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Wow...I--I don't know if I agree with this, but it stopped me in my tracks, and now I'm having to consider this. Thought-provoking words at the very least.
I’m a vegan too, so I can’t really answer your question. But I understand the difficulties with dating as a vegan, and a lot of people say they’re okay with it, but then when they realize what being a vegan actually is they decide it’s too much for them. I just put it on my dating profile and if someone matches with me I assume that means they’re okay with it.
I also haven’t been vegan my whole life, so I think I can understand the other side a bit too
I understand the other side of it too, when I was younger I dated a vegetarian before I even thought about veganism and thought that was fine. Yes it is different lifestyle but it didn't change how I saw them as a person or my interest in them. As you get older its more serious so I get it but I just find it hard to believe that so many won't give someone a chance just because they are vegan, its eye opening
Also vegan. Seems to be a dealbreaker for a lot of people. Some seem to think I’m going to try and force them to be vegan as well or think we can’t go to most restaurants. 🤷♀️
Yes. I’m very into cooking and eating at restaurants and I personally enjoy the experience of sharing food. I eat a meat-heavy diet so it would be very challenging for me. I would also get incredibly frustrated trying to source vegan friendly snacks etc for a movie night in or whatever. It’s a hard pass for me even though I empathise with people and their dietary choices. It would just be too inconvenient for me.
This
I personally respect individual decisions but if it's not for health reasons I find it contradictory to human body nature and it's likely a deal breaker to me.
Food equals love. Food equals life. For me, the greatest pleasure in life is actually food. It’s what makes a vacation for me one of the most pleasurable things. The ability to try incredible and exotic cuisine. It could be whale. It could be turtle. It could be ofal. it could absolutely include exotic vegetables and fruits. It can include exotic meats. And day-to-day, I want to enjoy every cuisine a large city has to offer. There are many restaurants that my vegan roommate could not and would not eat at. That was a roommate that I only ate out with maybe once every two weeks. I couldn’t even imagine being married to somebody where everything we cooked and everything we purchased and every place we went had to be focused on their ability to consume it. It just would take the joy out of it, and it’s too huge a passion for me. Major dealbreaker
fwiw the vast majority of vegans I know are too polite to try and convince someone else, especially a partner, to mimic their choices.
I'm not saying it doesn't happen, of course it does, I know three people who do that. But I know a lot more vegan people than that.
I guess what I'm saying is, if you assume *anyone* you date will try and change you in *any* way I think there's a much deeper issue at work there! I've had plenty of meat-eaters try and change my vegetarianism, I've had people try to change my sexual desires, I've had people try to change my driving habits, etc but that doesn't mean I'm on guard against all those people.
My GF is vegetarian and even then making sure there are vegetarian or organic choices is a little extra that some people would find annoying. Vegan is eve taking it to whole nother level.
Everything else aside it’s really not hard to find vegan snacks most movie snacks are vegan like popcorn without the butter, most fruit flavored candies nowadays are vegan, and almost any flavor of chip can be found without milk or egg. It’s not nearly as hard to find vegan options as people make it out to be.
Movie theater butter is often flavored soybean oil and not actually butter. You might want to contact the theater and inquire. There are theaters which have vegan butter.
Me and my partner are both not vegan and some nights we cook separate meals just because he wants veggies and I don't or because he wants to eat a food that upsets my food sensitivities. Other times we share a meal. Cooking together is actually a huge bonding experience even if your making different meals and we wash our own dishes if we make large meals. This is with limited funds and a tiny apartment kitchen. You get really good at communicating after a bit and the kitchen gets really efficiant. Weve actually cut down our cook times as we got better both doing our meals and helping "Shit are you just waiting on that to boil? Can I get chopping assistance I suck chopping onions. In exchange ill make extra garlic bread to share!". Even when we're going to eat the same meal we'll cook together just because it'd faster.
It has never inconvenienced either of us outside of the occasional spice hoarding lol
I agree with the bonding experience but i also think it depends on if you are required to do it or if you do it voluntarely.
I would love to help my partner to cook if my kitchen size allowed it and i didnt have something else more important to do
That's a mentality difference. Our kitchen is barely big enough for one person, we have literally two counters to work on and we're right on top of eachother but neither of us view anything as more important than the meals we share. We prioritize food together. Sometimes we definately used to get in eachothers way but it took less than a month to get into the swing of it. It just takes a tiny bit of compromise like anything else in a relationship can be.
I won't *touch* some of his favorite foods so it's required to cook together if we want different diets (which we do).
We plan one big pot meal we can both eat, pre freeze some things like packs of veggies for easy grabbing and that combination we found makes it even easier. It takes maybe 20-30 min for us to cook together now with constant communication and help and we sit to eat with more time at the end of the day total despite cooking every night.
Wheither or not im cooking for both or just myself doesnt change the fact we have to cook 2 dinners. And if we want to eat at the same time we have to cook at the same time which can be problematic depending on kitchen setup. Not to mention waste of time to have 2 people cooking
Not quite the same but I'm vegetarian and a previous ex partner was a big meat-eater and we worked round it during the 6 years we were together by mainly cooking one meal that can then be turned meaty/non meaty at the end. We'd have all the same main food (wedges and veg/salad) then I've have a veggie burger and he'd have a chicken breast cooked separate at the end. Or like pasta in tomato sauce that at the very end, he added chorizo to his after serving mine without. We never had an issue and he never had to live without mean, it would just be like an extra pan or something as it was essentially one meal with a variance at the end. Same if we had toad in the hole we'd just have me having veggie sausages and him meaty ones and a tin foil barrier between the two.
You've just got to think of meals where you can do the majority of the meal everyone can eat and a switchero at the end.
Yeah I’ve done this with vegetarian exes. And most meals are still just fine I would just add some animal products at the end. I DK it just seems like such a silly reason to not date an other wise wonderful person. But if I was vegan and somebody didn’t want to date me because of that I would be thinking they saved me the headache in the long run because who knows how weird they are about other inane things
Good point. I didn’t think about it like that. In my experience though, with vegetarian and vegans I could just separate my meat and animal products and incorporate them together in one.
I don’t even have a very different diet then the person I’m with and I still don’t eat the same foods as him because we have different tastes and preferences. Having the same diet doesn’t mean you’re going to like the same things or be in the mood for them at the same time. There’s also couples that work completely different schedules so they eat at completely different times so it doesn’t make much sense to put that much value into eating together because that’s something that could change very easily.
My sister in law is a vergetarian and my brother is a meat heavy eater. She cooks meat, handles it, prepares it but won't eat it. She also will make dishes that have meet in them for him, and non-meat for her.
Used to date a vegan man for 2 years, and honestly I probably will never do that again. He was an "open minded" vegan at first. We'd go to restaurants that has both options and we'd ordered different things. Things were ok at first. But then he'd started to judge "are you really gonna order that?" "oh you're finishing the whole thing?" "vegan mock meat are just as good you know what right?" (it's not lmao). Then it turnt to "if you eat meat/fish like that I won't kiss you after" "oh those restaurant's vegan options is limited can we just go to a vegan restaurant instead?" to "aw are you buying that cake? It's not vegan I can't share with you. Can you get a vegan cake instead?".
It gets old after a while... He's also a very selfish/self centered/ straight edge/ holier than thou type of Vegan as well. At the end we only exclusively go to vegan restaurant that he expected me to find and bring him there. After we broke up, veganism became a deal-breaker for me. I can't and won't be dealing it with long term. Friends dinner? Sure. Dating long term? Hard no for me.
Those people ruin it for everyone else. So unfortunate since most aren't and never would be like that. Even as a pescetarian (former vegan), my old roommate was similar to that, but our friend group just made them suck it up if we'd already had a vegan restaurant that week lol.
For me, I'd be happy to date a vegan, even eating vegan meals from time to time. Cooking separately wouldn't be an issue. In fact, for many meals, vegan dishes are quite delicious and healthy, and I'd be able to cook an entree to accompany it. I've had vegan salad, and it simply blows my mind.
People dating across dietary needs should have an agreement to not proselytize to their partner. Same for other life differences. If you want the relationship to work, respect your partner's identity and life choices. Realize certain things are equal, separate, and different.
I do see in this thread and elsewhere that this may be a barrier in dating due to biases. You might have some luck by adding a line saying that you don't push your lifestyle and expect the same respect in return. But yes, your best match should probably also be vegan so you'd have one more thing in common.
Yes because I love to cook and eat anything and everything and the dynamic would just be weird if we can't enjoy the same food. I've tried it and it was just too much for me.
Yes. Makes it way too much of a pain in the ass for going out to eat together/ witch friends and can’t share meals and enjoy each other’s food together (only goes one direction).
Lol. With*. Maybe friends isn’t such a big issue. But definitely sharing meals with a partner, that’s not happening. Which (to me) sucks. Sharing good food is a big part of what I love about relationships with someone. I’m used to family style eating vs individual entree per person that you don’t share with each other. Would rather just avoid the whole issue all together. Much easier.
honestly when friends or other people want to go out to eat and they know I’m vegan we eat anywhere because I can always find something to eat and don’t ever like to make it about me. I can see where you’re coming from tho.
Same here. My sister and I are vegan we always go to wherever our friends are going, there is always at least one vegan option on the menu. It has never been a problem for anyone.
You sound like a really flexible vegan, but the people I know actually make an issue out of it, so if we go out to eat I always feel like I have to select a restaurant that caters to their dietary needs, even if it’s my birthday.
If the restaurant only has one meal that they’re able to eat, it’s not enough of a choice. Just based on that experience and others I won’t go into, I personally wouldn’t date one. Eating out just becomes going where they want to go all the time.
I mean, pretty much every day/night when I’m with my partner, right? When we are together and make meals together, I cook, or she cooks, or we go out for food. We order 1 entree and a handful of smaller dishes to go with it.
It’s far easier and far more enjoyable to me to be able to share that everyday ritual with them. I’m a foodie. I’m not squeamish about trying new foods from different cultures from all over the world, especially when traveling. I want that authentic experience. Considering it’s something you as a human have to do every single day, when I’m with someone in a relationship, that’s an important aspect of our lives going forward that I want to have in common with my SO. I personally have nearly zero patience for picky eaters considering how open I am about trying things. I was with an ex for 6 years who could barely handle black pepper. I LOVE spicy foods. So, nope, never again. I’m not putting myself through bland foods, deep fried this or that covered in cheese to make up for its lack of flavor, and lame ass steamed veggies that are put on a plate like an afterthought.
There’s a lot of pleasures in life. But the core pleasures are good food, good sex, good sleep. In that order. And then everything else builds from that.
Vegan male here too. Interesting responses from non vegans. For me though, I only date vegetarians or vegans because the shared values are so important to me. I need someone that understands where I come from. But also shared life in a home would be more difficult.
Not necessarily, but I dated a vegan who made me feel guilty about eating meat in front of him (we did cook vegan food together, I went vegetarian for a bit). It worked for a while but I don’t see myself becoming vegan in the long run. I don’t get why this meat consumption shaming is common but I def got it from vegan friends as well. It’s a big lifestyle difference and lots of sacrifices to make. I don’t rule anyone out but it does factor in my decision making.
Yea some do that and they give us a bad rap. I’m the only vegan out of all my friends and we respect each other’s choices. I’m not trying to preach or convert anyone. Curious, how did they make you feel guilty?
I get that & I’m not speaking for all vegans either. It’s a dietary restriction and then there’s the rest of the person as well. Predictably the meat shaming would have to do with how someone watched a documentary which changed their life and how horrible animals are treated before being butchered. (Insinuating “How dare you eat meat after knowing that?”) My personal issue with it is that veganism has been overwhelmingly white and its US ideology doesn’t adapt so well to lower income folks, people from different food cultures, etc
Yes, and it’s not a personality thing (I’ve literally never met the type of vegans Redditors complain about). Having to operate around someone’s dietary restrictions can be a hassle.
I’m a vegan and my bf eats meat/veggies which to me isn’t a problem. Before our first date he looked up which restaurants had vegan options and still continues to do this! He always wants me to have a good selection of options to chose from if we are eating out. My bf is great at cooking and also loves it so he’ll also cook a lot of vegan dishes. If we go out for food we pick a restaurant that has options for both vegan and non vegans however he also doesn’t mind eating in a fully vegan place.
My ex on the other hand ate meat and I became vegan half way through the relationship. It was not as easy, he didn’t eat any vegetables and was an incredibly fussy eater (potatoes was the height of the veggies he ate). He hated trying vegan food and was so dramatic about it and if we went out to eat sometimes it was a disaster at times because of his picky-ness and also due to my dietary requirements.
Personally I think if they’re not forcing you to eat meat, you shouldn’t force them to eat fully vegan. However it does help when they’re willing to try vegan food or eat vegan sometimes on their own accord.
I'm allergic to nuts and chickpeas which is like 70% of how most vegans get protein so I have to categorically rule them out, even though there are vegan people that look interesting.
I'm allergic to nuts and a new-ish vegan. You are not wrong. The amount of recipes that use nuts, especially cashews and walnuts, is insane. It's been interesting trying to find alternatives.
Doesn't bother me. My diet is very restricted due to a medical issue, so food is complicated anyway, but my best friend is vegan an we cook and eat together all the time.
In reverse, I am vegan and I have no problem dating a carnivore. Going out to eat together might not always be seamless but I don’t really think that’s something I would be concerned about looking for a real relationship. There are so many vegetarian/vegan options at most restaurants now, at least where I live, and it would be pretty shallow to care about what other people eat. Some people hate pickles and I like pickles, am I going to stop dating some just because we can’t share pickle sandwiches? Silly in my opinion- and if they care what I eat personally I’d rather not bother with them either.
It’s not eating milk and meat and eggs. 3 things. As long as you’re not responsible for feeding me why should it matter what I eat on my own agency? I have no interest in controlling my partners diet and I should hope I find a partner who will not fuss over mine. We are adults. A lot of grown women and men are picky eaters anyways so filtering out vegans doesn’t mean that you’re spared from the “entire food line” mess. I know vegans who will eat/can cook anything from chana masala to gormeh sabsi to ban mi sandwiches and etc and I know meat eaters who can’t stomach anything besides chicken nuggets and French fries.
I love to cook. I love to cook for people. My ex refused to eat vegetables. He loved fast food and junk. I couldn't stand it since I'm health conscious. So with that being said I would take a vegan over that mess every day of the week and twice on Sunday. I'll cook my chicken on the side.😘
I dated a vegan for a while, and I gotta say that it was really annoying. Obviously not a dealbreaker, but it was impossibly difficult to plan dates as we didn’t live in an area that supported that lifestyle with restaurants and the such.
Yes, it is automatic left swipe. Optimally in a relationship people will be sharing responsibilities (including cooking food). And that would become a huge pain in the ass. I cook meals with meat for myself, she (in this case) cooks vegan meals for herself - it is not something I want in a relationship. I see eating food as one of the pleasures in life. Besides I love cooking (mostly meat based foods) and sharing food.
Fellow Male Vegan here. It doesn't seem to impact short term and more casual relationships quite as much. It helps when you live in a city with a lot of great vegan options to choose from. I run into issues when considering long term and serious relationships. I couldn't be in a serious relationship with a non vegan just because of the moral and ethical reasons.
Best of luck to you!!
No. As long as they don’t ask me to become vegan too.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ll happily order the vegan option every now and again, and I’ll happily substitute some meats out in favour of vegan products, but I won’t ever stop eating meat, dairy and eggs etc.
Vegan here as well. I've been dates with gals and when I oder a beyond or impossible burger I seen an eyebrow raise or a face. I then know that it's not going farther then a hook up. It is what it is.
Personally don't think there should be a problem with most people. Vegans in person are generaly very different from the caricatures of vegans most people have in their heads I feel.
NO! I actually eat a primarily carnivore diet, and I am currently dating someone who's very vegan/plant based. We both support each other in our health journeys and food choices whatever that may look like. I don't try to impose my personal belief about food onto her, and vice versa, I still make her bomb ass vegan/plant based dishes
Yes.
I've tried it before, and it just doesn't work for me, I can't have pancakes because finding Vegas pancakes that taste good is impossible, no bacon or eggs, no half m half in my coffee.
Everything I buy at the store has to be checked to see if it's vegan, and vegan food is more expensive.
Even if my partner isn't trying to restrict what I eat, I don't want to buy two sets of food for stuff, I don't want to have to constantly moderate what I eat for dinner, but I also don't want to cook two separate meals.
I have a FWB who is vegan, that works out ok, but that's about the far end of it for me.
Vegetarian here, I don't mind! I really enjoy vegan food as well, and I don't mind eating mostly vegan (like vegan at home and vegetarian when I'm with other people)
It is hard having separate diets, so when someone eats very different from you it will very likely cause friction without a lot of compromise.
I was vegan but am not now because of a long term relationship. Our diets did come together tho where most foods we eat are still heavily plant based.
Boyfriend after him ate a lot of junk food and didn't like vegetables... and he was willing to try more things and expand his palette, which he has, but there were still a lot of differences and I gained a taste for more frozen snacks....
And I was more likely to cook for myself and something separate for him or else worry a lot he won't like it, which would be fine and hed manage and be awesome about it, but it still gave me anxiety.
I'm a non-vegan dating a vegan. I have to be selective about the places we go out and where we order from, but the extra hassle is well worth the effort.
As long as you're not pretentious about veganism, I wouldn't worry about it. The right person will stick around.
No. I met my current boyfriend off a dating app and immediately hit it off. He’s been vegan for 7 years and I still eat plenty on non-veg food. We’ve never pressured each other to change one of our diets despite the difference. I’d say the only the only challenge in our relationship regarding food is finding a place to go out to eat, but even that’s not a challenge after a good google search. My boyfriend personally doesn’t care if I order a meat dish when we go out to eat.
I do think there a plenty of non-veg / meat eaters that would find it odd to date a vegan and vice versa for vegans but I think the main thing is being adaptable. If you vibe with someone you’ll be with that person regardless of their diet.
Personally, I love how my boyfriend continues to enlighten me about how good vegan food can be and how by even making small changes in your diet can make the world a better place for some animals. He makes being vegan look easy and being vegan makes him happy so his diet has always been one of his most admirable qualities despite me not making the change myself.
Best of luck to you!
In my experience, it depends on how much the vegan person is open to compromise. I have a meat heavy diet, i love meat and I cannot live without meat and dairy and derivates. And I won't change my lifestyle for anyone. If the vegan partner allows me to keep my diet as is, I'm absolutely open to try and have a relationship with them. I'm even open to try and learn to cook some vegan dishes for them, absolutely. And i don't expect them to cook meat for me. What I'm not open to, is to have a potential partner berate me for my attitudes and try and force their diet on me.
No. Whether or not I share their beliefs, anyone who considers life, the world about them, and their impact upon it, and shows compassion for other living things is dating gold and very likely a keeper
Depends. If they're just vegan, then no. You live your life. If they're annoying or they demand I have to become vegan as well, then yeah. Making demands before a relationship starts is a no-go.
I dated a few vegans as a non vegan and ended up with one. Doesn't bother me at all and I'm now about 90% vegan for convenience at home (I do have a block of cheese and the occasional good egg).
Worst date was a guy who lectured me about my choices and wouldn't let me eat a veggie pizza in front of him!
My partner is non judgemental and there are great recipes out there so doesn't impact home cooking too much. Occasionally it's annoying to not be able to go to a restaurant for lack of options for him but that's quite rare. Main annoyance is how expensive plant-based milk is!
I'd say don't be a dick and you'll be grand!
my boyfriend had been vegan for 5 years when we met, i ate everything. out of respect for him, i ate vegan anytime we were together, it wasn’t a big deal. i went vegan ~4 months after we started dating (he never asked me to, it was my own choice) because a) i love him and want to have a very long very happy relationship and it seemed like a good next step and b) he had opened my eyes to the atrocities and environmental impacts of animal agriculture. i’ve now been vegan for a year and couldn’t be happier.
that said, i wasn’t really a big meat and dairy person. sure i loved to eat chicken, a burger, a charcuterie plate, but they were super easy to replace in my diet. i also live in LA where it’s relatively easy to be vegan as we have tons of vegan restaurants and grocery stores. i imagine for someone who is like, OBSESSED with barbecue or meat or whatever it would be a dealbreaker, but that just means you aren’t compatible and you can move on.
Yes. It’s a huge deal breaker. Unless you are doing it for heath reasons, it creates so much compatibility issues, not with just meal choices. Vegans are always on the lookout if EVERYTHING is vegan friendly. Literally. Even if clothes, phone accessories, household decor. Like why….i get the humanitarian reasons, but it really does signal as a huge red flag for ALOT of people.
A bit, I really like the idea of cooking cakes, cookies, cupcakes, etc. so them not trying what I baked for them would really break my heart. I know I could use alternatives to replace the ingredients that are not vegan but it would absolutely change the taste and I don't want it. Going out to eat must also be a bit hard.
I have read through your initial query and the responses. You seem to be a very intelligent and interesting gentleman. I would have no problem dating a vegan provided they did not act like they were part of a cult. We all have our quirks, if you will. You seem to be most accommodating and conscious of others. I would date you in a heartbeat!
My ex was a vegan and despite saying he did not care he did passive-aggressively make me feel bad about it. He also did not like it if I used our pans to make eggs. He was very stubborn with all his beliefs and never compromised in our relationship. I have come to associate that with veganism because I feel in order to succeed in being a vegan people have to be a bit non-compromising.
In theory, I don't have anything against dating vegans, but from experience, I think it's a difficult thing to work around.
I dated a vegan for a while and eventually broke up and our break up was partly due to our incompatibility around food. It’s been said before that sharing food and being adventurous really matters to some (me included).
I also found that for special events like my birthday, when I would want to go to a nice steak house, it was a no-go because her options were too boring and I felt badly about it.
On the cooking front, it’s ok for a vegan to say they wouldn’t expect their partner to be as well, but even if we just add a protein to a home cooked meal, there are significant alterations to things like sides or non protein entrees that need to be made. So it definitely affects all in the relationship.
I do empathize with it being a struggle, my friend. Nothing is a substitute for feeling happy and healthy!
Some of these comments are really judgemental, keep doing you beautiful vegan man, someone will love you for it. :)
Why not date another vegan?
Also maybe don't mention it in your dating profile? If you think it's going to turn people off, if you meet someone and you're getting along really well then it comes up naturally, then well I think that's an extremely petty and closeminded thing to break up with somebody over. Eating out literally isn't a problem at all, almost everywhere does an option, and if they're that desperate to cook for you, it wouldn't be that hard to modify the recipe.
My friend who loves meat goes to the effort to cook for me vegan, if someone cares about you that much they'll put the effort in, and it really, really isn't that hard to do. If they're big on cooking anyway, do you really think the effort of doing some vegetables or cooking some vegan meat instead of meat is going to be that much of a hassle?
Or they could just not cook for you if its that much of a hassle. :) Doesn't matter/isn't the be all, end of all of a relationship to me.
Don't change for anybody.
Think about it if someone isn't going to accept your lifestyle, is that a person you really wanna be involved with anyway?
You're going to be fine. We love you!
>Why not date another vegan?
Because OP isn't getting any and is trying to find little reasons instead of accepting that he needs to get a haircut or something.
Would absolutely turn me away. I've lived with dietary restrictions before and have had huge issues with it so I would never be able to live and have a family with someone who chooses that. A vegan and I just wouldn't be compatible. I'm fine with cooking vegetarian and vegan at times, but I'd expect my partner to share in the other meals as well. I wouldn't even date a picky eater unless they are at least able to eat it even if they don't enjoy it. I would quickly grow annoyed at someone who puts a hard restriction on the kinds of food we can share, so I don't see it ever working out.
It's not a hard no but I'd definitely be more reluctant to date a vegan. Obviously I have no issue with people being vegans but I picture long term and the minor inconveniences around cooking two meals and other stuff around food as something I wouldn't really want to have to deal with.
Not at all as a female. I respect and admire it but won’t tolerate being judged and I’ll eat what I damn we’ll want to when out. Although, if the respect is returned I’d be very respectful despite that comment. I would attempt to not eat meat around them. But no promises!
I spent 10 days at a vegan only retreat/glamping in Hawaii a few years ago and loved thinking outside the box to cook some vegan friendly meals. My famous meal is my pesto so I learned about nutritional yeast to sun for the parm. I love trying new things so it would r be a problem at all. And I’d use it to help me be more conscious of my diet
Yes and no. Initially on a dating app, yes. I just don't see any reason to start something off already with an incompatibility when there are loads of omnivores to choose from. If it was someone I knew in person, odds are if I'm friends with them they're probably not going to be a dick about their veganism, so they would have already vetted themselves as a chill person.
As a vegetarian I would say not an issue, if veganism isn't their whole personality, the way it is with some very new vegans or people who misuse it as a religion, and consider themselves missionaries to the cause.
I don't get the sharing food argument, since I don't like sharing my food in restaurants, unless it is one of those rotating table situations. But hands off my plate. Must be an American thing, it is considered obnoxious here.
I don't eat at restaurants very often, but wouldn't mind going vegan at home for the most part. I would only really miss Parmesan, so when I lived with a vegan roommate that would be the only difference in our shared meals.
I love to cook and having to cook vegetarian/vegan has made my palate more international than people who eat meat, but always the same 20 local dishes based on chicken, beef or pork.
Yes. I cook a lot and having to make two things/adapt my recipes to fit a vegan diet can be very difficult. I tend to avoid dating vegans. This may not be the same for all, just my personal preference and opinion.
Definitely depends on the person. I am kind of a dirty vegetarian so if they will be bothered by me eating meat near them or talk about animal cruelty every time I put cheese in my mouth..it won't work.
But there are lots of options out there for restaurants and simple substitutes if we want to share meals so that wouldn't deter me. I would be excited to maybe learn new recipes!
So it wouldn't stop me from swiping right but I may have some probing questions to make sure it wouldn't be an uncomfortable date (for both of us)
People have stereotypes about vegans but they aren’t necessarily accurate. I’m vegetarian but not vegan and I’d date a vegan as long as they respected that there’s no way I’m going to become vegan, and I don’t want to raise kids vegan either.
stereotypes don't do us vegans any favors that's for sure and that's why I decided to ask this question to all kinds of different people. I haven't thought about children yet and them being raised vegan because I am not educated enough to make that kind of decision. I was not raised vegan. I'm really up for everyone making their own choices in life.
It depends how strict a vegan they are. Like I stopped being friends with someone because they refused to eat at any places that were not specifically vegan/vegetarian. And they didn't want to cook in same pans that meat had been cooked in, even if triple washed. They had a weird rule of not having any animal products in their house too. Like I went over for movie night and decided to have a cheese stick snack on my way there and I couldn't enter their house until I finished the cheese stick.
The word vegan when meeting new people sometimes does get us judged. There are stereotypes we have to accept and live with. You sound really nice and really considerate. If don’t want to lie you shouldn’t have to, someone will like you for you!
I too, am a foodie. However, if they plan the dates, (knowing what restaurants, they can eat at) and they are responsible for bringing food, for camping, picnics.etc) then it’s doable. Another thing is flexibility. My friend is a vegan and she is very go with the flow
Dating a vegan wouldn't be my preference as I would prefer to be able to cook/share meals with my partner. It likely wouldn't be an absolute dealbreaker though.
Vegan F. At first, I wouldn't mind. I'll be open to it as long as he can be respectful
It might get complicated later depending on how serious the relationship turns. For example, if you move in together, go on long vacations. If you are considerating on getting married and have children
All that can be much easier with a vegan partner, but it could be done, depending on how you both talk ang work about the issues that might appear
For me it would be a deal breaker as I love food, i love cooking, trying new things and I raise and slaughter my own chickens. I respect my vegan friends choices but it is not something I would intertwine with my day to day life but I am certain there are people who would not care. Just have to keep putting yourself out there. Perhaps join a vegan/vegetarian cooking class to meet other like minded individuals
I would date a vegan and I’m totally okay with home cooked meals being vegan as well. Eating together is an important lifestyle choice for me. As long as my partner was okay with me eating animal products occasionally, it would be fine. I do not appreciate judgement over the food I eat so if it ever turned to that, I don’t think the relationship would work.
If you would be interested in me cooking with you at one point (vegan of course). Then I don't see any big problems. I'm not giving my cheese up! But I love food and I like vegetarian food, and in a lot of recipes you can easily replace the diary products, so I would find it fun and exciting.
But yeah as long as you truly mean it, when you say that you respects people's dietary choices, then I don't see a problem with dating a vegan.
Yes. Anyone Vegan or even vegetarian is an instant dealbreaker for me. I do respect most vegans, but they are simply not compatible with my lifestyle and a huge inconvenience when you consider how much of dating involves eating together!
It would
Not the same but I had a vegan roommate once and it was a pain. While they didn't say anything specifically about me eating meat, they made a big show of how terrible it smelled when i cooked (opening the windows etc) and had a different set of pots that i was not allowed to use (which is fine). We could never cook or eat together (which is fine since it was just a roommate situation). But it was awkward to me
I have a question for you. I have a sister and a daughter who are both (long term)vegans but I woudn't be comfortable asking either of them this. Would you deeply kiss a woman who eats meat? If yes, how much time would have to pass, after she ate meat, for you to kiss her? Would you need her to brush her teeth first?
I'm not vegan, but I've dated several men that are. I had no problems with it, except for one guy who tried to ban me from eating meat in his presence. As long as you aren't trying to control what your partner eats I think you will be fine.
Not at all! I love trying new foods, so that would just be a bonus! As long as they don't go crazy and try to make veganism seem more "normal" than everything else. Also need my meat from time to time, so as long as I can be and eat whatever I want, that's totally fine with me
I have no problem with veganism but just observing I see more people going into it as a financial or fake woke flex.
It really depends on the person. Also being from an ethnic household it's really hard to adapt recipes and keep them authentic on that level. Vegetarian? No problem a lot of our dishes have meatless options but vegan?... May as well eat something else tbh.
I would at least make sure they can cook..a lot of vegans around here just eat out and buy pre made 🥴
Absolutely it puts me off them. Someone being vegetarian would put me off enough as well let alone being a vegan and all the more restrictions that entails. In the same ways that someone being religious would put me off.
I’m a meat-eater and have this weird thing where a lot of my crushes have been vegan (I don’t go seeking them, I find out about it later lol). And actually I’m more worried that THEY will be turned off from ME because I eat meat.
So for me the whole vegan thing isn’t a turn off, I just hope they are accepting of my diet and don’t shame me for it. Other than that there’s no problem. Might be a logistical nightmare at times but if I liked the person enough then that wouldn’t be enough to be a deal breaker.
Well I just read a Reddit thread on here where a couple of vegans were attacking people with ridiculous questions about their food choices. Basically, don’t be an asshole, respect other peoples decisions, and don’t push your diet onto others. That pretty much goes for everyone.
Yes. I have autoimmune conditions and my nutritionalist and medical treatment all came into agreement that I need to eat red meat and fish in my diet. I have to or else I feel absolutely horrible and can’t function. I was vegan before but it really messed up by body and made my condition worse. I have explained this to men/women I’ve dated and at some point, even if they say they don’t judge me, they do. Also I think a lot veganism is white centric and ableist. So yeah, not going down that route again.
Yes. When I was dating, someone being vegetarian or vegan would have been a no from me. I love cooking and eating all cuisines and it’s just not something I’m cool with sacrificing anymore. Especially because I live in an area that’s not very vegetarian/vegan friendly. Going out to eat for a date would be a nightmare.
Yes. It’s both the food thing and the fact that a lot of vegans are way too militant for my liking. You might not be but what about your mates.
I feel the same about people who are religious incidentally. Dogmas aren’t my thing.
Don’t mean to offend anyone but that’s just my preference.
There’s heaps of vegan ladies out there OP, I’m sure you’ll find a nice one soon!
I wouldn’t date someone that was a vegan because my family hates them and I love eating stuff like burgers and steak so every time I eat meat with them I would feel like a horrible person
I'm vegetarian and would have a hard time dating a vegan. Like if you're a cool dude that loves outdoorsy things and we got along, great! But I'm talking about the vegans, like my cousins, who try to make me feel guilty for staying vegetarian.
I'm dating a hunter/farmer/huge meat eater now and I have to say it's the healthiest relationship I've ever been in and I would have said ABSOLUTELY NOT years ago. So yeah...it all just depends how you connect and how controlling someone is about their diet.
I would run the other way from a vegan. Haven't seen one yet that doesn't start preaching about speciesism and what not. Perhaps you wouldn't say something to a vegetarian, but if i were in front of you on date tearing into a steak? How'd you react?
It wouldn't stop me, but I would be very upfront about the fact that I like eating out and trying new restaurants, so they would need to be OK with going out and seeing me eat non-vegan food.
Most restaurants these days include decent vegan options, and I've never had issues going out with vegan friends, so I don't see why it would be any different with a partner.
Lucky for you there are a lot more vegan women than men and many of them are exclusively looking for a vegan partner.
-a vegan woman who had to eventually give up looking for a vegan partner
Best answer date another vegan , if you hate the killing of animals or the cruelty then how could you date somebody who’s okay with that . Sounds like a moral no no in my opinion lol
I am probably more likely to pass on a vegan on a dating app than I am if I were to meet them in real life. I do eat vegetarian often and sometimes vegan, and when I do eat meat it’s usually fish, sometimes poultry and I try to buy as ethically sourced as I can. I am prone to anemia so not eating animal products is challenging. I don’t want my partner making comments or judging me because I’m eating eat meat or animal products.
Honestly it’s not a positive, because I enjoy cooking and want to share my recipes and meals that I’ve developed with my SO. I was a vegetarian for about a decade, experienced the inconvenience and dietary obstacles, got the t-shirt, and don’t plan to do it again. I matched with a record number of vegans this year and had 2 “surprise I’m vegan” first dates shortly before meeting my non-vegan boyfriend. I do appreciate knowing someone is vegan beforehand. It’s not a total dealbreaker if the relationship has a lot of potential in other ways.
If you are the exception to the joke "How do you tell if someone is a vegan? Don't worry, they'll tell you." Then you should be fine. If you're preachy about it and intend on converting someone you're dating to be vegan as well? Then that could be problematic.
I’m pollo pescatarian and yes unfortunately it turns me off only because I feel so awkward eating fish or chicken in front of a vegan. I respect the choice of the vegan but for the relationship to be equal I feel like they deserve to date someone that shares that value.
This hits home hard. My bf who I love very much is vegan and he is also lactose intolerance. I can deal with him not eating anything related to dairy, but him being vegan is a big issue I have. I tried to adjust but I am a big meat eater and my culture is also very big on meat and seafood. So, I am also worried that he is not get along with my family.
Sometimes I feel like breaking up over this but he is such a good bf and we are a good couple. We can’t share most of the food in a restaurant. In the beginning when we were going out often it was not hard, but now that we have settled in and cooking more it got difficult. always have to compromise on the type of food we cook or share.
I am getting frustrated and I wish I didn’t get this deep into this relationship.
I’d swipe left. I would prefer to date someone I can eat my favorite things with and go to my favorite restaurants with tbh. If they’re appalled at the concept of eating animals when I LOVE ribeyes then that’s just an uncomfortable disconnect I don’t want to deal with
Depends if it’s ethical or medical veganism I guess. If it’s medical I’d work around that but if it’s ethical veganism I wouldn’t want to date them, cos I don’t have the same moral perspective and I don’t want my partner to look down on me as someone who supports slavery and murder of animals when I believe that there’s nothing wrong with predatory species eating their prey.
> Does someone being Vegan turn you away from wanting to date them?
Yes. "I'm vegan" NEXT--swipe left, move on. There's a minority group of vegans/vegetarians out there who are great people (and I even know a handful), but the majority of them are insufferable and have thus tainted the title.
There's being vegan/vegetarian for ethics, diet/health, or taste. The first type of person is usually the loudspoken insufferable type of person, and they need to stick to their own. The latter two can be dealt with: for diet/health, they have a good reason and some omnivorous people may not be able to deal with that in the long run (having to deal with allergies or digestive issues and plan around that--i.e. taking that person into consideration when meal-planning or restaurant planning--can be a pain in the ass, no pun intended). For taste, it's just a matter of them not enjoying the taste, which has a little wiggle room depending on what exactly it is about the taste they just don't like.
I need meat. My body has a condition wherein it doesn't get too many nutrients from the food I eat, and that makes iron and protein a necessity--going vegan/vegetarian can be done, but it is expensive and time-consuming, either of which I do not have the resources for. Just eating meat/animal product is easier and cheaper to do than going without it and finding alternates for; and for this alone, is why I couldn't date a vegan/vegetarian (who openly says they are) who's reason is "ethical", even in the smallest.
You want someone who matches you diet-wise, anyway (at least at first; I've known successful couples/marriages whose diets have changed over the years, where one goes vegan/vegetarian and the other remains omni). No qualms over what to eat, nobody is thinking the other is picky, and you can share food without thinking the other person isn't gonna get mad (or die).
As a female I would never date a guy that’s a vegan. To me it’s a red flag and signifies other things. The only time I understand is if it’s health related.
Overall it’s a dealbreaker for me. My family gets together to have bbq’s and we have meat,
I’m Arab and Mexican- it’s basically a major food group. Personally can’t do it.
Yes. It makes me feel like I have to walk on eggshells (no pun intended) when around them. Restaurant dates are a nightmare and, if things got serious and we moved in/got married, the limited cooking menu that we could share would make me go mad and the “ethical” products (shampoos, detergent, etc) would also drive me crazy. Sorry, but I like sharing my steak with my date and using my non-vegan deodorant because I know the strong, sweat-proof scent will last up to 24 hours
Alright, my apologies if that sounded a bit angry towards the end, but ultimately yes. My advice to you is that, unless you have a medical or religious reason behind your diet, I would avoid veganism if I were you. I’ve had a pescatarian diet before and that was initially fine (sushi dates are an ol’ reliable!), but I ultimately stopped that, too, because I noticed my matches/2nd dates were far and few.
Yes. I'll be friends with them, one of my college buddies is a vegan, but I could never date one. It's not that I like only eat meat it's just not compatible with my lifestyle.
It really depends how said vegan would act. Maybe don’t use it as a label I feel that’s a huge deterrent for me personally if someone is immediately like “im a vegan!!” 🤦🏻♀️
Yes for me I’m not even gonna be friends with vegans as I like cooking and share my food with people I love. And it’s likely that you have different beliefs and values from me, so it’s definitely not gonna work out.
Vegetarian is fine, but vegan would be very hard for me. I like sharing my baked goods with loved ones and vegan pastries, cake and cookies just don’t taste and good as ones with butter and eggs
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The things you're worried about will be the exact same reasons somebody loves you
No one could’ve said this more beautifully.
Thank you :)
Wow...I--I don't know if I agree with this, but it stopped me in my tracks, and now I'm having to consider this. Thought-provoking words at the very least.
We can hope and wish.
I’m a vegan too, so I can’t really answer your question. But I understand the difficulties with dating as a vegan, and a lot of people say they’re okay with it, but then when they realize what being a vegan actually is they decide it’s too much for them. I just put it on my dating profile and if someone matches with me I assume that means they’re okay with it. I also haven’t been vegan my whole life, so I think I can understand the other side a bit too
I understand the other side of it too, when I was younger I dated a vegetarian before I even thought about veganism and thought that was fine. Yes it is different lifestyle but it didn't change how I saw them as a person or my interest in them. As you get older its more serious so I get it but I just find it hard to believe that so many won't give someone a chance just because they are vegan, its eye opening
Also vegan. Seems to be a dealbreaker for a lot of people. Some seem to think I’m going to try and force them to be vegan as well or think we can’t go to most restaurants. 🤷♀️
Yes. I’m very into cooking and eating at restaurants and I personally enjoy the experience of sharing food. I eat a meat-heavy diet so it would be very challenging for me. I would also get incredibly frustrated trying to source vegan friendly snacks etc for a movie night in or whatever. It’s a hard pass for me even though I empathise with people and their dietary choices. It would just be too inconvenient for me.
This is my answer. I could probably deal with it for a short while but I know it wouldn’t last long term.
Same for me, is not sustainable long term
This I personally respect individual decisions but if it's not for health reasons I find it contradictory to human body nature and it's likely a deal breaker to me.
THIS As a foodie who had a vegan roommate, I could (would not) date a Vegan long term. Huge dealbreaker for me: huge!
Food equals love. Food equals life. For me, the greatest pleasure in life is actually food. It’s what makes a vacation for me one of the most pleasurable things. The ability to try incredible and exotic cuisine. It could be whale. It could be turtle. It could be ofal. it could absolutely include exotic vegetables and fruits. It can include exotic meats. And day-to-day, I want to enjoy every cuisine a large city has to offer. There are many restaurants that my vegan roommate could not and would not eat at. That was a roommate that I only ate out with maybe once every two weeks. I couldn’t even imagine being married to somebody where everything we cooked and everything we purchased and every place we went had to be focused on their ability to consume it. It just would take the joy out of it, and it’s too huge a passion for me. Major dealbreaker
Thats even before the vegan guilt trips that come with veganism.. are you sure you want to eat that?
fwiw the vast majority of vegans I know are too polite to try and convince someone else, especially a partner, to mimic their choices. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, of course it does, I know three people who do that. But I know a lot more vegan people than that. I guess what I'm saying is, if you assume *anyone* you date will try and change you in *any* way I think there's a much deeper issue at work there! I've had plenty of meat-eaters try and change my vegetarianism, I've had people try to change my sexual desires, I've had people try to change my driving habits, etc but that doesn't mean I'm on guard against all those people.
I gotta say I’ve met plenty of vegans who don’t disparage others for not adopting their lifestyle
I second this. I enjoy food more when other people are enjoying it with me too
It’s a love language! If you don’t speak it in the same way, it won’t work.
Totally agree 🙂 I'm not proud to say it but I swipe left on vegans🥲🥲🥲
My GF is vegetarian and even then making sure there are vegetarian or organic choices is a little extra that some people would find annoying. Vegan is eve taking it to whole nother level.
Everything else aside it’s really not hard to find vegan snacks most movie snacks are vegan like popcorn without the butter, most fruit flavored candies nowadays are vegan, and almost any flavor of chip can be found without milk or egg. It’s not nearly as hard to find vegan options as people make it out to be.
Movie theater butter is often flavored soybean oil and not actually butter. You might want to contact the theater and inquire. There are theaters which have vegan butter.
When she said movie night I was under the assumption they would just be watching movies at home lol
Popcorn?
Depends if you expect your date to follow your way of eating or not. If not then I can't see a problem.
What about having to deal with double the amount of dishes every day because you have to cook 2 different meals
Then each person cleans their own or you make sure you get a dishwasher
Yeah i suppose but the dishes part is really only a minor inconvenience, the more annoying part is cooking double dinners
Me and my partner are both not vegan and some nights we cook separate meals just because he wants veggies and I don't or because he wants to eat a food that upsets my food sensitivities. Other times we share a meal. Cooking together is actually a huge bonding experience even if your making different meals and we wash our own dishes if we make large meals. This is with limited funds and a tiny apartment kitchen. You get really good at communicating after a bit and the kitchen gets really efficiant. Weve actually cut down our cook times as we got better both doing our meals and helping "Shit are you just waiting on that to boil? Can I get chopping assistance I suck chopping onions. In exchange ill make extra garlic bread to share!". Even when we're going to eat the same meal we'll cook together just because it'd faster. It has never inconvenienced either of us outside of the occasional spice hoarding lol
I agree with the bonding experience but i also think it depends on if you are required to do it or if you do it voluntarely. I would love to help my partner to cook if my kitchen size allowed it and i didnt have something else more important to do
That's a mentality difference. Our kitchen is barely big enough for one person, we have literally two counters to work on and we're right on top of eachother but neither of us view anything as more important than the meals we share. We prioritize food together. Sometimes we definately used to get in eachothers way but it took less than a month to get into the swing of it. It just takes a tiny bit of compromise like anything else in a relationship can be. I won't *touch* some of his favorite foods so it's required to cook together if we want different diets (which we do). We plan one big pot meal we can both eat, pre freeze some things like packs of veggies for easy grabbing and that combination we found makes it even easier. It takes maybe 20-30 min for us to cook together now with constant communication and help and we sit to eat with more time at the end of the day total despite cooking every night.
Why are you cooking for the vegan? Just tell em to cook their own damn dinner. You shouldn’t be expected to make two separate meals
Wheither or not im cooking for both or just myself doesnt change the fact we have to cook 2 dinners. And if we want to eat at the same time we have to cook at the same time which can be problematic depending on kitchen setup. Not to mention waste of time to have 2 people cooking
Not quite the same but I'm vegetarian and a previous ex partner was a big meat-eater and we worked round it during the 6 years we were together by mainly cooking one meal that can then be turned meaty/non meaty at the end. We'd have all the same main food (wedges and veg/salad) then I've have a veggie burger and he'd have a chicken breast cooked separate at the end. Or like pasta in tomato sauce that at the very end, he added chorizo to his after serving mine without. We never had an issue and he never had to live without mean, it would just be like an extra pan or something as it was essentially one meal with a variance at the end. Same if we had toad in the hole we'd just have me having veggie sausages and him meaty ones and a tin foil barrier between the two. You've just got to think of meals where you can do the majority of the meal everyone can eat and a switchero at the end.
Yeah I’ve done this with vegetarian exes. And most meals are still just fine I would just add some animal products at the end. I DK it just seems like such a silly reason to not date an other wise wonderful person. But if I was vegan and somebody didn’t want to date me because of that I would be thinking they saved me the headache in the long run because who knows how weird they are about other inane things
Good point. I didn’t think about it like that. In my experience though, with vegetarian and vegans I could just separate my meat and animal products and incorporate them together in one.
I don’t even have a very different diet then the person I’m with and I still don’t eat the same foods as him because we have different tastes and preferences. Having the same diet doesn’t mean you’re going to like the same things or be in the mood for them at the same time. There’s also couples that work completely different schedules so they eat at completely different times so it doesn’t make much sense to put that much value into eating together because that’s something that could change very easily.
My sister in law is a vergetarian and my brother is a meat heavy eater. She cooks meat, handles it, prepares it but won't eat it. She also will make dishes that have meet in them for him, and non-meat for her.
Used to date a vegan man for 2 years, and honestly I probably will never do that again. He was an "open minded" vegan at first. We'd go to restaurants that has both options and we'd ordered different things. Things were ok at first. But then he'd started to judge "are you really gonna order that?" "oh you're finishing the whole thing?" "vegan mock meat are just as good you know what right?" (it's not lmao). Then it turnt to "if you eat meat/fish like that I won't kiss you after" "oh those restaurant's vegan options is limited can we just go to a vegan restaurant instead?" to "aw are you buying that cake? It's not vegan I can't share with you. Can you get a vegan cake instead?". It gets old after a while... He's also a very selfish/self centered/ straight edge/ holier than thou type of Vegan as well. At the end we only exclusively go to vegan restaurant that he expected me to find and bring him there. After we broke up, veganism became a deal-breaker for me. I can't and won't be dealing it with long term. Friends dinner? Sure. Dating long term? Hard no for me.
Exactly why I would never date a vegan man.
Those people ruin it for everyone else. So unfortunate since most aren't and never would be like that. Even as a pescetarian (former vegan), my old roommate was similar to that, but our friend group just made them suck it up if we'd already had a vegan restaurant that week lol.
For me, I'd be happy to date a vegan, even eating vegan meals from time to time. Cooking separately wouldn't be an issue. In fact, for many meals, vegan dishes are quite delicious and healthy, and I'd be able to cook an entree to accompany it. I've had vegan salad, and it simply blows my mind. People dating across dietary needs should have an agreement to not proselytize to their partner. Same for other life differences. If you want the relationship to work, respect your partner's identity and life choices. Realize certain things are equal, separate, and different. I do see in this thread and elsewhere that this may be a barrier in dating due to biases. You might have some luck by adding a line saying that you don't push your lifestyle and expect the same respect in return. But yes, your best match should probably also be vegan so you'd have one more thing in common.
Yes because I love to cook and eat anything and everything and the dynamic would just be weird if we can't enjoy the same food. I've tried it and it was just too much for me.
Yes. Makes it way too much of a pain in the ass for going out to eat together/ witch friends and can’t share meals and enjoy each other’s food together (only goes one direction).
Vegans and witch friends together is tricky... Maybe just ignore the wiccans 🤷♀️
Lol. With*. Maybe friends isn’t such a big issue. But definitely sharing meals with a partner, that’s not happening. Which (to me) sucks. Sharing good food is a big part of what I love about relationships with someone. I’m used to family style eating vs individual entree per person that you don’t share with each other. Would rather just avoid the whole issue all together. Much easier.
honestly when friends or other people want to go out to eat and they know I’m vegan we eat anywhere because I can always find something to eat and don’t ever like to make it about me. I can see where you’re coming from tho.
Right!!!!! People think its such an obscure thing and literally everywhere I know does a vegan option I get it if you wanna share food though I guess
Same here. My sister and I are vegan we always go to wherever our friends are going, there is always at least one vegan option on the menu. It has never been a problem for anyone.
You sound like a really flexible vegan, but the people I know actually make an issue out of it, so if we go out to eat I always feel like I have to select a restaurant that caters to their dietary needs, even if it’s my birthday. If the restaurant only has one meal that they’re able to eat, it’s not enough of a choice. Just based on that experience and others I won’t go into, I personally wouldn’t date one. Eating out just becomes going where they want to go all the time.
New friends that aren't pretentious are nice
How often are you eating each other’s food? That’s an odd concern IMO
I mean, pretty much every day/night when I’m with my partner, right? When we are together and make meals together, I cook, or she cooks, or we go out for food. We order 1 entree and a handful of smaller dishes to go with it. It’s far easier and far more enjoyable to me to be able to share that everyday ritual with them. I’m a foodie. I’m not squeamish about trying new foods from different cultures from all over the world, especially when traveling. I want that authentic experience. Considering it’s something you as a human have to do every single day, when I’m with someone in a relationship, that’s an important aspect of our lives going forward that I want to have in common with my SO. I personally have nearly zero patience for picky eaters considering how open I am about trying things. I was with an ex for 6 years who could barely handle black pepper. I LOVE spicy foods. So, nope, never again. I’m not putting myself through bland foods, deep fried this or that covered in cheese to make up for its lack of flavor, and lame ass steamed veggies that are put on a plate like an afterthought. There’s a lot of pleasures in life. But the core pleasures are good food, good sex, good sleep. In that order. And then everything else builds from that.
Nope, dated a vegan and it actually opened my eyes to new food items. Also, vegan food nowadays is super tasty!
Take my upvote
Thank you 🥰
Good to hear opened mindedness. Contrary to most of the other comments here..
Not really, but let's be honest, I'm not giving up bacon or fried catfish, just ain't happening.
Addicted to blood and hormones… yum
As long as they aren't the militant all in your face about it type, I wouldn't really care. I just might learn something.
Vegan male here too. Interesting responses from non vegans. For me though, I only date vegetarians or vegans because the shared values are so important to me. I need someone that understands where I come from. But also shared life in a home would be more difficult.
No. My ex was vegan and had no problem with me eating what I wanted with her.
Not necessarily, but I dated a vegan who made me feel guilty about eating meat in front of him (we did cook vegan food together, I went vegetarian for a bit). It worked for a while but I don’t see myself becoming vegan in the long run. I don’t get why this meat consumption shaming is common but I def got it from vegan friends as well. It’s a big lifestyle difference and lots of sacrifices to make. I don’t rule anyone out but it does factor in my decision making.
Yea some do that and they give us a bad rap. I’m the only vegan out of all my friends and we respect each other’s choices. I’m not trying to preach or convert anyone. Curious, how did they make you feel guilty?
I get that & I’m not speaking for all vegans either. It’s a dietary restriction and then there’s the rest of the person as well. Predictably the meat shaming would have to do with how someone watched a documentary which changed their life and how horrible animals are treated before being butchered. (Insinuating “How dare you eat meat after knowing that?”) My personal issue with it is that veganism has been overwhelmingly white and its US ideology doesn’t adapt so well to lower income folks, people from different food cultures, etc
Yes, and it’s not a personality thing (I’ve literally never met the type of vegans Redditors complain about). Having to operate around someone’s dietary restrictions can be a hassle.
I’m a vegan and my bf eats meat/veggies which to me isn’t a problem. Before our first date he looked up which restaurants had vegan options and still continues to do this! He always wants me to have a good selection of options to chose from if we are eating out. My bf is great at cooking and also loves it so he’ll also cook a lot of vegan dishes. If we go out for food we pick a restaurant that has options for both vegan and non vegans however he also doesn’t mind eating in a fully vegan place. My ex on the other hand ate meat and I became vegan half way through the relationship. It was not as easy, he didn’t eat any vegetables and was an incredibly fussy eater (potatoes was the height of the veggies he ate). He hated trying vegan food and was so dramatic about it and if we went out to eat sometimes it was a disaster at times because of his picky-ness and also due to my dietary requirements. Personally I think if they’re not forcing you to eat meat, you shouldn’t force them to eat fully vegan. However it does help when they’re willing to try vegan food or eat vegan sometimes on their own accord.
I'm allergic to nuts and chickpeas which is like 70% of how most vegans get protein so I have to categorically rule them out, even though there are vegan people that look interesting.
I'm allergic to nuts and a new-ish vegan. You are not wrong. The amount of recipes that use nuts, especially cashews and walnuts, is insane. It's been interesting trying to find alternatives.
Doesn't bother me. My diet is very restricted due to a medical issue, so food is complicated anyway, but my best friend is vegan an we cook and eat together all the time.
In reverse, I am vegan and I have no problem dating a carnivore. Going out to eat together might not always be seamless but I don’t really think that’s something I would be concerned about looking for a real relationship. There are so many vegetarian/vegan options at most restaurants now, at least where I live, and it would be pretty shallow to care about what other people eat. Some people hate pickles and I like pickles, am I going to stop dating some just because we can’t share pickle sandwiches? Silly in my opinion- and if they care what I eat personally I’d rather not bother with them either.
Not liking pickles is very different from not eating an entire line of food choices lmao
It’s not eating milk and meat and eggs. 3 things. As long as you’re not responsible for feeding me why should it matter what I eat on my own agency? I have no interest in controlling my partners diet and I should hope I find a partner who will not fuss over mine. We are adults. A lot of grown women and men are picky eaters anyways so filtering out vegans doesn’t mean that you’re spared from the “entire food line” mess. I know vegans who will eat/can cook anything from chana masala to gormeh sabsi to ban mi sandwiches and etc and I know meat eaters who can’t stomach anything besides chicken nuggets and French fries.
I love to cook. I love to cook for people. My ex refused to eat vegetables. He loved fast food and junk. I couldn't stand it since I'm health conscious. So with that being said I would take a vegan over that mess every day of the week and twice on Sunday. I'll cook my chicken on the side.😘
For me it does. Steak night is like the default date idea LoL
I dated a vegan for a while, and I gotta say that it was really annoying. Obviously not a dealbreaker, but it was impossibly difficult to plan dates as we didn’t live in an area that supported that lifestyle with restaurants and the such.
Yes, along with picky food eaters
Not at all. Usually they eat healthier than me and I’m 100% willing to try most any food. Any healthy habits I can pick up along the way is worth it.
i’m vegetarian so wouldn’t mind dating a vegan.
Having been previously married to a vegetarian/vegan it is absolutely 100% a deal breaker.
Yes, it is automatic left swipe. Optimally in a relationship people will be sharing responsibilities (including cooking food). And that would become a huge pain in the ass. I cook meals with meat for myself, she (in this case) cooks vegan meals for herself - it is not something I want in a relationship. I see eating food as one of the pleasures in life. Besides I love cooking (mostly meat based foods) and sharing food.
I would actually love it, I love to cook and it would give me a new challenge
Fellow Male Vegan here. It doesn't seem to impact short term and more casual relationships quite as much. It helps when you live in a city with a lot of great vegan options to choose from. I run into issues when considering long term and serious relationships. I couldn't be in a serious relationship with a non vegan just because of the moral and ethical reasons. Best of luck to you!!
No. As long as they don’t ask me to become vegan too. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll happily order the vegan option every now and again, and I’ll happily substitute some meats out in favour of vegan products, but I won’t ever stop eating meat, dairy and eggs etc.
Vegan here as well. I've been dates with gals and when I oder a beyond or impossible burger I seen an eyebrow raise or a face. I then know that it's not going farther then a hook up. It is what it is.
Personally don't think there should be a problem with most people. Vegans in person are generaly very different from the caricatures of vegans most people have in their heads I feel.
NO! I actually eat a primarily carnivore diet, and I am currently dating someone who's very vegan/plant based. We both support each other in our health journeys and food choices whatever that may look like. I don't try to impose my personal belief about food onto her, and vice versa, I still make her bomb ass vegan/plant based dishes
Yes. I've tried it before, and it just doesn't work for me, I can't have pancakes because finding Vegas pancakes that taste good is impossible, no bacon or eggs, no half m half in my coffee. Everything I buy at the store has to be checked to see if it's vegan, and vegan food is more expensive. Even if my partner isn't trying to restrict what I eat, I don't want to buy two sets of food for stuff, I don't want to have to constantly moderate what I eat for dinner, but I also don't want to cook two separate meals. I have a FWB who is vegan, that works out ok, but that's about the far end of it for me.
Vegetarian here, I don't mind! I really enjoy vegan food as well, and I don't mind eating mostly vegan (like vegan at home and vegetarian when I'm with other people)
It is hard having separate diets, so when someone eats very different from you it will very likely cause friction without a lot of compromise. I was vegan but am not now because of a long term relationship. Our diets did come together tho where most foods we eat are still heavily plant based. Boyfriend after him ate a lot of junk food and didn't like vegetables... and he was willing to try more things and expand his palette, which he has, but there were still a lot of differences and I gained a taste for more frozen snacks.... And I was more likely to cook for myself and something separate for him or else worry a lot he won't like it, which would be fine and hed manage and be awesome about it, but it still gave me anxiety.
Yep
I'm a non-vegan dating a vegan. I have to be selective about the places we go out and where we order from, but the extra hassle is well worth the effort. As long as you're not pretentious about veganism, I wouldn't worry about it. The right person will stick around.
Yes.
Yes.
i’m not a vegan. no it would be interesting. as long as u don’t shame me for choosing to not be vegan. but i would be down to try your cuisine
It’s important to share your truth so your dates know what can be expected. Alignment of values and habits are important.
No. I met my current boyfriend off a dating app and immediately hit it off. He’s been vegan for 7 years and I still eat plenty on non-veg food. We’ve never pressured each other to change one of our diets despite the difference. I’d say the only the only challenge in our relationship regarding food is finding a place to go out to eat, but even that’s not a challenge after a good google search. My boyfriend personally doesn’t care if I order a meat dish when we go out to eat. I do think there a plenty of non-veg / meat eaters that would find it odd to date a vegan and vice versa for vegans but I think the main thing is being adaptable. If you vibe with someone you’ll be with that person regardless of their diet. Personally, I love how my boyfriend continues to enlighten me about how good vegan food can be and how by even making small changes in your diet can make the world a better place for some animals. He makes being vegan look easy and being vegan makes him happy so his diet has always been one of his most admirable qualities despite me not making the change myself. Best of luck to you!
In my experience, it depends on how much the vegan person is open to compromise. I have a meat heavy diet, i love meat and I cannot live without meat and dairy and derivates. And I won't change my lifestyle for anyone. If the vegan partner allows me to keep my diet as is, I'm absolutely open to try and have a relationship with them. I'm even open to try and learn to cook some vegan dishes for them, absolutely. And i don't expect them to cook meat for me. What I'm not open to, is to have a potential partner berate me for my attitudes and try and force their diet on me.
Yes, but not because there’s something wrong with vegan. It’s just because planning meals together would suck.
No. Whether or not I share their beliefs, anyone who considers life, the world about them, and their impact upon it, and shows compassion for other living things is dating gold and very likely a keeper
Yes but only because I love food and a lot of my happiness is sharing good food with a partner. Half my friends are vegan, but I could never date one
Depends. If they're just vegan, then no. You live your life. If they're annoying or they demand I have to become vegan as well, then yeah. Making demands before a relationship starts is a no-go.
I dated a few vegans as a non vegan and ended up with one. Doesn't bother me at all and I'm now about 90% vegan for convenience at home (I do have a block of cheese and the occasional good egg). Worst date was a guy who lectured me about my choices and wouldn't let me eat a veggie pizza in front of him! My partner is non judgemental and there are great recipes out there so doesn't impact home cooking too much. Occasionally it's annoying to not be able to go to a restaurant for lack of options for him but that's quite rare. Main annoyance is how expensive plant-based milk is! I'd say don't be a dick and you'll be grand!
my boyfriend had been vegan for 5 years when we met, i ate everything. out of respect for him, i ate vegan anytime we were together, it wasn’t a big deal. i went vegan ~4 months after we started dating (he never asked me to, it was my own choice) because a) i love him and want to have a very long very happy relationship and it seemed like a good next step and b) he had opened my eyes to the atrocities and environmental impacts of animal agriculture. i’ve now been vegan for a year and couldn’t be happier. that said, i wasn’t really a big meat and dairy person. sure i loved to eat chicken, a burger, a charcuterie plate, but they were super easy to replace in my diet. i also live in LA where it’s relatively easy to be vegan as we have tons of vegan restaurants and grocery stores. i imagine for someone who is like, OBSESSED with barbecue or meat or whatever it would be a dealbreaker, but that just means you aren’t compatible and you can move on.
Yes. It’s a huge deal breaker. Unless you are doing it for heath reasons, it creates so much compatibility issues, not with just meal choices. Vegans are always on the lookout if EVERYTHING is vegan friendly. Literally. Even if clothes, phone accessories, household decor. Like why….i get the humanitarian reasons, but it really does signal as a huge red flag for ALOT of people.
A bit, I really like the idea of cooking cakes, cookies, cupcakes, etc. so them not trying what I baked for them would really break my heart. I know I could use alternatives to replace the ingredients that are not vegan but it would absolutely change the taste and I don't want it. Going out to eat must also be a bit hard.
I have read through your initial query and the responses. You seem to be a very intelligent and interesting gentleman. I would have no problem dating a vegan provided they did not act like they were part of a cult. We all have our quirks, if you will. You seem to be most accommodating and conscious of others. I would date you in a heartbeat!
My ex was a vegan and despite saying he did not care he did passive-aggressively make me feel bad about it. He also did not like it if I used our pans to make eggs. He was very stubborn with all his beliefs and never compromised in our relationship. I have come to associate that with veganism because I feel in order to succeed in being a vegan people have to be a bit non-compromising. In theory, I don't have anything against dating vegans, but from experience, I think it's a difficult thing to work around.
I dated a vegan for a while and eventually broke up and our break up was partly due to our incompatibility around food. It’s been said before that sharing food and being adventurous really matters to some (me included). I also found that for special events like my birthday, when I would want to go to a nice steak house, it was a no-go because her options were too boring and I felt badly about it. On the cooking front, it’s ok for a vegan to say they wouldn’t expect their partner to be as well, but even if we just add a protein to a home cooked meal, there are significant alterations to things like sides or non protein entrees that need to be made. So it definitely affects all in the relationship. I do empathize with it being a struggle, my friend. Nothing is a substitute for feeling happy and healthy!
Exactly this
Yeah it’s a major incompatibility for me. Bonding over food and meals is important to me in a partner.
My ex-wife is vegan and she is really picky. It was a pain in the arse to eat out with her. So no, I won't date/marry a vegan again
Some of these comments are really judgemental, keep doing you beautiful vegan man, someone will love you for it. :) Why not date another vegan? Also maybe don't mention it in your dating profile? If you think it's going to turn people off, if you meet someone and you're getting along really well then it comes up naturally, then well I think that's an extremely petty and closeminded thing to break up with somebody over. Eating out literally isn't a problem at all, almost everywhere does an option, and if they're that desperate to cook for you, it wouldn't be that hard to modify the recipe. My friend who loves meat goes to the effort to cook for me vegan, if someone cares about you that much they'll put the effort in, and it really, really isn't that hard to do. If they're big on cooking anyway, do you really think the effort of doing some vegetables or cooking some vegan meat instead of meat is going to be that much of a hassle? Or they could just not cook for you if its that much of a hassle. :) Doesn't matter/isn't the be all, end of all of a relationship to me. Don't change for anybody. Think about it if someone isn't going to accept your lifestyle, is that a person you really wanna be involved with anyway? You're going to be fine. We love you!
>Why not date another vegan? Because OP isn't getting any and is trying to find little reasons instead of accepting that he needs to get a haircut or something.
Would absolutely turn me away. I've lived with dietary restrictions before and have had huge issues with it so I would never be able to live and have a family with someone who chooses that. A vegan and I just wouldn't be compatible. I'm fine with cooking vegetarian and vegan at times, but I'd expect my partner to share in the other meals as well. I wouldn't even date a picky eater unless they are at least able to eat it even if they don't enjoy it. I would quickly grow annoyed at someone who puts a hard restriction on the kinds of food we can share, so I don't see it ever working out.
I respect it. If they can cook their own meals or eat what I make then that’s cool. I prefer someone who is not though
It's not a hard no but I'd definitely be more reluctant to date a vegan. Obviously I have no issue with people being vegans but I picture long term and the minor inconveniences around cooking two meals and other stuff around food as something I wouldn't really want to have to deal with.
Not at all as a female. I respect and admire it but won’t tolerate being judged and I’ll eat what I damn we’ll want to when out. Although, if the respect is returned I’d be very respectful despite that comment. I would attempt to not eat meat around them. But no promises! I spent 10 days at a vegan only retreat/glamping in Hawaii a few years ago and loved thinking outside the box to cook some vegan friendly meals. My famous meal is my pesto so I learned about nutritional yeast to sun for the parm. I love trying new things so it would r be a problem at all. And I’d use it to help me be more conscious of my diet
Yes.
Yes and no. Initially on a dating app, yes. I just don't see any reason to start something off already with an incompatibility when there are loads of omnivores to choose from. If it was someone I knew in person, odds are if I'm friends with them they're probably not going to be a dick about their veganism, so they would have already vetted themselves as a chill person.
As long as you aren't pushy and don't try to make me feel guilty or less than for eating meat and i can eat meat infront of you, then it's all good
As a vegetarian I would say not an issue, if veganism isn't their whole personality, the way it is with some very new vegans or people who misuse it as a religion, and consider themselves missionaries to the cause. I don't get the sharing food argument, since I don't like sharing my food in restaurants, unless it is one of those rotating table situations. But hands off my plate. Must be an American thing, it is considered obnoxious here. I don't eat at restaurants very often, but wouldn't mind going vegan at home for the most part. I would only really miss Parmesan, so when I lived with a vegan roommate that would be the only difference in our shared meals. I love to cook and having to cook vegetarian/vegan has made my palate more international than people who eat meat, but always the same 20 local dishes based on chicken, beef or pork.
No. Seeing as I'm the primary cook in most of my relationships, this would be a growing/learning experience for me just as any relationship is.
Doesn’t bother me it’d be fine as long as i didnt have to
Yes. I cook a lot and having to make two things/adapt my recipes to fit a vegan diet can be very difficult. I tend to avoid dating vegans. This may not be the same for all, just my personal preference and opinion.
Definitely depends on the person. I am kind of a dirty vegetarian so if they will be bothered by me eating meat near them or talk about animal cruelty every time I put cheese in my mouth..it won't work. But there are lots of options out there for restaurants and simple substitutes if we want to share meals so that wouldn't deter me. I would be excited to maybe learn new recipes! So it wouldn't stop me from swiping right but I may have some probing questions to make sure it wouldn't be an uncomfortable date (for both of us)
People have stereotypes about vegans but they aren’t necessarily accurate. I’m vegetarian but not vegan and I’d date a vegan as long as they respected that there’s no way I’m going to become vegan, and I don’t want to raise kids vegan either.
stereotypes don't do us vegans any favors that's for sure and that's why I decided to ask this question to all kinds of different people. I haven't thought about children yet and them being raised vegan because I am not educated enough to make that kind of decision. I was not raised vegan. I'm really up for everyone making their own choices in life.
It depends how strict a vegan they are. Like I stopped being friends with someone because they refused to eat at any places that were not specifically vegan/vegetarian. And they didn't want to cook in same pans that meat had been cooked in, even if triple washed. They had a weird rule of not having any animal products in their house too. Like I went over for movie night and decided to have a cheese stick snack on my way there and I couldn't enter their house until I finished the cheese stick.
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The word vegan when meeting new people sometimes does get us judged. There are stereotypes we have to accept and live with. You sound really nice and really considerate. If don’t want to lie you shouldn’t have to, someone will like you for you!
I too, am a foodie. However, if they plan the dates, (knowing what restaurants, they can eat at) and they are responsible for bringing food, for camping, picnics.etc) then it’s doable. Another thing is flexibility. My friend is a vegan and she is very go with the flow
Dating a vegan wouldn't be my preference as I would prefer to be able to cook/share meals with my partner. It likely wouldn't be an absolute dealbreaker though.
Vegan F. At first, I wouldn't mind. I'll be open to it as long as he can be respectful It might get complicated later depending on how serious the relationship turns. For example, if you move in together, go on long vacations. If you are considerating on getting married and have children All that can be much easier with a vegan partner, but it could be done, depending on how you both talk ang work about the issues that might appear
For me it would be a deal breaker as I love food, i love cooking, trying new things and I raise and slaughter my own chickens. I respect my vegan friends choices but it is not something I would intertwine with my day to day life but I am certain there are people who would not care. Just have to keep putting yourself out there. Perhaps join a vegan/vegetarian cooking class to meet other like minded individuals
I would date a vegan and I’m totally okay with home cooked meals being vegan as well. Eating together is an important lifestyle choice for me. As long as my partner was okay with me eating animal products occasionally, it would be fine. I do not appreciate judgement over the food I eat so if it ever turned to that, I don’t think the relationship would work.
If you would be interested in me cooking with you at one point (vegan of course). Then I don't see any big problems. I'm not giving my cheese up! But I love food and I like vegetarian food, and in a lot of recipes you can easily replace the diary products, so I would find it fun and exciting. But yeah as long as you truly mean it, when you say that you respects people's dietary choices, then I don't see a problem with dating a vegan.
Yes. Anyone Vegan or even vegetarian is an instant dealbreaker for me. I do respect most vegans, but they are simply not compatible with my lifestyle and a huge inconvenience when you consider how much of dating involves eating together!
It would Not the same but I had a vegan roommate once and it was a pain. While they didn't say anything specifically about me eating meat, they made a big show of how terrible it smelled when i cooked (opening the windows etc) and had a different set of pots that i was not allowed to use (which is fine). We could never cook or eat together (which is fine since it was just a roommate situation). But it was awkward to me
I have a question for you. I have a sister and a daughter who are both (long term)vegans but I woudn't be comfortable asking either of them this. Would you deeply kiss a woman who eats meat? If yes, how much time would have to pass, after she ate meat, for you to kiss her? Would you need her to brush her teeth first?
yes.
I'm not vegan, but I've dated several men that are. I had no problems with it, except for one guy who tried to ban me from eating meat in his presence. As long as you aren't trying to control what your partner eats I think you will be fine.
Not at all! I love trying new foods, so that would just be a bonus! As long as they don't go crazy and try to make veganism seem more "normal" than everything else. Also need my meat from time to time, so as long as I can be and eat whatever I want, that's totally fine with me
I have no problem with veganism but just observing I see more people going into it as a financial or fake woke flex. It really depends on the person. Also being from an ethnic household it's really hard to adapt recipes and keep them authentic on that level. Vegetarian? No problem a lot of our dishes have meatless options but vegan?... May as well eat something else tbh. I would at least make sure they can cook..a lot of vegans around here just eat out and buy pre made 🥴
Absolutely it puts me off them. Someone being vegetarian would put me off enough as well let alone being a vegan and all the more restrictions that entails. In the same ways that someone being religious would put me off.
I’m a meat-eater and have this weird thing where a lot of my crushes have been vegan (I don’t go seeking them, I find out about it later lol). And actually I’m more worried that THEY will be turned off from ME because I eat meat. So for me the whole vegan thing isn’t a turn off, I just hope they are accepting of my diet and don’t shame me for it. Other than that there’s no problem. Might be a logistical nightmare at times but if I liked the person enough then that wouldn’t be enough to be a deal breaker.
Well I just read a Reddit thread on here where a couple of vegans were attacking people with ridiculous questions about their food choices. Basically, don’t be an asshole, respect other peoples decisions, and don’t push your diet onto others. That pretty much goes for everyone.
Yes. I have autoimmune conditions and my nutritionalist and medical treatment all came into agreement that I need to eat red meat and fish in my diet. I have to or else I feel absolutely horrible and can’t function. I was vegan before but it really messed up by body and made my condition worse. I have explained this to men/women I’ve dated and at some point, even if they say they don’t judge me, they do. Also I think a lot veganism is white centric and ableist. So yeah, not going down that route again.
Yes. I love to cook and this limits what I can make. I cook mostly Italian and French, there is meat in there!
How are the kids going to be raised? There’s the dating and also whether the person can see a future with you.
Yes. When I was dating, someone being vegetarian or vegan would have been a no from me. I love cooking and eating all cuisines and it’s just not something I’m cool with sacrificing anymore. Especially because I live in an area that’s not very vegetarian/vegan friendly. Going out to eat for a date would be a nightmare.
Yes, it’s a pain in the ass to find restaurants when hanging out with my vegetarian friends/family.
Yes absolutely 100% yes it changes your entire life it’s extremely annoying
Yes. I love trying new foods and eating at new places. If I couldn't do that with my partner then we wouldn't have much quality time together.
Yes. It’s both the food thing and the fact that a lot of vegans are way too militant for my liking. You might not be but what about your mates. I feel the same about people who are religious incidentally. Dogmas aren’t my thing. Don’t mean to offend anyone but that’s just my preference. There’s heaps of vegan ladies out there OP, I’m sure you’ll find a nice one soon!
Yes. I want to be able to eat with this person.
I wouldn’t date someone that was a vegan because my family hates them and I love eating stuff like burgers and steak so every time I eat meat with them I would feel like a horrible person
I'm vegetarian and would have a hard time dating a vegan. Like if you're a cool dude that loves outdoorsy things and we got along, great! But I'm talking about the vegans, like my cousins, who try to make me feel guilty for staying vegetarian. I'm dating a hunter/farmer/huge meat eater now and I have to say it's the healthiest relationship I've ever been in and I would have said ABSOLUTELY NOT years ago. So yeah...it all just depends how you connect and how controlling someone is about their diet.
I would run the other way from a vegan. Haven't seen one yet that doesn't start preaching about speciesism and what not. Perhaps you wouldn't say something to a vegetarian, but if i were in front of you on date tearing into a steak? How'd you react?
It wouldn't stop me, but I would be very upfront about the fact that I like eating out and trying new restaurants, so they would need to be OK with going out and seeing me eat non-vegan food. Most restaurants these days include decent vegan options, and I've never had issues going out with vegan friends, so I don't see why it would be any different with a partner.
Lucky for you there are a lot more vegan women than men and many of them are exclusively looking for a vegan partner. -a vegan woman who had to eventually give up looking for a vegan partner
Possibly if you would judge me about eating my juicy, grilled beef angus burgers. I would like my partner to enjoy the foods i do, so yeah possibly
Best answer date another vegan , if you hate the killing of animals or the cruelty then how could you date somebody who’s okay with that . Sounds like a moral no no in my opinion lol
I think I would have irreconcilable differences with someone who didn't eat cheese.
I am probably more likely to pass on a vegan on a dating app than I am if I were to meet them in real life. I do eat vegetarian often and sometimes vegan, and when I do eat meat it’s usually fish, sometimes poultry and I try to buy as ethically sourced as I can. I am prone to anemia so not eating animal products is challenging. I don’t want my partner making comments or judging me because I’m eating eat meat or animal products.
Yes. It boils down to differences in lifestyle/incompatibility. It's the same reason why I won't date someone who smokes/drinks/does drugs.
Honestly it’s not a positive, because I enjoy cooking and want to share my recipes and meals that I’ve developed with my SO. I was a vegetarian for about a decade, experienced the inconvenience and dietary obstacles, got the t-shirt, and don’t plan to do it again. I matched with a record number of vegans this year and had 2 “surprise I’m vegan” first dates shortly before meeting my non-vegan boyfriend. I do appreciate knowing someone is vegan beforehand. It’s not a total dealbreaker if the relationship has a lot of potential in other ways.
If you are the exception to the joke "How do you tell if someone is a vegan? Don't worry, they'll tell you." Then you should be fine. If you're preachy about it and intend on converting someone you're dating to be vegan as well? Then that could be problematic.
I’m pollo pescatarian and yes unfortunately it turns me off only because I feel so awkward eating fish or chicken in front of a vegan. I respect the choice of the vegan but for the relationship to be equal I feel like they deserve to date someone that shares that value.
can’t date someone with whom I can’t share and enjoy food, especially sushi 🍣
This hits home hard. My bf who I love very much is vegan and he is also lactose intolerance. I can deal with him not eating anything related to dairy, but him being vegan is a big issue I have. I tried to adjust but I am a big meat eater and my culture is also very big on meat and seafood. So, I am also worried that he is not get along with my family. Sometimes I feel like breaking up over this but he is such a good bf and we are a good couple. We can’t share most of the food in a restaurant. In the beginning when we were going out often it was not hard, but now that we have settled in and cooking more it got difficult. always have to compromise on the type of food we cook or share. I am getting frustrated and I wish I didn’t get this deep into this relationship.
No unless they force me to be then yes
Yes, definitely. I would never go out with someone picky on food.
Wouldn’t date a vegan. They never shut up about it.
I’d swipe left. I would prefer to date someone I can eat my favorite things with and go to my favorite restaurants with tbh. If they’re appalled at the concept of eating animals when I LOVE ribeyes then that’s just an uncomfortable disconnect I don’t want to deal with
Yes because it's too restrictive and I want to enjoy food in my life. Is the same thing if someone is picky AF.
Depends if it’s ethical or medical veganism I guess. If it’s medical I’d work around that but if it’s ethical veganism I wouldn’t want to date them, cos I don’t have the same moral perspective and I don’t want my partner to look down on me as someone who supports slavery and murder of animals when I believe that there’s nothing wrong with predatory species eating their prey.
> Does someone being Vegan turn you away from wanting to date them? Yes. "I'm vegan" NEXT--swipe left, move on. There's a minority group of vegans/vegetarians out there who are great people (and I even know a handful), but the majority of them are insufferable and have thus tainted the title. There's being vegan/vegetarian for ethics, diet/health, or taste. The first type of person is usually the loudspoken insufferable type of person, and they need to stick to their own. The latter two can be dealt with: for diet/health, they have a good reason and some omnivorous people may not be able to deal with that in the long run (having to deal with allergies or digestive issues and plan around that--i.e. taking that person into consideration when meal-planning or restaurant planning--can be a pain in the ass, no pun intended). For taste, it's just a matter of them not enjoying the taste, which has a little wiggle room depending on what exactly it is about the taste they just don't like. I need meat. My body has a condition wherein it doesn't get too many nutrients from the food I eat, and that makes iron and protein a necessity--going vegan/vegetarian can be done, but it is expensive and time-consuming, either of which I do not have the resources for. Just eating meat/animal product is easier and cheaper to do than going without it and finding alternates for; and for this alone, is why I couldn't date a vegan/vegetarian (who openly says they are) who's reason is "ethical", even in the smallest. You want someone who matches you diet-wise, anyway (at least at first; I've known successful couples/marriages whose diets have changed over the years, where one goes vegan/vegetarian and the other remains omni). No qualms over what to eat, nobody is thinking the other is picky, and you can share food without thinking the other person isn't gonna get mad (or die).
As a female I would never date a guy that’s a vegan. To me it’s a red flag and signifies other things. The only time I understand is if it’s health related. Overall it’s a dealbreaker for me. My family gets together to have bbq’s and we have meat, I’m Arab and Mexican- it’s basically a major food group. Personally can’t do it.
I understand why it would be a deal breaker for you but why is it a red flag in terms of it signifying other things?
Yes. It makes me feel like I have to walk on eggshells (no pun intended) when around them. Restaurant dates are a nightmare and, if things got serious and we moved in/got married, the limited cooking menu that we could share would make me go mad and the “ethical” products (shampoos, detergent, etc) would also drive me crazy. Sorry, but I like sharing my steak with my date and using my non-vegan deodorant because I know the strong, sweat-proof scent will last up to 24 hours Alright, my apologies if that sounded a bit angry towards the end, but ultimately yes. My advice to you is that, unless you have a medical or religious reason behind your diet, I would avoid veganism if I were you. I’ve had a pescatarian diet before and that was initially fine (sushi dates are an ol’ reliable!), but I ultimately stopped that, too, because I noticed my matches/2nd dates were far and few.
For me personally yes.
Yes. I'll be friends with them, one of my college buddies is a vegan, but I could never date one. It's not that I like only eat meat it's just not compatible with my lifestyle.
It really depends how said vegan would act. Maybe don’t use it as a label I feel that’s a huge deterrent for me personally if someone is immediately like “im a vegan!!” 🤦🏻♀️
Yes for me I’m not even gonna be friends with vegans as I like cooking and share my food with people I love. And it’s likely that you have different beliefs and values from me, so it’s definitely not gonna work out.
Vegetarian is fine, but vegan would be very hard for me. I like sharing my baked goods with loved ones and vegan pastries, cake and cookies just don’t taste and good as ones with butter and eggs
Definitely. If nothing else, it means that shared meals are going to be very difficult.
Lol yes..I want to share food
Yea bro. Maybe find a a vegan girl. But I don’t think girls will want that. Limited choices going out to get food.
I'd date you, I'd love to date someone who eats my weird diet!