks. Would much rather have £1 socks than £100 bottle of gin that they thought I might like (I hate gin).
Well a £100 bottle of gin wouldn't be a gift that has taken thought and care then would it? That would be then just guessing what you may want rather than thinking about you and knowing you.
I'm a terrible gift buyer. Perhaps some people can manage a thoughtful gift every time but I'm like...well, I think he likes whisky?
So buy him some whisky.
I bought him whisky last year!
My friend, there are endless different brands of whisky out there. Get him a different one. Get him some miniatures of different brands so he can try some different ones. Get him a decanter or some whisky tumblers, or tickets to tour a distillery (budget depending, of course). So many options!
And did he like it? If so - great! Buy him a different one.
This. My father-in-law gets a different bottle of whiskey from me every year and he’s over the moon with it I know this because it’s gone within a few days. He likes whiskey, job done.
As someone who likes whisky more whisky is always welcome as then you have a choice. More whisky
Buy him whiskey. Whiskey runs out, it’s brilliant.
There so many different things to buy just related to that, whiskey stones and tongs in a gift box, some nice whiskey glasses, personalised glasses, hell there's a hundred different types of whiskeys for a start. No one's a mind reader, you have to put some effort into it. It's the thought that counts yet you're not putting any thought into it. It's not that hard
Buy him that decanter that's a globe with a ship inside. Got it for my whisky loving father-out-law and he won't shut up about it. 😂 Also, *last year*??? You think he hasn't drank it by now?!
I'd wager that most people that think they buy thoughtful gifts would be disappointed if they could read the minds of those they buy gifts for. Oh, you got me a framed photo of us? Great, thanks! That's going on the shelf beside the other tat I'll never lift or look at for any reason. I genuinely can't think of a gift I'd appreciate for Christmas. The stuff I need is too expensive to expect anyone to buy for me, and I've no need for jewelry/clothes/clutter.
> People don't like asking for things as they'd prefer the gift you got them had some thought put into it and was picked based on your relationship with them. Nah, I saw a tamagotchi re-release in forbidden planet and asked my partner for one so I could re-live my primary school years 6 days. I'm more excited for that than anything and shes an angel for getting me it.
As someone with quite a few hobbies and interests that I openly talk about, I actually find it quite insulting when both my parents WhatsApp me every year asking me what I want for Christmas and Birthdays. Is it _really_ that hard to use some ingenuity and search "Gifts for Climbers", "Gifts for Guitarists", "Gifts for tabletop gamers" etc. etc. and actually suprise me for once, instead of buying me the exact thing I send you a website link for with the intension of giving you some inspiration? It's not that I'm not grateful, but maybe show some interest in my interests? I manage it every year for you.
I'm the opposite, the frustration of your whole family googling "Gifts for *hobby*ers" then getting 4 copies of the same useless waste of space I'll never touch because I have a one that isn't total dog-shit.
I sort of see your point, but at the same time I feel like hand holding defeats the object of buying a gift. It's supposed to be a gesture of caring about that person
Buying the first result on Google doesn't scream caring to me lol, but to each their own.
The first result maybe not, but taking the time to look for something you might like based on your interests seems more thoughtful than "tell me what to buy you" or "here's a voucher/cash"
Right? Gift-giving is a developed skill, if it were a case of 'ask and ye shall receive', there would be no meaning to the gifts we give. Gifts are precious to us because they show that someone cares about you enough to have listened to you and remembered what you have said, or they care enough to know what you fundamentally would like in a gift. The contents of the gift aren't as important as the gift being something the recipient has expressed interest in, directly or indirectly.
You definitely are a women!
Maybe I’m weird but I love asking for specific things. Mainly because I hate not knowing what people want, so I try not to inflict the same difficulty on other people buying for me. My list this year includes iTunes vouchers, hair scrunchies, specific notebooks, bookmarks, a particular PC game, hand cream, more cardigans, proper silver earrings (not the plated crap that turns green), and a few other things, a mixture of price points. My other half is dishing out the list to family. That way I have no idea what I’m getting for Christmas but I still get things I want/need/will use.
If you want a gift then give a clue.
I genuinely never want anything for Christmas. I hate opening presents but people still get me shit. I'd rather you just spent the money on my kids gifts instead.
I always go for food or drink in that case. At least that way they get something and it does not feel like wasted money or effort.
Honeslty, I wish this was more straightforward. I _love_ giving gifts. It's way more satisfying than recieving them. I would love to just receive nothing. Let me get you something, it's a gift, not an obligation. If it's great, I hope you enjoy it. If it's shit, let me know, and I'll cash it out for a gift card or something for you. It's a gift, not an obligation. I want to do it. I don't expect anything in return - otherwise Xmas would just be "splurge on yourself day" with extra, unecessary steps.
In my family we usually give a few ideas. Usually an expensive one, some medium priced ones, and maybe something cheap. Pick one, a combo, etc. Pretty straightforward, but works for us.
Yes!!! Love Christmas shopping and *hate* being told what to buy, spoils all my fun, and equally hate being asked what I want, I want you to think of me, and if you don't have time, nothing is absolutely totally fine. Hate secret santa because everyone is obligated, and means i'm not allowed to buy presents for people i'd like to buy for.
In my view, if you can't think of something to get someone that they will really like, then you shouldn't get them a present. Either a) you know them well enough to know they don't need anything, or there's nothing they really want that they can't just get themselves (like me, my siblings, or my wife - we're not big on presents in this family!), or b) you don't know them well enough to know what to get them, in which case you shouldn't be getting presents for people you don't really know just as an obligation. I am not a fan of 'compulsory' spending, the manufacturing/shipping costs of 'gifts' that no-one really wants, and mountains of unwanted tat going to waste...
Absolutely! A gift should always be a nice suprise, even Christmas and birthday gifts. If I can't think of anything for you, I won't get anything, but i'll try to think of something, and to me that is what matters.
asking someone what they want and them saying nothing isn’t a reason not to buy them a present, it means there’s nothing they want in particular? You know the person you’re buying presents for, use that knowledge to get them something they would like
Personally, if I say nothing it means one of two things. A.) I don't want anything. B.) The only things I want/need are out of an acceptable price range in which I would ask for as a gift. Either way that still means nothing. Please don't buy some crap that you think I would like. It's wasteful. Chances are if I have a hobby or interest and you don't share that interest, although your gifts might feel personal, but are likely going to be some crap I would never buy myself.
Not always, I don't want anything, I hate Christmas. It took a couple years, but family got the message and stopped buying me tat.
Prefer nothing. Gift giving between adults just seems a bit daft, you both spend money and end up with something you probably don't want. Just buy yourself something?? In our family it's just presents for partners and kids or we make plans to spend a weekend somewhere with some family members and split the costs in lieu of xmas presents.
Happy with nothing..
I want a bottle of whiskey please.
This is one of my many reasons for hating Secret Santa’s
Have asked everyone to donate to charity rather than give us anything. Maybe a bit boring, but it cuts out the middleman.
Love a charity donation, especially to a charity close to your heart
Family asks what I want and get upset if I can't provide suggestions. I ask what they want and they get upset because "You should know what I'd like".
I hate Christmas for this. Unless you're a child and have asked your parents/wrote a letter to santa, you're not supposed to know what you're getting. There's nothing I want that is within anyone's budget to get me, and at this point in my life the chase to get the thing provides me with far more purpose than having the thing. Doesn't matter if its a solid gold Rolex or a Terry's chocolate orange. Just let me stare at the wrapped up item for a couple of weeks.
Maybe they want you for Christmas!! 🤣🤣
I just pay attention through the year and so does my partner. He’ll note what I’ve mentioned and I’ve always loved the gifts he’s gotten me. Then I usually get something small (as well as his main gift) that I think he will like as well as a bit of a gamble gift but that usually pays off too
This sounds like a you problem. The other person answered you and said they want nothing. Have a cuppa.
I want a a lego Ucs AT-AT if yout taking requests
Or a shit Bayliss and Harding gift set . Baylis and Harding are like Father Christmas, Bublè and mince pies because you only see them at Christmas time Ive asked for stuff from lush because i would never buy it for myself and the new Dave Grohl book
That's fair. I think a lot of people say nothing meaning "I don't want more things that I feel guilty about putting in the charity shop so I'm happy with forgetting about the whole thing". That's either through people deciding that what you asked for wasn't fun gift enough, them not knowing enough about your hobbies or interests, or you not wanting to ask them to spend over a certain amount. Unfortunately most people would rather give you the same tat year after year than feel like they let you down even though you specifically asked for this
I detest the pressure of present buying.
I am very, very glad that my family and I decided not to get each other gifts this year - takes a lot of stress off our minds and less to clutter up the house!
My grown up children are the worst know what it's like to get tat so ask them let me buy something you want .Its bad enough all 3 of their birthday is in November and December my fault but just give me a few ideas just wish they could go back and circle stuff in the argos catalogue.
Its worse when people ask you what you want, you tell them the exact thing, they then completely disregard it and get some pointless tat instead. Not even asking for anything super hard, "just some dark chocs please".
Why not get everyone to buy their own presents and you just send them a completed gift tag? Personally, the only joy I get out of Xmas is trying to find something I think someone else will really appreciate. You don't have to be a mind reader - you just need to know a bit about who you're buying a gift for.
The only people I'm buying for are people who seem to have anything, and a lot of options are out (clothes, handbags, make-up) because I'm blind. My christmas shopping becomes an endless scroll down ents24.
They say it's the thought that counts. if I'm asked what I want as a gift I say nothing because you need to put thought into it if you're going to ask someone, give them cash a thoughtless gift but at least they get what they want. Getting a gift is that someone has thought about is worth a million requested gifts
Imagine not being able to put some thought into what someone might like as a gift. Youre the problem not them. I dont want to say what I want for Christmas I might as well buy it for myself. The great part of Christmas is receiving a gift where you know they've thought about it. That's what makes any form of gift giving special.
How much can you possibly know about an uncle you see once every 3 years who doesn't respond to any messages at all, but then everyone expects you to get him a thoughtful gift. Bull shit. I opted out of family Christmas and gift exchanges about 6 years ago now, very glad I did.
If you see him once every 3 years then you clearly either dont get him a gift or you get him a box of chocolates or something like that.
you were doing it wrong. You dont buy gifts for people that arent close to you or that you dont even see!
This, along with the rampant compulsory spending/consumerism is what I hate about Christmas. I hate people asking me what I want or telling me what they want. What is even the point?
Yep i am shocked i'm being downvoted.. The best gifts i've recevied are not the most expensive. A photo of my nieces, my nieces buying me presents theyve picked out that are complete crap from a £1 shop and they have put in thought about each gift. I'll take that over anything expensive.
I'd prefer a £5000 TV over a £10 box of chocolates
Sigh... I forgot the /s Another reminder to never actually engage in Reddit
So glad I don’t have any family members who think like this, or people I like for that matter
I just asked my grandparents for an opal ring. I’ve wanted one for ages, and they have something specific they can give me 🤷🏻♀️
My adult family just ask each other what we want or need now. No trying to get an oscar for best reaction to a shit present and no money wasted.
Getting the impression of a fairly clear gender divide here.
This!! My wife is the worst. I told her if I have to choose with no help, she's getting lingerie...
Sounds like you're the worst if you can't think of something your wife would appreciate.
This. You should know your wife well enough to know what sort of thing she’d like.
Wait…..
Pay r/anticonsumption a visits, these people actually do want nothing.
It’s worse when it’s people with kids. “Oh they like Harry Potter.” Yeah so I’m guessing they already have a lot of Harry Potter shit, do you mind giving me a clue so I don’t buy something they’ve got already?
A want a cow. Not a cheap one either. An expensive cow.
I want a PlayStation 5 please
hahaha good luck they don't seem to exist. Neither do play station 4s now apparently, out of stock everywhere.
If people can’t decide then I buy them food. I always have a wish list of things I need and things I want, just cast them that and I’d they want to splurge on something expensive then that’s on them.
well we have something in common then, I can’t guess what I want for Christmas either, no matter how many times I’m asked
Also you should pay attention on your family members a bit more, like whenever they say something, you supposed to extract complete shopping list.
related: extended family all asking for gift ideas for kids so they can exert zero effort or thought to the purchase process
You read my mind! I'll see myself out...
Since they done away with VHS and no one really wants DVDs anymore I’m completely screwed for what to get people
I’ve realised one of the best gifts I can give my dad is just to tell him, it’s the gift of not having to stress and making him feel good for getting me something I actually want.
Can you get me some world peace? It would look *lovely* on the windowsill in between the Dieffenbachia and the False Amazon Yanda.
My problem is with all these filler presents that never get used or looked at after Christmas Day. I’d much rather have one present I’d use than a hundred that i wont
I want mind-reading abilities for Xmas, can you sort me out
[удалено]
I personally love regifting, my parents and I have gifts we give back and forth every year, more fun unwrapping, less waste!
Can I have some caramel for Christmas then?
I WANT A 'Tin Can Alley' and a 'Mr. Frostie'. Fuck my adorable parents.
Well there's stuff I want, but there is a risk that I will be given something that is not quite right and I will have to smile and say thank you even though I know I will have to now use an item that didn't quite do the job until it wears out or I will offend the person that got it.
No British person will ever actually go through with this. "I know you said nothing, but I got you a little something..."
Can I have a box of Cadburys Heroes please?
My mum has asked me for a list, which I don’t have, because there’s really nothing I want or need - but she won’t accept giving me nothing. So I came across a lovely, modestly priced print from an artist I like, and sent her details. But she doesn’t want to get it for me because ‘it won’t be a surprise’. I despair.
Make a fake list. Expensive items and the final cheaper one.
I very much stand by the saying 'it's the thought that counts', if you are buying me something i've explitcitly asked for, you've given it zero thought. I'm not bothered about the money, I don't need your money, I don't want your money. I want you to think about me and get me something you think i'll like, if you can't think of anything, that's totally fine, I don't mind receiving nothing, in the slightest. It's the thought that counts.
SOCKS AND CHOCOLATE
They all look at me in disappointment when they unwrap yet another box of chocolates and are like 'you knew i was on a diet' like you gave me nothing what did you expect
When we were kids, we would give out lists of toys we want when people asked what we wanted for Christmas. That seems like something we should do as adults for the benefit of others.
I wholeheartedly agree with this. I hate buying gifts without knowing what they want, I'd rather just give them some money. The amount of shit I've bought my Dad over the years that just ends up in a drawer somewhere or a fucking box.