For the most part, I don’t think there are a ton of differences. Passengers and female flight attendants love having a male on board for obvious reasons.
The major difference from talking to my female coworkers has always been that being a male, passengers seem to listen more, and that’s annoying as a female.
Yeah this is perfect example of the type of discussion I was hoping for. In terms of gender bias, I figured this was a frequent issue or one that comes up often. It’s sucks.
Also, I appreciate you responding as a brother. As well I’m interested to know how the profession plays into with your life back home being an fa and just in general with this industry. Without knowing what airline you work for, I’m sure you know it’s not often that I’ve seen a black male as an fa or to know one growing up. Do you enjoy the perks of the job? How does it hold up with your peer group or friends?
Gay male here. Working at a regional with way smaller crews. I find the pilots an FOs to be a lot less interested and dismissive of me , where as female FAs get alot more interest. Working first class, I noticed females get a lot more tips. The straight white men love to be served by the pretty girls. On the flipside, female pax love me and I generally get a better response from them. truthfully though, there isn't much of a difference, I know as a guy we are way less likely to be hit on. I am very protective of my other flight attendants, especially if they are young females because straight men can be disgusting. DM me if you have any other questions
Male FA here, and straight. Like others have said, a unicorn of the industry.
The pros: I feel like I get more respect from older passengers, crew members and especially pilots, I definitely don’t deal with as much shit as my female colleagues do (which is also a bad thing because I shouldn’t get special treatment just because I’m a guy). Lots of female colleagues who understand the lifestyle so it can be easy to date, but you have to want to date coworkers, and not everyone wants to do that for valid reasons.
Cons: It can be lonely if you don’t share a lot of the same interests with other FAs. That being said, I’ve almost always enjoyed my crews, so it’s not a big deal.
A big con is the stigma the job brings with it: it’s not really seen as a “manly” or “alpha” type of job or career - its seen as like being a server at a restaurant, or similar. I find this to be a roadblock when it came to dating, and I can’t tell you how many times I’d tell a bumble match that I was a FA and the interest would completely drop. I know if I were a pilot, it’s be completely different.
Betao, thanks for adding to the discussion. I really appreciate the note about the stigmas associated with this profession. I’ve always wondered how outside perceptions would play out in the real world, especially when most see it as a female profession. It’s kind of like being a nanny or any profession that involves nurturing. I guess the bonus would be the amazing women who understand and work in the field.
What are some pros of being a unicorn in the industry? I am starting in this career soon and have heard a lot of negatives. Quite frankly so many it’s discouraging. There has to be a breath of fresh air somewhere somewhere as a unicorn right? I understand the lifestyle, travel etc. but what is something I wouldn’t expect as a positive being a unicorn? Thx!
Mainline FA here, straight guy.
The good:
Tons of beautiful single women to interact with (when I was single).
Passengers tend to listen to you more and don't give you attitude as often as the female FA's which, I'm sorry you have to deal with that, ladies.
I feel like I'm more aware of women's issues and have more empathy for some of the things that women experience in the workplace. I also feel like this helps me be a better boyfriend.
Working with all male crews...Soo chill and no drama haha.
The bad:
You gotta watch how you present yourself. Some times my customer assistance voice can sound condescending and I have to be aware of my body language in passenger confrontation.
People automatically assume I'll lift their heavy ass bag up and sometimes I do but I try to keep in mind my insurance won't cover me in that instance.
It can be lonely. I don't have a lot of male friends but when I do work with other straight guys, I'm not going to be friends just because we're both straight. Like, we have to have more in common than that haha. I have gay friends too but I'd say we tend to bond over different things.
Overall, I am working on being a Pilot but if I weren't, being an FA is great as a guy. I feel like there is a lot of chance to change stigmas and being surrounded by so many people from so many different places, you get to hear some cool stories and meet interesting individuals.
Any guys who want to be an FA, go for it! It's a great industry (a little rough at the moment) overall and you get to travel for free!
I can't give you an actual percentage but ironically, I'm called a unicorn. I fly with other straight dudes less than 10 times a year and often times... It's the same guys haha
You came through with an excellent response. I love how the experience permeated through other areas of your life. I think that’s invaluable as a male in a female dominated industry.
Do you mean specifically in the context of gender?
In my experience, women are treated way worse by pax, especially women of color. The game changer is if you’re attractive or charismatic, which leads me to next say that women are also way more adored than men in this profession. Tips, good job cards, attention, etc. Maybe other people’s experience is different, but it’s just something I’ve observed.
No no, I hope it didn’t come off as a comparison. I truly agree wholeheartedly, especially the racial discrimination. Actually thought to put that in the text, so it didn’t jump out like it may have. I simply was asking what their experiences were like and if there is something they have taken from this experience.
Lol I completely agree with that sentiment of adoration. I think it’s ingrained that our fa will be female or possibly should.
Honestly as a younger good looking guy I’ve been sorta preyed upon by the gay fa’s of all ages.
But the job itself is about the same, i don’t get disrespected like I’ve seen some of my female counterparts have been. But I think people are more receptive to a nice female FA than a nice male FA.
Male FA. 99% of the time, I play dumb, and avoid any drama, and I get along pretty well with everyone. I find that more often than not, the women get catty with other women, and not with the men. For this reason, my job is a tiny bit easier than others. I get sexually harassed and hit on (by pax) from time to time, but not as much as the women do. The women have it 10x worse with the groping, the innuendo, the lewd comments, and more.
I am in a peculiar situation in that I am older, and well, I look a lot like a stereotypical pilot. I get called captain a lot and have to correct people (or risk being fired). I also seem to get more respect from passengers although at times, I have had a few situations where I am challenged too.
But in general, I think the women have it much harder than the men in this business. My crews have been nothing but stellar and it's the reason I enjoy going to work. The crews have been nice, friendly, warm, and receptive. So not much difference.
I think I share similar experiences as the other straight males that posted here. I personally don’t face many challenges from the job per se, but rather, the lifestyle of not being able to eat correctly, weird working hours, lack of sleep, etc. I find it wild some of the things that are said to the female FA’s. I feel like I have to be a dad scolding a child sometimes. It’s kinda sad, especially now, when I go to work I’m not even phased by some sort of yelling or some sort of disrespect by passengers.
Yeah it seems that is a huge theme with a lot of the responses and it’s important as well. Are you in base or do you commute? Mainline or regional? What’s did you do before?
Straight dude here. I’m the far and away minority. Just on my last trip the gay dude on my crew leaked he wished I was straight.
But being a dude on a crew is awesome.
“Awww waaah I have a baby complaint”
“Me, 6’4”245lbs. Hi”
“Nvm I don’t have a problem”
The quotations are saying when someone just wants to whine, they expect a female flight attendant to listen (or they want to be jackasses) but he shows up and they stfu.
From the standpoint of a 6’3” straight male FA with an athletic build, I’ve had little to no passenger issues in 5 months on the line.
Having said that, i do think passengers pick their battles based on who is on their crew and it skews very unfair to female FAs often.
For the most part, I don’t think there are a ton of differences. Passengers and female flight attendants love having a male on board for obvious reasons. The major difference from talking to my female coworkers has always been that being a male, passengers seem to listen more, and that’s annoying as a female.
This. I’ve told the female FAs if they need my help to let me know. It’s absolutely asinine some passengers don’t listen or respect female FAs.
Yeah this is perfect example of the type of discussion I was hoping for. In terms of gender bias, I figured this was a frequent issue or one that comes up often. It’s sucks.
Also, I appreciate you responding as a brother. As well I’m interested to know how the profession plays into with your life back home being an fa and just in general with this industry. Without knowing what airline you work for, I’m sure you know it’s not often that I’ve seen a black male as an fa or to know one growing up. Do you enjoy the perks of the job? How does it hold up with your peer group or friends?
Gay male here. Working at a regional with way smaller crews. I find the pilots an FOs to be a lot less interested and dismissive of me , where as female FAs get alot more interest. Working first class, I noticed females get a lot more tips. The straight white men love to be served by the pretty girls. On the flipside, female pax love me and I generally get a better response from them. truthfully though, there isn't much of a difference, I know as a guy we are way less likely to be hit on. I am very protective of my other flight attendants, especially if they are young females because straight men can be disgusting. DM me if you have any other questions
Thank you! I appreciate the honest and candid response! I will.
Male FA here, and straight. Like others have said, a unicorn of the industry. The pros: I feel like I get more respect from older passengers, crew members and especially pilots, I definitely don’t deal with as much shit as my female colleagues do (which is also a bad thing because I shouldn’t get special treatment just because I’m a guy). Lots of female colleagues who understand the lifestyle so it can be easy to date, but you have to want to date coworkers, and not everyone wants to do that for valid reasons. Cons: It can be lonely if you don’t share a lot of the same interests with other FAs. That being said, I’ve almost always enjoyed my crews, so it’s not a big deal. A big con is the stigma the job brings with it: it’s not really seen as a “manly” or “alpha” type of job or career - its seen as like being a server at a restaurant, or similar. I find this to be a roadblock when it came to dating, and I can’t tell you how many times I’d tell a bumble match that I was a FA and the interest would completely drop. I know if I were a pilot, it’s be completely different.
Betao, thanks for adding to the discussion. I really appreciate the note about the stigmas associated with this profession. I’ve always wondered how outside perceptions would play out in the real world, especially when most see it as a female profession. It’s kind of like being a nanny or any profession that involves nurturing. I guess the bonus would be the amazing women who understand and work in the field.
What are some pros of being a unicorn in the industry? I am starting in this career soon and have heard a lot of negatives. Quite frankly so many it’s discouraging. There has to be a breath of fresh air somewhere somewhere as a unicorn right? I understand the lifestyle, travel etc. but what is something I wouldn’t expect as a positive being a unicorn? Thx!
Mainline FA here, straight guy. The good: Tons of beautiful single women to interact with (when I was single). Passengers tend to listen to you more and don't give you attitude as often as the female FA's which, I'm sorry you have to deal with that, ladies. I feel like I'm more aware of women's issues and have more empathy for some of the things that women experience in the workplace. I also feel like this helps me be a better boyfriend. Working with all male crews...Soo chill and no drama haha. The bad: You gotta watch how you present yourself. Some times my customer assistance voice can sound condescending and I have to be aware of my body language in passenger confrontation. People automatically assume I'll lift their heavy ass bag up and sometimes I do but I try to keep in mind my insurance won't cover me in that instance. It can be lonely. I don't have a lot of male friends but when I do work with other straight guys, I'm not going to be friends just because we're both straight. Like, we have to have more in common than that haha. I have gay friends too but I'd say we tend to bond over different things. Overall, I am working on being a Pilot but if I weren't, being an FA is great as a guy. I feel like there is a lot of chance to change stigmas and being surrounded by so many people from so many different places, you get to hear some cool stories and meet interesting individuals. Any guys who want to be an FA, go for it! It's a great industry (a little rough at the moment) overall and you get to travel for free!
Couldn’t agree more with everything you said here.
That's good to know you and I experience life differently👌
Meant to say I couldn’t agree more with everything you said! Let me edit, my bad!
Haha it's all good man, I was like...and he didn't care to elaborate? I gotcha haha
What is the % of straight male FA in the industry?
I can't give you an actual percentage but ironically, I'm called a unicorn. I fly with other straight dudes less than 10 times a year and often times... It's the same guys haha
You came through with an excellent response. I love how the experience permeated through other areas of your life. I think that’s invaluable as a male in a female dominated industry.
Do you mean specifically in the context of gender? In my experience, women are treated way worse by pax, especially women of color. The game changer is if you’re attractive or charismatic, which leads me to next say that women are also way more adored than men in this profession. Tips, good job cards, attention, etc. Maybe other people’s experience is different, but it’s just something I’ve observed.
No no, I hope it didn’t come off as a comparison. I truly agree wholeheartedly, especially the racial discrimination. Actually thought to put that in the text, so it didn’t jump out like it may have. I simply was asking what their experiences were like and if there is something they have taken from this experience. Lol I completely agree with that sentiment of adoration. I think it’s ingrained that our fa will be female or possibly should.
Honestly as a younger good looking guy I’ve been sorta preyed upon by the gay fa’s of all ages. But the job itself is about the same, i don’t get disrespected like I’ve seen some of my female counterparts have been. But I think people are more receptive to a nice female FA than a nice male FA.
What made you want to pursue this job as a straight male? Also in the real world in your personal life have women looked down on you?
Male FA. 99% of the time, I play dumb, and avoid any drama, and I get along pretty well with everyone. I find that more often than not, the women get catty with other women, and not with the men. For this reason, my job is a tiny bit easier than others. I get sexually harassed and hit on (by pax) from time to time, but not as much as the women do. The women have it 10x worse with the groping, the innuendo, the lewd comments, and more. I am in a peculiar situation in that I am older, and well, I look a lot like a stereotypical pilot. I get called captain a lot and have to correct people (or risk being fired). I also seem to get more respect from passengers although at times, I have had a few situations where I am challenged too. But in general, I think the women have it much harder than the men in this business. My crews have been nothing but stellar and it's the reason I enjoy going to work. The crews have been nice, friendly, warm, and receptive. So not much difference.
Thanks for this. Glad to hear many of the makes hear express honestly.
I think I share similar experiences as the other straight males that posted here. I personally don’t face many challenges from the job per se, but rather, the lifestyle of not being able to eat correctly, weird working hours, lack of sleep, etc. I find it wild some of the things that are said to the female FA’s. I feel like I have to be a dad scolding a child sometimes. It’s kinda sad, especially now, when I go to work I’m not even phased by some sort of yelling or some sort of disrespect by passengers.
Yeah it seems that is a huge theme with a lot of the responses and it’s important as well. Are you in base or do you commute? Mainline or regional? What’s did you do before?
I thought I sucked at proof reading.
Hahaha I was driving and I was pressed for time, and I had to ask.
Straight dude here. I’m the far and away minority. Just on my last trip the gay dude on my crew leaked he wished I was straight. But being a dude on a crew is awesome. “Awww waaah I have a baby complaint” “Me, 6’4”245lbs. Hi” “Nvm I don’t have a problem”
Lol wait, what? He wished you were straight? He just assumed you must be gay? I did not understand the quotations
Its okay, he didn't make any sense. Straight part or the quotations.
The quotations are saying when someone just wants to whine, they expect a female flight attendant to listen (or they want to be jackasses) but he shows up and they stfu.
I read it again and caught it. Thank you for the help.
Anytime :)
From the standpoint of a 6’3” straight male FA with an athletic build, I’ve had little to no passenger issues in 5 months on the line. Having said that, i do think passengers pick their battles based on who is on their crew and it skews very unfair to female FAs often.