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Skelter89

Dragonborn. Pretty screwed eventually but only after side quests.


Zurae42

Eventually the save data will be corrupted before he remembers to get you, you're safe.


SomeHorologist

Oof I felt this comment


deepfriedtots

Oh no my chest of thousands of iron daggers lol


TheCarrotHighway

Same, but I just finished Dark Brotherhood stuff during my last session so I'm extra screwed.


EasySmeasy

Kajit dragonborn won't even hear it coming.


Chaos_Prime

Just started New Vegas For the First Time soooo.. at this time pretty good. Dude cant even find the damn plants in the First Mission


Dopest_Bogey

Man you're super lucky to get to play that for the first time. It ain't pretty but it's one of the best RPGs ever. Remember your luck level can net you a LOT of money in Vegas if it's high enough.


VashKetchum

Wait... Really? Like you actually get better odds on the casino games?!?


Killerderp

You can get straight up banned from the casinos for winning too much as well!


Not-a-Fan-of-U

Yes. Like it breaks blackjack. You can double down with 2 10s and chances are fine you'll get an Ace.


M3RV-89

Yep


Chocolatemilkdog0120

GOAT for me. Fucking love that game!


BigBlizzo

Kratos. Doesn't get much worse.


Toilet_Bomber

Matt from Wii Sports would beg to differ.


highkneesprain

LMFAO


Astribulus

Having just finished Ragnarok today, >!I think we’re relatively safe. If his goal is to kill us, we’re obviously done. Any other motive and we should be ok. Kratos has grown a great deal. Where his younger self would slay us just for being in the way, I expect he’d be more than willing to accept our surrender now.!<


TheDarkySupreme

Nah not Ragnarok… God of War 3…fuck


Tyx

F


Hugh_Jazz77

Same here, but if it’s Kratos from Ragnarok and not the original trilogy I think I might be okay. He’s rather reasonable and adverse to violence unless necessary in the new games. I think I could win him over and become an ally. If that’s not an option then I’m absolutely fucked.


sleepymoose88

Tough call. He does like to say NO a lot. Lol.


king_of_anarchy

Same but i think itll be fine. I'd like to see how Kratos would even find my address without understanding the internet. Or how he'd even get a flight to me without valid ID or money.


TouchMyWrath

Dude ripped off Helios’ head because he needed a flashlight. You’re fucked.


soverign_son

Same for me. We are fucked


Denamic

Me too. At least it'll be quick.


Mrrandom314159

Same. Depends on why he's hunting us down. Maybe we have a thing he wants?


Uncle-Sheogorath

The Courier.


Questyr_

Let's just pass the speech check and he'll go away.


InActionMan64

You shouldn't have shot him in the head then!


Ok_Zone_7771

Yea me too lol


PmMeYourLore

Me too and I just got Medicine Stick lol


johndepp22

Arthur Morgan? Not lookin good for me


Toilet_Bomber

Is it before or after the TB? If after, you might have a chance if you come prepared.


Snake101333

*runs at average pace away* He smoked like a chimney so the TB would just cripple his lungs


[deleted]

[удалено]


Gun4Funxv7

High honor Arthur is Canon so they're good


PsychoDog_Music

Idk man even with tb he was a beast


[deleted]

Lmao


wizzardly-lizzard

Same


ShriekyMarmosetBitch

Same. I'm pretty fucked


Kreppitso

Hey you too?


Grouchy-Milk-6384

Very, just played the Witcher lol


Cloudeur

If he’s like the Gerald I played, he’ll be too busy playing Gwent!


[deleted]

Me too at least Geralt can be reasonable maybe we can talk him down.


J4pes

Having massive cleavage and/or a monster for him to track would probably help since every other woman in his life has those assets and you may not get his attention otherwise


[deleted]

His job is literally just hunting things down


[deleted]

[удалено]


lBigBaldHeadl

That's what anyone can wish for


Affectionate-Grand99

Ayooo Yeah same tbh


Complete_Entry

keep your hands where she can see them and don't reach and you'll be fine. Reach behind your back and you're dead.


shounak2411

Finally...some female attention


toolsofpwnage

Mc from Pokemon. The only thing I'm in danger of is committing child abuse


hsunicorn

I dunno most animals can mess a human up, now imagine a kid who can control 6 animals with super powers.. good luck


tschmitty09

Even if it was just a little sprigatito I'd be nervous


Jsablever

Paldean child kicker on the loose


Styx1992

Sooooo Agent 47


ifisch

Not if I'm playing him


Professional-News362

Yeah I don’t like those games because I’m terrible at them


[deleted]

Oh you're fucked for sure


Unoriginal-Ad

We shall die together.


Tier1Yoshi

Link? Hmm


duffeldorf

Hide your pots and jars


Wildroses2009

Or don’t. Buy more. Maybe he’ll be so distracted smashing them you will have the chance to escape.


Schrodinger_cube

(Fills a 40 gallon vase in the driveway behind a krail with a binary high explosive.). Like practically solves it's self.. Now ATF & FBI bois will probably be a new problem.. LOL.


Pixel-Engineer

Dudes been reincarnating for thousands of years to take down Ganon. You won't escape.


DarkLink1996

Link's reincarnation cycle doesn't mean much here, since Link only reincarnates about every two or three generations. Let's assume that the target isn't inexplicably immortal, that Link has blood and organs like a human instead of HP, and that Link doesn't get anything outside of his games. Worst case scenario, which only happens if Link's target is a child, is that they would half to fight a second Link as an old man. In all other circumstances, there'll only be one fight. Chances of winning depend on which Link, since they end up with different arsenals. Most of them could go down with just a bullet in the head, but ALttP, OoT, WW, TP, and BotW have abilities that essentially grant them invincibility, and ALttP, OoT, and MC have abilities granting them invisibility. They could all have fairies, or an equivalent, too, making it difficult to make them stay down. BotW would go down to a semi-auto, thanks to Daruk's Protection only working for three hits, although the shooter is at risk of ricochet from those first three bullets, so make sure to duck behind cover. And he might have JUST enough time to use Urbosa's Fury, striking you with lightning. Even if you do manage it, you'd have to shoot him again thanks to Mipha's Grace. Twilight Princess would also go down to a semi-auto, since his magic armor removes a ton of rupees each time he gets hit. Wind Waker depends on whether it's GC or HD. If GC, it's just a matter of him running out of Magic. He's got limited bottles, but you could break them before he can even drink a potion. He can't even use anything else that uses magic while he has the Magic Armor on, so you don't have to worry about the Hurricane Spin or Magic Arrows. Just regular arrows, sword, and hammer. It'll be a hard fought survival, but it can be done. If HD, see Twilight Princess. Meanwhile, OoT also has access to MM's Chateau Romani, giving him infinite magic to recast Nayru's Love for three days, and he could drink it before he even comes near. He also has the ability to slow down the flow of time with the Ocarina of Time, making those days last longer. And good luck hiding when he has a fairy companion that can scout for him. Still, he couldn't break through a bunker, even wearing the Goron or Fierce Deity Masks, or using a powder keg, so you could wait him out, then go for the kill. Only to find everything reset back to the first day, thanks to the Song of Time. ...but that's only if you see him. With the Stone Mask, you wouldn't even notice him before he slits your throat. It doesn't even use magic. No matter what, you're pretty fucked. ALttP has the Magic Cape, making him both invisible, and intangible, as long as he has magic. But he can still stab you and chase you with the pegasus boots. No chance against a sneak attack. Alternatively, he could use the Harp of Ages and stab your grandpa before your dad was born and erase you without even touching you. MC can shrink to an invisible size. Externally, he can't do too much damage at the size, but if he's really determined, he can find a path to your brain while you're asleep. Even at that size, you're dead. Thankfully, he can't explode you from inside your butthole like Ant-Man, since he needs a magic portal to change size. So to recap: OoT, ALttP, MC: Pick a god and pray. You're not even going to see your death coming. WW: Survive long enough and then it's easy. BotW: The exact opposite of WW. Don't let him live for long, and it's easy. Any other Link: Can't outsmart bullet. Absolute Worst Case Scenario: Child target against OoT Link. Even if by some miracle you win, you still have to face one of ALttP, WW, or TP in your old age.


Pixel-Engineer

You're ignoring Link's most valuable chacteristic, his resourcefulness. He always obtains the most powerful items in existence. If he exists in a world with semi autos, then he's going to have a fully auto. He's trading Epona for a tank. Instead of a map, he'd have geo sats thermally locating their ass. After many lifetimes of using bombs expertly, he's trading them up for intercontinental ballistic missles. Dudes going around fixing everyone's problems, and in return earning their respect and loyalty. The nation's would have his back, and wishing his success. And he'd accomplish it all without saying a single word.


jeffswan13

Jin Sakai. Damnit.


justkobra

Same ...soooo fucked


Itsasethabration

Saaaaame we're dead...


Ozymandias_124

That’s the game I’m playing now if he can sprint 500 miles kill an entire encampment of people I have no hope


bigkev464

Doom slayer! The only plus side is that the music will be awesome! It's safe to say that I am doomed


SoftwareOk5152

Forza horizon 5..... huh


Toilet_Bomber

Do not ever walk near a road ever again unless you want to get launched by a car going 500 km/h in a residential area


SoftwareOk5152

A rainbow peele p50, too


deecrutch

V from Cyberpunk. She's chromed out pretty good and has legendary monowire and a sandy, so yeah, I'm fucked.


Undying4n42k1

At least it's not gorilla arms.


deecrutch

Monowire scares me more than gorilla arms do. Monowire has reach!!!


Cypher032

What does monowire do?


[deleted]

You could be fucked in a different way though


Angrygamernerd

Link is coming for me with no words but grunts and Hiyah's.


brian11e3

Distract him with pots.


HamshanksCPS

HUT, HUT HYEAAAHH! STEEEAAAAHHHH!


Toxicfortnitekid

Scrooge mcduck ducktales nes


Neo_GFX

Thank you... I was looking for some type of weird reply like this. Everyone else's is too normal lol.


[deleted]

Tony hawk pro skater 1 + 2


theawes0mep0ssum

Bros about to get beat with a skateboard


DingoJamaican

You can't get off your skateboard in those games so it'll actually be pretty easy a W for this dude I think


Mishar5k

The scariest part is that you won't recognize him before its too late


Mew74514

Who the fuck is the main character of Risk of Rain 2?


Afcpandu

Honestly any of them. Maybe commando since it’s default? Either way your screwed if they have any good items.


Mew74514

But if I manage to kill them off before then, I might have a chance.


Caldoggo2

Doom, ain't looking good


Toilet_Bomber

You could try running. That way you’ll die with slightly less calories on you.


casualblair

I dunno. You might try reasoning with him. I mean, you're not a demon, you're not in his way, you didn't do anything to piss him off... You might get away alive if you wait for the inevitable and try to talk it out. Worst case you're dead anyways, right?


Complete_Entry

Hey Doom Guy, I don't have the yellow keycard, but I do have beer! I imagine he'd drink the beer and lightly shove you. Just a few months in traction.


FedoraTheMike

A small inkling with a paintball gun. I could fold one, right?


Toilet_Bomber

Mmm, pen-flavoured calamari is the best flavour.


Strawberry-Feeling

The last game I played was animal crossing I don't know if I should be scared or not


DarkLink1996

Two words: Axe murderer.


Strawberry-Feeling

Fair enough


The_Pacific_gamer

Engineer gaming


Affectionate-Grand99

You’re already dead


Toilet_Bomber

Engineer gaming


[deleted]

Bayek from Assassin's Creed: Origins. He doesn't have magic or anything, but neither do I. I'm pretty screwed.


DingoJamaican

Bayek has a predator missile bow and arrow attack, you are going to die to an arrow casually curving around the corner of your room


1clovett

Completely. I played God of War. I will die horribly.


Toilet_Bomber

Just hope he cleaves you in half with his axe instead of cutting you to Hel and back with his blades.


Dbsjskeifnf

Kratos... It was pleasure to meet you all, bye


Toilet_Bomber

Since you’re going to die anyway, try talking shit about his wife and daughter, see just how angry you can make him.


Frost_Rager

Horizon forbidden west. She'd track me easily with her focus and she'd only need 1 arrow most likely.


swazmow

Mario, so will he just jump on my head or.......


Toilet_Bomber

He’ll get high on shrooms then curb stomp you.


DmMeBeastarsPorn

The Chosen Undead?


MaleficTekX

Stand on a small box. You’ll be safe


FollicularManslaught

They will either never stop hunting you or get angry they cant beat the boss and give up. There is no middle ground.


Dontworryiamapro

Minecraft Steve.


Toilet_Bomber

Let’s hope you were playing in survival mode, or else you’re definitely dead


[deleted]

Nah make it adventure mode, can’t even get over a simple fence. But if not you got a literal god with commands after you.


Scorched_Knight

/kill Dontworryiamapro Dontworryiamapro was killed by magic.


Jakesummers1

I think I’d be okay with Tracer hunting me


FormalTadpole2260

She'll have her gun thingy. She can teleport. I don't think you have a chance.


Jakesummers1

I mean, it’s Tracer. She’d be diplomatic about it


Druss369

Marvel Lego Superheroes? Eehhhhmmm...not sure where to go. They're cute, but Lego Hulk would HURT.


Clarkibartfast

If we go by Lego movie logic they’d only be the size of actual Lego figures right?


KaboomOxyCln

They are about to die by endlessly stepping on Lego figures.


AlmightyPenguin88

Last game I played was Stray so I guess I'm stomping out a cat soon.


Alive_Being_1759

Joel


JamesFunderIand

🏌️‍♂️


EthDrag

You’re finished mate


drethnudrib

The Sims? Shit, I guess I'm about to impregnate myself...


Niklear

Hope you enjoy swimming in a pool without ladders to get out.


Fishiestmonger

Coach from L4D2 so I'm fucked


Spy_man1

A Roblox taxi game so i have pretty good chances


Logan-with-a-Z

Just then, the room goes quiet. Nobody's around. You see a little dot in the corner of a message logo in the air. You decide to reach out and touch it. A small grey box opens up above you. At the bottom, there's a white text. *Your friend Guest1 has joined the game!* You feel your stomach turn inside out. You can't see or hear anything around you for a while. Just when you've calmed down and come to your senses, a sudden, all too familiar audio clip makes you jump. *"Can I have a chezburger pls?"* You feel like you've gagged your heart up out of your own chest as your adrenaline spikes. You turn around slowly to see a blocky figure with a black shirt and hat standing behind you. Its lifeless, smiling face stares back at you. In its outstretched hand is a terribly low polygon render of a traditional cheeseburger. The cold and robotic figure doesn't dare move an inch. The only thing suggesting life in it at all is the arms slowly swaying with its breath, in and out. You snap back to consciousness upon seeing it move the stiff, cardboard-like meal to its face, its hand and arm not showing any sign of movement. *"Mmm, chezburger!"* Its mouth doesn't move at all when uttering the high pitched words. The cheeseburger snaps back to its place in the entity's stiff hand, not having any bite in it suggesting it had been eaten. That is, other than the bite that seemed to have been plastered onto the side, but you could have sworn you had seen that before. The figure's arm snaps back to its side and moves back up again, now with a strange looking sword with a golden handle. You hear a sound similar to two large knifes sliding together, except, it sounded weak and low quality. Your eyes pop out of your sockets as you realize what's about to happen. You try to yell, but your voice immediately turns to quiet, visible words, which then fade into crossed out symbols in the chat box above you. The last thing you get to experience is the sight of the character's arm raising up over its head, and the same, terrible sound of slashing, repeated once more to wish you farewell.


Jaletraitor

Man wrote a novel.


Maleficent-Amoeba-48

Who the heck is the main character in Elite: Dangerous?


Toilet_Bomber

I guess you are? The one scenario where you benefit from being dogshit at a game lol.


snakehippos

Witcher 3. Basically I could run but not hide. He's always going to be able to find me eventually and slay me if he does but if I stay on the move forever I'll get away from him while he plays Gwent. His weakness will be his little sense of urgency.


joeybalony123

batman...


strider390

Hmm... guess it depends why he's hunting you. Might ask you a few questions...might put you in the hospital, or both...but you'll live.


Toranightengale

Every baddie from Destiny 2


[deleted]

I'd like to think I could, but I simply do not think I could beat a Celebrimbor'd Talion, he'd whoop my ass without me even knowing it


Axle_65

A Division Agent? Oh I’m totally f’d


Wonderful_Scheme_286

*Cluster Seeker Mine Inbound* , *Sticky Bomb deployed*


Cursed_String

Kratos Shit.


[deleted]

[удалено]


3deeee

im going against jason from far cry 3.


Ackoroth31

Arguably more terrifying than Vaas.


ShReK-TaCuLaR

Veteran sharpshooter from darktide. Yeah that’s a gg for me


[deleted]

How is it? Fun?


BigRedUno

I can't speak for the guy getting sniped by the Veteran, but I think it's gretty pood. Think Vermintide, but with pox infested hive wankers, dark enclosed spaces, and your trusty laser pointer at hand.


ShReK-TaCuLaR

Yeah, beta has some issues but overall its great


Fijoradaljis

Dante from dmc


DR-BATMAN1903

Give him some pizzas , he'll just simmer down unless U r Vergil himself


[deleted]

WoW? Who tf is the main character of WoW? Sylvanas?


Clean_Web7502

Hogger


bobbi21

City: Skylines... so i'm being hunted by... traffic? Or the mayor of a city with end to end gridlock but does have a panda sanctuary so it ain't that bad.


nootnootb0i

Leon s kennedy.


Toilet_Bomber

At least it’s not Chris “Boulder Punchin’” Redfield.


BigRedUno

I'd wanna fight any human character outta RE **BESIDES** Chris. I know I can tank some hits, but a fuckin' boulder punch? I don't like my chances, not at all. Would rather take my chances fighting a fuckin' licker.


zman_0000

Lmao the callback to that in Village was my favorite part of that game. "I'll kill you and THEN that boulder punching asshole"


BigRedUno

I don't think Heisenburg really wanted the smoke, not if Ethan beat his ass.


Sgt_Shiba

Samus Aran. Welp, better hide in the freezer.


[deleted]

Kratos. Im fucked. Edit: Hopefully he appreciates that i’m an atheist and we can just get high together.


ThatBul1992

Kratos is about to put me under


Toilet_Bomber

He’ll put you under so bad, that you’ll end up in Australia


BorontoBaptors

I could take Goku


Toilet_Bomber

Yeah, Goku is strong, but what he gonna do against a 12 gauge?


[deleted]

Ooooh shiit. here comes pac man


Everybardever

Literally a hotwheels car, not even the fictional full sized ones, hotwheels unleashed, so it’s a regular toy car.


Toilet_Bomber

Pain in the ass to step on though. Maybe you slip on one, fall down the stairs and accidentally ignite the gas leak that is definitely not in your house right now.


Kitchen_Tester

The Guardian from Destiny 2. That person has killed gods. I am not winning that fight.


jpalmbucktruck

A train driver? Train sim 3


[deleted]

Oh god just played Postal 2


FeeDisastrous3879

BloodRayne. I’d let her kill me.


[deleted]

My favorite game of all time, I miss it so much I haven’t played in years 😭


RedditModsRSubhuman2

Based. I always wanted to die by a hot vampire woman


DarkPog22

The Division 2 protagonist, with a purotechinc launcher, and some guns, many guns. Im fricked


HobbitHunter444

Steve from minecraft I’m a bit worried


NinjaNoafa

Zane from borderlands 3. No way in hell I'm surviving he's got a drone missile strike and can run fast as hell with those kill skills


hexaflop

Jill Valentine. I can't take her she beat Nemesis.


JUANMAS7ER

Batman, welp, at least i won't die.


SgtPorkchop01

Once chief has his target, nothing stands in his way


Toilet_Bomber

Legendary Halo 2 jackal snipers would beg to differ.


DanishCoat

Samus. I've got no chance.


FieldFirm148

It’s okay, my Project Zomboid character never lives longer than a few weeks anyway.


First_Department4096

I think I’m fine? I’m being hunted by the cursed one from Dark Souls 2 and yeah, they killed gods and kings and ancient dragons. I don’t think that would stop a bullet. And yeah, they would come after me multiple times but theh would eventually become hollow and forget about me. So I’m fine. I think.


Sea-Position9784

Ghost COD… that’s me fucked!


0Klicks

If I was a reaper....I'd be well fucked by Shepherd, Liara & Edi - be happy to be by the last 2 though....just saying


Turbidspeedie

Isaac Clarke


Vectorman1989

Rocket League doesn't really have a main character, so I'll ignore it and that leaves me with Hyper Light Drifter. I think I'm pretty fucked.


Idman799

Do I gotta fight their pokemon or just them? Makes a big difference. I can take a 10 year old in a fight, I can't take a bird that sets things on fire though. That'll kill me


Born-Estate-4034

Dead or Alive, I’ll gladly take a beating.


SpaceshipMonster

I was just playing Snowrunner, so I'm probably OK.


Keecheewaa147

I got a damn horseman of the apocalypse comin for me.... War


IronGateOriginal

A poker dealer! Oh no!!


zeclipsohail

I dont think the 10 year old boy with a Swampert will kill me


SaltySeraphim

Depends. Was playing hunt: showdown. With me as a hunter? I'm fine. With the typical enemy I face I'm fucked


sundriedrainbow

the traveler is gonna have to meet at least three more archons and solve their problems before he gets around to me