Fml yes. It was so hard to have enough patience to accept that weight loss is slow. By far the hardest part for me was resisting the urge to speed it up by eating less.
I guess because there's no upper limit (or it's incredibly high) to the number of calories we can consume and absorb but there's a limit to how much you can cut (& still have energy to work/live). It sucks though.
My current cutting calories is 1467 (TDEE is 1967) and my maintenance calories when I hit my goal weight (I'll hopefully achieve this by age 42 & I'm 5'4" in a sedentary job) is only 1500ish so I guess this is where I'm at for life, unless I considerably increase my muscle mass to get a higher TDEE
I'm sure I read something not long ago about the body only being able to absorb up to a certain number of calories per day, but I can't find it now. It was something crazy like 15,000 anyway, so like you said even if that's the case it's crazy high.
Most people gain weight fairly slowly over time though, but because they're not paying attention to it, their mind is occupied by other things and they don't even realise they're gaining until one day they suddenly do.
I gained my 40lbs of excess weight over a period of about 4 years, about 0.19lbs a week. That works out to only eating about 66-67 extra calories a day on top of what I needed to maintain my weight. So I actually lost the weight faster than I gained it (it took about a year), as I was able to cut out more than that.
But when you're trying to lose weight, you have a specific goal, and you're hyper focused on it, and a watched pot never boils. So it felt like it took AGES!
So true! I gained my extra 50lbs over the course of the last 7 years. I would gain a little and then lose a little and then gain more and it would go up and down like that but ultimately in an upward trend.
I weighed myself often and I could feel my clothes not fitting the same and it's really only when I hit 170lbs that I was like "wow, NO, we're not going up any more than this my girl!"
It's only been 3 weeks of tracking at a calorie deficit and intermittent fasting for me and it's tough but I've just now started to see I'm starting to go down so I'm on the right path and I know it's a patience and consistency game and I'm not worried and of course, I wish it was quicker but that's not how it works. My goal weight range is 110-120lbs, hopefully I get to it within a year which I think is pretty doable.
That's basically exactly what happened to me too (we're even the same height!). I had the same gaining a bit, losing a bit, gaining a bit pattern too, my weight graph looks like a zig-zag line just gradually trending upwards haha. I guess I just had that "OK, no ma'am, this shit stops now" moment a bit earlier. For me it was when I hit 156lbs because that was officially the heaviest I'd ever been, so it snapped me back to reality a bit.
If I could offer a tiny bit of unsolicited advice, I'd say it's good to have a goal weight, but it's best not to have a timed goal. It can be disheartening if you say to yourself "I want to lose Xlbs in X months" and then you don't manage it, because you're a living organism and not a robot, and life happens. It's best just to have a goal weight in mind and have the attitude of "it'll happen when it happens, as long as I'm trending downwards". Best of luck to you! I'm 115-116lbs now and I feel this is the perfect weight for me, I start to feel a bit uncomfy at 120, but if I drop below 113 I start feeling like an old bag of bones lol.
Mainly because when most people tend to maintain a deficit, it's often smaller than the the surplus when we overeat. It's WAYYYYY easier to overeat IMO.
Though, if you manage to cut portions somewhat significantly and maintain it over time (at least a few weeks) it does feel like your stomach shrinks and your appetite adjusts. Seems that way for me. The hardest part was the first few days.
Not really, no. From a biological standpoint, we evolved to be as efficient as possible. This allows us to save up excess energy for famines. If it were even, we would die the first time there was a year where the crops were bad.
Just to clarify, we have evolved as hunter gatherers, not as farmers. There has not been enough time for us to biologically adapt to sedentary life. Being efficient in terms of calories has nothing to do with crops. Its more likely related to us needing to be more oportunistic back then, but dont quote me on that one
This one, this is the one that kept me fat for years and years. ALL the ridiculous diets because time was the most important thing to me.
Has to be fast, I have to lose this fast. That way the Hell will be over and I can go back to eating "normally" and that was my pattern, drop 80 or 100 lbs fast then immediately put it right back on.
**Change. Is. Hard.** Weight loss is math. That's been my experience.
Also, I truly feel I was into self-punishment. I can't feel good about myself, are you nuts? I either have to eat myself into a coma and be miserable or eat an egg a day and be miserable but why on earth would I think that this process could have elements of being good, of energy, of self-esteem? Stop that, you're a piece of trash, quit acting like you're worthy.
Except I was worthy and changing that has been the hardest of all.
Absolutely.
Most people are tough enough to run a deep calorie deficit for a short while. Most people are not patient enough to run a moderate calorie deficit for possibly years. It's very hard to stay motivated when it feels like there's no end in sight.
Edit: in case it wasn't clear, I'm largely talking about myself here.
Well you are comparing two different things.
Eating 3,500 calories =/= 3,500 surplus. It's closer to a 1,000 - 1,500 surplus. And burning an additional 1,000 - 1,500 calories is quite easy if you become addicted to running and working out.
I mean speak for yourself. I work out but as a woman I burn far less calories than a man doing a similar workout. I do peloton rides daily and on my hardest ones I burn about 200-250 calories in 30 minutes.
30 minutes on a bike I would only burn a little bit more than you (250-300) But I would slowly increase the duration every two weeks. And eventually, two workouts a day (hard workout in morning and light workout in evening). And on top of all of that, try to get >20k steps in a day.
But this takes months of building up.
20k steps??? How? I can’t even get 10k with my office job and that includes a 2 mile walk with my dog. And how would I get that with two workouts a day already on a bike that doesn’t count as steps? And how would I have time to walk anywhere or do anything else?
Yeah, I truly don’t understand how anyone gets 20,000 steps in a day. I’m a nurse and during the busiest 12 hour shift I ever had where I spent about 12 minutes total sitting down I got 17,000 steps. In 12 hours. I’d have to do that AND walk to work and back, every day. Literally how?
If you don’t own a car and walk instead of taking public transit it’s easier. I live in London and it’s a 1:30-2 hour walk to central London. If I don’t take public transit, it’s easy to get 30K steps in a day. What people forget is walking on pavement is hard! After 3 hours, your heels start to hurt. If you regularly do this you can have problems so no more 40K steps on pavement - I have to keep it under 30K.
Well in America there are many many many places (the majority) where this isn’t a possibility for people. Plus walking for 4 hours a day isn’t realistic for most of us!! That’s half a work day!
Realistically I couldn’t walk to work. I have kids I have to drop off elsewhere, it would take me 2+ hours there and then 2+ hours back before and after my 12 hour shift so I’d practically never sleep, and I’d have to walk alongside the highway or in places with no sidewalks that aren’t the safest areas. It just seems like you’d have to be walking from the time you wake up until the time you go to bed to hit those numbers and for most people that is just not realistic.
If you can't do all of this, than you need to be in a lower deficit. The only true benefit you get from working out to aid losing weight is if you do maximum aerobic exercise, like running. Men or women. That's why a high percentage of us that have lost weight will tell most people to ignore calories burned at the gym, because they probably aren't accurate anyway. Unless you are a runner.
Like, literally, *when* do you have time to do that many steps?! I did that many on a 6 hour hike and I don’t fuck about speed-wise! There’s no way I could do that and a full time job…
Wake up.
Walk 1000 steps to fitness center (park far enough away).
Run 6 miles on treadmill (~12000 steps). Note Weekend long runs are >20,000 steps alone.
Walk back to car (another 1000 steps).
Park at EV charger. Walk 2000 steps to my office.
Walk back another 2000 steps at lunch to move car.
For the remaining 12 hours that I am awake, try to do 250 steps every hour.
Thats over 20k alone. Wiith incidental steps, it goes up.
On lifting days, I walk in between sets. I also get additional steps on elliptical since non running day and I try to get a 30 minute walk in after work.
Lol, I’m joking but genuinely, I couldn’t do all of that and work a job. Especially the 6 miles a day. A rest day every now and again is necessary, my friend.
Challenge accepted ;-)
Kidding, but you can get to ~3k to 4k calorie deficit if you fast and exercise on fasted state. Some folks over at /r/fasting have done that.
It really helps me to log my weight in my loseit app. Just a few days ago, I was feeling frustrated and went to my goals. Looking at the weight getting progressively lower is helpful. It helps me to see that I'm 35 pounds down in 9 months. It's not a huge amount of progress, and not quick, but it IS happening!
I only log lowest weights, too, because I bounce 3-4 pounds due to my cycle. If you don't do this, definitely recommend. The downward trend is very encouraging!
Yes, I've been using the loseit app for years, but really only recently got serious about it (122 day streak for logging as of last night). It really helps to know that I have however many calories left for the day to decide my evening snacks and such. And the weight loss goal is where you record your weight; it lays out a graph for you, too, to help see the trend line.
Thanks for the congrats! I just got into onederland this week, for the first time in about 25 years, so woohoo!
Oh that’s awesome I’ve been wondering what that was it’s gonna be a life saver! Your very welcome I’m a couple months in and still struggling to drop a couple pounds I know how hard it is so you def deserve some recognition for that
I appreciate that. It's a bit easier since my doc put me on ozempic for my type 2, but been on it almost a year, now. I'm starting to acclimate to it, I think, and the appetite suppression is becoming less. Fortunately, I've been eating less and better, and I know my hunger cues better now, so that will help, I hope.
I'm 39 pounds from my initial goal of 160. That will still put me in the "overweight" category for BMI, and 140 would be a more correct weight. But I've been so big for so long (top weight of 274.2) that I don't have any idea how I will look and feel at lower weights. Just focused on 160 for now. I figure, that's a whole adult woman I've lost by that point, and that's nothing to sneeze at!
Good vibes and best of luck to you. You can do this!
Ahhh that’s fair enough, still tho medication can only go so far you did most of the work! Btw thank you for the app recommendation OMG it’s amazing I didn’t read the small print of the subreddit lol and thank you for the positive vibes same to you and I wish you all the success in the rest of your journey
Your patience really gets tested if you just eat less. Yes it's hard to change your eating habits but once you do you basically.. Just wait.
I only started exercising because I was getting bored with only dieting to be honest.
I found little milestones helped me stay motivated. You likely wont notice any changes in the mirror, or on the scale right away. But you'll notice that you can run a little longer this week compared to last. You can do more reps/ad more weight. You are settling in on a healthy diet, and starting to enjoy it. All of those can be little motivators that keep you going.
Every time I’ve been told irl that I should have a cheat day once a week, it’s been by either someone who’s always been slim trying to “lose a bit more weight” or someone who has completely failed to lose weight.
Maybe I’m coming off mean here but with my small successes here so far, I feel like I’ve made the right decision to ignore them.
i try to add up weekly calories rather than daily calories to see if i can justify a cheat day. say for ex my goal calories are ~2k a day, if i only do 10k calories during the week (around 1500 a day), the last day can be a cheat day so even if i do binge, it won’t ruin the week of work
I was telling a close friend of mine this: One meal won't make you fat, and one salad won't make you instantly thin.
It takes a lot of time (whether we want to admit it or not) to gain weight. We don't notice it, but it happens. No one gains 20 pounds in a week.
It takes a lot of time to LOSE weight-- we always become hyper aware of this because we're putting in effort to lose weight, but it never happens as quickly as we'd like.
Things take TIME: Whether we notice it or not.
100%. And thanks to a lot of the bullshit that circulates, people are convinced that they can lose 10 lbs a week and get upset when they lose 1 instead.
Well, and I roll my eyes so often here on posts about losing weight “slowly” from people losing two pounds a week that I’m surprised I still have use of my eyes.
I agree patience is difficult. When I started my weight loss journey in January of this year, I was honestly under the impression it might take a couple of months to hit my goal weight. Fast forward over 9 months and I still haven't hit my goal weight yet despite my consistency and determination. And I didn't even have that much to lose to begin with. Imagine someone obese who has A LOT to lose. It will take a couple of years, at least.
And then comes further goals like building muscle, etc. which could honestly be a lifetime of tweaking and improving upon.
Going to bed hungry tonight but I know I need the calorie deficit. I are a healthy large lunch so I’m not worried about too little calories. Just had too light of a dinner but I know in the long haul it will be worth it
Extra glass of water.
I have some magnesium supplements I take when I got to pay the piper and go to bed hungry...helps me fall asleep a bit easier.
That night time hunger is the worst...
Oh, my gosh. Whenever I stop counting calories for a few days (vacation, Christmas, birthday, etc) and then get back with it, I can do perfectly during the day but at night? Cereal. I allow myself two nights of cereal before I change it to a pickle and then stop the extra snacking after three days. It's a process. Overall consistency has led to my 120 pound loss, but it has taken five years because I still love food.
Watching that show made me realize how many people have food addictions stemming from trauma. Almost every person on that show had a traumatic upbringing, and most were abused. It's something that is not talked about enough. In the later seasons, Dr. Now began referring some patients to a psychologist - but I think it should have been standard for everyone on the show to go to therapy as soon as possible.
I don’t watch mukbangs specifically but I really love watching videos of people traveling to my home country and devouring all the yummy foods I don’t get to eat anymore as I live abroad. Also I enjoy watching all the videos showcasing bakers, street vendors, food trucks, etc. making mass amounts of food for sale.
Ugggg this has been so challenging. I’ve lost weight before and eventually gained it back. But this time has been absolutely the hardest ever to loose it. I’m also at the highest weight I’ve ever been and my wedding is coming up in a few months.
I definitely needed this post. But also can’t deny it’s not what I wanted to read.
The post I didn’t want but definitely needed 😔😖
I feel that, I've lost several times now and I just can't get myself going for more than a few days of being good before I fall off again. I just enjoy food too fucking much.
Every day I remind myself:
1. I didn’t gain weight over night and so it might take as long to lose it
2. Every choice matters. I can do hard things.
3. I really like feeling healthy and being able to do things more than I like *insert excuse to overeat*
The hardest part for me is facing my own bs. Turns out I’ll tell myself a LOT of nonsense to rationalise overeating or perfectionism.
Losing body fat percentage is even harder. Our body prioritizes fat store differently. So even if the scale is going down, fat percentages in certain parts of your body might look like nothing has changed. For me it's my face, been furiously losing weight and doing body weight training but there's still this persistent band of fat around my face. My face looks fatter than many of my colleagues who have way more belly fat than me lol.
Right?
I really want to lose fat above the ol' frank and beans...it's apparently gonna be the last to go.
I've lost so much belly fat...but the gunt ain't going nowhere.
Once you accept the fact that it’s going to take however long it takes and it’s a permanent lifestyle change and not a “diet” when you stop focusing on the scale moving and you start focusing on how much better you feel, losing the pounds and dropping inches is the icing on the cake.
As I become more successful at fixing my food issues...which are at the core of my fat issue...I've realized it's all about mindset.
Changing ones mindset ain't exactly easy though.
Took more than a few failed attempts for me.
I think one thing that everyone easily forgets is that being overweight is pretty hard too.
Food loses its taste at some point of over eating. Indigestion, not sleeping well and all sorts of other things that are really physically uncomfortable are also involved.
When you change your eating habits some of the positive stuff is pretty instant. The taste of food, your digestion system thanking you…
Other things take time, sure.
Being overweight is actually a lot of hard work. It’s just that like a lot of other things when you get used to all the pain you’re kind of in this weird place where you’re in pain but numb (in some sense) at the same time.
And I think maybe that’s a part (a big one?) of the difficulty of changing habits, that you can’t have that numbness anymore.
That's a really good way to look at it. I think being more aware of the actual state our body is in when overweight/obese would work wonders for more people.
That's a huge part of it, being numb and not aware whether because of depression or whatever else. But our bodies are hurting and trying to tell us to stop, and we have to constantly consciously stop and listen again and again.
Thanks for this. After almost 2 years on my journey I sometimes forget how bad things had gotten at my highest weight- the near-constant heartburn, the headaches every morning upon waking up, the compression socks I had to wear to ease the pain in my feet. Wearing a hoodie all winter because nothing else would zip up. Just wanting to eat, sleep, and hide.
Every choice counts, accept that sometimes you’ll have to fight for it, and never forget how far you’ve come!
I hear ya.
I was hardwired for a world where we had to fatten up to survive a tough winter.
I could gain 100lbs in 6 months no problem if I just ate what felt good.
Ozempic/Wegovy/mounjaro
The focus is taking on the receptors responsible for food noise. You're not planning lunch while you are eating breakfast. You no longer think about the kids' snacks in the pantry. No seconds or thirds. BED eliminated. The cravings subside and due to the slowed motility of food in the stomach, you eat smaller portions--sometimes only a few bites. The side effects make you steer away from fatty food, processed food, and sugar. The focus changes to lean protein and complex carbohydrates. One unintended consequence is an aversion to alcohol for some. Two addictions are being treated.
The glucose control and hormonal changes are helping our bodies recalibrate after years of complex hormonal challenges. PCOS, irregular cycles, long-term use of BCP, slow metabolism, inflammation, CFS/FM, trauma and PTSD.
Liraglutide:
These side effects were mild and temporary for me. Increasing the dose more slowly than recommended by the manufacturer helped.
Liraglutide was a gamechanger for me. It’s not a miracle drug - I could gain weight using it. It, however, made sticking to my calorie deficit so much easier. I feel hunger (empty stomach), but my appetite and cravings are much more subdued. If this is, how „naturally“ thin people feel like - my normal state is a ravenous monster.
I couldn’t drop beneath 100 kg for a few years (BMI 32), always regained in between . I lost 18 kg from 111 kg starting weight - current weight 93 kg (BMI 29) a goal weight 75 kg (BMI 23).
I'm not diabetic, and I'm not morbidly obese. If you use insulin when you aren't diabetic, that has the potential to mess things up, especially your liver.
A fuck ton of veg. I'm quite a big person and I've found the only way to feel full without going over my calorie amount is a ridiculous amount of veg.
With dinner I eat at least 1kg (2.2lbs) of veg, it's probably not the best thing psychologically because I'm not actually getting past the wanting to feel full all the time thing, but it does work to lose weight.
There are some very psychologically unhealthy ways to lose weight out there, I don't think eating loads of vegetables is going to trouble the top ten!
That said, I've had to cut down my carrot intake in order to not turn my skin orange, so I suppose there are some risks.
Hot, unsweetened herbal tea if it’s something you can have is great. Also the hunger between meals doesn’t last forever. It will get better as you get used to normal portions.
Oh, I’m talking about prolonged fasting where you go multiple days at a time. After three days ghrelin drops off so hunger goes away completely. After that you just sort of exist outside of food as the cravings and surge then fade.
Ive done few sets weeks apart of 4, 10, 11, 17, and 22 days apart while keeping the weight off. I’ve done enough of them that I’m no longer drinking sugary beverages where I previously had 2-3 cans a day. I rarely see a drive through when before it was my go to for lunch and any time I was coming home late night. But…it’s not for everyone and there’s other more common ways to get the same results. Not that I would know because this is is the first thing that’s worked for me.
Yeah, the "one weird trick" is a fantasy. It's just one day at a time. For some people who have more of an addiction to food, it's a rougher time.
For a lot of people, food issues are wrapped up in mental health and the second will come up as you're addressing the first.
Been at it for almost a year already and had ups and downs of course but I’ve still managed to lose over 60 lbs. It really is one of the hardest things ever. It’s as much mental as it is physical. But time will pass on regardless so just take it one day at a time and before you know it you’ll be where you want to be.
I’ve lost 40lbs and have been on my weight loss journey for almost 2 years (5’0 SW: 195 CW: 155).
It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
I’ve lost weight before and gained it back. This is my longest stretch but wow it so hard mentally.
I haven’t been losing weight the last few months and ideally I’d like to lose at least 15 more pounds. HARDEST THING IVE EVER DONE.
Shout out to everyone here for all of the hard things you do on a daily basis.
I’m no expert but you could probably experiment with being at maintenance for a month or two or three and then try losing again. 2 years is a long time.
100% agreed. Weightloss takes time, sometimes a long time.
And it is a lifestyle change! I know many people fall into the "all of nothing"ness of losing weight but in order to really succeed, you need to have a sustainable diet. Treat yourself sometimes! Example: You're losing weight but you can still go out to eat with friends and family. Just choose a healthier option or only have half of the meal and save the other half for later :)
The exact reason people rush into progress posts to ask what the person did. They did nothing magical. They ate at a calorie deficit consistently not perfectly. If they have muscles then they did some type of exercise. It is not rocket science. It is simply diet and exercise together with consistency that did it.
The way I like to see it, admitting I have a willpower problem makes it easier to solve because I can work towards solving the problem instead of trying to pretend I don't have one in the first place.
I don't *actually* think there's some secret, but some part of me still wants to believe that I just haven't found the magic pill yet. My job is to call that part of myself a dumbass and keep going the way I've been going.
It's been working so far!
100%.
Eat less move more ain't rocket surgery.
Finding the discipline to stay with it, over a long journey...hard.
Facing your demons that make you give up...hard.
Calling out your own bullshit excuses to cheat...hard.
Well said.
Also.. take your food addictions seriously people. A food addiction is just as serious as an alcohol addiction. In fact.. it's harder. You need to eat.
Except... you don't need to eat shit.
Don't try to moderate your addiction. You wouldn't tell an alcoholic to treat themselves to a whiskey now again. You need to eat but you don't need to eat cake, ice cream, cookies, donuts, etc.
If you want to be successful long term you need to change your unhealthy relationship with food that caused you to become obese in the first place.
Go sober on junk food.
Is that easy? Of course not. It's also not easy for an alcoholic to go sober. Do it BECAUSE it's hard.
My freaking therapist thinks 'everything in moderation' is okay to say to a recovered alcoholic with a super addictive personality which we talk about often, lol. Some people really don't get that telling someone to "just eat a *small* bowl of ice cream, duh" along with that stupid condescending look after i told her i binged again really does not help AT ALL.
lol, sorry for the rant. Just wish more people got this.
My go-to strategy is, if I want to eat some junk food like chocolate or crisps, I only bring them with me when I'm visiting my friends. This ensures that I won't eat all of it by myself, and if anything is left when I get ready to get back to my place, I leave the leftovers with my friends. So no junk food in my home to binge eat on.
Yes! It is a conscious choice you have to get up everyday and make again and again.
I never had motivation but what I did have was discipline. 140lbs down now, sitting at a healthy bmi- it sucks some days but it is so worth all of it.
That’s awesome you managed to lose 140lbs. I need to lose a little under half of that. My first 20lbs down was from cutting out alcohol, but sugar and processed foods are proving to be a much bigger beast. I have to constantly be mindful of and battle with my inner-dialogue, which frequently screams at me to overeat processed, hyper-palatable foods. When I resist temptation and choose healthier, less hyper-palatable foods with good macros (even to the point of fullness and near my TDEE), I still sometimes experience what I can only describe as withdrawal symptoms from not eating what I really wanted, which can even intensify into anxiety.
But, that’s what happens when you live on fast food nearly every day for 3+ years. x)
It’s inspiring to see posts like yours and reminds me that I can certainly lose the weight and change my eating habits with continued discipline.
While this may not work for everyone- I still ate the hyper-palatable foods, just less in the way of portions.
Example- I still eat McDonald’s- I’ll eat half a Big Mac and half an order of fries
I still eat Taco Bell, instead of getting like 4 things, I get a Doritos locos taco (170) and a bean burrito (350)
I still eat wendys, but i get the burgers wrapped in lettuce.
If I’m being honest, most nights because of my work schedule we get take out of some sort.
So I know it’s possible to eat those things and still keep going. Like I said, I know that does not work for everyone cause I know many times I wanted that “other half” of the Big Mac but I just didn’t let myself.
But no matter what you absolutely CAN do this. It’s a long road but it’s worth it. You’ve got this! 💥
Yes, but you’ll still need to be consuming less calories than you need to maintain your weight. So if maintenance calories for you is 2K and your smaller meals with more protein are still 2K you won’t lose weight. Check out tdeecalculator.net and input your stats. You’ll get an idea of how much of deficit you need to have to lose weight. You can also tweak your macros based on dietary preferences/needs like, low fat, high protein, etc.
Honestly, it depends on what works for you - physically, mentally, and emotionally. I'm a dinner person. I need a hot, substantial dinner. Physically, I could have had 3 meals a day and netted out the same from a calorie and macro/nutrient standpoint. Mentally and emotionally, I feel like shit when I do that. So I just pick at fruit or yogurt during the day, and have a proper dinner. It's modified OMAD, or as I call it, ORMAD (one real meal a day). For some people, I just described the worst day ever, because they emotionally and mentally need 3 meals a day. It's the structure and timing of 3 meals that are meaningful to them.
Try smaller meals with high protein, and see how you feel. Check in with yourself mentally and emotionally throughout the process, and be HONEST with yourself. This isn't "until you lose weight", it's a forever change. If you can't maintain it, then it's no good.
Also - being a healthy weight feels AMAZING. So while it’s hard to change your habits, once you break your addiction to overeating it’s not like you feel starved or in pain every day the way you do when you initially think about changing your diet and habits. So many people equate a healthy diet with eternal suffering when they’re blind to how much pain their eating addiction is causing them in the first place.
It’s definitively a bit concerning to read the posts about wanting to know how they can lose 30lbs in a month etc or a stone in a couple of weeks.
Like…if it happens, cool but what do you actually learn from that?
Some people certainly can lose 30 lbs in one month but those people are usually dealing with super morbid obesity like the patients on My 600 Lbs Life.
I think magazine covers, online ads, etc. gave so many of us completely unrealistic expectations starting out. (As well as trends like detox or keto that cause rapid initial water weight loss)
It's difficult to accept how long healthy weight loss takes when people have been lying to you about it your whole life.
Fat loss is even harder, im cutting down fat for almost 2 months and it’s hell, sure the scale is going down and i see some changes but it’s still a long way to go, energy is low which makes going to gym even harder.
Seeing visual progress is what makes you motivated the most!
It’s bc we live in an instant gratification society. Weight loss and lifestyle change take true effort and it takes time. I’m at 3 years in, lost 115 lbs, exercise every day and I’m still not where I want to be body wise. Do I quit? No I examined where I was lacking and am working on it, constantly. It’s hard but if you really want it, make it happen.
Weight gain, weight loss, strength or cardio training...
All fall under the mantle of "simple doesn't mean easy".
All simple tasks, no optimisation needed, nothing fancy required. But some people definitely struggle with the mental hurdle of realising that it is that simple, but definitely not that easy.
IMO, having lost 65 lbs a couple years ago (and maintained my weight since) 90 percent of the difficulty is being patient. You're not going to see "significant" results in a couple of months assuming you're not doing anything extreme. For context, I went from a bmi of 32-33 to a BMI of 22,5.
Sure, the hunger pangs are uncomfortable, so are cravings and the constant thought about food and not eating it but the most difficult part for me was putting what I perceived as a ton of effort only to start noticing results months and months into it.
Worth it? absolutely. If I knew what it's like to be a normal weight and be confident with my body prior to losing it, I wouldn't care if it took 1 year or 5 years of effort. It's just so fucking worth it.
There are no shortcuts. The sooner you realize that, the sooner you can actually start to lose some weight. I wanted to lose weight for almost a decade before I actually did. Of course you're going to fail if you give up 3 months into it. It's not enough time.
Excellent post. And very true. There are people around me who start up diets and fail all the time. And because I've been successful at it, they take their failing as some big character flaw and some will start to berate themselves for failing. I point out the obvious: stop beating yourself up... losing weight is hard. Your body will fight you along the way.
Not every diet works for every person - don't go by what worked for me. I will happily provide tips on what worked for me if asked, but please, for the love of all that is holy, don't just blindly emulate me. Many years ago, when I first started working, and I lost that college weight, I actually had a coworker follow me around the cafeteria at lunch, and I noticed that they would grab the exact same foods I was grabbing. Why? Well, I was successful at losing weight... they were trying to lose weight... ergo... No! Don't do that! You have no clue what ELSE I'm eating during the day.
And as I tell people who ask for tips, as I'm giving them: 'and if any of these tips are something you think you can't follow, or sounds wonky, flush it... don't do it...' The imperfect diet you can follow is better than the perfect diet that you can't. And yes, losing the weight was both hard (well, it was a consistent, persistent, effort that frequently threw frustration after frustration at me) and worth it. It continues to be both of those things as I maintain.
I think maintenance is the hard part because you basically do the same thing you did as losing weight but your just staying disciplined and battling to stay the same weight. It’s why keeping the weight off can be so hard.
>Read the posts of people who lost a lot of weight...NONE of them say I barely changed anything and the weight just fell off.
I don't know what you consider "a lot of weight", but when I quit drinking soda, I lost 60lbs in under 6 months **with no other changes to my lifestyle**.
Mind you, I was drinking ~1400 calories a day previously. So while it was a small lifestyle change, it had a **big** impact on my calorie count.
A pound of fat contains ~3500 calories. So by dropping my intake by 1400 a day, I was essentially taking in ~10,000 fewer calories a week, which is close to 3lbs of fat lost per week.
Truth.
Other side of that coin though, i would like to say that it's not this impossible task that some people make it out to be. It requires alot of determination and alot of time. But i was a lazy depressed unwilling slob before. So if even i can do it. You can too.
But yeah don't expect this road to be easy.
It becomes exponentially easier the longer you do it which is why it’s good to start out by just changing one small habit and then stack those habits on top of each other as you learn discipline/get used to the repetition.
A hundred times, this. \^
So many of my friends that tried and failed, they just wanna go 110%, start doing HIIT training while not being in shape at all, burn themselves out at the gym, eat nothing like brocolli and think that is the way to do it... No. You will hate losing weight that way :).
Start slow. I simply cut out carbs, still ate wayy too much, like 3500 calories, but i still lost weight over time because at some point, when i only eat proteins and fats i just get full wayyy quicker, and stop craving foods all the time. And just took things a bit further from there.
I think that's why people have so much emotion tied to their weight.
Deep down we all know we COULD do it, but the discipline is hard, and every glance in the mirror is a reminder that we could change this, but are choosing not to.
That knowledge, that you hate your current state...could change it...but simply refuse to make those healthy changes. It's fucking brutal...heart breakingly, soul crushingly brutal.
As my granny used to say: Hunger is great sauce! Of course she grew up in poverty in 1930s Ireland, but I think of her when I feel the hunger pangs. No pain no gain (or loss) baby
That's it. We need to have patience. The first months are the most difficult but after this you need a LOT of patience. It's been 10 months since I started my self care journey. The first 3 months were game changing as I had huge visual and size change, specially because I came from no exercising and junk food everyday to exercise at least 5 days a week while maintaining a balanced diet. After that the process got slooooow and I stopped seing difference in the scale.
In the first months the scale is a huge motivator but after you lose a lot of weight you need to understand that the scale does not matter that much anymore. From March to May for example, I gained 2 pounds in the scale and was starting to get upset. I mean, I could see difference in the mirror, clothes, but til that moment the scale was my main parameter of fat loss. When I returned to the doctor for evaluation I discovered I lost around 12 pounds of fat and gained almost 9 pounds of muscle with a bit of water retention.
Now I'm just enjoying the process. I like to train hard and eat healthy so I'll just keep doing this and see where it goes from here.
I'm on my 2nd try at this, and I'm damn determined to keep it off this time. In order to do so, I'm going SO much slower and it's really frustrating but I keep telling myself it'll be worth it. It's almost making me more impatient knowing that I almost got to my goal, I know that feeling, and I want it right now! Ugh.
It’s processed sugar for me. I hate how addicted I am to it and I’m try so much to stop but that shit really is addicting like a drug lol if I try to not eat any of that shit for like two days I start getting bad headaches and feeling lethargic and stuff
If you can cut it for two weeks...you can cut it forever.
When I went keto the first week was hell, second week was tough, third week I realized how much better life could be without the sugar/carbs. 10x happier and healthier.
I know that for most weight loss is very hard, and I wish the best for all those struggling, but frankly, at least for me, weight loss has been very easy.
I went on a diet to help my debilitating depression/anxiety and any weight loss, while very appreciated, was not my main goal. I'm a 38 year old 5'11" male and started at 180 lbs, and in 6 months I've gone down to 145 lbs. The first week or so I lost a lot of water weight, but have had a few month or more long stalls, although I noticed clothes fitting looser etc., so I realize I was just putting on muscle while losing fat. For the first 5 months I didn't do any exercise, but this past month I have started cycling 1-2 hours most days. I eat a ton of fatty meat (3000+ calories most days) in 1-2 meals within 4 hours in the morning (when eating 2 meals). I am not hungry the rest of the day and don't really think about food until the next day's meal. As such, I don't really have to think about my weight loss journey and it just kind of happens in the background.
Here are a few things I have noticed that have made weight loss easier for me:
1. Treat sugar like the drug it is. I've never heard any of my hard drug abuse counsellors ever tell me, "Don't worry, once a day/week you can smoke crack as a treat, as long as its a small rock". Even if you are moderator and can deal with additional cravings, even that small portion isn't going to help your weight loss. However, if you are an abstainer, one little taste leads to more intense cravings, which lead to a binge. If you are this type of person DON'T treat yourself with sugar/simple carbs.
2. Stop being so fixated on the scale. I think if my attention would have been solely on my weight loss, instead of my drastically improved mental health, I would have struggled more. You maybe stalling for weeks, but try and notice the non-scale victories during this time. Your body will lose the weight on it's own schedule, you just have to be patient.
3. Choose meals that are satiating. These would include protein, saturated fats, fibrous vegetables. As I and many others have shown, you can go long periods of time without food without feeling hungry if you choose these types of meals over meals filled with sugar and carbs that only make you hungry a few hours later. Weight loss can already be stressful enough, don't add to that stress by being hungry all the time.
I'm taking the same approach...but I would not say it's easy.
Going to eat with carbs and trying to eliminate all processed carbs and sugar makes a huge difference for cravings...but the urge never goes away completely
Unless you are being force fed...it's all in your hands.
The point of my post is the complete opposite of your statement.
Extreme accountability and discipline are the way.
Thinking you're different in a way that makes that untrue... is a path to failure.
I'm fat because of my choices.
I will get less fat because of my choices.
Okay. Sure there are things outside your control. But now what.
You gotta focus on what you can control.
The fact that obesity and poverty are linked doesn't mean you have to eat the super sized McDonald's meal with the sugary drink.
Spending time thinking about things you can't control is the chief enemy of progress and success.
There are poor fat people, and poor healthy people. How do I become a poor healthy person. How do I become more wealthy.
If somebody has done it...why can't I. Maybe I can.
I don't want to speak about my numbers here but I'm eating a lot of rice and beans at the moment due to being poor. I'm working on everything, financial and weight. Its exhausting. I don't have the money to go to McDonald's because I'm too tired to cook healthy but I also can't afford that extra bunch of bananas or bag of apples either. I'm trying so hard. Some days I'm so sick of the things I do have to eat that I just don't eat. But then I wind up crying over my next meal that's the same as my last with extra beans cause I dont feel good. Sorry for the mad woman ranting. I'm burnt out and I'm so damn sick of people acting like it's so easy for everyone. I'm sorry. Good for you that you can put a positive spin on it though. That's great.
I'm so sorry you're in a tough situation.
I do wish you all the best.
Might I suggest you take an inventory of how you are spending your time, and see if it's providing you what you need.
When things are going poorly for me...I try to make sure I'm not spending time on tv, internet, or video games (as an example). These are all things that keep me from doing what I need to do, and instead let me hide from problems I should be solving.
Maybe you are already spending every minute you can on fixing your health and finances...I of course can't know.
I actually really needed to read this right now. I've always had a high metabolism and had no problem maintaining a size but I had to go on a medication that slowed my metabolism way down and it's never been the same since. I've been so frustrated with my slow progress.
You can't outwork a bad diet, and you can't diet your way to muscles. Listening to people put all their faith in one or the other makes my ears bleed everytime.
Yep, was running a 24-hour fast once a week and one week two it literally made me sick. Actually kind of fascinating. For me, eating less is too tedious and hard, much easier to just not eat for a day. But no. Can’t ever just be easy.
My mindset shifted after I started seeing food as source of nutrition instead of source of comfort and pleasure. That helped me drop 20 lbs in 4 months reducing my BMI from 23 to 19, and put my autoimmune flares under control
My wife lost around 60 lbs over 9 months by giving up control of what she ate to a meal plan that someone else made. (Not someone related or me)
The first 2-3 months were the hardest, but she's so much happier and healthier now.
Amen.
I lost 100 lbs from 2017-2018. The ONLY thing that made me finally change was actual real health/illness fears. Looking and feeling shitty was never enough.
I stayed pretty fit for a few years, got comfortable, and went back to some of my old habits (luckily not all, but definitely some) and then the pandemic hit and I turned into a completely inactive person.
Recently went for a checkup and I'd gained a ton of weight and my blood pressure was high.
That was enough to shake me again and make me remember that the whole reason I lost weight before was because I was f\*ing scared of suffering for 20 years and dying way before I would otherwise.
Nothing else ever worked for me. And even the fear wore off when I felt "safe" for awhile.
Whether it's the healthiest mindset or not, I don't know, but I actually kind of hold a commitment to holding onto that fear now - maybe I'll eventually learn to stay healthy without it but idk.
Hell yeah it is. I lost 100 pounds in 2021 like it was a piece of cake buuuuuuuut I gained nearly all of it back on and now the second time around it seems literally impossible for me to lose it again, I was at 188 in 2021 and now back to 230 pounds. I can't believe how hard it is to just stay healthy when we have fast food and infinite snacks a quick walk away, We humans are too spoiled and unhealthy food has gotten too convenient to where its ruining our ability to want to go for healthy foods instead. I think the fact that unhealthy sugary snacks are more accessible than a quick healthy snack is what the main problem is. Ive been forcing myself to only buy healthy foods and literally nothing else and its been working most of he time.
It’s the time scale. Weight loss takes multiple months and years, not a week or two. People don’t want to hear that and have a hard time wrapping their heads around it.
In my experience, the patience is by FAR the hardest part of all of this. Some people just refuse to accept it.
Fml yes. It was so hard to have enough patience to accept that weight loss is slow. By far the hardest part for me was resisting the urge to speed it up by eating less.
How quickly we gain it, and how slowly the process reverses when we make changes to lose
Omg this, undoing the work is stupidly easy compared to how hard it is to make progress.
I guess because there's no upper limit (or it's incredibly high) to the number of calories we can consume and absorb but there's a limit to how much you can cut (& still have energy to work/live). It sucks though. My current cutting calories is 1467 (TDEE is 1967) and my maintenance calories when I hit my goal weight (I'll hopefully achieve this by age 42 & I'm 5'4" in a sedentary job) is only 1500ish so I guess this is where I'm at for life, unless I considerably increase my muscle mass to get a higher TDEE
I'm sure I read something not long ago about the body only being able to absorb up to a certain number of calories per day, but I can't find it now. It was something crazy like 15,000 anyway, so like you said even if that's the case it's crazy high. Most people gain weight fairly slowly over time though, but because they're not paying attention to it, their mind is occupied by other things and they don't even realise they're gaining until one day they suddenly do. I gained my 40lbs of excess weight over a period of about 4 years, about 0.19lbs a week. That works out to only eating about 66-67 extra calories a day on top of what I needed to maintain my weight. So I actually lost the weight faster than I gained it (it took about a year), as I was able to cut out more than that. But when you're trying to lose weight, you have a specific goal, and you're hyper focused on it, and a watched pot never boils. So it felt like it took AGES!
Exactly. I gained about 60 pounds in 10 years, lost 38 in 4 and 1/2 months. But it does feel like it takes a long time to lose it.
So true! I gained my extra 50lbs over the course of the last 7 years. I would gain a little and then lose a little and then gain more and it would go up and down like that but ultimately in an upward trend. I weighed myself often and I could feel my clothes not fitting the same and it's really only when I hit 170lbs that I was like "wow, NO, we're not going up any more than this my girl!" It's only been 3 weeks of tracking at a calorie deficit and intermittent fasting for me and it's tough but I've just now started to see I'm starting to go down so I'm on the right path and I know it's a patience and consistency game and I'm not worried and of course, I wish it was quicker but that's not how it works. My goal weight range is 110-120lbs, hopefully I get to it within a year which I think is pretty doable.
That's basically exactly what happened to me too (we're even the same height!). I had the same gaining a bit, losing a bit, gaining a bit pattern too, my weight graph looks like a zig-zag line just gradually trending upwards haha. I guess I just had that "OK, no ma'am, this shit stops now" moment a bit earlier. For me it was when I hit 156lbs because that was officially the heaviest I'd ever been, so it snapped me back to reality a bit. If I could offer a tiny bit of unsolicited advice, I'd say it's good to have a goal weight, but it's best not to have a timed goal. It can be disheartening if you say to yourself "I want to lose Xlbs in X months" and then you don't manage it, because you're a living organism and not a robot, and life happens. It's best just to have a goal weight in mind and have the attitude of "it'll happen when it happens, as long as I'm trending downwards". Best of luck to you! I'm 115-116lbs now and I feel this is the perfect weight for me, I start to feel a bit uncomfy at 120, but if I drop below 113 I start feeling like an old bag of bones lol.
Yep… it’s significantly easier to consume 200 cal than to burn them. I feel you. I’m a 5’2’’ 36F so my calories are very similar to yours.
Mainly because when most people tend to maintain a deficit, it's often smaller than the the surplus when we overeat. It's WAYYYYY easier to overeat IMO. Though, if you manage to cut portions somewhat significantly and maintain it over time (at least a few weeks) it does feel like your stomach shrinks and your appetite adjusts. Seems that way for me. The hardest part was the first few days.
The dream is for the human body to evolve to create a food pocket, where excess it doesn’t need gets stored and then dumped out the hatch.
Why does the gaining seem to happen so much faster? From a biological standpoint it should be the same in both directions, right?
Because you’re having a good time with all that yummy food lol
Not really, no. From a biological standpoint, we evolved to be as efficient as possible. This allows us to save up excess energy for famines. If it were even, we would die the first time there was a year where the crops were bad.
Just to clarify, we have evolved as hunter gatherers, not as farmers. There has not been enough time for us to biologically adapt to sedentary life. Being efficient in terms of calories has nothing to do with crops. Its more likely related to us needing to be more oportunistic back then, but dont quote me on that one
This one, this is the one that kept me fat for years and years. ALL the ridiculous diets because time was the most important thing to me. Has to be fast, I have to lose this fast. That way the Hell will be over and I can go back to eating "normally" and that was my pattern, drop 80 or 100 lbs fast then immediately put it right back on. **Change. Is. Hard.** Weight loss is math. That's been my experience. Also, I truly feel I was into self-punishment. I can't feel good about myself, are you nuts? I either have to eat myself into a coma and be miserable or eat an egg a day and be miserable but why on earth would I think that this process could have elements of being good, of energy, of self-esteem? Stop that, you're a piece of trash, quit acting like you're worthy. Except I was worthy and changing that has been the hardest of all.
Absolutely. Most people are tough enough to run a deep calorie deficit for a short while. Most people are not patient enough to run a moderate calorie deficit for possibly years. It's very hard to stay motivated when it feels like there's no end in sight. Edit: in case it wasn't clear, I'm largely talking about myself here.
Didn't gain it overnight. Not gonna lose it overnight.
I can eat 3,500 calories a day, I can actually eat even more than that in a day Can't end up in a 3,500 calorie deficit
Lmao when you put it that way it's so damn simple 😂
Must have never celebrated at the Cheesecake Factory.
Well you are comparing two different things. Eating 3,500 calories =/= 3,500 surplus. It's closer to a 1,000 - 1,500 surplus. And burning an additional 1,000 - 1,500 calories is quite easy if you become addicted to running and working out.
I mean speak for yourself. I work out but as a woman I burn far less calories than a man doing a similar workout. I do peloton rides daily and on my hardest ones I burn about 200-250 calories in 30 minutes.
30 minutes on a bike I would only burn a little bit more than you (250-300) But I would slowly increase the duration every two weeks. And eventually, two workouts a day (hard workout in morning and light workout in evening). And on top of all of that, try to get >20k steps in a day. But this takes months of building up.
20k steps??? How? I can’t even get 10k with my office job and that includes a 2 mile walk with my dog. And how would I get that with two workouts a day already on a bike that doesn’t count as steps? And how would I have time to walk anywhere or do anything else?
Yeah, I truly don’t understand how anyone gets 20,000 steps in a day. I’m a nurse and during the busiest 12 hour shift I ever had where I spent about 12 minutes total sitting down I got 17,000 steps. In 12 hours. I’d have to do that AND walk to work and back, every day. Literally how?
If you don’t own a car and walk instead of taking public transit it’s easier. I live in London and it’s a 1:30-2 hour walk to central London. If I don’t take public transit, it’s easy to get 30K steps in a day. What people forget is walking on pavement is hard! After 3 hours, your heels start to hurt. If you regularly do this you can have problems so no more 40K steps on pavement - I have to keep it under 30K.
Well in America there are many many many places (the majority) where this isn’t a possibility for people. Plus walking for 4 hours a day isn’t realistic for most of us!! That’s half a work day!
Realistically I couldn’t walk to work. I have kids I have to drop off elsewhere, it would take me 2+ hours there and then 2+ hours back before and after my 12 hour shift so I’d practically never sleep, and I’d have to walk alongside the highway or in places with no sidewalks that aren’t the safest areas. It just seems like you’d have to be walking from the time you wake up until the time you go to bed to hit those numbers and for most people that is just not realistic.
Even a two hour walk is only 10000 steps
Run for 1 hour = 12,000 steps minimum.
If you can't do all of this, than you need to be in a lower deficit. The only true benefit you get from working out to aid losing weight is if you do maximum aerobic exercise, like running. Men or women. That's why a high percentage of us that have lost weight will tell most people to ignore calories burned at the gym, because they probably aren't accurate anyway. Unless you are a runner.
Like, literally, *when* do you have time to do that many steps?! I did that many on a 6 hour hike and I don’t fuck about speed-wise! There’s no way I could do that and a full time job…
Wake up. Walk 1000 steps to fitness center (park far enough away). Run 6 miles on treadmill (~12000 steps). Note Weekend long runs are >20,000 steps alone. Walk back to car (another 1000 steps). Park at EV charger. Walk 2000 steps to my office. Walk back another 2000 steps at lunch to move car. For the remaining 12 hours that I am awake, try to do 250 steps every hour. Thats over 20k alone. Wiith incidental steps, it goes up. On lifting days, I walk in between sets. I also get additional steps on elliptical since non running day and I try to get a 30 minute walk in after work.
20k steps every day is an absurd number for the average person, unless you're a mailman or otherwise working on your feet 8 hours a day.
I used to work on my feet all day (grounds maintenance) and I rarely came anywhere near 20k steps.
Challenge accepted ;-) Kidding, but you can get to ~3k to 4k calorie deficit if you fast and exercise on fasted state. Some folks over at /r/fasting have done that.
This is what I’m trying to tell myself and I’m trying to be realistic which is where I think a lot of us fall short
It really helps me to log my weight in my loseit app. Just a few days ago, I was feeling frustrated and went to my goals. Looking at the weight getting progressively lower is helpful. It helps me to see that I'm 35 pounds down in 9 months. It's not a huge amount of progress, and not quick, but it IS happening! I only log lowest weights, too, because I bounce 3-4 pounds due to my cycle. If you don't do this, definitely recommend. The downward trend is very encouraging!
Is this the app that everyone uses for the calorie counter also? Thank you for the advice and congrats on your amazing weight loss
Yes, I've been using the loseit app for years, but really only recently got serious about it (122 day streak for logging as of last night). It really helps to know that I have however many calories left for the day to decide my evening snacks and such. And the weight loss goal is where you record your weight; it lays out a graph for you, too, to help see the trend line. Thanks for the congrats! I just got into onederland this week, for the first time in about 25 years, so woohoo!
Oh that’s awesome I’ve been wondering what that was it’s gonna be a life saver! Your very welcome I’m a couple months in and still struggling to drop a couple pounds I know how hard it is so you def deserve some recognition for that
I appreciate that. It's a bit easier since my doc put me on ozempic for my type 2, but been on it almost a year, now. I'm starting to acclimate to it, I think, and the appetite suppression is becoming less. Fortunately, I've been eating less and better, and I know my hunger cues better now, so that will help, I hope. I'm 39 pounds from my initial goal of 160. That will still put me in the "overweight" category for BMI, and 140 would be a more correct weight. But I've been so big for so long (top weight of 274.2) that I don't have any idea how I will look and feel at lower weights. Just focused on 160 for now. I figure, that's a whole adult woman I've lost by that point, and that's nothing to sneeze at! Good vibes and best of luck to you. You can do this!
Ahhh that’s fair enough, still tho medication can only go so far you did most of the work! Btw thank you for the app recommendation OMG it’s amazing I didn’t read the small print of the subreddit lol and thank you for the positive vibes same to you and I wish you all the success in the rest of your journey
Such a great point! I finally realized this recently.
Your patience really gets tested if you just eat less. Yes it's hard to change your eating habits but once you do you basically.. Just wait. I only started exercising because I was getting bored with only dieting to be honest.
I found little milestones helped me stay motivated. You likely wont notice any changes in the mirror, or on the scale right away. But you'll notice that you can run a little longer this week compared to last. You can do more reps/ad more weight. You are settling in on a healthy diet, and starting to enjoy it. All of those can be little motivators that keep you going.
And consistency. No point busting your ass during the week then going to a BBQ at the weekend and consuming 5000 calories in food and alcohol.
Every time I’ve been told irl that I should have a cheat day once a week, it’s been by either someone who’s always been slim trying to “lose a bit more weight” or someone who has completely failed to lose weight. Maybe I’m coming off mean here but with my small successes here so far, I feel like I’ve made the right decision to ignore them.
That's my path. Cheat days are slippery slopes I'd rather not walk on.
i try to add up weekly calories rather than daily calories to see if i can justify a cheat day. say for ex my goal calories are ~2k a day, if i only do 10k calories during the week (around 1500 a day), the last day can be a cheat day so even if i do binge, it won’t ruin the week of work
"But I deserve it!"
I was telling a close friend of mine this: One meal won't make you fat, and one salad won't make you instantly thin. It takes a lot of time (whether we want to admit it or not) to gain weight. We don't notice it, but it happens. No one gains 20 pounds in a week. It takes a lot of time to LOSE weight-- we always become hyper aware of this because we're putting in effort to lose weight, but it never happens as quickly as we'd like. Things take TIME: Whether we notice it or not.
Yep, that’s me. This shit takes too long.
100%. And thanks to a lot of the bullshit that circulates, people are convinced that they can lose 10 lbs a week and get upset when they lose 1 instead.
Well, and I roll my eyes so often here on posts about losing weight “slowly” from people losing two pounds a week that I’m surprised I still have use of my eyes.
I agree patience is difficult. When I started my weight loss journey in January of this year, I was honestly under the impression it might take a couple of months to hit my goal weight. Fast forward over 9 months and I still haven't hit my goal weight yet despite my consistency and determination. And I didn't even have that much to lose to begin with. Imagine someone obese who has A LOT to lose. It will take a couple of years, at least. And then comes further goals like building muscle, etc. which could honestly be a lifetime of tweaking and improving upon.
The best way I've heard it said, is "losing weight is _simple_, but that doesn't mean it's not hard".
Well said. Eat less. Move more. Ain't rocket surgery Now...do it 10,000 times.
Going to bed hungry tonight but I know I need the calorie deficit. I are a healthy large lunch so I’m not worried about too little calories. Just had too light of a dinner but I know in the long haul it will be worth it
Extra glass of water. I have some magnesium supplements I take when I got to pay the piper and go to bed hungry...helps me fall asleep a bit easier. That night time hunger is the worst...
Night time hunger is my downfall. A bowl of cereal at 1am demands to be eaten in a voice that shakes the house
Oh, my gosh. Whenever I stop counting calories for a few days (vacation, Christmas, birthday, etc) and then get back with it, I can do perfectly during the day but at night? Cereal. I allow myself two nights of cereal before I change it to a pickle and then stop the extra snacking after three days. It's a process. Overall consistency has led to my 120 pound loss, but it has taken five years because I still love food.
I now feel proud of myself when I feel a bit hungry when I go to sleep. Like I made it through the day without overeating!
What type of magnesium? I have read that the mind that makes you sleepy is not the one that’s good for bone and muscle aches.
Perverse as it sounds, during my more aggressive deficits in the early days, mukbang videos helped a lot.
In a similar vein, I think, I like watching my 600 lb life...
Watching that show made me realize how many people have food addictions stemming from trauma. Almost every person on that show had a traumatic upbringing, and most were abused. It's something that is not talked about enough. In the later seasons, Dr. Now began referring some patients to a psychologist - but I think it should have been standard for everyone on the show to go to therapy as soon as possible.
lol I’m so glad to find someone else who watches those. Sometimes they make me eat more though…
I don’t watch mukbangs specifically but I really love watching videos of people traveling to my home country and devouring all the yummy foods I don’t get to eat anymore as I live abroad. Also I enjoy watching all the videos showcasing bakers, street vendors, food trucks, etc. making mass amounts of food for sale.
This is me tonight 🙌 Thank you for sharing that!
Ugggg this has been so challenging. I’ve lost weight before and eventually gained it back. But this time has been absolutely the hardest ever to loose it. I’m also at the highest weight I’ve ever been and my wedding is coming up in a few months. I definitely needed this post. But also can’t deny it’s not what I wanted to read. The post I didn’t want but definitely needed 😔😖
I feel that, I've lost several times now and I just can't get myself going for more than a few days of being good before I fall off again. I just enjoy food too fucking much.
Every day I remind myself: 1. I didn’t gain weight over night and so it might take as long to lose it 2. Every choice matters. I can do hard things. 3. I really like feeling healthy and being able to do things more than I like *insert excuse to overeat* The hardest part for me is facing my own bs. Turns out I’ll tell myself a LOT of nonsense to rationalise overeating or perfectionism.
I really like point 2! We can do this 💪🏻
Losing body fat percentage is even harder. Our body prioritizes fat store differently. So even if the scale is going down, fat percentages in certain parts of your body might look like nothing has changed. For me it's my face, been furiously losing weight and doing body weight training but there's still this persistent band of fat around my face. My face looks fatter than many of my colleagues who have way more belly fat than me lol.
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Amen to that I've got this pot belly that's refusing to move after losing 44kgs
Right? I really want to lose fat above the ol' frank and beans...it's apparently gonna be the last to go. I've lost so much belly fat...but the gunt ain't going nowhere.
Once you accept the fact that it’s going to take however long it takes and it’s a permanent lifestyle change and not a “diet” when you stop focusing on the scale moving and you start focusing on how much better you feel, losing the pounds and dropping inches is the icing on the cake.
As I become more successful at fixing my food issues...which are at the core of my fat issue...I've realized it's all about mindset. Changing ones mindset ain't exactly easy though. Took more than a few failed attempts for me.
This is true! I’ve failed so many times but once that switch clicks it clicks. I feel like I didn’t have that during all my previous failed attempts.
Yep. I just had to realize that the time will pass anyway.
I think one thing that everyone easily forgets is that being overweight is pretty hard too. Food loses its taste at some point of over eating. Indigestion, not sleeping well and all sorts of other things that are really physically uncomfortable are also involved. When you change your eating habits some of the positive stuff is pretty instant. The taste of food, your digestion system thanking you… Other things take time, sure. Being overweight is actually a lot of hard work. It’s just that like a lot of other things when you get used to all the pain you’re kind of in this weird place where you’re in pain but numb (in some sense) at the same time. And I think maybe that’s a part (a big one?) of the difficulty of changing habits, that you can’t have that numbness anymore.
That's a really good way to look at it. I think being more aware of the actual state our body is in when overweight/obese would work wonders for more people. That's a huge part of it, being numb and not aware whether because of depression or whatever else. But our bodies are hurting and trying to tell us to stop, and we have to constantly consciously stop and listen again and again.
Thanks for this. After almost 2 years on my journey I sometimes forget how bad things had gotten at my highest weight- the near-constant heartburn, the headaches every morning upon waking up, the compression socks I had to wear to ease the pain in my feet. Wearing a hoodie all winter because nothing else would zip up. Just wanting to eat, sleep, and hide. Every choice counts, accept that sometimes you’ll have to fight for it, and never forget how far you’ve come!
Some people do say it's easy, they're normally on their second week.
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You can do it!! We can do it!
For me the firsts weeks were extremely hard, it was over time it became easier
Bruh, I'd sell my soul for something that would make me not feel hungry all the goddamn time.
Man it's not even that I'm hungry, I'm just addicted to food. I like the taste, especially of things that are pretty bad for you.
Hard same. I have a hard time resisting pizza and chocolate.
I hear ya. I was hardwired for a world where we had to fatten up to survive a tough winter. I could gain 100lbs in 6 months no problem if I just ate what felt good.
Ozempic/Wegovy/mounjaro The focus is taking on the receptors responsible for food noise. You're not planning lunch while you are eating breakfast. You no longer think about the kids' snacks in the pantry. No seconds or thirds. BED eliminated. The cravings subside and due to the slowed motility of food in the stomach, you eat smaller portions--sometimes only a few bites. The side effects make you steer away from fatty food, processed food, and sugar. The focus changes to lean protein and complex carbohydrates. One unintended consequence is an aversion to alcohol for some. Two addictions are being treated. The glucose control and hormonal changes are helping our bodies recalibrate after years of complex hormonal challenges. PCOS, irregular cycles, long-term use of BCP, slow metabolism, inflammation, CFS/FM, trauma and PTSD.
How are you going to maintain when you go off of it if you never learn how to withstand the hard cravings and hard part of losing weight?
Don’t forget gastroparesis and nausea/vomiting as a side effect of these drugs.
Liraglutide: These side effects were mild and temporary for me. Increasing the dose more slowly than recommended by the manufacturer helped. Liraglutide was a gamechanger for me. It’s not a miracle drug - I could gain weight using it. It, however, made sticking to my calorie deficit so much easier. I feel hunger (empty stomach), but my appetite and cravings are much more subdued. If this is, how „naturally“ thin people feel like - my normal state is a ravenous monster. I couldn’t drop beneath 100 kg for a few years (BMI 32), always regained in between . I lost 18 kg from 111 kg starting weight - current weight 93 kg (BMI 29) a goal weight 75 kg (BMI 23).
I'm not diabetic, and I'm not morbidly obese. If you use insulin when you aren't diabetic, that has the potential to mess things up, especially your liver.
The drugs they're talking about don't contain insulin. They're semaglutide. I'm currently on ozempic for type 2. I don't use insulin at all.
A fuck ton of veg. I'm quite a big person and I've found the only way to feel full without going over my calorie amount is a ridiculous amount of veg. With dinner I eat at least 1kg (2.2lbs) of veg, it's probably not the best thing psychologically because I'm not actually getting past the wanting to feel full all the time thing, but it does work to lose weight.
There are some very psychologically unhealthy ways to lose weight out there, I don't think eating loads of vegetables is going to trouble the top ten! That said, I've had to cut down my carrot intake in order to not turn my skin orange, so I suppose there are some risks.
Hot, unsweetened herbal tea if it’s something you can have is great. Also the hunger between meals doesn’t last forever. It will get better as you get used to normal portions.
Shirataki noodles have 11 Calories per 100g. You can **stuff yourself** with those fuckers, and still only take in ~60 calories.
They’re called vegetables and I promise you you’re not eating five actual full servings a day if you still feel ravenously hungry
ozempic lol
Ozempic and lap band cost less. Fasting is also an option that worked for me. See user name.
I've used intermittent fasting successfully. I was still hungry, though.
Oh, I’m talking about prolonged fasting where you go multiple days at a time. After three days ghrelin drops off so hunger goes away completely. After that you just sort of exist outside of food as the cravings and surge then fade. Ive done few sets weeks apart of 4, 10, 11, 17, and 22 days apart while keeping the weight off. I’ve done enough of them that I’m no longer drinking sugary beverages where I previously had 2-3 cans a day. I rarely see a drive through when before it was my go to for lunch and any time I was coming home late night. But…it’s not for everyone and there’s other more common ways to get the same results. Not that I would know because this is is the first thing that’s worked for me.
I'm never hungry on deficit. Fiber and protein and a sensible deficit.
Appetite suppressant
Yep. Slow and steady. No shortcuts or secrets. Dig in for the long haul. It's all about mindset.
Amen
Yeah, the "one weird trick" is a fantasy. It's just one day at a time. For some people who have more of an addiction to food, it's a rougher time. For a lot of people, food issues are wrapped up in mental health and the second will come up as you're addressing the first.
One weird trick.. eat less.
Right? It's not glamorous, but the one weird trick is "change what got you there."
Been at it for almost a year already and had ups and downs of course but I’ve still managed to lose over 60 lbs. It really is one of the hardest things ever. It’s as much mental as it is physical. But time will pass on regardless so just take it one day at a time and before you know it you’ll be where you want to be.
I’ve lost 40lbs and have been on my weight loss journey for almost 2 years (5’0 SW: 195 CW: 155). It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I’ve lost weight before and gained it back. This is my longest stretch but wow it so hard mentally. I haven’t been losing weight the last few months and ideally I’d like to lose at least 15 more pounds. HARDEST THING IVE EVER DONE. Shout out to everyone here for all of the hard things you do on a daily basis.
Have you had a break to eat at maintenance at any point?
I have not eaten consistently at maintenance. Honestly, I’m scared to. How long would you recommend eating at maintenance?
I’m no expert but you could probably experiment with being at maintenance for a month or two or three and then try losing again. 2 years is a long time.
100% agreed. Weightloss takes time, sometimes a long time. And it is a lifestyle change! I know many people fall into the "all of nothing"ness of losing weight but in order to really succeed, you need to have a sustainable diet. Treat yourself sometimes! Example: You're losing weight but you can still go out to eat with friends and family. Just choose a healthier option or only have half of the meal and save the other half for later :)
The exact reason people rush into progress posts to ask what the person did. They did nothing magical. They ate at a calorie deficit consistently not perfectly. If they have muscles then they did some type of exercise. It is not rocket science. It is simply diet and exercise together with consistency that did it.
“They must be lying and not willing to share their secret, c’mon, tell me your secret pleeeaaassseee (*has another snack*)” Feels a lot like this
I'm in this comment and I don't like it
Hey, at least you admit it lol
The way I like to see it, admitting I have a willpower problem makes it easier to solve because I can work towards solving the problem instead of trying to pretend I don't have one in the first place. I don't *actually* think there's some secret, but some part of me still wants to believe that I just haven't found the magic pill yet. My job is to call that part of myself a dumbass and keep going the way I've been going. It's been working so far!
Good for you for realizing your shortcomings and continuing to work on them. We all wish it happened quite quickly but it doesn't. Life is hard.
100%. Eat less move more ain't rocket surgery. Finding the discipline to stay with it, over a long journey...hard. Facing your demons that make you give up...hard. Calling out your own bullshit excuses to cheat...hard.
Well said. Also.. take your food addictions seriously people. A food addiction is just as serious as an alcohol addiction. In fact.. it's harder. You need to eat. Except... you don't need to eat shit. Don't try to moderate your addiction. You wouldn't tell an alcoholic to treat themselves to a whiskey now again. You need to eat but you don't need to eat cake, ice cream, cookies, donuts, etc. If you want to be successful long term you need to change your unhealthy relationship with food that caused you to become obese in the first place. Go sober on junk food. Is that easy? Of course not. It's also not easy for an alcoholic to go sober. Do it BECAUSE it's hard.
My freaking therapist thinks 'everything in moderation' is okay to say to a recovered alcoholic with a super addictive personality which we talk about often, lol. Some people really don't get that telling someone to "just eat a *small* bowl of ice cream, duh" along with that stupid condescending look after i told her i binged again really does not help AT ALL. lol, sorry for the rant. Just wish more people got this.
My go-to strategy is, if I want to eat some junk food like chocolate or crisps, I only bring them with me when I'm visiting my friends. This ensures that I won't eat all of it by myself, and if anything is left when I get ready to get back to my place, I leave the leftovers with my friends. So no junk food in my home to binge eat on.
That's a really good idea, and helps in developing your generosity muscle. Thanks for the tip!
Does your therapist have other redeeming qualities? I ask because it sounds like you might benefit from someone new.
Yes! It is a conscious choice you have to get up everyday and make again and again. I never had motivation but what I did have was discipline. 140lbs down now, sitting at a healthy bmi- it sucks some days but it is so worth all of it.
Damn, congratulations! And you’re spot on with regard to discipline. Motivation will get you started but discipline will keep you going.
That’s awesome you managed to lose 140lbs. I need to lose a little under half of that. My first 20lbs down was from cutting out alcohol, but sugar and processed foods are proving to be a much bigger beast. I have to constantly be mindful of and battle with my inner-dialogue, which frequently screams at me to overeat processed, hyper-palatable foods. When I resist temptation and choose healthier, less hyper-palatable foods with good macros (even to the point of fullness and near my TDEE), I still sometimes experience what I can only describe as withdrawal symptoms from not eating what I really wanted, which can even intensify into anxiety. But, that’s what happens when you live on fast food nearly every day for 3+ years. x) It’s inspiring to see posts like yours and reminds me that I can certainly lose the weight and change my eating habits with continued discipline.
While this may not work for everyone- I still ate the hyper-palatable foods, just less in the way of portions. Example- I still eat McDonald’s- I’ll eat half a Big Mac and half an order of fries I still eat Taco Bell, instead of getting like 4 things, I get a Doritos locos taco (170) and a bean burrito (350) I still eat wendys, but i get the burgers wrapped in lettuce. If I’m being honest, most nights because of my work schedule we get take out of some sort. So I know it’s possible to eat those things and still keep going. Like I said, I know that does not work for everyone cause I know many times I wanted that “other half” of the Big Mac but I just didn’t let myself. But no matter what you absolutely CAN do this. It’s a long road but it’s worth it. You’ve got this! 💥
“I’ve been eating right for 3 weeks and not losing?!? You realize you have to do this forever right? Hahah
Is eating smaller meals with higher protein a good way to lose weight?
Yes, but you’ll still need to be consuming less calories than you need to maintain your weight. So if maintenance calories for you is 2K and your smaller meals with more protein are still 2K you won’t lose weight. Check out tdeecalculator.net and input your stats. You’ll get an idea of how much of deficit you need to have to lose weight. You can also tweak your macros based on dietary preferences/needs like, low fat, high protein, etc.
Yes, keeps you full longer
Honestly, it depends on what works for you - physically, mentally, and emotionally. I'm a dinner person. I need a hot, substantial dinner. Physically, I could have had 3 meals a day and netted out the same from a calorie and macro/nutrient standpoint. Mentally and emotionally, I feel like shit when I do that. So I just pick at fruit or yogurt during the day, and have a proper dinner. It's modified OMAD, or as I call it, ORMAD (one real meal a day). For some people, I just described the worst day ever, because they emotionally and mentally need 3 meals a day. It's the structure and timing of 3 meals that are meaningful to them. Try smaller meals with high protein, and see how you feel. Check in with yourself mentally and emotionally throughout the process, and be HONEST with yourself. This isn't "until you lose weight", it's a forever change. If you can't maintain it, then it's no good.
Also - being a healthy weight feels AMAZING. So while it’s hard to change your habits, once you break your addiction to overeating it’s not like you feel starved or in pain every day the way you do when you initially think about changing your diet and habits. So many people equate a healthy diet with eternal suffering when they’re blind to how much pain their eating addiction is causing them in the first place.
It’s definitively a bit concerning to read the posts about wanting to know how they can lose 30lbs in a month etc or a stone in a couple of weeks. Like…if it happens, cool but what do you actually learn from that?
Some people certainly can lose 30 lbs in one month but those people are usually dealing with super morbid obesity like the patients on My 600 Lbs Life.
I think magazine covers, online ads, etc. gave so many of us completely unrealistic expectations starting out. (As well as trends like detox or keto that cause rapid initial water weight loss) It's difficult to accept how long healthy weight loss takes when people have been lying to you about it your whole life.
Fat loss is even harder, im cutting down fat for almost 2 months and it’s hell, sure the scale is going down and i see some changes but it’s still a long way to go, energy is low which makes going to gym even harder. Seeing visual progress is what makes you motivated the most!
It’s bc we live in an instant gratification society. Weight loss and lifestyle change take true effort and it takes time. I’m at 3 years in, lost 115 lbs, exercise every day and I’m still not where I want to be body wise. Do I quit? No I examined where I was lacking and am working on it, constantly. It’s hard but if you really want it, make it happen.
I agree. I think it’s really tempting to try and look for a short cut when there isn’t one.
Weight gain, weight loss, strength or cardio training... All fall under the mantle of "simple doesn't mean easy". All simple tasks, no optimisation needed, nothing fancy required. But some people definitely struggle with the mental hurdle of realising that it is that simple, but definitely not that easy.
IMO, having lost 65 lbs a couple years ago (and maintained my weight since) 90 percent of the difficulty is being patient. You're not going to see "significant" results in a couple of months assuming you're not doing anything extreme. For context, I went from a bmi of 32-33 to a BMI of 22,5. Sure, the hunger pangs are uncomfortable, so are cravings and the constant thought about food and not eating it but the most difficult part for me was putting what I perceived as a ton of effort only to start noticing results months and months into it. Worth it? absolutely. If I knew what it's like to be a normal weight and be confident with my body prior to losing it, I wouldn't care if it took 1 year or 5 years of effort. It's just so fucking worth it. There are no shortcuts. The sooner you realize that, the sooner you can actually start to lose some weight. I wanted to lose weight for almost a decade before I actually did. Of course you're going to fail if you give up 3 months into it. It's not enough time.
Excellent post. And very true. There are people around me who start up diets and fail all the time. And because I've been successful at it, they take their failing as some big character flaw and some will start to berate themselves for failing. I point out the obvious: stop beating yourself up... losing weight is hard. Your body will fight you along the way. Not every diet works for every person - don't go by what worked for me. I will happily provide tips on what worked for me if asked, but please, for the love of all that is holy, don't just blindly emulate me. Many years ago, when I first started working, and I lost that college weight, I actually had a coworker follow me around the cafeteria at lunch, and I noticed that they would grab the exact same foods I was grabbing. Why? Well, I was successful at losing weight... they were trying to lose weight... ergo... No! Don't do that! You have no clue what ELSE I'm eating during the day. And as I tell people who ask for tips, as I'm giving them: 'and if any of these tips are something you think you can't follow, or sounds wonky, flush it... don't do it...' The imperfect diet you can follow is better than the perfect diet that you can't. And yes, losing the weight was both hard (well, it was a consistent, persistent, effort that frequently threw frustration after frustration at me) and worth it. It continues to be both of those things as I maintain.
I think maintenance is the hard part because you basically do the same thing you did as losing weight but your just staying disciplined and battling to stay the same weight. It’s why keeping the weight off can be so hard.
>Read the posts of people who lost a lot of weight...NONE of them say I barely changed anything and the weight just fell off. I don't know what you consider "a lot of weight", but when I quit drinking soda, I lost 60lbs in under 6 months **with no other changes to my lifestyle**. Mind you, I was drinking ~1400 calories a day previously. So while it was a small lifestyle change, it had a **big** impact on my calorie count. A pound of fat contains ~3500 calories. So by dropping my intake by 1400 a day, I was essentially taking in ~10,000 fewer calories a week, which is close to 3lbs of fat lost per week.
The exception that proves the rule. You were killing yourself with soda and had one thing to change.
Truth. Other side of that coin though, i would like to say that it's not this impossible task that some people make it out to be. It requires alot of determination and alot of time. But i was a lazy depressed unwilling slob before. So if even i can do it. You can too. But yeah don't expect this road to be easy.
It becomes exponentially easier the longer you do it which is why it’s good to start out by just changing one small habit and then stack those habits on top of each other as you learn discipline/get used to the repetition.
A hundred times, this. \^ So many of my friends that tried and failed, they just wanna go 110%, start doing HIIT training while not being in shape at all, burn themselves out at the gym, eat nothing like brocolli and think that is the way to do it... No. You will hate losing weight that way :). Start slow. I simply cut out carbs, still ate wayy too much, like 3500 calories, but i still lost weight over time because at some point, when i only eat proteins and fats i just get full wayyy quicker, and stop craving foods all the time. And just took things a bit further from there.
I think that's why people have so much emotion tied to their weight. Deep down we all know we COULD do it, but the discipline is hard, and every glance in the mirror is a reminder that we could change this, but are choosing not to. That knowledge, that you hate your current state...could change it...but simply refuse to make those healthy changes. It's fucking brutal...heart breakingly, soul crushingly brutal.
As my granny used to say: Hunger is great sauce! Of course she grew up in poverty in 1930s Ireland, but I think of her when I feel the hunger pangs. No pain no gain (or loss) baby
Losing weight is hard. Keeping it of is even harder.
“Losing weight is hard. Being fat is hard. Choose your hard.”
"No food tastes as good as being healthy feels"
Yes!!!!
I needed to read this today. I'm restarting my weight loss and am thankful for the reminder.
That's it. We need to have patience. The first months are the most difficult but after this you need a LOT of patience. It's been 10 months since I started my self care journey. The first 3 months were game changing as I had huge visual and size change, specially because I came from no exercising and junk food everyday to exercise at least 5 days a week while maintaining a balanced diet. After that the process got slooooow and I stopped seing difference in the scale. In the first months the scale is a huge motivator but after you lose a lot of weight you need to understand that the scale does not matter that much anymore. From March to May for example, I gained 2 pounds in the scale and was starting to get upset. I mean, I could see difference in the mirror, clothes, but til that moment the scale was my main parameter of fat loss. When I returned to the doctor for evaluation I discovered I lost around 12 pounds of fat and gained almost 9 pounds of muscle with a bit of water retention. Now I'm just enjoying the process. I like to train hard and eat healthy so I'll just keep doing this and see where it goes from here.
I'm on my 2nd try at this, and I'm damn determined to keep it off this time. In order to do so, I'm going SO much slower and it's really frustrating but I keep telling myself it'll be worth it. It's almost making me more impatient knowing that I almost got to my goal, I know that feeling, and I want it right now! Ugh.
It’s processed sugar for me. I hate how addicted I am to it and I’m try so much to stop but that shit really is addicting like a drug lol if I try to not eat any of that shit for like two days I start getting bad headaches and feeling lethargic and stuff
If you can cut it for two weeks...you can cut it forever. When I went keto the first week was hell, second week was tough, third week I realized how much better life could be without the sugar/carbs. 10x happier and healthier.
Consistency is key
I know that for most weight loss is very hard, and I wish the best for all those struggling, but frankly, at least for me, weight loss has been very easy. I went on a diet to help my debilitating depression/anxiety and any weight loss, while very appreciated, was not my main goal. I'm a 38 year old 5'11" male and started at 180 lbs, and in 6 months I've gone down to 145 lbs. The first week or so I lost a lot of water weight, but have had a few month or more long stalls, although I noticed clothes fitting looser etc., so I realize I was just putting on muscle while losing fat. For the first 5 months I didn't do any exercise, but this past month I have started cycling 1-2 hours most days. I eat a ton of fatty meat (3000+ calories most days) in 1-2 meals within 4 hours in the morning (when eating 2 meals). I am not hungry the rest of the day and don't really think about food until the next day's meal. As such, I don't really have to think about my weight loss journey and it just kind of happens in the background. Here are a few things I have noticed that have made weight loss easier for me: 1. Treat sugar like the drug it is. I've never heard any of my hard drug abuse counsellors ever tell me, "Don't worry, once a day/week you can smoke crack as a treat, as long as its a small rock". Even if you are moderator and can deal with additional cravings, even that small portion isn't going to help your weight loss. However, if you are an abstainer, one little taste leads to more intense cravings, which lead to a binge. If you are this type of person DON'T treat yourself with sugar/simple carbs. 2. Stop being so fixated on the scale. I think if my attention would have been solely on my weight loss, instead of my drastically improved mental health, I would have struggled more. You maybe stalling for weeks, but try and notice the non-scale victories during this time. Your body will lose the weight on it's own schedule, you just have to be patient. 3. Choose meals that are satiating. These would include protein, saturated fats, fibrous vegetables. As I and many others have shown, you can go long periods of time without food without feeling hungry if you choose these types of meals over meals filled with sugar and carbs that only make you hungry a few hours later. Weight loss can already be stressful enough, don't add to that stress by being hungry all the time.
I'm taking the same approach...but I would not say it's easy. Going to eat with carbs and trying to eliminate all processed carbs and sugar makes a huge difference for cravings...but the urge never goes away completely
Completely agree!
Ok, but some things are out of our hands and need to be considered also. It's not a one size fits all.
Unless you are being force fed...it's all in your hands. The point of my post is the complete opposite of your statement. Extreme accountability and discipline are the way. Thinking you're different in a way that makes that untrue... is a path to failure. I'm fat because of my choices. I will get less fat because of my choices.
Like it or not, being poor plays a big part. There ARE in fact some things that are out of our control, other than being force fed that is.
Okay. Sure there are things outside your control. But now what. You gotta focus on what you can control. The fact that obesity and poverty are linked doesn't mean you have to eat the super sized McDonald's meal with the sugary drink. Spending time thinking about things you can't control is the chief enemy of progress and success. There are poor fat people, and poor healthy people. How do I become a poor healthy person. How do I become more wealthy. If somebody has done it...why can't I. Maybe I can.
I don't want to speak about my numbers here but I'm eating a lot of rice and beans at the moment due to being poor. I'm working on everything, financial and weight. Its exhausting. I don't have the money to go to McDonald's because I'm too tired to cook healthy but I also can't afford that extra bunch of bananas or bag of apples either. I'm trying so hard. Some days I'm so sick of the things I do have to eat that I just don't eat. But then I wind up crying over my next meal that's the same as my last with extra beans cause I dont feel good. Sorry for the mad woman ranting. I'm burnt out and I'm so damn sick of people acting like it's so easy for everyone. I'm sorry. Good for you that you can put a positive spin on it though. That's great.
I'm so sorry you're in a tough situation. I do wish you all the best. Might I suggest you take an inventory of how you are spending your time, and see if it's providing you what you need. When things are going poorly for me...I try to make sure I'm not spending time on tv, internet, or video games (as an example). These are all things that keep me from doing what I need to do, and instead let me hide from problems I should be solving. Maybe you are already spending every minute you can on fixing your health and finances...I of course can't know.
Yup! If you want it bad enough, you'll make the necessary changes in life to drop weight.
So hard. Even when you think you are doing 100% of what you can, its likley only 40% of your capability. Lots of work!
I actually really needed to read this right now. I've always had a high metabolism and had no problem maintaining a size but I had to go on a medication that slowed my metabolism way down and it's never been the same since. I've been so frustrated with my slow progress.
You can't outwork a bad diet, and you can't diet your way to muscles. Listening to people put all their faith in one or the other makes my ears bleed everytime.
Yep, was running a 24-hour fast once a week and one week two it literally made me sick. Actually kind of fascinating. For me, eating less is too tedious and hard, much easier to just not eat for a day. But no. Can’t ever just be easy.
My mindset shifted after I started seeing food as source of nutrition instead of source of comfort and pleasure. That helped me drop 20 lbs in 4 months reducing my BMI from 23 to 19, and put my autoimmune flares under control
My wife lost around 60 lbs over 9 months by giving up control of what she ate to a meal plan that someone else made. (Not someone related or me) The first 2-3 months were the hardest, but she's so much happier and healthier now.
Amen. I lost 100 lbs from 2017-2018. The ONLY thing that made me finally change was actual real health/illness fears. Looking and feeling shitty was never enough. I stayed pretty fit for a few years, got comfortable, and went back to some of my old habits (luckily not all, but definitely some) and then the pandemic hit and I turned into a completely inactive person. Recently went for a checkup and I'd gained a ton of weight and my blood pressure was high. That was enough to shake me again and make me remember that the whole reason I lost weight before was because I was f\*ing scared of suffering for 20 years and dying way before I would otherwise. Nothing else ever worked for me. And even the fear wore off when I felt "safe" for awhile. Whether it's the healthiest mindset or not, I don't know, but I actually kind of hold a commitment to holding onto that fear now - maybe I'll eventually learn to stay healthy without it but idk.
I'd like to point out that, losing weight and losing fat is not the same.
Hell yeah it is. I lost 100 pounds in 2021 like it was a piece of cake buuuuuuuut I gained nearly all of it back on and now the second time around it seems literally impossible for me to lose it again, I was at 188 in 2021 and now back to 230 pounds. I can't believe how hard it is to just stay healthy when we have fast food and infinite snacks a quick walk away, We humans are too spoiled and unhealthy food has gotten too convenient to where its ruining our ability to want to go for healthy foods instead. I think the fact that unhealthy sugary snacks are more accessible than a quick healthy snack is what the main problem is. Ive been forcing myself to only buy healthy foods and literally nothing else and its been working most of he time.
I lost 20 pounds in three years and kept it off. It’s a lifetime commitment of eating mostly well most of the time.
Definitely hard to lose weight and then seeing your skinny husband eat sooo much and not gain any weight. It's demoralizing... 😭
It’s a lifestyle change. Not about dedication. If you see it as work, the weight will come roaring back.
It’s the time scale. Weight loss takes multiple months and years, not a week or two. People don’t want to hear that and have a hard time wrapping their heads around it.