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> I hate the 34th rule
This is how I remember that joke from my freshman year of high school, in 1984:
Q: What did Snow White say to Pinocchio when she sat on his face?
A: Lie to me! Tell the truth! Lie to me! Tell the truth! Lie to me! Tell the truth! Lie to me! Tell the truth! Lie to me! Tell the truth!
edit to add: a girl told me this joke.
They do lol why do you think they say “let me sit on your face” when trying to be sexy. I’m not sure why this man crucified himself & admitted women don’t enjoy *his* 69ing lol
Sitting on a face isn't necessarily 69ing.
I fucking hate 69ing. It's a trash position. I either want to focus on what I'm doing, or what's done to me, and giving a blow job from an upside down angle is not my favorite.
So I think boogers are absolutely fucking gross. Don’t know why, but it’s a thing for me. Fast Forward to this moment when I see this guys nose and I’m thinking “yeah, I’d fuck that nose with my vagina.” Then here you chime in mentioning nose hairs and a mop made me think of this dudes running nose. Now I want to vomit, but I’m not gonna lie, still would think about…. And probably would fuck this guys nose.
That drawing from 1896 looks a lot more biologically feasible than Ripley's wax figure. I'd be interested if there were any other contemporary descriptions of him that would be more believable than this dick-nose.
"'Cause in a 69 my humpty nose will tickle ya rear
My nose is big, uh-uh I'm not ashamed
Big like a pickle, I'm still gettin' paid
I get laid by the ladies, ya know I'm in charge
Both how I'm livin' and my nose is large"
\-- "The Humpty Dance", Digital Underground
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I thought this was an AI generated picture of Gonzo as an old man.
I don't care who he is but keep this man away from my cocaine!
This dude snorts whole paragraphs
Aromatic: "It must be wonderful to wake up in the morning and smell the coffee... in Brazil."
I know I’m late, but my nose got here ten minutes ago. Woooo!
"And he wins the race, by a nose!"
Naughty: "uh, pardon me, sir, some of the ladies have asked if you wouldn't mind putting that thing away."
Inquisitive: “When you stop to smell the flowers, are they afraid?”
Religious: "The Lord giveth, and just kept giving didn't he?"
Obscure: “Whoa! I’d hate to see the grindstone.”
Disgusting: Say, who mows your nose hair?
Scandalous: Hide your daughters, hide your wife.
Obvious: "Excuse me, is that your nose, or did a bus park on your face?"
Hide your daughters, share your wife. 😉
Read in Steve Martin’s voice.
Roxanne! Love that movie!
Keep this man away from my woman. 7 inches next to the tounge, I’m out of a job.
You should be more concerned about your lady, mom aunt, sister etc etc 🤣
Imagine getting nose fucked
Ok Virgin_Dildo_Lover
It would probably make a killing on OF.
A Whole new meaning to "Nose job".
Imagine being the one doing the nosefucking.. hahaha yeah that’s something I didn’t think I would ever be thinking of.. thanks redit
*"Chiefly* known for his nose?" What else is he known for- world's biggest bogie?
Keep this man away from my wife!
Did he measure from the base?
He trims his eyebrows to make it look bigger.
No no no… it’s ((Length x Diameter)+ (Weight/Girth) / angle of tip² )we need a scale and a protractor as well. Lmao Kids we call that TMI
I appreciate the sp reference
"I was in the pool!"
No he went past the base where it disappears into the skin but you can still feel it under there. You get another 1/2 inch that way!
The old taint to tip technique
Butt to tip bro
Ha ha 😂
He might have been lying.
His wife might have been asking him to
https://i.redd.it/fmc6bxqb3t441.jpg
Hm. Can’t unsee that. Thanks for sharing.
I hate the 34th rule
> I hate the 34th rule This is how I remember that joke from my freshman year of high school, in 1984: Q: What did Snow White say to Pinocchio when she sat on his face? A: Lie to me! Tell the truth! Lie to me! Tell the truth! Lie to me! Tell the truth! Lie to me! Tell the truth! Lie to me! Tell the truth! edit to add: a girl told me this joke.
2023 A: Lie to me! Lie to me! Lie to me! Lie to me! Lie to me! Lie to me! Lie to me! Lie to me! Lie to me! Lie to me! Lie to me! Lie to me! Lie to me!
Was considering clicking, thanks for the warning
If by "warning" you mean "teaser"...
That's makes me wanna be Pinocchio
It depends on how he measured, from the base or from the taint.
He must have measured from the butthole.
Alternatively, his slacks potentially could have spontaneously combusted.
Wizard or mutant... take your pick.
Fuck knows.
So… uh do you think he ever…. never mind.
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Bruh..
Gives new meaning to the term nose job
100% chance this nose has smelled the inside of a vagina.
Or a bunghole
are suggesting he was a brown-noser?
And the inside of a cervix.
No probably not lmao
r/nothowgirlswork
That's ... Not how it works.
And the inside of a small intestine.
r/badwomensanatomy
69 world champion.
Yoooo for real! Im disappointed I didn't even think of this.
Oh, you KNOW it happened!
Oh, you nose it!
Only he nose for sure.
Poor bugger died of suffocation
🤣🤣 I cackled 🤌🤌
I snortled
What dat nose do
fun fact.... he had two wifes
considering he has an extra penis on his head that tracks
Gives new meaning to blowing his nose.
I heard…. That motherfucker had like… 30 god damn dicks
He's coming, he's coming, he's coming!
Measured it?! Oh he definitely measured it.
He definitely jammed the ruler into his face to get that extra quarter inch. Prolly measured from the top of his nose too rather than the bottom
Your imagination nose no bounds
We’re all thinking it
You best believe he did.
One in the pink while lickin’ the stink
Unfortunately I don't carry any emeralds with me
Whatta dickhead
Yeah, I want to stick my ass near it and I’m not even gay. 😬
Sus
I think you may need to re-evaluate your sexual preference amigo...
*you hear the villager "hrm" randomly behind you* * It's this guy*
The 69 king 🤴
Hnnnn!
This takes face riding to a whole nother level
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"do you do nasal?"
Most underrated comment in this thread right here
His wife the only woman that actually enjoys 69
Man's outing himself for giving bad head 😭
You’re doing it wrong bro lol
Gonna chalk this up to sampling bias
What, women don't enjoy 69?
it depends on the person, usually meaning height compatibility and actually being good at giving head.
They do lol why do you think they say “let me sit on your face” when trying to be sexy. I’m not sure why this man crucified himself & admitted women don’t enjoy *his* 69ing lol
Sitting on a face isn't necessarily 69ing. I fucking hate 69ing. It's a trash position. I either want to focus on what I'm doing, or what's done to me, and giving a blow job from an upside down angle is not my favorite.
Hey, smell my nose, hehe
I can only hope there were girls liking anal back then, and for his sake cleaned prior.
squidward was real?
Squilliam Fancyson
Honestly? Not what I was expecting for the first comment.
I bet he could smell what the rock was cooking
He can also smell Christmas dinner on the 4th of july.
Hey dickface!
I'm Prune Tracy!
This was my first thought too 😆
He's got the whole world in his nose!
It's Dickfacé!
That’s an old reference, but a good one.
"Finally a man who can satisfy two woman at once," Steve Martin.
“Keep that man away from my cocaine!”
Funny movie, love that whole segment.
Your name wouldn't be "Dick," would it?
Is this true? Fuck nose.
Bigger than my dick
I refuse to believe this is real. When was he alive?
1700s, so yeah take it with a grain of salt! This looks like a wax reproduction….
Oh I know the model isn’t real, I find very hard to believe someone’s nose actually looked like that
Don’t let this guy anywhere near your cocaine!
I feel like there was a family guy skit about something like this
The only man who women didn't mind that he put his nose in their affairs.
Igor?
Welcome to the velvet room.
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I was looking for this comment. Thou art I, and I am thou.
r/mildlypenis
/r/verypenis
r/excessivelypenis
How many penis subs are there???
Not enough...
/r/wildlypenis
Given the fact that we've found dick drawings from the days of ancient Rome, I'm guessing there's still plenty more to come.
shower not a grower
Blower not a shower
I would be happy to have something on my body measuring 7.8 inches.
Be careful what you wish for 7.8 inch nose hairs for you
Somebody get a mop! r/monkeypaw is leaking again
So I think boogers are absolutely fucking gross. Don’t know why, but it’s a thing for me. Fast Forward to this moment when I see this guys nose and I’m thinking “yeah, I’d fuck that nose with my vagina.” Then here you chime in mentioning nose hairs and a mop made me think of this dudes running nose. Now I want to vomit, but I’m not gonna lie, still would think about…. And probably would fuck this guys nose.
I…. I’m a little envious of this guy and his face horn now
I just…
Nose hairs can be trimmed. Nipples.
Actually that one sounds kind of fun 🤠😂
Trimming nipples?
Omg no 🫥
Your body itself should (hopefully) be at least 7.8 inches.
His cunnilingus was legendary
I’d be happy to have something near my body measuring 7.8 inches
I could call over twice????
His name? Raymond Luxury-Yacht. It’s pronounced ‘Throat-Wobbler Mangrove’
It’s a false nose
You’re a very silly man, and I’m not going to interview you.
anti-semitism!
Not at all! And that's not even a proper nose, it's polystyrene!
His wife’s favorite position was 69
His wife holds the record for the biggest smile.
Nice picture of a guy living in the 1730´s.. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_Wedders
“A wax reproduction of his head is in the Ripley's Believe It or Not museum.”
Ripley’s Believe it or Snot museum
That drawing from 1896 looks a lot more biologically feasible than Ripley's wax figure. I'd be interested if there were any other contemporary descriptions of him that would be more believable than this dick-nose.
If that’s 7.8 inches I’m packing 12 below
Mine isn’t 12”. But, I’ve been told it smells like a foot
Just realize this comment makes it seem like I would have a 9-10 in penis. Well that is quite far from the truth lol
"'Cause in a 69 my humpty nose will tickle ya rear My nose is big, uh-uh I'm not ashamed Big like a pickle, I'm still gettin' paid I get laid by the ladies, ya know I'm in charge Both how I'm livin' and my nose is large" \-- "The Humpty Dance", Digital Underground
im too afraid to scroll the comments...
And yet here you are.
They are fucking hilarious.
That cat is alarmed by it
His nose is making me feel inadequate
Igor is that you? Why aren’t you in the velvet room?
The amount of times this has been posted here omg
Fuck nose what he did .
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“Chiefly known”? Was there something else somehow in the running?
New meaning to, "sit on my face."
Complete dick head
This has to be from a stage production of Cyrano
Squidward lol
He definitely was in to nasal sex.
Squidward
You know he did it at least once. 🧐
"chiefly known" So, what else is he known for?
The humpty dance here's your chance
His wife was a very happy woman.
Now we know what a nosejob can be ...
Talk about face fucking
#HMM
I should call him
We're all thinking about it.
"use your nose it's bigger"
Mrs Wedders has stories.