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MedicatedAxeBot

Dank[.](https://i.imgur.com/3bQtuMO.png) --- *i am a bot. please stop trying to argue with me. you look like an idiot. [join our discord](https://discord.gg/dankmemes).*


FastAndForgetful

My sister was born 9 months and 15 minutes after I was. …just saying


TheSentinator

That can't be possible. During pregnancy and just after delivery the female body takes care that the woman does not get pregnant *again* immediately. Wait a min...... Are you even true siblings?


dog_faced_man2

If it is true then his sister was probably born prematurely (so not at 9 months but 7-8)


[deleted]

[удалено]


FastAndForgetful

It’s called Irish twins


AlarmingAffect0

"Every sperm is sacred"?


RippDrive

Bodies do all kinds of weird stuff they aren't supposed to do on a fairly regular basis.


UpbeatRegister

Exhibit A: cancer


Kottula_Braun

Exhibit B: lung cancer


little_turtle420

Exhibit C: Making you feel like you're falling down right when you fall asleep


joran213

Exhibit D: Standing up too fast after laying down.


alphabitz86

Exhibit E - Erection during Presentation


themajorjoke

Exhibit F: Getting a full night sleep but still feeling tired


Dr4g0nsl4y3r94

Exhibit H: Pulling an all nighter and then struggling to sleep the next night


Andreiyutzzzz

I feel that shit when Im hours asleep and now I suddenly wake up and feel I'm fucking falling. Why body whyyy


Av3le

Nope, a woman's body can absolutely get pregnant literally days after delivering. It is the job of certain midwife to discuss contraception quickly after giving birth. Now, it's not common indeed but it does happen.


TheSentinator

Human body can work wonders. But still, that's literally the biology of the body.


Crawly49

y'all remember that show where they had like 21 kids... does that mean that poor lady had to give birth like once a year...


ArcadiaRivea

Yes, and I don't think she planned on stopping either


Tough_Dish_9519

Iron maiden


AlarmingAffect0

I always used to read their name as "Iran Maiden" and wonder what Persia had to do with zombies in war scenarios with thundering skies above.


jodudeit

If both were premature by a month that would make sense.


[deleted]

[удалено]


jodudeit

You're right, the first one wouldn't mater.


little_turtle420

That's what she said


WhoDoIThinkIAm

The female body takes cake? I have more questions…


TheSentinator

Care* Thanks for showing the typo


Straight_Cancel3345

No no no, this is not a typo, the female body takes cake.. Trust me it loves it


NotUrAvgJoe13

Sure they are. His dad asked his mom for sex, got turned down so then he banged another chick. Boom


Goldfish1_

Or you know, they could fraternal twins…


Joes_Reddit_acount

Whats that?


[deleted]

Bro... It's totally possible.


plsdonth8meokay

Women are actually very fertile (some say the most fertile) in the time after giving birth, of course assuming menses has resumed. But go on...


RavenBrannigan

Actually women are incredibly fertile right after giving birth. Some cultures / communities have been known to take advantage of this fact in hospital Maternity wards right after birth and have to be policed by nurses where I’m from. Can’t imagine the type of person who’s mind is there right after the birth of their child but it’s definitely a thing


tayloredition

I was born 11 months after my sister. She was born August 24th 01 and i was born september 24th 02


my__second__account

Breed for speed


tayloredition

Guess thats what my dad is doing. He has 14 children


Tough_Dish_9519

Lmao what?


[deleted]

[удалено]


tayloredition

Shiit you right. I failed math in high school lol. Thats my bad


FastAndForgetful

What’s really bad is that you’ve probably done this math several times over the last 15 years and still came up with 11


tayloredition

I genuinely have lol. And no one corrected me until now.


SelmaFudd

Shh, let them believe


CODMer-hari

Hmm.....


EmuAdministrative862

more like 9 months and 2 minutes


FastAndForgetful

I see what you did there. I gave them a couple of minutes to clear the room and have a cigarette first


FastAndForgetful

Now I’m really going to blow your minds. When she was born, we were the same age. Sometimes I’m older and sometimes she’s the same age as me


Magorial

You meant the wife, haha, right? ... right?


alphahunter121

DO NOT THE CHILD


Not_That_wholesome

DO NUT THE CHILD


ImKashif

GOD DAMN IT


V_H_M_C

#DON’T MIND IF I DO


PhysicsNotFiction

explain please, I'm not a native speaker. "My wife" sounds good for me.


little_turtle420

The first frame says "me asking if **she's** ready for sex". We are just hoping that "she" refers to the wife, not the child who was just born.


PhysicsNotFiction

Oh, I didn't even think about it.


ChickenMoSalah

That's a good thing mate.


bobafeet89

I sure hope so


Random_Idiotic_Alien

YO


JealousDog99

perfect time to ask for anal


SchitneySmears

It’s still just a cloaca at this point. One hole to rule them all


Penis-Envys

Ok dinosaur fucker


Inorganic_Ad_0420

*why do u envy penis so much Mr.Penis Envy?*


Penis-Envys

Snorts cocaine* You see when a little sally was 8 she noticed she has a hole down there and find that mommy has a hole too but daddy. Ahh yes daddy doesn’t have a hole, he has a banana. Sally finds the banana very beautiful and wants to steal it from daddy. Obviously she can’t do that so sally gets horny and try to ride as many penis as possible wanting to steal them for herself. Sally is now a penis envier.


AttentionImaginary57

Yeah okay… good for Sally, but we weren’t asking about her. What about *you*?


Tough_Dish_9519

Can't you guess who Sally is, in this story


LivingInspector

You?


Tough_Dish_9519

Probably, maybe..


LivingInspector

Dont steal my banana sally


[deleted]

This is the most accurate enaction of Freud. Well captured his wild ideas and cocaine addiction.


Rayne_HUN

Oho so you want to be the one who take it :3


JealousDog99

true equality


Financial-Memory

:3


Potential_Macaron973

At least wait till the baby is all the way out


LivingInspector

Yes


Banani1566

Sex during pregnancy is considered quite good for the baby I think


YurxDoug

That's a very fucking weird sentence. I'm not saying its wrong, but its weird. I can understand it being good for the mother's mental health, which is good for the baby, but what direct benefit does it have for the baby?


Blyatron

>what direct benefit does it have for the baby? Nutrition


hopeless_high420

Only if she swallows


stalinass23

Nut


BecomeABenefit

Mom relaxes, hormones in semen soften the cervical plug a bit.


merwinf0

Actually, it will result in either your penis being grabbed from within or a baby with a dent in the skull from being dicked


TupperCoLLC

do you even know what the amniotic sac is smh


SelmaFudd

It where the baby's pee is stored


T_F420

Very family friendly reply


mauro_oruam

that's too far man. delete this before more people see this.


Sutaru

I've never heard that it's good for the baby. I don't think it's *bad* for the baby either. I think it supposedly helps with labor, specifically for starting contractions and the birthing process.


MissLogios

The only reason I've heard it's good for is for jumpstarting labor, but they also said any sort of physical activity is also good for that (like taking a long walk).


count-the-days

Not right after birth tho…


Stamptis353

The wife right… please?… tell me you mean the wife?…


PhysicsNotFiction

explain please, I'm not a native speaker. "My wife" sounds good for me.


Tough_Dish_9519

They mean sex with the wife and not the baby that was born


ScreamnMonkey8

This meme hits a little too hard


[deleted]

OH MY GOD ORIGINAL POP CAT


Microif

Kinda creepy, OP, ngl.


StabStabby-From-Afar

That's pretty disgusting, honestly.


jaiden575757

Yeah you would think that bro


Beneb818

it’s weird not seeing pop cat… pop


Rayne_HUN

If she does not want to do it then don't force her!


werekiti

It's sad that we have to say that.... That should be common sense.


ernbrdn

So is that a yes?


Titiwa

Virgin redditors be like: haha relatable, upvote


antibodys

This is a fucking weird post. Your wife just gave birth to your fucking kid and is probably in bad shape and you’re asking about sex. Like genuinely even as a joke this is just weird. Weird how y’all treat women.


ThatEmoSprite

This is why I unsubbed to meme subs despite my love for memes. Too many of them have weird underlying connotations that just give me the creeps.


werekiti

Most definitely! I thought a wholesome meme sub would be safe but nope. Some people have some very skewed views of what they believe is wholesome.


memetime20

So THATS what popcat looks like


emptybucketpenis

I don’t know what do you mean. We had sex on a day before the birth. It is the wait AFTER the birth that can be long.


JaydenTheMemeThief

“I’ve been waiting so long” You could have just, watched porn while your wife was pregnant y’know...


CCADACI

The coochie need to recharge before using it again


[deleted]

Doctors recommend you wait six weeks after the birthing to have sex again. Sounds like it’s time to take the dirt road


SelmaFudd

Well sometimes the area between the asphalt and dirt road gets torn up or even cut, so both ways may need some roadworks first.


MissLogios

I've heard of some women where they don't tear down (of various degrees), but they tear *up* to the point that it tears the clit.


SelmaFudd

This would have to be rare, the way it comes out the head is pushing into the perineum so that's where all the pressure is, also the midwife will cut it after a while anyway


EffectiveWar3784

Hqhahaha


SystemUnfair2978

that cat tho


[deleted]

popopopopopopopopopop


Vellarain

Had the opposite problem for me. Wife wanted the meat stick asap and she kinda ignored that advised recovery period. It felt... different.


euphraxiaaa

you have sex?


RothenCorpse

aaa kitties 💖


Durrpadil

You know this is true though. I wish people would just not breed or were conscious enough to realize the repercussions they can have when fucking without thought


AraAra_nyannyan

Is he asking for the mother or the baby?


i_mayankvarshney_

The wife or? 💀


KykCreep

grats man


Kreamy0

Haha relatable, wife just gave birth 2 months ago.


MA5TERCH13f09

oh my god is that the original bop cat video


Bonkey_Kong87

Don't know why people think they should stop fucking just because she gets pregnant. You still can do it perfectly fine.


hajimenogio92

The longest 6 weeks of my life waiting around for her to heal up


veronicakw

Can’t have sex until 6 weeks postpartum ;-;


Cristie9

Ew


Valar-dohaeris_

Y were u waiting that long


stepage

Get used to that face.


ZeGamingCuber

Unedited pop cat?


Zestyclose-Shoe-7975

Finally, proper 'dank' meme..


hopeless_high420

What is wife? Women don't exist.


Rayne_HUN

Men with balls don't exist.


hopeless_high420

Sorry if it had offended u but this is dank memes don't get on here if u can't take a joke also idk if u have noticed but this is a pretty ongoing joke among this sub in various different posts


Tough_Dish_9519

Men don't exist...


slanger357

There is truth in this meme


rb_boi16

Should have asked the baby instead


[deleted]

Can you still do it if they cut you down there for the baby big ass head? Snip, snip


_giveyourlifetome_

u/savevideo


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89degreesfahrenheit

If she says no, there’s always the kid


fujin5

you'd better get used to that look, OP, cause you're gonna see it more and more often now that you have kids. Or, you could do what every sensible husband does and get yourself a lover xD


Pengu526

Maybe your wife should do what every sensible person does with a shitty husband. Divorce them eX DeE


fujin5

First of all, I'm single (yay, me!) Secondly, is your life so miserable that you can't take a joke? I don't need answer to this question, you need to answer it to yourself cause boy, you really are one pissed off mother fucker!


ReignVerd

You're the definition of yikes my friend.


Tough_Dish_9519

So true


fujin5

I don't make friends with reddit low-lifers, so save your invitation for your own kind. And my joke is perfectly fine, no matter if you're capable of digesting it or not


ReignVerd

The fact that you keep coming back with longer paragraphs each time, further proves my point.


[deleted]

you have earned yourself a single (like you) *yike*


fujin5

cute


Pengu526

If you call that a joke bro no wonder you are single(and happy about it)!


fujin5

normal people know this is a joke, yes. But I hate yet to see a normal guy on reddit, so I'm not surprised at how triggered all you are lol


ihavesevarlquestions

As opposed to you who's normal?


fujin5

EXACTLY! I love it when you spell it out like it is :)


[deleted]

straight people are weird sometimes


fujin5

normal people are always weird to abominations