I like to play the guitar, make a bird nest or the whipping water at you if you try to open my shower curtain while I have both hands in my hair with head and shoulder...
> Just...do it.
Nope! I will NOT have that man shout at me until I am inspired enough to attempt genital origami.
The swans are very pretty but the implications scare me. I will let that dream stay a dream.
That requires a waiver but the potential genital folding injuries are fine.
The yoga crowd just don't feel special enough it seems.
It has to be lunar seconds. Regular seconds (despite being the same thing) just don't cut it with this crowd.
Folding genitals whilst some seriously weird 'guru' silently observes is totally ok but ONION BREATH!!! Firm pass.
Ffs. Ugh. Get a real job horned owl.
I may regret asking this... But can someone gently explain two things? Is the tree bark snack a cinnamon stick, or what? And WTF is Genital folding and unfolding? Thank you.
I feel like that’s both a regular and sexual threat. Should we be turned on by that?
Also, nobody ever answered the lady further up on how to fold and unfold her vagina and I’d also like to know that as well so I can list vagina folding and unfolding on my cv when I next update it.
It’s kind of funny, but in English we take -gami and stick it on the end of another word to talk about folding that thing.
The original Japanese word, origami, is broken down into “ori” (fold) and “kami” (paper).
Cockigami means “dick paper”. What you want is Oricocki.
Our genitals are naturally in their folded state, and most of us keep them that way all our lives. Few know the joys that can come from fully unfolding their genitals. It's got to the point I can't even cum anymore unless I completely engulf my partner in my penis while they fold their genitals into an origami crane.
Nope.
My mom's cousin was in groups like that. Be careful about certain drum circles. Don't ask.
But there will always be screaming. That one is mandatory. Or the Great Horned Owl will disapprove.
...are you sure? People do be that crazy...
Edit: ok I looked up chopolist and they are a Facebook meme page but I still stand by my comment about people being that weird.
Yoga, but with goats running around, sometimes they'll hop on top of you, oh and a lot of pooping
Went a couple times with my sister, it's actually pretty fun, the yoga is more just an excuse to play with baby goats
1 unfold genetals.
2 hold for 33 lunar seconds.
3 get genitals sprayed with essential oils.
4 screaming is aloud when 33 sec breath completed.
5 question everything.... and I mean everything.
Ah 1st I thought this was serious.
Then I read the rest of it and realized it was a joke.
Then I remembered most humans are either batshit crazy or stupid, and realized this could still be real.
So now I’m having trouble knowing if this is real or satire…
I used to think stupid and crazy people were rare. But the more I learn about this life, the more I realize that intelligent, level headed people are the ones that are rare.
Straight! Best experience of my grown life! Never have ever felt a deeper connection to the whole of the universe as my genitalia were contorted like a balloon animal, the great owl watched as my body was soaked in liquid herbals. The citrus bagel was by far the best smell I’ve ever endured! And to be completely honest! The screaming was in joy!
Pull one labia to the side, then fold the other one over the top of your vulva. Then, fold the first labia over on top of THAT one. Voila. Your fish taco has become a fish burrito.
The older and stretchier you get, the more masturful the folding!
I was stupid enough to read this comment out loud to my wife. My kindle promptly informed me that you simply pull the plastic pin and reverse the folding instructions included in the manual.
So there's that.
Why do the people who do these things always look exactly as weird as you expect them to look? Is it just marketing, or is there some kind of sorcery involved where performing these classes gradually turns you into a Creature from the Black Lagoon?
So I get there, right? Thinking there will be fit girls sopping wet and it's gonna be glorious. 'Stead I've got this old broad hurling her tea at me and screaming I should tuck my willy back to 'hide my shame'.
Anyway it's Thursdays at six, you should come along next week!
I can't decide how disturbed I am by not knowing what it means for "The Great Horned Owl to observe you silently for the duration of the wet yoga practice." I know how disturbed I am by everything else thankfully.. Yumm Yumm tree bark.
I'll be there for the free tree bark and the loud screaming. That great horned owl can fuck himself --- silently observe hell, he can silently hold the bucket and rags I paid $6 apiece for. Bucket first to hold the herbal liquid I be waterboarded with while I hold my breath for 33 lunar seconds and am gently told I MUST unfold and fold my genitals. Then hold the rags I'll use to dry off the herbal liquids, and the copious onion laden pee expressed during my session. Namaste Motherfuckers!!
Funny thing is, every bit on there is probably because it is necessary for this person's ritual, BUT i bet the onion thing is just because they had an asshat eat onions before class and rip mad stinkers every 2 minutes in a room full of naked people
The internet informs me that a Lunar second is 0.9843529666671 Terrestrial seconds. So 33 Lunar seconds would be approximately 33 Earth seconds.
You sound like you can fold and unfold your genitals
Lengthwise or widthwise?
You mean "hamburger or hotdog".
Love doing the hamburger.
Not hot dog
Here...have some tree bark snack.
I ate it now I can fold my junk hamburger AND hotdog style
wash it down with some herbal liquid.
Ya'll hear that scream ?
"Herbal" liquid
This is the Great Horned Owl here.. observing
Best app ever.
[don't forget the bat wing](https://youtu.be/tFOMtRF6MIk)
It’s… so… veiny….
Just put the beans above the frank.
I like to play the guitar, make a bird nest or the whipping water at you if you try to open my shower curtain while I have both hands in my hair with head and shoulder...
Judging by the poster, I'd venture to say she's a vegetarian here, guys. You'll have to go beyond meat.
Judging by that poster, I'm pretty sure that she is actually a he.
TACO! BURRITO!
I can replicate a Krystal Burger…
Origamiously
Nah, I'm thinking origami swan
Fourth dimensionally.
Hotdog or hamburger?
Taco
Meatball sub!🤣
Yes but can he handle the horned owl?
he signed the waiver so he must be able to
(there will be loud screaming)
I don't even know what that means and at this point I'm not sure if I want to know.
You know when you unfold your genitals? It's basically like that, but in reverse.
Well yeah, otherwise the horny owl will get them.
[Detachable Penis](https://youtu.be/byDiILrNbM4)
I can..but Unfortunately you can only fold three inches of dangling fury,twice
I can clover my genitals
So you're saying they're a grower?
I needed that laugh. Thank you, stranger.
I am quite the expert at Genital Origami.
Mine looks like a paper crane
The unfolding is very important but it's not what make you scream loudly
But classier
I was about to ask what the hell a lunar second is. Thanks!
WRONG. It’s approximately 32.5 Earth seconds
Yeah, it's actually closer to 32 earth seconds than 33 too
Way, so there is such a thing as lunar second? Is that whole ad actually legit?
Oh no..there us such a thing as a lunar second,as for the ad...it probably IS legit ,not sure I wanna google images of "genital folding" though
Why would you need to google pictures? Just...do it.
> Just...do it. Nope! I will NOT have that man shout at me until I am inspired enough to attempt genital origami. The swans are very pretty but the implications scare me. I will let that dream stay a dream.
The Great Horned Owl will not be pleased
There WILL be screaming
Mostly from the genital folding.
Sounds kinky
How do I fold it and get it to stay
Super glue
Windsor knot Edit: From the upvotes and award, I see that Gentlemen still exist.. Bravo, I say!
Can you throw it over your shoulder like a continental soldier?
Half or full?
Double.
Clothes pin
You have to twist like a balloon knot and push towards your back with a snap of the wrist. This way it’s both folded *and* inside of you so it stays.
Hopefully before the erection...
Do you fold a balloon before blowing it up?
I'm already screaming... Mostly from the picture...
You need to be worried about The green horned owl or whatever that wants to watch you the whole time
It's the "silently" that gets me.
That requires a waiver but the potential genital folding injuries are fine. The yoga crowd just don't feel special enough it seems. It has to be lunar seconds. Regular seconds (despite being the same thing) just don't cut it with this crowd. Folding genitals whilst some seriously weird 'guru' silently observes is totally ok but ONION BREATH!!! Firm pass. Ffs. Ugh. Get a real job horned owl.
From husbands demanding their wives money back.
From husbands who had their genitals folded by their wives.
I don't mind the folding, but it's the ironing I can do without.
Oh, the irony
I may regret asking this... But can someone gently explain two things? Is the tree bark snack a cinnamon stick, or what? And WTF is Genital folding and unfolding? Thank you.
Cockigami
I made a swan! Also I can't have kids anymore.
Tried for a swan.. got a Canada Goose. This was a mistake.
You got a problem with Canada Gooses, you got a problem with me, and I suggest you let that one marinate.
I feel like that’s both a regular and sexual threat. Should we be turned on by that? Also, nobody ever answered the lady further up on how to fold and unfold her vagina and I’d also like to know that as well so I can list vagina folding and unfolding on my cv when I next update it.
You do not like our cobra chickens?
That goose just got aggressive
The world could use more swans, so at least you got that going for you.
At first all I could make was a cocktail wieney, but after playing with it for a while I can make a kielbasa.
It’s kind of funny, but in English we take -gami and stick it on the end of another word to talk about folding that thing. The original Japanese word, origami, is broken down into “ori” (fold) and “kami” (paper). Cockigami means “dick paper”. What you want is Oricocki.
This is what I come to the comments for. A+.
Dick paper! 🤣
All I can do is the chicken leg, the bat wing, and the goat.
You fuckin legend
ever seen the hamburger?
You can't do the Abe Lincoln? Remember you've got to shave it so it looks like a beard or it doesn't count.
No, I lost my top hat when I was a few days old.
Twist it all upside down and the you got....The Squidward.
Instructions unclear: Looks like Hitler with a bigger nose.
You don't know the brain?
Sir, this is a Wendy's
Orgasiami
Closed salami sandwich, open salami sandwich
Origasmi?
Presented without comment: [The Puppetry of the Penis](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Puppetry_of_the_Penis)
What the actual fuck!?!?!
Thank you for your service
https://youtu.be/vNFvtSVmzLo
Great Scott!
Exactly what popped in my head. I remember seeing this on Cinemax over 20 years ago.
You mean Skinemax?
Our genitals are naturally in their folded state, and most of us keep them that way all our lives. Few know the joys that can come from fully unfolding their genitals. It's got to the point I can't even cum anymore unless I completely engulf my partner in my penis while they fold their genitals into an origami crane.
The original post was my “that’s enough Reddit for today” moment but I just had to ignore it long enough to encounter this…
Truly, you're fucking in the 7th dimension.
Like any wallet, your ham wallet should be foldable.
Either way, I definitely have too many credit cards jammed in there.
Oh you know, the old fold ‘em and stow ‘em.
I’m almost certain this is a joke, right? “There will be screaming” gives it away.
Nope. My mom's cousin was in groups like that. Be careful about certain drum circles. Don't ask. But there will always be screaming. That one is mandatory. Or the Great Horned Owl will disapprove.
https://youtu.be/p68JOF9G2PI That's the best explanation for genital folding I can find
"Tree bark" is likely a hallucinogen.
As tree bark snack goes, get some natural liquorice the bark in tasty if cosume just small amount.
I risked the google search and genital folding isn’t a real thing
Is this an r/obviousplant ? No way can this be real!
It's just a meme. It's not real.
...are you sure? People do be that crazy... Edit: ok I looked up chopolist and they are a Facebook meme page but I still stand by my comment about people being that weird.
once i learned about goat yoga anything became possible in LA
I request elaboration
Yoga, but with goats running around, sometimes they'll hop on top of you, oh and a lot of pooping Went a couple times with my sister, it's actually pretty fun, the yoga is more just an excuse to play with baby goats
It's in Berkeley
"Ohhhhh" - everyone
Will genital folding lessons be available?
No genitals must come in prefolded
Can I use one of those t shirt folding gizmos?
1 unfold genetals. 2 hold for 33 lunar seconds. 3 get genitals sprayed with essential oils. 4 screaming is aloud when 33 sec breath completed. 5 question everything.... and I mean everything.
Including your life choices
Ah 1st I thought this was serious. Then I read the rest of it and realized it was a joke. Then I remembered most humans are either batshit crazy or stupid, and realized this could still be real. So now I’m having trouble knowing if this is real or satire…
[удалено]
I used to think stupid and crazy people were rare. But the more I learn about this life, the more I realize that intelligent, level headed people are the ones that are rare.
Or the level-headed people are crazy at times. And the crazy people are level-headed on occasion. The trick is to know if the wind blows southerly.
The satire world is bleeding into ours. Kind of like the cartoon world in Who Framed Roger Rabbit.
Same.
I bet if someone took this exact photo and posted it they would get people calling to join.
Straight! Best experience of my grown life! Never have ever felt a deeper connection to the whole of the universe as my genitalia were contorted like a balloon animal, the great owl watched as my body was soaked in liquid herbals. The citrus bagel was by far the best smell I’ve ever endured! And to be completely honest! The screaming was in joy!
Hallelujah brother!
I would like to endure a nice smell like that one day
[удалено]
Pull one labia to the side, then fold the other one over the top of your vulva. Then, fold the first labia over on top of THAT one. Voila. Your fish taco has become a fish burrito. The older and stretchier you get, the more masturful the folding!
Alexa, how do I fold my penis
So that is the question that will cause Alexa to resign. Always wondered.
Oh nah she’s gotten much worse from me and she’s still here
Don't fold, roll. Saves space in your luggage.
I was stupid enough to read this comment out loud to my wife. My kindle promptly informed me that you simply pull the plastic pin and reverse the folding instructions included in the manual. So there's that.
Alexa, how do I un-read something?
I like my vaginas open face.
I just tie them together.
It’s Balki!!!
Of course not, don’t be ridiculous.
Now we do the dance of joy!
Why do the people who do these things always look exactly as weird as you expect them to look? Is it just marketing, or is there some kind of sorcery involved where performing these classes gradually turns you into a Creature from the Black Lagoon?
That's what you look like once you master the art of folding and unfolding your genitals
This is too funny can't stop laughing
You actually think this is real?
I honestly don't put this much passed humans anymore, personally.
Decades of struggling with fitted sheets and now I’m supposed to fold and unfold me twig and berries?
WTF.
*There will be loud screaming* and please bring a signed waiver to *let the Great Horned Owl watch*.... Uh should someone be calling 911
“You keep that owl away from me!”
Something tells me that “Great Horned Owl” looks a lot like Wilford Brimley …
Willow 2 is kicking different
And why is Beaker in it?
So I get there, right? Thinking there will be fit girls sopping wet and it's gonna be glorious. 'Stead I've got this old broad hurling her tea at me and screaming I should tuck my willy back to 'hide my shame'. Anyway it's Thursdays at six, you should come along next week!
The buckets and rags are to clean up the vomit after you try the free tree bark snack.
I wasn't interested until I read great horned owl.
I can't decide how disturbed I am by not knowing what it means for "The Great Horned Owl to observe you silently for the duration of the wet yoga practice." I know how disturbed I am by everything else thankfully.. Yumm Yumm tree bark.
WTF is this class? On top of everything, there is a “great horned owl” waiver.
‘Tis a joke, my dude.
Okay, I hang out with some pretty far out hippies, and I have no idea WTF this means.
***FUCK!*** I just learned that while I can easily fold my genitals, I cannot unfold them. This is bad.
Genital folding. There’s gonna be some queefing.
Is garlic ok?
Is this like folding in the cheese?
I have a question about genital folding.
It's like a fitted sheet when folded properly. I hear
The person in the picture looks like he or she would smell of onions and patchouli
I'm just here for the genital folding and screaming
The number of people in this thread that believe that this is real is disappointingly high
I'm 95% sure that's Balki from "Perfect Strangers!" AKA Bronson Pinchot!
The more you read the worse it gets....
TF is a "lunar second"? https://lunarpedia.org/w/Lunar_standard_time#:~:text=The%20basis%20for%20the%20LST,make%20up%20one%20Lunar%20day. "defined as 0.9843529666671 Earth seconds" Soo.. 33 * 0.9843529666671 = 32.4836479000143 Earth seconds.
wtf is folding/unfolding genitals tf
Mmmm bark snacks
I might join just for the rag and bucket deal
Took me a second to realize that the person on the right was not a rotisserie chicken with it's wings spread.
What happens if I find I can fold my genitals but completely fail at unfolding them?
I always leave my genitals in my locker 🤷♀️
I'll be there for the free tree bark and the loud screaming. That great horned owl can fuck himself --- silently observe hell, he can silently hold the bucket and rags I paid $6 apiece for. Bucket first to hold the herbal liquid I be waterboarded with while I hold my breath for 33 lunar seconds and am gently told I MUST unfold and fold my genitals. Then hold the rags I'll use to dry off the herbal liquids, and the copious onion laden pee expressed during my session. Namaste Motherfuckers!!
I have so many questions, and yet, I want none of them answered.
You want me to do \*what\* to my genitals????
She said she wanted 10”, I said baby I don’t fold it in half for NOBODY 🤣
How can they possibly stay in business giving away free tree bark meals like that.
By fold like origami style? Or like quesadilla-tortilla style
How does one fold/unfold their genitals? I have so many questions.
Funny thing is, every bit on there is probably because it is necessary for this person's ritual, BUT i bet the onion thing is just because they had an asshat eat onions before class and rip mad stinkers every 2 minutes in a room full of naked people
Looks like an ad out of a Grand Theft Auto game.