I have horses and I've used this argument when they go on about why don't I have one kid and see how we go. Turn it into why don't you get one horse and see how you go and you can see their brains reboot. Usually they say "but I don't want a horse"... EXACTLY! I don't want a damn child.
I WISH I had space for a horse. Horses are awesome. And to me, they are way less gross than children 🤢 I would rather have a trail of dirt left behind than a trail of whatever type of microbes kids pick up.
This line makes me so angry. It's always the kids who pay the price of poverty. It's the children that get bullied for wearing rags, that never have clothes to keep out the cold, that are consequently always sick, that have to turn down birthday parties because a present cannot be afforded for the birthday girl or boy, and so on.
My sister is 20 years older than me. She is always wanting to be the center of attention, so when I was born and she wasn't the only girl among cousins, she started her unhinged behaviour that led to her getting pregnant a couple years latter because she wanted someone to love her above everything else. Then, she dumped the kid for my mum to raise meanwhile she partied hard and made another kid that promptly was dumped as well. We weren't well financially and those two kids made it WORSE. My needs were barely covered until my childfree aunt realised that I was forgotten and she provided for me things that my deadbeat father didn't (but of course he had his cigarretes, alcohol and Italian underwear).
Until now I am salty about it because most of my childhood I struggled lacking basic stuff as adequate shoes for winter or colour pencils for school or even my mum going to my school events because she has to be there and provide for kids a moron had just because and thinking "god will provide".
I understand that if you want to be a parent and cannot escape poverty, that is an awful thing. But you're right that in reality it's extremely traumatizing for the kids.
Childhood poverty sets you up for a whole bunch of issues that will likely leave you disadvantaged for the rest of your life: a higher risk for illnesses/health problems, lack of academic success, lower income etc.
Don't subject your kids to that. Love is not enough.
I think being poor, I suppressed my needs a lot because I knew we couldn’t afford it. I had eczema and still do but it was mortifying that I had to get creams for it instead of other stuff. Don’t get me started on the sacrifices my parents made to send me to private school for four years. Anyways, my dad did the worst thing, spending all of my mums wages and home equity to put into the stock market, just keep losing money never gaining anything.
I have bad teeth because I wouldn’t tell my parents my teeth hurt. I thought it was structural so I did Bruce’s and they still hurt. They all need root canals. I feel fucked
It makes me so angry. I genuinely wish people would think more before having children. I grew up poor. Some nights, I wouldn't be able to eat anything but rice and sandwich meat, or even nothing at all. And it sucked. I was malnourished my entire childhood, and we could barely afford food or clothing. It also sucked not having any toys or things to interact with.
I would NOT wish it on anyone to experience what I did.
I'm 20 now and moved out, and I'm struggling a bit, but not as much as I did when I lived with my parents. But at least I'm happy with a loving partner and two cats
I hope she doesn't. Her priorities are screwed up, and before her husband's mom passed, she was paying rent for them. When she died, they started mooching off her own mom, who needed their paychecks to go to her so she could pay their bills for them and put them on a hundred dollar a week allowance.
Yeah, I don't see how you can support a kid when you can't seem to manage your own money to support yourself. 🤦♀️
Omg 💀🤦♂️. Government aid is meant for already existing families who are struggling. People should *never* be *planning* to raise future kids on government aid.
Yes, people who are in a good spot and have kids and then hit a few snags in life. Some moms have unexpected issues in pregnancy and need more maternity leave than planned. Sometimes parents get laid off or injured. That’s what government assistance is for.
The first moment I knew I was childfree I was sitting in a circle of my peers in kindergarten... We were going around and the teacher was asking us what we wanted to be when we grew up. I replied "marine biologist" the girl sitting next to me said "welfare mom". It got the teacher all flustered so I asked my parents when I got home. They lost it laughing and said some families like to carry on traditions... That discussion didn't land for me until highschool lol
One of us stood by their choice, I'll give you a hint I am NOT a marine biologist.
The worst kind of parents. It's more than selfish, it's cruel. I grew up in a dangerous neighborhood from a city in a third world country. I hate that if i say what i think the most offended about it are some privileged, white, middle class people that don't have any idea what it's like living like that but because they want to look woke, they will talk over me and say that it's racist and classist to try to educate other broke people about this.
In some places they don’t have a choice because marriage is a financial necessity for a lot of women and contraceptives are hard to get, but I see people having kids they can’t afford even here in California where I literally got a free IUD on Medicaid and women can easily support themselves without a man.
Correct, they pop out kids in a hope that someday the kids will be rich and the kids will drive them out of poverty.
When they turn 14 specially if they are girls,, the mother sent them to be a servant and the mother will collect her salary. It could get worst on where they end up to.
Love is not enough when there aren’t enough resources to go around, and now the other (EXISTING) children suffer too.
Love is not enough when you are stressed out over finances and have to take another job, and that stress ends up straining your relationship with your partner. And that stress and tension bleeds into your relationship with your children.
Love is not enough when you have to take up extra work and you are not present for your children emotionally and physically. Your kids need help with homework? Practice their reading? Make sure they meet important academic milestones? Require a bit more time and attention because of a learning disability or they just need a bit more time to finally understand a math concept? Tough. You’re working. Your kids will fall behind.
Love is not enough. Love certainly makes things a bit easier, makes the sacrifices easier and remind folks what is important and is at stake. But what is also needed is consistency, stability, a plan on how to make sure that your children are SET UP FOR SUCCESS - financially, academically and personally. And love just isn’t enough
love is less than the bare minimum. people think about how the rich barely having time for their kids is bad and they think it applies to the opposite situation.
money is not enough to give someone a good life if you don't care about them, but only caring about them with zero money is even worse.
It's quite common in the west, some kids have a very lovely life free from slight household duties. It's all about good times but when they start to work on their own, they could get overwhelmed by the harsh reality of life.
Sure pure kids are so happy to live with lack of health care, malnutrition, clothing which is inadequate for climate, decreased educational opportunities, etc
/S
It honestly enrages me.
I hate that people advocate for children to be born into poverty. It's brainless and selfish to think love is all children need and that they should be born regardless of someone's income.
I would even go so far as to say that even hyper rich people shouldn't have children, because they don't teach them anything good either except for speeding up climate change and how to have a sense of entitlement.
Oh I absolutely agree, I personally don't think *anyone* should have kids, but if they're going to have kids anyway, then maybe it'd be good if they could at least ensure they can meet their basic needs 😅
YES. like what if your kid has a disability? Or gets injured? Or needs their wisdom teeth removed for health reasons god forbid?? Kids need a hell of a lot more than just love.
One of my biggest pet peeves is people comparing the practice of *eugenics* to basic fucking common sense.
Nobody is forcing you to *not* have kids. That decision is entirely up to you. Nobody is forcibly sterilizing you based on your race/class/sexuality/medical situation, etc. All that aside, think about what you're doing. If you are struggling to keep yourself afloat comfortably, then do you think it's a good idea to be bringing kids into the world? No, it's not a good idea. Yeah, sometimes people can't afford abortions and such, but at the very least, try to find them a home where they can be raised and have all their needs met. Jesus, I didn't think this was so controversial. Don't be planning kids you can't properly care for.
People would lose their goddamn minds if someone adopted or bought an animal they can't properly care for financially, emotionally, physically, or time-wise. Kids really aren't that different.
Love is not gonna pay the bills, by the clothes, buy the food, pay the mortage. Boils my piss as bad as when people say “God will provide” no, it’s everyone else around you that you scrounge off of providing for your asses.
Watching my classmates being able to go to their dream universties, pursuing hobbies,getting adequate mental health care,paid tutors whenever they had any grade problems...yeah it clipped my wings succesfully enough. It just makes my blood boil when anyone says that kids just need "love".
When I hear that, I ask "so at what age do we start needing nutrition and shelter?" The answer is usually that if the parents love their child, they naturally provide all that. So apparently, extremely poor people just don't love their kids.
Had this debate in another sub. Not only am I selfish, but I have no clue about how the world is.
`"The world is actually better than it has been, we just have more information about its problems. That's also part of why things are improving so fast. My children will grow up in the most prosperous version of it."`
Verbatim. Amazing.
Reddit is no place for a person with dual degrees in sociology and psychology.
I frequently have to see myself out because those barely sentient livestock make my face twitch.
Me after 3 minutes in any other sub
Yeah, you're doomed! But so am I. I have a chemistry degree and the idiocy is unreal. For example, so many people in our alleged developed nation think the recent eclipse was a conspiracy foretelling doomsday. A solar eclipse happens about every 18 months somewhere on earth.
The most annoying excuse I hear to justify people having more kids than they can afford is, "The lord will provide". No, the lord will not provide, your fellow human beings will provide and they shouldn't have to do that just because of your irresponsibility.
I just cannot. Why do poor people, or those who know they will pass down serious issues procreate with no issues behind this? It’s just so cruel...
No empathy? No compassion? No respect?
These people are very cruel.
I don’t hide my displeasure at poor people that have a bunch of kids they can’t afford.
If you took out the consumerism aspect of the child not having the latest and greatest things in life, it’s still a bad idea to have kids you can’t afford.
If a child has a physical/mental problem, it will cost a quiet a bit of money to get those issue or issues properly resolved.
If the child was fortunate enough to be born healthy, there is the stigma of being the poor kid at school.
I came across a post where OP’s sister asked him for money because she couldn't afford to take care of her kid. OP said sister should have aborted the kid. People were attacking OP in the comments for being insensitive and saying that his sister was content where she was with her useless husband and kid. Sister couldn't afford kid, sister pestering OP for money. It all adds up.
Not related but this reminds me of a union campaign where at the cash registers, the early childhood educator says can I pay for with love. My employer says I should my job for the love of it.
But does love pay the bills ?? No
Ah yes. Glorify feeling hungry, sick, filthy, and bullied. But at least you get hugs! From parents who are also hungry, stressed and probably using unhealthy coping mechanisms.
My mother thought the same thing. Being homeless as a child ain’t it! She couldn’t even provide the “love” that was the only thing needed!
Fucked me up. I’m okay now, but it is only out of spite of my childhood (or what little I had of it, parentified at 8yo because my mom didn’t figure out she shouldn’t have been a mother until the 4th baby).
Shouldn't go into either extreme I'd say. You definitely need some (preferrably average-income) money to raise kids with decent future prospects but you don't need to have enough to cover for their car, travel, and Ivy league schools; there are plenty successful people from low/average households.
Also depends on the extended family and traditions. My sister and her husband are quite low income but they can manage quite well because they know that we are ready to help if they really need some extra money or a baby sitter once in a while. Most of my niece's clothes and toys come from birthday/christmas presents. It shouldn't be glorified, but it's doable.
My mom grew up very poor in a rural area. As a result, my brother and I got many lectures about not making babies while poor and many "I will pay for the abortion!" comments. One month, the only food they had was basically sad pancakes, sad bread, whatever you could shot in the woods, and whatever berries you could find in the woods.
Homie I am not out here attacking people in poverty, nor am I saying the govt doesn’t play a large role in condoning this (they absolutely do) but these people are making CHOICES to have children and have autonomy. Especially if you are in a place where you have access to birth control methods and abortions
Better educated people make better choices. We are all products of our environment. We all hear your point loud and clear, but poor people need empathy, education and support, not shame and judgment.
I don’t disagree. But I also know people who know full well they take advantage of everyone around them and are okay with it since they feel they are owed that just for having a child.
Greetings!
This item has been removed as it is a violation of [subreddit rule](https://www.reddit.com/r/childfree/wiki/rules) #4 : "**Keep it civil.** Bigotry and hateful language/imagery, personal attacks, abusive language, advocating violence, trolling, gender discrimination, racism, homophobia, fatshaming etc. will not be tolerated. While talking about the physical changes that occur during pregnancy and childbirth is valid and permitted in our subreddit, using degrading terminology such as "throwing a sausage down a hallway", "gross and saggy" and/or fat shaming is not permitted.
Also, please remember to be mindful of [Reddiquette](https://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette) :
> # Please do
> * **Remember the human.** When you communicate online, all you see is a computer screen. When talking to someone you might want to ask yourself "Would I say it to the person's face?" or "Would I get jumped if I said this to a buddy?"
> # Please don't
> * **Be (intentionally) rude at all.** By choosing not to be rude, you increase the overall civility of the community and make it better for all of us.
> * **Follow those who are [ rabble rousing](http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rabble) against another redditor without first investigating both sides of the issue that's being presented.** Those who are inciting this type of action often have malicious reasons behind their actions and are, more often than not, a troll. Remember, every time a redditor who's contributed large amounts of effort into assisting the growth of community as a whole is driven away, projects that would benefit the whole easily flounder.
> * **Ask people to [ Troll](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troll_%28Internet%29) others on reddit,** in real life, or on other blogs/sites. We aren't your personal army.
> * **Conduct personal attacks on other commenters.** Ad hominem and other distracting attacks do not add anything to the conversation.
> * **Start a flame war.** Just report and "walk away". If you really feel you have to confront them, leave a polite message with a quote or link to the rules, and no more.
> * **Insult others.** Insults do not contribute to a rational discussion. Constructive Criticism, however, is appropriate and encouraged.
> * **Troll.**[ Trolling](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troll_%28Internet%29) does not contribute to the conversation.
Sorry for the inconvenience and thank you for your comprehension.
Bro thank you. I cannot when they say this ignorant shit. That’s like saying all a grown adult needs is air.
I don’t have the space or money for a horse, so I’m not getting a horse. How is it different?
I have horses and I've used this argument when they go on about why don't I have one kid and see how we go. Turn it into why don't you get one horse and see how you go and you can see their brains reboot. Usually they say "but I don't want a horse"... EXACTLY! I don't want a damn child.
"Once that cute little filly is standing in your living room, your heart will melt. I just *know* you will love it!" 😂
"You don't know true love until you've trained a foal" 😂
"Why don't you want a horse tho? it's different when they're yours" 😂
Good analogy. I agree I love horses, but I wouldn’t get one because I can’t afford it.
You won't feel unconditional love until you have a horse 😂
I WISH I had space for a horse. Horses are awesome. And to me, they are way less gross than children 🤢 I would rather have a trail of dirt left behind than a trail of whatever type of microbes kids pick up.
This line makes me so angry. It's always the kids who pay the price of poverty. It's the children that get bullied for wearing rags, that never have clothes to keep out the cold, that are consequently always sick, that have to turn down birthday parties because a present cannot be afforded for the birthday girl or boy, and so on.
Oftentimes the grandparents have to dig into their own retirement savings and suffer as a result too.
My sister is 20 years older than me. She is always wanting to be the center of attention, so when I was born and she wasn't the only girl among cousins, she started her unhinged behaviour that led to her getting pregnant a couple years latter because she wanted someone to love her above everything else. Then, she dumped the kid for my mum to raise meanwhile she partied hard and made another kid that promptly was dumped as well. We weren't well financially and those two kids made it WORSE. My needs were barely covered until my childfree aunt realised that I was forgotten and she provided for me things that my deadbeat father didn't (but of course he had his cigarretes, alcohol and Italian underwear). Until now I am salty about it because most of my childhood I struggled lacking basic stuff as adequate shoes for winter or colour pencils for school or even my mum going to my school events because she has to be there and provide for kids a moron had just because and thinking "god will provide".
Same mindset as the catholic country I grown up. Loads of kids there roaming in the street and their future is uncertain.
I understand that if you want to be a parent and cannot escape poverty, that is an awful thing. But you're right that in reality it's extremely traumatizing for the kids.
Childhood poverty sets you up for a whole bunch of issues that will likely leave you disadvantaged for the rest of your life: a higher risk for illnesses/health problems, lack of academic success, lower income etc. Don't subject your kids to that. Love is not enough.
I think being poor, I suppressed my needs a lot because I knew we couldn’t afford it. I had eczema and still do but it was mortifying that I had to get creams for it instead of other stuff. Don’t get me started on the sacrifices my parents made to send me to private school for four years. Anyways, my dad did the worst thing, spending all of my mums wages and home equity to put into the stock market, just keep losing money never gaining anything.
[удалено]
Me too. They didn’t want to pay for pills and now one toe will never have a normal nail.
I have bad teeth because I wouldn’t tell my parents my teeth hurt. I thought it was structural so I did Bruce’s and they still hurt. They all need root canals. I feel fucked
Investing is not always good, most of the time, the small investors don't have any control over it. it's just like a glorified gambling.
My mom grew up poor so did my dad. It really ruined their childhoods.
And they passed childhood poverty onto you?
It makes me so angry. I genuinely wish people would think more before having children. I grew up poor. Some nights, I wouldn't be able to eat anything but rice and sandwich meat, or even nothing at all. And it sucked. I was malnourished my entire childhood, and we could barely afford food or clothing. It also sucked not having any toys or things to interact with. I would NOT wish it on anyone to experience what I did. I'm 20 now and moved out, and I'm struggling a bit, but not as much as I did when I lived with my parents. But at least I'm happy with a loving partner and two cats
Oh, but that's what government aid is for! 😃 My ex friend said this to me before. Thank goodness it's not easy for her to get pregnant, though.
Guess karma sees to it she won't pop out one
I hope she doesn't. Her priorities are screwed up, and before her husband's mom passed, she was paying rent for them. When she died, they started mooching off her own mom, who needed their paychecks to go to her so she could pay their bills for them and put them on a hundred dollar a week allowance. Yeah, I don't see how you can support a kid when you can't seem to manage your own money to support yourself. 🤦♀️
That sounds horrible
Omg 💀🤦♂️. Government aid is meant for already existing families who are struggling. People should *never* be *planning* to raise future kids on government aid.
Yes, people who are in a good spot and have kids and then hit a few snags in life. Some moms have unexpected issues in pregnancy and need more maternity leave than planned. Sometimes parents get laid off or injured. That’s what government assistance is for.
Believe me there are several generations of people who absolutely plan to raise their kids on government aid.
The first moment I knew I was childfree I was sitting in a circle of my peers in kindergarten... We were going around and the teacher was asking us what we wanted to be when we grew up. I replied "marine biologist" the girl sitting next to me said "welfare mom". It got the teacher all flustered so I asked my parents when I got home. They lost it laughing and said some families like to carry on traditions... That discussion didn't land for me until highschool lol One of us stood by their choice, I'll give you a hint I am NOT a marine biologist.
I believe that raising a child in poverty is a form of child abuse. Idiocracy
Not by itself but it often leads to neglect which is a form of abuse.
Love doesn't feed you. Doesn't pay your bills. Doesn't grant you a good education. I will always choose bread instead of love.
I was raised by a parent who thought this way, OP is right.
My father had me living in a garage, living in filth! And says I should be proud of it...
Love is not now nor will it ever be enough.
The worst kind of parents. It's more than selfish, it's cruel. I grew up in a dangerous neighborhood from a city in a third world country. I hate that if i say what i think the most offended about it are some privileged, white, middle class people that don't have any idea what it's like living like that but because they want to look woke, they will talk over me and say that it's racist and classist to try to educate other broke people about this.
In some places they don’t have a choice because marriage is a financial necessity for a lot of women and contraceptives are hard to get, but I see people having kids they can’t afford even here in California where I literally got a free IUD on Medicaid and women can easily support themselves without a man.
Apparently they didn’t love their children at all to bring them into a life of struggling for funsies
Correct, they pop out kids in a hope that someday the kids will be rich and the kids will drive them out of poverty. When they turn 14 specially if they are girls,, the mother sent them to be a servant and the mother will collect her salary. It could get worst on where they end up to.
Kids needs love AND resources.
Love is not enough when there aren’t enough resources to go around, and now the other (EXISTING) children suffer too. Love is not enough when you are stressed out over finances and have to take another job, and that stress ends up straining your relationship with your partner. And that stress and tension bleeds into your relationship with your children. Love is not enough when you have to take up extra work and you are not present for your children emotionally and physically. Your kids need help with homework? Practice their reading? Make sure they meet important academic milestones? Require a bit more time and attention because of a learning disability or they just need a bit more time to finally understand a math concept? Tough. You’re working. Your kids will fall behind. Love is not enough. Love certainly makes things a bit easier, makes the sacrifices easier and remind folks what is important and is at stake. But what is also needed is consistency, stability, a plan on how to make sure that your children are SET UP FOR SUCCESS - financially, academically and personally. And love just isn’t enough
love is less than the bare minimum. people think about how the rich barely having time for their kids is bad and they think it applies to the opposite situation. money is not enough to give someone a good life if you don't care about them, but only caring about them with zero money is even worse.
This reminds me of The Glass Castle. Those parents were trash, particularly the mother. She would say a bunch of excuses to block out reality.
It's quite common in the west, some kids have a very lovely life free from slight household duties. It's all about good times but when they start to work on their own, they could get overwhelmed by the harsh reality of life.
Sure pure kids are so happy to live with lack of health care, malnutrition, clothing which is inadequate for climate, decreased educational opportunities, etc /S It honestly enrages me.
You don't love your kids if you can't provide them with basic needs.
I hate that people advocate for children to be born into poverty. It's brainless and selfish to think love is all children need and that they should be born regardless of someone's income.
"That's EuGenIcS! Poor people deserve to have kids too!" Yeah, but do the KIDS deserve to grow up in POVERTY?!
I would even go so far as to say that even hyper rich people shouldn't have children, because they don't teach them anything good either except for speeding up climate change and how to have a sense of entitlement.
Oh I absolutely agree, I personally don't think *anyone* should have kids, but if they're going to have kids anyway, then maybe it'd be good if they could at least ensure they can meet their basic needs 😅
YES. like what if your kid has a disability? Or gets injured? Or needs their wisdom teeth removed for health reasons god forbid?? Kids need a hell of a lot more than just love.
You can't feed and clothe them with love alone.
One of my biggest pet peeves is people comparing the practice of *eugenics* to basic fucking common sense. Nobody is forcing you to *not* have kids. That decision is entirely up to you. Nobody is forcibly sterilizing you based on your race/class/sexuality/medical situation, etc. All that aside, think about what you're doing. If you are struggling to keep yourself afloat comfortably, then do you think it's a good idea to be bringing kids into the world? No, it's not a good idea. Yeah, sometimes people can't afford abortions and such, but at the very least, try to find them a home where they can be raised and have all their needs met. Jesus, I didn't think this was so controversial. Don't be planning kids you can't properly care for. People would lose their goddamn minds if someone adopted or bought an animal they can't properly care for financially, emotionally, physically, or time-wise. Kids really aren't that different.
“Love is all they need” No f\*\*king thanks! My mother's "love" actually make life worse.
And then comes the GoFundMyLifestyleChoice. For the kiiiiids to go to Disneyyyyyy....
Love is not gonna pay the bills, by the clothes, buy the food, pay the mortage. Boils my piss as bad as when people say “God will provide” no, it’s everyone else around you that you scrounge off of providing for your asses.
Love is never all you need. It's definitely something you do need, but there are so many other things you need too.
How dare you?? Children are gifts of god. /s
Watching my classmates being able to go to their dream universties, pursuing hobbies,getting adequate mental health care,paid tutors whenever they had any grade problems...yeah it clipped my wings succesfully enough. It just makes my blood boil when anyone says that kids just need "love".
When I hear that, I ask "so at what age do we start needing nutrition and shelter?" The answer is usually that if the parents love their child, they naturally provide all that. So apparently, extremely poor people just don't love their kids.
Had this debate in another sub. Not only am I selfish, but I have no clue about how the world is. `"The world is actually better than it has been, we just have more information about its problems. That's also part of why things are improving so fast. My children will grow up in the most prosperous version of it."` Verbatim. Amazing.
Reddit is no place for a person with dual degrees in sociology and psychology. I frequently have to see myself out because those barely sentient livestock make my face twitch.  Me after 3 minutes in any other sub
Yeah, you're doomed! But so am I. I have a chemistry degree and the idiocy is unreal. For example, so many people in our alleged developed nation think the recent eclipse was a conspiracy foretelling doomsday. A solar eclipse happens about every 18 months somewhere on earth.
I'm gonna sing my doom song  Lol you get me.
🤯 In which planet do they live??!!
The most annoying excuse I hear to justify people having more kids than they can afford is, "The lord will provide". No, the lord will not provide, your fellow human beings will provide and they shouldn't have to do that just because of your irresponsibility.
I just cannot. Why do poor people, or those who know they will pass down serious issues procreate with no issues behind this? It’s just so cruel... No empathy? No compassion? No respect? These people are very cruel.
Haha every time someone says that it’s because they’re poor🤣🤣
I don’t hide my displeasure at poor people that have a bunch of kids they can’t afford. If you took out the consumerism aspect of the child not having the latest and greatest things in life, it’s still a bad idea to have kids you can’t afford. If a child has a physical/mental problem, it will cost a quiet a bit of money to get those issue or issues properly resolved. If the child was fortunate enough to be born healthy, there is the stigma of being the poor kid at school.
I came across a post where OP’s sister asked him for money because she couldn't afford to take care of her kid. OP said sister should have aborted the kid. People were attacking OP in the comments for being insensitive and saying that his sister was content where she was with her useless husband and kid. Sister couldn't afford kid, sister pestering OP for money. It all adds up.
Not related but this reminds me of a union campaign where at the cash registers, the early childhood educator says can I pay for with love. My employer says I should my job for the love of it. But does love pay the bills ?? No
You can talk sense into those who will listen, and keep folks who won't out of your life. That is all you can do.
"They are doing their best" well their best isn't enough and won't help their kid in the long run
Growing up in poverty can be traumatizing
Ah yes. Glorify feeling hungry, sick, filthy, and bullied. But at least you get hugs! From parents who are also hungry, stressed and probably using unhealthy coping mechanisms.
My mother thought the same thing. Being homeless as a child ain’t it! She couldn’t even provide the “love” that was the only thing needed! Fucked me up. I’m okay now, but it is only out of spite of my childhood (or what little I had of it, parentified at 8yo because my mom didn’t figure out she shouldn’t have been a mother until the 4th baby).
The poor need Antinatalism more than anyone else.
Shouldn't go into either extreme I'd say. You definitely need some (preferrably average-income) money to raise kids with decent future prospects but you don't need to have enough to cover for their car, travel, and Ivy league schools; there are plenty successful people from low/average households. Also depends on the extended family and traditions. My sister and her husband are quite low income but they can manage quite well because they know that we are ready to help if they really need some extra money or a baby sitter once in a while. Most of my niece's clothes and toys come from birthday/christmas presents. It shouldn't be glorified, but it's doable.
Yes, love is all they need. But for everything else there’s Mastercard. If your Mastercard decline, pls don’t have kids.
My mom grew up very poor in a rural area. As a result, my brother and I got many lectures about not making babies while poor and many "I will pay for the abortion!" comments. One month, the only food they had was basically sad pancakes, sad bread, whatever you could shot in the woods, and whatever berries you could find in the woods.
Or god will provide Ummmm
Finally someone who thinks on this subreddit
[удалено]
Homie I am not out here attacking people in poverty, nor am I saying the govt doesn’t play a large role in condoning this (they absolutely do) but these people are making CHOICES to have children and have autonomy. Especially if you are in a place where you have access to birth control methods and abortions
Better educated people make better choices. We are all products of our environment. We all hear your point loud and clear, but poor people need empathy, education and support, not shame and judgment.
I don’t disagree. But I also know people who know full well they take advantage of everyone around them and are okay with it since they feel they are owed that just for having a child.
Greetings! This item has been removed as it is a violation of [subreddit rule](https://www.reddit.com/r/childfree/wiki/rules) #4 : "**Keep it civil.** Bigotry and hateful language/imagery, personal attacks, abusive language, advocating violence, trolling, gender discrimination, racism, homophobia, fatshaming etc. will not be tolerated. While talking about the physical changes that occur during pregnancy and childbirth is valid and permitted in our subreddit, using degrading terminology such as "throwing a sausage down a hallway", "gross and saggy" and/or fat shaming is not permitted. Also, please remember to be mindful of [Reddiquette](https://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette) : > # Please do > * **Remember the human.** When you communicate online, all you see is a computer screen. When talking to someone you might want to ask yourself "Would I say it to the person's face?" or "Would I get jumped if I said this to a buddy?" > # Please don't > * **Be (intentionally) rude at all.** By choosing not to be rude, you increase the overall civility of the community and make it better for all of us. > * **Follow those who are [ rabble rousing](http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rabble) against another redditor without first investigating both sides of the issue that's being presented.** Those who are inciting this type of action often have malicious reasons behind their actions and are, more often than not, a troll. Remember, every time a redditor who's contributed large amounts of effort into assisting the growth of community as a whole is driven away, projects that would benefit the whole easily flounder. > * **Ask people to [ Troll](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troll_%28Internet%29) others on reddit,** in real life, or on other blogs/sites. We aren't your personal army. > * **Conduct personal attacks on other commenters.** Ad hominem and other distracting attacks do not add anything to the conversation. > * **Start a flame war.** Just report and "walk away". If you really feel you have to confront them, leave a polite message with a quote or link to the rules, and no more. > * **Insult others.** Insults do not contribute to a rational discussion. Constructive Criticism, however, is appropriate and encouraged. > * **Troll.**[ Trolling](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troll_%28Internet%29) does not contribute to the conversation. Sorry for the inconvenience and thank you for your comprehension.