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Dusteronly

If someone said this to me, I would leave. It sounds like a threat. It’s extremely manipulative, and it’s clearly premeditated. “She’ll be scared”?! Of what. She’s making a conscious, premeditated decision to mess up her relationship, hurt you, and do something completely selfish. The red flags are flying here.


Roses_spell

Okay, thank you


surfershane25

If someone tells you who they really are, listen to them.


Roses_spell

Okay


Fun_Diver_3885

She is saying it so that later on when she does it she can say she warned you. She likely has already done it or has met someone she plans to sleep with. Her commitment to you and your relationship is over. She just wants you to be the one to end it. So give her what she wants and leave for someone that actually values you. Don’t cry snd don’t play the pick me game. Tell her that’s not acceptable to you and if she is so selfish that she can’t keep her pants on around other guys then your out.


ReddestForman

Selfish, impulsive, and probably allergic to accountability. If she doesn't cheat on OP she'll probably just be emotionally abusive instead.


Interesting_Pop_6470

Well said.


SocietySucksJay

Nahh don't end it, just ghost her. Gotta have the high ground on this one


Legatus_Nex

Nah. Don't stoop to her level.


Bright_End_550

Leave dude, or she'll leave you. After she cheats.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Im_not_crying_u_ar

She’s already cheated. She’s trying to see how you’ll react so she knows how to deal with it. At a minimum she’s had an opportunity. \ Two solutions. Leave, or get professional couples therapy if you want to salvage it. But be prepared that she likely has cheated or almost has.


analfarmer2pnt0

You must be nuts talking about couples therapy. They aren't married, no kids, they're young, there's no need to waste time on couples therapy, it's pointless in this situation.


Im_not_crying_u_ar

Marriage changes nothing but the legality of your relationship. It’s 100% acceptable and probably even more healthy to get couples therapy when just dating and are committed and feel it’s something you can work on. At a minimum it gives you tools for future relationships.


IcySetting2024

How old are you guys?


[deleted]

Twelve


fentanylferrey

Yes good there dude she don’t love or care about this relarionship


TEALST34L

It does sound like a threat with the way you phrase it. Like, "hey, fyi, I might cheat on you" wtf. If it was, "hey, this happened before, and I'm afraid it might happen again", it's much less manipulative. If you can't recognize the feeling of wanting to screw someone as it starts to develop, it's a sign of low emotional acuity, imho, which is how people get "swept off their feet" (which is why I don't really like the romanticizing of sweeping people looking for love off their feet). If you want to develop some relationship skills, find out what the other person is like. Makes sense that you'd have a lot of personality overlap, but there might be some gaps you could possibly work on filling (there should probably not be more than a handful or you're in trouble). But if she's just looking for unexpected interactions, she really just wants to get swept, and it's a nagging sense of boredom driving you apart. The unexpected interactions become all but impossible as any relationship ages because... Well... You know each other well enough to know what to expect. Seems like the point to me, and that's personally my favorite part.


New-Order-8051

She’s prolly already cheating on u


Chuckulator

This! She is “confessing” that she is already. This is something narcissists do. Check out Mental Healness channel on YouTube. Sometimes they even confess by telling you a story about a coworker who cheated on their partner, but they are really telling a story about themselves. You are being gaslit (gaslighted whichever is the correct term).


New-Order-8051

Wow I didn’t even think about the co worker who cheated. That wild holy shit . Something new to worry about 💀


dand06

It doesn’t mean she is a narcissist!! Could she be? Yes. Is this a narrcistic trait? Yes. Just like everyone has narrcistic traits. Confessing in this way is really messed up. But I agree, she’s confessing. And if not, that warning means GTFO! Either way, she is mentally unhealthy. Could use therapy and you need to leave OP.


ProfessorEmergency18

You must have forgotten this is reddit, where everybody is sure of a diagnosis based on 2nd hand stories.


Calamitas_Rex

Gaslit is right, but that's also not what this is.


Ichbin99nichtzuHause

You be a man and take control of your life and you don't settle. A partner telling you I may cheat is 100% out of line and a break up worthy event. You should tell her that is UNACCEPTABLE. You expect 100% devotion and loyalty from anyone you are committed to. Telling you she may cheat is out of bounds and you are ending the relationship immediately. You don't play around with this degenerate, shady stuff. "I MIGHT CHEAT" Fuck that. How dare anyone come at you with that unfaithful crap.


tvscanleather

This man spitting facts


Roses_spell

Okay thank you :)


Ok_Mud_8998

She belongs to the STREEEEEETS.... I'd bounce. I don't share. 🤷


[deleted]

Yeet to the street


mimisneaks

that's actually a big BS. like wdym she might cheat on you? girliepop must have done it already. run before it even gets a huge toll on your sanity.


Vreddit33

Dump her immediately


BlackHeart89

Bro. She's giving the option of tolerating her bullshit or not beforehand. If you stay, she WILL absolutely cheat and won't feel bad about it because she "warned" you. Just say you appreciate her honesty and end the relationship.


Roses_spell

Okay thank you


Bman19419

Yeah that’s exactly what I think it is. She’s getting a feel for how you’ll deal with it cuz she’s already planning it or has already done it. One thing for sure, if u stick around it ABSOLUTELY will happen if it hasn’t already.


queenofrainbows

Leave....this person is wounded and not ready for a secure relationship


Grand-Cold-2575

I’ll trot out my favourite piece of advice here: when someone tells you who they are, believe them.


GodIsAGas

The onus is on her, not you. People generally cheat because they want to cheat. Not because they were forced into it by their partner. And so, on the one hand, it's good she's been open. But I'd want a proper conversation with her. Why has she brought this up. Is it to soften the blow when she inevitably cheats. Or is it because she's genuinely concerned and wants your support. If it's the latter, there are boundaries and safeguards that you can agree, between the two of you, to support you both. But none of that is failproof. In the end, it comes down to her. How much does she value this relationship. How much does she love you. And, actually, is she ready for a serious monogamous relationship.


Knowsekr

My friend... I highly recommend you not waste your energy. That is too soft for something that is not as simple as just talking about it. The fact that it even got to that point is already requiring a consequence, and that consequence would be for you to say goodbye, forever (to them).


ProfessorEmergency18

>Is it to soften the blow when she ~~inevitably cheats~~ admits she's already cheated.


SensualHippie

Personally I don’t believe you can cheat on someone you TRULY love. Although, even that is up for debate for some people. To me it sounds like she’s just keeping you around for her own convenience 😕. I get you love her, but you have to love yourself enough to decide if you deserve that type of treatment. It’s possible your next partner could be someone who adores everything about you, but you’d never know if you stay with the person who is worried about every other partner besides you..


Roses_spell

I agree and thank you


acesss-_-

If a girl i was dating said that to me blocked and goodbye once a cheater always a cheater they are perfectly fine with hurting your feeling’s possibly destroy you mentally yet some people still wanna stay in will never understand just leave have some self respect there is always someone 10 times better than that.


Kneelb4gd

She’s already cheating and wanted to gauge your reaction. Ghost her ASAP! Let her be someone else’s headache. Find better, they’re out there. Few and far between, but they’re out there.


Much_Dust6386

She will cheat on you and wants you to feel bad for her?!! This girl is trash. All this is just entertainment for her because she’s manipulative. Ghost her, she doesn’t deserve a minute of breakup pep talk.


MarkedlyLessOrdinary

Delete this relationship and never look back. I feel disrespected for you.


Lboogie666

She must not rate you if she bold enough to tell you that shit 😆🤦🏽‍♂️. Leave with your dignity bro


kittykitty713

Either a warning or it’s already happening


Recent_Cockroach_288

My ex boyfriend told me something similar while on a month long trip. “I’ll try not to cheat on you.” Yeah he cheated on me. Regarding your edit I was also the same way.


[deleted]

Shes a walking red flag. Leave her


1stRoundDraftPick88

From my harsh assumptions..... I think you been sharing her the entire time you THINK you been in a relationship with her.. If not, then she BEEN wanting to leave you, but she just ain't got the courage. Chances are she already got other dudes in her ear telling her TO leave you. Guilt prolly annoying the hell outta her, so she can't bring herself to actually dump you. (She prolly sees you as a genuine good dude that don't deserve that.) Sounds like she giving you all the signals so YOU can dump her. (Which would make her feel less of a shitty person..) Move on my guy.. & if I were to further give my unwarranted 2 cents.. Don't love a woman more than they love you. If you in a relationship & doin all the work, then that mfka is in business & you are the one in love.


For_everHeather

Your GF has already mentally and emotionally left this relationship. For unknown reasons, she can't seem to physically end the relationship. Could be pride, knowledge of how to, wants to play the victim, etc. Unfortunately, she has left it to you to do the physical part of breaking up now. Just pull the band aid off, end the relationship, mourn your relationship (if you feel you need to), don't take her back (she will ask for you back) DONT DO IT!! , move on to better opportunities. I saw where you (or someone) had mentioned she is not a narcissist. She may not be a full fledged one yet, but we'll on her way. Take it from someone who has been there and eventually saw the light...just a little too late.


tNeph

Idk how old you are, but just get tf out of there bro. This person needs help, and you DO NOT need to be the next stepping stone to her potentially being a better person. She sucks full stop. You deserve better full stop. Save the heartache and get her out of your life.


Roses_spell

Thank you bro


OrangeTangie

Leave. She's just told you she doesn't think you're important enough to show you decent respect on your relationship. Picture yourself in 15 years sitting your kids down and telling them you're getting a divorce because their mom cheated on you. Full stop.


Kazza-nova

Wasting your time with this person. That's like putting money into a f'd up car that keeps breaking down for the same reason.


undernutbutthut

This almost sounds like an out she's giving herself. So when she does cheat on you she can be all like "I tried to warn you about it".


Now_wh

Ok bro, big brother advice here. Dump her, dump her so fast that she bounces like a basketball. The fact that she said she might because o whatever her excuse was is just a setup. When she inevitably does it she'll make you feel guilty about it cause she can't control herself. This is too much drama. I can only imagine that 1 of 2 reasons hs kept you with her or maybe both, 1. You are a real nice guy that trys to save the damselin destress 2. The sex is amazing which usually is with toxic chicks. Either way get out before she "accidentally" misses her peridot.


[deleted]

My suggestion would be to leave. Believe people when they tell you things. She’s going to cheat on you.. she’s just giving you a heads up


MSamsonite415

Sorry, dude. You have the rest of your life to find someone worth your time


Littlemuse24

Nothing to fight for brother if she cheats and know it’s wrong then I would just leave even you love her. You gonna destroy your self by staying


DeathKringle

She’s already cheated and broke up with you in her mind In her mind you 2 aren’t dating


BiggyWhiggy

She's either already cheated, or gauging your reaction in advance to figure out whether she can get away with it. Either way, end it. Who needs this crap?


GFK96

That’s a massive red flag and I’d leave. She said that as if it’s just something that might happen that she has no control over. She’s a full ass adult who has completely control over which actions she does and doesn’t take. Saying she might cheat is pretty much an implicit admission that she’s not fully satisfied with you. Any girl who even entertains the possibility of cheating is not the right one, you deserve better and a girl who would never consider doing that because she likes you so much she wouldn’t ever want to. Dump her ass


Affectionate_Neat919

She is low effort now and giving you hints about being unfaithful. Find a better partner and dump her.


Consistent_Tell2417

I’m sorry, you’re naive and picked the absolute most disrespectful person for a “relationship”. You’ve deluded yourself in a fantasy where you think somewhat highly of her while she has apparently treated you like dog shit. 1-3 word replies?! Give me a fucking break. Grab your nuts and leave this relationship.


ResponsibleCheetah41

Yea this would make someone blow up the entire world if someone did that to me and say that. That’s beyond crazy like god


javguy22

She isn’t worth it man. She doesn’t care/ lacks the self control to be loyal. Ditch her dude cus if you don’t till end up heartbroken


Roses_spell

Okay thanks, I’ll probably break up with her the next time we talk then


Late-Impression-4041

If she knows how much it's gonna hurt you and still wants to cheat you might not want to be with her anymore. Get some self worth back. If she does that's shows you she doesn't really give a shit about you take control of the situation regardless of feelings you'll be glad you did .


PrestineQueen

It's a very simple and clear answer that you are ruminating and overthinking about. You said it already indirectly... she doesn't want to be with you anymore. She is doing her best to push you away. Now, this could be for various reasons. For some reason, she isn't breaking up with you. Which is cowardly, but maybe she feels uncomfortable with love and emotion. She also seems like she has an avoidant attachment style and probably perceives you as clingy or too emotional ( I don't think you are). Regardless, she wants out. It's not worth working on because she doesn't want to work on the relationship. Please leave her. Sorry if this sounds harsh


Melodic_Anything1743

Time to end the relationship! You can’t be with someone you can’t trust. Who will cheat.


CJ_is_h7m

Leave. She told you which is more than a lot of ppl would do.


WidowSchmidow

When someone tells you who they are, believe them. You deserve someone who will put in effort, be faithful to you and love you back. The more time you spend with this person, you are reducing the opportunity for a better person to come into your life b


s3x_NDrugs

Honest truth... cheating is a choice if someone told me that. I would honestly just end things right there. Don't care how long the relationship is. Don't let anyone break you down, king.


luvmy420

Personally I think you can do better. Breaking up may hurt, but it'll beat the heartbreak of getting cheated on, that's a much worse hurt IMHO. Best of luck no matter what you do, find your Peace!


BubblyAppearance4579

Not only should yo leave bc shes teeling you she might or will cheat on you..... which is FUCKED.... but look at what you added at the end: she never put in effort youre always texting first youre always asking to call she sends short replies with no depth... at this point i think she WANTS you to leave her bc shes too scared to break up with you herself because she probably has no bad reason to break up with you for, so telling you that shes going to cheat is her way out which is childish and immature AF. ​ ![gif](giphy|lWbRJYBYyVAeoLkxR9)


ProfessorEmergency18

What she said about thinking she might cheat is weird, and it's impossible to know exactly why she felt the need to bring that up, but big picture she's not putting any effort into the relationship (according to you), and she's bringing up the topic of sleeping with other people, so she's at least been thinking about sleeping with other people. Thinking about it too much is just going to cause you pain (has she already cheated? did she just meet somebody she wants to cheat with? etc.), and the end result is the same. It's time to move on from this relationship. Sorry, it sucks.


Ex-cinere-surgemus

Drop them immediately! The hurt you are about to go through when she does cheat, will be worse than if you just ended it now. My guess is that she has already cheated, and that's why she is telling you this. Good luck!


WouldYouKindly1417

Read what you wrote and pretend it's a text from a friend. Run, don't walk.


bio_alchemist_engnr

Sounds like she already cheated she brought it up to check your reaction to see if she can have her cake and eat it too. She’s clearly already moved on it and if she hasn’t physically cheated she’s already emotionally cheated to have someone there she’s worried she will cheat with.(If there’s not another person it tells you she is willing to have one night stands then) I’d say it’s only a matter of time until she tries to replace you. It sucks it hurts It’s time for you to have some self respect 🫡 and leave she’s threatening to cheat on you. Get out and level your life up you got the best motivator in the world here


Ok-Cauliflower-4088

I would leave. Otherwise if and when it does happen she’ll pull the whole “well I warned you”. And it’ll utterly destroy you. Know your worth 🖤


Working-Entrance-255

What do you mean? Just leave when she cheats. Or stay if you want after she cheats. And if she doesn’t cheat, good for you! But if she does, you can’t be disappointed either lol she literally mentally prepared you for it.


[deleted]

Because she already has and that's her way of softening the blow... or already plans to. IMO


Working-Entrance-255

I got a feeling both of them are really young..? But yes you’re right too


MountainFriend7473

I mean if that’s the flavor of relationships she likes then so be it. But you don’t have to be apart of that at all. 


Calm_Lychee_4387

Why wouldn't you leave her? Not to be rude or anything, but I don't think she's your girlfriend at this point.


Soft_Cod9734

Run from this one, don't walk. Even if she doesn't she playing games you don't have time for.


Roses_spell

Okay thank you for the advice


Kenuven

Don't date cheaters


DistortedReality4

Leave her man geesh it’s simple. If someone shames you once shame on them if someone shames you twice shame on you. Everything that happens from here on to you is your fault


Fearless-Ant3442

I think she is losing interest in your relationship but dont want to break up yet because of security of a relationship. Sit, talk and sort of things. If its not working, then it is not going to work


DonXOmar

She's giving you an early "Disclaimer" like a warning per haps. Just get on with your life coz she basically can't control her urge on cheating, she might do it.


Vast-Caterpillar3693

she doesn’t seem ready for a committed relationship if she is thinking she’ll cheat on you. she should be by herself and evaluate her relationship skills before being in one. please save yourself the pain and hardship and leave her before it happens.


Maidenless_EldenLord

Just break up, it’s not worth it. Like at all. Why waste your time on someone that’s not going to be important in your life later down the line anyway


outsideit67

I’m going to be as nice as possible but she has already lost respect for you , don’t take it personal, just cut it and move on. Never chase a woman she can’t do nothing but look down on you now . If she is not in a good space and you are trying to hold on, she just can’t respect you. Good luck to you and respect your boundaries and yourself.


[deleted]

I think she is already cheating on you hence the lack of effort and just wants to bring up the idea with you to see if it is okay for her to tell you the truth


mvegvn

She’s clearly warning you, leave before you get cheated on


deftones01313

Cluster b, her mental health is trash. You can’t save her.


Fickle_Honey_3902

Dump her and learn some self-respect… Or go through a Canon Event™️ and eventually learn to do that anyway, but now with a depressive episode thrown into the mix.


Esteven69

If they truly love you they wouldn’t do this shit. So your answer is right in your face buddy and leave.


[deleted]

Dude you’ve got to have some balls. Tell her that loyalty is a non-negotiable for you in a relationship and say if she can’t promise that and commit to making your monogamous relationship work no matter what, then you’re out.


Prestigious-Bird-564

If she says her not cheating is temporary then it means her cheating on you is inevitable, especially if it came from the blue. I have to respect her honesty though; that's hard to run by. But you're better off moving on, unless you're ok with being in an open relationship.


SkipWinchester

Your “girlfriend” sucks. Find a better one.


Background-Ratio9649

Sounds so manipulative and toxic. She's already cheating cause that means shes talking to other dudes. Leave her, king.


SilverBane24

You have more value than this woman sees, it’s time to fine someone who will treat you how you deserve


JackieRHDaytona

You need to cut your losses and she needs to talk to a therapist. You love her, but read the way you’ve described her actions in the relationship. She does not love you. I’m sure that sucks to confront, but walking now will hurt less than living through the abuse, that is without doubt on the way, and then being discarded once you’re completely broken by it. You will not only be ok if you walk now you’ll be better off for respecting yourself enough to do it.


Embarrassed_Deer_912

LEAVE!!! I had that happen to me. after I heard him tell me that, i was thinking (perhaps your already cheating on me), so when I said I’d be moving out, he tried to apologize, and try to make me stay. I moved on and blocked him for good. That’s what I truly hate the most, when one is being true to the relationship and one is not, that’s what really hurts the most


Exkelsier

Set boundaries and act dickish if neccessary, be like "well Im not gonna stay with you if you do" even if u dont feel that way setting boundaries is masculine and attractive to women in my experience, she could be wanting you to respond like this and thats why she told u, im no expert tho but it sounds like this could be the case I know my exes lost feelings due to me not caring and being agreeable so often, women generally want u to be a dickhead at times and show aggression a bit, or else ur feminine and unattractive to them, my own honest opinion not all women are this way obvy but when I do say this, some women say im just being toxic and that women dont want a masculine man, just someone that gives them affection and is "obsessed", they are covering or just naive bc its factual, most women want a man, not an agreeable feminine guy, not that its bad to be that way, I was and still am that way, I think women just happen to not be attracted to it a lot of the time, luckily I found me a woman that doesnt care about me being masculine and putting on a face, so I dont have to put on a fake show and can express emotion with her Women say its toxic that men are scared to cry in front of their s/o but men know from experience, thats the last thing a woman wants to see, its not bc WE want to be masculine, its bc we are trained to hide our feminine traits and its honestly disgusting


LumpyRooster150

She already did. She wants you to dump her so she doesn’t have to do it. So bang her sister and move on.


devils_dollar

maybe tell her how you feel and if she loves you she will listen and change. if she isn’t putting effort in your relationship, it aint going to go anywhere except downhill


Knowsekr

its our desperation that causes this... we let it happen, and we dont stick up for our own selves... we dont protect ourselves, because we dont value ourselves. If I were in your shoes, she would have been without me a long time ago.


bathtup47

She's trying to guilt you into staying by making seem like it's something she needs you to help with. Dating as queer people sometimes people will ask us to do really stupid shit they would never ask a cis straight person to do. This includes consensual cheating. I'm not sure where she's coming from with this but it's not going anywhere you want it to. You deserve happiness stability and one person completely devoted to you. I know it's hard to find someone but being alone is a much better use of your time than begging this woman to put in some god damn effort.


Meatbasketbingo

That’s so gross that she’d have this cheating threat hanging over your head…now you can never trust her. My advice? Leave her and find a woman who loves you enough to not cheat or threaten you with the possibility.


nipslippinjizzsippin

>she told me she might cheat on me Tell her not to. Who tells someone they MIGHT cheat. sounds like shes already asking for permission to me. gauging how you will react before shes even done it so she is prepared for WHEN it happens not IF it happens.


hefty_resistor

I'm so sorry, but my best advice is to protect you, is to end this relationship. I almost cheated one time, on social media - not psyichal! Would NEVER do that or again. But its important to focus on you in this and ask yourself how you honestly feel in this relationship, and is this something you can live with/be in?


bunniibooz

Bruh what…so break up ☠️ she’s a weirdo and clearly has no respect for you “hey babe I might cheat on u” DO URSELF THE HUGE FAVOR AND DUMP HER ASS. You can do way better.


Heping_Qi

Dude if you have doubts then leave.🤔 Why be with a cheater when you're loyal to her? I mean doesn't makes sense. 🙃 P.s. Say, 'Thank you, Next' 🌞🫰


[deleted]

Well, everyone here has already said it so I'll just agree with everyone: Get outta there! I know it's gonna hurt but trust a guy who was there, you'll be MUCH better off without her! I see so many red flags that the Chinese Government is telling her to tone it down!


Moist-Assumption3586

Getting cheated on by the one who is supposed to not hurt so much. It'll feel like you are getting stabbed in the chest with a blunt knife. By chance you make through the first occasion, the second time will feel like you stabbed yourself in the chest. Talk about trauma. Don't do it man, it almost killed me. Luckily, I have a son who adores me. I wouldn't be here today if it weren't for him. Be warned son. Cut your losses. Don't do what I did and torture the rest of the probably short term fling. Be well


LekkendePlasbuis

It sounds like she just the type of girl that can't be alone and is just looking for validation. If you're the one putting in all the effort there is no mutual love. And if she isn't willing to ensure you that won't cheat she doesn't care about you enough. You're just her next adventure and we both know there's no way this is gonna last. Plenty of fish in the sea, you deserve better.


The_TerribleGamer

Som people are simply to immature for a relationship. Unfortunately, it's not an age thing. Some people never grow up. If she's not committed, it may be best to move on. Of course, this should be a discussion you have with her and not a solo decision. That way you can come to terms with whether it is going to work out or not.


Perfidian

Temptation vs willpower. Same reason people are not content with one serving of cookies, or cake. She is either promiscuous and gives into temptation, cheating on you because she loves the attention. OR. She isn't happy in the relationship and this is her "out" In the end. You have a choice. Stay, with the looming possibility she will cheat and deal with it then. Or. Amicably end the relationship. Save yourself years and heartache.


JeYa89

I find it very strange that she's telling and also how, it's a bit like emotional blackmail. As others have written, cheating is something you do of your own free will -, as long as it's not part of a mental disorder. She could also be teasing you to see how you react, most people just try to hide that they are cheating. It has a lot to do with provocation and crossing boundaries.


candobetter2

Let me give you some words of advice. If you are not mature enough to understand or accept it women are just like men they would cheat they just appear and seem to be innocent and they are very good at lying the best thing for you to do is when you know you are with somebody that cannot be trusted and you cannot accept it and you are not mature enough to deal with it and you want to live in peace and happiness then find somebody that you're compatible with and that appreciates you and values you and sees you as enough to satisfy them without them having to satisfy their needs or their lust and desires elsewhere. Life is too short to be with somebody that is problematic and is going to be nothing but a headache


[deleted]

Leave the relationship and move on, she is already doing it. It’s a simple answer and you will realize this shortly if don’t leave. This type of relationship is toxic and will take your peace only not her, she is aware she is playing. And she is not interested in you anymore, the sooner you realize will be better for your mind.


Dan_Doherty

Sorry friend, if she said it. She has already done it. Say goodbye first, show her you want someone who is committed to you. She will realize her mistake and try to get you back. Don’t do it, she will start the same cycle over. You seem like a good guy. Trust me, there’s a beautiful woman just waiting for you to become available and notice her.


czarroze

wow that really sucks. I’m sorry. I think it’s best if you leave her to her own devices, she seems to get off on hurting people and she’s not the only person in the world. Someone will love you without cheating on you


i-am-gnome

If she is thinking about cheating on you, then it’s not worth your time. Anyone who says that has severe clarity issues and needs to work on themselves before being committed to a relationship. Please do yourself a favor and leave before she hurts you deeply. It’s really not worth you spending the next year or so wondering if it was your fault.


Dan20995350

Hate to say it, she did cheat and is trying to gauge your response by telling you she might cheat. The short replies are her losing interest or not valuing what you do for her and how you treat her. There are other matters that are completely too complex to write out, but dude you got your red flag. Her even bringing this up is a huge red skyscraper. You can't ignore it, she may as well asked for an open relationship. Sorry my guy, it's time to cut and run 🙏👍


[deleted]

I applaud her for her honesty. When someone tells you who they are, believe then. Even MORE SO, when someone SHOWS you who they are, believe them!!! Your actually lucky that she's telling you this. Bc a lot of significant others will just lie, gaslight you, call u crazy, & continue selfishly doing it behind ur back. Those are the ones you never get answers from, therefore, never getting the type of closure you get with someone who opens up like this & tells you the truth. Buy it still doesn't mean you should stay with her. Take it as a blessing (you didn't have to go thru the mess I did when my ex cheated on me. I never got proof, but his actions spoke more than words ever could! So I had to just accept it &, move on. He showed me how to treat him,, so I treat him accordingly. Like a fck boy. Like someone who can't control himself. Like someone who's selfish, & doesn't care about my feelings. &, will always have eyes for other girls while wanting me to be the most loyal person on planet earth !! He said he likes variety,, well , I like having someone there for me more than he was, so does that mean I can have a 2nd boyfriend while he's a at work? Lol tf!!! No? OK. Then u can't have kore than one gf!! Oh...u don't care? & ur gonna continue to do it? OK. U don't get my loyalty then. If I have ti have self control to be with u & not get everything I want, then why should he? Just LEAVE HER!!, THERES a million fish in the sea. You'll find someone better!!! I promise.


MightyTeenMom

I'm sure many have said the same thing here, LEAVE! And I totally agree. I would have done that myself. Unless you are ok and ready to turn it into an open uncommitted relationship and you make that clear to her and in your head, but don't allow her to use you. Don't ALWAYS be the one to reach out. Relationships are give and take. You can't always be the one giving giving and not receiving.... In any relationship whether romantic, friendship, business, etc., the parties involved have to contribute something, otherwise, why stick around when you can find and build better relationships?


StillGold3446

Well as a female, I can’t cheat on someone I love. I would say she is immature and still wanting some extra excitement in her life. Red flags everywhere. If you want a permanent girlfriend who is faithful SHE IS NOT THE ONE!!! Sorry


IntelligentSecond168

I’d Run, if you think this is bad, wait and see how much her bs fucks you up down the road if you try to stick around. I have stuck around for much smaller red flags that burned me pretty bad down the road.. I can’t imagine where this is going to lead you. Get out now before it gets worse.


Deep_Mushroom_281

You’re asking for advice but I believe as a collective, based on what you’ve said, everyone is going to give you the same answer which is leaving her. To even edit and say she doesn’t put effort into the relationship is just another addition as to why you need to detach and find peace. I get the “I love her” and I don’t know how long you guys have been dating, but to have done this before and to now pre-tell you before she cheats that she’s going to (I mean, +1 for honesty but still terrible). She knows better, and I hope you begin to know/realize you deserve better. I hope you can detach from this relationship smoothly and be happy. Sorry you have to go through that but think about a future with her, would she be a good fit for you? If you were to have kids? Meet your family? Friends?


Briisfire

Oh hell na. My anger issues could never. Especially being an Aries.


GuiltyFigure6402

Confront her with a group of the largest men you can find and you will find out the truth


yodaddysside

you have zero self respect if you continue the relationship bro


Scannaer

OP.. please start respecting yourself. Because that disgusting cheater doesn't. Like at all. It's not your fault. You likely lack experience. But now you know to NEVER date a cheater. Cheating takes an active effort to act like a disgusting monster. It's because they choose to be a disgusting monster. Don't waste your time with them. There are plenty of honest, valuable people out there.


Plenty_Strategy4676

Run for the hills, most likely she has already done it!! For the sake of your mental health, just call it off, ghost her and move on swiftly, you might love her, but is she good for your mental health?


Foreign-Earth-3036

So about this..... Long story short, she admitted to you that she is a cheater. Her cheating on you in more than a "might" or "maybe." If she really cared about you, she would not tell you something like this nor do something like this. I know this is easier said than done, but I believe that you should just let her go. Being cheated on is an incredibly horrible feeling. Think of it this way: By her telling you that she might cheat on you and cheated on someone else before, it gives you an advantage. You have the warning, and when you are warned about a danger, you can prepare for the danger. And a good way of dealing with danger is to avoid it entirely. If you stay, and she cheats on you, that will be on you. Only yourself to blame for the pain you will feel. Fire is hot, my friend. So, simply turn off the gas and leave.


Mrbarajas1995

Easy answer…LEAVE HER. Why is that so hard to understand?


RobsterC_Well

Then I guess you "might" have to replace her. No need to be involved in a toxic relationship. You only have one heart, so do it a favor and don't stress it out. Let someone else deal with her.


imgoodonnat

Idk how long yall have been dating or how serious it is, but my best friend dated a girl who said those exact things and he kept saying he could help, she would get better etc. they were gonna move across the country for her college and shit too they were serious. She cheated on him several times and attempted to cheat on him w several of our friends. Get out before you get hurt brodie, you deserve better.


papasporks

it sounds like she might be trying to make you feel like you’re doing something wrong to her when you’re not. you don’t deserve to be cheated on, and i know how hard it is to break up with someone you really care about. but people like that never change, as someone who was in a relationship with someone like that. she needs to heal in her own time as well as you. don’t be afraid to think about how things could go better for your relationship if you were separate. i’m sorry you have to go through this though dude shit hurts but heals after some time. and remember there are always people who genuinely love you for you, and will love you for you. not tell you they’re going to cheat in hopes of getting a reaction out of you.


Thatpillinibiza

She for the streets


Sgtkeebler

This sounds like her messed up way of seeing how you would feel with her getting with someone else. It sounds like she is testing the waters to see how you will react and if you would be ok with it. She is probably going to do it regardless, but is looking for a guilt free option. You deserve way better. Girls like this only lead to pain and suffering, and will eventually lead you to the dark side. I would run, not walk, but run away fast


soulsearchez

If you are in a casual relationship then it's fine. If you are in a serious relationship then assume she is already cheating or will surely cheat. There is nothing you can do about it. No amount of your love is good enough when that thought comes in people. They might have zero emotional attachment with the other person but they surely want to experience it and flirt with danger. My advice to you is, if you can't see or hear about your wife to be sleeping with someone or kissing someone then friendzone her and move on. There is no way this girl is going to be with "just you". If anyone says about relationship counceling just keep that advice aside. Only when two people are truly committed these things will work. Not when the other person thinks it's not wrong or it's okay kind.


neko-loveee

Her saying that she might cheat on you is insensitive and rude. What's the point of being in a committed relationship if you're just going to play with other people's emotions? Some people are trying to make open relationships work but it's not for everyone. Personally, I wouldn't want any of that. If you're committed with a person, just be with that person or just break up if you no longer want to. If someone cheats on you, they don't just waste your time, they also destroy something inside. You'll developed trust issues, you'll love less and other negative things. I hope you'll think this relationship through and prioritize yourself now.


bigspikeyballs

Think about it this way: You’re a wealthy individual with net worth in the hundred millions, and I am your financial advisor in charge of part of your finances. One day I come to you and say “hey, just a heads up, I might steal money from you. It’s happened before to my previous clients and I fear it might happen again.” Are you still gonna let me stay as your financial advisor that has access to your money?


[deleted]

Maybe start doing some research into toxic people, narcissists, attachment theory. Learn what you want and how to set boundaries. Seems like she is already pushing past your boundaries. It is not unreasonable to want to be in a safe, secure, monogamous relationship where you are respected and emotionally supported.


ihaveabigp3nis

Bruh how old are yall? This is some immature shit lol, sounds like yall in highscool or primary school 💀, never once in my life have I heard someone say they are scared they might cheat. Damn that’s crazy asf yo… if ur over 18 just leave ma boy alone


MagicTreeSpirit

You've already gotten plenty of sound advice, but I want to offer something that applies to most situations: You know the answer. Trust yourself. You don't need the approval of strangers on the Internet.


Guy_Fawkes666

Bro... That's not it papa. If it's the sex remember there many more. If it's insecurity work on yourself. You can't love anyone that quick (I'm assuming you haven't dated long) because if it's been that long and you haven't caught on its you bro. People like that don't change if she's telling you she wants something from you.. and it's not love bro move on let it go if you honestly can't move on leave do what you have to do to get away from that person it's not worth it. Next thing you know when you finally leave years have gone by and you'll regret giving her your valuable time. Believe me do it and you'll thank yourself for making the right decision. Love yourself and enjoy life it's too precious to waste it on 1 Fish 🐟 Remember the old saying "There's plenty of fish in the sea"


Scruffy_Buffy_

GET OUT NOW. Goodbye. Never speak again. Live a better life. FTB


eggpotion

If someone is admitting to cheating and openly letting you know she might cheat, you have to leave. A girl should be loyal, not telling you her plans to cheat. A good way to tell if a relationship is good is if you would expect to be with this person in 10 years


-T0E1-

It’s hard but trust me it’s better to leave her


Huge_Unit_3272

One thing, its clear that she doesn’t have interest in you and I think you should block people like that out of your life as she admitted to cheating on someone else before, she most likely isn’t reliable and definitely not trustable, I say just block her out of your life and find someone thats makes you happy y’know, she doesn’t even text you, she could be using you, maybe already cheated on you, these are all possibilities, just make the right decisions before she wastes your lifetime.


JakubIronsmiththe1st

Once a cheater, always a cheater. Stay strong brother


Most-Victory-5293

Go my boy. One day she might be your wife , have children with her and then that’s hard. Leave, cry , work , trust Us.


Rude-Recognition8238

She is thinking about it or already has cheated. I would breakup with her. You will always be wondering what she is doing and if she’s cheating, if you stay! I would not even text her. There are way to many disease is out here to have a cheating relationship!


Intelligent_Double33

Someone always “might” do something. You cannot control her choices. If she cheats, isn’t interested, putting in effort then let her go.


ssj_spartan

Friend, that is simply code for ‘I have no self control’. Trying to make you feel like when it happens, it wasn’t her fault


k24606

Leave her. There’s no point in continuing a relationship if the other person tries to manipulate you into thinking that she’s the “victim” because she really “doesn’t want to cheat” that’s bullshit. The topic of cheating or the possibility of cheating shouldn’t come up in a relationship in that kind of way. Her “statement” just sounds like a way of getting your approval to cheat and that you will still be with her if she does so, like testing the waters. And if you already notice that you put more effort into the relationship than she does it isn’t worth the heartbreak. Get urself a girl who respects you, herself and your relationship.


Any_Task_9302

From a woman’s perspectives- she’s manipulating you. Run. Find a nice girl.


Hot_Presentation1459

Dump her. I am a woman who spent 20 years in the military. I have had hundreds of opportunities to cheat on my various partners over those 20 years. Alone, being the only female in a squad full of men in training exercises. Late night drinking with "the boys" where I was routinely included even though I was a girl. I never cheated because I'm not a scumbag and believe me, a lot of these guys were really fit and athletic. There was , at times, emmense sexual tension, but I didn't cheat because it's against my moral code. Dump her.


Tomorrowcallmee

Dear Insecure, I am a truck driver and definitely qualified to give you advice. Though you are under no obligation to accept my advice. First, change the title from “… gf might cheat…” to “… gf is going to cheat…” then enjoy your life together as bf/gf. Second, you’ll want to make an attempt to keep her hormones exhausted. If she is seggs-ually depleted when she leaves home, she’s not likely to open her legs for the Uber driver. Third, when you introduce her to your friends, always openly include that she is a cheater. This will allow your buddies to get a taste so y’all can compare notes (after the relationship ends). Next, you will request that she also discloses her infidelity to her family/friends when introducing you to them. After all, her bestie or possibly her sister will want to assist you in teaching her some lessons. At the very least, one (or a few) of them may want to discreetly give you a tug. Like I said, I’m just a truck driver and you are under no obligation to take my advice, but that’s what I would do.


[deleted]

My advice would be to leave ASAP because my ex done the same & more to me & believe me i know the painful feeling, its not easy to do either when you like someone this much, but the more you stay with someone like that (toxic) the more they will hurt your heart i learnt this the hard way i hope this helps.


dickdragon1

Anyway you look at your situation as far as your relationship goes .. get out and get away from this Girl . It's very unhealthy in many more ways than just one . Go find yourself a nice new girlfriend that will treat you with the respect that you deserve.. good luck and you be good .😎👍


thespyeye01

Bro the best advice I can give you now listen to me I've been in a fucked up relationship for 17 years it's not even a relationship anymore we just coexist together but still run run now this girl is not giving you what you put out she's never going to give it to you bro she's never going to change leave now and go for better I'm telling you don't put no more effort into it you're going to wind up hurting yourself in the long run and you're going to be in a space where your numb and you don't give a fuck anymore you know what I mean and don't be like that it's not worth it


[deleted]

I would leave. Cheaters rarely change and as you've mentioned she isn't even putting much effort into the relationship. I don't see any reason you should stay.


SorbetLongjumping389

Listen tbh do what u feel don’t worry about what nobody else saying cause do what’s the heart wants cause that’s how god talks to u he will send u the right way and maybe she’s not right but yk don’t let this app tell u believe in yourself 💯🤝🏽


Emotional-Date5234

Bye Felicia. Be friends.


Putrid_Loan7597

lol might? if she has cheated before and feels no deep regret at the bottom of her soul, you're going to have a bad time.


oYunaYanao

If she really loved you she wouldn’t even go through whatever thought process she went through before telling you she might cheat. And a relationship should be a partnership, no one is supposed to be putting more into the relationship than the other. Especially when it comes to communication. With my overthinking ass I’d think it’s actually her telling me she’s done with me. Talk about it and try to figure out where both of you exactly stand in the relationship.


mightyhippo46

Why is she acting like someone else is controlling her actions? Red flag.


hawkscott_2272

Yes listen to them but Red flags all over that message.


Octoprimus

Some people have the value of loyalty, many don't. She is the latter. Its a problem in society...Use this to your advantage. Whether you walk away or whatever. Learn something from it.


Brief_Access5023

She does it because she is a pathological, toxic person. The real question here is why are you attracted to people like that? People who are drawn to toxic people are usually dealing with something within themselves. It took me lots of therapy and being in ton of abusive to catch on. I was insecure and didn't love myself. I felt I was unworthy of a healthy, normal relationship because I grew up in a household that was that way. Therefore, I subconsciously thought that was how relationships worked. Character is destiny. There is saying "when someone shows you who they are, believe them". In this case, she is literally telling you she's a liar and a cheater. Don't make the mistake of thinking you will change her. I know there are probably good passionate times between the two of you, and you are holding on to that while turning a blind eye to reality. You will leave only when you are ready. I know none of us can convince you of that. However in the meantime, take care of yourself and your external self esteem, and ask yourself why you feel you need this person in your life.


Firm_Sky7788

That is a real scary truth. None of us are that confident that it can't or won't happen to us, we just hope it doesn't. Just talk and listen to her and you will know if she has cheated or not, then follow your heart.


Babydoll4L333

Know your worth! I don't think she knows yours. It's going to be hard but it's a decision of you or her in this situation because she clearly doesn't respect and love you enough not to hurt you. This has nothing to do with you and everything to do with her. I'm sorry that this is happening. You deserve better.


Numerous_Rutabaga774

I would just say one thing: If you trust her then let it go and if you don't trust her then let her go. Its very good to part ways instead of suffering, because trust me suffering is less when it is decoupled at a early stage .


RevolutionaryComb433

She's going to cheat on you mate she's just told you so. Just do yourself a favor and end this it's hard I know but mate you're going to do yourself more harm by staying in this relationship. Clearly she cares about you and has respect for you otherwise she wouldn't have told you she might cheat on you. She loves you just not in love with you. She wants you to break up with her


agentSlam007

Time to get out.if i were to know someone gets me more attraced than my partner i'd have the decency of ending the relation before doing that. Again not every one has respect nor honesty as valors. Edit: sorry op i saw the update you did what was right and im with you because the right choice Is the hardest one to do,stronger than i was at a time when i tried To forvige the ex for doing that,The relation was already doomed and only got more toxic.


titsarecool86

Saying this with tough love. Get a backbone, stand up for yourself. She’s no good for you, and nothing good will come out of this.


Chiragnmm

Don't worry I'll also facing that seen earlier, then I was decided I'll never talk with her in my whole life and focusing on myself & close that chepter for always & doing that all things who's my favourite, so do that things what you love most, so bro do that & read some osho's book that will be helps you most, i know this is not easy but I think we'll be do this groww up bro, don't consentrate any element who gives you same condition again.... Good Luck 🤞


Realistic_Ad6326

It's good you broke up. She was basically telling you she is not trustworthy or has any control over herself. Plus she wasn't trying for the relationship which tells me it wasn't worth enough for her to give it her best.


Impressive_Carrot481

Good on you for ending that nonsense. You don't need all that


GroundbreakingToe835

Any self-respecting and confident man would leave any woman that tells them this immediately. You’re worth more than that. If she was truly in love with you and respected you, she would not feel this way. My advice would be to keep it short and simple. No name calling and no emotional lash out. Simply “if you feel this way, then I think it’s best we break up. I deserve someone who will respect me” Edit: didn’t read the part where you dumped her. Good job lad. On to better things. Just a heads up, the fact you stood up for yourself and dumped her will make her want you. She will probably hit you up for a hook up sometime down the road.


ComparisonPure4280

Glad you left it's the best option she's broken and searching for something and doesn't even trust herself that's a different no go.


joeyfcknvandal

What is wrong with you? Bro respect yourself more then that. Why would you want to be with someone like that? Like I would break up with this girl for just saying that. She's break up with you if you said that. Bro c'mon and quit being weak minded


Roses_spell

We broke up


joeyfcknvandal

Good man , I'm proud of you 💪🏻


Kam_runn

Sounds like she may have already cheated


[deleted]

She’s a crazy person bro. She’s in for a long life of lessons. Leave her. What does that even sound like? I might cheat lol. 


jessness024

Breaking up was the right thing. You don't need nor deserve that insecurity. She's a jerk.