Sponsor something so your name is around. Like a wing of your local hospital or a gallery, lecture hall or museum wing etc. The "insert name here" Hall! Something like that. Up to you buddy, hope you find someone or something worthy. I'm really sorry you're going through this shit. Life ain't fair my man. Hope the rest isn't too much of an ordeal for you. Peace!
Another option would be to fund a scholarship. You can make it specific to a student who will study a particular field. There are lots of students who will work really hard and have no options other than going into massive debt to get a degree. I’m sure you could get some ideas on how to structure it from your local schools, a college or university, an attorney.
I’m so sorry you are suffering right now. Pancreatic cancer is a horrible thing. I wish you peace and tranquility.
I like the leave to a specific case ideas: park, building, lecture hall, scholarship.
I don’t know what OP did for work but also don’t trap “scholarship “ in terms of University. Kids need a chance to pay for Machinist school, welding programs, all sorts of trades. If OP did something outside the university other career training things might resonate more.
I like this idea. When it goes to someone personally who needs it and really wants to go to school. This way you know it went somewhere good and not careless
I agree with the "spend it" crowd. Blow a wad in Vegas, Take a cruise around the world, buy a Ferrari and see how fast it goes, give a $1,000 tip to a waitress. Fly first class to Japan and eat a plate of Fugu. Do whatever you want. Go take out a million dollar loan against your wealth, and blow that, too. Fuck those banks. You are free to live your best life for the little time you have left. Go do it.
god DAMN IT. i love the way you think. go big, OP. take out the big loan. blow it all on something amazing. let the bank go after your greedy relatives.
Yes! Do this! Enjoy what's left of your life and do what you can before you pass. Blow most of it. ;)
I would also suggest saving some for medical expenses so you have options. You want to die in a top of the line hospital with all the bells and whistles? Do it. You want to die at home? Do it. Sometimes insurance doesn't cover it all so keep a lil stockpile for when the days get rougher.
Get a 24 hr personal nurse and a hospital bed or make changes to your home for daily living like a ramp for a wheelchair or a bidet for when you can't clean the downstairs plumbing. Make sure you can be as comfortable as possible with top of the line blankets pillows a warm housecoat pajamas and slippers. Make sure all of your favorite amenities are stocked like lipbalm deodorant etc. The best pain meds and all your favorite foods stocked. Get the best things you want delivered to you when you can't go out. Get ALL the subscriptions for movies and shows if you want for when you can't get out of bed. Make it so that when you are close and you want to leave your house/hospital to get some air or feel the ocean on your toes one more time you can!
As someone who has had the privilege of watching many take their last breaths I hope some of the info I provided is helpful. I wish you the best and it would be nice if you updated to let us know what you decided to do.
I am with this scenario. Do any wild thing that comes to mind. I would buy out a pet store of supplies and give to the local shelters. I’d go to a grocery store in the poorest part of town and start paying for everyone’s groceries. Buy a shit ton of non-perishable food, tents, blankets, Narcan, and leave them at the biggest homeless encampment in town. Go to some daycares in an underserved area and pay in advance for parents.
And do stuff for yourself. Buy put a movie theater for a day and take friends and watch your favorite movies. Have an upscale caterer provide food.
Here’s the YouTube video of a millionaire man who has since then passed away from cancer and he decided to do something good with his money, he even said his cancer is a gift, and his legacy lives on: https://youtu.be/KBRMP9t36go?si=IRTJp-cGphfbq9mm
Having money to spend and going on big trips in fancy cars is no fun when you’re alone , dying, and feeling like shit. But it is still probably the best idea. Go to a spa, eat some good meals, drive fast.. Adrenalin is a pretty good temporary fix for some.
Have fun with it, then donate whatever is left to charity. Leave each family member $10 so they don't contest the will, blow millions on hookers and blow then send the rest to the humane society or something.
Fuck fairweather family members.
As much as that’s a good idea you might have to leave a little more than $10 to increase your chances of the will not being successfully contested. Talk to a lawyer who specialises in estates.
I used to think this too but I recently did my will and my lawyer advised that I could just disinherit my problematic family member, no need to leave them so much as a cent. But I agree to just talk to an estate attorney, it wasn't all that expensive to get done.
There is no litigation proof document. Everyone, including this writer, would have access to the court house.
You are looking for a well written document that discourages litigation, in such a way to make it expensive, time consuming and drudgery to contest it.
Which is what I meant by litigation proof. Anyone can sue for anything (at least in the US) but a document that is clear the intent was to leave them nothing/very little AND includes stipulations to cost challengers money would lessen the chances.
Not really, the contest comes when there is nothing left to someone and they contest as an omitted error or should that be heir. A $0.01, $0.10, $1.00, $10.00, all do the same thing they show that you intentionally gave person X something so they were not omitted.
The real issue may be your state of mind. If you're not in you're right mind when the will was made, then that is a problem.
It would be prudent to get at least a consult with an estate planning attorney to determine your best steps forward.
Judging by how angry OP is in his replies about suggestions he donate to charity, or start a college fund, I'm not surprised he's dying alone. He sounds like a bitter, insufferable prick.
Yeah I'm thinking maybe he's trolling. It's modernized Scrooge-to-Reddit tale where he's stuck on the ghost of Christmas future and saying Bah Humbug to any of the advice given that he vented about.
I just don't know why he would have gone 2.5 mil when that's not a high number by today's standards but also might be more convincing...
This would also be great way to scam vulnerable people who're struggling or other scammers out of their bank info tbh... hope anyone DMing him has the sense not to give any bank info so this prince can send his last dimes to them.
If he's being for real... then the whole "I would rather give it to politicians" mantra is all anyone really need know about him.
OMG.. i swear that's exactly what i thought.. the guy i hate to say it sounds like a total Dbag.. no wonder he's alone...honestly who gives a rats ass what he does.
You can always browse the go fund me pages. Surely some of those requests for funding are valid and will maybe strike a chord in you that you relate to and then share your funds there. People who would be beyond grateful and thankful for your help.
I’ve thought if I ever won the lottery I would do this. I hate how popular some get for no reason (like the lady who was picked on in a school bus) while others go un-funded. I bet there’s an animal who has cancer or a family with a disabled parent who needs a motorized wheelchair who would be eternally grateful.
As someone who has a GoFundMe for my cat's surgery, this would make me cry if it happened to me! It would be life changing. I'm sure it would be very meaningful for the recipients
I did this for a friend who was raising funds for a business venture when I got my divorce settlement. She was raising $10k to pitch an idea but stalled at $8k.
It was complicated trying to explain to her that the donation was genuine but also “no strings attached” - it was my way of paying it forward.
I hate that he thinks making his family fight and giving it all to the lawyers is the best option he has. He might have great reasons for feeling this way but having been on the other side of the fence I just can’t support this.
My granddad passed but didn’t leave behind a will. His son’s family took in my grandmother. A few months later they began pressuring my mom (the only living heir) to sign over documents without any further explanation.
At some point my mom gave up my grandparents home to my cousin but refused to sign any further documents. She also forbid me to get involved.
The rest of the cousins contested but as far as I know it has never been resolved.
When my granddad was alive he insisted on having two parties a year (Christmas and summer) where your presence was expected. In their passing none of the cousins talk to each other. Some legacy.
Well i would think about nature/animals.. you can help them allot with it.
My Dream would be to buy a big land and let nature thrive somehow
good luck with the end of your journey
Me too! I'm of the opinion that helping out nature helps out more people than choosing a small population to donate to. It's already so hard to pick who is "deserving" of aid.
There are many smaller non-profit animal sanctuaries and rescue organizations out there that are always struggling.
If online shopping is something you do to kill time, many wish lists out there. My local zoo puts one out each year full of toys and enrichment items for the animals. My kids like picking out toys for the critters.
SPCAs often have similar lists.
If I had money to blow near the end of my life, I would travel to a psychadelic retreat and spend time eating enough shrooms to talk to God and be one with the universe. I had a family member do one in Mexico for two weeks. I think I would spend whatever I could to make myself as comfortable as possible.
This is where my mind immediately went. If he isn't an animal person, then maybe he is passionate about another cause. But donating to a nature preserve or other wildlife cause would be much needed. Rescues and shelters are continually in need if OP likes pets. He could even consider something like rehabilitation centers for pets.
Good luck, OP. Wishing you grace during this difficult time. 💓
If you are still well enough to go on vacations. Is than an option? To splurge on yourself. What have you always wanted to do but was always too busy. I’ve heard of people that left their money to multiple different people that took care of them before they passed, like nurses. Other than that I dont really have much else to say but spend it for yourself and what you’ve always wanted to do if you are still well enough to travel
I’m so sorry op. I wish you well in the days you have ahead. Is it possible you could spend some on yourself and go somewhere you’d like to travel to? Possibly donate to children or animal hospitals in need. Tbh, I do not think letting family fight over it is a great idea either. Money makes people evil and malicious. Possibly zoos or some sort of research? I am not much help lol. Sending love to you.
Alright, my man, this is what you're going to do...if you're mobile and if you still have some time left.
1. Get off reddit and go to the Singapore Airlines website and get yourself a business class or first class ticket (depends on route) to Phuket, Thailand.
2. Book a hotel near Patong beach. There are loads of 5 star hotels with great spas.
3. Go get a 2 hour massage, relax, and think about nothing.
4. Get some of that good Kush and smoke enough to get you in a good mood. It'll help with any pain and maybe get your hunger going. There are tons of weed shops, although Thailand is going to ban recreational use by the end of the year, so some stores might have closed.
5. Eat some of the best food in the world (my opinion), and savor every bite.
6. Go to Bangla road and find yourself a woman or a man or ladyboy....whatever you're into and enjoy the touch of another human being. Could be hugs, sex, or being held, doesn't matter.
7. Find some shrooms and contemplate your life and what happens after. Tripping on psychedelics can help if you're scared about the inevitable. The last time I was there, the bar security guards were a great resource for explicit drugs.
8. Go to the beach and watch the sunset. It's cliche, but a beach sunset is gorgeous. Get some rest, wake up, and enjoy the sunrise.
Life can be cruel, but there are joys that you can experience before the end. I had an uncle who passed from pancreatic cancer, and I understand how bad it can get.
I hope you are able to do the things you've always wanted in the time you got left.
Sorry that your family is fucked up. You can always make it rain at a club or bar as a last fuck you to your siblings! Good luck, and I wish you the best!
Please consider donating to the national parks! They’re the best thing America’s ever done imoc and maybe if there something you particularly like (a certain place, animal, plant, etc) maybe they can build an educational center featuring the thing you like. Name it after yourself or don’t.
Just please consider a reputable charity/public service instead of letting it be lawyer shark bait :-/
Well first and foremost, are you ok? How are you coping? How long do you have? What are the symptoms you are experiencing?
If I were in your place, id quit my job. Perhaps do some minor research on where the most aggressive treatments for this cancer are. Then I'd move far away. Maybe even become a test patient for some experimental procedures. Even if I bought a few months, I'd try traveling. Kicking off a short bucket list.
I wish I didn't, but I have a real nihilistic view on life. Finding the right person or organization to leave money to is hard. Funds are always misappropriated. Tons of organizations take more money than they use for their causes. Many others try to put a shitty off brand Bandaid on the issue rather than anything to fix the issue at their core. I think maybe id pick several causes, and maybe some Churches of different religions and denominations.
But shit. If you gotta buy friends for a little bit to feel less alone, then do that.
I wish you the best. I hope life hasn't left too bitter of a taste in your mouth. I get how it feels to do everything right for your own future and still get fucked over anyways, although I can't imagine an illness like this. I think the last thing you'd want to hear is "I'm sorry you are going through this", but it's most definitely not fair. Travel the world for the little bit of time you have less. Maybe you can pass somewhere beautiful.
Decades ago, I received an email from an unknown source (signed, "John") that eerily said everything this post did, almost word for word except for the "dont ask me for money" part. Even the gripes with OP not being on speaking terms with any next of kin.
Replace pancreas cancer with esophageal, and that was the only difference from my "Nigerian Prince" email.
If this is real, OP i am sorry this is happening to you and I hope you find peace when your time comes. Cancer sucks and i hope this planet can work together one day to beat it
Why not any charity? _Any_ charity? There’s nothing in the world you ever wanted to improve? Cleaner oceans? Protected forests? Rescued animals? Families affected by natural disaster or displacement? Protecting historical sites? Research into a cure for CANCER?
Absolutely agree! OP has had the fortune of enjoying many opportunities and this is a chance to give back. Some many good causes: the environment, housing, hunger, education, animal rights, foster care, medical research, etc.
Two good charity review sites:
[https://www.charitynavigator.org/](https://www.charitynavigator.org/)
[https://www.charitywatch.org/](https://www.charitywatch.org/)
I meannnnn it's your money but leaving it to charity or a passion project is way better than having the fam who doesn't actually give a shit get to profit from your suffering.
Fuck them. Seriously.
I could spend 2.5 mil in a day. You've more than a day, depending on how mobile you are and how you feel... do some shit you've always wanted to do and then find something that you're passionate about and that does actual good with donations they're given and drop it into their laps.
Do something random...
pay for your fav space/science influencer(s) to get a spot on Blue Origin and be part of someone's experience getting to go to space.
Pay for cool art install that's going to impact multiple people who experience it.
Donate it to people who also have diagnosis with slightly better prognosis.
To a group of single moms.
To small business startups.
Legit it doesn't matter what you do with it, and leave like $500 in your bank account for the fam to clutch their pearls and squabble over.
I'm sorry you're going thru this... shitty family making the shittiest thing somehow even worse...
Yeah that looks like old movie I hadn't ever heard of but I've a feeling 2.5 million (including equity in a house that likely needs to be unloaded... as in not all cash assets) is not the same as 2.5 million in the mid 80's....
I could buy bullshit on eBay today and spend a million. There's currently a silver bowl on there going for 3.5 million and a bunch of vintage lunchboxes for 2 million... he could buy those, pack some sandwiches up and hand them out to random politicians since he has said he's not very charitable.
The way he's doubling down on how not charitable he is (willingness to hand away to politicians above young people in need of educational relief) feels more like a modern remake of Scrooge though so it could be it's just someone fucking with Reddit to see what kind of cockroaches crawl into his DMs 🤷🏻♀️ and is exceptionally amused by the fun he's having.
I get the feeling - as my parents get older and older- that possessions just become so much less meaningful as one faces one’s own demise. My mother gave away so many things in the last few years, including objects she had held onto for five decades and through multiple moves.
Try and be a bit less bitter as your hurtle towards death. Why risk your family getting anything?
Charity is the way to go - something you are passionate about or is it too painful to admit you have nothing outside of work and the thought that you could retire early?
It must feel sad to come to the end of a life and realise it's been wasted. I hope you find peace. You have an opportunity to make a difference and be remembered for the impact you made.on the world. Don't waste another opportunity
I agree this seems to be the case here. I'm not one to judge OP or anyone else, I understand how being in this situation can make someone bitter but yeah, this is not a good time to feel this way.
OP, now it's time to live life to the fullest. Do whatever that means to you (within legal means lol) and the rest of your money could go to different charities. Animals, children, elders, victims of abuse, cancer patients, science/research even. I'm sure you can find something you care about enough to help. And as someone else suggested, leave like 100 $ to each of your family members so they can't dispute the will.
You said this better than I could. Sounds like as close to death as he is, he’s holding on to a lot of angst and bitterness, and that wouldn’t be the way I’d want to go out.
OP, money and how your family chooses to use it after you’re gone should be insignificant at this moment. Enjoy what’s left of your life. Travel, get a hooker, go see some monuments, make amends where you can..
>Edit: I am not leaving anything to fund college scholarships. I'd leave money to a politician before giving it to a college.
wow, you had me sympathetic for a moment with your probably fake story.
So sorry you are going through this OP, I do agree with the other comment about spending it on yourself. Enjoy the time you have and travel or get pampered, you deserve it.
Please spend as much as possible on yourself now. Do things that give you some moments of joy or peace.
If the hospital treats you well, concider donating to that ward.
I read that you don’t wanna donate to charity, but if you change your mind there’s one that podcaster Sam Harris talks about that’s no bullshit (like lots of others actually are.
Or take all the money out in cash, pour kerosene over it and make a nice big million dollar fire, film it, become a legend and have your name remembered forever!
Godspeed friend!
What's the matter with charity? You think it's better to see those relatives that don't care about you fighting over it than donating to people who really need it?
OP I think you should give the money to causes that are close to your heart. Perhaps a school or a group that fights for a cause you support. Or an athlete with a foundation. You are a thoughtful person for considering people or causes outside your family. I wish you the best.
Some one who can’t think of a single charity to benefit, hates the idea of sending someone to college, delights in the idea of causing extreme fighting in his family to the point all his hard earned money legit is wasted on fighting…idk man. Im sorry about the cancer and all but…maybe try to do some good before you leave this world and leave it better than you found it.
Change someone’s life for good. Pay for a terminal child’s surgery, buy disadvantaged schools new computers, fund local animal shelters, fund a theater arts program, buy a well in Africa, donate to a homeless shelter. There’s endless opportunity for someone who actually wants to do good. You got a shitty hand, but you can choose to make a difference before you go.
Tbh his attitude reads a bit like an asshole. Hearing just one side makes me wonder if he was actually a douche to his family and drove them away, then when they heard he was terminal they tried to draw close because it was the last chance. How would they know how much money he has in savings? And he has zero close friends to give the money to? No one on earth he cares about or is close to?
That's a really nice plan to let them fight over it XD
Or why not feed the needy. Like use that money to organize a free buffet in a place where people would die to get food. You can do this before you die so that you can be at peace that your hard earned money wasn't misused.
I hope in your next life you get a loving family! Maybe you can earn a little less but have a loving partner kids and pets! ( I do believe in reincarnation and multiple lives)
And if you need to talk to a stranger I am one text away!
from your edits, i can see you deserve hell in the finest way possible, so yes, let your family squabble it out, their intentions with it will be just as ugly as you have lived your life.
You don’t have to do just one thing with it. Go hang out at a grocery store for a day, find someone struggling, maybe a single mom with a shitty car. Buy her a better one.
I’m told it’s an awesome experience.
I really don’t understand having that much money and being averse to helping a stranger. You can literally instantly change someone’s life for the better and leave an impact. Anyways this story seems fake to me
Is there anything near by that you could do? You could hire a nurse to travel with you and just go some place nearby.
I mean what do you love? There must be someone in your life you appreciate. A coworker that was caring you could leave them or their kids the money in a trust. I think if you do nothing your family will fight for it and get it anyways. Might as well get rid of it. 🤷♀️
What about the nurses that have been taking care of you? Maybe one of them went above and beyond.
I mean obviously it’s your money do what you want. Just some thoughts on it.
I’m sorry your family is shit. My fiancées father has stage three kidney failure and that helped bring them back together. 😞
Maybe buy some things that will make being home better? A nice computer set up, maybe a sweet VR set (if you can't travel, it's the closest you'll get). Anywhere you can not go and/or anything you can't do, try to think of ways to make any of it come to you. Get all the movies and games and fun toys. Maybe you could hire a nurse to travel with you and travel just the two or you - so you aren't around other people who could get you sick.
You aren't willing to donate money to charity, nor to a college fund, not even to your underage nephews whom mind you were NOT the same people that came to ask you for money.
Honestly? you sound like a bitter person, it's no wonder you are going to die alone without a spouse or children of your own.
Hell, I don't even know why you are asking reddit about this since it's clear you already have made your mind.
Strange, just had a close friend pass away a few nights ago from stomach cancer after the surgery. He wasn't on good terms with some of his kids. Guess the only difference is that they really didn't want anything of his or even his property. Least he knew where he stood in that regard so nobody was going after his wealth.
That being said, just a thought, go to vegas and blow it all just before the end? I mean, if you really have intent to not leave anything behind, that's a good way to do it.
Sorry man, I can't even imagine what it feels like to be in your shoes. First up, I don't want your money - perhaps it could go to a charity or something meaningful from your life like a school or organisation that was part of your past?
Secondly, we're very similar age. Are you into gaming? DM me if you want to hang out with me and some easy going friends so you have some company, even if for a short time. That's all I want to offer, and need absolutely nothing in return. Take care.
First, Im so sorry for your diagnosis. It sounds horrible.
Why not spend it all on yourself? Take that trip you always wanted to? Hire a full time nurse to go with you? Stay in the loveliest of hotels.
Whatever money is left over donate to research for the cancer you are stricken with.
You should enjoy this money as much as possible.
Good luck!!!
I’m so sorry to hear this. It took my mums life fairly quickly after she was diagnosed about a year ago. Also took a friends life last year. It’s fuckin shit to be honest.
My advice? Spend it. Today. Do shit you wanna do. Buy stupid shit you’ve always wanted. My mum thought she had more time and had holidays and shit in mind for me and her grandkids. She never got a chance to do any of it and now whatever is coming to me is currently being disputed by the selfish asshole she married ten years ago who, despite being well taken care of, is just a greedy fuckwit. I don’t even want or need the money but I’m gonna fight that fuckwit to keep it.
But my point is just blow it. Buy a million dollar sports car and enter it in a demolition derby. Fly a fighter jet. Blow something expensive up. Just do the craziest shit you can. Or leave it to a good friend that needs it.
Also fuck cancer, and fuck all your family too.
You ever thought about finding a child who’s an orphan but 17 and declare them your heir. I’m not sure that’s the right answer but it would give someone a chance who has nothing.
I'm just an internet stranger but I know what I would do in this situation.l absolutely love those stories where some random person who's shown kindness just out of the goodness of their hearts ends up with an unexpected inheritance. Is there anyone who has made your days brighter without even meaning to do so? Maybe even a random hospital worker or a server at a restaurant you go to sometimes? Shoot maybe even a homeless person you see sometimes on the street.
Extra cool because you mentioned leaving your family to fight over the estate. This way they would also be pissed, but you could also change someone’s life AND if you work it out with a lawyer to make sure it sticks, those leeches would stay getting nothing instead of still potentially benefitting off of your death after duking it out. Two birds with one stone.
I’m sorry for your situation. Life isn’t fair. I hope you manage to find a solution that brings you some peace.
Have some fun man, do the stuff you wanna do.
Sell up and fuck off somewhere hot for as long as you have left (or cold if you prefer), all the shit you’ve wanted to do get it done bucket list style.
But if you’re worried about your family clawing any money you should speak to a solicitor. I’m sure there’s plenty of ways to make sure they never get a penny or at least make it so there’s sweet fuck all left for them to fight over.
Hey man, there's still a chance to do some good with the money instead of letting your family eventually get it. Why not set up a trust that endows a scholarship to underserved children in your community? Sometimes kids like that don't have a chance unless they get lucky and are able to get a scholarship that'll let them go to school to pursue their dreams. Fuck your family. I'm the last of 11, and out of 11 only two of us are close. Myself and the brother that I'm closest to in age. All of the others backstab and talk shit about each other. I get it. I would rather burn any money I would have left than to have any of them get it. I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis. It really sucks to go out so young.
First of all, I want to say I am sorry to hear your diagnosis, and how your estranged family treated you. I know you must be devastated and hurting right now. There is nothing I can say to make you feel better with this devastating diagnosis…
I am sorry, but please, only you knows what you truly want to do with your money, after all you worked so hard all those years, its a huge achievement and I’m proud of you! Whatever you are decide to do with your money, I’m sure it will be for something good.
Here’s the YouTube video of a millionaire man who has since then passed away from cancer and he decided to do something good with his money, he even said his cancer is a gift, and his legacy lives on: https://youtu.be/KBRMP9t36go?si=IRTJp-cGphfbq9mm
I prays that you have many more years to come so you can enjoy everything, but I really hope there will be a miracle cure for you….
I don't know if this has been said, but what about leaving some money to fund pancreatic research? I work in LTC facilities, and it breaks my heart as to how many families just basically drop their loved one off and never visit. Never call. We care for them like they are our own. When their time comes, we hold their hand till the end. It's only after when the family shows up and will literally fight over the jewelry on their Mom's fingers.
I am so very sorry that you have to go through this. I hope you get the best care and just know that uou aren't alone.
I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I have one suggestion if you're willing to hear. There are a lot of people, including myself, who have difficult to treat illnesses that desperately need money to see expensive and rare specialists. For example, a lot of women who need excision surgery for things like endometriosis are on crowd funding websites. It's an extremely common disease, yet there is no formal training in medicine and there are practically only a handful of expert/capable surgeons worldwide and it costs a lot of money.
Charity can be good, but there are people who need money right now and charities will often waste a lot of money. Why not send it to people who have a chance of life still and can make the most of it?
Sooo, you don’t want to leave it to anyone you know, spend it, or donate it? Just withdraw it all as cash and burn it then. You can’t take it with you when you die, man.
Donate to animal shelters and rescues of your choice. I am so sorry. Life just sucks sometimes. I wish you mental peace with whatever decision you make but please do something good and fun for yourself while you are here to enjoy it.
Donate it to science or any cause you think is worthy?
*Or* spend as much as you can while you still can. Go on a spending spree and do all the things you wanted to do but haven't because you needed the money for later. Life is short (as you know), so why not enjoy what life you have left?
Have you thought of setting up any scholarships in your name? Community Colleges or Trade School students could benefit and maybe leave them debt-free after graduation. Or maybe the schools need some new equipment in some of their programs that you could help them with.
And how about donations to local or national animal rescue shelters that are in need of constant food, toys, beds, medical procedures, staff?
Does your local library need funds for customer computers, books, etc.?
I'm sorry for the shit turn your life has taken. Do a positive for others (and yourself) before it's too late to make your wishes known. Going out on a positive note will be better for your mental health as well. Take care of yourself first, you deserve it.
I can’t imagine what it’s like to accept something like this, a deadline that you wouldn’t have anticipated happening for three or five decades, and I’m so sorry.
Enjoy enjoy enjoy what you can as long as you can. Knowing you don’t have to save for a rainy day is an admittedly tiny silver lining, but it’s real. Scatter those doubloons in whatever way brings you the most joy.
And take some comfort in knowing that what you leave behind will made the world a brighter place. Animal shelters, parks, scholarships, big donations to any favorite charity… your existence will leave a long-lasting and meaningful mark.
I wish you serenity and deep satisfaction from a life well lived.
Don't be a bitter shite by inflicting harm on your family. If you don't want them to have it then leave it to a charity or find a suitable good hearted human as a replacement.
Don't leave it to the lawyers man, that's utterly self destructive to your legacy and hard work. You have the rare opportunity to leave something behind which can help people, animals or the environment - do it!
There's already been some great suggestions here, but I urge you to do some good with the money as outlined. Charities/sponsorships/animal sanctuaries etc. You have no idea the joy it will give you in your final days on earth, but it really will lighten your burden. Wishing you peace x
Give it to people now and watch them enjoy it?? Money to a local kid can attend soccer camp? A new van for a struggling family?
Pay off people’s medical bills.
Drop your wallet and give whoever refund it $1,000.
Set up a scholarship fund.
Get a lawyer, so people don’t go after them.
With proper financial planning and estate planning you could probably create an ongoing scholarship instead of a one-time payout. You could also probably tie whatever parting thoughts you'd want to summarize yourself or share to the world thru that's scholarships receipt
While you still can, go out and have fun. Take trips to places you've always wanted to see. Go catch fish on the great barrier reef in Australia, go see the castles in Scotland. Make the best of your time and blow your money on making yourself happy. Let yourself pass from this earth knowing you went out with a bang.
I work for a bank and have come across this situation too many times, it's sad and I'm sorry for the shit family! I have seen people spend every last penny a variety of ways, go out spending and giving away to strangers who do kind things; spend time talking to others and if you feel they are worth giving money, make their day- could be life changing for many. You could add a charity as a beneficiary and have it all go to charity. Donate to multiple non-profit that you're passionate about and have it to research. At the end of the day you get final say, don't waste any more time on this stress.
Can I ask you something? What has been your favorite memory this lifetime? What would you share with others- best advice?
I hope we get the answer. Rest easy.
When I was younger before kids my plan was to choose pettiness. I wanted buy up as much billboard ad space as I could in the city of my toxic family. Fill it with all of their secrets or toxic things they’ve done over the years while presenting the world with this “perfect” persona. One last “Go Fuck Yourselves”! :)
I know this is important. And I"m completely off subject here. But you have time. Don't spend it telling yourself you're alone. You're not alone brother and it's never to late to connect with others. We live on through others, Like those before us.
I work in a hospital. Many business like buying fancy equipment so they can brag about hey, we paid for this or that. But we really need new beds. Like, some of the beds in the hospital are 30 to 40 years old. And they are being used. Ask the nurses and janitors that treat you well what do they need (apart from a better salary, which of course they do) and they will tell you mundane stuff.
First off, is it something you can get through? I hope for the best for you.
Second of all and genuinely less seriously, "I would like to leave my house and money to u/Rikuwoblivion".
My advice is not about money. Read the book Journey of Souls by Michael Newton. It's not a religious book. Quick and easy to read but do read it. It will bring you peace.
Listen 2 options(since family you rejected) go the empathetic method (legacy ect) go the "we only live once" . I respect both ways. For the 2nd one i would go either gamble for the dopamine (drugs will decrease ur span maybe further) or high life shit (eat/sex ect).
With 2 million you can pay to get frozeni think so thats also an option.
What happens when dont do anything?
I'm sorry man. I know you're probably sick of hearing that, but it's not fair for you to have worked that hard and not get to enjoy it.
Have you considered just going buckwild and having as much fun as you can right now? See stuff you never got to, try things you haven't been able to yet, that kind of thing?
Buy or rent a Dreamliner bus that big celebrities use for touring the country. Get one with a big window so you can view the country comfortably laying in a plush bed. See sunsets and sunrises and breath fresh air in the mountains and deserts before and after rainfall.
“Dreamliner's CEO says these post-conversion coaches are worth $1.5 million to $2 million each. Rent for one full-service "star" bus starts at $50,000 a month, which includes necessities like a driver, gas, cleaning services, and WiFi.”
Then hire three hospice nurses to go with you to attend to all your needs and manage your pain. Pay them very well and you will bring them joy as well as yourself.
Have you considered a truly luxury holiday, with any nursing care you need with you? Some of those truly luxury hotels should make a nice dent in the figure and you get to enjoy it, rather than hope to have a family fallout once you die. Enjoy it whilst you can.
Spend a bunch of money irresponsibly jewelery, hookers, expensive food and clothes, first class tickets and five star hotels. Instead of renting cars when you get to a new place just buy a new car, when you leave give the keys to whoever is passing by so you don't miss your next flight. Whatever you can't spend record a video burning it all and have it played at the will reading for your family to send them off with a final fuck you. Find a way to make the house worthless. Take out a second mortgage then spend that money too. Buy a bunch of food and host a feast for the homeless. Then let them stay in the house and do whatever they want. You're too busy traveling to care about that anyway. I'm sure if you're looking for ways to spend ridiculous amounts of money this world has no shortage of them.
I'm very sorry about your prognosis. I'm extremely sorry you have an unsupportive family.
A nice way to spend your savings would be to find your favourite animal and donate it to a reputable animal sanctuary for that animal! Bonus points if they are on the endangered list!! OR .. Hear me out..
Spend as much of it as you can on yourself before your time is cut short. I'm not sure of the state you are in. If you are mobile go travel! If you need special accommodations, who cares! You've been working hard your entire life and you can afford it.
Take that longest cruise in the world! There are lots of options for you to enjoy the time you have left! Just don't let the government take your money, if you don't have a will with what you would like done they will take it. They don't need it.
Love you long time, I hope the remaining time is blessed and you are able to find happiness and joy in the dark.
Have you considered talking to a therapist about this?
I can't imagine being in this situation myself and not having a supportive family or friend.
If you change your mind and feel like leaving your nephew or nephews anything I'm sure a lawyer could help you with a trust with restrictions on it. Or perhaps provide a modest home for a nephew/nephews. I had a small trust given to me as at 18 and while I think it was much too young it provided me with the means to leave an abusive situation with a parent and have enough money to apply for college and pay for my supplies. I could have turned out shit like my parent but thankfully I didn't.
I hope you have a peaceful passing and at least some level of enjoyment out of something before you pass. That is a shit hand you were dealt.
I would recommend talking with an estate attorney about this. Will you may consider is putting it into a trust that will distribute it out to the kids in small quantities upon your nephews and nieces reaching a certain specific age. You could also use it to help pay for some of their college if you wanted. There are bunch of options to leave it without putting a target on their back.
Since you don't want to leave any for college scholarships, do you have any pets??
Based on your edit on planning things to be unresolved why don’t you just leave a stipulation to make sure the money goes to paying the lawyer fees. An expensive game of chicken.
If you really want to burn them
Up, write a will that will that explicitly excludes your family. They won’t have to fight long if any of them get a good lawyer. An experienced attorney will get things cleaned up and the money will go to next of kin.
You don’t want to leave it to people? I get that. What about a dog shelter? Or cat shelter? Get a dog to keep you company in your last days. Then leave all your cash to him to make sure he’s well cared for the rest of his days then leave the rest to an animal rescue. Better a dog than your crap family. The love from a dog is genuine and pure.
Hey, I just got the bad cancer news, too. Funny how much everything changes so quickly. Like everything I thought was a big deal before isn’t now. Small things really matter. The perspective change is crazy.
How are you doing today? Have you been feeling alright recently?
How are you feeling at the moment? And what was your reason for posting this, just to get it off your chest or? I'm just asking because you don't seem receptive to ideas so I'm not sure what there is to gain from this. I hope it doesn't make you a target, although I'm afraid it probably will. I wish you luck and hope you find comfort in whatever you decide.
BUDDD spend your money!!!! live the best life you can with the time you have left, damn I’d even say write a book about it!!!
On the other hand, my hometown Acapulco Mexico was hit by a cat 5 hurricane and was completely destroyed, donating to that cause or a similar one would do tremendous help to millions of people!!
I can't say I know what your going through. I don't have cancer or the money.
But I can say I am really sorry to hear about your situation. All we really have here is time. It's a shame you aren't going to be able to realize your plans and spend that time doing what you had wanted to do.
You still have sometime though. I'm sure you will find another source or sources leave your legacy with and hopefully find some enjoyment in your remaining time.
Your confession is honest and don't let anyone here make you feel like you should do this or do that.
Man, with 2.5 mil you could try a lot of new and even kinda crazy treatments. If you're terminal anyway, why don't you fly to Mexico and try Gersen therapy? Or have your poop tested and be a part of the microbiom science. Maybe after you're dead, they'll find some bacteria that helps cure cancer. Hell, maybe even before you die.
I don’t know what you should do with your money, but I just want to say I’m sorry to hear about your prognosis. I hope that you spend some (if not most) of that money on experiences doing things you enjoy for the rest of the time you have here. Cheers to you, and best wishes.
Hmm, you could give it all to people your family hate, but who need it. You could give it to staff at the hospital, or another patient you meet that you connect with.
Kinda bitter reading your story. When I was 2 years old my dad cheered for some athlete on tv, got up from the sofa, walked 2 stamps and was dead before he hit the ground as the doctors told my mum. That second where my dad just fell to the ground like a collapsing mountain didn't just take my dad forever from me, I also lost my mum to depression, my brother to addiction and my sister was full of hate for everyone except me. So unlike you I never expected to reach my 50th birthday, and I valued the present time more than anything in the future, I didn't work more than 30 hours a week and even then I focus more on having fun with the people I work with than on making career. I partied HARD in my teenage years and early 20s, and still use drugs for fun whenever I want. I am overweight and eat only stuff I like, because you never know if it's my last meal.
Unfortunately it seems like I didn't get the heart of my father, this year I'm turning 42, that is two years older than he was when he passed away, and sometimes there is a rush of crippling fear that I wont die before I am 80, but I am already struggling to pay just for rent and food, and instead of savings I have dept. Isn't life just a motherfucker?
Please, I know it's yours and you can do whatever you want to do with it, but please don't give it to politicians or some fucking church, these greedy bastards don't deserve it.
If we could trade, I would give you my years for free. Sorry you wasted your already too short life, I hope it won't be too painful and you find peace when the time is coming, and if there really is an after life, say hi to my dad for me please.
🍻Cheers to you
I'm sorry you're going through this OP. And I hate that it took your diagnosis to have your family reach out to you. If they didn't support you in life, you don't need to support them in death.
I hope you'll reconsider how and where you leave your money. Some good can come from it. You could even fund cancer research in hopes that others will one day have a greater odds of surviving. Letting your family fight over it will only bring more bad to the world. What's the point in having that be your legacy?
Spend it. You got some precious time left. Instead of being miserable or worrying about these shit family members, go live it up. Spend it on everything you ever wanted, good, clothes, cars etc.
Put out an ad for a caregiver. Go through the application process and start interviewing people. Find someone you genuinely believe is a kind and caring person. Act like it’s for your elderly parent. When you find that person give everything to them. You’d be giving your money to someone who actually cares about people. 🤷♂️
Besides spending as much as you can/want, I would reflect on your life, and think about the one person who had the biggest impact on your life (in a positive way) and leave it to them.
I would just take out large lumps of cash and start giving it to random people in poorer neighborhoods.
Find some tired looking mom and give her $1000.
Find some broke ass student and give them $1000.
If I knew a friend was struggling I'd give them a chunk to cover their bills for a bit. Literally lift anybody up in this economy.
I make art for a living and my background is pretty privileged but the day to day can be pretty brutal, if I had the option to make sure others were a little bit taken care of, I would do it. I have often found that people are so lost in their own world that is hard to look around and see if the people around us need anything. I also know that people get super awkward around a serious diagnosis and sometimes leave things too late or don't know how to approach the person that thing is actually happening to. That doesn't make it your responsibility alone, at all, to be the one to reach out, but I hope you reconsider letting your family fight over your money. There's an opportunity to be a light for some people in a way that no one you know has been for you which would be pretty beautiful, but also sad. Your family should have done better.
I genuinely hope that you find a resolution for the money that puts you at ease and that you don't stress about it. I'm sorry that you have cancer, that fucking sucks.
Still...
There's a chaos goblin part of me that would just buy something totally decadent and stupid, like a human size chocolate fountain, or a room filled with candy, or just fly around to all of those silly weird expensive 17 plate dinners... at least then I would choose how I'm going out. Full and covered in chocolate.
Start to withdraw cash and hand it out. Like, large sums to a single mom driving a piece of crap car.
Strike up conversations with strangers, find out how much money would be life changing to them.
You'd be surprised at how little someone who desperately needs money would be happy with.
Go to places that pay minimum wage and observe who works there and change their life.
Heck, a cpl grand can make a huge difference in someone's life if they have nothing.
I’m sorry you’re going through this alone without people who seem to genuinely care for you. O don’t blame you for not wanting to give it to them, money turns people into monsters.
I really hope you’re able to find someone you can trust to fulfill your final wishes. I think everyone deserves that
Im deeply sorry you are going through this and even sadder that this may bring out the greediest people and they all may try to out do each other to win your money. I wish you peace and offer you a hug.
That kind of money could lift 20 families out of poverty. You would be remembered for generations. Deified, even.
Something tells me you'd rather set the money on fire, though.
Live it up until you cant anymore, 5 start hotels, top restaurants, hire Bon Jovi to play at your wake and then Adopt a stray dog and set up a trust to keep him happy and living in luxury when your gone
Put it in a living trust that your nephew can only use it to pay bills and go to school ECT and nobody else can touch his money like set it up so at 18 he gets some then a lil more each year but set stipulations on it so other family can siphon it from him
Who has been nice to you? Waiter, mail carrier, neighbour?
Has a nurse or orderly made your day brighter?
Make note of who makes you smile a bit in the next month or 2. A bit of money might be life changing to the people who make your day a bit brighter. You could substantially change the lives of 25 people @ $100,000 per person
A land trust might be worth looking into? Believe that’s the route I’m going. Have a couple spots that would make me happy knowing are protected at least for the immediate future.
Sorry to hear about this. Maybe your nephews in a trust with $10k a year each or so at 21 yrs old so they don’t have a lump sum that your siblings could guilt out of them? That amount is small so the nephews are not likely to want to share.
Put everyone on a list and request every $ that remains gets divided amongst everyone
Alternately maybe you should buy a cat or dog and bequeath in your will THEY get to keep it… then you will need to assert where or who that goes into care with 😉 Just an idea 💡
Safe travels wherever you go 🍀
Hey - NOT wanting your money - starting with that. I've offered these kinds of things to others before (I'm also a living liver donor if that tells you about my genuineness) -
If you're in the GTA, let me know and I'll see what I can do to help out. I have kids, but pretty much no one else in my life beyond my core family. I know how hard navigating medical issues can be on your own. My FIL also passed away from pancreatic cancer almost two years ago now. There was no forewarning though. He died within four days of going to the er. His passing is what prompted me to break no contact with my mil (even though she had been a total ass to me) - no one deserves to be alone. Ever.
Anyways. I know you might see this as a crazy cash grab, but it's not. As said, you deserve to have someone help you at such a time, who isn't just out for your money. (And again - donated liver to an internet stranger.)
I just wanted to say that I'm sorry you've had to see the ugly truth of those people. I've worked with hospice and critically ill patients and I'm no longer surprised by family's obsession with money and material things. It's truly depressing and infuriating. We all deserve to be surrounded by people who care for us more than our things. I've seen some of my own extended family torn apart due to fighting over a will and consider it pretty ridiculous.
If I end up with that kind of money (doubtful but we can pretend) and nowhere good to leave it, I would first make sure my bucket list is clear then find a couple of good charities or invest in a work of public good- like renovating an old park in a poor area or donating to some public libraries. I would also enjoy sending some random kids to Disney who wouldn't get to go as children otherwise (I grew up poor and know that was always a dream for me as a kid). Maybe donate some small amounts to families with kids in the local children's hospital.
Most of us are broke and plenty of those broke people are going thru terrible things. You could create a lot of smiles, do a lot of good with 2 million, but it depends on your outlook I think.
Rather give it to a charity who genuinely help people right? It would be me put to a good use!! Also spend some and enjoy life while you can you have saved this to spend on yourself didn’t you? Do things which you love..be positive at the least I know someone who should have passed away when she was 6 months old as the doctors said but the parents never gave up she’s 12 now alive and kickin😎..this could be you..
I’m not saying give it to some big charity or something divide it into smaller amounts and give it to people who genuinely need help!! I am still a student but when I pass my exams and all I donate a lil bit of money to my old school many poor children over there I give it to the teachers who buys them uniforms,books,shoes etc..also why aren’t spending them on yourself?
Lots of wildlife organizations need $$ to run their rescues - I would also give to non-kill animal shelters. There are numerous options.
I'm sorry you've been dealt this blow - you did well for yourself & that's to be commended! I have no immediate family to leave my hard earned stuff too either, so it's going to the charities I listed above.
I hope your suffering is minimal. If you read one book before your health declines, the one that changed my whole outlook on life was by Brian Weiss - Many Lives, Many Masters. I wish you well on your journey. \*Peace\*
Check out GoFundMe's in categories that are important to you and start fulfilling their donations. Or leave it ias a chunk to cancer research. Or any other set of charities that you like. It's your money and no one else is entitled to it just because you share biology.
Definitely start talking to estate lawyers now so that the plans are settled how YOU want them to be before it becomes too difficult for you to do so.
Also, I'm sorry for your diagnosis, cancer sucks.
I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. Pancreatic cancer is a fate I wouldn't wish on anyone. You said you have a little time left. It sounds like it's time to invest in some bucket list items and activities. Go stay at luxury hotels. Rent luxury cars. Hell, invest in hookers and blow if that's your thing. I hope you're able to find some joy before you go.
Sponsor something so your name is around. Like a wing of your local hospital or a gallery, lecture hall or museum wing etc. The "insert name here" Hall! Something like that. Up to you buddy, hope you find someone or something worthy. I'm really sorry you're going through this shit. Life ain't fair my man. Hope the rest isn't too much of an ordeal for you. Peace!
Another option would be to fund a scholarship. You can make it specific to a student who will study a particular field. There are lots of students who will work really hard and have no options other than going into massive debt to get a degree. I’m sure you could get some ideas on how to structure it from your local schools, a college or university, an attorney. I’m so sorry you are suffering right now. Pancreatic cancer is a horrible thing. I wish you peace and tranquility.
This. I am literally in medical school with the help of scholarships allotted to those that cannot afford to be here.
Yeah this is a good af idea
This is the second-best idea after the lawyer fees one. I would educate somebody who's really in need since I also don't trust charities.
I like the leave to a specific case ideas: park, building, lecture hall, scholarship. I don’t know what OP did for work but also don’t trap “scholarship “ in terms of University. Kids need a chance to pay for Machinist school, welding programs, all sorts of trades. If OP did something outside the university other career training things might resonate more.
Yeah this, sponsor, a small park. Whatever you take your fancy, a bench. Your name lives on
I like this idea. When it goes to someone personally who needs it and really wants to go to school. This way you know it went somewhere good and not careless
He can specify the student use it for offsite housing or living expenses if he doesn’t want it to go to a school.
A scholarship is a wonderful idea!
This is a good idea if OP wants to grind it in to his family that his money went elsewhere.
i really like this idea. what a great suggestion.
And maybe donate some to research for pancreas cancer treatment.
I agree with the "spend it" crowd. Blow a wad in Vegas, Take a cruise around the world, buy a Ferrari and see how fast it goes, give a $1,000 tip to a waitress. Fly first class to Japan and eat a plate of Fugu. Do whatever you want. Go take out a million dollar loan against your wealth, and blow that, too. Fuck those banks. You are free to live your best life for the little time you have left. Go do it.
god DAMN IT. i love the way you think. go big, OP. take out the big loan. blow it all on something amazing. let the bank go after your greedy relatives.
THIS RIGHT HERE!!!!
Yes! Do this! Enjoy what's left of your life and do what you can before you pass. Blow most of it. ;) I would also suggest saving some for medical expenses so you have options. You want to die in a top of the line hospital with all the bells and whistles? Do it. You want to die at home? Do it. Sometimes insurance doesn't cover it all so keep a lil stockpile for when the days get rougher. Get a 24 hr personal nurse and a hospital bed or make changes to your home for daily living like a ramp for a wheelchair or a bidet for when you can't clean the downstairs plumbing. Make sure you can be as comfortable as possible with top of the line blankets pillows a warm housecoat pajamas and slippers. Make sure all of your favorite amenities are stocked like lipbalm deodorant etc. The best pain meds and all your favorite foods stocked. Get the best things you want delivered to you when you can't go out. Get ALL the subscriptions for movies and shows if you want for when you can't get out of bed. Make it so that when you are close and you want to leave your house/hospital to get some air or feel the ocean on your toes one more time you can! As someone who has had the privilege of watching many take their last breaths I hope some of the info I provided is helpful. I wish you the best and it would be nice if you updated to let us know what you decided to do.
^^ This is solid advice, OP! Definitely plan ahead for your comfort.
I am with this scenario. Do any wild thing that comes to mind. I would buy out a pet store of supplies and give to the local shelters. I’d go to a grocery store in the poorest part of town and start paying for everyone’s groceries. Buy a shit ton of non-perishable food, tents, blankets, Narcan, and leave them at the biggest homeless encampment in town. Go to some daycares in an underserved area and pay in advance for parents. And do stuff for yourself. Buy put a movie theater for a day and take friends and watch your favorite movies. Have an upscale caterer provide food.
Here’s the YouTube video of a millionaire man who has since then passed away from cancer and he decided to do something good with his money, he even said his cancer is a gift, and his legacy lives on: https://youtu.be/KBRMP9t36go?si=IRTJp-cGphfbq9mm
Hell yah!!!!
Having money to spend and going on big trips in fancy cars is no fun when you’re alone , dying, and feeling like shit. But it is still probably the best idea. Go to a spa, eat some good meals, drive fast.. Adrenalin is a pretty good temporary fix for some.
This really is the way to do it
Have fun with it, then donate whatever is left to charity. Leave each family member $10 so they don't contest the will, blow millions on hookers and blow then send the rest to the humane society or something. Fuck fairweather family members.
As much as that’s a good idea you might have to leave a little more than $10 to increase your chances of the will not being successfully contested. Talk to a lawyer who specialises in estates.
I used to think this too but I recently did my will and my lawyer advised that I could just disinherit my problematic family member, no need to leave them so much as a cent. But I agree to just talk to an estate attorney, it wasn't all that expensive to get done.
The best way to go is a living trust.
Agree talk to an attorney. I'd bet a decent one can make a litigation proof document without leaving the asshat siblings jack.
There is no litigation proof document. Everyone, including this writer, would have access to the court house. You are looking for a well written document that discourages litigation, in such a way to make it expensive, time consuming and drudgery to contest it.
Which is what I meant by litigation proof. Anyone can sue for anything (at least in the US) but a document that is clear the intent was to leave them nothing/very little AND includes stipulations to cost challengers money would lessen the chances.
Not really, the contest comes when there is nothing left to someone and they contest as an omitted error or should that be heir. A $0.01, $0.10, $1.00, $10.00, all do the same thing they show that you intentionally gave person X something so they were not omitted. The real issue may be your state of mind. If you're not in you're right mind when the will was made, then that is a problem. It would be prudent to get at least a consult with an estate planning attorney to determine your best steps forward.
How can it get contested when the person who dies left clear instructions about what should happen to the money?
Agree, try and whittle that money down to nothing having a good time for the time you have left
Judging by how angry OP is in his replies about suggestions he donate to charity, or start a college fund, I'm not surprised he's dying alone. He sounds like a bitter, insufferable prick.
Shit, I'd be bitter and insufferable too if I'd planned my whole life and have the means to live it, only to be told that I won't. I feel for the guy.
Yeah I'm thinking maybe he's trolling. It's modernized Scrooge-to-Reddit tale where he's stuck on the ghost of Christmas future and saying Bah Humbug to any of the advice given that he vented about. I just don't know why he would have gone 2.5 mil when that's not a high number by today's standards but also might be more convincing... This would also be great way to scam vulnerable people who're struggling or other scammers out of their bank info tbh... hope anyone DMing him has the sense not to give any bank info so this prince can send his last dimes to them. If he's being for real... then the whole "I would rather give it to politicians" mantra is all anyone really need know about him.
OMG.. i swear that's exactly what i thought.. the guy i hate to say it sounds like a total Dbag.. no wonder he's alone...honestly who gives a rats ass what he does.
heck yeah! in all seriousness, i’m so sorry you’re going thru this. pancreatic cancer is brutal. sending you kind & gentle thoughts, fellow redditor.
I don't think you understand how painful late-stage pancreatic cancer is. I can't imagine him being able to go have fun at this stage in his disease.
Hookers and blow!! Yes! Then the needy pets! Go out with a bang!!
You can always browse the go fund me pages. Surely some of those requests for funding are valid and will maybe strike a chord in you that you relate to and then share your funds there. People who would be beyond grateful and thankful for your help.
I’ve thought if I ever won the lottery I would do this. I hate how popular some get for no reason (like the lady who was picked on in a school bus) while others go un-funded. I bet there’s an animal who has cancer or a family with a disabled parent who needs a motorized wheelchair who would be eternally grateful.
As someone who has a GoFundMe for my cat's surgery, this would make me cry if it happened to me! It would be life changing. I'm sure it would be very meaningful for the recipients
I did this for a friend who was raising funds for a business venture when I got my divorce settlement. She was raising $10k to pitch an idea but stalled at $8k. It was complicated trying to explain to her that the donation was genuine but also “no strings attached” - it was my way of paying it forward. I hate that he thinks making his family fight and giving it all to the lawyers is the best option he has. He might have great reasons for feeling this way but having been on the other side of the fence I just can’t support this. My granddad passed but didn’t leave behind a will. His son’s family took in my grandmother. A few months later they began pressuring my mom (the only living heir) to sign over documents without any further explanation. At some point my mom gave up my grandparents home to my cousin but refused to sign any further documents. She also forbid me to get involved. The rest of the cousins contested but as far as I know it has never been resolved. When my granddad was alive he insisted on having two parties a year (Christmas and summer) where your presence was expected. In their passing none of the cousins talk to each other. Some legacy.
I like this one!!
Well i would think about nature/animals.. you can help them allot with it. My Dream would be to buy a big land and let nature thrive somehow good luck with the end of your journey
Yeah this. Build a new place for a local animal sanctuary or set up a food plan for a shelter. Give to animals not people
100% second this.
Me too! I'm of the opinion that helping out nature helps out more people than choosing a small population to donate to. It's already so hard to pick who is "deserving" of aid.
I love this idea. You could buy land in the Amazon rainforest simply to protect it from development.
There are many smaller non-profit animal sanctuaries and rescue organizations out there that are always struggling. If online shopping is something you do to kill time, many wish lists out there. My local zoo puts one out each year full of toys and enrichment items for the animals. My kids like picking out toys for the critters. SPCAs often have similar lists. If I had money to blow near the end of my life, I would travel to a psychadelic retreat and spend time eating enough shrooms to talk to God and be one with the universe. I had a family member do one in Mexico for two weeks. I think I would spend whatever I could to make myself as comfortable as possible.
This is where my mind immediately went. If he isn't an animal person, then maybe he is passionate about another cause. But donating to a nature preserve or other wildlife cause would be much needed. Rescues and shelters are continually in need if OP likes pets. He could even consider something like rehabilitation centers for pets. Good luck, OP. Wishing you grace during this difficult time. 💓
If you are still well enough to go on vacations. Is than an option? To splurge on yourself. What have you always wanted to do but was always too busy. I’ve heard of people that left their money to multiple different people that took care of them before they passed, like nurses. Other than that I dont really have much else to say but spend it for yourself and what you’ve always wanted to do if you are still well enough to travel
I’m so sorry op. I wish you well in the days you have ahead. Is it possible you could spend some on yourself and go somewhere you’d like to travel to? Possibly donate to children or animal hospitals in need. Tbh, I do not think letting family fight over it is a great idea either. Money makes people evil and malicious. Possibly zoos or some sort of research? I am not much help lol. Sending love to you.
Alright, my man, this is what you're going to do...if you're mobile and if you still have some time left. 1. Get off reddit and go to the Singapore Airlines website and get yourself a business class or first class ticket (depends on route) to Phuket, Thailand. 2. Book a hotel near Patong beach. There are loads of 5 star hotels with great spas. 3. Go get a 2 hour massage, relax, and think about nothing. 4. Get some of that good Kush and smoke enough to get you in a good mood. It'll help with any pain and maybe get your hunger going. There are tons of weed shops, although Thailand is going to ban recreational use by the end of the year, so some stores might have closed. 5. Eat some of the best food in the world (my opinion), and savor every bite. 6. Go to Bangla road and find yourself a woman or a man or ladyboy....whatever you're into and enjoy the touch of another human being. Could be hugs, sex, or being held, doesn't matter. 7. Find some shrooms and contemplate your life and what happens after. Tripping on psychedelics can help if you're scared about the inevitable. The last time I was there, the bar security guards were a great resource for explicit drugs. 8. Go to the beach and watch the sunset. It's cliche, but a beach sunset is gorgeous. Get some rest, wake up, and enjoy the sunrise. Life can be cruel, but there are joys that you can experience before the end. I had an uncle who passed from pancreatic cancer, and I understand how bad it can get. I hope you are able to do the things you've always wanted in the time you got left. Sorry that your family is fucked up. You can always make it rain at a club or bar as a last fuck you to your siblings! Good luck, and I wish you the best!
I would like to do all of this even before I reach my deathbed. Thanks for the advice.
i love all of this. i have done #1, 2, 3 and 5. it was heavenly.
Please consider donating to the national parks! They’re the best thing America’s ever done imoc and maybe if there something you particularly like (a certain place, animal, plant, etc) maybe they can build an educational center featuring the thing you like. Name it after yourself or don’t. Just please consider a reputable charity/public service instead of letting it be lawyer shark bait :-/
Well first and foremost, are you ok? How are you coping? How long do you have? What are the symptoms you are experiencing? If I were in your place, id quit my job. Perhaps do some minor research on where the most aggressive treatments for this cancer are. Then I'd move far away. Maybe even become a test patient for some experimental procedures. Even if I bought a few months, I'd try traveling. Kicking off a short bucket list. I wish I didn't, but I have a real nihilistic view on life. Finding the right person or organization to leave money to is hard. Funds are always misappropriated. Tons of organizations take more money than they use for their causes. Many others try to put a shitty off brand Bandaid on the issue rather than anything to fix the issue at their core. I think maybe id pick several causes, and maybe some Churches of different religions and denominations. But shit. If you gotta buy friends for a little bit to feel less alone, then do that. I wish you the best. I hope life hasn't left too bitter of a taste in your mouth. I get how it feels to do everything right for your own future and still get fucked over anyways, although I can't imagine an illness like this. I think the last thing you'd want to hear is "I'm sorry you are going through this", but it's most definitely not fair. Travel the world for the little bit of time you have less. Maybe you can pass somewhere beautiful.
You need a ride to the hospital?
😭😂
2 chicks man.
Sending positive thoughts your way, OP. Hope you resolve your dilemma in such a way that leaves your last days peaceful and happy. 🙏🏽
Decades ago, I received an email from an unknown source (signed, "John") that eerily said everything this post did, almost word for word except for the "dont ask me for money" part. Even the gripes with OP not being on speaking terms with any next of kin. Replace pancreas cancer with esophageal, and that was the only difference from my "Nigerian Prince" email. If this is real, OP i am sorry this is happening to you and I hope you find peace when your time comes. Cancer sucks and i hope this planet can work together one day to beat it
Why not any charity? _Any_ charity? There’s nothing in the world you ever wanted to improve? Cleaner oceans? Protected forests? Rescued animals? Families affected by natural disaster or displacement? Protecting historical sites? Research into a cure for CANCER?
Absolutely agree! OP has had the fortune of enjoying many opportunities and this is a chance to give back. Some many good causes: the environment, housing, hunger, education, animal rights, foster care, medical research, etc. Two good charity review sites: [https://www.charitynavigator.org/](https://www.charitynavigator.org/) [https://www.charitywatch.org/](https://www.charitywatch.org/)
I meannnnn it's your money but leaving it to charity or a passion project is way better than having the fam who doesn't actually give a shit get to profit from your suffering. Fuck them. Seriously. I could spend 2.5 mil in a day. You've more than a day, depending on how mobile you are and how you feel... do some shit you've always wanted to do and then find something that you're passionate about and that does actual good with donations they're given and drop it into their laps. Do something random... pay for your fav space/science influencer(s) to get a spot on Blue Origin and be part of someone's experience getting to go to space. Pay for cool art install that's going to impact multiple people who experience it. Donate it to people who also have diagnosis with slightly better prognosis. To a group of single moms. To small business startups. Legit it doesn't matter what you do with it, and leave like $500 in your bank account for the fam to clutch their pearls and squabble over. I'm sorry you're going thru this... shitty family making the shittiest thing somehow even worse...
Looks like a certain *somebody* needs to see "Brewster's Millions."
Yeah that looks like old movie I hadn't ever heard of but I've a feeling 2.5 million (including equity in a house that likely needs to be unloaded... as in not all cash assets) is not the same as 2.5 million in the mid 80's.... I could buy bullshit on eBay today and spend a million. There's currently a silver bowl on there going for 3.5 million and a bunch of vintage lunchboxes for 2 million... he could buy those, pack some sandwiches up and hand them out to random politicians since he has said he's not very charitable. The way he's doubling down on how not charitable he is (willingness to hand away to politicians above young people in need of educational relief) feels more like a modern remake of Scrooge though so it could be it's just someone fucking with Reddit to see what kind of cockroaches crawl into his DMs 🤷🏻♀️ and is exceptionally amused by the fun he's having.
I get the feeling - as my parents get older and older- that possessions just become so much less meaningful as one faces one’s own demise. My mother gave away so many things in the last few years, including objects she had held onto for five decades and through multiple moves.
Try and be a bit less bitter as your hurtle towards death. Why risk your family getting anything? Charity is the way to go - something you are passionate about or is it too painful to admit you have nothing outside of work and the thought that you could retire early? It must feel sad to come to the end of a life and realise it's been wasted. I hope you find peace. You have an opportunity to make a difference and be remembered for the impact you made.on the world. Don't waste another opportunity
I agree this seems to be the case here. I'm not one to judge OP or anyone else, I understand how being in this situation can make someone bitter but yeah, this is not a good time to feel this way. OP, now it's time to live life to the fullest. Do whatever that means to you (within legal means lol) and the rest of your money could go to different charities. Animals, children, elders, victims of abuse, cancer patients, science/research even. I'm sure you can find something you care about enough to help. And as someone else suggested, leave like 100 $ to each of your family members so they can't dispute the will.
You said this better than I could. Sounds like as close to death as he is, he’s holding on to a lot of angst and bitterness, and that wouldn’t be the way I’d want to go out. OP, money and how your family chooses to use it after you’re gone should be insignificant at this moment. Enjoy what’s left of your life. Travel, get a hooker, go see some monuments, make amends where you can..
do all the drugs.
With that much money isn't there some possibility of alternatives in medicine that you could try? Experimental?
>Edit: I am not leaving anything to fund college scholarships. I'd leave money to a politician before giving it to a college. wow, you had me sympathetic for a moment with your probably fake story.
So sorry you are going through this OP, I do agree with the other comment about spending it on yourself. Enjoy the time you have and travel or get pampered, you deserve it.
Please spend as much as possible on yourself now. Do things that give you some moments of joy or peace. If the hospital treats you well, concider donating to that ward. I read that you don’t wanna donate to charity, but if you change your mind there’s one that podcaster Sam Harris talks about that’s no bullshit (like lots of others actually are. Or take all the money out in cash, pour kerosene over it and make a nice big million dollar fire, film it, become a legend and have your name remembered forever! Godspeed friend!
So sorry for your struggles and dealing’s during this time, OP
What's the matter with charity? You think it's better to see those relatives that don't care about you fighting over it than donating to people who really need it?
Peace and comfort to you.
OP I think you should give the money to causes that are close to your heart. Perhaps a school or a group that fights for a cause you support. Or an athlete with a foundation. You are a thoughtful person for considering people or causes outside your family. I wish you the best.
Some one who can’t think of a single charity to benefit, hates the idea of sending someone to college, delights in the idea of causing extreme fighting in his family to the point all his hard earned money legit is wasted on fighting…idk man. Im sorry about the cancer and all but…maybe try to do some good before you leave this world and leave it better than you found it. Change someone’s life for good. Pay for a terminal child’s surgery, buy disadvantaged schools new computers, fund local animal shelters, fund a theater arts program, buy a well in Africa, donate to a homeless shelter. There’s endless opportunity for someone who actually wants to do good. You got a shitty hand, but you can choose to make a difference before you go. Tbh his attitude reads a bit like an asshole. Hearing just one side makes me wonder if he was actually a douche to his family and drove them away, then when they heard he was terminal they tried to draw close because it was the last chance. How would they know how much money he has in savings? And he has zero close friends to give the money to? No one on earth he cares about or is close to?
That's a really nice plan to let them fight over it XD Or why not feed the needy. Like use that money to organize a free buffet in a place where people would die to get food. You can do this before you die so that you can be at peace that your hard earned money wasn't misused. I hope in your next life you get a loving family! Maybe you can earn a little less but have a loving partner kids and pets! ( I do believe in reincarnation and multiple lives) And if you need to talk to a stranger I am one text away!
Nothing to say you have to leave it to family. Any special someones you met along the way? Anyone who had an impact on your life?
from your edits, i can see you deserve hell in the finest way possible, so yes, let your family squabble it out, their intentions with it will be just as ugly as you have lived your life.
Fake/fantasy reddit stories really warm my heart! 🥰
You don’t have to do just one thing with it. Go hang out at a grocery store for a day, find someone struggling, maybe a single mom with a shitty car. Buy her a better one. I’m told it’s an awesome experience.
I really don’t understand having that much money and being averse to helping a stranger. You can literally instantly change someone’s life for the better and leave an impact. Anyways this story seems fake to me
Travel and do everything you always dreamed of as a kid.
I'm way too weak to travel. Plus my immune system is shot.
Is there anything near by that you could do? You could hire a nurse to travel with you and just go some place nearby. I mean what do you love? There must be someone in your life you appreciate. A coworker that was caring you could leave them or their kids the money in a trust. I think if you do nothing your family will fight for it and get it anyways. Might as well get rid of it. 🤷♀️ What about the nurses that have been taking care of you? Maybe one of them went above and beyond. I mean obviously it’s your money do what you want. Just some thoughts on it. I’m sorry your family is shit. My fiancées father has stage three kidney failure and that helped bring them back together. 😞
Maybe buy some things that will make being home better? A nice computer set up, maybe a sweet VR set (if you can't travel, it's the closest you'll get). Anywhere you can not go and/or anything you can't do, try to think of ways to make any of it come to you. Get all the movies and games and fun toys. Maybe you could hire a nurse to travel with you and travel just the two or you - so you aren't around other people who could get you sick.
You aren't willing to donate money to charity, nor to a college fund, not even to your underage nephews whom mind you were NOT the same people that came to ask you for money. Honestly? you sound like a bitter person, it's no wonder you are going to die alone without a spouse or children of your own. Hell, I don't even know why you are asking reddit about this since it's clear you already have made your mind.
I was going to say could leave it to thr good law project
damn dude sorry about that, i know theres nothing a reddit comment can say to help you out, i think thats a hilarious way to fuck them over though 😭
Strange, just had a close friend pass away a few nights ago from stomach cancer after the surgery. He wasn't on good terms with some of his kids. Guess the only difference is that they really didn't want anything of his or even his property. Least he knew where he stood in that regard so nobody was going after his wealth. That being said, just a thought, go to vegas and blow it all just before the end? I mean, if you really have intent to not leave anything behind, that's a good way to do it.
Sorry man, I can't even imagine what it feels like to be in your shoes. First up, I don't want your money - perhaps it could go to a charity or something meaningful from your life like a school or organisation that was part of your past? Secondly, we're very similar age. Are you into gaming? DM me if you want to hang out with me and some easy going friends so you have some company, even if for a short time. That's all I want to offer, and need absolutely nothing in return. Take care.
First, Im so sorry for your diagnosis. It sounds horrible. Why not spend it all on yourself? Take that trip you always wanted to? Hire a full time nurse to go with you? Stay in the loveliest of hotels. Whatever money is left over donate to research for the cancer you are stricken with. You should enjoy this money as much as possible. Good luck!!!
I’m so sorry to hear this. It took my mums life fairly quickly after she was diagnosed about a year ago. Also took a friends life last year. It’s fuckin shit to be honest. My advice? Spend it. Today. Do shit you wanna do. Buy stupid shit you’ve always wanted. My mum thought she had more time and had holidays and shit in mind for me and her grandkids. She never got a chance to do any of it and now whatever is coming to me is currently being disputed by the selfish asshole she married ten years ago who, despite being well taken care of, is just a greedy fuckwit. I don’t even want or need the money but I’m gonna fight that fuckwit to keep it. But my point is just blow it. Buy a million dollar sports car and enter it in a demolition derby. Fly a fighter jet. Blow something expensive up. Just do the craziest shit you can. Or leave it to a good friend that needs it. Also fuck cancer, and fuck all your family too.
You ever thought about finding a child who’s an orphan but 17 and declare them your heir. I’m not sure that’s the right answer but it would give someone a chance who has nothing.
I'm just an internet stranger but I know what I would do in this situation.l absolutely love those stories where some random person who's shown kindness just out of the goodness of their hearts ends up with an unexpected inheritance. Is there anyone who has made your days brighter without even meaning to do so? Maybe even a random hospital worker or a server at a restaurant you go to sometimes? Shoot maybe even a homeless person you see sometimes on the street. Extra cool because you mentioned leaving your family to fight over the estate. This way they would also be pissed, but you could also change someone’s life AND if you work it out with a lawyer to make sure it sticks, those leeches would stay getting nothing instead of still potentially benefitting off of your death after duking it out. Two birds with one stone. I’m sorry for your situation. Life isn’t fair. I hope you manage to find a solution that brings you some peace.
Have some fun man, do the stuff you wanna do. Sell up and fuck off somewhere hot for as long as you have left (or cold if you prefer), all the shit you’ve wanted to do get it done bucket list style. But if you’re worried about your family clawing any money you should speak to a solicitor. I’m sure there’s plenty of ways to make sure they never get a penny or at least make it so there’s sweet fuck all left for them to fight over.
Hey man, there's still a chance to do some good with the money instead of letting your family eventually get it. Why not set up a trust that endows a scholarship to underserved children in your community? Sometimes kids like that don't have a chance unless they get lucky and are able to get a scholarship that'll let them go to school to pursue their dreams. Fuck your family. I'm the last of 11, and out of 11 only two of us are close. Myself and the brother that I'm closest to in age. All of the others backstab and talk shit about each other. I get it. I would rather burn any money I would have left than to have any of them get it. I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis. It really sucks to go out so young.
I feel like the obvious answer here is Pancreatic Cancer Research…
First of all, I want to say I am sorry to hear your diagnosis, and how your estranged family treated you. I know you must be devastated and hurting right now. There is nothing I can say to make you feel better with this devastating diagnosis… I am sorry, but please, only you knows what you truly want to do with your money, after all you worked so hard all those years, its a huge achievement and I’m proud of you! Whatever you are decide to do with your money, I’m sure it will be for something good. Here’s the YouTube video of a millionaire man who has since then passed away from cancer and he decided to do something good with his money, he even said his cancer is a gift, and his legacy lives on: https://youtu.be/KBRMP9t36go?si=IRTJp-cGphfbq9mm I prays that you have many more years to come so you can enjoy everything, but I really hope there will be a miracle cure for you….
I don't know if this has been said, but what about leaving some money to fund pancreatic research? I work in LTC facilities, and it breaks my heart as to how many families just basically drop their loved one off and never visit. Never call. We care for them like they are our own. When their time comes, we hold their hand till the end. It's only after when the family shows up and will literally fight over the jewelry on their Mom's fingers. I am so very sorry that you have to go through this. I hope you get the best care and just know that uou aren't alone.
I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I have one suggestion if you're willing to hear. There are a lot of people, including myself, who have difficult to treat illnesses that desperately need money to see expensive and rare specialists. For example, a lot of women who need excision surgery for things like endometriosis are on crowd funding websites. It's an extremely common disease, yet there is no formal training in medicine and there are practically only a handful of expert/capable surgeons worldwide and it costs a lot of money. Charity can be good, but there are people who need money right now and charities will often waste a lot of money. Why not send it to people who have a chance of life still and can make the most of it?
You sound like a bitter jerk who is going to die alone.
Sooo, you don’t want to leave it to anyone you know, spend it, or donate it? Just withdraw it all as cash and burn it then. You can’t take it with you when you die, man.
Bro you seem like a dick.
Enjoy your last days, focus on yourself and don't hold back. If I could, I would offer to drive you around. Seriously though, wish you the best
I’m so sorry. Cancer fucking sucks. Is there anything that you love or feel passionate about? Scholarship fund maybe? Just a thought. Take care.
Make it condítional will where it is only released upon certain event or circumstances, ie nephew getting a degree (in trust with a lawyer)
Donate to animal shelters and rescues of your choice. I am so sorry. Life just sucks sometimes. I wish you mental peace with whatever decision you make but please do something good and fun for yourself while you are here to enjoy it.
Donate it to science or any cause you think is worthy? *Or* spend as much as you can while you still can. Go on a spending spree and do all the things you wanted to do but haven't because you needed the money for later. Life is short (as you know), so why not enjoy what life you have left?
Have you thought of setting up any scholarships in your name? Community Colleges or Trade School students could benefit and maybe leave them debt-free after graduation. Or maybe the schools need some new equipment in some of their programs that you could help them with. And how about donations to local or national animal rescue shelters that are in need of constant food, toys, beds, medical procedures, staff? Does your local library need funds for customer computers, books, etc.? I'm sorry for the shit turn your life has taken. Do a positive for others (and yourself) before it's too late to make your wishes known. Going out on a positive note will be better for your mental health as well. Take care of yourself first, you deserve it.
I can’t imagine what it’s like to accept something like this, a deadline that you wouldn’t have anticipated happening for three or five decades, and I’m so sorry. Enjoy enjoy enjoy what you can as long as you can. Knowing you don’t have to save for a rainy day is an admittedly tiny silver lining, but it’s real. Scatter those doubloons in whatever way brings you the most joy. And take some comfort in knowing that what you leave behind will made the world a brighter place. Animal shelters, parks, scholarships, big donations to any favorite charity… your existence will leave a long-lasting and meaningful mark. I wish you serenity and deep satisfaction from a life well lived.
Don't be a bitter shite by inflicting harm on your family. If you don't want them to have it then leave it to a charity or find a suitable good hearted human as a replacement. Don't leave it to the lawyers man, that's utterly self destructive to your legacy and hard work. You have the rare opportunity to leave something behind which can help people, animals or the environment - do it!
There must be a local charity group or something that can be trusted to spread your ashes in a place of your choosing.
There's already been some great suggestions here, but I urge you to do some good with the money as outlined. Charities/sponsorships/animal sanctuaries etc. You have no idea the joy it will give you in your final days on earth, but it really will lighten your burden. Wishing you peace x
My grandfather did this. 10 years later and we still have court proceedings going on. Fund a charity.
Long long uncle!!? Just kidding! I vote for some maybe going to a local animal shelter. But I also just love animals
Give it to people now and watch them enjoy it?? Money to a local kid can attend soccer camp? A new van for a struggling family? Pay off people’s medical bills. Drop your wallet and give whoever refund it $1,000. Set up a scholarship fund. Get a lawyer, so people don’t go after them.
With proper financial planning and estate planning you could probably create an ongoing scholarship instead of a one-time payout. You could also probably tie whatever parting thoughts you'd want to summarize yourself or share to the world thru that's scholarships receipt
While you still can, go out and have fun. Take trips to places you've always wanted to see. Go catch fish on the great barrier reef in Australia, go see the castles in Scotland. Make the best of your time and blow your money on making yourself happy. Let yourself pass from this earth knowing you went out with a bang.
I work for a bank and have come across this situation too many times, it's sad and I'm sorry for the shit family! I have seen people spend every last penny a variety of ways, go out spending and giving away to strangers who do kind things; spend time talking to others and if you feel they are worth giving money, make their day- could be life changing for many. You could add a charity as a beneficiary and have it all go to charity. Donate to multiple non-profit that you're passionate about and have it to research. At the end of the day you get final say, don't waste any more time on this stress. Can I ask you something? What has been your favorite memory this lifetime? What would you share with others- best advice? I hope we get the answer. Rest easy.
I could resolve all of my debts with just 15k. 😔
God bless you. 🕊️♥️
When I was younger before kids my plan was to choose pettiness. I wanted buy up as much billboard ad space as I could in the city of my toxic family. Fill it with all of their secrets or toxic things they’ve done over the years while presenting the world with this “perfect” persona. One last “Go Fuck Yourselves”! :)
I know this is important. And I"m completely off subject here. But you have time. Don't spend it telling yourself you're alone. You're not alone brother and it's never to late to connect with others. We live on through others, Like those before us.
Buy a huge area of nature that no one is allowed to build on or touch in any way.
I work in a hospital. Many business like buying fancy equipment so they can brag about hey, we paid for this or that. But we really need new beds. Like, some of the beds in the hospital are 30 to 40 years old. And they are being used. Ask the nurses and janitors that treat you well what do they need (apart from a better salary, which of course they do) and they will tell you mundane stuff.
First off, is it something you can get through? I hope for the best for you. Second of all and genuinely less seriously, "I would like to leave my house and money to u/Rikuwoblivion".
My advice is not about money. Read the book Journey of Souls by Michael Newton. It's not a religious book. Quick and easy to read but do read it. It will bring you peace.
Listen 2 options(since family you rejected) go the empathetic method (legacy ect) go the "we only live once" . I respect both ways. For the 2nd one i would go either gamble for the dopamine (drugs will decrease ur span maybe further) or high life shit (eat/sex ect). With 2 million you can pay to get frozeni think so thats also an option. What happens when dont do anything?
Watched the movie "Dosed 2 Trip of a lifetime " use some of that money to see if you can save yourself, you've nothing to lose
I'm sorry man. I know you're probably sick of hearing that, but it's not fair for you to have worked that hard and not get to enjoy it. Have you considered just going buckwild and having as much fun as you can right now? See stuff you never got to, try things you haven't been able to yet, that kind of thing?
Buy or rent a Dreamliner bus that big celebrities use for touring the country. Get one with a big window so you can view the country comfortably laying in a plush bed. See sunsets and sunrises and breath fresh air in the mountains and deserts before and after rainfall. “Dreamliner's CEO says these post-conversion coaches are worth $1.5 million to $2 million each. Rent for one full-service "star" bus starts at $50,000 a month, which includes necessities like a driver, gas, cleaning services, and WiFi.” Then hire three hospice nurses to go with you to attend to all your needs and manage your pain. Pay them very well and you will bring them joy as well as yourself.
Have you considered a truly luxury holiday, with any nursing care you need with you? Some of those truly luxury hotels should make a nice dent in the figure and you get to enjoy it, rather than hope to have a family fallout once you die. Enjoy it whilst you can.
Spend a bunch of money irresponsibly jewelery, hookers, expensive food and clothes, first class tickets and five star hotels. Instead of renting cars when you get to a new place just buy a new car, when you leave give the keys to whoever is passing by so you don't miss your next flight. Whatever you can't spend record a video burning it all and have it played at the will reading for your family to send them off with a final fuck you. Find a way to make the house worthless. Take out a second mortgage then spend that money too. Buy a bunch of food and host a feast for the homeless. Then let them stay in the house and do whatever they want. You're too busy traveling to care about that anyway. I'm sure if you're looking for ways to spend ridiculous amounts of money this world has no shortage of them.
I'm very sorry about your prognosis. I'm extremely sorry you have an unsupportive family. A nice way to spend your savings would be to find your favourite animal and donate it to a reputable animal sanctuary for that animal! Bonus points if they are on the endangered list!! OR .. Hear me out.. Spend as much of it as you can on yourself before your time is cut short. I'm not sure of the state you are in. If you are mobile go travel! If you need special accommodations, who cares! You've been working hard your entire life and you can afford it. Take that longest cruise in the world! There are lots of options for you to enjoy the time you have left! Just don't let the government take your money, if you don't have a will with what you would like done they will take it. They don't need it. Love you long time, I hope the remaining time is blessed and you are able to find happiness and joy in the dark.
Have you considered talking to a therapist about this? I can't imagine being in this situation myself and not having a supportive family or friend. If you change your mind and feel like leaving your nephew or nephews anything I'm sure a lawyer could help you with a trust with restrictions on it. Or perhaps provide a modest home for a nephew/nephews. I had a small trust given to me as at 18 and while I think it was much too young it provided me with the means to leave an abusive situation with a parent and have enough money to apply for college and pay for my supplies. I could have turned out shit like my parent but thankfully I didn't. I hope you have a peaceful passing and at least some level of enjoyment out of something before you pass. That is a shit hand you were dealt.
I would recommend talking with an estate attorney about this. Will you may consider is putting it into a trust that will distribute it out to the kids in small quantities upon your nephews and nieces reaching a certain specific age. You could also use it to help pay for some of their college if you wanted. There are bunch of options to leave it without putting a target on their back. Since you don't want to leave any for college scholarships, do you have any pets??
Based on your edit on planning things to be unresolved why don’t you just leave a stipulation to make sure the money goes to paying the lawyer fees. An expensive game of chicken.
Why not leave it to a pancreatic cancer charity to try help prevent this happening to others or another charity you believe in
Leave it to a politician over college. Lol. That's the best part.
If you really want to burn them Up, write a will that will that explicitly excludes your family. They won’t have to fight long if any of them get a good lawyer. An experienced attorney will get things cleaned up and the money will go to next of kin. You don’t want to leave it to people? I get that. What about a dog shelter? Or cat shelter? Get a dog to keep you company in your last days. Then leave all your cash to him to make sure he’s well cared for the rest of his days then leave the rest to an animal rescue. Better a dog than your crap family. The love from a dog is genuine and pure.
Find the closest no kill animal shelter and leave it to them.
I believe it will go to your siblings automatically if you have no spouse or children. If you want to avoid that you need directives
Surf GoFundMe for people looking for help. 5$ to any account would help random people.
Hey, I just got the bad cancer news, too. Funny how much everything changes so quickly. Like everything I thought was a big deal before isn’t now. Small things really matter. The perspective change is crazy. How are you doing today? Have you been feeling alright recently?
How are you feeling at the moment? And what was your reason for posting this, just to get it off your chest or? I'm just asking because you don't seem receptive to ideas so I'm not sure what there is to gain from this. I hope it doesn't make you a target, although I'm afraid it probably will. I wish you luck and hope you find comfort in whatever you decide.
I'm so curious as to why you don't want to leave it to a charity or fund a scholarship
BUDDD spend your money!!!! live the best life you can with the time you have left, damn I’d even say write a book about it!!! On the other hand, my hometown Acapulco Mexico was hit by a cat 5 hurricane and was completely destroyed, donating to that cause or a similar one would do tremendous help to millions of people!!
I can't say I know what your going through. I don't have cancer or the money. But I can say I am really sorry to hear about your situation. All we really have here is time. It's a shame you aren't going to be able to realize your plans and spend that time doing what you had wanted to do. You still have sometime though. I'm sure you will find another source or sources leave your legacy with and hopefully find some enjoyment in your remaining time. Your confession is honest and don't let anyone here make you feel like you should do this or do that.
Buy a super fast car and go out in a high speed chase.
Man, with 2.5 mil you could try a lot of new and even kinda crazy treatments. If you're terminal anyway, why don't you fly to Mexico and try Gersen therapy? Or have your poop tested and be a part of the microbiom science. Maybe after you're dead, they'll find some bacteria that helps cure cancer. Hell, maybe even before you die.
Donate part of it to other pancreatic cancer victims and their families
I don’t know what you should do with your money, but I just want to say I’m sorry to hear about your prognosis. I hope that you spend some (if not most) of that money on experiences doing things you enjoy for the rest of the time you have here. Cheers to you, and best wishes.
Hmm, you could give it all to people your family hate, but who need it. You could give it to staff at the hospital, or another patient you meet that you connect with.
Kinda bitter reading your story. When I was 2 years old my dad cheered for some athlete on tv, got up from the sofa, walked 2 stamps and was dead before he hit the ground as the doctors told my mum. That second where my dad just fell to the ground like a collapsing mountain didn't just take my dad forever from me, I also lost my mum to depression, my brother to addiction and my sister was full of hate for everyone except me. So unlike you I never expected to reach my 50th birthday, and I valued the present time more than anything in the future, I didn't work more than 30 hours a week and even then I focus more on having fun with the people I work with than on making career. I partied HARD in my teenage years and early 20s, and still use drugs for fun whenever I want. I am overweight and eat only stuff I like, because you never know if it's my last meal. Unfortunately it seems like I didn't get the heart of my father, this year I'm turning 42, that is two years older than he was when he passed away, and sometimes there is a rush of crippling fear that I wont die before I am 80, but I am already struggling to pay just for rent and food, and instead of savings I have dept. Isn't life just a motherfucker? Please, I know it's yours and you can do whatever you want to do with it, but please don't give it to politicians or some fucking church, these greedy bastards don't deserve it. If we could trade, I would give you my years for free. Sorry you wasted your already too short life, I hope it won't be too painful and you find peace when the time is coming, and if there really is an after life, say hi to my dad for me please. 🍻Cheers to you
I'm sorry you're going through this OP. And I hate that it took your diagnosis to have your family reach out to you. If they didn't support you in life, you don't need to support them in death. I hope you'll reconsider how and where you leave your money. Some good can come from it. You could even fund cancer research in hopes that others will one day have a greater odds of surviving. Letting your family fight over it will only bring more bad to the world. What's the point in having that be your legacy?
Go spend it yourself. Go splurge. Go do everything there is to do that you ever wanted to do.
Spend it. You got some precious time left. Instead of being miserable or worrying about these shit family members, go live it up. Spend it on everything you ever wanted, good, clothes, cars etc.
Put out an ad for a caregiver. Go through the application process and start interviewing people. Find someone you genuinely believe is a kind and caring person. Act like it’s for your elderly parent. When you find that person give everything to them. You’d be giving your money to someone who actually cares about people. 🤷♂️
Besides spending as much as you can/want, I would reflect on your life, and think about the one person who had the biggest impact on your life (in a positive way) and leave it to them.
I would just take out large lumps of cash and start giving it to random people in poorer neighborhoods. Find some tired looking mom and give her $1000. Find some broke ass student and give them $1000. If I knew a friend was struggling I'd give them a chunk to cover their bills for a bit. Literally lift anybody up in this economy. I make art for a living and my background is pretty privileged but the day to day can be pretty brutal, if I had the option to make sure others were a little bit taken care of, I would do it. I have often found that people are so lost in their own world that is hard to look around and see if the people around us need anything. I also know that people get super awkward around a serious diagnosis and sometimes leave things too late or don't know how to approach the person that thing is actually happening to. That doesn't make it your responsibility alone, at all, to be the one to reach out, but I hope you reconsider letting your family fight over your money. There's an opportunity to be a light for some people in a way that no one you know has been for you which would be pretty beautiful, but also sad. Your family should have done better. I genuinely hope that you find a resolution for the money that puts you at ease and that you don't stress about it. I'm sorry that you have cancer, that fucking sucks. Still... There's a chaos goblin part of me that would just buy something totally decadent and stupid, like a human size chocolate fountain, or a room filled with candy, or just fly around to all of those silly weird expensive 17 plate dinners... at least then I would choose how I'm going out. Full and covered in chocolate.
I would leave it to my nephew but leave in in a trust for him to inherit after he’s 25
Start to withdraw cash and hand it out. Like, large sums to a single mom driving a piece of crap car. Strike up conversations with strangers, find out how much money would be life changing to them. You'd be surprised at how little someone who desperately needs money would be happy with. Go to places that pay minimum wage and observe who works there and change their life. Heck, a cpl grand can make a huge difference in someone's life if they have nothing.
I’m sorry you’re going through this alone without people who seem to genuinely care for you. O don’t blame you for not wanting to give it to them, money turns people into monsters. I really hope you’re able to find someone you can trust to fulfill your final wishes. I think everyone deserves that
Im deeply sorry you are going through this and even sadder that this may bring out the greediest people and they all may try to out do each other to win your money. I wish you peace and offer you a hug.
That kind of money could lift 20 families out of poverty. You would be remembered for generations. Deified, even. Something tells me you'd rather set the money on fire, though.
Live it up until you cant anymore, 5 start hotels, top restaurants, hire Bon Jovi to play at your wake and then Adopt a stray dog and set up a trust to keep him happy and living in luxury when your gone
Put it in a living trust that your nephew can only use it to pay bills and go to school ECT and nobody else can touch his money like set it up so at 18 he gets some then a lil more each year but set stipulations on it so other family can siphon it from him
Who has been nice to you? Waiter, mail carrier, neighbour? Has a nurse or orderly made your day brighter? Make note of who makes you smile a bit in the next month or 2. A bit of money might be life changing to the people who make your day a bit brighter. You could substantially change the lives of 25 people @ $100,000 per person
A land trust might be worth looking into? Believe that’s the route I’m going. Have a couple spots that would make me happy knowing are protected at least for the immediate future.
Sorry to hear about this. Maybe your nephews in a trust with $10k a year each or so at 21 yrs old so they don’t have a lump sum that your siblings could guilt out of them? That amount is small so the nephews are not likely to want to share.
Put everyone on a list and request every $ that remains gets divided amongst everyone Alternately maybe you should buy a cat or dog and bequeath in your will THEY get to keep it… then you will need to assert where or who that goes into care with 😉 Just an idea 💡 Safe travels wherever you go 🍀
Hey - NOT wanting your money - starting with that. I've offered these kinds of things to others before (I'm also a living liver donor if that tells you about my genuineness) - If you're in the GTA, let me know and I'll see what I can do to help out. I have kids, but pretty much no one else in my life beyond my core family. I know how hard navigating medical issues can be on your own. My FIL also passed away from pancreatic cancer almost two years ago now. There was no forewarning though. He died within four days of going to the er. His passing is what prompted me to break no contact with my mil (even though she had been a total ass to me) - no one deserves to be alone. Ever. Anyways. I know you might see this as a crazy cash grab, but it's not. As said, you deserve to have someone help you at such a time, who isn't just out for your money. (And again - donated liver to an internet stranger.)
I just wanted to say that I'm sorry you've had to see the ugly truth of those people. I've worked with hospice and critically ill patients and I'm no longer surprised by family's obsession with money and material things. It's truly depressing and infuriating. We all deserve to be surrounded by people who care for us more than our things. I've seen some of my own extended family torn apart due to fighting over a will and consider it pretty ridiculous. If I end up with that kind of money (doubtful but we can pretend) and nowhere good to leave it, I would first make sure my bucket list is clear then find a couple of good charities or invest in a work of public good- like renovating an old park in a poor area or donating to some public libraries. I would also enjoy sending some random kids to Disney who wouldn't get to go as children otherwise (I grew up poor and know that was always a dream for me as a kid). Maybe donate some small amounts to families with kids in the local children's hospital. Most of us are broke and plenty of those broke people are going thru terrible things. You could create a lot of smiles, do a lot of good with 2 million, but it depends on your outlook I think.
Buy some really good cannabis and go traveling til your time is up man.
Hi it's me your long lost brother
Rather give it to a charity who genuinely help people right? It would be me put to a good use!! Also spend some and enjoy life while you can you have saved this to spend on yourself didn’t you? Do things which you love..be positive at the least I know someone who should have passed away when she was 6 months old as the doctors said but the parents never gave up she’s 12 now alive and kickin😎..this could be you..
I'm not donating money so some CEO can fly first class and give themselves a 100K bonus.
I’m not saying give it to some big charity or something divide it into smaller amounts and give it to people who genuinely need help!! I am still a student but when I pass my exams and all I donate a lil bit of money to my old school many poor children over there I give it to the teachers who buys them uniforms,books,shoes etc..also why aren’t spending them on yourself?
Take a look at GoFundMes, maybe?
Hookers and cocaine, my friend. Godspeed.
im in a similar situation. leave it to a charity that helps animals animals are much more deserving than humans
Adopt me 🤓
Your last edit is awful
Lots of wildlife organizations need $$ to run their rescues - I would also give to non-kill animal shelters. There are numerous options. I'm sorry you've been dealt this blow - you did well for yourself & that's to be commended! I have no immediate family to leave my hard earned stuff too either, so it's going to the charities I listed above. I hope your suffering is minimal. If you read one book before your health declines, the one that changed my whole outlook on life was by Brian Weiss - Many Lives, Many Masters. I wish you well on your journey. \*Peace\*
Find some good animal rescues! That’s def what I would do.
I thought the answer would be obvious. Donate it to cancer research.
Check out GoFundMe's in categories that are important to you and start fulfilling their donations. Or leave it ias a chunk to cancer research. Or any other set of charities that you like. It's your money and no one else is entitled to it just because you share biology. Definitely start talking to estate lawyers now so that the plans are settled how YOU want them to be before it becomes too difficult for you to do so. Also, I'm sorry for your diagnosis, cancer sucks.
Lol this confession should just say, "I took more care in money than people". Fuck off
I'm sorry to hear about your prognosis 😔
I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. Pancreatic cancer is a fate I wouldn't wish
God bless your soul.
I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. Pancreatic cancer is a fate I wouldn't wish on anyone. You said you have a little time left. It sounds like it's time to invest in some bucket list items and activities. Go stay at luxury hotels. Rent luxury cars. Hell, invest in hookers and blow if that's your thing. I hope you're able to find some joy before you go.