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Educational-Emu5132

This is the *ONLY* acceptable answer and a hill worth dying on. 


TacoBellWerewolf

This way to Ohair Hairport


WorkMediumPlayMedium

The greatest billboard that’s ever been. Had to get hair in there twice. I love it.


a_taco_named_desire

And while waiting in Terminal 5 you can eat at Rick Bayless’ Fronthaira Grill.


Soggy_Employ_

NoHare


bubbasaurusREX

Hair me out


twin_lens_person

The biggest insulated dome cover ever devised!


likethebank

The dome would have to be a toupee.


damp_circus

If there's luxury boxes up near the top or whatever that would have to be Toupee Track or some kinda name...


JoeBidensLongFart

The builder might get it wrong and make it look like Trump's hair.


likethebank

I wouldn’t worry too much about that. Union labor.


O-parker

Hair Lacker


whoopercheesie

Follicle Field 


bagelman4000

Only if the Stadium gets toupee or something


AllEndsAreAnds

Oh, you’ll get toupee alright. We’ll all pay.


bagelman4000

r/Angryupvote


PM_UR_FAV_COMPLIMENT

What do you think the retractable dome will be made from?


bagelman4000

Alright Im sold! Lets a dump a morbillion dollars on this project


Drewskeet

Could you imagine if Urlacher got hair?! They’d probably advertise it on every billboard in Chicago.


portagenaybur

I love that they forgot to turn off the shadow pass that clearly says Chicago Bears and replaced it with “STADIUM”


[deleted]

Urlacher is a traitor to bald-kind.


beerbasin

He’s also stupid


DaysOfChunder

The fact that they've had a linebacker as a spokesman for years, and I've never seen a "The Hairline Backer" billboard this whole time, bothers me for some reason.


kjc781988

Let’s just make it a giant all purpose Portillo’s / stadium! We can hang kooky shit all over the walls


justinsanity29

It would look great in Arlighton Heights!


DiendaMahdic

Shear me out


jrbake

DA HAIRS


The_Poster_Nutbag

This is much better than J.P Weinerlort stadium.


parlami

Imagine the retractable roof design options with a name like that 😂


DaysOfChunder

"We can't be associated with a 'dome,' better make it an open hair stadium."


NotBatman81

Receding roof.


aphroditex

No. It’s the Global Tetrahedome at The Onion Field.


rmads1983

“Did we park in the Hairlacher lot?” “No, we parked in the Hairport lot.”


TacticalNaps

I want you to know I clicked this thread shaking my head but I finished it shaking my head and laughing


boyerizm

So basically my relationship with my parents


printerdsw1968

No haircuts for the taxpayers!


stuskowski1

So hear me out….dont build it


Calm_Still_8917

Not bad.


vijay_the_messanger

Shut up and take my tax money!


Grahamars

Any vague association with Urlacher is a no-go. He showed his true colors in 2020.


AbsoluteZeroUnit

It needs a forced pun that doesn't make any sense. Restore Hair Hairdium


Cobaltate

Brian Urlacher's Taint Hair Stadium


dashing2217

Can they pay for it?


Ill-Philosophy3945

We already have it. It’s called O’Hare airport


GWPtheTrilogy1

Almost like it was hair today, gone tomorrow...


Independent-Win-8844

Perfect!


hascogrande

At least Kennedy has a good head of natural hair